NOT WHAT THE NEA HAD IN MIND  5:10 pm January 23, 2012

Man Writes Spectacularly Bad Song, ‘Stand With Governor Walker’

by Liz Colville

Glen Shulfer is an authentic, honest-to-god supporter of Wisconsin Governorish Scott Walker, but he is a musician first, and by first we mean, Oh my word, this guy has written songs: “Dog Bone Blues,” “You Never Do What I Say” and “Hidden Princess” are the titles of just three of Shulfer’s too, too many compositions, many of which sadly are not available on his website except in title form. What better way to honor victim of justice Walker than to write the man a song? Shulfer, in a local Wisconsin radio interview, says he’s been a fan of politics since he was “a young little boy,” and considers himself like, a hipster Scott Walker supporter: he was a fan of the guy before anyone else seemed to be, and endured a lot of adversity in showing his support. He was heckled and bullied by Walker haters “almost to the point of touching,” he says. The horror. This song, “Stand With Scott Walker,” should teach ‘em.

Shulfer’s Muppets/Journey/Manilowe-eque ballad of course has a video of boring pictures of Scott Walker existing and sporting dyed hair the color of eggplant. It also features some serious vocal runs, a reference to Sisyphus, elementary rhyming (“Scott Walker”/”not a big fancy talker”) and pushy declarations like:

We got to keep moving ahead
All the way
With Governor Walker

By the second verse, he’s already lowering expectations:

He took on the deficit
And asked the union folks to pay
Just a teeny tiny bit
To make it fair in every way

Just a teeny tiny bit. If this isn’t enough to get you in the spirit, there is another, better/worst of all and thematically similar number called “Union Man.” [AV Club]

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 191 comments }

Mkloz January 23, 2012 at 5:14 pm

And by "status quo" he means lions. Deadly, sexy lions. Rawrrr!

nounverb911 January 23, 2012 at 5:14 pm

Needs more Woody Guthrie.

HistoriCat January 23, 2012 at 5:25 pm

Needs more Chuck Barris

OneDollarJuana January 23, 2012 at 6:51 pm

Needs more Gong Show.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:01 pm

Needs MOAR banging about the head and shoulders with a Very Large Array of gongs.

Lascauxcaveman January 23, 2012 at 7:11 pm

And cowbells. More cowbell.

Geminisunmars January 23, 2012 at 5:41 pm

Needs more woodies.

Monsieur_Grumpe January 23, 2012 at 7:07 pm

and Pete Seeger

Biel_ze_Bubba January 23, 2012 at 7:50 pm

Argh … needs more internet blackout.

DrunkIrishman January 23, 2012 at 5:14 pm

Hillary4U&Me thinks this song is shit.

jus_wonderin January 23, 2012 at 5:25 pm

I love Hilz, but that song is one full on overdose of sugary sweet. Argh.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:07 pm

I don't like that song either, but it doesn't come close to this paean to awfulness.

nounverb911 January 23, 2012 at 5:15 pm

Vote for Governor Sisyphus. Always fighting those uphill battles against rights.

SorosBot January 23, 2012 at 5:16 pm

He's standing 10 feet to from Ashland to Monroe? God those lyrics are awful. Agh Liz you are hurting us.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:08 pm

Srsly. I'm thinking of putting out a contract on her, after this. Although we'll miss her writing.

EatsBabyDingos January 23, 2012 at 5:16 pm

Gaaah, any cheesier and it would need an FDA label.

nounverb911 January 23, 2012 at 5:17 pm

"Sing cheese or die?"

Lascauxcaveman January 23, 2012 at 7:14 pm

Hey, cmon, it's Wisconsin. What'd you expect?

GorzoTheMighty January 23, 2012 at 5:17 pm

Stand up against the wall with the Governor (m-F**ker).

Mumbletypeg January 23, 2012 at 5:18 pm

Sorry Scott.. but you haven't had gen-u-ine fandom inflicted upon you by amaturd songwriters until you've had Battle Hymn of the Republic mashed up into tin-ear dregs of fawning word-salad reflux, i.e. worthy only of Her Highness Lou Sarah.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:09 pm

You know I love you. You absolutely know that. But after that HORRENDOUS video, I am so not fucking clicking on that link, Mumbletypeg. SO NOT!!!

(runs screaming out of the room)

Golfing_OJ January 23, 2012 at 5:19 pm

Fine then, recruit this fucking twerp to sing "Nearer My God to Thee" when the neo-Jacobins frog-march Walker to the front of the firing squad.

Chichikovovich January 23, 2012 at 5:43 pm

One song that invariably lifts my spirits whenever I'm troubled or despairing is the live version of "Nearer to Thee" sung by Sam Cooke and the Soul Stirrers at the 1955 Shrine concert. I'm listening to it right now, to wash the strains of Mr. Shulfer's creation from my consciousness. And I assure you, if that no-talent weed-voiced wingnut should ever soil that song by singing it in my presence he'll be dead before he completes two bars.

deelzebub January 23, 2012 at 6:59 pm

That is a beautiful performance, but did Sam Cooke ever do anything in front of a microphone that wasn't at least 500% better than anyone else could do?

Chichikovovich January 23, 2012 at 7:25 pm

Sam Cooke was a once-in-a-lifetime voice and musical talent, that's true. But even by his high standards those three songs in the Shrine concert are transcendent. The performance of "I Have a Friend Above all Others" is, to my taste, even better. The call and response with Paul Foster on "Be With me Jesus" is a revelation too – I love the way their voices contrast on the Soul Stirrers studio recordings, but this live performance they're pushing each other to a burning intensity that goes beyond anything in the studio.

littlebigdaddy January 23, 2012 at 5:20 pm

I don't think he's gonna get the chicks with this songwriting thing.

ElPinche January 23, 2012 at 5:21 pm

He doesn't need chicks when he has Jesus.

smokefilledroommate January 23, 2012 at 5:38 pm

and Governor Walker

SayItWithWookies January 23, 2012 at 5:40 pm

Is that Consuela's little boy?

smokefilledroommate January 23, 2012 at 5:50 pm

I thought that was Diabeeto.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:10 pm

He'd fuckin' better have Jesus, cos he sure as hell ain't gettin' nothing else, not with that shit.

littlebigdaddy January 23, 2012 at 7:52 pm

Cuz I went through a singer-songwriter phase in the 70s-80s and that was the only reason for doing it.

Antispandex January 23, 2012 at 5:20 pm

To make it fair in every way? So he asked the bazillionaire's to pay too? Oh, that's taxin' folks out of their hard earned money? I never get this crap right. I'm still trying to figure out how Paris, Nikki, and folks like that, can make it by on what the gomment has left them with…you know, of the money they worked so hard for. I need more schoolin' I reckon.

Lascauxcaveman January 23, 2012 at 7:20 pm

Considering the union employees came right out and volunteered to take a pay cut, I'm guessing our future Grammy-Winner has forgotten the part where his hero said, "Naw, fuck you guys, this is about taking away your bargaining rights; not a few bucks."

ElPinche January 23, 2012 at 5:20 pm

NEEDS MOAR GWAR.

coolhandnuke January 23, 2012 at 5:20 pm

Destined to be a Flaccid Rock classic.

jus_wonderin January 23, 2012 at 5:21 pm

There is NO way I am listening to this song. Don't try to trick me.

orygoon January 23, 2012 at 6:19 pm

I am totally assuming it is NSFW.

memzilla January 23, 2012 at 6:45 pm

Not Safe For Workers.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:12 pm

Also Women, Wonketeerz, Wonks … basically any variation on the human species that cares for its sanity and health.

Monsieur_Grumpe January 23, 2012 at 6:31 pm

Coward!
I listened and I only shoved a pencil in one ear.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:11 pm

Do NOT listen to that song unless you're yearning for the feel of a sharpened chopstick crosswise through the eardrums. DO NOT.

Schmannnity January 23, 2012 at 5:21 pm

I guess he broke the songwriters' union also.

UnionAgitator January 23, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Show us on the doll where they almost touched your teeny tiny bit, Glen.

orygoon January 23, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Stand AGAINST 1.9 million cheeseheads?

Good luck with that! (not really)

Chet Kincaid January 23, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Fucking Glenn Frey!!!

Chet Kincaid January 23, 2012 at 5:22 pm

Scott Walker, Real Man Of Genius.

Tundra Grifter January 23, 2012 at 5:27 pm

CK:

FTW !!!

MosesInvests January 23, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Mr. Union-buster Koch-gobbler Guy.

Chet Kincaid January 23, 2012 at 5:41 pm

Here's to you, spending minute after painful minute taking orders from the "Koch Brothers" on a prank phone call…

Indiepalin January 23, 2012 at 5:23 pm

If you like this record, you'll be sure to enjoy Bruce Springteen's latest, "Red Dust"

Chet Kincaid January 23, 2012 at 5:23 pm

Mass executions would be a great deterrent against this kind of bullshit.

elviouslyqueer January 23, 2012 at 5:37 pm

You are on FIRE today, good sir!

Chet Kincaid January 23, 2012 at 5:40 pm

Why thank you! Your wit is mutually admired.

Steverino247 January 23, 2012 at 7:12 pm

Very hot. Are you on the liveblog detail this evening?

Chichikovovich January 23, 2012 at 6:06 pm

Mr Shulfer, there is only one reason someone would write and sing a song this execrable: it is because you have made the personal decision that you are prepared to get rich by destroying our children. I have made the decision that I love our children enough that we will kill you if you do this.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:14 pm

I'm in. I have sharpened hiking sticks, crutches, a fine collection of cooking knives, many heavy implements …

JackDempsey1 January 23, 2012 at 5:24 pm

I congratulate the songwriter for NOT using the obvious and overused "cheese/please/knees/bees" rhyming scheme.

Geminisunmars January 23, 2012 at 5:51 pm

I like to go with the flees/fleas/breeze/geez scheme.

Jukesgrrl January 23, 2012 at 5:54 pm

I was hoping for Packers, sackers, jackers, and whackers.

Chet Kincaid January 23, 2012 at 6:23 pm

Bucks, fucks, luck, ducks, shucks?
Brewers, doers, cures, endures?

SayItWithWookies January 23, 2012 at 5:24 pm

He cut our teachers' salaries
And fired all the rest
'Cause we need ignorant widget turners
Not citizens who protest.

And he ended collective bargaining
To cut taxes for the wealthy
'Cause Dickenisan economics
Are what makes America healthy

And we will peeeeeeee
On Governor Walker
We will peeeeeee
On Governor Walker

Jukesgrrl January 23, 2012 at 6:02 pm

Don't forget Tonette
and her handbags for charity.
How she gets all wet
Grabbing money, "More for me!"

Beowoof January 23, 2012 at 5:24 pm

i have a dream of watching someone beat this guy senseless El Kabong's Kabonger. Oh he already is senseless, okay well just a good beating then.

Biff January 23, 2012 at 5:38 pm

That's no way to treat a Perfectly Good Guitar!

Lit Happens January 23, 2012 at 5:26 pm

See where Walker is superimposed over the map of Wisconsin? His balls are right over Prairie Du Sac. Just sayin'.

ElPinche January 23, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Glen Shulfer, the Jon McNaughton of Kermit renditions.

coolhandnuke January 23, 2012 at 5:27 pm

Needz moar Ashcroft.

weej_bain January 23, 2012 at 5:32 pm

With or without the Pancreatitis Trio?

coolhandnuke January 23, 2012 at 6:32 pm

With the accompaniment of the inflamed Malignant Merry Makers.

flamingpdog January 23, 2012 at 5:49 pm

Let the Eagle Snore.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:17 pm

Srsly. While covering up all available boobs.

Callyson January 23, 2012 at 8:36 pm

But how will they find their way to the voting booths if they are covered up?

YouBetcha January 23, 2012 at 5:28 pm

I'd hit that.

new_pic_for_NEWTer January 23, 2012 at 6:06 pm

…with a shovel. You left that out. You're welcome.

Steverino247 January 23, 2012 at 7:13 pm

I was thinking ball peen hammer…

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:18 pm

Anything capable of delivering a short, sharp shock …

SorosBot January 23, 2012 at 6:29 pm

You see the pictures of him throughout the video? Ew.

edgydrifter January 23, 2012 at 5:28 pm

I hope Glen Shulfer will remember
Union Man don't need him around anyhow

doloras January 23, 2012 at 8:02 pm

SWEEEEET HOME AFL-CIO

ALIVE! January 24, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Where the collars are BLUUUUUEEEE…

Tundra Grifter January 23, 2012 at 5:29 pm

I honestly think the crappy Christian rock has polluted many other forms of music. Not that this song is really music, but you get the idea.

A couple of those young ladies holding protest signs have astonishingly chubby pins.

I did not the screen shot of the Dykes on Bykes.

Terrible lyrics, lousy beat, couldn't really dance to it – I'll give it a 1, Dave.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:19 pm

I'll give it a punch in the snoot if it comes around asking how it did, is what I'll give it, TG.

Tundra Grifter January 23, 2012 at 7:27 pm

MB: Was it in "Airplane" where the ticket agent said "I'll just punch it up on the computer" and then hit the screen with a boxing glove?

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:32 pm

I think so, TG. Now I have an excuse to watch it again. That one and Blazing Saddles are my two favourite movies. Pretty highbrow, eh?

Tundra Grifter January 23, 2012 at 8:36 pm

MB:

No need to apologize for a classic. And there is on doubt "Airplane" is a classic. "Up a Creek," "Tin Men," "Used Cars," "Animal House" – good times!

Mojopo January 23, 2012 at 5:29 pm

Needs more explosives.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:19 pm

Preferably stuffed up Glen Fluffer's ass and lit to go off coinciding with one of those dreadful clash-bangs.

SorosBot January 23, 2012 at 5:29 pm

His next hit will be on the joys of Koch sucking.

Beowoof January 23, 2012 at 5:29 pm

He sings as well as Joe plumbs.

elviouslyqueer January 23, 2012 at 5:33 pm

He’s been a fan of politics since he was “a young little boy"… He was heckled and bullied by Walker haters “almost to the point of touching,” he says.

Okay, so what I'm getting from Glen Shulfer is that Scott Walker touched him when he was a young little boy, and he's been a Walker supporter ever since. Gotcha.

ManchuCandidate January 23, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Sounds vaguely like the Enterprise (Star Trek) "Theme" Song…

It´s been a long road, beating up teachers here.
It´s been a long time, but my time is finally near.
And I can feel the change in the wind right now. Everyone's in my way.
And they´re just gonna beat me down some more, yes they´re just gonna beat me down.

Cause I´ve got Koch in my heart.
I´m going where the Koch will send me.
I´ve got delusion to believe that I can do anything.
I´ve got strength of the dumb. And they are gonna bend or break me.
I can ruin any state. I´ve got Koch, I´ve got Koch, Koch in my heart.

jus_wonderin January 23, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Diane Warren Libel!!!!!!!!

YasserArraFeck January 23, 2012 at 6:15 pm

that's one big koch if it reached all the way up to your heart – the brothers have a future in the adult entertainment industry if this whole Bloated Plutocrat gig doesn't pan out

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:20 pm

I think you meant "mouth, dear.

Schmannnity January 23, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Someone bite the head off a bat.

DerrickWildcat January 23, 2012 at 5:34 pm

I will walk with Governor Stander.

Generation[redacted] January 23, 2012 at 5:42 pm

No one can be blander.
To unions he won't pander,
He's gonna fight… and, er…

Chichikovovich January 23, 2012 at 5:46 pm

gerrymander.

SorosBot January 23, 2012 at 5:56 pm

His opponent he'll slander,
his speech will meander,
He walks with a canter,
He's a known insane ranter.

(OK those last two are near rhymes).

Chillwillard January 23, 2012 at 5:35 pm

Your move, Nickelback.

smokefilledroommate January 23, 2012 at 5:37 pm

I can't get my face out of contorted cringe-mode.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:21 pm

Fright'ning, innit, what bad music can do to a person?

NorthStarSpanx January 23, 2012 at 5:37 pm

Conservatives aren't artistic, and if they think they are, they are just bad. They look at artists and say, "Get a job."

chascates January 23, 2012 at 5:40 pm

It sounds a lot better when Sly and the Family Stone do it.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:23 pm

Hon, it would sound better if the local fucking town drunk did it. This guy can't sing. I mean, he can, obviously, but his voice is irritating, and the music is terrible and it's just so incredibly *bad* and puerile and meaningless and pathetic — it's like a bunch of pre-teens with overindulgent parents squawking away on a school stage. No one can tell them they're bad, but everyone would really like to.

Thurman Munster IV January 23, 2012 at 5:40 pm

R governor, he ain't no orange
R governor, he stoopid as a door hinge

Rotundo_ January 23, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Oranges, Poranges, who said there ain't no rhyme for oranges?

Chichikovovich January 23, 2012 at 5:59 pm

Ah, memories – I haven't heard that line since Witchiepoo's uplifting rendition on H. R. Pufenstuf.

MissTaken January 23, 2012 at 5:40 pm

Needz Moar Freebird

SorosBot January 23, 2012 at 6:00 pm

If I'd leave here tomorrow,
I'd hide away on Wall Street.

MissTaken January 23, 2012 at 6:16 pm

For I must be foreclosing on, now
Cause there's too many people in homes
I don't wanna see

AlterNewt January 23, 2012 at 6:58 pm

Waving lighter, etc.

notreelyhelping January 23, 2012 at 5:41 pm

Eh. I'm holding out for the Jandek cover version.

weej_bain January 23, 2012 at 5:41 pm

That rooster can sure Koch a doodle do. Yee haw!

But that spectacularly bad song needz a refreshing pallet cleanser from the HoverRound queens Margaret and Helen.

Biff January 23, 2012 at 5:43 pm

I find this song extremely difficult to masturbate to.

ononehand January 23, 2012 at 5:43 pm

Here are some different lyrics you can sing to that tune, probably by the same writer:

It's Friday, Friday
Gotta get down on Friday
Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend, weekend
Friday, Friday
Gettin' down on Friday
Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend

DerrickWildcat January 23, 2012 at 5:43 pm

I think the best part of this movie is when that guy is pinching that big yellow cat's nose.

Generation[redacted] January 23, 2012 at 5:43 pm

Jesus, man, can you change the youtube? I had a rough night and I hate the fucking Eagles, man.

elviouslyqueer January 23, 2012 at 5:44 pm

I would also like to unsee forever that still of Scott Walker, astride a motorcycle, and wearing quite possibly the gayest looking leather vest in the history of gay.

ThundercatHo January 23, 2012 at 6:15 pm
WhatTheHeck January 23, 2012 at 5:45 pm

“I’d like to teach
the world to sing
in perfect harmony.”

Unfortunately, the world’s gone to shit.

jus_wonderin January 23, 2012 at 5:47 pm

"Ebony and Ivory, live together in perfect harmony…….."

This one too!

BarackMyWorld January 23, 2012 at 5:46 pm

Weird Al might call this a "target rich environment."

mavenmaven January 23, 2012 at 5:46 pm

The fascists didn't write many good songs back then, either, and it doesn't sound like they've improved any.

Mahousu January 23, 2012 at 5:47 pm

When we faced an uphill climb, with a future not too bright,

Yeah, there's something not too bright here.

smokefilledroommate January 23, 2012 at 5:48 pm

Dear Mr. Sulfur,
Can I get this as a midi ringtone? That would be rad.

smokefilledroommate January 23, 2012 at 5:48 pm

My favorite part is at 2:28. God, what a horrible voice. Thank god I'll nevah, evah have to hear that garbage again.

DerrickWildcat January 23, 2012 at 5:49 pm

This song will not be a very big hit in Milwaukee because they only listen to bands like Cradle of Filth and We are Legion.

ShaveTheWhales January 23, 2012 at 8:05 pm

I'd like to hear the Violent Femmes cover this.

SaintRond January 23, 2012 at 5:50 pm

There was a Koch-Sucker from Heath
Who'd push back the foreskins with his teeth
It wasn't for fame or for love of the game
But to get at the cheese underneath…

Whoa whoa whoa whoa! Yeah yeah yeah yeah!

ThundercatHo January 23, 2012 at 6:16 pm

smegma libel!

Biff January 23, 2012 at 6:17 pm

Fromunda!

arihaya January 23, 2012 at 5:51 pm

why yes,,, the Tea Party demographic cannot walk without a Walker,, or a Rascal for that matter

Rotundo_ January 23, 2012 at 5:52 pm

Just a note from the Badger State: There are some talented individuals in the arts, music, dance and drama here. We don't consider Glen to be among them, but there are some talented individuals. This song is almost as good a song as Scooter is a governor. We're almost all looking forward to Scooter going back to whatever he might be capable of in private enterprise (parking lot attendant? french fry technician? mop boy at adult arcade?).

WordSaladNation January 23, 2012 at 5:53 pm

I actually just paused Spookey Ruben to listen to this shit. Back to iTunes!

flamingpdog January 23, 2012 at 5:53 pm

The guy who wrote "Nixon Now More Than Ever" is turning over in his grave. And if he isn't dead yet, he should be.

Juicy_Stalin January 23, 2012 at 5:57 pm

What a hack! "Stand with Governor Walker" is just his earlier hit "America" with different lyrics.

Nostrildamus January 23, 2012 at 5:58 pm

This is what happens when you cut arts funding.

smokefilledroommate January 23, 2012 at 6:00 pm

This is also what happens when you cut farts.

HarryButtle January 23, 2012 at 5:59 pm

Made it to the bridge at 2:20, what's that win me?

Seriously, Sgt Barry Sadler's laughing at this ridiculous shit.

new_pic_for_NEWTer January 23, 2012 at 6:12 pm

I watched the whole thing, but with the sound off. Who wins, your scarred eardrums, or my bleeding eyeholes?

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 23, 2012 at 5:59 pm

With all the money the Koch's have, you think they could have at least gotten Woody Guthrie's non-union Mexican equivalent to write their songs.

Wadisay January 23, 2012 at 8:10 pm

If the Kochs have an iPod, this is on it (right after "Let the Eagle Soar").

KeepFnThatChicken January 23, 2012 at 6:02 pm

That song is merely one synclavier-type synth sound from being a new Christian hymn.

Rotundo_ January 23, 2012 at 6:33 pm

Swap out Jesus for Walker, throw in a few Holly Lew YAHH's in and you're there. I suspect this guy will go xtian shortly if he hasn't already.

Blueb4sunrise January 23, 2012 at 6:02 pm

For relief……….

Take one of these and call me in the morning

[my favorite part is at 3:00 when the MC tries to end it]

Jukesgrrl January 23, 2012 at 6:05 pm

Just imagine Steven Tyler complaining about groupies bothering him "almost to the point of touching."

Radiotherapy January 23, 2012 at 6:05 pm

He got the cross-eyed, college dropout, union killin', Koch sucking blues.

YasserArraFeck January 23, 2012 at 6:10 pm

The iTunes Store will pay you 99 cents if you download it

YasserArraFeck January 23, 2012 at 6:12 pm

possibly the longest 3 minutes, 21 seconds I have ever endured

Steverino247 January 23, 2012 at 7:18 pm

No, that would be listening to Whitney Houston yodeling the National Anthem.

PuckStopsHere January 23, 2012 at 6:13 pm

Jan. 5, 2012: The day the music died.

smokefilledroommate January 23, 2012 at 6:17 pm

Hidden Princess? Is that for a porn soundtrack?

ttommyunger January 23, 2012 at 6:19 pm

‘Stand With Governor Walker’ Amazing! How DOES he stand with a Koch up his ass?

YasserArraFeck January 23, 2012 at 6:20 pm

"Stand on Governor Walker" – but don't forget to wipe your feet before you come indoors

MissTaken January 23, 2012 at 6:20 pm

Gawd Liz, would it hurt you to play some Foghat every once in a while?

Steverino247 January 23, 2012 at 7:20 pm

How about some Nazareth…

There's no votin' for
That son of a bitch!
There's no votin' for that sonofabitch.

Mojopo January 23, 2012 at 6:21 pm

This is the kind of song that makes me miss cassette tapes, because when something sucked you could rip the tape out of the case and throw it out the window. That always made me feel better. That and backing my car over the cassette. I wish I could do both to this song.

BaldarTFlagass January 23, 2012 at 6:23 pm

I'm put in mind of Dylan's "Hurricane" or Joanie Baez singing about "Joe Hill".

Monsieur_Grumpe January 23, 2012 at 6:29 pm

Not too many things rhyme with Walker. I would have used fucker but that's just me.

Mojopo January 23, 2012 at 6:33 pm

Foot Locker, fart knocker, loud talker…

ShaveTheWhales January 23, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Koch salker

real_dc_native January 23, 2012 at 6:56 pm

It's really amazing, from Newt Gingrich to Scott Walker, the GOP has manage to produce such a crop of human turds ate every level of government. I wonder if this is how it felt in the Roman Empire.

AlterNewt January 23, 2012 at 6:57 pm

Yup. The piano intro was all I needed.

Soylent Green January 23, 2012 at 6:58 pm

Marker 0.17: that liontamer in the handlebar moustache, white leotards and tu-tu. Wow. WTF.

MittBorg January 23, 2012 at 7:00 pm

Dear god that was truly awful. WHEN am I gonna fucking learn NOT to watch/listen/ask about ANYthing here?

Liz Colville, you better not wear a huge sign saying "I am responsible for unleashing Glen Shofar upon the world." Not if you want to celebrate many more birfdays. Jes' sayin'.

Radiotherapy January 23, 2012 at 7:18 pm

So I guess it's a good evening to be at work. And even Zeus bless the IT turds.

Harry_S_Truman January 23, 2012 at 7:22 pm

Needs more Waits.

Tundra Grifter January 23, 2012 at 7:25 pm

OK – I'll be the first.

Shulfer, Shulbad.

Warpde January 23, 2012 at 7:49 pm

Scott the ultimate Kock sucker. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQvNu8LoTo0&fe
……..Is that you Charles?

Callyson January 23, 2012 at 8:33 pm

JFC, I lasted all of thirteen seconds. This guy makes Ashcroft's "Let the Eagle Soar" sound good…

mathme January 23, 2012 at 8:47 pm

I assume that "Hidden Princess" is about the 11 year old girl he has hidden in the hole he dug in the basement.

mathme January 23, 2012 at 8:49 pm

I don't want to slander either of these terrific artists, but he sounds like either the lead singing of Barnes and Barnes (of "Fish Heads" fame) or um… the guy who sung "Pac-Man Fever."

buffalogal January 23, 2012 at 8:49 pm

This is a joke from the Stephanie Miller Show … right? Right? Right?

mathme January 23, 2012 at 9:21 pm

I expect to hear it all week.

riffin1 January 23, 2012 at 8:59 pm

What an amazing decomposition!

ttommyunger January 23, 2012 at 9:01 pm

This comment fell out of my ass when I tried to stand up for Governor Weak-eye.

mathme January 23, 2012 at 9:21 pm

Oh no! Walker prolapse!

WiscDad January 23, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Uhhh..,I live there and I'm a musician and know a lot of folks and I've never heard of this fuckstick, much less one of his stupid ass songs

rocktonsam January 23, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Charles Sykes is still on the radio?

CRIPES!

valgal2342 January 23, 2012 at 11:42 pm

My God that song is awful.

Negropolis January 24, 2012 at 1:13 am

I hit play and had to quit it 1:26 in.

I'm so glad you guys are about to correct your mistake, but it will forever be a mystery to me how this guy got in office.

L188188 January 24, 2012 at 10:14 am

I made it about :40.

mmeetoilenoir January 24, 2012 at 9:27 am

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHA. I almost choked on a mouthful of pancakes listening to that mess. I don't know what's worse: the weinie voice, or the completely horrendous writing. Wingnuts should NEVER try to be creative, because it just doesn't work.

BZ1 January 24, 2012 at 9:32 am

indicative of Walker's supporters? complete raving loons?

L188188 January 24, 2012 at 10:13 am

Hmmm… .rhyming "Walker" with "talker". I only wish Scottie's last name was Wucker so I could write my own song.

outragedcitizen January 24, 2012 at 12:45 pm

you just know he is dreaming/fantaizing about walker personally thanking him for this obvious platinum diddy. He gonna be sporting some seriously wood on that magic day.

glyph January 25, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Heard this about this "ballad" on the Stephanie Miller Show. This guy claims to be a Christian, but after watching "Union Man" one has to wonder.

The guy he opens with in that diatribe, was the guy that was on a hunger strike at the State Street corner of the Capitol Square in Madison. If memory serves, the guy was a Disabled VET.

Why are these guys such big _ricks
its cause they got tiny little _icks
I'm not done having my fun
I think they've got more short comings than one.

mrblifil February 27, 2012 at 2:59 pm

"Not too bright" pretty much says it all.

Blueb4sunrise January 23, 2012 at 6:38 pm

I blame reel-to-reel tape!!!!

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: