Prattler extraordinaire Sarah Palin came the closest yet to endorsing someone as the Republican nominee when she told Fox News’s Sean Hannity on Tuesday that she’d vote for Newt Gingrich in the South Carolina primary. But you see, this is not an endorsement at all, so for confused Republicans still planning on voting Republican this year, we still haven’t found your svengali. Palin said that if she were a voting South Carolinian, she’d choose Newt because basically it would prevent us all from having to enter our probably only months-long arranged marriage with Mitt Romney sooner than is desired (which is NEVARRRR, but the summer would be our second choice after that).
Hannity showed some clips of the roaring patriotism/intoxication of the audience at Monday’s debate, to which Palin responded that all the candidates looked great that night, adding:
All of ‘em seem to be loaded for bear…or moose…or whatever.
Palin then applauded Perry and Santorum, completely ignored Romney, then threw her support around Gingrich, saying he “won” the debate, “if you will.” When pressed by Hannity on whom she’d endorse-or-close-enough, Palin responded:
If I were a South Carolinian…I wanna see this thing continue, because iron sharpens iron, steel sharpens steel. These guys are getting better in their debates, they’re getting more concise, they’re getting more grounded, in what their beliefs are and articulating what their ideas are…in order to keep this thing going, I’d vote for Newt…We know the mistake made in our country four years ago was having a candidate that was not vetted to the degree he should have been so that we know — knew what his associations and his pals represented and what went into his thinking, the shaping of who our president today is.
Kay. Well, Todd Palin already officially endorsed Gingrich, and it’s not a total surprise that Mrs. Palin, lover of spotlights, would choose Gingrich, adulterer of spotlights. But the assumption with the above is also that Palin is afraid that Romney is — HOW DARE SHE — not what he says he is. That she just wants us all to be prepared for and certain of what some weird portion of this country has somehow already decided to lift up into the sky as their chosen lion king. That we don’t know enough about Romney’s “associations and his pals” (easy, he doesn’t have any) and what goes “into his thinking” (a series of 0s and 1s) and what is “shaping” him (each pair of Romney-voting hands, joining together in one abominable sculpture project).
As for Newt, he’s all for it, obviously. The Fox News clip is now on his website, and he tweeted his thanks as well, also including the video in THAT, in case you had any doubts. [Wall Street Journal]
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Can Palin even find SC on a map?
Hell, she can see it from her porch
If someone in that state writes her a check, she could.
such as?
No, because like many US Americans, Palin does not have a map.
It's right between the "A"s in "Alasca"
Trick question!
SC the country, or SC the continent?
She can't figure out why there are two Carolinas.
And for that matter, what happened to East Virginia?
I don't know, but I'll bet she could represent it in a beauty pageant.
Sarah Palin…."Whats a map?"
Cock sharpens cock, twat sharpens twat.
I mean, really. Iron sharpens iron? Steel sharpens steel? Metaphors are supposed to mean something?
I didn't spend all those years playing Dungeons and Dragons and not learn a little something about sharpening a blade. Steel blunts steel, no matter what it says in Proverbs.
Clearly NOT a fellow blade enthusiast…
Where do rock and paper fit into that?
I wonder if she even knows what a whetstone is.
Twits sharpen their Twitters.
Sarah is as sharp as a melted crayon.
Literally!
How much is Gingrinch paying her for her endorsement?
A bauble from Tiffany's, perhaps?
Gingrinch tends to pay all his bimbos with diamonds.
I guess that's better than giving them home appliances.
WHORE DIAMOND LIBEL!1!1!
I want to know how much Obama is paying Palin to endorse Gingrich… or any one of his opponents for that matter?
A Cabinet seat. Dept of Energy.
A year's supply of Slim Jims & a membership to Sam's Club.
The higher the Bump-it, the nearer to God she is.
Bitch needs a new one. She's slipping back in to peak "attractive..for Alaska".
And then, can we stuff the old one in her mouth so she'll STFU?
