EMERGENCY EMERGENCY EMERGENCY  12:45 pm February 6, 2012

Orly Taitz Orders Prosecution of Everyone Who Disagrees With Her

by Liz Colville

hey spider eyes

In a shocking turn of events, the birther trial in Georgia of which Orly Taitz tries to be a part despite the fact that she can’t practice law in Georgia (and probably anywhere else) has ruled in favor of sanity i.e. Obama! Which means that Taitz, who evidently steals bedspreads from Las Vegas hotels and fashions them into suits, has now ordered an “emergency appeal,” which is the kind of thing that Actual Lawyers use when their client is about to be put to death, etc. But for Orly Taitz one Georgia citizen’s loss of a trial to prove Obama is a heathen from abroad is AKIN TO DEATH, so, writing in five different fonts, including underrated favorite of seventh-grade history presentations, StageCoach, and using, variously, all-caps, bold and underline to convey her point, Taitz has ordered for the criminal investigation of the presiding judge in the case, Michael Malihi, and Obama’s lawyers, and of course Obama, as well as, probably, the court typist, the courtroom attendants, and that one elderly lady who was drinking from the water fountain outside the courtroom when the trial let out.

Judging by the fact that between zero and one news outlets even covered the Farrar v. Obama ruling, really the only noteworthy thing about this is Orly Taitz’s ability to make a really strong case for herself as a lawyer by insulting a judge and otherwise throwing a tantrum in broken legalese. Some excerpts from the “official” appeal:

This behavior of judge Malihi was so outrageous, that not only his advisory opinion needs to be set aside, as not grounded in any fact or law, but state and county grand juries and the Attorney General of Georgia need to launch a criminal investigation into actions of judge Malihi and possible direct or indirect undue influence by Obama. Decision by Malihi reads, as if it was entirely written by Obama’s personal attorneys Robert Bauer and Judith Corley of Perkins Coie and rubber stamped by Malihi. It is noteworthy, that both Robert Bauer and Judith Corley need to be criminally investigated as well, as both of them were complicit in aiding and abetting Obama in presenting to the public on April 27, 2011 a computer generated forgery and claiming it to be a true and correct copy of Obama’s birth certificate.

Malihi, national hero, actually said in his decision that he normally rules for the plaintiff when the defendant fails to show up in court, but he ruled in favor of Obama, even though Obama didn’t show up, because, well, the plaintiff’s case was a jooo-ooooo-ooooke:

The Court finds the testimony of the witnesses, as well as the exhibits tendered, to be of little, if any, probative value, and thus wholly insufficient to support Plaintiffs’ allegations.

No “probative value”! Likewise Orly Titz (sic).

Taitz in the end calls for the “criminal prosecution” of Obama and all his “accomplices,” which apparently is the term for someone who actually knows how to draw up a normal-looking legal document.

Some other gems from the appeal:

  • “As Obama did not appear in court and did not provide any records, it became clear that Barack Obama is even more of a fraud than previously thought.”
  • “The only thing Obama provided, was an empty chair. Did the empty chair testify under penalty of perjury in front of judge Malihi and told him, that Obama was born in this country? Did the empty chair provide Malihi with any evidence, with the original birth certificate or a certified copy?”
  • “It appears that the advisory opinion by judge Malihi was made as a result of some undue pressure from the defendant Obama, who as a sitting President has vast abilities to apply undue pressure on judges.”

Also, of course, Taitz has taken to her blog to utter profound musings such as this one:

DOES ANYONE KNOW, WHAT IS MALIHI’S MIDDLE NAME? I SAW MICHAEL M. MALIHI. WHAT DOES M STAND FOR?

[Fox 19/Crazy Internet People]

 
Related video

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 170 comments }

nounverb911 February 6, 2012 at 12:47 pm

Sounds nazi-ish to me. Isn't the constitution somewhere on the Bar exam? (BTW When does her "Green" card expire?)

