Only a genius with an IQ of 500 like Rick Perry could finally fit the puzzle pieces together in what can be called the great Da Vinci Code riddle of our time: why did Barack Obama really want to allow gays to openly serve in the military? So that “our kids can’t openly celebrate Christmas” is Rick Perry’s somewhat counter-intuitive solution to this mystery according to his new campaign ad, but then again, special relativity is sort of counter-intuitive too, isn’t it? Oh, Rick Perry, don’t kid. We all know the reason you figured it out so fast is because you also hate Christmas. Incriminating evidence after the jump!
Hey, did you know we just belatedly discovered that RickPerry.com redirects to RonPaul2012.com? And that RickPerryIsGay.com is as of yet “not occupied?” You learn something new every day! [YouTube/ Photo via Wonkette operative "Mack S."]
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Happy Hollidays? Gay.
Fascism? Christianity!
Texans do love a good queer bashing at his hunting ranch N*ggerhead. Wonder what kind of bleach he uses on his sheets?
The longtime rumor around Austin is that the good-haired guv is actually bisexual. In the current GOP circus all the candidates must be to the far right of even GW Bush so gays, immigrants, unemployed, and non-Christians are openly held to be the downfall of our great nation. We may yet have a 'Cocktober'-type surprise in regards to Perry.
That the self-proclaimed greatest nation on earth is publicly concerned with what consenting adults do in the privacy of their own bedroom shows how far we've slipped from the Beacon of Liberty the world thought we were.
Although I personally could not give a satisfying shit just who he fucks, I would delight to have some HUGE gay sex scandal erupt regarding Gub'nor Dimwitty. Nothing makes me quite so happy as watching these people, who would happily throw all of us queer folk into the pits of hell if they could get away with it, get their comeuppance. Roy Cohn's in store for you, Tex, if you don't fuckin' shape up and fly, uh, right.
You're thinking of the next ranch up the road; F*ggothead.
Actually Rick thinks about F*ggothead a lot.
I'm sure he prefers faggot ass, but whatever.
ya gotta love the YouTube video on *RPerry2012* has only 5000 views but got 89000 'DISLIKES' (and only 2000 'likes' LOL
sweet holy jeebus it looks like 'Merka HATES RPerry2012! USA!USA!USA!
Rick Perry jerks off in a Santa suit.
Jingle Balls.
O Cum, All Ye Faithful…
Eight tiny reindeer, one cup
While Shepherds Watched
Waiting for the man with the ballgag.
That's not a beard.
Christ, who doesn't? I mean, during the season…
Wearing one, or into one?
♫ You better watch out,
You better not cry,
You better not pout,
I'm teling you why,
Santa Claus is coming
♫
Our "religious heritage". What a crock.
Yes, a crock filled with eggnog, that most holly of drinks.
More like our religious hypocratige.
"Hairitage"
I'm fearing of a gay Christmas
Not like the ones I used to know
Where the twinks glisten,
and children are forced to listen
To sounds of gays frolicing in the snow
Rudolph the big gay reindeer
Had a very shiny tool
And if they ever saw it
The size would surely make kids drool
You better not shout
You better not cry
You better not pout
I'm telling you why
Otherwise the gays will kill you.
Well this is refreshing: an article that includes the words "GOP" and "gay" but doesn't include "rent boy" or "wide bathroom stance."
Perry just has to have a closet the size of Oklahomo to hide in all those years..
Or "blackmail" … "wife" … "photos" … "TWO wetsuits"
But you get my drift.
The subtext is still there.
Oh, fuck you, Perry, and all your right-wing, fear-mongering, inbred kind.
Now why would the phrase "can’t openly celebrate" occur to Gov. Perry? Anyone?
You know who else "can't openly celebrate"?
#OccupyRickPerryIsGay!
Oh, and I suppose the three wise men were straight, going to baby showers gifting perfume and such. In gowns, on ponies.
Very star-struck, too.
Well, THAT settles it.
I heard they were all gay-myrrh-ied.
I know, right? And there name was The Three Maggies. Come on.
I can see a MUSICAL!!!!
