swooping to new lows

Kansas House Speaker Mike O’Neal took his time quasipologizing for it, but the Republican has finally admitted wrongdoing in forwarding a warm holiday message comparing Michelle Obama to the Grinch by making use of some unfortunate Wind Event that befell Michelle’s hair on some tarmac somewhere. O’Neal apparently “didn’t read” (because he can’t?) the text of the message, which called the First Lady “Mrs. YoMama.”

The e-mail, whose subject read, “Twins separated at birth?” contains the above picture and the message, “I’m sure you’ll join me in wishing Mrs. YoMama a wonderful, long Hawaii Christmas vacation — at our expense, of course.”

O’Neal added, “Sorry, just had to forward this latest holiday message! I’ve had worse hair days but this is pretty funny.” How considerate.

O’Neal first had his communications director Alyson Rodee defend the whole thing. Said she:

Political cartoons are a part of American culture.


Beverly Hills surgeon explains at home fix for crepey skin around the arms, legs, and stomach.

It’s hard to see how Mike O’Neal poking fun at himself and forwarding a lighthearted political cartoon about the first lady’s extravagant spending of taxpayer funds during a time when many Americans are financially struggling is newsworthy.

This is the first time … in a few days that O’Neal has forwarded such an e-mail. According to the Lawrence Journal-World, the paper received another e-mail that O’Neal had “endorsed” that featured a picture of President Obama and a passage from the Bible containing the words, “Let his days be few and brief.” Days in office! Days in office. [Lawrence Journal-World via Politico]

Hell.No. Hats
  • Barb

    "Douchebag, party of one. Your table is now ready.

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      Sadly, the GOP is larger than just one douche bag.

  • Grief_Lessons

    Stink, stank, stunk.

  • Why, I often forward funny things that I don't read! Just the other day, I accidentally posted my blood tests because my phlebologist put a little smiley face sticker on it, and now the world knows I have chlamydia!

    • snoopyfan2010

      That was you???

  • neiltheblaze

    This is, I guess, what passes for humor in a dry state that is wall to wall wheat and corn fields.

  • veritass

    O'Neal added, "Blah people have some nappy fucking hair, amirite?"

  • freakishlywrong

    about the first lady’s extravagant spending of taxpayer funds during a time when many Americans are financially struggling is newsworthy.
    Fuck this shit. Dig up when these asswipes griped about the the many Bush, or any other fucking Republicant Pres and we'll talk. This is so fucking tired.

    • Radiotherapy

      Talk to the teleprompter.

    • CommieLibunatic

      They seem fine, if not enthusiastic, about the F-35 fighter jet program. And that cost about a trillion dollars; a few dozen billion more than the entire GDP of Australia.

  • gullywompr

    May the lightheartedness of the Republican Party fill your holidays with cheer and joy!

  • Not_So_Much

    Doesn't this douchenozzle know that the proper apology is the "if anyone was accidentally offended, then I'm sorry they were offended…" bullshit?

    • tessiee

      That's so 2011. The new hot trend in bullshit non-apologies is that said douchenozzle had deep moral and relgious convictions, blah blah blabbity blah.

  • memzilla

    Mike O'Neal, former editor of the Ron Paul Newsletter.

  • SorosBot

    It reminds me more of There's Something About Mary than the Grinch.

    • Barb

      Franks and beans!

      • OneYieldRegular

        Or as Sylvia Plath put it: turkey neck and gizzards.

        • horsedreamer_1

          Speaking of Plath… You know who else committed death by oven?

      • Biff
  • bumfug

    "I thought they were talkin' 'bout that cello guy!"

    • DahBoner

      The guy with the clock around his neck???

      • tessiee

        No, you nut-head! Thomas Jefferson!

        • ShaveTheWhales

          Or his brother Monte.

  • Tundra Grifter

    That Grinch photo looks to me more like Donald Chump when the wind undid his 'do.

    Or, to be a bit more accurate, Chump's hair don't.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      His hair would have been out of the frame by the time the cameraman clicked; blowing down the sidewalk like a tumblin' tumbleweed.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Can we just take away Kansas' internet access? At least until they figure out what century this is.

  • memzilla

    Next up, a resolution in the Kansas Legislature to rename the town of Liberal, Kansas.

    • not that Dewey

      What, "America-hating Big Government Traitorous PC Feminazi Socialist, KS"?

  • BaldarTFlagass

    "Her hair is pretty near… pretty near her forehead, that is."

    • Biff

      Thing is, this same asshat probably thinks Callista would make an ideal 1st Lady, because she's so translucently Caucasian.

  • Goonemeritus

    I had a girl friend when I was young that rocked a similar hair style to the FLOTUS’s but she used Mop & Glow to hold it in place.

    • tessiee

      Wood glue works, I'm told.

    • Guppy

      I'm suddenly reminded of There's Something About Mary.

  • BigDumbRedDog

    Her hair is actually hiding the fact that she is a unicorn.

  • Political cartoons are a part of American culture

    They know a lot about culture in Topeka, KS.

    • Geminisunmars

      I think it is spelled Kulture, in Klansas.

    • LetUsBray

      Say, is this that "white culture" Glenn Bleck was talking about when he was claiming in that whiny, sniveling voice of his that the prez is racist?

  • HempDogbane

    What's Not the Matter With Kansas?

    • Gleem_McShineys

      Q: What's The Matter With Kansas?

  • Oh, hey, look! A Republican racist! Don't see those too often.

    • snoopyfan2010

      Or white ones at that….those are rare.

  • Golfing_OJ

    "The Speaker has announced he will be retiring to spend more time with his watermelon salesman!"

  • Radiotherapy

    Cracker-ass says what?

  • Limeylizzie

    K-K-K-Kansas , beautiful Kansas , your'e the only K-K-K-Klan that I adore.

    • Barb

      Lizzie, let's send him a thoughtful email.

      • Even weirder? His wiki page lists his address.
        Wait, did I just say that?

        • Limeylizzie

          Wonkette road trip?

          • It would be a delight, because you keep reminding me of all these sing-out-loud tunes I'd half-forgotten. My grandfather used to sing that K-katie song to us.

          • Limeylizzie

            My Grandmother used to sing it to me and I sing it to my stepdaughter, kate, and I think drive her insane!

        • Biff

          Jesus fuck, he and I share a birthday, though he is exactly one year older than I. Thing is, we were both in the Class of '69, so he must be an MR or something…

      • Limeylizzie

        OK I'm with you.

  • It’s hard to see how Mike O’Neal…is newsworthy

    He isn't–except when he is doing something stupid in public. Like now.

    • Like pretty much always, at least here in Baja Nebraska

    • Buckminster

      Maybe he could go to Facebook and take a tutorial on how not to harass someone on the internet.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Maybe Michelle is actually the fourth Stray Cat.

    • Generation[redacted]

      Do you like Flock of Seagulls?

    • tessiee

      Well… She's got cat class and she's got cat style.

    • horsedreamer_1

      Brian Setzer? I just met her!

  • AlterNewt

    I like these unpologies.

    • Buckminster

      Yeah, he's sorry, but not in the way he means it. He's sorry as in, "What a sorry loser."

  • coolhandnuke

    Santorum Vitalis is the hair product of choice in the Kansas Legislature.

  • The First Lady is looking kinda blah today.

  • Blueb4sunrise

    It's 'Yo Blahma' .

  • BaldarTFlagass

    The "forward" button; how does it work?

    • Geminisunmars

      Emails come in, emails go out. You can't explain it.

  • VespulaMaculata

    You've got to hand it to First Ladies, Republican and Democrat. They really must love their husbands to sign on for the abuse they all end up taking.

  • memzilla

    Of GW Shrub's 2,922 days in office, he spent 977 of them on vacation, about 33%.

    Unfortunately, 66% of Americans still get their news from teevee, but the percentage is shrinking. Say what you will about Google, it is making it easier to catch these asshats in their bald-faced lies.

    • tessiee

      However, it's only fair to point out that every day Dumbya was on vacation was one day less that he was molesting the country.

  • elviouslyqueer

    It’s hard to see how Mike O’Neal poking fun at himself and forwarding a lighthearted political cartoon about the first lady’s extravagant spending of taxpayer funds during a time when many Americans are financially struggling is newsworthy.

    Shorter Alyson Rodee: Michelle should act more niggardly about her spending.



    • SorosBot

      What she's saying is that only white people should have nice things like vacations to Hawaii.

      • Chichikovovich

        More precisely – only white people should be able to fly home for Christmas with the family. Evidently his view is that the only proper place for African-Americans is in prison.

        • Geminisunmars

          Well, if he really wanted to be with his family during the holidays he would have gone to Kenya.

    • chicken_thief

      Originally she was going to note her surprise that Hawaiian resorts had Section 8 housing and took food stamps, but edited that part out so as to not offend any Hawaiian resorts.

    • tessiee

      "Shorter Alyson Rodee: Michelle should act more niggardly about her spending."

      Also, if her hair-do is silly, people will be inclined to snigger at her.

  • Generation[redacted]

    I would like to invite the House Speaker to bite into a three decker rat dick and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce.

  • Wonderthing

    "Look Daddy! Every time a douchebag posts a racist email, a demon gets his horns."

    –Zuzu (or PA- Zuzu)

  • OneYieldRegular

    What a cool job that staffer Alyson Rodee has – being trotted out by her racist boss to defend his racism. I'm sure it makes her feel that acquiring that college degree was worth all the trouble.

    • chicken_thief

      Making the apologies isn't nearly as bad as the day she was interviewed and he said, as he pushed her head to his crotch, "well, you want the job, don't you?"

  • nonbeliever7

    Kansas? That's somewhere in Venezuela , right?

    • You betcha! And it has 17 billion residents!

  • widestanceshakedown

    A cheap carpet/drape joke would have been funnier.

  • GregComlish

    Yo Mama so black she could be the First Lady of the United States!

    • Geminisunmars

      Oooooo — slam!

    • Negropolis

      Oh, snap! No you didn't!

  • owhatever

    Stay classy, Kansas.

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    I love how the current Republican excuse de jour is "I didn't read it, even though it went out under my name." It appears to be the "spend more time with the wife and kids" of our age.

    • Geminisunmars

      More dog-whistle for the party base.

  • MissTaken

    I wrote this comment, but I didn't read it.

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      All though my name appears on this comment, I have neither read your comment nor have I read this comment.

      • elviouslyqueer

        This comment has not been read by the user.

        • SorosBot

          This is not a comment.

          • tessiee

            Ceci n'est pas un comment.

    • SorosBot

      I didn't read your comment either, because Wonkette doesn't allow comments.

      • Geminisunmars

        Wha? There are comments?

      • MissTaken

        No one has read (or lost) any

    • El Pinche_v2

      I didn't see what you did there.

    • Guppy

      Wow, I didn't peg you for Ron Paul.

  • Crank_Tango

    Yeah well, Kansas mama so fat…

  • I've got another "YoMama" joke for you , Mike:

    YoMama is so dumb, that she raised her son an ignorant Republican bigot.

  • FakaktaSouth

    What up with the class warfare, bitch? Lavish vacations when people are suffering is. . .what? Not nice because rich people are dicks to not pretend to be poor? I thought this great separation between rich and poor is what pissed these fucktards off? I. Cannot. Keep. Up. IOKIYR, its always wrong if you're Obama. Right. I know. Still, their lack of consistency pisses ME off.

    • Geminisunmars

      Well, you have to admit that they are consistently inconsistent.

    • Naked_Bunny

      I like how we're supposed to be angry at Obama for going to Hawaii instead of being angry at O'Neal for supporting economic policies that prevent us from also being able to go to Hawaii.

  • BlueStateLibel

    That's the first time I've ever seen "culture" and "Kansas" mentioned in the same sentence, or actually ever.

  • As with Party of Teabrains, GOP committee stooges, and Republican tools of yore , Mr. O'Neal attains not-so-special status as one for whom "the clue train passed his station without stopping."

    • Geminisunmars

      What a clever little comma.

  • MissTaken

    On behalf of all women who have had their 'do get jacked up by an errant wind, I say "Fuck you, you racist, sexist fuck".

    Lemme guess, he's fat and bald, right?

  • Obvs Speaker Mike O’Neal had a vicious case of the dyslexia and the posting was about the wife of cellist Yo Yo Ma.

  • In fairness, Grinch and Michelle are both people of color. Also, some people think they both are cartoon characters. (Not me! I loooove Michelle.)

    Nevertheless, this is a fun game!

    "Join me in wishing Shit Romney a wonderful Mormonadon holiday." [picture of Romney and a robot]

    "Celebrate the 25th anniversary of The Handmaid's Tale with Rick Santorum." [picture of woman chained to a bed]

    "SNAP! Let's help Newt Gingrich commemorate 75 years of food assistance in America." [photo of Newt next to a famished third world male, caption: "To Serve Man"]

  • Chichikovovich

    "Mike O’Neal poking fun at himself and forwarding a lighthearted political cartoon about the first lady’s extravagant spending of taxpayer funds…"

    But, but,…. I'm so confused. How could he have known the message was about that if he didn't read it?

    • ShaveTheWhales

      Well, it had a picture of FLOTUS, didn't it? About what else could it lightheartedly have been?

  • mavenmaven

    The entire republican party is santorum.

  • chicken_thief

    Alyson also added that, like The Donald, Mike gets along well with the blahs.

  • El Pinche_v2

    Yeah, Mike O'Neal is a man of cunture..I mean culture. I bet his country club culture doesn't allow nigras and beaners.

  • hilbillyheroine

    Wait till they find ouT Flotus is a heavy smoker who killed her highschool boyfriend. Oh, what? Wrong one?

  • Simon_DeLongo

    Since the Kansas House Speaker's Offices looooooooooves "poking fun" at pictures, get a load of communications director Alyson Rodee:

    And since we're at it, check out the Speaker's daughter:

  • Naked_Bunny

    Ah, yes. How dare Barack return to the state of his birth for Christmas. I'm sure there aren't any Republican Congressmen returning to their birth states on the taxpayer dime, no sirree!

  • Groupshrug

    As a Lawrence, Kansas resident (where the paper that published this story is), I have to say that Kansas is as racist as you think. However, Lawrence is quite an enigma within the state.

    Lawrence is a very Liberal, well educated and artistic community that ends up on many top 10 lists of towns that kick ass for one reason or another. I try to explain to people that Lawrence is to Kansas as New York City is to the United States.

    • finallyhappy

      yeah but we'd still have to go to Kansas. Sorry.

      • Groupshrug

        If you fly into Kansas City International Airport, you're very close to Lawrence and you don't have to drive through the really yokel parts.

    • LetUsBray

      I lived in Lawrence in the early '90s. Is the paper you're referring to the Urinal-World, and is it still to the right of Ivan the Terrible?

    • Negropolis

      I thought that Manhattan was the NYC of Kansas.

      Wait, wha?!

    • Biff

      Kansas is also home to Split Lip Rayfield, and anyone who doesn't know of them, really should.

  • Gleem_McShineys

    To those I have offended, I am sorry. That was not my intent. If I had meant to offend you, I'd have called her a straight up jigaboo! Or maybe a darkie. But never nigger, I can't bring myself to ever say nigger, it is terrible. People should never say nigger. I hated hearing that Dr. Laura saying nigger nigger nigger, it really was awful. But I digress.
    So you see, looking back, I am actually being very classy in the email in question! You should probably thank me, Mrs. Obama!

    Respectfully, (Truly respectfully! Not like how some people treat you people!)
    Mike O'Neal

  • DahBoner

    If going down south means going to Oklahoma, you might live in Kansas

    Then YO MAMA screws knuckledraggers from Kansas.

    Thanks folks, I'll be here all weekend….

  • Troglodeity

    Never forget: Topeka is the place where they've legalized domestic violence. Seriously.

    • Negropolis

      And, it's the home of the Phelps KKKlan.

  • Negropolis

    Y'all are no fun. Don't you get the joke? Don't you see it?! The First Lady is blah! I mean, look at her. OMG, she's so fuckin' BLAH! Oh, just fuck it. Fuck y'all. No; Fuck ALL Y'ALL!

    "Repeal O'Neal" has a nice ring to it; jus' sayin'.

  • ttommyunger

    The sad, overlooked fact is that this asshole is not a moron, he is a racist pandering to his racist constituency. He knows this shit makes him a local hero and feeds red meat to his base. It is no accident that so many racist, evil nut-cases live and thrive in Kansas; it is a fucking breeding ground for ignorance and bigotry. There, I've said it and I'm glad, my apologies to the six or seven normal, intelligent people currently trapped within the unwholesome confines of Kansas.

  • horsedreamer_1

    All Mike O'Neal has is dust in his brain.

  • Buckminster

    This kind of behavior would get you fired from WalMart. Think about it. We expect a higher level of decorum from the guys who stock your cheap Chinese crap store than we expect of our political machines.

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