REBEL YELL  1:25 am January 17, 2012

South Carolina Republicans Boo Black Person For Mentioning Blacks

by Wonkette Jr.

It was a great Republican debate in South Carolina, we bet! But there was a rerun of an infomercial we decided to watch instead, while eating rat poison and singing disco songs about urinating on the dead enemy in Europe or something. Here’s the debate host guy, broadcaster Juan Williams, rudely interrupting Newt Gingrich’s standing ovation by asking the Newt if maybe it was uncool to say black people and poor people just lack a certain something, because they are black and poor. By the end of this GOP campaign, we’re pretty sure these clowns will be openly arguing the merits of enslaving Africans to “get our economy back on track.” 2011 is a lot like 1911, 1811, 1711 and probably 1611!

The other thing that happened, at this debate, was that Rick Perry got some huge applause for defending the Marines desecrating the corpses of whatever people the Marines were killing that day. It’s inspirational, as always:

Was that a joke about The Gong Show, a weird counterculture stoner television series from the 1970s? Is Perry drunk again, but this time on Mexican marijuana?

Let’s get the consensus view:

Republican presidential front-runner Mitt Romney appeared rattled on Tuesday night after being challenged by his rivals in a televised debate over his failure to disclose tax returns and the millions of dollars spent by his supporters on negative ads.

The debate, at times raucous, came only days before the potentially decisive South Carolina primary, possibly the last state in which Romney’s main opponents can feasibly stop his run for the Republican nomination.

Although Romney enjoys an 8% poll lead over his nearest rival, Newt Gingrich, his uncomfortable performance watched by millions of viewers, many of them from South Carolina, may have cost him votes.

So, Mitt Romney is still in the race. Good for him! And if it’s an “uncomfortable performance” by Mitt Romney, you can be very certain that Mitt Romney showed up and took part in the debate. As for the other candidates remaining in this five-man race to the bottom, Rick Santorum was probably pretty quiet due to a mouth full of semen, and Ron Paul probably won the debate by handing out copies of his famous Southern newsletters. [The Guardian/New York Times/USA Today]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 239 comments }

DrunkIrishman January 17, 2012 at 1:28 am

Juan Williams has it double bad – he's black and his first name is Spanish.

nounverb911 January 17, 2012 at 1:44 am

I thought his first name was Juan?
(Sorry, it's past my bedtime.)

DrunkIrishman January 17, 2012 at 1:46 am

Hardy har har!

barto January 17, 2012 at 2:02 am

Juan is Spanish for Juan, or is it Spanish is Juan for Spanish, I forget. Anyway, pretty much interchangeable.

DrunkIrishman January 17, 2012 at 2:17 am

Why is Juan so happy?

I think he finally figured himself out.

Huh, I guess it takes Juan to know Juan.

carlgt1 January 17, 2012 at 7:32 pm

did you hear the people giggling in the audience when Newt called him Juan? Does just hearing a Messican name cause mirth? Too bad Juan wasn't gay and asked about gay black issues too….

arihaya January 17, 2012 at 7:32 am

and his middle name is "Jamal" ?

that would be triple bad for Hispanic-Muslin-African American like him

horsedreamer_1 January 17, 2012 at 10:32 pm

Does he wear traditional Muslin garb? 'Cause I am nervous enough, as it is.

hagajim January 17, 2012 at 11:18 am

Don't forget the third bad…he works for Faux.

smokefillednewyear January 17, 2012 at 4:17 pm

Yeah–wtf is Juan with him?

nounverb911 January 17, 2012 at 1:29 am

What do you expect from a bunch of inbred, grits for brains, morons?

smokefillednewyear January 17, 2012 at 1:54 am

stinky linky
Here you go.

Serolf_Divad January 17, 2012 at 5:47 am

Sadly, as a person whno ha spent agreat deal of time there and who has family in South Carolina, this is what I've come to expect from the South Carolina GOP debate. It's a contest to see who can take the most extreme, reactionary positions. This was, after all, the same place where four years ago the candidates were falling all over themselves to defend waterboarding and "harsh interrogation techniques" (AKA torture) of terrorism suspects. And the news media, for some odd reason, failed to see the significance of the fact that the candidates were selling the torture of brown skinned people to an adoring audience in a place where a few decades earlier black men were subject to extra-judicial torture and murder for failing to pay proper respect to white people.

Nor is there a hint of self-awareness in this crowd, a glimmer of understanding that when Gingrich claims that Barack Obama has put more people on food stamps than any other president in history, he's blaming the president for the fallout from an economic catasrophe that is the product of decades of GOP led repeals of banking regulations that were put in place after the previous great economic catastrophe that was the Great Depression, and that were exacerbated by 8 years of disatrous GOP leadership more concerned with fueling a dangerous rise in housing prices that represented about the only engine of economic growth at the time, than imposing policies that would have slowly let the air out of the bubble (stricter lending standards, sharper, faster rate hikes by a Federal Reserve that was in the hands of an Objectivist disciple of Ayn Rand.)

As bullshit as it is, Gingrich's claims fit the nonsense narrative that Republicans (and especially white, Southern Republicans) want to believe: that the policies favored by Democrats and black leaders discourage work and make African Americans dependent on government aid programs.

I'd like to be snarky, but the best I can come up with after listening to Gingrich is: FUCK THESE ASSCLOWNS!

swordfis January 17, 2012 at 8:40 am

Thank you for this.

BelleSC January 17, 2012 at 9:15 am

I thank you as well.

Toomush_Infer January 17, 2012 at 10:17 am

Well, the Souf will rise agin (minus a few teef)…

hunnybee January 17, 2012 at 2:07 pm

lovely, and thank you.

cheetojeebus January 17, 2012 at 6:43 am

MMMmmm grits.

Steverino247 January 17, 2012 at 1:30 am

OK, here's the next (Not)Colbert SuperPAC ad:

Show Mitt Romulan pissing on the logos of the corporations he killed. "Corporations are having a bad day, buddy!"

flamingpdog January 17, 2012 at 2:08 am

The next SuperPAC ad is already out and here. The ad asks people to vote for Herman Cain.

