THIS BETTER GET ON THE EMMY SHORTLIST  6:10 pm January 20, 2012

Scott Walker Recall Webcam Wisconsin’s Favorite New TV Show

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

Already they have better nicknames than the idiots from Survivor.

Wisconsin’s latest craze in televised bloodsport (hey, just in time to fill the void left by the Packers’ playoff loss!) is a hawt new web show with just a single overhead camera starring the dozen or so people that the Government Accountability Board locks into a secret room at an undisclosed location in Madison each day to verify 1.9 million recall petition signatures one piece of paper, one line at a time. Tens of thousands of viewers have already been sucked in by the phenomenon and are tuning in to watch, rapt, as the painstaking process of ruining Scott Walker’s life slowly unfolds. Don’t let the fact that there’s no audio bother you, even — Twitter has made its own soundtrack and character names for the mystery workers!

Basically it’s Mad Men but with more civics:

And people can’t get enough of it! From AP:

Board spokesman Reid Magney, who has made cameo appearances on the cam, said at its busiest when it went online Wednesday around 400 people at the same time were watching it. By Thursday afternoon, after the tantalizing angle change, the webcam had logged 29,308 total visitors. The webcam is a first for [the Government Accountability Board] and is being provided free of charge to taxpayers by 5Nines.com of Madison, Magney said.

Magney, who acknowledged that watching the cam is as exciting as watching paint dry, was somewhat at a loss about its allure.

“People are interested in watching people do things, I guess,” he said.

Oh bless this fellow Magney, that is in fact what all television is about, but this is the only television where you get to watch the bricks going up one by one around Scott Walker’s reign of union-busting terror like the Cask of Amontillado. On Wisconsin! [AP via Wonkette operative "Monsieur Grumpe"]

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 399 comments }

nounverb911 January 20, 2012 at 6:14 pm

Is Katherine Harris back from Chad yet?

OneDollarJuana January 20, 2012 at 6:16 pm

Didn't know she was there. Just hanging around?

nounverb911 January 20, 2012 at 6:17 pm

She's collecting butterfly ballots.

littlebigdaddy January 20, 2012 at 6:20 pm

More to the point, did she ever go through with the sex change?

Chichikovovich January 20, 2012 at 6:53 pm

To judge from the last few photos I've seen, s/he's still transitioning.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 3:32 pm

I'll never get over that description of her that was on "Saturday Night Live":
"That bitch. She looks divorced."

Guppy January 20, 2012 at 6:38 pm

I could picture her as a pro-Qadaffi mercenary.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 20, 2012 at 6:41 pm

I miss her dimples.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 9:41 pm

Is that what they call them in your part of the country?

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 7:59 pm

No, Chad is still boinking her brains out.

Mahousu January 20, 2012 at 8:57 pm

That's not much of a challenge.

OzoneTom January 20, 2012 at 9:50 pm

Perhaps he's a little short-staffed.

Terry January 20, 2012 at 10:14 pm
SorosBot January 20, 2012 at 6:15 pm

Everybody's workin' for the recall; everybody's tryin' to find a new Gov'nor.

Barb January 20, 2012 at 6:27 pm

Everybody's praying for the creep's end
Everybody needs a second vote,

SorosBot January 20, 2012 at 6:54 pm

Thanks; that was a better rewrite than what I could come up with.

horsedreamer_1 January 20, 2012 at 6:57 pm

How 'bout — it's Friday (Friday!) committing voter fraud on Friday everybody's voting for the Lizard People?

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 8:00 pm

Republican Partyin' Partyin' (Yeah!) Partyin' Partyin' (Yeah!)

Barb January 20, 2012 at 7:02 pm

Awww, I would think that you would be impressed that I got the reference in the first place.

You do know I am a songwriter, right? At least my BFF and partner in songwriting says I am.

SorosBot January 20, 2012 at 7:12 pm

Didn't know that; that's awesome, Barb.

MittBorg January 20, 2012 at 9:10 pm

Doesn't surprise me in the least, darlin'. I knew you were something awesomely special the first time I laid eyes on your snark.

HistoriCat January 20, 2012 at 10:06 pm

Well, I was impressed.

Lascauxcaveman January 20, 2012 at 6:15 pm

Worst office-porno ever.

littlebigdaddy January 20, 2012 at 6:19 pm

Since Who's Nailin Pailin, at least.

nounverb911 January 20, 2012 at 6:20 pm

Newt?

barto January 20, 2012 at 6:22 pm

Wait wait! didn't someone just say "you look like you could use a massage"? my lip reading isn't that good…

nounverb911 January 20, 2012 at 6:15 pm

Well, it's something to do, now that the Packer's are out of the playoffs.

OneDollarJuana January 20, 2012 at 6:15 pm

I wonder if they'll get confused when they find more than one "Hitler" signature.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 6:30 pm

Then they'll have to figure out whether Lizard people and Dr. Emilio Lizardo are separate votes or votes for one person.

doloras January 20, 2012 at 6:32 pm

Laugh while you can, monkey boy!

Frisbeedawg January 20, 2012 at 7:18 pm

I feel so break up, I wanna go home!

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 8:35 pm

Whorfin, your overthruster's for shit! We're lost!

(I always felt sort of sorry for John Bigboote…a Lectroid who never got his due)

QwertyToo January 20, 2012 at 7:34 pm

I'm still hoping there is someone in the state named Mickey Maus that signed

mayor_quimby January 21, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Come on, y'all , I know we can squeeze a new Hitler men's outta this. Thinking caps on.

Goonemeritus January 20, 2012 at 6:16 pm

Ok I'll watch it but only until they bring Firefly back.

SorosBot January 20, 2012 at 6:25 pm
Generation[redacted] January 20, 2012 at 6:35 pm

What? You mean this isn't a petition to bring Firefly back? What did I sign???

Guppy January 20, 2012 at 6:41 pm

The last time people agitated for more Firefly, they killed off Shepherd and Wash. Have you learned nothing yet?

MissTaken January 20, 2012 at 6:45 pm

As long as the sexual tension triangle of Inara, Mal, and Saffron is there I will petition daily for more Firefly.

Guppy January 20, 2012 at 6:53 pm

And you're forgetting how the Inara/Mal/Nandi situation got "sorted out."

Firefly shipping kills!

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 7:13 pm

It looks like Arrested Development will go back into production–for Netflix, of all the crazy things. Could Firefly be far behind? Whedon has already done a web series, after all….

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 1:06 am

If they can add "Better off Ted", Netflix will outperform all the studios.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 9:48 pm

I heard they're bringing it back on Telemundo, but it's going to be called Spanishfly.

arihaya January 20, 2012 at 6:17 pm

I want a live webcam on Scott Walker when he learns how to count like a kindergarten kid

Callyson January 20, 2012 at 6:26 pm

"Commerce, Education, and um, um, um…"

SexySmurf January 20, 2012 at 6:18 pm

Ideas for improving it:

1. Hillbillies. By law every show must have at least one.

2. Investigation to see if Bigfoot signed the recall petition.

3. Two words: Mob Wives.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 6:24 pm

Reapers.