I used to think the word was "Bum-pit" and actually that fits better.
The years are NOT being kind to her.
The gracious age like fine wine. The nasty age like milk.
Based on the mouth farts that fall out of her cake-hole, I just assumed that was undiagnosed Hydroencephalitis.
Aw! Isn't that cute? She chose Todd's candidate!
Grifters of a feather con together!
"We know the mistake made in our country four years ago was having a candidate that was not vetted to the degree he should have been"
Uh, no, the mistake that made by the Republican Party four years ago was having a VP candidate that was not vetted to the degree she should have been, dooming their ticked.
"…dooming their ticked off presidential candidate" is probably what you meant.
I can't help thinking that Palin never used the verb "to vet" before 2008 and probably though it was a Jewish term to describe what kids do to their bed.
Gah, should have proofread before hitting submit there. Damned typos that are still words!
Typos are people, my fiend.
I thought 'to vet' was where you take your dog.
And I'm still "ticked." Thank you, John McCain.
My guess: she has no fucking ideal what "vetted" means; seriously.
Why would she? Not like she has any experience with it.
No shit!
Maybe she thinks "vetted" means "molested by a middle-age-crisis guy in a fiberglass 2-seat sports car built by Chevy with a bunch of Boone's Farm and blow."
And you don't want to know what "Mustanged" means in Wasilla.
So, Snowbillie's courtship consisted of a good "snow-machinin'" by Toad.
And Baldar knows from 'Vettes, I hear!
To a girl Palin, it means getting banged by a gang of vets. Animal doctors or former soldiers, no matter.
Support are troopz!
“Girl” Palin? As opposed to worn-out piece of ass, quitting and failed politician Palin?
Sarah, honey, it doesn't mean dropped off to get the testicles off. Sorry. Now, please go home.
yet another example of republican opposite world. yesterday (?) i heard somebody somewhere on public radio (thomas frank?) talk about how successful this strategy has been – and how diabolical.
now, in sp's case, i doubt it is 'strategy'. more like 'talking point written on hand'.
I assume this was what passes for subtle in what passes for $arah's mind, and she was referring to Obama; but the unintentional irony is that everyone who hears it will immediately know it refers to her.
Fours years later and Bible Spice still can't seem to grasp the idea that America didn't love her and old Whatshisname enough to elect them to lead this country out of economic disaster.
All of ‘em seem to be loaded for bear…or moose…or whatever.
All of 'em seem to be loaded with bullshit.
Shortered for great accuracy.
~
"All of 'em seem to be loaded."
Better?
Oh shut up, you irrelevant hag.
This is good news for Barack Obama.
Is it just me, or does anyone else find this post extremely difficult to mastaurbate to? Wonkette overlords, please help us, post some pron, that we might fap away this nightmare despite the internet shutdown.
they're not shutting down porn for a day, are they? cuz I don't know what I'd do.
You can always try using your imagination; that sometimes works for me.
You could also try going out and meeting an actual person, and not the kind you roll up next to on the street and offer money.
Sure–tie my hands…
Just buy one item from Victoria's Secret and you'll get free US Mail approved pron forever. But, of course, you have to fight your teenage son for it.
In an emergency, try GAWKER
http://gawker.com/5876950/did-this-person-make-a-…
Used to be, you'd see more than a few Wonketters over at Fleshbot. I miss those days, good times.
While a Michelle Trachtenberg softcore porn would be nice, it would make watching those late Buffy seasons where she was just a kid even more uncomfortable. Oh and that emailer really seems like a creepy stalker.
Just do a load of laundry, that always helps me.
I think "doing loads" is his problem here.
I thought about asking if you were into "Strapping, Newly-Rich NBA Star Seeks Financial Advice In Sultry Accountant's Private Office", but my heart belongs to Limeylizzie.
It's okay, all of our hearts belong to LL
"We want dirty laundry." Now, finally, I know what Henley meant. Still hate the pretentious douche.
Appropriately enough, Dirty Laundry is the name of Heidi Fleiss' laundromat. Not kidding.
She’s like a hooker trolling for a “John’ to sink her grappling hooks into hoping to hitch a ride to the White House.
Palin recently tweeted:
What's radical & intolerant about Santorum/Romney/Gingrich et al's position on the definition of marriage? It's the same position as Obama's
—————————–
I responded, "Unlike you Palin gals who just show a man a positive result on a pee stick and consider that the definition of marriage"
She has yet to respond, lol.
Barb, you are the best. Whatever you use that sharpens wit, please share it with the rest of us.
Thanks! you are very kind.
Barb sharpens Barb, obvs
Awesome!!
"Palin gals who just show a man a positive result on a pee stick and consider that the definition of marriage"
Apparently, it's also their definition of "abstinence".
Sounds like voter fraud to me.
Nah. She's just going to pay O'Keefe to vote for Gingrich for her…and Todd…and her 50,000 children.
"We know the mistake made in our country four years ago was having a candidate that was not vetted to the degree he should have been"
I believe she lifted this quote from Chapter 12 in McCain's upcoming autobiography , titled, "Picking a VP – I'm a Fucking Idiot."
And it's like when Tobias Funke switched all the pronouns in his book to masculine ones.
You know who else is loaded for whatever?
Iran?
Me… after 5?
Bristol?
John Boehner?
Duke Nukem?
Keanu Reeves and Carrie-Anne Moss in "The Matrix"?
Ron Jeremy?
Levi? Wait, no. Levi's Johnson?
Charlie Sheen?
Why not just buy a house in SC for Piper or Trog and let them cast the ballot for you, Snovira?
Sluts are people too my friend.
Thankfully!
"…but enough about how I single-handedly destroyed what little chance McCain had of winning that election" Palin continued.
"…but did upgrade my wardrobe in the process"
"I wanna see this thing continue, because iron sharpens iron, steel sharpens steel."
And paper covers rock, rock breaks scissors, and scissors cut paper. What to do, what to do???
The cow is misquoting Proverb 27:17 there.
"As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another."
The Bumpit Strumpet lives by Proverbs 26:11: "As a dog returneth to his vomit, so a fool returneth to his folly."
Newt Gingrich is concise? hahahahahahahaha
Clearly. Sarah knows from concise, NTD.
Palin's like a friggin' case of herpes. She just will not go away.
Tapers off after a few years. Her progress is actually typical, as time passes, her outbreaks will become rarer and less severe.
Roger Ailes is just trying to get his money's worth out of her, before he drops her back off at her street corner.
All of them were loaded, Katie.
These guys are getting better in their debates,
After, what? 675 consecutive debates? Talk about damning with faint praise. About as good as "almost" hitting the toilet.
The only way the debates are going to get better is if they start using live ammo.
I'd pay to see that debate.
Wait! She wants "this thing" to continue, yet she's already saying she would vote for Gingrich. Doesn't that imply that she's made her choice and so should America? Or maybe I'm just throwing a logic blanket on her otherwise stellar bullshit bonfire.
Palin knows nothing of this logic of which you speak.
Your happy time joy cycle on the washing machine must have you addled. She was oh so carefully having her cake and eating it, too. She never said she wanted Gingrich to be the nominee, she just said she wanted to see the primary continue to be a contest, and would therefore vote for Gingrich presumably just to sharpen up Romney. Sneaky cunt, is what she is.
"Palin responded that all the candidates looked great that night, adding: All of ‘em seem to be loaded for bear…or moose…or whatever."
That's what they're calling them now?
Anybody else think that watching the Tundra Grifter hit her 50s and beyond is going to be worth having to listen to her screech occasionally? I think she is going to stick with the brown hair, bumpits, and drag-queen-quantities of makeup until she's even more senile, and it's going to be quite hilarious.
Add some more cheek contour, honey!
Absolutely. Paparazzi will earn their place in our economy, and I will subscribe to celebrity magazines if they provide good shots of cellulite, bingo wings, grey roots, jowls, and skin-crocodiling on Sarah.
(Funny. Being petty, catty and superficial didn't feel all that bad just now.)
"bingo wings"
I was picturing the white streaks that Paulie Walnuts has, then I realized that you were referring to "Hadassah arms".
I don't get the Newt endorsement. Seems like she'd be more aligned with Santorum, who's also pro-populate-for-whitey, approx. same # of kids in the brood, ready to frack the earth for all its worth in fossil fuels, and maintaining a relatively fit & trim physique, letting all that lard-spume-for-thought go to their brain rather than the belly.
"… they’re getting more grounded, in what their beliefs are and articulating what their ideas are … "
Beliefs: Gays are evil and destroying our nation, corporations can do whatever the fuck they want, and black kids should be cleaning toilets and picking our food.
Ideas: Cut taxes on rich folks, prevent anyone but the rich from affording health care, and make the poor even poorer.
There — I was even more concise in articulating the GOP's beliefs and ideas.
I can haz endorsement now?
You forgot the whole "war on everyone brown, preferably with oil" thing.
Noes U can haz no endorsement. U haz no Superpac monies 2 play teh game.
"…Palin is afraid that Romney is — HOW DARE SHE — not what he says he is."
Don't worry, that'll change…
Speaking of Palin, for those of you going to the CPAC Horrorfest at the Marriott Wardman Park Hotel in D.C. in February, this interesting item appears on the Official CPAC Convention Schedule:
Saturday night, 11:50 p.m.: Naked Party, Palin Suite: Join the voluptuous and gorgeous sexy politico babe Sarah "Hot Stuff" Palin as she hosts a Naked Party in her expansive 13th-floor suite, known coyly as "The 'Hospitality' Sweet Suite!" There is no cost, there will be a free open cash bar, free appetizers, and the only requirement for entry is that you have to strip off all of your clothes and attend naked. Also appearing: Ann Coulter, Michelle Malkin, Christy O'Donnell, Michelle Bachmann.
Fuck. My penis just retreated into my body.
Ew; talk about boner-killing (aside from Malkin, and maybe O'Donnell).
You like your women with more bush in their cush, eh?
True that part is a turn-off.
More cushin' for the pushin'!
Free entertainment? Or is that cash, too?
free open cash bar??
Does not compute.
Eeesh. With that many vagina dentatas on full display, it'll be like watching a school of anorexic piranhas.
"you have to strip off all of your clothes and attend naked. Also appearing: Ann Coulter"
Duct tape doesn't count as clothes?
Worst. Pron. Evar.
Why do I suspect that Chris Christie will be first in line?
Oh, right, "free appetizers".
Or "All of 'em, Sean."
What a dumb cunt. Over 3 years since the Couric interview and she still can't answer a simple fucking question.
She still thinks that people find that snowbilly talk, cute and folksy.
Mitt Romney sends his thanks.
And how the fuck exactly did we not "knew what his associations and his pals represented and what went into his thinking"? Remember all the nonsense during the election about Rev. White? Or how about Bill Ayers, just a guy Obama somewhat knew? Or Tony Rezko, just a monetary donator? The mainstream media went on and on about these fake controversies, trying to smear Obama with guilt by association. Fuck, there was more digging into his background than any other presidential candidate in history. How the fuck was he not vetted?
He won.
I think the bizarre claim that Obama wasn't vetted, along with the bullshit claims of voter fraud, go to the wingnuts' inability to accept that the majority of Americans actually are non-racist enough to vote for a black guy for President.
Because no one came out and used the N-word. There are probably dozens of blind voters that accidentally voted for him, not knowing the horrible truth.
"How the fuck was he not vetted?"
One simple word, the same simple word that explains everything they say about him, no matter how unsubstantiated or off-the-wall:
Blah.
America didn't realize he was black.
If she is the maverick rogue moose-fucker she claims to be, she shoulda fake voted for Ron Paul or even Santorum. Newt is a giant slab of GOP establishment. I guess that whole tea party thang is so passé.