Steverino247 January 17, 2012 at 3:13 am

I wonder how long it took him to get that creepy grin down pat…

Radiotherapy January 17, 2012 at 2:44 am

Mictturation.

fartknocker January 17, 2012 at 2:51 am

God damn, I love this guy. How much does any Wonkette want to bet that every shrimp and grits chef and pantaloume seamstress in Charleston with an "R" on their voter registration card is pissing nails over this amusing ad?

Wonkette, drop the DOE hazmat suits in the corners and on top. It's slowing the servers you whisky drinking socialites.

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 2:57 am

The only reason I'd believe they were pissing nails is if I believed they were self-aware enough to get the joke.

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 1:31 am

In other news, scientist confirm that watter is, indeed, still wet.

It's a great, fucking day in South Carolina! Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah!

Steverino247 January 17, 2012 at 1:34 am

With a SuperPac on my shoulder…

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 1:36 am

Why, hell, I think this is their official state motto:

South Carolina: Booing The Blahs Since 1788

Katydid January 17, 2012 at 7:54 am

The people at the debate act like a bunch of traIned penguins.

dijetlo January 17, 2012 at 10:54 am

I thought it was " South Carolina: Too small to be a country, to big to be an insane asylum."-

Reuben Wesley Ballard – True fact beyotches!!!

carolinaswamp January 17, 2012 at 11:37 am

Actually that is "Too small for a Republic, too large for an insane aslyum", first uttered by James L. Petigru, one of the few politicians in SC in 1860 who didn't deserve to be in an insane asylum. Some of us have since come to believe that Mr. Petigru was wrong. Evidence shows, year after year, that South Carolina is not too large for an insane asylum. Also, what on earth makes anyone think that SC wasn't Booing The Blahs before 1788. I'm pretty sure that started in 1670.

MosesInvests January 17, 2012 at 3:18 pm

South Carolina: First in Treason.

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 11:27 pm

…and last in reason.

OkieDokieDog January 17, 2012 at 1:40 am

So was Juan the only blah guy in the room?

nounverb911 January 17, 2012 at 1:42 am

Only if you don't count the school kids mopping up after the debate.

iburl January 17, 2012 at 1:50 am

Please, nobody mention Santorum.

Carrabuda January 17, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Yep, just the Juan.

DrunkIrishman January 17, 2012 at 1:45 am

Rick Perry secretly wishes those soldiers were pissing on him.

flamingpdog January 17, 2012 at 2:11 am

GOLDEN SHOWER LIBEL!!!

Serolf_Divad January 17, 2012 at 7:04 am

I nominate this for COTD.

anniegetyerfun January 17, 2012 at 10:16 am

"Well, shucks, you see, it ain't that bad, havin' a bunch o' fellers take a nice, warm piss on your prone body. Kinda relaxin'. Well, not TOO relaxin', if you get my drift."

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 12:57 pm

What, was craigslist having an off day?

coolhandnuke January 17, 2012 at 1:45 am

At the next GOP Debate, after introducing the clowns, the moderator will bring out a wheel chair-bound, gay, black, homeless, soldier with no health care whose mentally ill brother was executed in a Texas prison–then tell the audience "due to network obligations we are on a strict schedule but we are allowing you five minutes of un-interrupted booing, begin."

emmelemm January 17, 2012 at 3:16 am

Efficiency!

rte148 January 17, 2012 at 3:18 am

you owe me a new keyboard cause I snorted milk all over reading your comment.

Guppy January 17, 2012 at 7:11 am

Feh, they'd just unabashedly call it the "Five Minute Hate."

Monsieur_Grumpe January 17, 2012 at 8:39 am

And then they will hang him for being a little uppity.

yrbmegr January 17, 2012 at 9:08 am

But not before Rick perry pees on him.

Steverino247 January 17, 2012 at 1:45 am

Well, it's no surprise that the evangelicals have rallied behind Santorum (hee hee, "rallied behind Santorum") against the LSD candidate. They know that if we elect a Mormon to be President, we'll never be rid of them. The fact that their beliefs are only slightly less insane does not occur to them. Or, if it did, they fear that when a truly crazy religion gets close to putting a member in the White House, that their game would be up, too. At some point, Americans are going to have to start questioning religions or just ignore them altogether.

Isyaignert January 17, 2012 at 3:05 am

LSD candidate – luv it!

Steverino247 January 17, 2012 at 3:11 am

Yes, that was NOT a typo.

GOPCrusher January 17, 2012 at 12:34 pm

The real problem is that Mormons do not send their munnies to the same cult that Evangelicals do. Therefore, they are not right with God.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:01 pm

"They know that if we elect a Mormon to be President, we'll never be rid of them. The fact that their beliefs are only slightly less insane does not occur to them."

Yeah, but they're the wrong kind of insane beliefs in the wrong myth, therefore they're eeeeeeevil!!

iburl January 17, 2012 at 1:48 am

Newt's "Contract on Black America", promising to make black children work menial jobs is a national revolutionary work of genius that only somebody of Newt's white-haired, ancient, fat, brilliance could have devised.

…or any given white person in South Carolina before the Civil War.

flamingpdog January 17, 2012 at 2:12 am

or after the Civil War.

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 2:50 am

Sounds more like a Contract Killing on Black America, to me.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:04 pm

It is, but pointing that out is class war, or reverse racism, or some other made-up bullshit, so it's a faux pas to mention it.

Now let's all forget our troubles with a big bowl of strawberry ice cream!

Ruhe January 17, 2012 at 8:59 am

Another interesting angle that should be brought to the Newt's attention is that his claims that 30 children could be employed for the cost of employing one adult janitor is a disingenuous red herring. What Newt is talking about is a government run employment program that would of necessity require an expensive and cumbersome bureaucracy to oversee the use of that child labor. Every school would need monitors on staff to be sure that the child labor was being used appropriately and you'd still need your entire janitorial staff to stay on hand as back-up if not for other reasons. The "jobs" Newt is proposing are just pretend jobs and the real intent of the whole proposal is just to fluff a certain segment of the electorate.

yrbmegr January 17, 2012 at 9:09 am

While he cuts school budgets. How's that work again?

GOPCrusher January 17, 2012 at 12:36 pm

Well, to be fair, Newt is a historian that believes the South won the Civil War.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:02 pm

"somebody of Newt's white-haired, ancient, fat, cancer-wife divorcing, serial adulterer brilliance"

ftfy

OkieDokieDog January 17, 2012 at 1:51 am

I can't decide which one of those videos has the biggest asshole fuckwad jabbering nonsense to a crowd of ignorant and hateful assholes.

and lol at Rick Frothy Santorum's mouth full of semen.

iburl January 17, 2012 at 1:53 am

This GOP race has indeed stretched the limits of our ability as a species to perceive the ever-plummeting depths of hateful stupidity and vulgar xenophobia.

Isyaignert January 17, 2012 at 3:11 am

I am embarassed as hell for those trogolidytes on stage and in the audience. They're all so fukkin' stupid but they think they're fukkin' geniuses. Their hatred of everyone who isn't a hater is so fukkin' hateful that it makes me hate and I'm a fukkin' lover, damnit!

smokefillednewyear January 17, 2012 at 1:52 am

"First of all Juan, the fact is that whatever I say will be regarded as truth by these imbeciles. Barack Obama is a member of the Illuminati. FEMA death camps! Population control! New World Order!!"
*cheers*

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 2:43 am

You forgot 9/11. That still has so much currency that it's ridiculous.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:05 pm

What, are they now saying Barry is a *time-traveling* muslin socialist who was behind 9/11?

prommie January 17, 2012 at 10:58 am

Anti-Colonialist!

fuflans January 17, 2012 at 2:07 am

i don't know. if i were juan maybe i would have stayed with npr and not tried to dance with fox.

but then i'm conservative that way.

flamingpdog January 17, 2012 at 2:14 am

I don't think dancing with Fox was his problem. Challenging a fat, racist white man in South Carolina was his problem.

GOPCrusher January 17, 2012 at 12:39 pm

I would hope that the audience booing him, and then cheering Rick Perry for his stance on pissing on dead people, made Juan Williams just a little uncomfortable. Especially in South Carolina.

emmelemm January 17, 2012 at 3:17 am

NPR don't pay the dineros that FOX does.

Serolf_Divad January 17, 2012 at 7:12 am

True dat. Wingnut welfare beats PBS food stamps any day of the week. Just ask perennial right-wing "think tank" dweller and eminent auteur of Dow 36,000, James Glassman. Despite writing the laughingest joke of a book extolling the virtues of the late 1990's tech bubble (which he failed to recognize as a bubble) Glassman has had no difficulty finding billionaire patrons who will continue to fund his idiotic right-wing bloviating.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:08 pm

"no difficulty finding billionaire patrons who will continue to fund his idiotic right-wing bloviating"

There's something really wrong with a country where so many people are out of work, working for what they made 20 years ago, or half of what they made 20 years ago, working two or three jobs and still unable to pay the bills — and yet, any half-wit who makes unsubstantiated statements and/or veiled racist "jokes" about the President has the Cato Institute or who the fuck ever show up at their house with a dump truck full of money.

SudsMcKenzie January 17, 2012 at 4:18 am

This would never of happened on "Car Talk".

Guppy January 17, 2012 at 7:13 am

I hope there weren't any Muslims on the flight down. Wouldn't want him feeling uncomfortable.

Nostrildamus January 17, 2012 at 2:13 am

I'd like to thank the people of S. Carolina for providing the perfect venue to showcase the talents of this extraordinary, Republican field.

yrbmegr January 17, 2012 at 9:10 am

I think the 5 Mitt Romneys beat the 4 Not Mitt Romneys. At least the Mitts outnumbered the Not Mitts.

fuflans January 17, 2012 at 2:13 am

USA!! USa!? usa???

france?

Monsieur_Grumpe January 17, 2012 at 8:41 am

Oui!

prommie January 17, 2012 at 10:58 am

Viva La France!

Nostrildamus January 17, 2012 at 2:16 am

"South Carolina Republicans Boo Black Person"

also, "Red Sox Nation Booes Yankees"

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 2:52 am

Also, the "Philadelphia Eagles Boo Santa Claus and Anything on the Field (again)"

DemmeFatale January 17, 2012 at 10:56 am

Now that Philly has Schmappy, (etymology: Papelbon= Schmapelbon=Schmapps, it's kinda Yiddishy), you can have the wonderful experience of seeing ol' "sphincter mouth" closing a game!

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:10 pm

In related news, fire suspected to be hot.

cherry_hemp January 17, 2012 at 2:34 am

Ron Paul tried to explain the difference between military spending and defense spending. He tried to educate them about the difference between Taliban and Al Queda. But the morons booed him the most when he tried to teach them the Golden Rule. All right, it's my turn to say it: I don't want to live in this country any more.

Isyaignert January 17, 2012 at 3:15 am

I just saw a TeeVee special on Italy and damn, it made me want to move there. I know it's fukked up, but at least they have healthcare, the food is delicious, the wine flows, the climate and scenery are the best in the world and the people are gorgeous and they're the world's best lovers.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:11 pm

"the people are gorgeous and they're the world's best lovers"

*cues music, "Stayin' Alive"*
*struts*

natoslug January 17, 2012 at 1:17 pm

Whereas my daughter, who has lived in Italy for 19 of her 20 years, wants nothing more than to move to the U.S. because she believes it to be the land of opportunity, Italian men are ugly, drunk and boring, there's too much religious influence, wages are too low and most of the government is corrupt. I keep trying to convince her that it's the same here and I should move there rather than her move here.

Callyson January 17, 2012 at 2:35 am

One of the most significant moments came when Romney, pushed by Texas governor Rick Perry, tentatively agreed to release his tax returns. He has repeatedly resisted this but caved in after questioning by Perry…
Romney said that the tradition was that candidates released such details in April and he would "probably" do the same, adding he had nothing to hide.
Riiight…which explains why you won't release returns from previous years, which have already been prepared…

Data Exactly January 17, 2012 at 3:11 am

Well, now we'll know that nothing illegal is in them, right? I'm sure whatever Mitt Romney didn't want seen was minor. Probably tearing up terrain in a mopehead in a restricted National Park, going on vacation with a whole kennel's worth of dogs on his roof, or maybe a 'firing people spree' – ooohh, he REALLY loves those!

