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It was a great Republican debate in South Carolina, we bet! But there was a rerun of an infomercial we decided to watch instead, while eating rat poison and singing disco songs about urinating on the dead enemy in Europe or something. Here’s the debate host guy, broadcaster Juan Williams, rudely interrupting Newt Gingrich’s standing ovation by asking the Newt if maybe it was uncool to say black people and poor people just lack a certain something, because they are black and poor. By the end of this GOP campaign, we’re pretty sure these clowns will be openly arguing the merits of enslaving Africans to “get our economy back on track.” 2011 is a lot like 1911, 1811, 1711 and probably 1611!

The other thing that happened, at this debate, was that Rick Perry got some huge applause for defending the Marines desecrating the corpses of whatever people the Marines were killing that day. It’s inspirational, as always:

Was that a joke about The Gong Show, a weird counterculture stoner television series from the 1970s? Is Perry drunk again, but this time on Mexican marijuana?

Let’s get the consensus view:

Republican presidential front-runner Mitt Romney appeared rattled on Tuesday night after being challenged by his rivals in a televised debate over his failure to disclose tax returns and the millions of dollars spent by his supporters on negative ads.

The debate, at times raucous, came only days before the potentially decisive South Carolina primary, possibly the last state in which Romney’s main opponents can feasibly stop his run for the Republican nomination.

Although Romney enjoys an 8% poll lead over his nearest rival, Newt Gingrich, his uncomfortable performance watched by millions of viewers, many of them from South Carolina, may have cost him votes.

So, Mitt Romney is still in the race. Good for him! And if it’s an “uncomfortable performance” by Mitt Romney, you can be very certain that Mitt Romney showed up and took part in the debate. As for the other candidates remaining in this five-man race to the bottom, Rick Santorum was probably pretty quiet due to a mouth full of semen, and Ron Paul probably won the debate by handing out copies of his famous Southern newsletters. [The Guardian/New York Times/USA Today]

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