MUPPETS VS. MUPPETS  2:05 pm January 30, 2012

Muppets Kermit & Miss Piggy Respond To Charges By Fox News Muppets

by Wonkette Jr.

It is important that you watch this crucial Fox News Business report on the evil of the beloved Muppets, even if you already saw this clip in December. Why? Because the Muppets have finally responded to these treasonous charges, at a press conference — Miss Piggy even did a SMACKDOWN on the Fox News idiots. It’s a good thing Fox News viewers are all 67-year-old white trash sitting in their soon-to-be repo’d double-wides, because otherwise they would probably stop buying Muppet toys and movies!

Here, from some fancy hotel meeting room, is the press conference from Thursday:

 
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{ 134 comments }

UnholyMoses January 30, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Your move, Fraggle Rock …

Extemporanus January 30, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Today, we are all Doozers.

MrFizzy January 30, 2012 at 2:09 pm

I would so totally love to put my fist up Meghan Kelly's ass and make her talk in a squeaky voice.

Baconzgood January 30, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Is their room enough for a fist up there? I mean, her head is pretty big.

NewtsChicknNeck January 30, 2012 at 2:25 pm

sadly, among the righties, it's mostly just limbaugh and his ilk offering to let someone–anyone–do that. see also, Hicks, Bill, Rant in E Minor (recorded in 1992-93) but describing limbaugh to a tee. true then, true 20 years later. RIP, Bill.

p.s. that record is absolutely fucking amazing in its prescience and (sadly) maintained relevance. you'd think we would've gotten over and long forgotten all the scat-munchers that bothered Hicks back when Clinton was just a lovable still somewhat lefty rabble-rouser and Pres.O was a 2nd year lawyer.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 30, 2012 at 3:11 pm

Bill O'Reilly beat you to it.

40 or 50 % McShineys January 30, 2012 at 4:36 pm

It was bloodhound-impersonator Brit Hume, according the rumors.

Yech.

Designer_Rants January 30, 2012 at 10:58 pm
MrFizzy January 31, 2012 at 10:28 am

Sock fistery

mormos January 30, 2012 at 2:09 pm

winsauce, it is delicious.

SorosBot January 30, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Fox messed with the wrong pig.

Fare la Volpe January 30, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Tonight on Fox: Pigs – Are they coming for your children?

Maman January 30, 2012 at 2:29 pm

I won't be surprised to hear it.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 30, 2012 at 3:12 pm

Pigs: The Islamic Terrorist Best Friend. Only on FOX!

smokefilledroommate January 30, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Pigs: Possible Ties to Saul Alinsky and the Radical Socialist Left?

Sparky MacGyver January 30, 2012 at 9:19 pm

A bit off topic, but… Newt Gingrich goes on about "Saul Alinsky", who died before "The Six Million Dollar Man" came on the air… and he calls people like ME "elites" who are "out of touch"???

heathenette January 31, 2012 at 10:20 am

Who the hell is Saul Alinsky?

FlownOver January 30, 2012 at 2:11 pm

Log Cabin Bert and Ernie are yet to be heard from.

starfanglednut January 30, 2012 at 6:23 pm

Teh winz.

larryfinexx January 30, 2012 at 2:12 pm

I'd like to get a Miss Piggy puppet for my left hand.

savethispatient January 30, 2012 at 2:12 pm

Of course the difference between a Fox News anchor and a Muppet is that one is a puppet who says whatever their handler wants, no matter how ridiculous or factually incorrect… and the other is a Muppet.

savethispatient January 30, 2012 at 2:19 pm

PS: WOKKA WOKKA WOKKA!

Biel_ze_Bubba January 30, 2012 at 4:50 pm

Or, as put by the best YouTube comment in years:

The difference between The Muppets and FOX News is that one has an unseen hand up their´╗┐ ass putting words in their mouths that make normal people laugh all the time, and the other has Kermit and Miss Piggy.

donner_froh January 30, 2012 at 2:12 pm

Nice touch of the shadow looming behind Kermit during his delivery. Must be an implicit endorsement of Sharia Law in Oklahoma.

comrad_darkness January 30, 2012 at 2:12 pm

My god, the puppets are smarter than the news media.

Nothingisamiss January 30, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Now with video.

GOPCrusher January 30, 2012 at 4:22 pm

You know your life has taken a turn for the worst when you are dissed by a puppet. And it has more credibility.

DaRooster January 30, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Talking frogs are science… and you know about that science stuff.

comrad_darkness January 30, 2012 at 2:13 pm

I would love to see Miss Piggy doing a Haiiiiya! on Gretta van Susteren.

MrFizzy January 30, 2012 at 2:22 pm

I don't want to see anything doing anything on or near GVS.

YasserArraFeck January 30, 2012 at 2:36 pm

Looks like Gretta has already taken a few Haiiiiya!s to the face

philpjfry January 30, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Maybe the muppets should pick on somebody at least as smart as they are. No fair picking on the Terminaly stupid. Fuck you fox news fuck you all to hell

JustPixelz January 30, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Hello? Muppets are made of felt and ping-pong balls. While Fox is made of … OH WAIT … never mind.

nounverb911 January 30, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Megan Kelly kissed a muppet frog when she was a kid and look what she turned into.

actor212 January 30, 2012 at 2:23 pm

In Kelly's defense, the local pedophile put Kermit in his lap

edgydrifter January 30, 2012 at 2:14 pm

I've always suspected Rupert Murdoch might be a plucked skeksis.

WhatTheHolyHeck January 30, 2012 at 5:06 pm

Bill O'Reilly IS Fizzgig.

Baconzgood January 30, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh.

CivicHoliday January 30, 2012 at 3:13 pm

that was one of my favorite parts of the new movie

BarackMyWorld January 30, 2012 at 2:15 pm

I can't wait for the investigative report on Jim Henson's ties to Saul Alinsky.

Fukui_sanYesOta January 30, 2012 at 2:25 pm

from the crawl:

"OCCUPY" PUPPETS: TIES TO 9/11?

nounverb911 January 30, 2012 at 2:35 pm

Well for a start, they're both dead.

ShaveTheWhales January 30, 2012 at 7:04 pm

CONSPIRACY!!!!!

Puffperney January 30, 2012 at 3:12 pm

Muppets! Threat to America or menace to our way of life?

MOG2410 January 30, 2012 at 3:23 pm

uh, yeah. Pork Rinds, anyone?

GOPCrusher January 30, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Muppets: Advancing the gay, Muslim, Socialist agenda to your children!

Loaded_Pants January 30, 2012 at 7:49 pm

Advancing the gay agenda began when a homosexual infiltrated Jim Henson's company: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Hunt_(puppet

YouBetcha January 30, 2012 at 2:17 pm

I'd rather sit my kid in front of a ten-hour loop of nothing but Beaker meeping than two fucking minutes of Fox News drivel.

Fare la Volpe January 30, 2012 at 2:40 pm

They'd at least get some culture out of it.

Baconzgood January 30, 2012 at 2:17 pm

DAMN. You know you're a shit "news" station when a plush toy just pwned you.

DerrickWildcat January 30, 2012 at 2:18 pm

To make Sesame Street more Fair and Balanced they should probably include a, "Go Fuck Yourself", "It's all Mine!" and, "It Sucks to be You" Muppets.

Baconzgood January 30, 2012 at 2:20 pm

They did. It's called Ron Paul.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 30, 2012 at 3:14 pm

"Mittens the Kitten" the 1% Muppet.

Generation[redacted] January 30, 2012 at 7:56 pm

Sharing is communism!

Wilcoxyz January 30, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Fox prefers The Electric Company.

Baconzgood January 30, 2012 at 2:25 pm

BANANA SPLITS LIBEL!

smokefilledroommate January 30, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Fox prefers no public television.

Generation[redacted] January 30, 2012 at 3:22 pm

Fox prefers the Mattel Toys Hersheys Chocobot Hour.

Loaded_Pants January 30, 2012 at 7:52 pm

Well, they were definitely never fans of Square One Television because, as we all know, they really hate math. It's sooo hard!

OkieDokieDog January 30, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Poor brainwashed children of America…. and I'm talking about the bible thumpers kids.

SorosBot January 30, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Since the Muppets got their big break educating children on Sesame Street, and as Rick Santorum has told us education is just liberal brainwashing, it's no wonder that they are a bunch of Fox-hating commies!

actor212 January 30, 2012 at 2:22 pm

I just got this tweet from the @SwedishChef:

Hurdaver, da hurdaver, da @FOXNews fullashit. BORK! BORK BORK!"

Beowoof January 30, 2012 at 2:23 pm

I can't get over how Fox feels threatened by a talking frog and talking pig. Well maybe I can, I feel threatened by Laura Ingrahm and she is a talking horse.

smokefilledroommate January 30, 2012 at 2:26 pm

And Megyn Kelly is a talking cunt.

Maman January 30, 2012 at 2:28 pm

It comes with the spelling of her name. gyn

bagofmice January 30, 2012 at 3:12 pm

That must be hysterical.

actor212 January 30, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Hey, Laura! Why the long face?

SorosBot January 30, 2012 at 2:37 pm

The talking pig Fox prefers is Rush Limbaugh.

actor212 January 30, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Oddly, they borrow each other's clothes…

Goonemeritus January 30, 2012 at 2:27 pm

With 120 million viewers world wide you don’t want to mess with Sesame Street. Fox News may be trying to punch up here but history shows Sesame Street will rip your lungs out.

ElPinche January 30, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Ms. Piggy is hot. I'd pork the bacon out of that swine. Is that sexist?

actor212 January 30, 2012 at 2:42 pm

PORCINE LIBEL!

AutomaticPilot January 30, 2012 at 3:04 pm

OT, but I love your avatar!

smokefilledroommate January 30, 2012 at 2:28 pm

I love that they get so damn upset over 'Tex Richman'.

Baconzgood January 30, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Today's show was brought to you by the letters F U and the # 50 Times over.

Loaded_Pants January 30, 2012 at 7:55 pm

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven! That's seven fucks not given that day! Ah! Ah! Ah!'

NewtsChicknNeck January 30, 2012 at 2:29 pm

seeing how the primaries have gone, Statler and/or Waldorf are the two best and most electable republicans this year.

Generation[redacted] January 30, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Don't underestimate Oscar the Grouch and his ability to appeal to the base.

Loaded_Pants January 30, 2012 at 8:04 pm

Lives in a trash can, hoards trash, has a pet worm & is a misanthrope. That sounds about right.

Extemporanus January 30, 2012 at 2:30 pm

McCarthyism once again rears its ugly head.

doloras January 30, 2012 at 2:31 pm

What's green and smells of bacon?

bagofmice January 30, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Kermit on a good night?

bagofmice January 30, 2012 at 3:31 pm

A Cobb salad?

bagofmice January 30, 2012 at 3:32 pm

240 dollars worth of pistachio ham pudding?

bagofmice January 30, 2012 at 3:36 pm

A lime based version of these events, as opposed to a series of more Lemony ones.

bagofmice January 30, 2012 at 3:38 pm

A punchline.

GOPCrusher January 30, 2012 at 4:27 pm

Rancid ham?

rocktonsam January 30, 2012 at 7:32 pm

Jan Brewer?

BaldarTFlagass January 30, 2012 at 2:32 pm

Hell, I bet even Beany and Cecil could fuck Fox's shit up.

ThundercatHo January 30, 2012 at 3:46 pm

What did Beany's girlfriend say?

Baconzgood January 30, 2012 at 2:35 pm

And Faux points out that Jon Stewart gave an interview to muppets in 5..4..3…

Biff January 30, 2012 at 6:58 pm

I never get tired of pointing out to them that Comedy Central is funny on purpose, unlike Fox "News".

Joshua Norton January 30, 2012 at 2:35 pm

Occupy Sesame Street!!!

James Michael Curley January 30, 2012 at 2:35 pm

Some day DVD's of "The Muppet Show" from the early 1980's will be made available and we can show our grandchildren why we're nuts.

SorosBot January 30, 2012 at 2:46 pm

The first three season are available, although sadly the first is missing some bits due to music rights issues; which I think is what's also holding up seasons four and five. I got two and three for Christmas and watched the shit out of them.

Chet Kincaid January 30, 2012 at 4:12 pm

Please tell me you got these for your kids.

GOPCrusher January 30, 2012 at 4:29 pm

Oh no. Who doesn't love Pigs In Space or Vetinarian Hospital?

SorosBot January 30, 2012 at 5:01 pm

Nope, I don't have kids, just for myself and the kid I was back when the show was on.

Slim_Pickins January 30, 2012 at 2:36 pm

Fox Business News bringing fresh meaning to the term Capitalist "Tool."

ifthethunderdontgetya January 30, 2012 at 2:36 pm

Miss Piggy versus Gretchen "Petunia" Carlson.

No contest!
~

lefty74 January 30, 2012 at 2:37 pm

I want to see the episode where Tex Richman gets caught after getting a "blowey" from that hooker Wendy Windmill and their tranny friend Sonny "A Cell D Cell" Solarcell .

BarryOPotter January 30, 2012 at 2:37 pm

I noticed the Faux shills provided a lot of baseless, vile accusations. Usually, the person making accusation without evidence is either already doing what they accuse the other of doing, or really wanting to do it…

Generation[redacted] January 30, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Waiting for a statement from the always controversial and militant Grover X.

HarryButtle January 30, 2012 at 4:12 pm

We didn't land on Fraggle Rock, Fraggle Rock landed on us!

WhatTheHolyHeck January 30, 2012 at 5:10 pm

Needs more love.

Joshua Norton January 30, 2012 at 2:40 pm

I was going to comment on how there's potentially a tremendous amount of amusement to be had in watching wingnuts mix it up with puppets. But that's pretty much what Fox does anyway.

However, it would be exceptionally hysterical to see Miss Piggy punch Bill O'Reilly in the face.

Loaded_Pants January 30, 2012 at 8:17 pm

But how do right wingers feel about the autocratic rule of King Friday the 13th & Corny S. Pecially's capitalist endeavors?

soeoho January 30, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Any Fox connection to News scares the H E duble toothpicks out of me and not just because of my racoon heritage!
Vun!….puppet head…Two!…puppet heads…Three!…puppet heads… Its an Occupy Sesame Street Movement!

Wilcoxyz January 30, 2012 at 2:51 pm

The Muppets could have named him N. Ron Richman.

Redhead January 30, 2012 at 2:52 pm

Wait, I thought "Muppets newt and piggy respond to charges by Fox News puppets" was about the latest Republican debates.

BigDumbRedDog January 30, 2012 at 2:55 pm

Fox news needs to report on those yo-gabba-gabba characters. They always be singing about sharing their toys and how it's okay to be different and stuff. Fuckin communists and their fucking agendas.

VinnyThePooh January 30, 2012 at 2:58 pm

I would tell the Tightie Righties to make Muppets in their own image but that would simply require turning the cameras onto themselves.

neo_conjob January 30, 2012 at 3:02 pm

Pig Limbaugh have ambiguous feelings for the scrumptious seductive liberal muppet.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 30, 2012 at 3:18 pm

If FOX News knew that they would be in a fight with puppets that say silly things, do you think they would have kept Glenn Beck around?

Generation[redacted] January 30, 2012 at 6:48 pm

Puppets that say silly things comprised the entirety of Glenn Beck's audience.

mavenmaven January 30, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Its sad that a felt puppet likely has a higher IQ than the entire Fox news network.

GortRay January 30, 2012 at 3:40 pm

Fox Noize Channel isn't funny, but it sure is a joke.

owhatever January 30, 2012 at 4:06 pm

Can I go live in Muppet world instead of this one?

GOPCrusher January 30, 2012 at 4:31 pm

Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street?

littlebigdaddy January 30, 2012 at 4:33 pm

Where do the Teletubbies stand on this?

Negropolis January 30, 2012 at 11:45 pm

Fully athwart.

sarah_connor January 30, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Kermit/Piggy 2016!!!

40 or 50 % McShineys January 30, 2012 at 4:51 pm

FOX Watcher Joe: "Man, that talkin pig puppet better not be brainwashin our childerns to hate capitalizm!!"

FOX Watcher Bob "Yeah, I agree! That Newt better cut out attacking Mitt about hizn imvestaments! THATAINT RAHT."

Biel_ze_Bubba January 30, 2012 at 5:03 pm

For the next GOPtard debate, can we have Waldorf and Statler as commenters?

Bill_Mars January 30, 2012 at 5:38 pm

The 2 old guys in the balcony remind me of Ailes and Murdoch…..

Thedongsofwar January 30, 2012 at 5:46 pm

"That wasn't half bad"

"It was ALL BAD!"

DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO

EloquentScience January 30, 2012 at 5:46 pm

Fox Business News was considering a new theme song, but after the Muppet press conference, "It's Easy Being Green" was just eliminated from consideration.

arihaya January 30, 2012 at 5:53 pm

FOX "News" is just upset because the Muppets used an evil oil baron , just like the Koch bros, as the villain in that movie,

they think that Hollywood should just stick to the usual stock villains: Arabs, Muslims, Messicans, Russians, Communists and any combination thereof

Loaded_Pants January 30, 2012 at 7:42 pm

If pancreatic cancer hadn't done Bill in, I think the two terms of Dubya would have.

Antispandex January 30, 2012 at 9:16 pm

"Are liberals trying to brainwash your kids against capitolism?"

I just love that! You know, because the obvious answer is, "Yes, and doing a really shitty job of it, from the looks of congress"!

ttommyunger January 30, 2012 at 10:29 pm

So Faux couldn't find a guest hack without a flaming lisp for Chrisakes? Too funny!

a_pink_poodle January 30, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Ugh there goes Ms Piggy opening her big mouth again! She's always had this problem since the Muppet Movie

Negropolis January 30, 2012 at 11:36 pm

Shit just got real, Muppet style.

But, but, isn't pork supposed to be a white meat?

Swedish Chef makes more sense than Fox News.

Negropolis January 30, 2012 at 11:46 pm

I much prefer this talking pig to Rush Limbaugh.

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