YOUR NEW NELSON MANDELA  12:45 pm January 12, 2012

James O’Keefe ‘N Friends Maybe Going To Prison, For Being Idiots

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

Prison is a great place to turn tricks!

Doofus dildo monster James O’Keefe’s Project Veritas has irrevocably proven that activists with his group were able to obtain a few ballots in the New Hampshire primary under false pretenses by assuming the identities of very recently deceased people whose names still appeared on the rolls, which is VOTER FRAUD. See how easy it was to cast a fraudulent ballot without an ID in this isolated type of instance? They filmed it, in order to prove just how easily they were able to commit fraud. Look, here is the video that shows them doing the fraud! They put it on the Internet! Here world, we’ve committed a felony! And now the video is being investigated by the New Hampshire state Attorney General’s office, and local election officials want them prosecuted, and James O’Keefe can’t understand why he hasn’t preemptively been awarded next year’s Pulitzer yet.

Patch.com reports:

[Nashua City Clerk Paul] Bergeron said this morning he believes the filmmakers may have committed a federal crime, as well, if they crossed state lines to record the undercover video, and should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

“It’s against the law to steal, so if you go out and steal and then put up a video and say, ‘Look, I stole something,’ that’s a crime. What these people did was a crime; they stole a person’s identity and used it to ty to obtain a ballot that would be used in a state election,” said Bergeron.

“They recorded it without election officials’ knowledge, which apears to be a violation of our New Hampshire wiretapping codes, and some of these are out of state residents, so I don’t know if violations of wiretapping or ID theft could hold up in court, but if they crossed state lines to commit these crimes, it may be a federal crime as well. This is serious; we won’t tolerate voter fraud, regardless of what the intent might be,” Bergeron said.

What is the big DEEAAAAL James O’Keefe demands to know. The media basically just commits felonies all the time, THAT IS HOW REPORTING WORKS, sheesh.

“I notice a contempt and a hostility from the media establishment towards us,” O’Keefe told the [Boston] Herald yesterday. “The journalism establishment is not very friendly to me or to our work product, when they’ve been using these tactics for decades.”

We liked him better when he was trying to trick CNN ladies onto cruise boats full of lube. [Patch/ Boston Herald]

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 216 comments }

Madfall January 12, 2012 at 12:47 pm

I pray to the gods of schadenfreude and irony that this imprisonment goes ahead.

Millennial Malaise January 12, 2012 at 1:00 pm

I would sacrifice a half a million of my unborn fetuses to see this happen.

Generation[redacted] January 12, 2012 at 1:08 pm

Sacrifice a half million potential lives for a moment of pleasure? Shoot, I did that in the shower this morning!

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:10 pm

I *was* gonna make fetus donuts, but…
OK, I'm in.

Dashboard Buddha January 12, 2012 at 1:10 pm

I join you in that prayer.

GOPCrusher January 12, 2012 at 3:49 pm

I'm bothered when I read them say "They MAY have committed a Federal crime". Leaves the door open for the possibility of them walking away, scot-free, with a "boys will be boys" pat on the back.
This asshole needs to be in a Federal pound you in the ass prison for the maximum sentence.

Barb January 12, 2012 at 12:47 pm

This should quell his yen for prison food, ass raping and toilet wine. Good luck!

Mahousu January 12, 2012 at 12:51 pm

I dunno, he looks like he has a high tolerance level for at least a couple of items on that list.

Barb January 12, 2012 at 12:54 pm

He's he looks like he's been begging for acorn up his ass for a while.

bureaucrap January 12, 2012 at 1:44 pm

I see what you did there.

Barb January 12, 2012 at 1:47 pm

Thank you!

JustPixelz January 12, 2012 at 1:51 pm

While in prison he can pretend his name is "blow me bitch" which is what people will call him.

ifthethunderdontgetya January 12, 2012 at 12:48 pm

The Schaden Freudes Itself, as I love to say.
~

nounverb911 January 12, 2012 at 12:48 pm

Jimbo better stock up on the santorum.

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 12:53 pm

Oh, I'm sure the santorum flows freely at Butt Rape Federal Correctional Facility.

MittsHairHelmet January 12, 2012 at 12:49 pm

It's not a crime if you tape it and tell everyone about it right after you do it. That's criminal law 101.

sarah_connor January 12, 2012 at 1:00 pm

is why those marines will likely go unpunished…

sarah_connor January 12, 2012 at 1:03 pm

and why those marines will get little more than a slap on their wrists…

Chet Kincaid January 12, 2012 at 1:40 pm

A slap WHERE?

smokefillednewyear January 12, 2012 at 1:24 pm

Isn't it still considered a brain felony?

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:11 pm

I'm not sure exactly what a "brain felony" is, but I do know that you can't have a stomach ache unless you have a stomach.

PsycWench January 12, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Only if you put it on Facebook.

Mojopo January 12, 2012 at 3:02 pm

It really takes a special kind of a-hole to film himself committing fraud. This so reminds me of the kids picking fights with hobos on YouTube, or sorority girls having a drunk game of mailbox baseball. "Ooops, did I do bad? Are you gonna call the cops?" Pulitzer Prize in-fuckin-deed.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 12, 2012 at 4:10 pm

That is why I tape and post all the times I do blow with hookers. Can't touch me now!

nounverb911 January 12, 2012 at 12:50 pm

"The media basically just commits felonies all the time, "
Fox Noise claims O'Keefe is being targeted in 3…2…1…

JustPixelz January 12, 2012 at 1:52 pm

That's why Judith Miller is in prison.

Baconzgood January 12, 2012 at 12:51 pm

Hey you gotta break a few laws to make laws about blacks and poors not voting.

Texan_Bulldog January 12, 2012 at 1:11 pm

I didn't know there were any blah Republicans in NH. Maybe that's where James went wrong–needs more ACORN!!!1!!1

Chet Kincaid January 12, 2012 at 1:41 pm

Yes, the absurdity.

memzilla January 12, 2012 at 12:51 pm

Can't wait to hear Der Rushenführer defend this toad: "Federal election fraud, illegal wiretapping, and conspiracy… in defense of liberty… is no vice!"

No, it's about twenty years of making small rocks out of big rocks at Leavenworth.

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:13 pm

*sings*
"I'm breakin' rocks in the hot sun,
I fought the law and the law won"

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 12:51 pm

"They filmed it, in order to prove just how easily they were able to commit fraud."

The Gang That Couldn't Shoot Straight. That there is a big giant heap o'dumbass.

Baconzgood January 12, 2012 at 1:03 pm

I only shoplifted it to show my kids what happens when you steal.

Mojopo January 12, 2012 at 3:06 pm

I only filmed the directions for check-washing, and then cashed those checks, to show my parole officer how stupid people are to put things in the mail.

Lascauxcaveman January 12, 2012 at 7:23 pm

I only stole all those cars to try to convince Detroit to add more adavanced anti-theft features. And for the money. The chop shop was giving me over a grand for each of those babies.

smokefillednewyear January 12, 2012 at 12:51 pm

Was he dressed in his pimp costume when filming this? ('Cause you know, everybody loves a pimp!)

HempDogbane January 12, 2012 at 12:54 pm

That costume alone merits 10-20 years in the slammer.

smokefillednewyear January 12, 2012 at 1:00 pm

Pimp name: Bishop Jim Magic Queef

FNMA January 12, 2012 at 1:52 pm

It's hard out there for a pimp.

Not_So_Much January 12, 2012 at 12:52 pm

I somehow doubt that his 'pimp hand is strong' enough to emerge unsullied by his prison experience…

GregComlish January 12, 2012 at 12:52 pm

When will somebody upload the video that shows how easy it is to beat the shit out of James O'Keefe?

heathenette January 12, 2012 at 2:03 pm

Thank you.

Generation[redacted] January 12, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Out of concern for his safety, of course.

Callyson January 12, 2012 at 12:52 pm

So, the IOKIYAR defense does not fly? In *New Hampshire* yet?
And please send him to Maricopa County. Pink undies for Dildo Man!

Negligently_Joe January 12, 2012 at 1:34 pm

This might be a tad more of the somewhat more traditional, IOKIYAWaC (It's okay if you are white and connected).

MittsHairHelmet January 12, 2012 at 12:52 pm

I mean don't you remember when Woodward and Bernstein broke into the Democratic headquarters at the Watergate hotel to prove that Nixon could've done that if he wanted to?

Chillwillard January 12, 2012 at 12:53 pm

Who's the pimp now, James? Just remember: the trick is to kick someone's ass the first day, or become somebody's bitch. Then everything will be alright.

MrsBiggTime January 12, 2012 at 12:59 pm

My guess is Door #2.

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 1:01 pm

Yeah, just make like you're Rorschach, in "Watchmen," and it will be smooth sailing for you.

doloras January 12, 2012 at 4:45 pm

"I'm not sailing on the dildo boat with you. You're sailing on the dildo boat with ME!!!"