In fact, the Tea Baggers have been strangely quiet for a few months. Wonder what they are up to?
"— knew what his associations and his pals represented and what went into his thinking, the shaping of who our president today is."
Only someone who's so ignorant of American history that she thinks it's represented by Paul Revere wearing a tri-cornered hat, waving an American flag (with 50 stars) and riding around New Hampshire (or was it New Amsterdam?) yelling at people that the British were here to take away our 2nd Amendment rights could see "what went into his thinking, the shaping of who our president today is" [sic] as some sort of mystery.
The cunt.
Dozy cunt.
This is some grade B performance art, even by Roger Ailes standards. Not content with having his payrolled minions put Mitt down and try to inoculate Fox from his failure to win the White House this fall, he sends Palin out to hammer the message home with a sledge.
I've noticed that Grifter looking harsh lately. When Greta Van Susteren or Brian Kilmeade starts looking better than Palin, Ailes is going to pull the trap door on her.
"All of ‘em seem to be loaded for bear…or moose…or whatever."
How exactly does one become 'loaded for bear'? I'm envisioning a day of full front to back waxing and anal bleaching but I could be wrong.
Oh no way would I go through all of that. It's enough for me to keep the front room "ready for company", if you know what I mean. Hey, we can't keep the Christmas lights up year 'round.
anal bleaching????
.
.
[quickly Googles] Huh. Câlisse. That's a real thing.
.
.
I guess I am as out of touch as my son says I am.
Thanks for not including audio. l can still fap to her picture, imagining giving her a good hate-fucking; bending her over her dining room table, wiping my dick off on the drapes and breaking a lamp on the way out, but that voice….that voice…..instant soft-on.
When you're finished she'll be endorsing Santorum- amiright?
Leaking Santorum, fer sure.
Could someone introduce her to the active voice, please? Jesus, its exhausting wading through her sentences, trying to figure out who or what is the moving force, who is doing all this choosing and vetting, she so clings to the passive voice and the unspoken subject, like a fucking lying child. "What happened to the vase?" "It got broken." Mistakes were made. The dog was fucked. What was the mistake that was made here in Wasilla about the drug-taking thing is that coke was snorted over there on that barrel thing what with the snowmachine racing.
All of ‘em seem to be loaded for bear…or moose…or whatever.
Or small varmints, as it were.
Like newts?
iron sharpens iron and still sharpens still?
Rock beats paper, paper beats rock..
Takes a grifter to know a grifter? Do like your new glasses.
██████!
Wait, what's the dildo?
That ████.
Pedobear wept.
She's more r████d than t██g.
Sweet
"iron sharpens iron, steel sharpens steel"
No, a goddamn rock sharpens steel. And all the GOP candidates are as dumb as one.
if sarah palin looked like that back in 2007, bill kristol wouldn't have gotten off that cruise ship.
anagram- bill krystol, kill bristol
So Sarah, when's Willow due? And most importantly, is T███ the father?
Rumor has it she's engaged. So I guess she's about 5 months along.
T____ = Tebow?
Or T____ > Tebow?
TN>=Tebow ∀ N
Sara doesn't know about Romney’s “associations and his pals”? Given her constant comments about Obama's "pal" Ayers, she doesn't really know what a pal is.
Is Grifter Sarah plugging another bus tour?
████ ████ ████!!!!!!!! ████ H ████,
PG, I too am an olde, could you sp██k a ██tt█ lo███r pl██s█?
Palin said if she was a voting South Carolianian..
If my aunt had a dick, she'd be my uncle..
She needs to go back to the flag themed bikini with assault rifle accessory cuz that "cougar on the prowl" look is so not working.
I guess she should feel special insofar as she has her own "background shot" at Fox; seems most everyone else just has a cityscape placed behind them, but she gets the mountain/forest/lake scene. They should have some oil derricks, 4x4s with monster mudder tires and snow machines tearing up the scenery, and hunters armed with machine-guns slaughtering some wolves and mooses photoshopped in there too.
I've always wondered: if the plural of "goose" is "geese," why isn't "moose" "meese?"
I almost put that, but then I remembered the Hanna-Barbera of my youth, Pixie and Dixie, and Mr. Jinks saying "I hates meeses to pieces." So, obviously, meese is the plural for mouse, not moose.
It used to be. But after Reagan's buddy Ed Meese was finished his epic stint as Attorney General (agents told to let North have enough time to shred documents before removing him from his office, chartering a laughing-stock pornography report, saying "you can't be a suspect and be not guilty. That's contradictory.",….) the moose got together and asked that their name be changed.
I really hope that all of these hateful, vengeful screws move out of the country when Barry wins again.
Doesn't Bristol live under her moms AK "studio" now? Do you think she was conscious enough to hear her mom say "We know the mistake made in our country four years ago was having a candidate that was not vetted to the degree he should have been"? possibly the most cogent yet idiotic thing SP has ever said.
I've made a lot of mistakes, but voting to put this dingbat one missed beat of John McCain's ticker away from the nuclear launch codes was not one of them.
We know the mistake made in our country four years ago was having a candidate that was not vetted to the degree he should have been…
Her lack of self-awareness is fucking staggering.
That, or her capacity for projection.
We know the mistake made in our country four years ago was having a veep candidate that was not vetted to the degree she should have been so that we know — knew what her associations and her pals represented and what went into her thinking, the shaping of who our veep could have been but thankfully today is not.
Fixed.
John McCain – why oh why did you have to unleash this ignorant harpy upon us? Will we never be rid of her?
'Smatter with her? All that luxurious time on her hands, she should be out there spending her time fucking young buck basketball players, end of story, full stop. By taking time out to talk to Hannity, she has jeopardized her chances of taking advantage of some really great opportunities, who are likely to go way higher in the draft than she can afford to pursue.
I understand Herman Cain has a lot of evenings free lately.
If, if she were politically savvy by the most modest of measures, I would think the bitch wouldn't have brought up the vetted comment. I mean, really, she just keeps getting dimmer.
Howdy interviews Doody and this is the result.
When InSannity conducts an infomercial with a fellow FOXPAC employee, would it be too much to ask the network to make that clear?
As for Duh Gov'Nuh voting in South Carolina, Ann Falter votes anywhere she wants. Why doesn't Lou Sarah?
Over at Media Matters, the video clip of Duh Gov'Nuh has a crawl about the Italian ship captain quitting half way through the cruise.
Somebody at FOXPAC doesn't like Lou Sarah very much…
Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, of ye of little self-awareness, popping off on a candidate not being properly vetted in 2008…
"what his associations and his pals represented ":
She's still doing the Bill Ayres riff after so many years? Amazing.
"We know the mistake made in our country four years ago was having a candidate that was not vetted to the degree he should have been …"
Sarah Palin is the Empress of Unintended Irony.
Translation:
PAY ATTENTION TO ME! PAY ATTENTION TO MEE!! PAY ATTENTION TO ME-ME-MEEE!!!
Jesus Christ is she stupid. What a dismal bitch.
I know this may be inappropriate, but I like Sara Palin's ass, and her gorgeous lips and those massive just begging for squezzin breasts. Call me what you will, I have actually had original thoughts ( most in the quantum arena ), but I like her shape. She makes me feel alive. I could get over having a 45-70 on the headboard, just as long as I could bang her head on it too. I attended Baker High School in Columbus, Georgia. I am sure Newt sees the same grab points I do. Vette this Sara, I stole Mr. Strealdorfs paddle, and returned it to Oscar Boyle in his office in exchange for a reduced suspension. I do love her tits.
Mitt, the road to Palin's endorsement runs right through her wallet.
Please avoid upfisting when you are offline. Miss Manners and the locals cops will both tell you the same thing.
But what about if you're with someone who likes being upfisted?
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