BerkeleyBear February 6, 2012 at 4:22 pm

Actually, depending on which year you take the bar exam in California, there might be only one section of multiple choice questions on the United States Constitution in it, or there might be several essays. The bar exam also tends to question the same issues over and over (ie things where there is a "right" answer based on precedent), so a good cram program can prep even complete sociopaths to pass – there's a reason people are willing to spend thousands of bucks on those courses. Now, if I didn't know what a pain in the ass the security on the bar is, I'd think she paid someone off to take it for her, but my guess is that she managed to pass by parroting the entire BarBri outline series without learning anything.

ifthethunderdontgetya February 6, 2012 at 12:49 pm

Hotter, wetter, tighter LIBEL!
~

tcaalaw February 7, 2012 at 12:06 am

I don't know where the "hotter, wetter, tighter" meme got started, but I wish it would stop because the use of those three words in connection with Orly Taitz makes me throw up in my mouth a little each time I read them.

FlyOverGirl February 6, 2012 at 12:50 pm

What the hell does "Orly" stand for?

nounverb911 February 6, 2012 at 12:52 pm

It's French for "the other airport in Paris".

Biel_ze_Bubba February 6, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Must be tough, being named after your landing strip.

Chet Kincaid February 6, 2012 at 2:12 pm

Zing! I mean zoom!

tealsheart February 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm

Well, I heard, that it has to do with, how do I say this without offending some here (lol)… OralSexual acts…

But OILY works better

Swampgas_Man February 6, 2012 at 5:06 pm

"Orly to bed and Orly to rise. . . "

Tundra Grifter February 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm

"Who was the greatest Civil War general?"

"U.S. Grant. Or Lee."

valthemus February 6, 2012 at 1:10 pm

According to my book of "35,000 + Baby Names", which I keep handy for such occasions, "Orly" is an old Irish name meaning "golden woman." I suppose a modern translation is "bottle blonde in lame lamé."

widestanceshakedown February 6, 2012 at 1:12 pm

Personal drainage?

bagofmice February 6, 2012 at 1:14 pm

The predicate for YARLY?

DeeJayKitteh February 6, 2012 at 1:18 pm

An internet meme featuring a picture of a surprised-looking owl?

Dashboard Buddha February 6, 2012 at 1:50 pm
johnnyzhivago February 6, 2012 at 12:50 pm

Haven't you heard, all the BIG LAWYERS use several fonts in their "briefs" and their "appeals". I hear Comic Sans is especially good for signifying gravitas, like in a death penalty appeal or parking violation.

paris biltong February 6, 2012 at 12:56 pm

Wingdings is the font she should use.

bagofmice February 6, 2012 at 1:16 pm

It would retain the same level of parsability.

ttommyunger February 6, 2012 at 12:50 pm

The Oily Taint: "Suspects no one, and suspects everyone."

hagajim February 6, 2012 at 12:51 pm

I'm getting a little tired of Orly's taint….can we just cover her in Santorum and be done with it.

Trannysurprise February 6, 2012 at 12:51 pm

Wouldn't she be shot by now if she pulled this shit in whatever Fuckistan she's from?

freakishlywrong February 6, 2012 at 12:51 pm

Where's this pesty cunt''s birf certificate? They just never stop. We're re-litigating the fucking pill again, ferfuck'ssake.

FraAnima February 6, 2012 at 12:51 pm

The M stands for Mohammed, of course, as evidenced by his hate for America.

Isyaignert February 6, 2012 at 2:26 pm

Jesus Christ's middle name is Hussein.

baghdadroz February 7, 2012 at 12:45 pm

LOL. No, it's not. It's Henrietta. Jesus is a trannie.

Maman February 6, 2012 at 12:52 pm

The use of StageCoach proves that she is country and western.

