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FEISTY 3:36 pm December 7, 2011
Wall Street Journal Layout Designers Do Not Care For Newt Gingrich
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{ 80 comments }
And the Rick Santorum article was printed next to the KY ad. (Ha, ha — neither of these appear in the WSJ!)
Are you kidding? Tiffany's probably demanded a full page facing Newt's photo. Their message is clear–are you a fat, repulsive lout who would like hummers from tarted-up shallow women? Buy this. It worked for Newt, it'll work for you.
You need to add hydrogen peroxide into your pitch somehow.
And Botox.
It's implied in the "tarted-up" portion. You can't really consider yourself properly tarted-up unless H2O2 has been used sometime in the last 2 months.
So, this definition of "tarted-up"? You haz found it where?
I'm going to regret asking this, aren't I?
It's just one of those things everyone knows. Geesh. You want it in the dictionary???
That was awesome. Edgy D. is clearly a Mad Man…
The headline writers don't like him much either. Lean Machine? HAHAHAHAHAHA!
more like lean, mean grillin' machine, amirite?
They tried fat ass and it didn't cover enough space.
I'm beginning to wonder if there really ISN'T a giant conspiracy against the Republican party and its myrmidons by, I dunno, God and all his little angels, or some supersmart alien race of really nasty snarky critters.
Clearly it was meant to say "Lean Cuisine in Iowa Doesn't Faze Gingrinch"
Newt is way too unpredictable/insane for even the WSJ to risk. Better to just keep Obama in than risk some sort of global Jonestown disaster or nuclear war. Scenarios that involve massive civilian casualties are always bad for the stock market.
Newt is like political Herpes for the GOP .
More like a bad case of crotch rot. It's hard for anyone else to tell you have herpes without taking your pants off (and usually not even then), but you can't miss the rooting around in the underroos of a victim of crotch rot.
… massive American civilian casualties …"
*fixed
The Holiday may be unforgettable, but Newt is sure wishing we'd forget a lot about him…like his first wife, Jackie Battley (who was forced to sign the divorce papers while in the hospital undergoing surgery), was actually his high school geometry teacher….
Good thing Newt is a historian then eh?
History is written by the victors.
And the Hugos.
His geometry teacher would say that history is written by the vectors.
Ha ha ha ha ha…breathe…Ha ha ha ha ha.
Maybe this is Tiffany's way of saying, 'Pay your damn bill, Newt! Those blood diamonds you're giving to your fancy 3rd piece don't come cheap."
Maybe the ad was directed solely at Newt. His expenditures would justify it, and they know that he'll turn to the page with his photo.
FTW!
When it comes to newt, texture is everything.
Does anyone like Newt?! I mean, anyone not on the receiving end of his Tiffany's largess.
Even she may not care much.
Even his wife doesn't like him – thus the huge Tiffany bill.
I have never heard anyone defend him enthusiastically against any of the charges against him in his long and checkered career.
Oooh, a rebus puzzle!
Lesse, the picture on the right is obviously a ring. Hmm . . . on the left . . . "douche"? . . . "pig"? . . . "Pillsbury tumor"? Naw, too complicated. Erm . . .
I got it! The answer is "cockring"! What do I win?
rebus puzzle
Isn't that the name of the head of the RNC?
Oh, clever.
i thought it was Mr. Mxyzptlk.
Err?
I thought it was Rinse Prepuce, or Rice Prevues or something. A little cheesehead fascist prick in any case.
Dinner with Callista?
Silly me — I thought the expression was pearls before swine.
Huh, One Percenters…
Or was it Age before Beauty?
Some campaigns are unforgiveable.
"Diamonds… that'll shut her up."
Wish it would work on him…
It would, but they'd have to be very large and you'd have to stuff them up his arse.
Who?
"Come on in, sweet cheeks…the water's fine."
Wall Street Journal Layout DesignersHumanityDoDoes Not Care For Newt GingrichFixed.
And very well too, if I do say so myself, and I do.
When you want your corruption to last forever: Tiffany & Co.
Hey, look! Newt bought a full page campaign ad in the WSJ!
"Some Holidays Are Unforgettable"
Yeah, like the time the federal government was shut down because of Newtie's temper tantrum…I still remember that one…
Ugly. I'd take Audrey Hepburn any day.
Hell, some us'd take Truman Capote most days.
When I worked as a staff member at the UT Daily Texan newspaper in the early '80s it was my job to place the ads. I always wanted to place the Sheik condom ad over the one for the UT Muslim Students Association but always chickened out. Blessings to the NY Times staff.
It is funny to see "lean" and Gingrich used in the same sentence, too. Those WSJ people have quite the lame sense of humor.
Astonishing since Murdoch owns them.
Coulda been an ad for a marriage counseling/chemotherapy twofer. I can't fucking BELIEVE the GOPsuckers are scraping so hard I gotta hear this much from this asshole again.
Hey, you're back! Where have you been? Nice to see you back, anywho.
Aw. Thank ya. Sometimes I get politically bi-polar – I either cannot get enough or cannot stand to think abt teh stoopidz. It wears me out. If I'm gonna watch people getting fucked all day, I'd rather just watch real porn (or my football team) ya know? But I saw the Frank Luntz thing where he said "I get it" should be the new rethug catchphrase and something vaguely resembling a "fuck y'all" feeling came up and I needed my snark machine again. It's like a comfy brick wall.
Didn't I tell you this was a lovely place?
Where's the ad for "How to leave your wife for dummies"?
"Just slip out the back, Jack…"
"There must be fifty ways …"
You can't make this stuff up…which is sad because it means someone that terrible exists in the real world.
Because Newt knows Diamonds are forever ! But so are Ass monkeys like him !
The Republican Presidential candidates are living proof of how desperately the 1% wants us to re-elect their butt-boy, Barack Obama.
You know I don't care for that fat fuck either.
Oh! Oh! Oh!
That's gotta HURT, Newton Leroy!
Lean, mean, jewelry buying machine!
You can put Diamonds on a pig, but when you look at it; it's still a pig. I'm talking about you, Calista, and that pig-fucking husband of yours. I believe the Tiffany Ad is perfectly placed along side Newt. Most Americans would get along just fine without either of them.
Add those fucking hideous Louis Vuitton and Coach bags to that list. Seriously, rip the fanatical brand cult away from the bag design or the boring cookie-cutter shit Tiffany comes up with, and you just have a pile of extremely ugly designs no one would buy.
Perzackly!
Unless the ad includes a coupon for a $1 million interest free loan to buy all the baubles your third wife could want, I call coinkidink.
Doughy-faced motherfucker.
During the breeding season, adult male Newts develop nuptial pads on the toes to improve their ability to hold onto females during amplexus
And then he takes you downtown and buys you "something nice"…
Science fiction For Oldz.
Maybe I just want you to tell me it's not in the UrbanDictionary.
Reince Priebus can also be returned to his home dimension if you trick him into saying his name backwards.
DC Comics, you mean.
Do Teh Youngz even read these anymore?
Of course they do! Don't fuck with Big Comics–75% of the movies released every year are bullshit science about dudes flying around in their underwear.
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