Hasa Diga Eebowai!
If elected president, Rick Perry will demand don we now our gay apparel to be stricken from Deck the Halls.
Do jodhpurs qualify as gay?
That Kinky Friedman has gotta ruin everything.
#jewswreckedxmas
Thank baby jebbus for the war on 'traditional values.' That pile of made-up immoral veiled bigotry and inequality can't be permanently deleted from this planet fast enough. Fuck you Rick Perry. The end.
Those poor poor little children, forced to hide while celebrating Xmess. No wonder the Xtians are so upset. Their little ones must cower under the tree, which is covered with a drop cloth, as they rip into their measely twenty packages of drek.
Did anybody else read that URL as "RuPaul2012.com?"
TheWalrusisPaul
I would dump Barry for Ru Paul in next year's election.
Every time a bell rings…Rick sucks a cock.
Rick Perry or Rick Santorum?
Probably both.
"All of them, Katie" is appropriate but it would be refering to the cock.
Or vice versa. If he's doin' it right.
Jesus that's worse than Pavlov's dog.
I heartily support this new scientific research program.
The beady little eyes and the stupid accent.
Seems familiar…
*shudder*
(Hasn't anyone told him it's over already?)
Too damn Bushey…
It's not over till the taxpayers match the funds!
You know who else has beady little eyes?
Apparently not. How can you poll below KraZyEyez Bachmann and still think you have a prayer?
Oh, wait, I said "think." My bad.
"Faith made America strong," says Guvnuh Goodhair. Then why haven't you been able to pray up some brains?
Hey, he didn't say HIS faith. God don't listen to Rick Perry!
Now, now, now. Don't you know that God answers all prayers? It's just that sometime the answer is No. Or maybe it's no-you-dumb-fuck.
Mr. Deity? Is that you?
GOP gallops after Gay Grinch.
Other sites that redirect to RonPaul2012.com:
1) "besthobbitfansite.angelfire.com"
2) "krugerrands4gunz.com"
3) "speciousreason.com"
4)trustifariansunite.org
5)fluoridemakesyougay.net
6) grumpygrampa.xxx
"They're fighting over there to make Afghanistan straight…I mean, safe, for heterosexuality. What's the third thing again?"
Ooops.
This ad proves what I've known all along…that Rick Perry always walks around at a 45 degree angle.
There's a definite SLANT to him, isn't there.
How can you say that on Pearl Harbor day?
It's hard to walk upright with a raging boner – that clip was filmed on Brokeback, in the exact spot where Jake and Heath got it on.
Texas is truly an island of misfit boys.
If only it was an island
If only it were Atlantis.
Kirsten:
“'…our kids can’t openly celebrate Christmas' is Rick Perry’s somewhat counter-intuitive solution to this mystery.."
That's some funny, funny stuff right there! WIN !!!
There's a lie on the screengrab. It says ".org" and I don't see the slightest hint that Rick Perry is the least bit organized.
Unless, of course, it just stands for "organ." In which case, never mind…
In Texas circa 2003, "holidays" meant Christmas, Alamo Day and Dale Earnhardt's birthday–and that is ALL. It was only later that the homos and pagans confused everything with their solstice fiestas and Hanukkah and whatnot.
What a load of bullshit- no snark available.
It's either white tie or black tie, dipshit. Doesn't the governor have a social secretary who can protect him from this sort of gaucherie, like advising him not to wear brown cowboy boots with tails?
Btw, bet we see this kid shortly holding his dolly and crying.
Perry's got a point; when my kids came out to me as Christians, I nearly disowned them.
It is just a phase.
You seem to be holding up well. Be brave and remain strong.
My kids were so incredibly happy when I finally broke the wife of the church habit. The only time they plan on going into a church again is for funerals and marriages.
Good on ya! If I've made ONE tiny contribution to humanity, it's ridding all my ex-partners permanently of the habit of resorting to prayer/faith in a deity. Seeing as how well invoking it worked on me, and all.
Thankfully there are now wonderful therapies and treatments available for "curing Christianity:" it's called an education.
Science. It teaches/forces the habit of critical thinking.
They all experiment at that age.
If Pecos Perry ended "Obama's War On Religion," he would more than make up for it with Perry's war on Iran, Syria, Canada . .
Chicago
Oklahoma has to be in there, doesn't it?
If Obama had his way, only gay soldiers would be allowed to celebrate Christmas.
Hey, it seems to work for the British Navy.
Think I'll just go watch The Big Gay Musical now.
The baybee Jeebus really wanted a gay Elmo dolly.
That's hilarious – I could really see them in tri-corner hats too.
The kid looks like Jonah Hill and Jesse Eisenberg gay-married.
Definitely Texas A&M cheerleader material.
Even though they can't openly celebrate, I can usually tell when a kid is a roasting Christmasphile–that is, a little light in their stockings. My Yuledar goes off like Rudolph's red nose.
You see them hanging around in Christmas bars, nursing their egg nogs. It's kind of sad. There was a famous one in NYC in the 70s called "The Red Nose" … everyone in the place was a "little helper," if you know what I mean.
Fuckin' Stocking-Hangers and Nut Crackers, all of them!!
"you don't need to be in the pew every Sunday"
No, you just have to pay lip service to America the Christian Nation to get the fundies to relax. Then you can spend your Sundays in the closet instead…
Also,
YOUR KIDS CAN TOO PRAY IN SCHOOL.
Fuck off.
Not in Massachusetts. I myself was suspended for simply uttering "Sweet Jesus" when my freshman algebra teacher bent over at my desk to help me with a problem, partially exposing her plump, pouting 38Ds. They are seriously down on our Lord there.
"Titty Meat!"
-RIP Patrice
I do not think that counts as an "according to Hoyle" prayer.
That said, LUCK BE A LADY TO-NIGHT!!
Um … I'd venture to say it wasn't the religious sentiment in your words that caused the suspension. Perhaps a little tenting further south? The heat of enthusiasm in your, um ejaculation?
I'm Rick Perry, and if I were still running for President I'd spend my ad time on policy issues. But because I'm now running to be the new Sarah Palin (gimmie cash!); 'gays, gays, gay, liberals, liberals, liberals. This country was founded as a Christian nation so give me money so I can save you from the secret Muslim in the White House'.
"gays, gays, gay, liberals, liberals, liberals."
Why do I picture Robin Williams from The Bird Cage when I read that?
Madonna. Madonna. Madonna.
Rick Perry, lone voice in the wilderness crying out for the 250 million neglected and oppressed American Christians, won't truly be happy until he's forced to drag his cross to Golgotha while being scourged by a couple of muscular half-naked Kenyan socialists. Actually, that would make me kinda happy too.
FAP FAP FAP.
Yaknow?
Where there's a whip, there's a way.
Also: for Christ's sake, there is nothing preventing kids from praying in schools. I know I used to pray before every exam I took.
Idiot.
Is there a fucking kid on the planet who hasn't fucking prayed their ass off as the test papers were being handed out? It's the hypocritical "let us all close our eyes and pretend we're so fucking pious" stuff I can't stand. Damn! Give over with that shit already.
Lord Jeebus, hep me to unnerstand calcooluss
Despite all my rage
I'm a rat in a cage
Walkin' in a Winter Wonderland….
Wait til someone catches Rick Walking 'round in women's underwear.
Do it, pdog. Do it for us all. DO EEEET.
Needz moar pink dildoes!
Kid to Rick: "I learned it from you dad! I learned it FROM YOU!!!!"
Not sure about Rick, but his son sure looks gayer than the Top Gun volleyball scene.
I was just about to say that, but THIS TIME I read the other comments first!
Oops.
I'd like to comment but like most here this afternoon, I am stunned by the sudden, unexpected death of Col. Potter.
96. The good, etc. etc.
The dude was 96 years old. I'm not sure "unexpected" really applies.
But I thought after you got past a certain age, then you were in the clear, and death would leave you alone. Isn't that how it works?
That's the theory I'm working on, with "a certain age" being mine, last year.
I'm pretty sure you're younger than me, so you have a while to go, yet.
I found out when my father died at that age that it really didn't matter. I knew he was going to die. It's not as if anyone gets off this planet alive. But it still left a tremendous empty space in my life.
I just found out that Harry Morgan died today. He will be missed.
Look on the bright side….anyone thick-skulled enough to be suckered in by Perry probably wasn't going to vote for Obama anyways.
But does Perry realize, at this point, that there isn't anyone left who is planning to vote for him? Surely he can't be THAT dense … CAN he?
Every time I watch a clip of Rick Perry, I slide a little more toward LESBIAN on the Kinsey Scale. I don't know if it's because I'm so repulsed by him that the idea of any penis grosses me out, or that his gay is so very flamboyant, it's contagious. All I know is: GAY.
You haven't seen Mitt Romney in a mumu.
The Mittbot will NEVAH engender feelings of Teh Sexxxay in anyone. Except maybe another bot.
This is the first time it ever occurred to me that you could get MORE gay than you were born with.
Interesting theory.
I would like to address his war on Christmas comments to the Pilgrims that outlawed the celebration of said holiday and fined folks for giving each other gifts and making merry. Were the Pilgrims gay too?
Did you see the buckles on their shoes?
beat me to it. lol
"The pilgrims, English separatists that came to America in 1620, were even more orthodox in their Puritan beliefs than Cromwell. As a result, Christmas was not a holiday in early America. From 1659 to 1681, the celebration of Christmas was actually outlawed in Boston. Anyone exhibiting the Christmas spirit was fined five shillings." http://www.thehistoryofchristmas.com/ch/in_americ...
Geeze, Maman, OBVY!
well obviously that's because Pilgrims were a bunch of liberals from Taxassuchet
Come on. They''ve got buckles, everywhere. On the shoes, on the hats, on their belts….
Ever notice how the most raging wingnut homophobes are always eventually caught with a dick in their mouth?
Jusy sayin'.
His 15 minutes is ALMOST up — where's the dick, dammit?
I'm Rick Perry,and I,m one of those Texas Homophobes! I am the straight guy for the Queer eye! Really I don't spend all day dreaming about Hot Gay sex! Really I'm straight !Why won't you believe me ! Me thinks the lady dose protest too much.
Rick Perry's family is probably missing something as grand as Wonkette's William Burroughs Thanksgiving Prayer: David Sedaris' Santaland Diaries and David Rakoff's Christmas Freud, both available here: http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/ep...
And, to forward to your relatives along with the above: http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/the-gop... http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/how-the...
Merry Festivus to all of the best of us!
I would like just one example of a child being forbidden from praying in school or celebrating Christmas. Just one. Should be easy, to hear these whiny assholes go on about it all the time.
I'll wait.
This year, every time I see a kid celebrating Christmas, I'm gonna pepper spray the little fascist.
Be sure to explain to them that you're simply trying to keep America the way the original Pilgrims would have wanted it.
War is Hell.
♪ Later on if you wanna,
we can dress like Madonna
Put on some eye shade and join the parade
Walkin' round' in women's underwear. ♫
Doh! Should have read all the comments before posting a Reader's Digest condensed version above.
Heck, I remember the first time I got expelled, for praying at recess. It was horrible. And the irony was that I was praying for two guys in my class, who had performed fellatio on one another simultaneously, in the school Christmas Pageant the night before.
MIA:
Just goes to show – no good deed goes unpunished.
The son doesn't look anything like Rick. Just sayin'.
Some say Rick Perry is gay. Just sayin'.
Also, too, ten times gayer. Which is pretty fucking difficult, considering that Rick already looks like he strolled out of some SF bathhouse hand in hand with his boyfriend and his pants wrapped around those eyebrows.
Rick's wife didn't happen to be the sports anchor in a small Alaskan town or anything like that, did she?
I ain't watchin' dat shit. No way, no how.
I did, and I don't recommend it.
Gay-bashing: Desperation-move of GOP candidates since… shit, forever.
Of course, it's nice how the aroma of desperation from said desperation move, not unlike fish and housguests, keeps on growing stronger as time goes on.
Mittens is starting the desperate moves too, now. So unappealing.
Almost as nauseating as Newt sucking his own cock over how great he is now that he's in the lead.
Arrogant little shit smirking all over the InterToobz about how he's going to be the nominee ALMOST makes me wish someone else would overtake him — but there's only 26 days left, and who's going to be the next Not-Mittens? Ain't no one left.
Kids should save up their prayers until they are really needed … like in the presence of a priest or a preacher, or in the shower room with a manly man football coach.
Of course Christmas is gay. After all, why else would Santy wear a red suit and jingle bells?
His son looks like Anthony Quayle in that picture.
His son looks like an aspiring pederast in that picture.
That or a young Gilbert Gottfried with a bad dye job.
Even with such a simple message, Rick's stupidity and lack of sincerity shine through like a heavenly beacon shoved up his ass. One that unfortunately has to compete for space with Rick's head.
A new Emily Dickenson is born!
faith may have made america strong, but it's no match for texas wildfires.
Faith made America strong and in parts charred and smokey.
"Faith made America strong…"
Yeah Dickhole… the faith that we had freedom of religion… faith that the government should help its people, not pepper spray them into submission… faith that together (truly) we can do anything.
Not the faith in constantly pitting people against each other in vile, hateful and evil ways. Go away… all of you hate mongering Ass Holes.
Is this assburger still hanging around?
Assburger! I'd forgotten about that.
Oh, god, assburger.
OK, no snark here. "The Save Merry Christmas from the predatory Happy Holidays and Season's Greetings" people do have this much of a point. (Well, they rarely, if ever, make this specific point, but dammit they should.) "Holiday" themed music sucks. Jingle Bells? Jingle Bell Rock? "Frosty the Snowman"? "Let it Snow?" "Baby it's Cold Outside?" (especially "the classic version" by Dean Martin in his most shiver-worthy date-rapist leering voice.) Elevator-calibre soul-crushing life-draining horrors, every last one of them. And you can't escape them. They're everywhere.
Say what you will about the Church of England – they had some first-rate tunes. Give me the classic religious carols, is what I'm saying here, people.
To be fair, even plenty of the good Holiday songs merely mention Christmas in passing, at most, and are largely secular in nature otherwise: White Christmas, O Tannenbaum (or O Christmas-tree, if you're terrible), Greensleeves (which has nothing to do with anything remotely Christmas or Holidays come to think of it), and of course the best holiday/Xmas/Jesusween song of them all, Carol of the Motherfucking Bells.
I'm totally with you on Baby It's Cold Outside being the creepiest, most date-rapey song ever, though.
…with that said, I heart "Carol of the Bells" the most.
Interesting. For me, Christmas meant Midnight Mass, which was actually very beautiful and solemn, with all the kids lining up to light their candles at the shrine of the Madonna and then singing hyms as they circled the church. And the caroling was wonderful, but we sang old-fashioned carols rather like what Negligently_Joe lists in his reply. The secular Xmas music is, indeed, utterly horrible and inescapably so. I don't like the religious sentiments of the carols, but musically, they are very beautiful, and certainly more seasonally appropriate than "Jingle Bells."
It stands to reason that it would be so. For over a thousand years, the best, and sometimes the only, option for a truly talented composer was to express his (always "his", of course) gift within the church. There were other folk musical traditions like the famous troubadours around the 14th century in Provençal, but they didn't have the staying power to have great composers building on other great composers, pushing the musical conceptions deeper. And some wonderful music came out of that.
I'm personally OK with the religious content. I know lots of people who draw sustenance and strength from their Christian beliefs, so I'm content to leave it alone if it will leave me and my loved ones and friends alone. Perhaps this comes from growing up a natural skeptic in the only non-Catholic family in a very devout French Canadian small town. From the outset, Christianity was always "what other people believe", and since I try to avoid jerks as much as I can, most of the Christians I do know are pretty decent people. So I just take it on those terms, as I would Hinduism or Islam, religions more exotic to Western eyes, but also with both rich artistic traditions and darker aspects.
…and in keeping with the apparent tradition of solemnity that Christmas is often espoused to enjoy, helps to distinguish such a beautiful rememberance of the holiday from today's more modern, horror-filled, agenda-driven version.
That is so awful! Madonna has NO place in the celebration of our Lord's birth!!
Not even "Like a Virgin"?
From her classic album, "The Annunciation."
You're horrible, Chet. It must be why I have a major crush on you.
Some of the nicest old "Yule" tunes are Wassail songs which may mention Christ is passing, but are much more about drinking, fellowship and more drinking, for example:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gower_Wassail
Yes, I stand corrected and chastened. I should have made an exception for folk-traditional songs of sufficient quality to be sung and improved 400 years or more. (Especially if they emerge from a culture like that of Wales, in which music plays a central social role.) If radio stations and malls/supermarkets would saturation bomb us with that instead of the tin pan alley muck we hear today, I'd be fully content.—
Mmm, mulled cider. "Tis the season!
Yes! Thanky kindly!
But but but what about Elvis?
Elvis's voice could produce some nice moments even in “Granny got Run Over by a Reindeer” so there's a general exception for him.On the other hand, I remember a woman I knew behind the counter of a drugstore close to my apartment when I was a youngster. Her store had a Christmas song tape that seemed to consist of nothing but Elvis singing “Blue Christmas”. She told me that after ten days of that song, eight hours a day, five or six days a week, she thought she had died and gone to hell.—
Back in my recording studio days, I had a client who dreamed of being an Elvis impersonator. He went by the name "Isaac Elvis". He was Majorcan, with a super-thick accent, didn't look or sound at all like Elvis, but he was willing to pay me $40/hr to strip vocals from Elvis records with a karaoke machine and record his tortured singing in its place for 6 – 8 hours at a time, several times a week. He was paying my rent, so I never complained, always delivered gracious service with a smile. I was able to tolerate this for about 2 years.
Needless to say, the ordeal involved his recording two xmas albums. He barely knew the words to the songs, so we would have to stop and punch in vocals dozens of times per song, hundreds per night. Blue Christmas is seared into my neurons, as if with a branding iron.
My poor, dear friend! (I hate Elvis Presley on GP)
I keep waiting, and waiting, but the arms on that jacket he's always wearing just never become sentient and grow straps and buckles that attach at the back.
I watched the video, but all I heard was desperation.
I would "make love" to his wife… but she would be confused about not wearing the strap on.
Have a Ni**erhead Christmas, motherfucker.
Radio YKWE:
Geez – you don't Karl Rove was behind leaking that little tidbit, do you?
Apparently he was working for Perry once upon a time…
It's true, the gays are "out" all year long, and I only see Christmas stuff from early September until, say, late January. That's what I call being persecuted!
Gays are going to steal Christmas,and start decorating everything with lights,sparkles,flashy wrappers,and singing with dancing ! So how do you Gay up Christmas again?
I would like to think that Perry's downfall was due to his massive idiocy and obvious fascism, but sadly I think he's only failing this bad right now because he said that people that want Mexicans shot and killed on sight are "heartless".
Hey! I just clicked on "rickperry.com" and all the headers were pink! What gives?
I can't wait to hear his comments about Kwanza. That ought to be precious.
So let me get this straight… Every time a gay person joins the military, or does something gay, it's fucking up Christmas for some poor kid somewhere. And so kicking gays out of the military and keeping folks from doing gay stuff will not only fix Christmas, it's also going to bring back the jobs and make it morning in America again.
Makes sense to me. Does it make sense to you?
We need to talk.
I'm out of bud, so no. It doesn't make a fucking lick of sense to me.
Every time a gay gets special rights in a foreign country, Baby Jesus gets colicky, also.
That god dood don't seem to like these fucking evangelistas much, does he?
Vote Rick Perry President … of J. Crew!
KBJ, I hate to contradict a charming lady like yourself, but I suspect if Rick Motherfuckin' Perry had an IQ of 50, he'd be lucky.
Everyone has their beliefs. I believe Rick is a moron, but at least you know by his rough-cut attire that he's straight, right? Right? The son, notsomuch.
Even if Rick Perry never laid a finger on another man in his life, he is not straight. At best, he's a gay individual. More likely, he's just a sick and twisted little bastid.
Well, in fact, my intent re. his attire was sarcasm. He makes a superhuman effort to butch himself up on camera.
I got that. He just fills me full of piss and vinegar, it has to come out somewhere.
Relax, he ain't worth it.
Rick certainly isn't afraid to use his religion as a stage prop. I think that's a sin (see Mark 6:6 for details). War on religion, no prayer, no Christmas but gays! You can prayer in school all you want but you can't, as school employee, lead prayers. Obvious lie that right-wingers have been pushing for years.
So much bullshit in just 30 seconds. Impressive.
At some point, he will have to expand his appeal beyond the Westboro Baptists.
The Youtube video currently sits at 1400 likes, 60,000 dislikes.
The comments on his channel are pretty entertaining.
http://www.youtube.com/user/RPerry2012
I went through about 15 pages, at least, and I don't think I saw more than ONE that wasn't rude and insulting to Perry. The gist of all the comments can be summed up as: You SUCK, Rick Perry. Go FUCK yourself and go away and never again darken our towels!
And "Americans would rather fuck a blender than have you as President."
I spent a good part of yesterday evening reading the comments aloud as foreplay. Yes, we DO have kinky sex in this household.
Though, to be fair, there are enough Westboro Baptists to win the entire state of Kansas.
Actually, if you have a measurable IQ, special relativity is intuitive. Its general relativity that's the buzz kill.
He can film as many obsessing-about-the-gays TV spots and issue as many Gay-phobic foreign policy pronouncements as he wants, but there is no scrubbing the Paul Lynde off his reputation after that "speech" in New Hampshire.
Paul Lynde had wit and charm. Rick has an "Ooops."
This dude is on fire more than a Bananas Foster, I'll tell you what.
Marcus Bachmann hurt his wrist watching this video over and over.
Video currently has 5,500 views, 2,000 some likes, 90,000 dislikes.
This reminds me to ask this question: Does it not count as a view if the person doesn't watch to the end? Or does the view count just have long update lag times?
Did it leave any evidence, Chet?
Nothing ruins Christmas for the kids like taking away their faggot punching bags.
I so badly want this guy to take a long walk off a short Rasmussen poll.
They have got to realize this unveiled gay bashing has increasingly diminishing returns? We are quite literally at the point, nationally, where candidates might actually start paying for this bullshit instead of earning political capital if polls from this year are right about the issue.
Anyone want to speculate on the cloud of cologne reek that surrounds this guy?
I think you meant colon reek.
Show me on this Bible where Science touched you…
Rick Perry is a charicature of himself.
American Christians. The mainstream, dominant, overwhelming majority that has convinced themselves they're a persecuted minority.
I'm Rick Perry, and I approved this message. And for that reason alone, I should not be allowed anywhere within ten berjillion fucking miles of the White House, ever.
I'll drink to that. (Picks up teacup)
His hair would look better with glitter in it.
…or Santorum
He's still running?
Rick Perry is a massive douchebag. Also.
Hey Wonketteers! Who's this new cunt on the block accusing us of swearing?
Well, Maudit 'ostie Tabarnak de chalis to you too.
Stick with me kid… I'll take you places.
(Oh, and…Fuck 'em… Bitches!)
"MIkey! I want you to stop that goddamn cussin'. It's shit!"
-actual quote from a mother in my neighborhood when I were a lad
Well, fuck me blind! You don't fucking say?
Unfuckingbelievable, innit, the way that shit just seeps into your fucking language alla time.
I think Rick would just remove his teeth for a gay Christian GI. A buff one, that is.
Oh, ya, to keep the theme…. the fucking cocksucker.
Then He smiled at me, pa rump pump pump pump
rump pump pump pump, rump pump pump pump
Me and my bum.
Have yourself a Marcus Bachman Chistmas…
Make the Yuletide gay..
pick up the phone and rent boys will be on the way…
True. But it does keep my mind off all the surgery that seems to be happening around me.
Thanks, and you have a Mighty Toasty Tabernacle of Chablis as well!
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