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They'll call him the phony king of England.

Last seen being led by Orly Taitz in a violent insurrection to try to get Barack Obama’s name removed from the ballot, what are the Republican lawmakers of the state of New Hampshire, or as we will now call it, “the Arizona of the East Coast,” up to these days? Oh, you know, just drafting a fun bill requiring every subsequent bill that addresses “individual rights or liberties” to quote a relevant passage from the Magna Carta as its legal basis. Who’s the most Originalist of all NOW, biyotchez??

The entire text of the bill, via the Concord Monitor:

“All members of the general court proposing bills and resolutions addressing individual rights or liberties shall include a direct quote from the Magna Carta which sets forth the article from which the individual right or liberty is derived,” is the bill’s one sentence.

So let’s see, oh here’s a fun section from the Magna Carta guaranteeing poor slobs a few pennies if the police steal their shit (rich people aren’t allowed to have their shit taken):

[21] No sheriff or bailiff of ours or of anyone else is to take anyone’s horses or carts to make carriage, unless he renders the payment customarily due, namely for a two-horse cart ten pence per day, and for a three-horse cart fourteen pence per day. No demesne cart belonging to any churchman or knight or any other lady (sic) is to be taken by our bailiffs…

Ooooh, and here’s another one, with family law applications!

[34] No-one is to be taken or imprisoned on the appeal of woman for the death of anyone save for the death of that woman’s husband.

True, these rules seem a little out of date, but “little” is sort of relative, right?

“This is a little bit older than the Constitution, but the same thought is there,” [Rep. Lucien Vita] said.

Eh, half a millenium here, half a millenium there, who’s even counting? The point is, this is the most brilliant legislation ever drafted. [Concord Monitor via ThinkProgress]

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