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80 comments

  1. Come here a minute

    And the Rick Santorum article was printed next to the KY ad. (Ha, ha — neither of these appear in the WSJ!)

  2. edgydrifter

    Are you kidding? Tiffany's probably demanded a full page facing Newt's photo. Their message is clear–are you a fat, repulsive lout who would like hummers from tarted-up shallow women? Buy this. It worked for Newt, it'll work for you.

      1. Geminisunmars

        It's implied in the "tarted-up" portion. You can't really consider yourself properly tarted-up unless H2O2 has been used sometime in the last 2 months.

    1. PalinzADummy

      I'm beginning to wonder if there really ISN'T a giant conspiracy against the Republican party and its myrmidons by, I dunno, God and all his little angels, or some supersmart alien race of really nasty snarky critters.

  3. johnnyzhivago

    Newt is way too unpredictable/insane for even the WSJ to risk. Better to just keep Obama in than risk some sort of global Jonestown disaster or nuclear war. Scenarios that involve massive civilian casualties are always bad for the stock market.

      1. PalinzADummy

        More like a bad case of crotch rot. It's hard for anyone else to tell you have herpes without taking your pants off (and usually not even then), but you can't miss the rooting around in the underroos of a victim of crotch rot.

  4. OCcupied_Surf_Serf

    The Holiday may be unforgettable, but Newt is sure wishing we'd forget a lot about him…like his first wife, Jackie Battley (who was forced to sign the divorce papers while in the hospital undergoing surgery), was actually his high school geometry teacher….

  5. Texan_Bulldog

    Ha ha ha ha ha…breathe…Ha ha ha ha ha.

    Maybe this is Tiffany's way of saying, 'Pay your damn bill, Newt! Those blood diamonds you're giving to your fancy 3rd piece don't come cheap."

  6. CapnFatback

    Oooh, a rebus puzzle!

    Lesse, the picture on the right is obviously a ring. Hmm . . . on the left . . . "douche"? . . . "pig"? . . . "Pillsbury tumor"? Naw, too complicated. Erm . . .

    I got it! The answer is "cockring"! What do I win?

          1. poncho_pilot

            Reince Priebus can also be returned to his home dimension if you trick him into saying his name backwards.

      1. Rotundo_

        I thought it was Rinse Prepuce, or Rice Prevues or something. A little cheesehead fascist prick in any case.

  7. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    Wall Street Journal Layout Designers Humanity Do Does Not Care For Newt Gingrich

    Fixed.

  8. Callyson

    "Some Holidays Are Unforgettable"
    Yeah, like the time the federal government was shut down because of Newtie's temper tantrum…I still remember that one…

  9. chascates

    When I worked as a staff member at the UT Daily Texan newspaper in the early '80s it was my job to place the ads. I always wanted to place the Sheik condom ad over the one for the UT Muslim Students Association but always chickened out. Blessings to the NY Times staff.

  10. BlueStateLibel

    It is funny to see "lean" and Gingrich used in the same sentence, too. Those WSJ people have quite the lame sense of humor.

  11. FakaktaSouth

    Coulda been an ad for a marriage counseling/chemotherapy twofer. I can't fucking BELIEVE the GOPsuckers are scraping so hard I gotta hear this much from this asshole again.

      1. FakaktaSouth

        Aw. Thank ya. Sometimes I get politically bi-polar – I either cannot get enough or cannot stand to think abt teh stoopidz. It wears me out. If I'm gonna watch people getting fucked all day, I'd rather just watch real porn (or my football team) ya know? But I saw the Frank Luntz thing where he said "I get it" should be the new rethug catchphrase and something vaguely resembling a "fuck y'all" feeling came up and I needed my snark machine again. It's like a comfy brick wall.

  12. BarackMyWorld

    You can't make this stuff up…which is sad because it means someone that terrible exists in the real world.

  13. zappadoo76

    The Republican Presidential candidates are living proof of how desperately the 1% wants us to re-elect their butt-boy, Barack Obama.

  14. ttommyunger

    You can put Diamonds on a pig, but when you look at it; it's still a pig. I'm talking about you, Calista, and that pig-fucking husband of yours. I believe the Tiffany Ad is perfectly placed along side Newt. Most Americans would get along just fine without either of them.

    1. Nesnora

      Add those fucking hideous Louis Vuitton and Coach bags to that list. Seriously, rip the fanatical brand cult away from the bag design or the boring cookie-cutter shit Tiffany comes up with, and you just have a pile of extremely ugly designs no one would buy.

  15. comrad_darkness

    Unless the ad includes a coupon for a $1 million interest free loan to buy all the baubles your third wife could want, I call coinkidink.

  16. DahBoner

    During the breeding season, adult male Newts develop nuptial pads on the toes to improve their ability to hold onto females during amplexus

    And then he takes you downtown and buys you "something nice"…

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