Guppy January 17, 2012 at 7:16 am

Swiss banks exist for a reason!

Biff January 17, 2012 at 12:04 pm

I'm thinking he's more concerned about the church realizing he's been fudging on his tithes than the gummint realizing he's been cheating on income taxes.

Isyaignert January 17, 2012 at 1:48 pm

He doesn't want us to know just how low a tax rate he and his ilk pay, 'cos it'd piss us off royally if we knew how the rich have skreeeeewed us ever since their patron saint, St. Ronnie Raygun came to town.

BTW – Occupy the Courts this Friday to acknowledge the awful Citizens United SCOTUS ruling. Go to http://www.movetoamend.org to find out what your town's doing and show up – stuff like this scares the hell out of the 1% – good times!!

Callyson January 17, 2012 at 2:38 am

In the parking lot outside the Myrtle Beach Convention Center, anti-Romney fliers were left on car windshields. "If you've been laid off, you've already met Mitt Romney," one read.
OK, and now Obama has the doorknocker flyers for election day almost ready–all his campaign needs to do now is to personalize them with the location of the voting booths.
Occupy the voting booth!

swordfis January 17, 2012 at 8:42 am

Indeed

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 2:41 am

BTW, I see the MSM doesn't want its new narrative (the Unstoppable, Inevitable Romney) ruined, because the two most recent polls show Gingrich within a few points of Romney in South Carolina. Only one shows Romney up significantly. And, I'd be more inclined to believe that Gingrich's performance, last night, helped him as opposed to hurting him. Whenever they get to score points off the moderator, they win.

Data Exactly January 17, 2012 at 3:15 am

Well, that's good, because there's still one more debate before the South Carolina Primary.

memzilla January 17, 2012 at 2:51 am

"White, Racist, ignorant, hateful, bigoted, biased, knuckle-dragging revisionist wishers for a return to The Golden Age of Slavery and Torture: Here Are Your Candidates!"

The real message I got were the Faux News and WSJ logos in the background.

Rupert Murdoch certainly knows how to throw red meat to the proles. The GOP is expert in using red-meat social issues to divert the proles' attention from the true agenda of the 1%.

400 families now control more wealth than 150 million Americans do. Now that's Mission Accomplished!

prommie January 17, 2012 at 10:59 am

Lumpenproles. Proles would be democrats.

memzilla January 17, 2012 at 12:31 pm

Thanks for the correction. You get high Marx for figuring out the Engels.

fartknocker January 17, 2012 at 2:58 am

As the Wonkette peoples representative from Austin can America keep this gapping asshat for another week? Please. We damn sure don’t want him back as our governor, although given his current performance, he’s toast.

cheaphits January 17, 2012 at 10:16 am

That's interesting.

So with the lone exception of Ron Paul who will probably hold his seat as long as he draws breath, but will never get the nod this year, none of these asshats could get re-elected in their home areas.

Ricky Buttjuice lost PA already and still has no chance there, Willard didn't run for a second terms as governor because he knew he get his ass kicked and couldn't get elected there today and Neuter had so fowled his nest that he had to give up his seat and the speakership

The GOP (Grand Old PeterPrinciple?) Debate motto should be –

"Losers for President"

ThundercatHo January 17, 2012 at 10:25 am

I think you may get your wish since he has "let out his inner cowboy" according to TDB.

coolhandnuke January 17, 2012 at 3:11 am

The Perry video ends with him saying "and I saw the result of it in the sands of Iran 1979…never again!"
Most of Perrys' words are gobbledegook and confusing, but this soundbite confused me. First, Perry left the Air Force in 1977 so he could not have seen (firsthand) anything Iran1979 from a C-130 cockpit.
But the "sands of Iran" bit…was he referring to Carter's military mission to liberate the Iran Hostages. No, they crashed in the sands of North Africa. He's prolly just mixing up The Sands of Iwo Jima/his John Wayne fetish with the other jumbled thought in his brain.
So it must be Perry the almighty ruler of the world huffing and puffing out a threat to Iran and any country that wants to stage a revolution, be sovereign, and that will not happen on his watch

Ruhe January 17, 2012 at 9:15 am

Oh, he was there all right, flying in low to get a good view of our national disgrace in those burning sands and he clearly remembers what he saw…and the sound of his plane's engine, the cylinders pounding…ta-pocketa, pocketa, pocketa, pocketa…the ice on the windows growing thicker….

Chichikovovich January 17, 2012 at 9:24 am

I love the sound of Walter Mitty in the morning.

ShaveTheWhales January 17, 2012 at 5:36 pm

I tend to overuse "pocketa pocketa". Also, almost nobody gets the reference anymore.

Radiotherapy January 17, 2012 at 3:14 am

Hey Newt, you what else Obama is? He's the C in C of the largest military machine in the history of the world. He's the Chief Executive of the biggest economy in humankind. He hasn't raised taxes on anybody a penny. He won a Nobel Peace Prize.
And within the last week Russ said you "sound like Elizabeth Warren."
Fuck off you race baiting, thoroughly discredited phony.

yrbmegr January 17, 2012 at 9:13 am

Actually, Obama has cut taxes for most taxpayers, and has even cut spending from the go-go Bush years.

Toomush_Infer January 17, 2012 at 10:29 am

Ummm, truthiness….?

Data Exactly January 17, 2012 at 3:17 am

Juan Williams is Puerto Rican, though, not black?!? This is the sort of stuff that happens when you miss debates, Wonkette….

dewan_gibson January 17, 2012 at 3:39 am

Juan Williams is a black Panamanian. In short, he has the same background has most black Americans, just got off the boat earlier.

Chet Kincaid January 17, 2012 at 9:59 am

He is not Puerto Rican.

Huevos Ocupados January 17, 2012 at 3:53 am

Put simply, these guys are a bunch of dicks.

prommie January 17, 2012 at 11:00 am

Racist dicks.

hagajim January 17, 2012 at 11:24 am

Salted racist dicks

SudsMcKenzie January 17, 2012 at 4:16 am

Republican candidates infesting South Carolina?, … thats like sending Jerry Sandusky into a shower room, nothing good will come from it.

I'm sure "Juan's" colleagues on FOX will come to his defense.

mavenmaven January 17, 2012 at 5:04 am

He's just getting the crowd warmed up this time. At the next debate, he's going to lead an actual lynching.

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 7:46 am

Of who? Himself?!

GOPCrusher January 17, 2012 at 12:47 pm

Juan will take one for the team.

mavenmaven January 17, 2012 at 4:34 pm

Note to self: Avoid pronouns in snarky comments. I wrote that while watching Gingrich lead the mob in cheering against the poor and black. I meant Newt would lead the mob in a lynching.

Negligently_Joe January 17, 2012 at 6:31 am

One could argue that deploying a "boys will be boys" defense of soldiers desecrating corpses does more to denigrate and deminish our military than accurately calling said desecration despicable. But that would require one to believe that our troops were capable of doing any better.

Frankly, Rick Perry just managed to show more contempt for our military than if he'd just called them baby-killers.

hagajim January 17, 2012 at 11:25 am

I figure he pretty much called them out of control babykillers.

reliefsinn January 17, 2012 at 12:46 pm

This "boys will be boys" attitude is interesting, as Perry shows no compassion for underage criminals, who were held to adult standards and executed until the Supreme Court outlawed it. Neither does he give one hoot about executing mentally ill individuals, or people who were present at a murder but did not actually commit the crime.
If you are not depressed enough today, click on the link :http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2011/09/02/310875/rick-perrys-execution-record-includes-the-deaths-of-juveniles-and-the-mentally-disabled/

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:29 pm

"soldiers desecrating corpses does more to denigrate and deminish our military than accurately calling said desecration despicable"

It IS despicable, and makes us look terrible in the eyes of pretty much the entire rest of the world…
But maybe that's what war really is?
Maybe this will force at least a few people to stop pretending that we're doing these countries a favor by invading them and taking their stuff — or at best, that it's "just business", like the Corleone family?
War is an ugly, hateful thing that doesn't benefit anybody, and while I'm certainly not defending the desecration of corpses, or even excusing same, I think most Americans are so far removed from war except for the sort of carefully selected rah-rah coverage they see on the news, that they've forgotten that war is, you know, A BAD THING, that can make monsters out of ordinary people?
I don't know, feel free to jump in and call me crazy, or that I'm not supporting the troops, or whatever, but I do think that some people are actually shocked to be reminded that kiling the foreigners is not 100% noble.

Negligently_Joe January 17, 2012 at 6:34 am

Also dear god we really need to keep these fucking assholes out of political office, forever.

freakishlywrong January 17, 2012 at 6:38 am

These "debates" just leave me feeling bludgeoned. And the "media" is more concerned about who "won" as opposed the the insane, ratfucking crazy substance of what comes out of these hateful fucks mouths.

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 7:50 am

The heartening thing is that this shit isn't making them anymore popular. It may not be hurting them as much as it should, and we won't know until November, but the president has sustained a statistical tie against Romney every month for like forever, so far. And, really, maybe I'm being naive, but I don't think it's that close. I think that when people go to the polls in November that the so-called undecideds will break for the devil they know, instead of the devil they know that will fire their asses.

hagajim January 17, 2012 at 11:27 am

That is a good point. I know the MSM has to play up the horse race dealio to promote rarings (or whatever)….but even the dumb jocks at ESPN could do deeper analysis on "what" these asshats are saying than the newsreaders are.

Isyaignert January 17, 2012 at 3:03 pm

Dood, you're freekishly right on this one! I hate those fukkin' haters!

johnnyzhivago January 17, 2012 at 7:22 am

What's this BS from Ron Paul about "doing to other nations as you would have them do to us???" Sounds like there's a congressional district in Texas that could use some remedial drone attacks to teach them about sending pansies to Congress!!!

johnnyzhivago January 17, 2012 at 7:25 am

Re-enslaving blacks is a good idea for our economy, but this time around can we add Mexicans and gays? I could use some free work done on my lawn and I wouldn't mind some inexpensive, but high quality interior decorating work.

cheetojeebus January 17, 2012 at 8:25 am

You have not lived until you get some gay finish carpentry done. I won't even mention the frisson of floor refinishing.

An_Outhouse January 17, 2012 at 9:16 am

Remember, you have to feed them or they die.

Nothingisamiss January 17, 2012 at 12:58 pm

And exercise them! Those muscles don't build themselves. And the grooming bills…Oy.

arihaya January 17, 2012 at 7:33 am

Blah-sphemy !!!

johnnyzhivago January 17, 2012 at 7:47 am

Hopefully America will urinate on these fools in November…

BaldarTFlagass January 17, 2012 at 7:52 am

Is it still 2011? If so, fuck me, I've been post-dating all my checks by a year! Sorry, mortgage company!

alzronnie January 17, 2012 at 7:54 am

"First of all, macaca…"

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 7:55 am

These bastards would boo Jesus Christ, himself, if he were allowed to ask a question at one of these debates. Suffice it to say that we'd hear "Jew" and "dirty fucking hippy" thrown around quite a lot, that night.

So-called conservatives are why America can't have nice things.

smashedinhat January 17, 2012 at 8:02 am

This Republican nomination process requires a logo for marketing purposes. I recommend a dog dragging it's ass across the carpet under the approving glare of cameras and applauding viewers.

I want a coffee mug.

Ruhe January 17, 2012 at 9:09 am

I think you should get that coffee mug.

jus_wonderin January 17, 2012 at 9:56 am

Make sure it is shrink wrapped.

thebeatgoeson January 17, 2012 at 10:08 am

Beautiful!

Toomush_Infer January 17, 2012 at 10:32 am

Another new business, fostered by Crazo-conservatism!…

Preacher_Griz January 17, 2012 at 8:04 am

If the US govt left us alone we would have taken care of the negro and all his needs on our plantations for Kingdom Come. Free market principles were working just fine.

But when they invaded us and burned down our plantations, what did they expect??!!! They had to come up with govt welfare to replace our Plantations.

Plantations = free market
govt welfare = socialism

bfddad January 17, 2012 at 8:11 am

Wait a minute here – Perry says he saw this all in the sand of Iran in '79 – exactly whose army was he with, and which side was he on?

weejee January 17, 2012 at 9:00 am

Rickie was a Khomeini Kommando? Who knew?

Ruhe January 17, 2012 at 9:09 am

Perhaps he was there to bake the cake.

Toomush_Infer January 17, 2012 at 10:33 am

The Ostrich Brigade….

Baconzgood January 17, 2012 at 8:12 am

Juan? Build the dang fence already!!!!

cheetojeebus January 17, 2012 at 8:27 am

Their methods are unsound.

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 8:29 am

OT: I don't know how long he's been on CNN, but I can not stand this smug, conservative Will Cain guy. What is it about Texans, young and old, that's so off-putting? There is something about him so punchable.

Monsieur_Grumpe January 17, 2012 at 8:43 am

You're up early. I'm still fuzzy around the edges. Getting too old for these debates.
Groan.

swordfis January 17, 2012 at 8:50 am

I hope that Juan Williams' nest egg permits him the freedom to punch out Newt Gingrich in the middle of the next debate. Now THAT would be teevee. And thumbs down to Wonkette for making me watch at least a minute of these living emetics first thing in the morning. Next debate, can you put up an Animal Planet clip of mandrills flinging *** at each other, and pretend it's a live feed? That would be more appetizing. And wouldn't it be great if these deplorable bigots were to crawl up each others assholes like a giant, stinking matrioshka doll for their final performance?

thebeatgoeson January 17, 2012 at 10:26 am

a la South Park "Whore Off" with Mr. Slave and Paris Hilton?!

ThundercatHo January 17, 2012 at 10:38 am

Many upfists for "living emetics".

Nothingisamiss January 17, 2012 at 1:00 pm

There's so much to upfist in this comment.

SpiderCrab January 17, 2012 at 8:58 am

I can't believe that Mitt R would just totally blow-off the Big Foot vote. I'm tired of being taken for granted by the republicans.

ThundercatHo January 17, 2012 at 10:40 am

Plus, he's gonna piss off those "Searching for Bigfoot" people. Those folks have a deep and abiding faith.

ElPinche January 17, 2012 at 10:56 am

He can make it up with a press conference and a simple squatch call

Crowe2011 January 17, 2012 at 8:59 am

"Yes, they need to be punished for what they did, but to say that what they did was unacceptable why… that's unacceptable". I'd say Perry's presence on stage meant there was a village missing its idiot, but clearly the audience is that village and in that moment of saying something utterly fatuous and incoherent Perry became their Idiot King. South Carolina continues to be an utter disgrace.

Ruhe January 17, 2012 at 9:08 am

So I guess when Newt refers to "Liberal confusion" he's not talking about the way a dolt like Perry can spread "confusion" so "liberally". One of the oldest cudgels used by the right to beat on Liberals is the label "moral relativism" but what can you call it when a prominent Republican defends the behavior of those piss-happy Marines by arguing that the Taliban "did it first". "Okay you dirty Afghans…we'll be true to our moral principles just as soon as you are too." ???

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:39 pm

"One of the oldest cudgels used by the right to beat on Liberals is the label "moral relativism""

Translation: We're not foaming at the mouth, sex-phobic misogynists.

weejee January 17, 2012 at 9:08 am

If we elect Perry el Presidente will he be the first to serve who can't sign his name? Don't they teach cursive at A&M? And if you must print to make your mark, it is HeLpfuL tO KeEp tRacK of uPper aNd loWeR caSe.

mrblifil January 17, 2012 at 9:13 am

Watching Newt rag on blahs made my penis be little.

anniegetyerfun January 17, 2012 at 12:18 pm

I belive that Newt's primary effect on most people is, in fact, wang-shrinkage.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 1:40 pm

Only on half the population. The rest of us, our ladyparts slam shut with an audible "clank!".

PsycWench January 17, 2012 at 9:15 am

Dang, my college had Juan Williams give a speech a few years ago and I'm sure they had to cough up a good honorarium. If we had just waited for a Gingrich presidency, he might have been free.
Except that, you know, a college…we can't be supporting those bastions of free thought. Never mind.

An_Outhouse January 17, 2012 at 9:15 am

Shorter Newt: Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah

I miss Shely.

Bluestatelibel January 17, 2012 at 9:18 am

Right at the beginning of the debate, the South Carolinians cheered loudly when one candidate said something to the effect of "defying" the federal government. I thought to myself, "Careful now, South Carolina, you tried that once before. Didn't work out so well, did it?"

Chichikovovich January 17, 2012 at 9:20 am

What about the Confederate flag? You can't have a South Carolina Primary without all the Republicans kicking and elbowing over the position as "most enthusiastic about flying the Confederate flag over the SC statehouse". Especially because the only way to pander any more than they already have on this one is to urge flying it along with the American flag over every government building nationwide. Or to urge that will urge that States should have the option, if they choose, of simply replacing Old Glory with the Stars and Bars. Which at least would have the advantage of making the symbolism conform to the Republican's actual practice of refighting the Civil War.

not that Dewey January 17, 2012 at 9:34 am

It's the one issue on which these fucks will argue in favor of appeasement.

Chichikovovich January 17, 2012 at 9:48 am

Appeasement? I wish. They're for unconditional surrender.

carolinaswamp January 17, 2012 at 11:48 am

You haven't been keeping up. The Confederate flag is now flown in front of the State House, rather than over the State House. This was the "compromise" brokered a few years ago. Many in SC can't understand why the Blahs don't find this solution adequate and continue to encourage boycotting our fine state.

Chichikovovich January 17, 2012 at 12:26 pm

Ah, so that was the "compromise", eh? I am behind the times.

I suppose we should count ourselves lucky that the "compromise" wasn't to take it down from the statehouse but have it held aloft on the lawn by an honor guard of SC National Guard soldiers in Confederate Uniforms.

[Of course, black Guardsmen would be welcome in that honor guard, because, y'know, lots of and lots of blacks fought willingly for the South in the War Between the States. True fact. Heard it on Rush.]

GOPCrusher January 17, 2012 at 12:57 pm

Probably trying to get off the Democratic Plantation.

GOPCrusher January 17, 2012 at 12:56 pm

IT'S NOT A RACIST SYMBOL! IT'S HERITAGE!

Pres.VerminSupreme January 17, 2012 at 9:21 am

C'mon, urinating on hated objects is a matter of national pride…

'Peeing Calvin' Decals Now Recognized As Vital Channel Of National Discourse

not that Dewey January 17, 2012 at 9:30 am

Wait, wait… Don't boo me!

Allmighty_Manos January 17, 2012 at 9:36 am

My heart flutters every time I think of Marines pissing on our opponents. And under a Perry presidency we will remember that moment with a piss memorial: right next to the Iwo Jima one.

DahBoner January 17, 2012 at 9:37 am

If only Juan was Jewish.

And crippled….

DonnyKerabotsos January 17, 2012 at 9:48 am

and poor…

DemmeFatale January 17, 2012 at 11:06 am

…and gay.

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 11:20 pm

…and a soldier.

prommie January 17, 2012 at 9:43 am

Someone please just hold me.

Limeylizzie January 17, 2012 at 10:08 am

I'm here baby, just cry it out.

prommie January 17, 2012 at 10:30 am

Boys don't cry.

Barb January 17, 2012 at 10:11 am

I'll make you some cocoa.

prommie January 17, 2012 at 10:31 am

With rum? Kalua? What can you put in cocoa?

Toomush_Infer January 17, 2012 at 10:39 am

Both, baby….

weejee January 17, 2012 at 9:52 am

OT sorta,

Will our Wonkette go blah tomorrow to protest SOPA? Warning for you scholars out there, Wikipedia is going is going blah tomorrow so do your term paper plagiarizing early.

starfanglednut January 17, 2012 at 9:56 am

How much does a janitor in an underfunded school get paid? $15/hour? Divide that by 30, and each very, very urban kid will be making 50 cents an hour.If each kid works 20 hours a week, they'll have an extra $ 10 a week. Wow. Newt sure cares about blah people.

An_Outhouse January 17, 2012 at 9:58 am

OT: Does Frontline think Wonkette attracts PBS watchers?

LiveToServeYa January 17, 2012 at 10:19 am

Newt, savior of the working poor, earned his credit line with Tiffany's the old fashioned way: by being a professional fathead. The man is a disgrace to professors, historians, or just about anyone who can form a coherent thought. Which excludes Rick Perry, obviously.

Also, they need to work on the flexibility of Mitten's programming. He isn't self-aware, yet, and he's still very fuzzy on the nature of reality. An obvious alpha release.

Dave Dufour January 17, 2012 at 10:20 am

"By the end of this GOP campaign, we’re pretty sure these clowns will be openly arguing the merits of enslaving Africans to “get our economy back on track.” 2011 is a lot like 1911, 1811, 1711 and probably 1611!"

You're an ass.

Chichikovovich January 17, 2012 at 10:27 am

I'm feeling a little desnarked this morning, so I'll just observe that the Thin-Skinned Toxic Salamander, at the end of that clip, says that the unemployed don't have jobs because they've never learned how to get jobs. In Newt's view, unemployment arises because the poor are too stupid to get jobs(and, presumably, haven't learned self-discipline either) . Newt's solution to unemployment is to teach the poor to stop being so stupid, so they can get jobs, get better jobs and then "own the jobs". (I have no idea what that last one means. Perhaps it's a code for "earn enough money to buy themselves out of indentured servitude"?)

The Republican audience of course is nodding and thinking: "Yeah, there's lots of jobs. My cousin Wendy knows a guy who posted a job cleaning his business [Editor's note: a well-below-minimum-wage job cleaning vomit from a dive bar's bathrooms from 12 pm to 3 am, working for a guy known throughout town as a sadistic psycho who cheats his employees.] and y'know wuht? Nobody even applied. Those people just don't want to work."

I just want to make sure everyone here knows that I hate that pathologically dishonest tub of lard who gives PhD's everywhere a bad name.

Toomush_Infer January 17, 2012 at 10:44 am

What is it?, you and Serolf, both….Tuesday? Winter? – 'cause Crazo-Conservatives in SC won't change until the day Jezuss forgets to take them home with him on his fiery chariot….

Fukui_sanYesOta January 17, 2012 at 12:47 pm

It's because they're too lazy to get fucking associate degrees. Newt knows that as soon as you pay fucktons of money to the University of Phoenix for an associate degree in owl waxing then companies will fucking line up to hire you.

Oh wait. He doesn't live in the real world. He lives in Republican Land where if you're unemployed then facts don't matter and it's your own fault.

Biff January 17, 2012 at 1:18 pm

Coming soon: waxer-of-owls username.

GOPCrusher January 17, 2012 at 1:00 pm

They were stupid enough to expect someone to hand them a paycheck. If they were smart, they would of gotten out and made their own job.
That and poor people are poor because they choose to be that way.

kissawookiee January 17, 2012 at 10:27 am

I do not understand why people who rail against the $5-an-hour Messicans stealing American jobs turn around and cheer the idea of replacing an American worker with 30 $5-per-day kids.

starfanglednut January 17, 2012 at 10:28 am

I never watch these things. I figure it will be bad for my health. But last night, out of some weird curiosity, I tuned in for about 5 minutes. In that time, I saw the aforementioned exchange between Newt and Juan Williams, Romney refuse to answer a direct question about releasing his taxes, and, (which I have yet to see mentioned in the press), the cracker audience boo when it was mentioned that Romney's father was born in Mexico. Friends, these are awful,awful human beings.

Toomush_Infer January 17, 2012 at 10:47 am

I'm told that SC has been invaded recently by high-paid, well educated blacks and latinos who hate the bitter cold of the north….not sure what the statistics are this year…

prommie January 17, 2012 at 10:32 am

The GOP has found its 2012 campaign theme: Piss on the Poor! By "Poor" we mean blacks!

spinozasgod January 17, 2012 at 10:38 am

there is only one thing republicans hate more than being called racists….blah people.

Toomush_Infer January 17, 2012 at 10:47 am

Oh, SuperPac fodder….!

carlgt1 January 17, 2012 at 10:49 am

poor Juan, he sold out to the Tea Party & Faux News & the Repugs — only to find out he's still a lazy nigra in their eyes.

This meme of "Obama is the food stamp prez" is pretty clever as Repugs go – I mean they can totally ignore the fact that this is the biggest depression (& thanks to the Repugs) since food stamps were invented by libruls etc.

And somehow in the midst of a lack of jobs, putting millions of poor kids in the work force will help? yeah, a kid making slave wages taking his mommy & daddy's source of income will really help!

DemmeFatale January 17, 2012 at 11:11 am

Reap what you sow, Juan.
Reap. What. You. Sow.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 2:32 pm

^^
^
I'm reminded of Dorothy Parker's observation: "I once knew a man named Aaron Eisenberg. He changed his name to Erik Colton. Nothing ever became of him".

carlgt1 January 17, 2012 at 5:33 pm

I just hope the cheering South Carolinians are the last gasp of white-trash AmeriKKKa – because these hicks have screwed up this country for 200 years.

And it's a "fait accompli" with Romney long (months) ago so it's laughable they get "fired up" by Gingrich or Paul or Cain.

io9k9s January 17, 2012 at 10:57 am

the blahs this the blahs that…. but what about the Chinky Eyes?

Mahousu January 17, 2012 at 11:00 am

David Brooks wakes up: I sometimes wonder if the Republican Party has become the receding roar of white America as it pines for a way of life that will never return.

This being David Brooks, though, he sees it as a good thing – the roaring, that is, not the fact it's doomed.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 2:36 pm

"I sometimes wonder if the Republican Party has become the receding roar of white America as it pines for a way of life that will never return."

Wow! Sharp as a *marble*, that one is!

Allmighty_Manos January 17, 2012 at 11:00 am

John Winthrop spoke of a 'City Upon A Hill' that would be an example for the whole world. The Tea Party speaks of a second story outhouse where the poor, dark and young are chained underneath.

jesus_vs_gojira January 17, 2012 at 12:01 pm

Fox News correspondent Juan Williams drew sustained boos

How to phrase this delicately. Juan, this is what happens when you're an Uncle Tom.

DemmeFatale January 17, 2012 at 11:13 am

Yep.
Couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

BZ1 January 17, 2012 at 11:27 am

When Rick Perry describes the proceedings as a gong show, pot meets kettle …

MinAgain January 17, 2012 at 11:42 am

Just remember…these are the same people who cheer their state university by screaming, "Go, Cocks!"

Fukui_sanYesOta January 17, 2012 at 12:51 pm

and if you don't scream that they'll just ram it down your throat anyway.

tessiee January 17, 2012 at 2:43 pm

To be fair, at least *some* of those people are aware that that's the team's name.

ttommyunger January 17, 2012 at 11:49 am

I can just imagine the chants of "One of us, one of us" coming from the crowd whenever Santorum spoke.

natoslug January 17, 2012 at 12:39 pm

Like the census, a re-enactment of Sherman's march to the sea needs to be held every ten years. That's the only way the fucksticks will ever get it through their heads that they lost the War of Southern Treason and that it is time to join civilization.

NewtsChicknNeck January 17, 2012 at 2:05 pm

I love bullshit time-inflated claims (esp. when delivered with the level of condescension few other than Newton can achieve).

First of all, Juan [if that's your real name], Barack Hussein Obama put more people on welfare…blah, blah, blah, blah. Second of all, you blah dude, The Dark Knight and Avatar made more money than just about every movie ever made before 2008 (nevermind that tickets are $75 and they were produced in the last three years). Third of all, why haven't we built any damn roads 'round these lovely parts? Fourth of all, let's cut taxes some more, even if it means no new roads. Finally, give me a minute to come up with another James Bond villain's plot-point to pass off as a policy proposal. How dare you ask me such shit about race-baiting. Race-baiting implies nuance and subtlety. I'm a republican. Our voters don't understand those things. We don't like black people. Rick & Rick-er have tried to make that clear. Do you need me to make it clearer?

owhatever January 17, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Oh, I hope they can sandwich in a few more debates before South Carolina secedes again. Obama laffs. The DNC saves money.

rickmaci January 17, 2012 at 3:57 pm

What can you say? It's South Crackerlina. If Obama gets re-elected, I'm all for returning Reconstruction to the areas of the US south of a mean latitude of 39°43′20″ N. We can get it right this time, I think.

carlgt1 January 17, 2012 at 7:34 pm

as long as we get to liberate their oil & other natural resources (iced tea etc)

Pat_Pending January 17, 2012 at 2:19 am

Juan in a million?

smokefillednewyear January 17, 2012 at 2:22 am

A million to Juan. (or two million)

DrunkIrishman January 17, 2012 at 2:31 am

Juana fight about it?

Negropolis January 17, 2012 at 2:54 am

Chinese Yuan Libel!

cheaphits January 17, 2012 at 9:18 am

Newt juans to fight about it, but Willard just juans it to be over.

memzilla January 17, 2012 at 2:53 am

Takes Juan to know Juan.

Isyaignert January 17, 2012 at 2:59 am

No, let's have a peace pipe with some mariJUANa.

emmelemm January 17, 2012 at 3:14 am

Juwanna Man?

mannacler January 17, 2012 at 3:10 am

If you can't be with the Juan you love, love the Juan you're with.

DrunkIrishman January 17, 2012 at 4:53 am

It's a JUANderful life.

smokefillednewyear January 17, 2012 at 7:31 am

Juan, two, three times a lady

SorosBot January 17, 2012 at 11:12 am

But depending on the direction, going over the state line might just take you into Georgia, which outside of Atlanta is just as bad.

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