Chet Kincaid February 6, 2012 at 2:14 pm

She likes both kinds a fonts!!

prommie February 6, 2012 at 12:52 pm

I could swear I remember her from somewhere. I think I saw her once, standing on the corner of Pacific Avenue, near the Flamingo motel in Atlantic City, on a Tuesday night, yes, that was it!

widestanceshakedown February 6, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Must have been early if she could still stand.

Dudleydidwrong February 6, 2012 at 2:30 pm

MIWLF

OC_Surf_Serf February 6, 2012 at 12:52 pm

insulting a judge and otherwise throwing a tantrum in broken legalese…

'round here that is referred to as a Tuesday.

Trannysurprise February 6, 2012 at 12:56 pm

Malihi OR Malia???? Coincidence????

I DONT THINK SO NICE TRY OBUMMMER!!!!1!!1!

paris biltong February 6, 2012 at 1:01 pm

Milhous?

johnnyzhivago February 6, 2012 at 12:53 pm

Orly is in line to be the first judge on Newt's moon colony.

YasserArraFeck February 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm

The First Lunar* Circuit…..one of the more conservative courts in the Solar System

*Lunatic?

Biel_ze_Bubba February 6, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Can we send her up in advance? Like, 20 or 30 years in advance?

RedneckMuslin February 6, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Only if that means tomorrow.

Crank_Tango February 6, 2012 at 12:53 pm

Hey Orly! I have a ranch house in suburbia that needs a root canal, maybe you should take care of that first.

Steverino247 February 6, 2012 at 12:53 pm

Wait! Let me feenish!

Oh, you're finished, honey. Now step away from the news van so we can go cover the Girl Scout cookie sale at the local supermarket.

paris biltong February 6, 2012 at 12:54 pm

Malihi sounds suspiciously Swahili. Birth certificate, please.

Callyson February 6, 2012 at 12:54 pm

WHAT DOES M STAND FOR?
Managing not to ROTFL over this wingnut's atrocious writing, convoluted logic and utter insanity, that's what the M stands for…

OC_Surf_Serf February 6, 2012 at 12:54 pm

MICHAEL M. MALIHI. WHAT DOES M STAND FOR?!!??

Meh?

bagofmice February 6, 2012 at 1:21 pm

The mighty capital M stands on its two strong legs to support the weight of the capital V in the middle. Together, the IVI construct is strong enough to define the em, and indeed point size for all fonts. The welding at the serifs ensures an even stronger bond than Impact.

fo realz.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Em_(typography)

ShaveTheWhales February 6, 2012 at 4:05 pm

"Motherfucking", obvs.

Swampgas_Man February 6, 2012 at 5:10 pm

Mugwump.

memzilla February 6, 2012 at 12:55 pm

Orly Taintz' badly crafted, badly composed, and highly laughable appeal is a Long Form Mirth Certificate.

Terry February 6, 2012 at 12:55 pm

I don't know a thing about Judge Malihi, but I really feel for him having to hear this case.

Biel_ze_Bubba February 6, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Is there any reason he shouldn't sock her with all the costs of this farce? Let the crazy harpie spend her vast excess of spare time fighting off seizures and garnishments, out of our sight.

Chet Kincaid February 6, 2012 at 2:19 pm

This whole thing could be cleared up, if she'd just get those seizures diagnosed.

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:03 pm

I don't feel bad for him, read his whine about Mr. Obama's dismissal of his authoritay!

tealsheart February 6, 2012 at 12:56 pm

I read "In broken Senegalese" started thinking she could be on to sumthing.

Is it ever too early to wakeUp?

Lascauxcaveman February 6, 2012 at 12:56 pm

Who can resist StageCoach? That is one awesome font.

ManchuCandidate February 6, 2012 at 1:01 pm

I'd rather she use "Countdown" font. It fits her crazy ass SF allegations.

MOG2410 February 6, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Explains why they won't let us have it here in the asylum.

pinkocommi February 6, 2012 at 12:57 pm

Orly Taitz … Orly Taitz … That's the part of the male anatomy between the scrotum and anus, right? That so easily gets covered in santorum.

RedneckMuslin February 6, 2012 at 2:30 pm

No that's the taint. Taitz is the asshole. It taitz bad.

proudgrampa February 6, 2012 at 12:58 pm

Isn't there some judge, some where, who will just throw her ass into jail?

GOPCrusher February 6, 2012 at 2:26 pm

I think the one that threw out her original Birther case threatened to hold her in contempt if she didn't quit filing frivolous lawsuits.

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:04 pm

That judge actually called her "stupid" in his ruling.

EatsBabyDingos February 6, 2012 at 12:58 pm

She's so crazy I have to doubt she uses toilet paper. That was she can scratch the judicial opinions with her finger and legitimately say the opinion stinks.

FraAnima February 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm

Oily uses the most articulate of legal arguments, also too:

'Orly Taitz, Counsel for Plaintiffs,flew to Hawaii 5 times at her own dime'.

A frickin' Clarence Darrow.

chicken_thief February 6, 2012 at 1:07 pm

What's her point – that Hawaii should be more judicious in who they let into the state?

yrbmegr February 6, 2012 at 3:22 pm

That Hawaii should have the common decency to be closer to everywhere else so that investigating Obama's birth in not-Hawaii would be cheaper.

Biel_ze_Bubba February 6, 2012 at 2:06 pm

I flew to Hawaii once, on my own dime, but I never made a federal case out of it.

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Oily belittles a plaintiff who couldn't afford an attorney, they whines that she has to travel to Hawaii "at (sic) her own dime".

Attorneys working for clients travel on the client's dime.

Rosie_Scenario February 6, 2012 at 1:00 pm

When does she have time to practice dentistry, law, and real estate? No visible means of support? In other news, Zsa Zsa Gabor is 95 today. And she wants her accent back.

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:19 pm

In California an attorney doesn't need a real-estate license. Just a note.

Zsa Zsa was hungarian and had a much cuter accent. Or was that Eva….

DerrickWildcat February 6, 2012 at 1:00 pm

I watch a lot of TV so I know that Orly and Barrack will fall in love at the end.

ChurchofRealism February 6, 2012 at 1:44 pm

It's twue, it's twue. Orly is our generations Lili von Schtupp.

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:19 pm

No, that's the Talibunny.

YouBetcha February 6, 2012 at 1:00 pm

Orly, the "M" stands for "Muhammad". All your worst fears just came true.

spinozasgod February 6, 2012 at 1:01 pm

the M is for Muslin…..

chicken_thief February 6, 2012 at 1:01 pm

Nothing says "professional" like a gmail account in lieu of a domain name.

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Her website is chock-full of malware. Don't click on it!

deanbooth February 6, 2012 at 6:13 pm

I needed a real estate lawyer last month, and I thought it might be a bad sign when I noticed the guy had an AOL email account. It was: besides his general incompetence, we actually got Viagra spam from his email address. True story!

Baconzgood February 6, 2012 at 1:01 pm

The "M" stands for Murder?

ManchuCandidate February 6, 2012 at 1:02 pm

M is for Moran.

Tundra Grifter February 6, 2012 at 1:01 pm

Orly – never go full r-word. Ever.

Baconzgood February 6, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Man….That's one ugly fuckin' dude.

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:21 pm

The legend here in CA is that a guy dressed up as her actually took the bar exam so she could get a license.

angerbear February 6, 2012 at 1:02 pm

If you put ten baboons in a room with ten typewriters, made them each drink a Red Bull Slurpee and then rigged the typewriters so that certain keystrokes would fire a Taser dart at one of the other baboons… Orly Taitz wouldn't have to write her own legal appeals.

KeepFnThatChicken February 6, 2012 at 1:09 pm

Typewriter?

widestanceshakedown February 6, 2012 at 1:20 pm

It's something people used to spit coffee into while reading letters.

nonbeliever7 February 6, 2012 at 1:47 pm

Beautiful. I nearly spit up all over my abacus.

KeepFnThatChicken February 6, 2012 at 2:19 pm

I spilled my ink reservoir all over this crinkly paper, and knocked over my drying sand (or whatever that junk is).

bagofmice February 6, 2012 at 1:27 pm

Oh Snap! Snap snap snap, snap snap. Ka-ching!
snap snap snap snap snap snap chunk, snap snap.

donner_froh February 6, 2012 at 1:17 pm

A perfect summing up of Orly's style.

OneYieldRegular February 6, 2012 at 1:03 pm

As the world turns. Wasn't Malihi Orly's BFF a couple of weeks ago when he agreed to entertain her complaint (clearly out of desperation to get away from her shrill harping)? And isn't it way past time for the white van and the orderlies with a strait-jacket to arrive?

Mumbletypeg February 6, 2012 at 1:03 pm

Can't help but feel for the freak, a little. The sound of the maggots devouring one's brain matter must be deafening.

Chet Kincaid February 6, 2012 at 2:50 pm

And it goes a little something like this…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zqrhgv8xAEI

KeepFnThatChicken February 6, 2012 at 1:03 pm

Orly, you're just another reason why __________________ are horrible people.

(dentists, lawyers, the malevolently ignorant, eurotrash, Gabor sisters, Dolly Parton lookalikes)

Fare la Volpe February 6, 2012 at 2:23 pm

ZsaZsa Libel!!

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:22 pm

Orange Countians.

SexySmurf February 6, 2012 at 1:05 pm

Confidential to Orly Taitz: It's not good for your law practice to announce publicly you lost a case to an inanimate object.

weej_bain February 6, 2012 at 1:06 pm

Since Dr. Oily Titz is a dentist, would it be too much to get her fitted with a permanent mouth guard?

EatsBabyDingos February 6, 2012 at 1:07 pm

That picture reminds me why I do not drink a quart of vodka before I go to bars. I've already chewed off both my arms.

prommie February 6, 2012 at 1:08 pm

I see that Orly's "Tara" had pink-ish drapes.

VinnyThePooh February 6, 2012 at 1:14 pm

She used the rod for other purposes.

ElPinche February 6, 2012 at 1:09 pm

Go back to Russia , commie!!11!!

neiltheblaze February 6, 2012 at 1:09 pm

If only Orly knew how much the field of dentistry misses her.

Steverino247 February 6, 2012 at 1:10 pm

You know, it's pretty pathetic to lose to an empty chair. The funny part is that they would have won the case if they had just shut up and let the judge rule. But nooooo. They wanted to win on the merits so they went ahead and presented testimony and documents for the Court. The Court would have ruled for them by default, but when they demanded to present their case, the Court was able to rule against them on the points of law ignored by Taintz.

Somewhere in the world, Orly Taitz is sobbing and slapping herself, saying, "I'm the plaintiff. I'm the lawyer. I'm the plaintiff and the lawyer."

ManchuCandidate February 6, 2012 at 1:12 pm

That's what happens when you have a fool for a lawyer.

Biff February 6, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Forget it, Jake…

Goonemeritus February 6, 2012 at 1:10 pm

Loosing to an empty chair will not look good to all her other high profile clients. Well at least she always has biting the heads of chickens at state fairs to fall back on.

bagofmice February 6, 2012 at 1:35 pm

Losing to a typo would loosen her up.

soeoho February 6, 2012 at 1:10 pm

All together now!
Taitz so, honey Taitz so, Orly says yes but the Lord says no, Taitz so…….honey Taitz sooo.

chicken_thief February 6, 2012 at 1:11 pm

Is Orly Jerome Corsi in drag or vice versa?

Chillwillard February 6, 2012 at 1:11 pm

Has anyone ever mentioned that she looks like Lady GaGa in drag?

sharethegrief February 6, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Someone tell Orly that Obama is a STANDING President. If he were sitting there wouldn't be an empty chair.

bagofmice February 6, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Is this a Taitz named sue?

Generation[redacted] February 6, 2012 at 1:14 pm

How can she be sure that Obama even exists?

dijetlo February 6, 2012 at 1:16 pm

It was a sad day when Reagan closed the mental hospitals to all but the suicidal and criminally insane, thus dooming the mentally ill to lives of endless litigiousness and intermittent dentistry.

Barrelhse February 6, 2012 at 1:18 pm

Suddenly, she was run over by a truck. -the end-

Oblios_Cap February 6, 2012 at 1:19 pm

No “probative value”! Likewise Orly Titz.

I hear ya, man. Normally I like the crazies, but Orly defintely is lacking any sort of probative possibilities.

Oblios_Cap February 6, 2012 at 1:21 pm

Malihi?! No wonder O'bama won. His daughter was the judge.

SorosBot February 6, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Someone please put this woman back on her meds.

Barrelhse February 6, 2012 at 1:24 pm

OT- but, when is it OK to start with the Barbara jokes?
Don't wanna be too soon.

Limeylizzie February 6, 2012 at 4:07 pm

As in "Barb's old uterus has more sense than Orly Taitz"?

Barrelhse February 6, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Do you suppose she'll keep it in a jar?

barto February 6, 2012 at 1:24 pm

This wasn't covered very well but apparently the empty chair presented a much tighter legal case than Ms. Taitz, hence the unfavorable ruling. She might consider hiring a more competent legal team, I'm thinking. That and maybe get some therapy.

soeoho February 6, 2012 at 1:46 pm

The empty chair did a fine job but I believe our average stools would have been an equitable challange.

Barrelhse February 6, 2012 at 5:14 pm

Very much like Barney Frank's dining room table.

UnholyMoses February 6, 2012 at 1:25 pm

That woman should be arrested immediately for Flagrant and Foul Use of Commas.

And because she's certifiably fucking insane. Just … wowza. Lots of crazy in such a small package.

kissawookiee February 6, 2012 at 1:26 pm

MICHAEL M. MALIHI. WHAT DOES M STAND FOR?!!??

If it doesn't already stand for MMMMMM BITCH BE CRAZY, it will just as soon as he can get the paperwork notarized and filed.

sarah_connor February 6, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Just wait, sheeple, the Kenyan overloards are coming! Bringing with them a delicious supply of aa coffee, I hope.

VinnyThePooh February 6, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Orly took an oath to be a cunt, a whole cunt, and nothing but a cunt.

Dashboard Buddha February 6, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Orly? M mean Mind Your Fucking Business you dense, bugfuck crazy twit.

blitzgal February 6, 2012 at 1:36 pm

If Obama is not a natural born citizen despite being born in this country, then Mitt Romney is also not a natural born citizen, as George Romney was born in a Mormon camp in Mexico and didn't come to the United States until his family fled the Mexican Revolution.

JustPixelz February 6, 2012 at 1:47 pm

Wait'll she gets a gander at Mitt Romney's Mexican father's birth certificate written in the spanglish lingo. And does she know Newt Gingrich was adopted?!?? Orly: You must stop them.

Chet Kincaid February 6, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Truly, she is the Jim Garrison of our time!! Who will play Orly in the hagiographical, Oliver-Stone-esque film of these historic, heroic events, "BHO"? Can Victoria Jackson be Jenny Craiged into suitable shape? And what about the rest of the cast?

chicken_thief February 6, 2012 at 1:57 pm

I'm thinking Dustin Hoffman in his "Tootsie" role.

Chet Kincaid February 6, 2012 at 1:58 pm

hahaha

starfanglednut February 6, 2012 at 2:42 pm

Perfect!

BZ1 February 6, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Oily apparently has her brain on caps lock permanently

glamourdammerung February 6, 2012 at 1:57 pm

You mean Taitz is completely delusional? Who would have guessed besides, well, everyone with an IQ high enough to not be a birther.

lulzmonger February 6, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Orly Taitz: wetter, hotter, tighter, hornier … & of little probative value.

plinthic February 6, 2012 at 1:58 pm

You know, I hired her to represent me in my foreclosure. Am I making a mistake?

L188188 February 6, 2012 at 2:03 pm

Oh sure, you can CALL her crazy. But she's crazy like a crazy person.

rickmaci February 6, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Talk about repeated abuse of process!!! Why does this hideous person still have a license to practice law? Are there no professional rules governing California lawyers to stop her? Her conduct is a disgrace.

chicken_thief February 6, 2012 at 2:20 pm

She was sanctioned once to the tune of $20,000 if I recall correctly.

BerkeleyBear February 6, 2012 at 4:30 pm

She's been under investigation in California for years, but just filing frivolous crap doesn't normally get you disbarred – the sanctions the court can hit you with are supposed to bring you in line. Typically disbarred attorneys have stolen from their clients, gotten popped for criminal behavior, ignored their clients or otherwise demonstrated fucked up ethics, not just fucked up brains. But she's trying hard to convince the state bar to make an exception in her case.

Manhattan123 February 6, 2012 at 2:34 pm

What does the M stand for? Fuck you, that's my name.

owhatever February 6, 2012 at 2:39 pm

I still like Oily Titz. Not her, just her name.

meatlofer February 6, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Come on Wonkette! It's a full moon,retards are supposed to be a little off.

Ramon X February 6, 2012 at 2:48 pm

“The only thing Obama provided, was an empty chair."

Wait. So, Obama actually sent a fricken chair???

This shit's just gettin too weird for me.

Biff February 6, 2012 at 2:50 pm

In the deep south, initials are legitimate names.

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 2:50 pm

If Mr. Obama sends a representative, they scream that he's spending millions and millions of dollars trying to keep the truth from the public.

Just like the idiots who believe in chemtrails, they insist on having it both ways.

Steverino247 February 6, 2012 at 3:01 pm

Happy chemtrails to you…
…until we meet again.

MRjonz February 6, 2012 at 3:01 pm

Orly the Loony (with apologies to Roy Orbison)

Orly the loony
(Dum dum dum, dumdy doo wah)
Knows the president ain’t right
(Oy vey, yea, yea, yea)
Orly the loony
(Dum dum dum, dumdy doo wah)
Knows that she must wage this fight
(Dum dum dum, dummy doo wah)

Those Kenyan Birth Papers, she bought were all fakes
But she’ll keep on babbling, just as long as it takes
And Orly the loony, continues to cry
Orly the loony
(Dum dum dum, dumdy doo wa-a-a-ah)

CessnaDriver February 6, 2012 at 3:02 pm

DON'T click on Orly's website!

It's full of viruses and malware!

If you want to see her crap, find a mirror site.

Wonkette should delete that link!

Nostrildamus February 6, 2012 at 3:23 pm

Orly, Bammerz has taken shits that are smarter than you.

beavertank February 6, 2012 at 3:47 pm

Is it just me, or does the text of that appeals brief become progressively smaller and smaller point as it goes? Almost as if the writer is slowly running out of air because they keep shouting so fast…

fuflans February 6, 2012 at 3:48 pm

the republicans should take a look at this 'empty chair' fellow. might be just the ticket for 2012.

PhilippePetain February 6, 2012 at 4:01 pm

Further down the blog, Orly apparently thought highly enough of the following comment on her blog to repost as a headline:

Coincidence… 1] hussein dunham meets secretly with supreme court 2] law clerk hired for judge carter shortly before Orly hearing 3] eric holder apparently seen entering judge land court house before hearing 4] Orly hawaiian hearing changed from before hussein’s arrival to after hussein leaves hawaii 5] Iranian valerie jarrett speaks in ATLANTA shortly before the iranian judge malihi hearing in Atlanta….hmmmm????

It is simply amazing that the American judicial system will put up with madness of this caliber repeatedly. Can't she be made to pay for the court costs of these cases or something? I think I'm starting to understand the Republicans who think their taxes are funding abortions.

ShaveTheWhales February 6, 2012 at 4:16 pm

Okay, which Wonketeer wrote this comment? Upfisty for "Iranian valerie jarret". 'Fess up, now.

PhilippePetain February 6, 2012 at 4:24 pm

I was thinking the same thing but this was before the linked article, so someone either has to be reading that blog regularly or….okay, you got me, that's not really a stretch for us masochists.

Troglodeity February 6, 2012 at 4:02 pm

"Despite the Defendant's failure to appear, Plaintiffs asked this Court to decide the case on the merits of their arguments and evidence. The Court granted Plaintiffs' request."

ROFLMAO! Only the great Orly Taitz, Esquire could turn a GUARANTEED DEFAULT JUDGMENT in her favor into a loss on the merits of the case. What a dipshit.

"Ms. Taitz attempted to solicit expert testimony from several of the witnesses without qualifying or tendering the witnesses as experts."

ROFLMAO again! Even a first-year law student knows that experts need to be "tendered" (i.e., presented) to the court as experts in their field: which should be pretty easy to do WHEN THERE'S NO OPPOSING PARTY IN THE COURTROOM TO OBJECT! All she had to do was ask them a few leading questions. Un-frickin'-believable.

Seriously: Orly Taitz's wingnut clients should be turning their wrath on her and demanding their monetary support back – and suing her for malpractice if she refuses. And she should be censured, suspended or disbarred: not for her peculiar beliefs but just for her abysmally, horribly, outrageously bad lawyering.

Limeylizzie February 6, 2012 at 4:11 pm

For Orlybots this site is fantastique!
http://www.coachisright.com/if-obama-has-no-natur

Troglodeity February 6, 2012 at 4:13 pm

It's ironic that someone claiming that copies are unreliable would write (on p. 23 of her appeal): "As some of the exhibits in the Court Case File were not clear due to scanning,clear copies were added."

Barrelhse February 6, 2012 at 5:17 pm

The "M" is for MUSLIN, bitch. And I'm goin' Sharia Law all over your ass!

Tommy1733 February 6, 2012 at 5:28 pm

I'm a little concerned that his Mom is named "Stanley". This apparent same-sex-marriage which somehow resulted in a child indicates some much more serious issues.

Tommy1733 February 6, 2012 at 5:30 pm

Please, Wonketeers, DO NOT attempt to read this document in its entirety, as it will result in BRAIN FREEZE.

I think we need to send flowers and chocolates to Brian Kemp, Secretary of State of Georgia, as he may be suffering long-term damage from having to endure that dumbness.

Thedongsofwar February 6, 2012 at 6:19 pm

"What's the emergency? THERE'S A BLACK GUY IN THE WHITEHOUSE! HE"S HAD IT FOR THREE AND A HALF YEARS!!!!"

Arken February 6, 2012 at 8:52 pm

David Farrar, the Farrar named in the case above, used to be a regular at Talking Points Memo and, if you'll believe it, he's even nuttier than Taitz. Every time he posted anything, it was hilariously stupid. He actually believed that no one is eligible to run for president unless both of their PARENTS were born in the U.S. whether they were born here or not. He's also one of those Sovereign Citizen nuts.

MittBorg February 6, 2012 at 9:42 pm

Mohammed, obvy. God, she's stupid.

personalrob February 7, 2012 at 1:52 am

All the lithium carbonate on earth would be just a speed bump in her manic episode

baghdadroz February 7, 2012 at 12:48 pm

When is Oily Taters going to collect her marbles and leave the playground? The ones that fell out of her head?

kwdavids February 7, 2012 at 11:04 pm

I think the font is "Algerian," the same font on Secretary Kemp's office door. ;)

12X34X February 11, 2012 at 9:19 am

She's not talking about the Constitution. She's talking about the constipation.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: