Mitt Romney, who was slightly more humanoid in 1994 than he is today, also thought blind trusts, of which he has one, and which he passionately defended during Thursday night’s Jacksonville debate, were terrible, devious things. How exactly did he put it? Oh yes, a blind trust is an “age-old ruse.”

During a debate with Massachusetts Senate incumbent Ted Kennedy during the 1994 campaign, a partially vibrant Romney attacked Kennedy’s blind trusts, saying:

The blind trust is an age-old ruse. You give a blind trust rules. You can say to a blind trust, don’t invest in properties which would be in conflict of interest or where the seller might think they’re going to get an advantage from me.

Kennedy then proceeded to whoop Romney’s ass, saying, “Mr. Romney, the Kennedys are not in public service to make money. We have paid too high a price.” And that was that, pretty much.

Romney’s response on his own blind trusts last night was not nearly as convincing. Following criticism from Gingrich that some of Romney’s investments included Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, Romney said:

First of all, my investments are not made by me. My investments, for the last 10 years, have been in a blind trust, managed by a trustee.

The Bot strikes again. Interestingly, Romney must have thought Kennedy’d had kind of a great idea, because he opened his troubling blind trust in 1996, two years after his failed Senate bid. [BuzzFeed/CBS News]

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  • Obvs, the gander gets all the sauce, the goose just gets pâtéd.

  • memzilla

    Dear Rethuglican Lurkers On Wonkette:

    Feel free to share and quote the above.

    Sincerely, Teh Wonketteers


    • Wonk, wonk, wonk

      / making the wonk noise by putting right hand into left arm pit and pumping left arm.

  • SorosBot

    "Mr. Romney, the Kennedys are not in public service to make money. "

    Romney, however, is in public service to make money, by lowering his own taxes.

    • Ruhe

      "Mr. Gingrich, the Romneys are not in public service to make money. We've made quite enough already."

      • memzilla

        "Mr. Gingrich, the Romneys are not in public service to make money. We're in public service to make more money."

        • Negropolis

          Honestly, you two are good.

      • SorosBot

        Among these people there's no such thing as enough money.

        • SpiderCrab

          Among these people there is no dignity, no embarrassment, and no scruples.

  • I fell for Willard like a blind roofer.

  • chascates

    But Romney thought the POPE was controlling that trust!

  • Beowoof

    You see these days I just sit around running for office making 20 million a year and being taxed at ridiculously low rate for doing absolutely nothing. Ain't it grand to be part of the 1%.

  • freakishlywrong

    Anyone who votes for this lying charlatan is blind and cannot be trusted.

    • Puffperney

      That would be about 25% of the republican base… …consistently.

  • orygoon

    Willard: there is nothing defensible about having that much money. Less than none if you don't pay reasonable taxes on it. Just stop trying. Give a bunch away to some real charity. Hint: a secretive, corporate cult that amasses lots of glittery wealth doesn't count.

  • miss_grundy

    I would love to see these jerks beaten up by some lowly blue-collar type, both verbally and physically. And for it to happen at one of these debates. Like a cream pie in the face live on tv. Wouldn't that be a crack-up???? I am just so tired of these rich jerks and their stupidity…..

  • Hey, you got your blind ambition in my blind trust! And you got your blind trust in my blind ambition!

    Two tastes that taste great together!

  • No one messes with Diamond Joe Quimby. No one.

    Good thing the Mitt-ata didn't attack Quimby about his pronunciation of the word "Chowder."

    • "Hey! I'm not-ah paying you to talk!"

    • prommie

      Say it, Frenchie.

    • Negropolis

      Chowdah! Chowdair. Chowdah!

  • mavenmaven

    Interesting that Kennedy accuses Romney of being a flip flopper on the issues already back in 1994!

    • Romney invented Flip Flop! He used to DJ at house parties while growing up in Detroit.

  • Conservatives are JUST TOO STUPID to run a political campaign!

  • Mittens' also has bland trust in T-Paw, his campaign's national co-chair….

  • In 2016 Romney's putting his assets in a Deaf, Dumb and Blind Trust, just to be sure.

    • ShaveTheWhales


  • Callyson

    "The blind trust is an age-old ruse."
    Funny, I was just thinking the same thing about those leveraged buyouts that Bain Capital conducted when you were there…

  • SayItWithWookies

    Mitt believes in blind trusts — he especially believes the American people should blindly trust him when he says he pays 15% in taxes when it's actually even lower than that. Just like the FEC should blindly trust him when he forgets 23 different investment accounts in his financial disclosures. Seriously, nothing to see here — stop your prying.

  • Barrelhse

    I never trust the blind. Fuckin' thieves.

    • Biff

      I know, right? Worst pencils evar!

    • emmelemm

      True story: there's a guy who sits at an intersection near where I live with dark sunglasses on, begging for change, intimating that he is blind.

      A while back, I was talking to someone who lives in my building, and she said she had seen the guy in a different neighborhood, walking down the street, no sunglasses, clear as day.

  • sarah_connor

    yea, and he never fires people who provide him services! cos he's a job creator!!! wait, nevermind…

  • Limeylizzie

    Kennedy is hitting him, from the grave ,for every shitty thing Mittens has said about him in these debates.

    • chascates

      How'd the audition go?

      • prommie

        4:40 EST. But her hoo-ha is all fresh and minty in preparation.

      • Limeylizzie

        It's in a couple of hours, I am painting my face!

        • Millennial Malaise

          Meant to wish you luck yesterday! Hope you get it, that show is great.

          • Limeylizzie

            Thanks it's a really teeny role but it's a scene with Steve Buscemi, so that would be cool.

        • ShaveTheWhales

          Break a limb.

    • Kennedy had more genuine intellect in his little finger than Mittens does in his entire, magic underwear encased body.

      • Limeylizzie

        Plus a whole lot more fun, I'll warrant.

  • arihaya

    So Romney was against it before he was for it before he was against it ?

    • The "against it before he was for it before he was against it.." plays in an infinite loop.

  • Barrelhse

    Speaking of Newt Gingrich, this treaty (signed by the US in 1967) would prohibit any country from claiming the moon. Yes, Newt, even if it's a state.
    Presidential material? You decide!

  • PuckStopsHere

    You'd have to be blind to trust Mitt Romney.

  • Extemporanus

    As I noted during the last live-blog, Mitt Romney is just cold lyin' his magic underpants off about the whole blind trust bullshit, especially in relation to Fannie & Freddie.

    Top Republican primary-related stories on CNN right now? Romney right about the moon; Ron Paul is a quipster; Gingrich ate chicken wings.

    I want to hate fuck our worthless media up the ass with Santorum, literally, so fucking bad right now, but their big derping heads are in the goddamn way.

    • WunkRocker

      Quipster Ron Paul signed off on racist 1990s newsletters
      What's worse than being a racist? Pretending to be a racist to profit from the hate mongering.

  • meatlofer

    So Stevie Wonder invests Mittens moolah?

  • Tundra Grifter

    So Mittens was against blind trusts before he was for them? But he'll be against them again if that gets him some votes?

    I might be alone on this one, but I can not claim the slightest bit of surprise to learn his views.

    I think we could all save some time here if we could just make a list of the positions Mittens has always had. Here's a postage stamp – you can fill out the roster on the back.

  • Dashboard Buddha

    Duplicitous fuckwad is duplicitous.

  • BarackMyWorld

    If I had a dollar every time Romney contradicted himself, I'd invest it in the Cayman Islands.

    • Serolf_Divad

      That a winning bumper sticker, my man! Start printing those!

  • Serolf_Divad

    What the Hell has happened to Democrats that they can't show that passion any more? Teddy is sorely missed.

    • prommie

      If a democrat shows passion, hell, if a democrat actually IS a democrat, he or she is systematically marginalized by the media, which will portray them as a Kook and a Loon and at best, a Semi-Lovable Eccentric, like Dennis Kucinich. Chemtrails, for the win!

  • Slim_Pickins

    Converting to Roman Catholicism may be the only flip-flop remaining for Mitt.

    • emmelemm

      Wouldn't that be something?

  • Ruhe

    Referring to a blind trust or any other investment arrangement or instrument as a "ruse" is so heterodox that Mitt should have been excommunicated. His underwear must have protected him.

  • Allmighty_Manos

    I pretty much assume anything Romney says could be contradicted by earlier public Romney statement.

  • owhatever

    My blind trust is blinder than yours, but it made me a fuckin' ton of money last year. Eat cake, America.

  • Redrighthand

    Pak chooie unf – mitt romney.

  • coolhandnuke

    Blind faith and blind trust are the charities the GOP pin 51% of their hope on.

  • I'll bet Newt wishes he had a blind trust managed by a trustee. Of course he'd have to find someone he trusts. Not Callista — that homewrecking hussy. Not his sister — that non-heterosexual. Not himself — he's made of 51% scam (plus 49% fat).

  • Guppy

    Romney hits back at Gingrich by demonstrating he can be just as big a hypocrite.

  • Oh wow, Teddy actually played the "they killed my fucking brothers!" card!

  • Yeah Mitt, you really made Ted sweat there, not knowing if he'd have a foreclosed, second-mortgaged house to come home to.

  • DemonicRage

    America should just shut up and start to love the fact that Daddy Warbacks is coming to take us back to some dream version of the 1950's. It will be so wonderful when Erik Cantor and the magic Mitt are in agreement about everything, and we can go back to the poors stuffing emergency rooms of hospitals for medical attention, and maybe even coathanger abortions in back alleys.

  • Antispandex

    You guys just don't get it! It's wrong when a Democrat does it, because they are all crooks. If a Teapublican does it, it is all right because they are doing it for Jesus. Geeze! Grow up!

  • CapnFatback

    Blind trust? Hell, Romney would attack a blind dog if he thought it would make him look butch enough to corner the date-rape vote.

  • Troglodeity

    And the campaign ads just keep on writing themselves.

  • BZ1

    Mitt, of course, doesn't even know how much he is worth, what his money is invested in or what percentage he pays … sorry, flight of pigs just coming in

  • teebob2000

    Don't these stupid fuckers yet realize that EVERYTHING THEY'VE EVER SAID IS ON FUCKING VIDEO???????

  • DahBoner

    I think what Romney is trying to say is "Insider Trading is Perfectly Legal, my friends", if you are a politician with your money in a blind trust.

    //wink, wink

  • Negropolis

    Man, Romney actually looks animated by something other than a computer chip, there. Must have been a treat to be human with emotions and shit, at one time, the poor fool.

    I miss Teddy. He didn't have a problem being human, and too often in his life the problem was that he was too human, but I miss that old Boston bean. Honestly, the guy was able to get what little reform on healthcare we ended up getting through the legislature. Can you imagine how much he would have had the president's back during the debt ceiling debacle and such? There is no one that commands the kind of respect in that body that he had on our side. Now, all we have left is old Scary Reid, who inspires about as much confidence and fear, as well, I really don't know.

  • Negropolis

    New Romney is going to be so pissed at Old Romney when he sees this.

  • ttommyunger

    Mittens talking about "Blind" and "Trust" in the same sentence only proves Republicans have no sense of irony, or humor, for that matter.

  • mormos

    if Romney had that kind of vitriol today he could actually win the presidency.

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