Gainsbourg69 January 12, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Don't let them hear you crying either, James.

GOPCrusher January 12, 2012 at 5:02 pm

Bite the pillow, fucker.

OkieDokieDog January 12, 2012 at 12:53 pm

I'm not a member of the media establishment and I have nothing but contempt and disgust for James Dildo O'Keefe. I'll let his future cell mates dole out the much deserved hostility.

Nesnora January 12, 2012 at 12:56 pm

"HAY GUYS I'M WHITE I DON'T UNDERSTAND- THAT MEANS IT'S A FUNNY AND NOT A CRIME!"

freakishlywrong January 12, 2012 at 12:57 pm

Throw this twafwaffle in the hoosegow and throw away the key.

Redhead January 12, 2012 at 12:57 pm

“The journalism establishment is not very friendly to me or to our work product, when they’ve been using these tactics for decades.”

Note to O'Keefe: Murdoch's UK holdings and their tactics used in their tabloids do not constitute "the journalism establishment" or the tactics used by said establishment.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 12, 2012 at 8:30 pm

And, yet, Ironically, Murdoch's holdings are the only ones that are friendly to Mr. O'Keeffe.

Baconzgood January 12, 2012 at 12:57 pm
memzilla January 12, 2012 at 1:01 pm

It's The James O'Keefe Intern Program.

DaRooster January 12, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Like the guy in our town that robbed a bookstore (yes a fucking bookstore WTF?!?!) and bragged about it on FB.

Biff January 12, 2012 at 2:51 pm

Hey, at least you have a bookstore. Not kidding.

BigDumbRedDog January 12, 2012 at 12:57 pm

Here's hoping that while he's locked up he can do an undercover exposé on prison rape.

widestanceshakedown January 12, 2012 at 1:29 pm

. . .to show how easy it is to make him squeal like the proverbial pig?

DaRooster January 12, 2012 at 1:59 pm

He is setting up inserting the camera now.

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 12:57 pm

"James O’Keefe can’t understand why he hasn’t preemptively been awarded next year’s Pulitzer yet."

Oh, I'm sure he'll get the Conservapulitzer.

memzilla January 12, 2012 at 1:01 pm

Darwin Award For Journalism.

Dudleydidwrong January 12, 2012 at 4:13 pm

He'll be pullin something, cause somebody is going to say "Pull it, sir!" And it will be a real prize.

MrsBiggTime January 12, 2012 at 12:58 pm

Next from O'Keefe: the sex-slave-for-cigarettes trade in state prisons: one man's experience.

GunToting[Redacted] January 12, 2012 at 1:28 pm

According to some weekend MSNBC viewing, since most prisons have banned smoking, bitches are now exchanged for containers of tuna or mackerel. Oily fish is the new currency.

MrsBiggTime January 12, 2012 at 1:50 pm

Good to know they're looking out for prisoners' health, but according to the sturgeon general, smoked fish may be hazardous to your health as well.
Whatever. Soon ol' James will be Chicken of the C-Block.

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:17 pm

"but according to the
sturgeon general,
smoked fish may be hazardous to your health as well."

I see what you did there. XD

GOPCrusher January 12, 2012 at 5:04 pm

Wonder what they use the oil for?

elviouslyqueer January 12, 2012 at 12:58 pm

Enjoy prison, bottom-boy.

SayItWithWookies January 12, 2012 at 12:58 pm

Well this should settle the debate over whether we need more restrictive voting ID laws — apparently enforcing the existing ones (the familiar anti-gun-control trope) works just fine.

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 12:59 pm

It's OK, they're just a bunch of wacky youngsters, and this is no worse than a harmless frat prank.

mrblifil January 12, 2012 at 12:59 pm

CONSERVADIVS R DUM.

VaWyo January 12, 2012 at 12:59 pm

"not friendly to our work product" ?? You are a dumbass and your work product is stupid. No one should be friendly to you.

memzilla January 12, 2012 at 12:59 pm

Finally, something good may come out of the Patriot Act!

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 12, 2012 at 1:00 pm

I'm sure Mr. O'Keefe will find many uses for his dildos in prison.

freakishlywrong January 12, 2012 at 1:00 pm

“The journalism establishment is not very friendly to me or to our work product"
a.)There is no "journalism establishment" you fuckwit, haven't you been paying attention?
b). Your "work product" is the Santorum of the media. And that's a low bar.

gurukalehuru January 12, 2012 at 1:01 pm

The fact that he got caught in the act, before showing the film, because one of the ladies at the voting place happened to have been married to one of the recently deceased people whose names were used, proves that his whole premise is wrong.

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 1:13 pm

"one of the ladies at the voting place happened to have been married to one of the recently deceased people"

Is that true? Cosmic fucking justice!! AHAHAHHAHAHA!

KenLayIsAlive January 12, 2012 at 10:39 pm

Please. The last thing James O'Keefe ever realizes about his stupid videos is that they were wrong.

"Oh the ACORN guy called the cops on me? Well, lets leave that out."

The guy is the biggest lying piece of shit that ever fucking had the spotlight on him.

Indiepalin January 12, 2012 at 1:01 pm

Next, filming himself robbing a bank, just to show how easy it is.

VaWyo January 12, 2012 at 1:03 pm

After that he needs to try to get a gun through airport security.

GunToting[Redacted] January 12, 2012 at 1:29 pm

Or wave one near the Presidential motorcade.

whiskeybaby January 12, 2012 at 4:11 pm

"Hey, guys, see how easy this i…"

[gunshot]

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 12, 2012 at 1:02 pm

I'm sure that FOX News, who constantly complained about the many illegal activities associated with OWS will have an in deep report on all of its shows about the illegal activities of activist Conservative press, highlighting Mr. O'Keefe. Right?

jus_wonderin January 12, 2012 at 1:04 pm

I am, at present, teaching my pig to fly.

emmelemm January 12, 2012 at 2:53 pm

My avatar approves.

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:20 pm

Outraged calls for pepper-spraying him begin in 3…
2…

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 12, 2012 at 1:02 pm

You know who else committed felonies related to elections in the name of Republican party?

BarackMyWorld January 12, 2012 at 1:13 pm

All of 'em, Katie!

(Sorry…had too.)

JustPixelz January 12, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Five Supreme Court Justices?

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 1:56 pm

G. Gordon Liddy?

Generation[redacted] January 12, 2012 at 2:37 pm

Sideshow Bob?

Limeylizzie January 12, 2012 at 3:46 pm

Republicans?

doloras January 12, 2012 at 4:53 pm

That head-in-a-jar guy from Futurama?

GOPCrusher January 12, 2012 at 5:07 pm

Ted Williams?

bikerlaureate January 12, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Charles Foster Kane ?

horsedreamer_1 January 13, 2012 at 2:22 am

George Steinbrenner?

chicken_thief January 12, 2012 at 1:03 pm

Once incarcerated, if Bubba films his ass raping of O'Queef, then it's just butt sex, not rape, amiright? And pretty much ok, cause it is documenting how easy it is to cornhole little Jimmy.

Lionel[redacted]Esq January 12, 2012 at 1:03 pm

Isn't it interesting that for all the complaints about ACORN and voter fraud, the only proof we have of actual voter fraud is by Republicans?

spinozasgod January 12, 2012 at 2:56 pm

I live in Wisconsin and the only voter fraud case was 2 elderly people who absentee voted and then voted in person because Rush encouraged it during the 2008 election to keep the lefties out of office

comrad_darkness January 12, 2012 at 3:35 pm

Projection is a bitch.

Rosie_Scenario January 12, 2012 at 3:58 pm

And stolen elections, also, too. See 2000 and 2004. And that old favorite Bush v. Gore.

WilliamHTaft January 12, 2012 at 1:03 pm

No fair! The liberals in my imagination get away with this all the time!

MissTaken January 12, 2012 at 1:04 pm

This is illegal??! But he's a white! Yet another example of diminishing white power thanks to all that competitive breeding.

ingloriousbytch January 12, 2012 at 1:04 pm

I can't wait until a few REAL pimps get a hold of O'Keefe's candy ass.

Generation[redacted] January 12, 2012 at 1:39 pm

He's going to be Butters' bottom bitch, do you know what I am saying?

CapnFatback January 12, 2012 at 1:05 pm

AN APPEAL TO CONSERVATIVE PARENTS:

Madams and Sirs,

Your sons or daughters may be considering a future career in arts or communications. They may be requesting video equipment or acing lessons for their birthday or bah mitzvah. I am here to implore you to quash any such aspirations and withhold any resources that may enable these delusional chimeras to take sway. Unless they are ready to renounce your political leanings, your children will succeed at little in their pursuit to become actors or rappers or "advocacy journalists," other than to serve as constant public reminders of their douchi-ness and of your failures as parents to prevent them from sticking their metaphorical forks into America's wall socket.

Yours in Crisis,

Cap'n Fatback

FlownOver January 12, 2012 at 1:17 pm

Oh, I dunno… if the thespian aspirations of conservatives' younglings are blocked, who will fill the openings (so to speak) in America's vital porn industry? Jerbs first!

CapnFatback January 12, 2012 at 1:21 pm

And no "acing" lessons required!

Dashboard Buddha January 12, 2012 at 1:06 pm

Hey assface…that's not contempt and a hostility…that's just Tuesday.

elviouslyqueer January 12, 2012 at 1:07 pm

O’Keefe told the Herald yesterday, “The journalism establishment is not very friendly to me or to our work product

Girl, be for real. Your calling yourself a journalist is about as "in the realm of fantasy" as my claiming to be a virgin.

WinterOuthouse January 12, 2012 at 5:52 pm

You're not a virgin?

Generation[redacted] January 12, 2012 at 1:07 pm

Uh oh. They're mad. Maybe he could smooth things over, by offering to fix their phones.

Guppy January 12, 2012 at 1:11 pm

Meh. If he could weasel his way out of charges in the Landrieu wiretapping incident, he can weasel his way out of this.

Generation[redacted] January 12, 2012 at 1:12 pm

I'm sure he'll have the best lawyer Fox News can buy.

Guppy January 12, 2012 at 1:13 pm

She's a JD and a DDS!

poorgradstudent January 12, 2012 at 1:13 pm

So in O'Keefe's Skool of Big Kid Journalism, the lesson is if you want a hard-hitting investigation on, say, violent sociopaths you should stab a loved one in the neck and watch the life drain from their eyes.

Fukui_sanYesOta January 12, 2012 at 1:18 pm

and film it. You should preferably wear an amusing costume while doing it as well – clown, maybe, or the hamburgler.

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:23 pm

??
I thought that was the John Wayne Gacy Skool of Journalism.

KeepFnThatChicken January 12, 2012 at 1:13 pm

In Iowa, maybe it could have mattered with eight little paper ballots between first and second place. But in NH where Magic Mitt trounced Santorum like a good Christian bully, the few votes they sneaked ain't shit.

outragedcitizen January 12, 2012 at 2:48 pm

That is the point totally lost on this dipshit. Anyone, (I'm looking at you GOP), who is going to commit voter fraud is going to do it in numbers with at least three zeros, maybe four or five zeros behind them not by stealing the id of a couple of dead guys.

GOPCrusher January 12, 2012 at 5:23 pm

As example, a recent Supreme Court election in Wisconsin.

EvilleMike January 13, 2012 at 8:22 am

I didn't see them actually walk away with any of the ballots – much less cast any votes. There were a coupla times when they took the ballot, but then handed it back.

But your point is a good one. If this is happening as much as they fear, then why would the Dems lose any important election?

BarackMyWorld January 12, 2012 at 1:13 pm

UPDATE: Pimpin' still not easy.

grandinquisitor January 12, 2012 at 1:28 pm

He should have listened to his Big Daddy Kane.

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:24 pm

I have a feeling that he'll be acquainted with *somebody's* Big Daddy Kane all too soon.

HateMachine January 12, 2012 at 2:34 pm

And contrary to what you may have heard, usually unnecessary.

CapnFatback January 12, 2012 at 1:14 pm

What did I miss? I just came back from the bathroom. It had been a while since I took an "O'Keefe's work product."

Fukui_sanYesOta January 12, 2012 at 1:16 pm

He noted that under New Hampshire's state Constitution, any resident who commits voter fraud can permanently lose their right to vote.

"If these are New Hampshire residents they should lose their right to vote forever, in addition to fines or imprisonment. I take it seriously, and people shouldn't dismiss this as just a harmless stunt; it's not," Bergeron said.

Ho ho ho. Fingers crossed, eh, readers?

emmelemm January 12, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Please please please please please….

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 1:16 pm

Journalism? Dude, the only place your tactics would qualify as journalism is on the "Eyewitness Wants to Know" segment on the local newscast. Maybe you can get a job pulling this kind of shit at the FOX affiliate in Missoula, Montana, once you get out on parole.

Terry January 12, 2012 at 1:57 pm

No, put him up in Wasilla, AK, where the only miscreants around to trap in stings are members of the extended Palin family.

mavenmaven January 12, 2012 at 1:19 pm

No, republican criminals don't go to jail nor do they need to account for criminal activities. Only blah people do.

Maman January 12, 2012 at 1:20 pm

Isn't he on parole or something? Wouldn't that automatically get him tossed? Can we argue it is a federal violation and get him tossed into SuperMax?

Fukui_sanYesOta January 12, 2012 at 1:29 pm

He's on probation and needs to get a magistrate to agree to any out-of-state journeys.

Hopefully he was in NH and forgot to ask permission.

Dashboard Buddha January 12, 2012 at 1:34 pm

When he's in Supermax he can write articles for Newsmax about sexual attacks made by the blacks.

(edited for your pleasure)

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 1:20 pm

"James O’Keefe ‘N Friends Maybe Going To Prison, For Being Idiots"

Hoist by their own petard! With all the doubling down on prison sentences that has gone on in this country with the rise of privatized incarceration firms and their lobbying of various legislatures for more severe sentences to be handed out, there's a lot more stupid people than criminals in jail these days.

BaldarTFlagass January 12, 2012 at 1:22 pm

I have the perfect cellmate for O'Queef.
http://www.avclub.com/articles/austin-powers-acto

MissTaken January 12, 2012 at 1:22 pm

I've never agreed with mandatory minimums, until just now.

Blueb4sunrise January 12, 2012 at 1:23 pm

Well, c'mon, to be fair……….

BWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

Radiotherapy January 12, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Let's hope he finds prison very blah.

Terry January 12, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Or comes out with a swastika tattooed on him in either a very sensitive or prominent place.

ElPinche January 12, 2012 at 1:35 pm

James O'Queef…now that's a guy that needs a golden shower.

Radiotherapy January 12, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Preferably after his boyfriends have eaten asparagus.

Biff January 12, 2012 at 3:06 pm

a guy whose corpse needs a golden shower.
/fixed

donner_froh January 12, 2012 at 1:39 pm

"I notice a contempt and a hostility from the media establishment towards us,” O’Keefe told the [Boston] Herald yesterday.

True only if "the media establishment" = "all sentient beings"

veritass January 12, 2012 at 1:39 pm

My namesake goes to jail. It's a sad day for veritass :(

Haha, just kidding. Fuck him.

James Michael Curley January 12, 2012 at 1:40 pm

Count II of the indictment should read "By performing acts in a manner which made the journalistic endeavors of Rupert Murdock look reasonable, ethical and unbiased said defendants committed the felony of … ",

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:34 pm

Dumb-assed-ness in the third degree?

And if that ain't a crime, it should be.

widestanceshakedown January 12, 2012 at 1:41 pm

It's gonna be hard IN THERE for a pimp, if you know what I mean.

Here's a possible bright side: he lets his pals take the fall, who later rat him out for stuff we don't even know about yet (wasn't his love boat ploy exposed by an accomplice who apparently got a moral at the last minute?). Then, JO'K gets mandatory minimums of Blah Brother Love daily for years to come.

OneYieldRegular January 12, 2012 at 1:41 pm

Has there ever been a more adolescent adolescent than James O'Keefe? I mean, except for the fact that he's nearly 30 years old?

MozakiBlocks January 12, 2012 at 1:42 pm

To quote that great philosopher Don Henley:

"Somebody going to emergency
Somebody's going to jail"

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:35 pm

To quote that great philosopher Mojo Nixon:

"Don Henley must die!
Don't let him get back with Glenn Frey!"

DaRooster January 12, 2012 at 1:43 pm

“The journalism establishment is not very friendly to me or to our work product, when they’ve been using these tactics for decades.”

Sounds like my 21 year old son… "They are all out to get me, I didn't do anything."

SorosBot January 12, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Not to mention that the journalism establishment is way too friendly to him and his work product, considering how it's treated some of his videos credulously instead of dismissing them out of hand because they're all bullshit.

Loaded_Pants January 12, 2012 at 5:40 pm
smokefillednewyear January 12, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Imma act like a dead person in a state that doesn't require voter id!
Gotcha!

Terry January 12, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Forgetting that it's a SMALL state and someone is bound to know the deceased person.

BS4Dummies January 12, 2012 at 1:45 pm

In the Heirarchy of the Turd Clan, subordinate O Keefe ,working for some Koch sucking funded orgynization, fantasizes in the mens?/ladies? room, while wearing his pimp outfit, of becoming King Turd one day of the Murdoch Empire, while being paid a jinormous salary and mezmerizing his followers in mon oh sill ah bulls, a language that only certain political members can translate. He looks forward to upgrading his pimp outfit, and hanging up his acorns (nuts) for the highest level of sleeze than he can achieve.

Negligently_Joe January 12, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Question: isn't O'Keefe already on Probation for that other stunt that involved committing crimes?

I ask, because it's a very small part of the whole story, but I'm pretty sure crossing state lines to commit a felony is a probation violation? Also, it probably involved lying to his probation officer, since "I'm going to commit felonies in New Hampshire, to prove a point about how felonies are easy to commit" is probably not something that'd get him permission to leave the judicial district.

MissTaken January 12, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Gawd people, you want dead people to be able vote AND not get pissed on? Talk about wanting your cake and eating it, too.

CapnFatback January 12, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Question: What if it's a urinal cake?

MissTaken January 12, 2012 at 1:57 pm

I'm a girl so I had no idea those existed. How did I ever exist before the internet?
http://peepeeface.com/

CapnFatback January 12, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Well, great, thanks for the link. Now I'm gonna hafta root around for the most appropriate picture of James O'Keefe.

And, by the way, you're welcome. My edifying bathroom humor may have saved you from a cruel practical joke at some dude's tea party down the road.

GOPCrusher January 12, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Use your own picture urinal cake kit?
What kind of a sick bastard would put his own picture on a urinal cake?

MissTaken January 12, 2012 at 5:41 pm

James O'Keefe?

Steverino247 January 12, 2012 at 1:53 pm

But did they urinate on the ballots?

Terry January 12, 2012 at 1:54 pm

When are O'Keefe's parents going to intervene and make him get a damn job?

Dudleydidwrong January 12, 2012 at 4:24 pm

The next time they see him–which may be in the next century if they have anything to say about it.

GOPCrusher January 12, 2012 at 5:29 pm

Maybe they are too ashamed to admit they're his parents?

Chet Kincaid January 12, 2012 at 1:55 pm

"James O'Keefe = Bradley Manning. Both sides do it, right Barnicle? Mika, give me another cup of Joe and a handjob under the desk."

user-of-owls January 12, 2012 at 1:56 pm

It's pretty clear that if he somehow skates on this one, it will only be a matter of time before he winds up in the clink. I suspect, for example, that he's got a large cache of video that he's taken of himself cheating on his taxes.

Ok, so see here [holds 1040 up close to the camera], that deduction for 'charitable contributions'? So bogus, dude!

CapnFatback January 12, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Yes, but will the feds ever find it buried in all that footage of auto-erotic asphyxiation?

Loaded_Pants January 12, 2012 at 5:33 pm

I don't know if he's just stupid or a psychopath who doesn't care/realize his actions have consequences.

MrsBiggTime January 12, 2012 at 1:59 pm

That does make sense, because he's truly fugged himself this time.

Beowoof January 12, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Too bad there won't be video of him tossing salad in prison.

prommie January 12, 2012 at 5:29 pm

I prefer jelly.

tessiee January 13, 2012 at 12:37 pm

Now who's being naive?

SorosBot January 12, 2012 at 2:01 pm

So here it is, one actual occurrence of the voter fraud the wingnuts keep rambling about even though it doesn't exist! Committed by them. Nice work, morans.

MARCdMan January 12, 2012 at 2:04 pm

There won't be justice for this tool until he gets hit by a bus.

GOPCrusher January 12, 2012 at 5:30 pm

Why do you hate buses?

BZ1 January 12, 2012 at 2:09 pm

Shove his sorry a**ss into the clinker

Crittocracy January 12, 2012 at 2:12 pm

This is just like that time Hitler killed all those people to raise awareness about the problem of genocide and people didn't get it and persecuted him.

arcadesproject January 12, 2012 at 2:33 pm

I suspect that O'Keefe and friends have permanent laminated stay-out-of-jail cards unlike, say, citizen assemblers in Oakland, NYC and all the other Occupations.

James Michael Curley January 12, 2012 at 2:54 pm

Today about 20 folks from OWS Freedom (Zuccotti) Park go on the sentencing block. Another 50 are scheduled for next week. Since there are still scores of brave souls in the park I hope this revives the movement. Bloomberg's administration has been notorious for heavy sentences to 'quality of life' crimes.

DahBoner January 12, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Republican Voter Fraud seems to be rampant among nasty, entitled Republicans.

See also: Ann Coulter, Mitt Romney, Dick Cheney, etc..

Soylent Green January 12, 2012 at 2:34 pm

I'm Bubba, Cell Block 8. I was getting me some help from that Acorn a ways back, but the funding got stopped. Had to rob a liqour store to pay the bills and got caught. Heard i was getting a new roommate here pretty soon. Hope he wears that pimp outfit.

outragedcitizen January 12, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Now, he might get a chance to do an up close and very personal expose' about prison rape.

iburl January 12, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Does this mean that when they remove the acorn pimp votes that it's possible that Rick Perry's totals will be even lower? I don't think that's mathematically possible.

Thurman Munster IV January 12, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Isn't this fucktard on probation for that shit he pulled down in Louisiana?

CoatHanger January 12, 2012 at 3:28 pm

On May 26th, 2010, O'Keefe pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge over that New Orleans phone tapping thing. He was sentenced to three years probation. Would this not violate that?

Generation[redacted] January 12, 2012 at 4:05 pm

Did he at least vote for Ron Paul?

weejee January 12, 2012 at 4:10 pm

How much fudge can a fudge packer pack, if a fudge packer could pack fudge? Seems Jimbo may find out.

Nostrildamus January 12, 2012 at 4:25 pm

This is being blown completely out of proportion. James O'Keefe is white, people!

Dudleydidwrong January 12, 2012 at 4:27 pm

I wonder how the great New Yawk Timez is going to report this one.

bitchincamaro2 January 12, 2012 at 5:11 pm

P is for prison. P is for putz.

fuflans January 12, 2012 at 5:22 pm

I notice a contempt and a hostility from the media establishment towards us

yes.

ibwilliamsi January 12, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Hold onto your soap, James.

Angry_Marmot January 12, 2012 at 7:22 pm

Does O'Keefe suffer from some kind of Asperger syndrome– lack of empathy, clumsiness, unwillingness to learn the difference between editing skills and deliberate distortion– that hasn't been identified yet? Maybe we should take up a collection to buy him a clue.

rocktonsam January 12, 2012 at 8:22 pm

naw, James' education should be starting soon.

Veritas78 January 12, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Federal probation administrators have no sense of humor whatsoever. This will require only minimal adjudication for him to be incarcerated, quite swiftly, on the earlier conviction, and there will be no bail while he's being tried for these crimes. This was beyond stupid — it's a self-destructive impulse, which will succeed.

ttommyunger January 12, 2012 at 10:21 pm

If Bubba offers you the choice of jelly or syrup when tossing his salad, go with the jelly, James; I hear it masks the smell better. Bon appetite'!

KenLayIsAlive January 12, 2012 at 10:48 pm

I can deal with self-righteous people. I can even deal with liars. But give me a self-righteous liar and you've got a person I simply can't stand.

James O'Keefe is simply one of the most despicable motherfuckers alive. Seriously, someone put this guy away before he does even more evil.

reliefsinn January 13, 2012 at 1:19 am

Agreed. To present the precinct workers as part of a left wing conspiracy, and accuse them of some kind of fraud, when Okeefe and his followers are the ones breaking probably a dozen or more of Federal and State statutes, is about as self-righteous and hypocritical as I can stand.
If Okeefe and his pathetic "sting artists" go do to the hoosegow, they will join a pretty long list of their fellow Republitards: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2007/04/03/318925/-

econey January 13, 2012 at 12:49 am

All he wants is Andrew Breitbart's love? Isn't that what we all want?

prthatrocks January 13, 2012 at 1:17 am

I think it's ironic that this a–hole, James O'Keefe, crawled out from under his rock with yet another asinine stunt only 6 days after Media Matters for America runs an article entitled, "Why Conservatives Can't Do Journalism," which states, in part, and correctly, I might add, "The reason remains simple: Partisan conservatives have routinely shown they have neither an interest in genuine journalism, nor the skills to practice it. Conversely, progressives over the last decade have put in the hard work, held themselves to professional standards of conduct, and have reaped the rewards. So it's no surprise that year after year conservatives moan that progressives have built a new media infrastructure and are outclassing them, especially online." http://mediamatters.org/blog/201201060005

horsedreamer_1 January 13, 2012 at 2:24 am

O'Keefe will be Ali to David Brock's Mohammad.

Allmighty_Manos January 13, 2012 at 10:40 am

Next time I get busted with a pound of coke at the Mexican border, I'm just going to tell the DEA that I'm a journalist and boy and my secret video will show what a good job they are doing.

fitley April 6, 2012 at 5:37 pm

Inmate #1- Hey man I trade you this scawny chicken for some smokes

Inmate #2- All I got is 2 soggy half smoked urinal butts.

Inmate #1- Ok

Inmate #2- Don't forget I got change comin'.

mrblifil September 18, 2012 at 10:05 pm

I'm on a motherfucking dildo boat!

Chillwillard January 12, 2012 at 1:04 pm

Isn't "kicking his own ass" what this narcissist has been doing all along?

Biff January 12, 2012 at 2:49 pm

Pompom girls like W and Perry, you mean?

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: