The greatest future example of Democracy In America, the Donald Trump “reality show” corn-syrup wrestling contest that was to be held on some fundamentalist cable shopping channel, seems in terrible danger of falling apart! When even noted teevee clown Michele Bachmann bows out, you know this could have been the greatest television event ever, because it obviously would’ve ended with the losers being dropped into shark tanks. [NMA.tv]
Tagged
- 2012,
- debates,
- Donald Trump,
- GOP,
- idiots,
- runaway wig,
- taiwan,
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{ 40 comments }
Trump certainly has trained those gerbils well. They sit quietly on his head while not otherwise occupied up his butt.
Wait, good news? On a Monday?
We've been trained to expect crushing Ken-atribes that shred our very souls on a Monday morning. Don't fuck with our training, Junior.
Based purely on hearing him speak I have concluded that his wig must be attached with 10 penny nails.
…or railroad spikes.
"fundamentalist cable shopping channel"
Now that's not an accurate description of ION! It's a fundamentalist NETWORK shopping channel; you can get their bullshit with an antenna, not just by paying over a hundred dollars a month to Comcast (or whoever your local monopoly is).
I can never figure out what that station is up to – on the one hand, the tagline "positively entertaining" sure sounds like Christian crap, but on the other they consistently show stuff that's pretty dark (like Criminal Minds marathons) for the Jesus is my personal lord and savior crowd.
Well both CBS procedurals and fundamentalist Christianity are popular with the over-60 crowd; just look how often they like to demonize youth subcultures, or carry the message that anyone who enjoys non-standard sex will end up raped and murdered.
Eh, Criminal Minds kills lots of good, righteous God fearing types on a regular basis. And supports things like atheism, duplicity and assisted suicide. I think if it contributes anything the right likes it is the idea the world is a fundamentally scary place where anything too terrible has to be because the perpetrator is mentally unbalanced (as opposed to all the guys who come home from church, beat the wife and then shoot her when she goes to the preacher for help – and the preacher too).
Yellow, mescalined and animating is no way to go through life, son.
I hope we're gonnna live-blog this one, Wonkette.
We did our best on our own over the weekend.
*hic*
~
You would think someone as wealthy as Trump could afford a decent hair piece, but what's on his head looks like a Strom Thurmond reject.
I think he doesn't know how hideous that thing is; it's the peril of having nothing but sycophants and yes-men around you.
But isn't that the de rigeur look for politicians, you know, as though the the whole head has been grafted off the rear end of a live buffalo……..?
Traficant's wig looked more like a dead poodle.
I can hardly wait for the end of the show when Trump releases the hounds!
Personally, I think it would be great tv if it were just Trump and The Newt. With Trump just cold hammering Newton with questions about all the ways in which Donald is awesome, with Frothy just having to stand there on the side watching.
Newt is not exactly a stranger to patting his own back for the awesomeness that is Newt. It might be a fun "debate" if those two just battled it out over who is the Mostest Awesomest in the Land. Fundamentally, I think Newt would win….
Helmets!! That is exactly what happened… they all needed helmets years ago! Now I get it…
Taiwan may worry about that hideous rug leaping off his head for his stupid debate, that would be the only reason I'd watch that shit.
Hey, if I was riding on top of Trump's head, and he took me to that debate, I'd probably jump off too.
"It is the dawing of the Age of the Hairy Ass"
Magnificent!
That's so bad my dogs howled. And they can barely read.
This debate is still going on?! Who's gonna be in it? Gary Busey, Omarosa and Carrot Top?
Trump needs to find a hairy snake to make his toupee, the snake fits Trump's personna and character perfectly. And I bet they couldn't slither away too fast.
Trump talking to Trump about Trump was always Trump's vision for the "perfect debate" anyway. Now he just needs to give wrong directions to Newt and cut the cord on Santorum's microphone.
In his mind, this just shows how weak the field is and how America needs for him to get back in the race.
I have no problem with his hair; its that bloated, puffy vapid face that creeps me out. And those fingers, those stubby little fingers! Yuk!
Maybe they could get Diane Sawyer, or whoever it was that did the last one, to babble forever during this one, too. Also. And then we could watch Newt and the Donald seethe with anger over not being able to get in their $.02 worth of how awesome they are.
Not credible. I don't believe that the thing on The Donald's head can move without the force of hurricane level winds.
So, Trump's hair piece has been a computer projection all along?
I have been reading a lot of Lovecraft, H. P. lately and something has been bothering me. I only just made the connection – in some way old H.P. was predicting the future – his shambling, rugose, squamous unnameable horrors are actually the current (R) candidates. Newtie = Tsathhogua, MB = the goat with one thousand young, etc.
Lovecraft's depictions of unfathomable endless horror certainly apply very well to this GOP field.
Michele Bachmann: The Dunwich Whore
Well, with all these Iowa debates, we're certainly on our very own expedition to the Cornfields of Madness.
Herman and Sarah want to see you Don.
Donald Trump " WTF, I said, I wanted sharks! " But Angry sea bass with lasers on they'er heads will do."
Trump's hairpiece can have a 3-way with Ron Paul's eyebrows as a halftime show.
And the end result would be thousands of little "Cousin It" clones babbling endlessly about the gold standard and going bankrupt twice a year. Not a pretty thought.
Trump's debate could use some Orly Taitz.
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