Fred_Wertham_Jr January 20, 2012 at 6:40 pm

I think you're allowed to substitute a Cajun for a Hillbilly now.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 6:44 pm

If you can nail down James Carville, you can have both.

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 8:02 pm

I agree with that last one. Like bacon, everything is made better by Mob Wives.

Monsieur_Grumpe January 21, 2012 at 8:51 am

Don't forget the token minority for comic relief.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 11:36 am

And if it's an action film, he dies first.

littlebigdaddy January 20, 2012 at 6:18 pm

Them's some tuff mofos. Got a honey badger as their office mascot.

ShaveTheWhales January 20, 2012 at 10:09 pm

Well, it is Wisconsin.

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 10:23 pm

Yep, the Honey Badger State.

CliveWarren January 20, 2012 at 6:18 pm

“People are interested in watching people do things, I guess”

That is basically why I watch porn, I guess.

sezme January 20, 2012 at 6:31 pm

Speaking of which, be sure to tune into this live feed after 2:00am Central Time. Boom-chick-a-wow-wow, if you know what I mean.

Loaded_Pants January 20, 2012 at 6:38 pm

Only if Sideburns is there. I'm a sucker for dark hair.

CliveWarren January 20, 2012 at 6:41 pm

I think I know what you mean… The will be a bass player, right?

I'll wank to that!

horsedreamer_1 January 20, 2012 at 6:58 pm

Bree Olson is a gob creator.

meatlofer January 20, 2012 at 6:20 pm

On Tuesdays,they watch the Kittens and Puppies get put to sleep.

ExecutorElassus January 20, 2012 at 6:22 pm

holy shit. It's image macros in real-time, with notes of apocalyptic inevitability and absurdist political comedy all in one. There's a Pandora station for it now, too.

This is some kind of Zen Koan, I'm sure of it. If we watch this enough, maybe we'll all achieve enlightenment.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 9:51 pm

Is Zen Koan anything like Ken Layne?

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 9:58 pm

I just realized that "Ken Layne" is an anagram of "El Kenyan"!!

We are down the rabbit hole, people.

ShaveTheWhales January 20, 2012 at 10:11 pm

Oh, this deserves wider distribution.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Or "Le Kenyan". Illegal or French? YOU decide!

ExecutorElassus January 20, 2012 at 10:29 pm

No, more like Alvin Greene. As Jack Stuef said about him – back in the day, before he went wherever he is now (writing about The Homosexuals?), when he was doing the Daily Briefing – "The Master arrives without leaving, sees the light without looking, and achieves without doing a thing."
If you watch the most asinine, inane thing – which coincidentally carries enormous political consequence – without any sensory input, it becomes the secret to enlightenment. Or, uh, surrealist sexcapades. You decide!

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 11:25 pm

Zen Koan? Hey, I knew that guy. He is a surfer dude from Santa Monica.

sezme January 20, 2012 at 6:22 pm

Sideburns, Flirty, and Stockton, it should be noted, are all proud members of the International Brotherhood of Petition Counters Local 3654. Kochsucker doesn't stand a chance.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 6:22 pm

"Allright! Whereinhell are Grumpy, Sneezy, Bashful n' Doc? I better not find 'em doin' one-hitters in the stockroom again!"

weej_bain January 20, 2012 at 6:43 pm

To do that all day ya'd have to be one toke over the line sweet Jeebus.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 6:51 pm

"ONE toke? The poor fool. Wait until he sees these goddamn Bats."

Radiotherapy January 20, 2012 at 6:23 pm

These must be the 250,000 jobs he promised to bring to Wisconsin.

Callyson January 20, 2012 at 6:23 pm

I recommend watching with some reggae in the background. Hypnotic.
Wow, maybe I need to get out more…

Spurning Beer January 20, 2012 at 6:36 pm

I watch everything with reggae in the background. Even porn.

Chichikovovich January 20, 2012 at 6:57 pm

What do you think Bob Marley and the Wailers were wailing about?

MittBorg January 20, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Vote-countin' gone wrong?

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 9:53 pm

Based on the rhythm, I always assumed that they were wailing about having one leg an inch shorter than the other.

sezme January 20, 2012 at 11:16 pm

No Walker, No Cry.

Jukesgrrl January 21, 2012 at 12:32 am

#1 with a bullet!

Barrelhse January 20, 2012 at 9:25 pm

Take a nice break and thumb through a couple of phone books.

Radiotherapy January 20, 2012 at 6:27 pm

You could get cross-eyed just watching that.

Chillwillard January 20, 2012 at 6:27 pm

Most meaningful SexyCam show ever.

imissopus January 20, 2012 at 6:29 pm

A "Cask of Amontillado" reference? KBJ really was an English major.

nounverb911 January 20, 2012 at 6:36 pm

Needs more bricks.

horsedreamer_1 January 20, 2012 at 6:58 pm

Roger Waters Libel.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 7:07 pm

You sure it's not Ignatz Mouse libel?

poncho_pilot January 21, 2012 at 2:43 am

that's what they told Ivan Denisovich.

Guppy January 20, 2012 at 6:43 pm

For the love of God!

Chichikovovich January 20, 2012 at 6:58 pm

A nice thought, but instead of "Scott Walker's Reign of Terror" in the Fortunato role, why not simplify and just make it "Scott Walker"?

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 7:03 pm

"For the Love of God, Montressor – it's a Hanging Chad!"

fuflans January 20, 2012 at 7:22 pm

i probably would have gone with 'fall of the house of usher' for my 'entombed alive' reference, but really, there is just nothing wrong with poe.

Requiescat In Pace! scott

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 8:06 pm

You really can't go wrong with him. The Tell-Tale Heart would have also sufficed.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 7:44 pm

Three, give the go-ahead for U.S.-based Mossad agents to take out a governor deemed unfriendly to organized labor, dismembering him and hiding his heart 'neath the floorboards.

KBoydJohnson January 20, 2012 at 8:28 pm

Worse… a history major.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 8:31 pm

NERD!!!!!!!!!!!

(I think I love you)

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 8:32 pm

And you don't have a Million Dollar job with Fannie Mae? Shame!

MittBorg January 20, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Apparently, you either need to *have* or *be* a dick to get those jobs. So sorry, KBJ doesn't qualify.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 10:00 pm

History is bunk.
But Kirsten's good for my funk.
Pdoggie is drunk.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 10:05 pm

Think I'll watch Monk
And give my donut a dunk
Cause that gal's got spunk.
(I fall over–THUNK!!)

bagofmice January 20, 2012 at 11:11 pm

I'll be in my bunk.

trampndirtdown January 20, 2012 at 11:48 pm

Ah it's friday lets get krunk.

Dudleydidwrong January 20, 2012 at 10:14 pm

At least one of us made good…

imissopus January 20, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Ironic, whenever I'm wallowing in regret over my film degree, history is one path I think I would have enjoyed pursuing. Oh well. Try commenting more often so we can get your p score up, I'm sure that will compensate.

Mumbletypeg January 21, 2012 at 10:43 am

Way to go, prompting KBJ to comment! — I imagine that would seem an achievement, at least I'd be sitting here beaming to myself about it~

Chet Kincaid January 21, 2012 at 2:36 am

Newt must infuriate you.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 3:44 pm

Safe guess, since Newt infuriates most people.

edgydrifter January 20, 2012 at 6:30 pm

All catastrophes are 1,000 times more awesome in super slow-motion. Fact.

MissTaken January 20, 2012 at 6:31 pm

Flirty and Sideburns are totes the Bates and Anna of Wisconsin.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 10:03 pm

Or the MasterBates and Johnson of Wisconsin.

cheetojeebus January 20, 2012 at 6:34 pm

I think I just saw a cameo by Wilfred Brimley?!

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 7:28 pm

Was he the guy who walked by, carrying a package that had all he needed for his Diabeetus?

cheetojeebus January 20, 2012 at 7:52 pm

OMG!1 U saw him 2!!11

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 7:57 pm

It's not just you. I just hope it's not that the Video feed is growing a new organ in our brains…

DahBoner January 21, 2012 at 11:29 am

Shag Hag.

ifthethunderdontgetya January 20, 2012 at 6:35 pm

And just when I was losing my faith in Democracy™³²®©!

*sniff*
~

Loaded_Pants January 20, 2012 at 7:04 pm

I must say that almost 2 million signatures is impressive. How much you wanna bet some Walker bots come out of the Koch factories to contest most of them?

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Just to be clear, it was just over a million, which is still unprecendented.

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 8:39 pm

I think 2 million was the total for all the different people they want to recall. There's like 5 of 'em, not just Walker. The "just over a million" is just for Walker I think.

Ayn Rand Paul Tard January 20, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Can we recall 2 million politicians?

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 10:09 pm

I hope I never lose my faith in vampire slayers.

sezme January 20, 2012 at 6:35 pm

I have to admit, this is pretty compelling stuff. I particularly like Southpaw "Lanyard" McChinbeard.

bumfug January 20, 2012 at 6:36 pm

Call me when the republican assault team gets there.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 1:56 am

Wait 'till the red Swingline stapler shows up on the table — that's when it's gonna get really interesting.

Spurning Beer January 20, 2012 at 6:40 pm

I would like to see Betty White join the cast as the wacky neighbor.

AlterNewt January 20, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Hawt.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 3:48 pm

Of any show, actually.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 20, 2012 at 6:44 pm

I keep waiting and waiting, and yet no one has removed their clothes yet. This is not what I've come to expect from web video!

tealsheart January 20, 2012 at 7:49 pm

Look closer, she's only using one hand for the counting, the other remains under the table. And why are different men taking turns sitting next to her?

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 20, 2012 at 6:45 pm

Are we sure this is the recount, and not some people processing orders for Ol' Milwaukee?

TeaNuts January 20, 2012 at 6:47 pm

HELLO Texas, Arizona, South Carolina, etc. Coming to a web cam near you!

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 7:29 pm

Will need Wide Field camera for those people.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 1:20 am

Don't get your hopes up … first you have to get the signatures, and then you have to find people who can count. These are big numbers, too … 99% of 'merkins have no experience with them.

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 6:50 pm

What if it never stops??

MissTaken January 20, 2012 at 6:52 pm

Fingers crossed!!

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 20, 2012 at 8:31 pm

What if Cats! is now and forever!!!!

Jukesgrrl January 20, 2012 at 6:51 pm

"People are interested in GETTING JUSTICE, I guess."

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Much better than in New Joisey, where they want to get Christie love.

Jukesgrrl January 21, 2012 at 12:37 am

Not any more from what I hear. They have have Christie-sized regret.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 11:41 am

Wow–you may have named the only TV show of the 70's that hasn't been badly remade by Hollywood (yet).

Bluestatelibel January 20, 2012 at 6:51 pm

So basically the American people really have very little to do throughout the day, don't they?

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 7:22 pm

And on into the night as well. These workers are heroes. (Sniff. Got… a little somethin' in my eye.)

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 7:32 pm

You ask this on Wonkette?

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 6:54 pm

What if this is really Videodrome and all our brains start to mutate?

Naked_Bunny January 20, 2012 at 6:59 pm

I can watch the webcam while I'm fishing on WoW. SUURGE!

Fare la Volpe January 20, 2012 at 9:43 pm

Productivity Inaction!

horsedreamer_1 January 20, 2012 at 7:00 pm

Democracy in Wisconsin is still not as transparent as the 1%'s psychopathy.

JackDempsey1 January 20, 2012 at 7:01 pm

twitter entry: "Bald Stockton has spent the last hour trying to figure out how to steer the conversation to Game of Thrones."

They don't have *at least* one power-mad, oversexed dwarf as an employee? I smell class action lawsuit.

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 7:01 pm

Is anyone else fixated on Pearls right now? It feels wrong.

rickmaci January 20, 2012 at 7:22 pm

…but so right !

Monsieur_Grumpe January 21, 2012 at 8:43 am

You know there are several hundred men and a couple women out there fapping away to her page turning.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 7:05 pm

The thousand injuries of Scott Walker I had borne as I best could, but when he ventured upon union-busting, I vowed revenge.

poncho_pilot January 21, 2012 at 2:52 am

The wine sparkled in his dead eyes and the bells jingled.

Walkinwiddaking January 20, 2012 at 7:08 pm

The yule log video they show on Christmas Eve is much more compelling.

Jukesgrrl January 21, 2012 at 12:38 am

But it isn't a job creator.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 3:51 pm

Huh huh huh, you said "log".

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 7:16 pm

Some angry pit bulls would spice things up nicely. (BTW is this a liveblog or what?)

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 8:03 pm

It's a liveblog about nothing!

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 8:29 pm

No, that's a liveblogging.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 10:15 pm

I feel like I'm getting liveflogged.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 1:33 am

By Bulgarians … so let it pass.

DerrickWildcat January 20, 2012 at 7:18 pm

I Do Think There's A Squatch In These Woods

Blueb4sunrise January 20, 2012 at 7:18 pm

Fifty bucks the Smails kid picks his nose.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 7:22 pm

I'll take some of that action.

Look! He's goin' for it!

alzronnie January 20, 2012 at 7:22 pm

Wisconsin could create jobs right now by hiring thousands of the unemployed to help with the counting. They get a paycheck and Walker gets canned: win-win.

fuflans January 20, 2012 at 7:23 pm

you know, i get the feeling people really don't like governor scott walker.

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 7:25 pm

MOVE IT BALDSPOT YOUR BLOCKING PEARLS

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 7:30 pm

The left-handed male, who I am calling "Chinbeard," is adept in the manipulation of simple tools, such as pencils and post-it notes. Although a female, "Pearl," sits near him, he has not so far initiated any courtship behaviours. While some might interpret this as an indication of sexual inversion (Hagee 2004), this apparent lack of interest may simply indicate that she is not currently in estrus.

———–
(nicknames cheerfully stolen from others)

Fare la Volpe January 20, 2012 at 9:37 pm

Speaking as someone who had to slog through buckets full of primate studies in undergrad, I love you.

Chet Kincaid January 21, 2012 at 2:42 am

You got to watch "The Real World" for credit?!

Jukesgrrl January 21, 2012 at 12:40 am

Marlin Perkins in the house?

Schmannnity January 20, 2012 at 7:32 pm

KOCH KAM

Jukesgrrl January 20, 2012 at 8:27 pm

Let's hope it's the Kock-block Kam.

Extemporanus January 20, 2012 at 7:38 pm

I painted that room.

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 7:39 pm

That foreign-looking one is up to no good, I just know it. And that fat one keeps blocking the camera, what's that about? Is he stuffing petitions into his trousers?

Rotundo_ January 20, 2012 at 7:42 pm

This is Wisconsin in winter we're talking about here. Most bars close around two in the morning and ice fishin' and going from bar to bar on snowmachines are the only other things to do that are worth doing. Watching the pile of signatures grow is pretty exciting by our standards. It's the first time a governor has been held accountable for his actions here, we're pretty psyched eh?

fuflans January 20, 2012 at 8:57 pm

rotundo (speaking as a resident of IL – and we know what you call us) i can say with some conviction that no one down here is making fun of WI anymore.

MittBorg January 20, 2012 at 9:25 pm

Good on ya, for getting it done!

DahBoner January 21, 2012 at 11:15 am

Bars close at 2?

Where do people go then to continue drinking????

owhatever January 20, 2012 at 7:44 pm

I warned her not to pick her nose and wipe the finger under her chair. I warned her.

Blueb4sunrise January 20, 2012 at 7:46 pm

Dude tells Pearls, "Hey look! Wonkette!!!!"

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 7:47 pm

Poor Gray Hoody–he looks bored.

EDIT 15 minutes later: I knew it! He's gone now–he just wanted to go home.

EDITED EDIT 45 minutes later: Oh, he's back. Just went to dinner or something. No wonder he was fidgety.

Christ, this is fascinating….I think he just checked his text messages or maybe fed his Tamagotchi.

Blueb4sunrise January 20, 2012 at 7:52 pm

Can someone get a lollipop for Pearls?

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Pearls looks like she wants to give Jenny Craig a lollipop, judging by the many extended smiles.

Dudleydidwrong January 20, 2012 at 10:23 pm

How about a banana?

Monsieur_Grumpe January 21, 2012 at 8:53 am

And a trampoline.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 3:55 pm

"Can someone get a lollipop for Pearls?"

*sound of 1000 male wonketteers unzipping pants*

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 7:56 pm

This looks like a very bad knock-off of The Office, but maybe Honey Badger could make it salveagable.

rickmaci January 20, 2012 at 7:57 pm

The guy on the front left is playing Game of Thrones but has his printer set to churn out pages and pages of paper so it looks like he is counting.

MilwaukeeKent January 20, 2012 at 8:04 pm

I watched it for a little while. I like to watch things on TV.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 8:08 pm

Hi Chauncy!

Monsieur_Grumpe January 21, 2012 at 8:54 am

Being There reference! +1

C_R_Eature January 21, 2012 at 9:08 am

Thanks! Didn't know if anyone else would "get" that one, but it amused me.

I swear, that film was all I could think about for the last 8 years when W did/said something stupid. Which was all too frequent.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 11:56 am

Now there's nothing left for him but the room upstairs.

Blueb4sunrise January 20, 2012 at 8:18 pm

Lou.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 8:31 pm

Ladies and Gentlemen, the Next President of the Unites States!

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 8:49 pm

Uh…we already did that. Remember how it turned out?

Blueb4sunrise January 21, 2012 at 11:07 am

Why I said Lou, for those that thought I was just deranged/drunk.

Slightly different line than the Velvet's version.

Satellite of Love

Sharkey January 21, 2012 at 11:50 am

Things like that drive
me out of my mind.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 3:56 pm

I like money.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 8:09 pm

When's the Brooks Brothers Riot scheduled for?

I'm going to set my alarm.

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Where it the nudity? I was told this signature verification process was clothing optional. Why has no one chosen that option? These are questions.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 1:37 am

Wisconsin, January, and … umm … oops. Sorry.

poncho_pilot January 21, 2012 at 2:58 am

yeah, i was in Sun Prairie yesterday and it was 2 degrees out.

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Needz moar Yakety Sax.

Monsieur_Grumpe January 21, 2012 at 8:56 am

After they're done we can watch it again at high speed!

Negropolis January 21, 2012 at 11:56 pm

Benny Hill reference FTW

Jukesgrrl January 20, 2012 at 8:30 pm

Only two people there now. If they're going home for the weekend, the locks they put on that place better be kryptonite. I wouldn't even trust a guard. They can be bought.

OzoneTom January 20, 2012 at 10:05 pm

Even (especially) if they are Kryptonite locks, just let a little WI breeze waft across them for a couple of minutes and you can shatter them with a sledgehammer.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 10:24 pm

I just turned it on and they must be undergoing a second wind – five people sitting and some old balding guy blocking the view.

ElPinche January 20, 2012 at 8:31 pm

Can't we just recall Scott Walker the old fashioned way , by hostile takeover followed by guillotine funtime ?

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 10:15 pm

Where should we set up the guillotine? Miller Park in Milwaukee or Camp Randall in Madison?

imissopus January 20, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Dude, it's Wisconsin. Lambeau Field, obvs.

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 10:45 pm

Total brain fart. How in the hell did I forget Lambeau Field?

imissopus January 20, 2012 at 11:01 pm

I presume you're a Lions fan and thus Lambeau Field has negative associations for you, so your brain blocks all thoughts of it for the sake of both your physical and emotional health.

Now I'm picturing NFL Films filming Scott Walker meeting a guillotine in the middle of Lambeau – multiple angles, slow-motion shots of the blade dropping and his head skittering across the field, the announcer with that sonorous voice saying something like, "Skulls bounce high off the frozen tundra at Lambeau, even the skulls of subvocal mongoloids like Governor Scott Walker when he met his fate on a field once stalked by giants like Lombardi and Starr…"

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 8:33 pm

Whoa, Jenny Craig just gave Chinbeard Lanyard the what-for.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 8:41 pm

Okay, it's been an hour and no one's gotten nut punched, set on fire, jumped out of a window or vomited.

Worst episode of Tosh.0 ever.

Ayn Rand Paul Tard January 20, 2012 at 8:52 pm

He's just going through an 'artsy' phase. I bet before it's over someone drops a deuce on one of the desks.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 8:57 pm

Well, that's a relief. Maybe they'll hold a Guacamole and Ipecac challenge.

fuflans January 20, 2012 at 8:49 pm

where do the lizard people stand on all this?

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 8:56 pm

On the NECKS OF HARDWORKING AMERICANS!!!!!!!!!

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Slide 'em a box of Guinea Pigs and they'll do anything you want.

OzoneTom January 20, 2012 at 10:09 pm

Are they active in Wisconsin? I thought that they were only a power in Minnesota.

One more reason to be hopeful about the future, I suppose.

SorosBot January 21, 2012 at 10:20 am

Well according to David Icke, they're a power everywhere; the British royal family and the Bushes, among others, are really reptilian aliens in human disguise.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 4:00 pm

"the British royal family and the Bushes, among others, are really reptilian aliens in human disguise"

Where would he get such an idea? By looking at photos of them, or by the inept way they imitate human life forms?

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 10:22 pm

Why, on all fours, of course…that is, at least while us humans aren't watching.

Jukesgrrl January 21, 2012 at 12:23 am

I didn't know they stood. I thought they slithered.

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 8:56 pm

All that 4LOKO is probably gonna make Chinbeard's breath smell.

ttommyunger January 21, 2012 at 6:06 pm

Never forget, bad breath is better than no breath at all.

Bluestatelibel January 20, 2012 at 9:02 pm

Enough of this bullshit, we need Mitt Romney and Bain Capital to come in and fire these sluggards… one person in China could do all the work for one-tenth the price, and those PCs are worth good money, plus the small mammal. And that chick in front looks lie she's falling asleep, lazy communist hippie. Thanks, and remember to pay my $250 K consulting fee.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 9:13 pm

This entire Recount can be shipped to Afghanistan and no one has lost any.

emmelemm January 20, 2012 at 9:49 pm

Without a doubt…

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 9:53 pm

Yeah, all these people are Worthly Skum. Anyhow.

Mahousu January 20, 2012 at 9:04 pm

Wait a sec – 5Nines.com? That is, 9-9-9-9-9? Herman Cain, you devil! This and the Colbert business- what are you trying to pull?

BaldarTFlagass January 20, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Your move, Andy Warhol.

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Uh oh, paper jam in aisle 3.

Sharkey January 20, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Post-its come in more colors than just pink, ya know.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Commie post-it notes come only in pink.

OKthennext January 20, 2012 at 9:49 pm

That's some boring shit. However, it is like a little United Nations in there at this moment. Which is kinda awesome.

Extemporanus January 20, 2012 at 9:52 pm

I believe that the color is called "White".

fitley January 20, 2012 at 10:00 pm

I'm curious as to how many Mike Hunt signatures they got. But that's just me.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 4:05 pm

A few more than, "Hugh Jass", "Al Coholic", and "Ura Snotball", but many more than, "I'm a big fat stupid moron, with an ugly face, and a big butt, and my butt smells, and I like to kiss my own butt".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4uC38yp-iI

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 10:03 pm

I'm watching Rachel Maddow now and she's an Awesome bartender.

She just rescued an errant egg yolk from a mixed drink tumbler (Whites Only!) during the construction of something called a "Millionaire" cocktail. That ain't easy.

Also, she said "Frothy." Huh huh huh, huh huh.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Everybody's wimped out, huh? No posts for the previous 28 minutes. Too bad you all missed the female streaker!

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 10:44 pm

I thought that was Wilford Brimley.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 11:08 pm

OK, now I won't be able to sleep tonight.

C_R_Eature January 20, 2012 at 11:12 pm

Bwa ha ha!

Steverino247 January 20, 2012 at 10:44 pm

An elf just came in with another stack of paper for Pearl…

Steverino247 January 20, 2012 at 10:45 pm

I wonder if Pearl's hubby is whacking off to this webcam?

Spurning Beer January 20, 2012 at 10:53 pm

This reminds me of Jennycam. Man, that seems like a long time ago.

HistoriCat January 21, 2012 at 7:50 am

It was a different internet back then my friend – free and open. *sigh*

mayor_quimby January 21, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Dude, you are like 124 in internet years! Me too, actually.

Extemporanus January 20, 2012 at 10:55 pm

It took me about four hours.

Barrelhse January 21, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Try stroking faster….

Spurning Beer January 20, 2012 at 11:01 pm

I take it back. This is more like one of those puppy-cams or eagle-cams.

DerrickWildcat January 20, 2012 at 11:10 pm

I think this is a very hard game of Dungeons and Dragons.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 11:12 pm

Needs C-Span commentary to make it even more soporific.

Spurning Beer January 20, 2012 at 11:17 pm

Boner would pull the plug on that shit pronto. Transparency and a free press are all well and good, but the job-killing Obama administration is placing an unprecedented burden on the American people, and they're not going to put up with it any longer.

trampndirtdown January 20, 2012 at 11:58 pm

The callers screeching about ACORN!!! might be entertaining.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 11:17 pm

Somebody needs to go out and bring back a box of flag pins.

Spurning Beer January 20, 2012 at 11:20 pm

Flag pins, Cool Ranch Doritos, and Diet Sierra Mist.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 11:21 pm

Don’t let the fact that there’s no audio bother you

I love hi-deafinition video.

sezme January 20, 2012 at 11:29 pm

BREAKING: Pearls' pen just ran out of ink, and Lanyard flung a new one at her from across the table. The sexual tension is palpable. I wonder how much weight that table can hold.

Spurning Beer January 20, 2012 at 11:47 pm

It looks to me like Scarf-face with the streaked hair and tights who flounces in and bends over the table might be the one who puts out. She looks like she's maybe 120, 125 tops. Lanyard doesn't look too heavy, either.

Now, if Toupee gets some action, the tables could give way. I understand the floor is rated to three tons, though.

Jesus, this is getting hot.

flamingpdog January 20, 2012 at 11:42 pm

Maybe if I went and got my high-powered binoculars and turned out all the lights in the house, watching this would be more exciting.

poncho_pilot January 21, 2012 at 3:03 am

needs moar Jimmy Stewart.

BarackMyWorld January 20, 2012 at 11:51 pm

This is just like "The Office" back when it was good.

Radiotherapy January 21, 2012 at 12:05 am

Worst. Bukkake. Ever.

Extemporanus January 21, 2012 at 12:12 am

Actually, now that I think about it, it was probably more like six.

ShaveTheWhales January 21, 2012 at 12:15 am

Painting?

Radiotherapy January 21, 2012 at 12:43 am

Yeah, that Viagra is strong, you must have sprained your wrist.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 1:46 am

Should have called his doctor, no?

BTW, does anyone know what the heck the doctor is supposed to do? (My doctor is sort of cute, and she might be able to help, but in general …??)

poncho_pilot January 21, 2012 at 3:04 am

they apply leeches to remove the bad blood.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 5:53 am

You know a solution is excellent, when the mere thought of it is enough to solve the problem.

flamingpdog January 21, 2012 at 3:04 am

She'll send you to a specialist – Dr. Lorena Bobbit.

Extemporanus January 21, 2012 at 1:12 am

Now just what the heck are you two talking about?

My apologies if you somehow missed part of my story. I'll start over and go a liitle bit slower so that you can keep up…

Extemporanus January 21, 2012 at 1:13 am

Anyway, as I was saying, I painted that room.

Radiotherapy January 21, 2012 at 1:18 am

Dear Penthouse, I never thought this could happen to me, I had just dropped out of college, and I was painting a room….

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 1:47 am

Looks like you missed a spot, over there on the right.

BarackMyWorld January 21, 2012 at 1:41 am

OT: Has anyone seen anyone in the media deconstruct Newt's tantrum from Thursday night for logic/factual accuracy? All the reporting I have seen on it has either heaped praise on his agility and/or condemned John King for asking the question.

Is anyone examining his answer point by point?

For example, how the role his daughters played in trying to get ABC to not air the interview isn't remotely relevant since Newt and Marianne Gingrich never had any children together?

What about how Gingrich is accusing the press of helping Obama by attacking him, even though there were three other Republicans on that stage who are not Obama, but would also like to see his campaign collapse?

Negropolis January 21, 2012 at 2:23 am

None of that matters. Debates are pure stagecraft; his answer doesn't have to make sense so long as it sounds good, and boy, it can not be denied that he hit that out of the park no matter how illogical the answer actually was.

BarackMyWorld January 21, 2012 at 4:18 am

My mind refuses to abandon logic that easily. It's like my brain is Rick Grimes and logic is Sophia, and Newt's rant is zombies and Wonkette is the barn.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 10:26 am

Ah. I don't know how closely the TV series will follow the comic, but without any spoilers, I can assure you that your brain shouldn't get too attached to anyone or anything.

SorosBot January 21, 2012 at 10:05 am

And um, isn't the media hurting Obama by attacking Gingrich, who Obama would simply destroy in the general election?

BarackMyWorld January 21, 2012 at 11:55 am

And there's that….

mayor_quimby January 21, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Yeah, I noticed that shit. Who brings their daughters into a open marriage discussion with their stepmom? Why would they have any idea? It is an APPALING line of reasoning.
The moderator should have said 'I'm waiting for an answer, you sanctimonious asshole'

Chet Kincaid January 21, 2012 at 2:38 am

Mittens just wandered in, whispering about Income Inequality.

Chet Kincaid January 21, 2012 at 2:46 am

Are objects or people going to start flying around and smashing into things? Stigmata outbreaks? 13 year old girls scuttling across the ceiling like crabs? That is the only reason to have a webcam.

poncho_pilot January 21, 2012 at 3:07 am

maybe something like this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35U255Si7C0

flamingpdog January 21, 2012 at 3:09 am

Oh, looks like everybody's gone home for the night. Lots of free computer hardware for the taking, Wisconisin Wonketeers!

gurukalehuru January 21, 2012 at 3:25 am

I just took a peek, still shot of an empty room. Fucking time zones.

SudsMcKenzie January 21, 2012 at 5:24 am

Its like looking at an African water hole.

gigamod January 21, 2012 at 4:03 am

Honey Badger don't care! Thanks, Wonkette, for existing. Been a lurker for a while, now registered. Spent some time lately mucking through Daily Caller, Wash Times, and Faux News, and their comments. I has a sad for America.

gigamod January 21, 2012 at 4:33 am

Honey Badger don't care! Thanks, Wonkette. Spent the day in Daily Caller, Fox, and Wash Times comments. I now has a sad for America. Wonkette is my heroin relief. Danke.

SudsMcKenzie January 21, 2012 at 5:30 am

No, you're not dreaming! It's your name! We made the front page!

Vassili Zaitsev:Enemy at the Front Gates

SaintRond January 21, 2012 at 5:38 am

Here's another really swell cam I can spend hours at practicing my Zen, showing rats 24/7 at the Oregon Museum of Science & Industry. http://www.omsi.edu/ratcam

Peace… God bless…

Beanball January 21, 2012 at 8:36 am

I'm watching this at 5:30 AM PST. A room devoid of life, nothing stirs, just the silence of the utilitarian chairs, folding picnic tables, industrial cinder block walls, monitors awaiting their morning jolt of electricity.

Watching this reminds me of Warhol's Empire, but minus the pretty clouds.

Monsieur_Grumpe January 21, 2012 at 8:38 am

Riveting no?

Monsieur_Grumpe January 21, 2012 at 9:10 am

Hey everybody! They're coming back! Where's my popcorn!!!!!111!

JackDempsey1 January 21, 2012 at 9:16 am

It could use a play-by-play guy, so that you know when to return to the action. Nothing crass ("Hey Chinbeard, this Bud's for you.") More hushed and golf-y. Something that respects the mise-en-scene.

weej_bain January 21, 2012 at 9:37 am

Five nines meh. We want six nines accuracy to make sure Walker's lynching recall is assured.

Harry_S_Truman January 21, 2012 at 9:38 am

I have now sullied myself in the seedy world of campaign super pacs (Americans for a Better Tomorrow Tomorrow). I feel so dirty. Now can I vote for Herman Cain?

Blueb4sunrise January 21, 2012 at 10:51 am

Needs song:
Hot For Recall Petition Verifiers

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 10:55 am

Heh… from the twitterz of last night:

I will give $100 to the first person on @recallcam to bring in a red Swingline stapler and set it on the table in the middle of the room.

someone's gonna start writing recallcam fan fic, I fear!…."They reached for the scanner, and as their fingers met, she felt his warm touch and knew she would be safe in his sideburns."

"My loins burned with 1.9 million tiny fires that only her embrace could extinguish"

ifthethunderdontgetya January 21, 2012 at 10:59 am

NBC's Chuck Todd Toad lit into Stephen Colbert on Thursday, accusing the Comedy Central host of corrupting the political process with his presidential run and Super PAC in South Carolina.

No wonder I was losing my faith in Democracy™³²®©!

Where's a bear when you need one?
~

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 11:04 am

How dare that jackanapes and his fans treat the democratic process like some kind of circus sideshow!

As anyone who's paying attention knows, the democratic process is more accurately described as tranny midget snuff porn.

BarackMyWorld January 21, 2012 at 12:00 pm

Someone inform Chuck that ship has sailed.

And it was called Titanic.

C_R_Eature January 21, 2012 at 12:18 pm

The time's long past when I've listened to anything that came out of that pigweasel Mediaostitute's mouth that I didn't assume was carefully crafted to fit into the "Conventional Wisdom that All the Cool Kids Want To Hear" Box so that he can keep up his fantastically lucrative Day Job, TV spots and Speaking Engagements.

It's why people get into political journalism, after all.

What? You thought it was to inform the public?!
Ah, Ha hahahahahahahaahahahahahaha!! Ho. ho. hehehe. *gasp* *cough, cough*

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 7:02 pm

"corrupting the political process with his presidential run and Super PAC in South Carolina."

Does Upptiy Chuck actually believe that Colbert created this problem?

Blueb4sunrise January 21, 2012 at 11:03 am

Tell 'em about it Freddie.

Big Leg Woman

Dashboard Buddha January 21, 2012 at 11:03 am

I was going to say that instead of a new election, they should just put Honey Badger down Walker's pants…but I reckon that Honey Badger doesn't give a shit*!

*How many times has that joke been made?

mayor_quimby January 21, 2012 at 1:54 pm

It does not matter. I still love all things honey badger related.

Blueb4sunrise January 21, 2012 at 11:09 am

Ratings slump switch.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 11:14 am

What were the producers thinking? There's no way the viewers will ever warm to this new "Cousin Oliver" character.

DahBoner January 21, 2012 at 11:13 am

Odd!

These people appear to be working.

This would imply there are jobs in America…

Chichikovovich January 21, 2012 at 11:30 am

Turns out Walker's a job creator after all.

Sharkey January 21, 2012 at 12:29 pm

The unions haven't gotten to them yet.

QwertyToo January 21, 2012 at 4:30 pm

That's because all the union thugs signed the petitions which means they weren't allowed to apply for these wonderful Scott Walker created jobs.

MissTaken January 21, 2012 at 11:15 am

Oh my god! Now there's a YELLOW post-it!

Blueb4sunrise January 21, 2012 at 11:21 am

What's it say?

MissTaken January 21, 2012 at 11:23 am

It's just a bunch of numbers: 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, and 42

Hold me, I'm scared.

Blueb4sunrise January 21, 2012 at 11:44 am

It's the sign of the Powerball Beast.

Steverino247 January 21, 2012 at 11:47 am

Go play them in tonight's CA Lotto and see if WI's good fortune rubs off on you. 8)

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 11:50 am

Looks like your reference was Lost on many folks…

SorosBot January 21, 2012 at 11:58 am

Don't listen to Steverino; don't play those numbers, they're cursed!

Also, I hold you.

Steverino247 January 21, 2012 at 12:05 pm

Curses! Foiled again!

HistoriCat January 21, 2012 at 3:50 pm

"Also, I hold you."

Wisconsin's not the only place with hawt undertones.

Chet Kincaid January 21, 2012 at 2:06 pm

They forgot to enter The Numbers!! Here comes Smokie!!

Biff January 21, 2012 at 12:00 pm

NOT PENNY'S BOAT!

C_R_Eature January 21, 2012 at 11:23 am

Uh oh! We Are So Fucked.

C_R_Eature January 21, 2012 at 11:34 am

Outstanding!

Names can backfire, though, as my friends withe their dog "Hurricane" found out…

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 11:48 am

When my Married Lover got me a betta fish in October 2009, I expected he'd last a few months at most, and so I named him Flushy. Little bastard lived until last summer.

C_R_Eature January 21, 2012 at 12:04 pm

See what I mean!

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 1:00 pm

Maybe I should change the new fish's name from Darth Betta (Dark Lord of the Fiss) to "Gingrich For President (and I Hope Not To Win the Lottery)" ?

C_R_Eature January 21, 2012 at 1:05 pm

Yes, immediately. And don't forget to forget to work UN Ambassador Palin into the name, too.

BarackMyWorld January 21, 2012 at 11:57 am

PC Load Letter? What the fuck does that mean?

BarackMyWorld January 21, 2012 at 11:59 am

I hope we get something resembling a SC liveblog later. The pure brilliance of this comments section needs to go (further) uncorrupted.

Steverino247 January 21, 2012 at 12:08 pm

We may have to pervert this thread to that purpose. But no deviated preversions, though.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ud9zBKJJQe4

C_R_Eature January 21, 2012 at 12:25 pm

As long as I don't have to answer to the Cocoa-Cola Company, I'm game.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 1:04 pm

It's no "pretty good weekend in Vegas", but sure, I'm in…

Biff January 21, 2012 at 12:03 pm

Hey, it's caucus day here in Nevaduh, too. At least for the Dems, who as we all know already have their nominee, so I don't much get why all the bullshit. It's a crappy day outside, I really don't want to go anywhere, but I guess it's my duty to run the gauntlet of Paultards that are most certainly going to be there, as assuredly as the Westboro Baptist "Church" appears at the funerals of dead USAmerican soldiers…

SorosBot January 21, 2012 at 12:26 pm

So who does everyone lust after most? For me it's the girl with the dark hair and glasses in the striped shirt; though I'd guess most of the mens would go for the blonde with the huge … tracts of land.

C_R_Eature January 21, 2012 at 12:39 pm

The Honey Badger's mine. Back off, Man Machine Everyone!

Biff January 21, 2012 at 12:50 pm

A waiflike creature just appeared from the right side of the view that I hereby lay claim to.

Biff January 21, 2012 at 12:53 pm

And she's gone.

Sharkey January 21, 2012 at 12:52 pm

The blonde needs a name … I'm calling her "Tammi", with a heart over the "i".

MissTaken January 21, 2012 at 1:04 pm

I'm enjoying Oscar and his oral fixation

MissTaken January 21, 2012 at 4:10 pm

Watch put Soros, Sweater Vest is making a play for your girl Stripes. I guess boys do make passes at girls who wear glasses.

SorosBot January 21, 2012 at 4:17 pm

It does look like they're getting flirty there, doesn't it? Let's cheer those two cute kids on; they might be this show's Sam and Diane.

And I love glasses; they make a cute girl even cuter to me. Well as long as they're decent glasses; even the most attractive woman won't look good in those giant old people's glasses.

MissTaken January 21, 2012 at 4:27 pm

Hmmm….good to know.

SorosBot January 21, 2012 at 4:54 pm

Aw now she's gone and it's just a sausage fest in there, and I haz a sad. But there's a good deal of man-candy for you.

lulzmonger January 21, 2012 at 12:43 pm

Gosh, this looks like it could take a really long time.
Guess I'm going to have to pace myself.

(fap ………… fap ………… fap ………… fap ………… fap …………)

johnnyzhivago January 21, 2012 at 12:46 pm

Newt in the lead is hard to believe – until – I think of the people I know who moved to S.C.

Sharkey January 21, 2012 at 12:55 pm

Here's a labelled pic of the night shift, sort of a follow up to the pic at the top of this Wonkett page. (I didn't make it, it's buried in the twitter feed.)

ThundercatHo January 21, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Yuck, hunchy guy in commando sweater was just picking his face and sniffing his fingers. They need to put a sticky note on their monitors "Don't pick your nose or anything gross since you are ON CAMERA, LIVE!"

ThundercatHo January 21, 2012 at 1:06 pm

OT: Anybody hear about the cat who was shot right through its whole body (shoulder blades) and survived? The vet who performed the surgery to remove the arrow has named the cat "Cupid". Now there is a sick sense of humor we can all appreciate.

Chichikovovich January 21, 2012 at 1:16 pm

Not bad, though I would have gone for "Saint Sebastian" myself.

HuddledMass January 21, 2012 at 1:45 pm

Oooo, there was a little meeting, and then they all left. What am I going to do with my Saturday?

Wait they're back, laying out piles of work! Yay! Let the games recommence…

Sharkey January 21, 2012 at 1:50 pm

If it's yellow, let it mellow.

ifthethunderdontgetya January 21, 2012 at 1:54 pm

News:

Gingrich Surging From Behind!, he snickered.
~

weej_bain January 21, 2012 at 2:21 pm

There's libel to santorum (santorum lible??) all over the LSM if Gingrich neuters Mittens in the Palmetto State today. What would be next, Ron Paul giving the other three orange suppositories in Florida?

SaintRond January 21, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Go here instead. All the action you'll ever want.
http://www.omsi.edu/ratcam

Peace… God bless…

weej_bain January 21, 2012 at 2:25 pm

I'd say there otter be a law, but iffin' I did, I'd likely get banhammered.

Steverino247 January 21, 2012 at 3:17 pm

I've been to both of those museums. Very cool stuff!

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 4:47 pm

Come on now … we're here because we DON'T want to see the GOP candidates.

Extemporanus January 21, 2012 at 2:30 pm

SORTED

Biff January 21, 2012 at 3:55 pm

Tried to liveblog my caucus, but there was no wifi or 4G service and my phone went all re+arded on me. Windy as hell, trees down, my BBQ down, parts of my roof gone, and what may be the worst thing, Paul yardsigns down. Oh, the humanity…

fuckin' administrator, anyway

HistoriCat January 21, 2012 at 3:55 pm

I like Green Sweater with Glasses Girl – she's my pick.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 4:44 pm

Absolutely … skinny girls with glasses are the wildest. Just ask your imagination.

Soylent Green January 21, 2012 at 4:18 pm

Still slightly better than Downton Abbey.

Warpde January 21, 2012 at 4:29 pm

And here I thought Internet Porn was the only thing that could get me off.

MissTaken January 21, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Do not get too attached to Red Shirt. You KNOW he will be killed off first.

Biff January 21, 2012 at 5:11 pm

Upfist for Star Trek reference.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 4:54 pm

Does anybody know how, exactly, they "verify" a signature, while sitting in this room? I mean, you can probably find out that a registered voter with that name lives at that address … is that really all it takes? Because you know ACORN would just totally own these people.

ttommyunger January 21, 2012 at 6:12 pm

Needz Chuck Todd and Lindsay Graham doing the blow-by-blow, heh, heh.

MittBorg January 21, 2012 at 6:58 pm

Aww, baybee! Is this to make up to me for cheating on me with that slut? All is forgiven, come home, Li'l Biff! (Hugs teh Biff)

Blueb4sunrise January 21, 2012 at 7:39 pm

Is that Wite-Out they left on the table?

Designer_Rants January 22, 2012 at 1:20 am

I want to know more about Flirty. And did Sideburns sit next to her, or did she sit next to him? Also, it's reeeeally unprofessional to let Honey Badger walk on the signature stacks. Honey Badger doesn't give a fuck.

Sharkey January 22, 2012 at 11:53 am

Who gave them Sunday off? I will not rest until I get an answer.

Sharkey January 24, 2012 at 12:47 pm

Wow, Week 02 already!! Time flies…

Barb January 20, 2012 at 7:18 pm

He tossed a song over to me the other day and I couldn't do anything with it. He write it on his own and called it "Farting in the Shower" I had nothing to add to it, lol. http://www.reverbnation.com/play_now/11822988

Ayn Rand Paul Tard January 20, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Oh, this is perfect for a nine year old's mind. My son will like it too!

MittBorg January 20, 2012 at 9:12 pm

I love it! It's so fucking rude!

Dudleydidwrong January 20, 2012 at 10:08 pm

Oh, that is wickedly wonderful. The next big US hit!

Designer_Rants January 22, 2012 at 8:28 am

The internet has shown me that I'm not the only one who didn't outgrow fart jokes. Had to share that on facebook, excellent!

MittBorg January 20, 2012 at 9:15 pm

BigBooTAY!!!

MittBorg January 20, 2012 at 9:20 pm

And do the same thing to them as we do to recalled cars? Why not?

Barb January 20, 2012 at 9:32 pm

Thanks! You are very kind.

MittBorg January 20, 2012 at 9:48 pm

Oh, Lady of Teh Massive P-Ness! All Hail.

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 20, 2012 at 10:08 pm
Barb January 20, 2012 at 11:02 pm

Thanks HistoriCat.

Negropolis January 20, 2012 at 11:22 pm

I presume you're a Lions fan and thus Lambeau Field has negative associations for you, so your brain blocks all thoughts of it for the sake of both your physical and emotional health.

Too soon!

Well, at least our quarterback doesn't look like a chronically ill llama about the face. Jus' sayin'.

tessiee January 21, 2012 at 3:58 pm

"slow-motion shots of the blade dropping and his head skittering across the field"

At which point, the fans would have to bounce it over their heads, like a beachball at a concert.

Biel_ze_Bubba January 21, 2012 at 1:14 am

Send them to the dealer (Koch Bros. Corp. Inc. Ltd.) for a retrofit? Better to switch brands entirely.

MittBorg January 21, 2012 at 1:30 am

I was under the opinion that they, you know, squashed them into little car-cubes. A fate that would not be too unpleasant for those of us who have to put up with their various yawpings.

flamingpdog January 21, 2012 at 2:56 am

At Wonkette? Moar like Vulgarians.

Monsieur_Grumpe January 21, 2012 at 8:36 am

Why wasn't there a sequel to that movie?

DrOzarkZ.Hellbender January 21, 2012 at 10:41 am

From what I've read, virtually everybody involved wanted to actually make a sequel, but the tangle of legal rights to the original were one of those Hollywood clusterfucks that made it nigh impossible (and even came close to screwing up the DVD release).

So without ever showing its face, the World Crime League won. Though director JD Richter says "We try to keep the franchise and the brand alive, anyway, because we never know when somebody is going to say, 'Yeah, make something else.'"

No matter where you go, there you are.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 21, 2012 at 10:06 pm

Actually, the script that became Big Trouble in Little China was written as the sequel.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: