Obama Just Wants to Remind You That He Won Iowa In 2008

The Obama campaign released a web video Tuesday morning as a friendly reminder to America that the President already knows who won the Iowa caucuses -- in 2008, when he was Man of That Distant Year. Looking at pieces of media like this, it's remarkable to think that Obama has the so-huge-it-sounds-fake sum of $99 million in the bank. Where is it all going? So far, it's funding a 4th-grade-level iMovie cut with a terrible rock soundtrack that sounds like the music at the end of America's Next Top Model when the winner is jumping up and down, slapping a hand to each cheek and crying, I WONNNNN .

Mr. President! We know that you give good speech! This is the only thing we know for sure! There is a lot of edited-sounding (but probably at some point genuine) cheer-track hooting and hollering in the video , entitled "Promises Kept," which is essentially snippets of Obama's speech from the night of the Iowa caucus interspersed with people freaking out about all the undeliverably dreamy-sounding promises being made. The second time around, the soundtrack is sounding more like "With Or Without You" by U2. An excerpt of the excerpts:

"You have done what the cynics said we could do...health care...working Americans who deserve it...harnesses the ingenuity...free this nation...tyranny...oil...WOOHOO...troops home."

Odious. Not just in terms of the irony of the thing but in terms of the fact that the Obama campaign could make, like The Hobbit IIwith the amount of money they have. At least on the day of a middling midwestern horse race, make something more entertaining than that race, instead of something awkwardly cheap and rose-tinted. [USA Today]