nation of spenditnows

Pete Hoekstra Would Like You To Know That Asians Talk Funny

Irani Twitter freedom fighter Rep. Pete Hoekstra of Michigan is running for Senate now and goddamnit he will win, after producing this comically racist ad about the job-stealing Asian clown ladies who talk funny and hope you die of unemployment.

Look at this Asian gal riding her bike through a burnt-over hellscape of plants and cocaine, directing her trash talk towards The Occident. She thanks Michigan Sen. Debbie “SpendItNow” for her fancy Asia job and then speaks some broken English: “Your economy get very weak. Ours get very good. We take your jobs. Thank you, Debbie Spenditnow.” Why hasn’t a robot death bird taken either of these people out yet?

And hooray, there’s a companion racist website dedicated just to this racist ad:

This is offensive. The universal bad political play on Debbie Stabenow’s name is “Debbie StabMeNow” and Pete Hoekstra should resign and go to Gitmo forever, along with this sassy bike lady, for coming up with something even lamer.

About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell
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    1. YasserArraFeck

      "We love you looooooonnngggg time" = Rethug campaign-speak
      "We fuck you ceaselessly" = Rethug govern-speak

  1. memzilla

    Hey Pete Joke-stra: Anonymous and Lulzsec will be hacking your emails now, you racist piece of dung.

    The hypocrisy of a Rethuglican making hateful racist jokes about our Asian competitors, while at the same time supporting legislation to offshore American jerbs to Asia on behalf of their One Percent Masters — and killing legislation to help educate American workers so as to make them more globally competitive — is stunning, but not surprising.

      1. jakegittes

        Who needs a car when you're chained to your work station and you're not allowed to leave the factory prison?

    1. comrad_darkness

      Because their economy is going so well, the inflations has made it impossibrul to buy foods. Also, house prices sky high and traffic jams last for 15 days fucking straight.

      You know that wasn't filmed in China because the sky wasn't a purple puke brown with smog.

    1. SorosBot

      The right-wing does love their self-hating minority talking heads, who give cover for the racism they want to openly display but know they can't get away with. And Malkin's a twofer, since she is also a woman who hates other ladies.

  2. SorosBot

    Now I know actors can be desperate for work, but really that actress should be ashamed of herself. And how how do you think Hoekstra will react – a defiant, "how dare you suggest my racist ad was racist!" or a classic non-apology apology of "I'm sorry if you were offended."?

    1. Generation[redacted]

      I admire her work. It's a delicate balance to be stereotypical enough to sink the guy's career, while not so over-the-top that they choose another actress. Notice the straw hat behind her head, not on top, and how she judiciously chose to not use the fake teeth. The broken English in a midwestern accent? Spot on. You want the dog whistle, but you don't want to go full Mickey Rooney ala Breakfast at Tiffany's.

      She can look forward to a good future selling quack medicine in late night infomercials.

    2. comrad_darkness

      He'll fall back on that republican standard of: "you're the racist one for seeing the racism in it."

      1. One_Man_Band

        If you look on his Facebook page, this is already happening. He is also deleting any comments that call him out on this bullshit.

  3. Rosie_Scenario

    I can't wait for Stephen Colber to mock this with his Ching Chong Ding Dong character. Too bad, the show is on break this week.

  4. Ducksworthy

    So, der Peter is in favor of tax breaks for moving jerbs to Asia, right? Or is that just for sex slaves in the Marianas?

  5. Toomush_Infer

    Jokestraw – our Michigan answer to Minnesota and Wisconsin….and you thought we weren't competitive – it's halftime, baby!…

    1. horsedreamer_1

      Sadly, I have family in the Mitten that will vote for Hoekstra. Because Stabenow, like John Kerry, is "the Devil".

  6. Dashboard Buddha

    Gah…this asshole and the people that fall for the ad make my fucking head explode. Who's fault is it that our jobs went overseas? Hmmmm, let's see. Reagan made it easier for companies to go offshore and as they did, people lost their jobs. Living now on reduced income, they turn to the Walmarts to buy stuff. Walmart bullies manufacturers into cutting costs forcing them to locate overseas thus pushing people even further down the income ladder. Lather.Rinse.Repeat.

    I hate them all.

  7. Tundra Grifter

    Just what jobs does Pete think are moving to Asia? That young lady is riding her bike next to a rice paddy.

    Not to mention I'm missing the connection between Asians purchasing US government debt and jobs shifting overseas…

  8. jakegittes

    Hoekstra's pissed because he specifically asked that the song "We are Siamese" from Lady and the Tramp be playing in the background and that the ad end with a big gong clash after her lines.

    1. Tundra Grifter

      Or the not exactly pc ending "Everybody Wants to Be A Cat" to The Aristocats (the Disney cartoon, not the documentary about comics).

      A bucktoothed, round glasses-wearing Siamese cat playing the piano with chopstix and unable to pronounce "r' is somewhat stereotypical.

  9. JustPixelz

    Pete "spend it not". Ha ha. I'll bet when Dubya wanted some unfunded wars this asshat didn't mind borrowing and spending a few trillion bucks from China. WAIT … I think I figured it out! When white POTUS borrows from China for war on brown people, it's numbah 1. When blah POTUS borrows from China to help Americans in Michigan, it's numbah 10.

  10. chascates

    It's not racism if you're making fun of furriners: it's patriotism!

    Seriously, didn't Pete Hoekstra get brain injuries when he was a lineman for the Detroit Lions?

  11. BarackMyWorld

    It really should be pointed out that outsourcing manufacturing jobs to Asia doesn't have anything to do with federal deficit spending.

    So not only is the advertisement racist, but it ignores basic knowledge of macroeconomics.

    1. Generation[redacted]

      Yes, but is the advertisement racist enough to distract from basic realities of macroeconomics? That's the true measure of success.

    2. pdiddycornchips

      Wingnuts and the doofus army that votes for them don't do economics. I mean they do but only in their fantasy world where all things negative are someone else's fault and tax cuts for rich people magically fixes it.

    1. SorosBot

      Speak for yourself; with the sound off to avoid the racist broken English, I find her rather fap-worthy.

    2. PsycWench

      OT only a couple of weeks ago my husband explained that phrase to me. For some reason I had made it to 51 years of age without figuring out what "turning Japanese" referred to.

      1. MissTaken

        When I was little I would run around singing the song completely oblivious to the meaning. I should ask my mom why she allowed that to happen.

        I would also sing I Touch Roses from Book of Love. Hmm.

  12. paris biltong

    Wait till he releases his commercial opposing foreign aid to African countries, it's a riot with Sambos galore!

  13. Data Exactly

    What braindead idiot spent good money airing it during the Super Bowl for all to refrain from the insipid sports spectacle for a moment to laugh their asses off at how crappy this comercial is?!? I mean, c'mon, it costs millions of now-Chinese dollars to air during the Super Bowl – and for this?!?

  14. WhatTheHeck

    Is Pete also telling his constituents to have only three children, because every fourth child born in the world today is Chinese?

  15. Toomush_Infer

    Okay, on second thought I'm confused….is it Japan or China…the rice paddy could be either, but the fan says Japan, while China….? Where's Charlie Chan when you need him…?

    1. Neoyorquino

      To be honest, Asian Lady did not stir my patriotism one iota. My loins, however . . . (Hmm. "Loins". I so seldom have the opportunity to use that word in a sentence).

    1. bagofmice

      He likes big Wangs and he cannot lie, you other Dongs can't deny.
      When a Peter walks in with a grin on his chin and Santorum on his face
      you get Hoek'd!!!

      We tried to YouTube stuff! But that stuff was rough! // (kinda weak, I know)

      My consultants tried to warn me, but that ad we got…

      (last line implied)

  16. freakishlywrong

    Jesus, and a racist, pack O' lies site to bilge this shit out. Oh, and "SpendItNow" is stupid, and, typically, not funny.

  17. prommie

    The jerbs went overseas because Bush I, Clinton, and Bush II dedicated themselves to removing all the "barrifs and terriers" in the name of free trade and the new global economy, which is a great economy for the finance industry, but for people who work for a living, not so much.

    1. GOPCrusher

      Amazing that during this election cycle, the Republiklans are concerned about jobs going to Asia, when they spent the last 30 years telling Americans that it was Globalization and it is good.

  18. Callyson

    And yes, this clown *did* vote for the Wall Street bailouts.
    Spend – it – not…NOT!
    (God, didn't the "not" go out with the 90's?)

    1. natoslug

      "Not!" lives on, at least in young furriners. My sweetly vicious Italian daughter has been home for a month and uses it constantly. At least it's cute in an Italian accent.

  19. PuckStopsHere

    Since is target audience is, like Hoekstra, stupid, I think this stupid ad is spot on. Keep bringing the dumbass, Pete. Keep bringing it.

  20. An_Outhouse

    Asians Do talk funny. And what's with the vitamin deficiency yellow complexion? Eat something besides rice!

  21. ThundercatHo

    So, the ginger guy is back 1 day and commenting on the Rmoney post has been disabled already?! Ok, which one of you guys used the "R" word?

  22. proudgrampa

    I guess the question is: who is more cretinous? The congressman who presumably "approved" this ad, or the voters who put him into office in the first place?

    1. Dashboard Buddha

      I once saw Cormac McCarthy in concert once and he said the average Amercian could be eating a cheeseburger while sitting on the back of a cow and not make the connection.

    2. bagofmice

      I'm Pete Hoekstra, and the two decade long foreign wars that failed to catch Osama but cost trillions of dollars and thousands of American lives approve of this message.

    3. Negropolis

      Fortunately, he won't be getting back into office. He was the lord of a hyper-conservative West Michigan congressional district, and that is as high as he ever rose and will ever rise. He tried to run for governor and was rejected in the GOP primary for amoral, non-political Rick Snyder.

  23. prommie

    The good news is, Its Halftime in America, and these chinamen don't know nothing about football! Clint Rockne for President!

  24. Beowoof

    When does Wall Street get its justifiable credit for sending American jobs to China? When go guys like Mitt Romney get the credit for the shit they pulled? Are Americans really willing to be continue to be that ignorant? Oh that last question just answered itself. Nevermind.

  25. johnnyzhivago

    Yellow Peril Strikes Again!!! But isn't that more of a Japanese-ish font on the website. I guess it's like Muslims – Sunni or Shiite – Japanese or Chinese – does it matter???

  26. mrsbitch

    Oh you guys, stop it right now. As a Michigander from Peepee's district, I can tell you now that when he was in office, the economy boomed — BOOMED I say! There were jobs all over the place. They littered the streets! All you had to do was step outside and take one. And they were GOOD jobs. Jobs with union protection and health insurance bennies and pay you could actually live on! It was wondrous. /rampaging snark

    Peepee's an AoGP.

    In cheerier and much more important news, I see my Intense Debate points are back.

    1. Blueb4sunrise

      Was just thinking similarly. Imagine Layne repeatedly enabling comments, then Newell disabling,……. to infinity.

    2. bagofmice

      Intense Debate appears to be having synchronization issues. I would guess that the web service handling the page serving is having a bad day talking to the database storing the comments, meaning that things get written to the database, but the webservice never hears back and assumes a failure on the write operation, causing double posts and possibly configuration issues. This is pure conjecture of course, but it is the conjecture of a distributed app developer.

    1. SorosBot

      I want to know how she ended up speaking such broken English with the clear accent of a native English speaker.

  27. chicken_thief

    I can't wait to hear Rush hammer Hoekstra over this ad. Of course, Rush doesn't give a shit about the racism, etc, but will go ape shit that Hoekstra didn't use a Thai boy in the starring role.

  28. ph7

    But Hoekstra said the ad, which was filmed in California and featured an actress whose parents are 100% Chinese, was only insensitive to Debbie Stabenow. “The Chinese benefit from the recklessness of U.S. spending. It doesn’t criticize the Chinese at all,” he said

    Buckwheat's parents were 100% black, therefore his Little Rascals episodes filmed in California weren't offensive to blacks, either.

    1. SilverTsunami

      See, it was filmed in Sacramento rice paddies! And Lisa Chan, the "actress" is Miss Napa County of 2012. Remember that the next time you go to buy an expensive bottle of wine.

  29. Magister

    I haven't heard it pronounced “SpendItNow”. Don't agree with him politically, but coupled with the above ad, it could be a brilliant play for the barbershop and talk radio crowd. Though I don't know, even if the pronunciation were to enter the district's consciousness, it'll actually garner him more votes.

  30. ttommyunger

    One thing this asshat is good for: having trouble bring up that loogie? Say "Pete Hoekstra" three times fast. ..Pete Hoekstra, the Republican Triple-Threat: Ugly, Dumb AND Racist.

  31. illnoise

    I filed a complaint with YouTube that it was racist hate speech (because it is!). If it makes you mad, please go do the same.

  32. spinozasgod

    remember when the right at least tried to be subtle? I miss the days of dog whistling….good times….

  33. valthemus

    You all are so insensitive! All those frightened white people in Michigan and there's poor Petey Hoekstra, bravely and single-handedly fighting back the invading Mongol hordes with their bicycles and their woven hats an' foreign-ness an' stuff. And you know how those right-wingers love a good racist! Who are you to mock and deprive them? Shame on all y'alls!

  34. MiniMencken

    I have here in my hand right now a file on Piet Hoekstra. He is a card-carrying member of the Greater Niederlander Party and takes his orders directly from Princess Margriet von Oranien-Nassau and the rest of her gang of Paleis Soestdijk criminals! Piet is in hock up to his orange-colored ass to Big Tulip and wears wooden shoes when he is at home. He is a sucker on the tentacle of the Dutch octopus, feeling its irredentist way across the bottom of the Atlantic towards Nieuw Amsterdam and the Henrik Hudson River valley! Wake up, America!

  35. glamourdammerung

    Also, who cares what a racist foreigner thinks? Other than the GOP/Republicans/teabaggers/whatever they changed their name to in order to avoid being linked to their repeated failures/etc.?

  36. glamourdammerung

    And I will apologize to any Dutch folks for my initial comment of "that dirty tulip fucker" when I first saw this ad. Though if you all want to take him back, that would be really cool of you.

  37. BZ1

    Where do you even start at the offensive scale- probably at minus a zillion, what a cretin to release an ad like that…

  38. Tundra Grifter

    While defending his dumb commercial, Pete Hoekstra refered to the Senator as "Debbie."

    So he's sexist and a racist?

  39. owhatever

    Pete can count on the Union, Hispanic, Gay, Poor, Unemployed and now the Asian vote. Anyone out there who has not yet been offended need only to wait a little while.

  40. comrad_darkness

    Hoekstra in the original Dutch means something like people who live at the bend in the road above the swamps.

    He should visit the homeland sometime. Amsterdam would give him a heart attack.

  41. comrad_darkness

    Debbie Spenditnow would like to provide our state with stimulus money so that you get a paycheck. While I, Pete Saveitnowforthenextchancetobombthebrownchildren would like your heat turned off because your ceo really really needs to make 500x your salary or he'll have a sad.

  42. Negligently_Joe

    So the Hoekstra campaign is pushing back and saying that this ad is "definitely not" offensive to Asians. Being only the Wrong Kind of Asian, I really just have to take their word for it, at least until I have a chance to ask my best friend, who is a Professional Asian. (I'd ask my girlfriend, but she's just a part-time Asian)

  43. pdiddycornchips

    There is only one way to prevent all of our jobs from riding away on bicycles and that's tax cuts for rich assholes.

  44. Fukui_sanYesOta

    Pete Hoekstra just tweeted: "People don't like my ad. Now I know how Leni Riefenstahl felt."

    1. SilverTsunami

      It's implausible that Hoekstra would know who Reifenstahl was (but kudos, excellent historical reference!)

  45. a_pink_poodle

    Hahaha, fuck you Pete Noekstra. You didn't need to have her speak in broken English nor even use Asia as a scape goat.

  46. Come here a minute

    More gong! The only thing that would improve this ad for actual Republican Senate candidate and current U.S. Rep. Pete Hoekstra is more gong.

  47. BarackMyWorld

    Chris Hayes did a really good job substantively debunking this ad on "The Rachel Maddow Show" tonight.

  48. DahBoner

    "We take your jobs."

    And robots will take yours, sooner than you think.

    Foxconn, which makes half of all consumer electronics in the world, has plans to replace some of it's workers with one million robots, within 3 years…

  49. Soylent Green

    How much did it cost to fly a team to China, hire a hooker on a bicycle and shill out this commercial during Super Bowl air time?

  50. Negropolis

    I'll forgive this California girl for selling her dignity for money if she promises to "love me long time."

    This is why Hoekstra is so far behind in the polls. Senator Debbie Spenditnow is drinking your milkshake, Pete.

    BTW, Pete is a native Dutchman. Someone needz to ask him and his parents for their citizenship papers.

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