LIVEBLOGGING THE TURKEYS  8:14 pm November 22, 2011

Liveblogging the GOP Dingbats Debating This Mysterious World

by Ken Layne

We're so thankful this thing will be over in an hour or so.It’s time for the least-informed people in America to debate the whole world, or something! Welcome, happy thanksgiving! We finally have the CNN livefeed working, and now it’s time to painstakingly document the Brutal Idiocy we are about to be subjected to, for America.

8:10 PM — Did they really waste 12 minutes of this debate with intros and commercials and candidate statements? Well done, CNN! We have already been spared a full 12 minutes of dingbat nonsense.
8:11 PM — Mitt Romney wants us to know that Mitt Romney is “also my first name.” Noted.
8:14 PM — Michele Bachmann gasps/farts when Ron Paul says he’s against the Patriot Act. Doesn’t Ron Paul know that Michele Bachmann’s parents were in the Navy or whatever?
8:16 PM — One of these debates, they’re just going to pepper spray Ron Paul for all his talk of “liberty” and “Bill of Rights.”
8:17 PM — Newt Gingrich is going to use the Patriot Act on Timothy McVeigh. That will show Ron Paul! (Are they doing the alternate history game again?)
8:17 PM — Who will applaud wife beating and child abuse in the home? Ron Paul just confused the hell out of these people … a few clap, confused.
8:18 PM — Michele Bachmann, do you agree with the opposing views of Newt Gingrich or Ron Paul? “I agree with the American people. Technology is totally different.”
8:19 PM — Also, uhh … Barack Obama has given the CIA to the ACLU? “We don’t read them their rights.”
8:19 PM — Now Jon Huntsman is going to be all “sane” and “I lived overseas.” Whatever, Barack Obama Jr.!
8:20 PM — “I see Tom Ridge here, a great former secretary of Homeland Security.” HAHAHAHAH.
8:21 PM — Huntsman notes that “America has a brand name around the world.” Sure does! In Egypt right now, they’re using it to validate the vicious police and army action against tens of thousands of peaceful protesters.
8:21 PM — Mitt’s serious, empty voice immediately makes all people sleep. He says word, such as “crime,” and “war,” and “terror,” and “war,” and “tools,” and “war,” and “property.” Mostly “property.” Then he reads some laws, out loud, as bedtime stories for Earth.
8:22 PM — Mitt Romney just took a full minute to say … nothing?
8:22 PM — Rick Perry knows what to do about terrorism: “I would privatize the TSA and get rid of those unions.”
8:23 PM — It’s going to be fun to watch all these motherfuckers hanged.
8:24 PM — Who will Rick Santorum personally torture? “I think Muslims will be someone we’ll look at.”
8:25 PM — Ron Paul: “What if they look like Timothy McVeigh?” Tim McVeigh is cool again!
8:26 PM — Oh boy, now Doktor Paul is talking about how the U.S. is now assassinating American citizens around the world. Quick, Wolf-face, toss it to Herman Cain so we can get some weird nonsense to change the subject.
8:26 PM — Herman Cain will privatize the Patriot Act. But do not throw out the baby with the bathwater! The terrorists, who don’t exist, are going to KILL ALL OF US. Herman Cain will KILL THEM FIRST … or identify them.
8:27 PM — Oh my, “No Blitz …” then he talks a while, and says, “Sorry Blitz, Wolf.” Good god this is like having Homestar Runner at a presidential debate.
8:28 PM — The witch scarecrow cackles, Wolf makes a funny. (He did not.)
8:29 PM — “It’s a haven for bad behavior.” Jon Huntsman, apparently talking about Afghanistan.
8:30 PM — Nothing is quite as funny/terrifying as hearing Wolf “Blitz” say, “Congressman Bachmann, you are a member of the foreign intelligence committee.”
8:31 PM — Bachmann catches herself jabbering about some totally different subject, and replies to her other personality, “No, this is a dual answer.” She just interrupted herself to tell herself that she was giving a “dual answer” by talking about a different country.
8:32 PM — The split screen of Perry and Bachmann is horrifying. She looks like she is watching, in her mind, zombies crawl out of the corpse of a zebra who just ate Jesus.
8:33 PM — Haha, Michele is calling Rick Perry “naive.” This is like toddlers arguing over a clump of mud.
8:34 PM — Rick Perry thinks he can solve the Pakistan-Afghanistan septic tank with a “trade zone.”
8:35 PM — Asked about America spending TWO BILLION DOLLARS A WEEK on the failed occupation of Afghanistan, Mitt Romney …. snore, sorry, we fell asleep again. Now we’re back? Mitt Romney is talking about “Indonesia.” Does he mean Vietnam?
8:36 PM — Jon Huntsman is trying to be “honest” and have a “smart conversation” and wants to be rational, etc. Wrong party, Jon!
8:37 PM — Mitt Romney trying to channel … Reagan? Somebody he saw on CSI? … starts barking like the assistant principal at Huntsman. Huntsman’s all, “Did you hear what I said?”
8:38 PM — Mitt Romney’s reasons to stay in Afghanistan is that we’ve been there for a long time, and spent a lot of money there. Excellent reasoning, Mittens.
8:39 PM — Huntsman reminds Romney that the president is the commander in chief, not some general somewhere (many of which have been fired, in Afghanistan, by the commander in chief). Romney is such an empty suit, he redefines that entire cliche.
8:39 PM — Oh dear Allah, did Romney really say “cut and run”? He did, he did.
8:40 PM — Whining feedbag baby Newt Gingrich is whining about how nobody will let him talk, now he’s whining about people not debating what Newtie wants to debate, and now he’s bitching and whining about whether or not his answer is 30 seconds or not. He is a petulant little bitch.
8:43 PM — Fetus-fetishist Rick Santorum wants us to know the terrorist-Muslims in his mind will NEVER GIVE UP, and they will never die, for they are Immortal, like Jesusween, and that’s why we can never have “timelines” or “end wars” because the Immortals will be Waiting, Waiting, forever, forever, to … blow some shit up in Iraq and Afghanistan, like they do all the time. COMMERCIAL BREAK NOW WE ARE OPENING A BOTTLE OF WINE DAMMIT WE WERE NOT GOING TO DRINK TONIGHT/THIS WEEK BUT GAH!
8:48 PM — Nobody in this audience wants to ask anyone a question. Nobody. Intolerable silence, dead air.
8:48 PM — Finally, a Heritage Foundation clown — Heritage is hosting this debate — gets his important question which is the only foreign policy question ever asked by the Heritage Foundation: “When Israel attacks Iran ….”
8:49 PM — Herman Cain is not sure if he would support it, because there are mountains in Iran.
8:49 PM — Ron Paul isn’t going to do it, and not just because he wants Israel’s military to go fuck itself. He is against it because MOSSAD told him they aren’t going to do such a thing, because they think it is dumb. Ron Paul doesn’t want any part of it, let them bomb what they want, let them “suffer the consequences.” Ron Paul says it’s none of his business, Israel has 200 or 300 nuclear missiles, don’t send our kids to Israel!” (What about our Young Jews who like to visit Israel, Ron?)
8:51 PM — Big cheers from the Paultards, wearing their V masks.
8:51 PM — Herman Cain would like to re-state that he has learned there are mountains somewhere in Iran.
8:54 PM — Rick Perry pronounces it “shanctions.” That’s his “squirmish.”
8:55 PM — Michele Bachmann suddenly is for “energy independence,” even though she (and the whole GOP) has done very little lately but bitch about renewable-energy companies getting the usual Washington corporate welfare.
8:56 PM — Why hasn’t Barack Obama nuked Iran? “He changed the course of history.” Uhm.
8:57 PM — Paul Wolfowitz! #OWS should march in right now and duct-tape this motherfucker to a post, take it outside and douse him with pepper spray. (And then do the same to everyone else in this auditorium, on stage and in the audience.)
8:59 PM — Wolf Blitzer is now slowly repeating the questions to Herman Cain, because Herman Cain never has any fucking clue what the question is. This is like having your senile Grandpa at the Thanksgiving Table keep answering any conversational topic with a story about when he visited the 1902 World’s Fair.
9:00 PM — Mitt Romney, finally getting a chance to talk about the military budget, brings up his own invention, “Obamacare.”
9:01 PM — Haha, Ron Paul: “Well, they’re not cutting anything out of anything, believe me. There’s nothing cut from the military. The people on the Hill are hysterical because the budget isn’t going up as fast as they expect it to.” Cheers from the Paultards. Mittens recites some numbers from his robot chip, says “the list goes on,” immediate silence as everyone falls asleep again.
9:03 PM — Mitt has lost everyone, and finally realizes it, so he throws out the old, “And when I’m president, I’m going straight to Israel.” It’s the wingnut version of “I’m going to Disneyland.”
9:06 PM — Oh boy, here comes Professor Huntsman with his “facts” and “trust” and “figures” and all that. Jon, you have been reasonable enough that the #OWS ReLOVEution maybe won’t hang you by your feet, naked, and douse you with pepper spray for fifty weeks. (This will be the fate of everyone else here.)
9:08 PM — “Blitz” kindly lets Doofus Perry have a go at some utterly confusing budget point. Perry: “I don’t think it is any surprise that a super committee failed. It was a super failure.” GOD, FUCK YOU, YOU ARE SO DUMB YOU MAKE REPUBLICANS LOOK SEMI-SMART.
9:10 PM — Uhm, why is Rick Perry talking about Leon Panetta?
9:11 PM — Haha, when Wolf “Blitz” was covering Reagan, your editor was editing Wolf Blitzer’s poorly typed dispatches which he self-syndicated to various Jewish papers, including the San Diego Jewish Times, where your current editor was once the copy editor. True!
9:12 PM — Rick Santorum “compromised on some child care,” which would seem to be a pretty big sin to Rick Santorum. “Blitz” cuts him off, says “Let’s stay on the question.”
9:13 PM — Nothing makes your Editor happier than knowing this whole corrupt nation is going to be broken down, taken apart, and handed back to the people who live here.
9:14 PM — What’s up, fat whining candy baby piglet? Newt is America’s worst public figure, and that is saying A LOT.
9:15 PM — Michele is going to “draw a line in the sand,” and she wants us to “consider the context,” and now she is reciting debt figures, and adding other potential debt figures, and … could we please get a Thank You to George W. Bush for all this? Have you people all forgotten George W. Bush, America’s favorite most-recent Republican two-term president? Michele, you used to lust for Bush Junior. Your loins ached for him. Look:

Stick that thing all the way in.

'Oh Mister President, I got some Death Fangs all for you now.'

9:19 PM — Wolf Blitzer notes that Egypt is having a Second Revolution, although he leaves out the part about how the MILITARY is smashing skulls because they think it’s “all right” because that’s what American Cops are doing to the peaceful American protesters. More wine, Please?
9:23 PM — Everyone, please twat some reasonable-sounding/totally insane question for the candidates by using this Twitter “hash tag,” #CNNPostgame
9:24 PM — Rick Perry is going to stop drugs by … uh, Hugo Chavez, Hezbollah, Iran, Mexico, Paramount, etc. Dipshit.
9:25 PM — Rick Perry is going to make sure the Texas-Mexico border is “shut down” when he is president. Isn’t he governor of Texas right now?
9:26 PM — YES, Ron Paul says we can have our marijuana that grows like a weed all over America. PRESCRIPTION DRUGS kill so many people, BOOZE is a health-wrecking demon, oh dear god Ron Paul is completely, totally right.
9:27 PM — Herman Cain will now jabber some random nonsense about … eh, who knows.
9:28 PM — “Let’s solve the whole problem,” says Herman Cain. Hard to argue ….
9:29 PM — Some AEI dork is going to ask a fancy question, about letting people with “the education” come to America so we can build a Better Facebook, to kill everyone’s soul.
9:33 PM — Michele Bachmann is now invoking Steve Jobs. Does she know he was a SECRET ARAB?
9:35 PM — Bachmann’s second handful of pills is kicking in now … Newt will let anyone do ANYTHING as long as they’re part of the church he recently joined, with his third mistress.
9:35 PM — It’s way past Mittens’ bedtime, but he’s ready to staple green cards to report cards, if that’s the hard work he has to do. “This is a party,” he says. “This is a party.” No-one knows what he means. Mitt has never partied.
9:37 PM — Mitt is ready to bring all the people to America, if they have the educations, so we can “compete globally.” Newt, however, will deport you if you are not part of his Whore Church (Tiffany).
9:40 PM — Elderly crowd now fully asleep, livebloggers near death, not even Wine & Marijuana & Irish Breakfast Tea can save us now.
9:45 PM — Some neocon with a shitty beard is talking about Syria. Wolf Blitzer immediately says, “Herman Cain, you may not know this …..”
9:47 PM — Haha, now the “Arab Spring” is a bad thing, according to Republican Primary Voters, because oh boy, people are trying to take their lives back from the military-corporate state, and now even Jon Huntsman, the closest thing to a non-idiot in this auditorium, is rattling off nonsense about the Ottoman Empire, Israel, whatever, shut up.
9:49 PM — Wooden power-suit Conservative Think Tank Youth Gal with her hair pulled back so hard it makes her eyes into giant pools of fearmongering foolishness, she has a question. It is about … Israel, Al Qaeda, something. She has never enjoyed a true orgasm.
9:51 PM — Uncle Ron Paul getting tired, weird. “Why don’t we mind our own business?” Agreed, fine, whatever.
9:52 PM — Mitt Romney does NOT believe that “we have people around the world with common interests.” IN fact, Romney believes Jesus lived here in America, with the Indians. And then the Europeans killed all the Indians.
9:52 PM — Blitz: “Just to be clear, what the fuck are you talking about you tube of Brylcreem?”
9:53 PM — Mitt knows that tanks are not aircraft.
9:53 PM — Rick Perry is not sure if tanks are aircraft, but we should be “serious about saving Israel, right now.”
9:54 PM — Last Question, from some AEI factotum: What secret unmentioned thing is going to DESTROY YOU ALL? They don’t take the bait. They don’t know. They can’t see. It’s coming. It is coming for them. They are Yesterday’s Meat.
9:56 PM — Rick Perry thinks China is communist. God he is so dumb, his children must shit in his shoes each day just to watch him not know he’s sticking his feet into shit again.
9:57 PM — Herman Cain wants to talk about computer games.
9:57 PM — Sad sack candy-pants diaper adulterer Newt Gingrich has an Eeyore list of computer things he is not worried about, based on the DEAD TONE OF HIS VOICE.
9:58 PM — Michele Bachmann is … eh, a fucking idiot. PUT HER IN THE LANDFILL, let’s stop listening to these jabbering fools and dangerous kleptocrats. PUT THEM IN THE FOREVER DUNGEON, take back your lives, stop following politics, let us MAKE politics, okay, good night, time for your editor on the West Coast to finish dinner for his Hungry Children, fuck the GOP, death to America, may America rise up and become a Land of the Free, the end.

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 579 comments }

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 8:14 pm

I'm already sick of Wolf Blitzer.

GhostBuggy November 22, 2011 at 8:16 pm

"The goverrrrnerrrrr of Texxxxassss, Rrrrrrick Perrrry!" What the fuck was up with that?

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:20 pm

They shoulda got that "Let's Get Ready to Ruuuuuuummmmmmmmble" guy.

Dok-cupy Everything November 23, 2011 at 9:21 am

The box is locked, the lights are on, it's robot fightin' time!

Chillwaver November 22, 2011 at 8:24 pm

Dullest motherfucker in the room (after Mittens, of course).

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:51 pm

And Pawlenty. What, he's out of it? Who knew?

Chillwaver November 22, 2011 at 9:11 pm

Who? (though he apparently made a comeback in the Blingee above)

OccupytheDashboard November 22, 2011 at 8:24 pm

The minute I heard the name "Wolf Blitzer" I thought it was a joke. The next minute I was tired of him.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:52 pm

Who here remembers the term "Scud Stud"?

OccupytheDashboard November 22, 2011 at 9:05 pm

1. First hearing – "Is this a joke?"
2. Second hearing – "I am so done with the fool"
3. Third hearing – "Scud stud"? I just threw up in my mouth.

glamourdammerung November 23, 2011 at 1:12 am

Yes, and I knew the guy's name without having to even use the Google machine.

undeterredbyreality November 22, 2011 at 9:13 pm

Yup. Wasn't that Iraq War I? Before (or at the inception of) 24 hour "news" coverage (when there was actually news being covered)?

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:15 pm

Wolfie wasn't the scud stud, though. (Don't remember who was. Will not google.)

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 1:49 am

I made the mistake of Googling that one. Not so hot–America must have been desperate back then.

Geminisunmars November 23, 2011 at 1:07 am

Ah, dreamy Arthur Kent. Wouldn't you know he is Canadian. And not afraid to take on the big boys (having sued NBC and some others). I was so disappointed when Iraq War II wasn't hosted by him.

Pat_Pending November 23, 2011 at 2:36 am

I'd prefer Arthur Dent.

Pat_Pending November 23, 2011 at 2:35 am

ya know who I really miss? Flip Spiceland.

Biff November 22, 2011 at 8:48 pm

I wish I knew what office he was running for so I could vote against him.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:05 am

His vocal inflections when introducing the clowns are awful. Did not think it was possible, but he is getting even worse than usual…

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:09 am

Also–ten minutes in and he is *still* doing all the talking? Shut up, Wolfie!

DaRooster November 23, 2011 at 9:04 am

I was sick of him in 91.

PalinzADummy November 23, 2011 at 5:55 pm

Jesus, I was sick of that manicured beard-hanger the first time I heard his wispy voice issue from a mouthhole lost in a sea of gray facefuzz.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:15 pm

Newt: The Patriot Act was a good start, but brown people are still entirely too free to move around the country.

valgal2342 November 22, 2011 at 8:16 pm

Frick the Rep whack-a-doodle-debate…..college basketball is on!
Turkey Blingee is great though….

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:21 pm

+ One for the fine, fine Blingee.

The more he talks, the less likable Huntsville becomes.

riffin1 November 22, 2011 at 8:16 pm

Willard started by not knowing his first name.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:16 pm

DRINK!

And FUCK the SPYING ON AMERICANS WITH NO WARRANT Act.
~

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:17 pm

Bloody hell, another debate? My husband's head is ready to explode 3 minutes into this charade

nounverb911 November 22, 2011 at 8:17 pm

Hi I'm Rick Santorum, I can't follow simple instructions and I'm a real frothy dude.

comrad_darkness November 22, 2011 at 8:17 pm

Are they twice as stupid this election round or is my tolerance half?

teatarded2012 November 23, 2011 at 11:58 am

your tolerance is definitely half but they are indeed twice as stupid also, too.

not that Dewey November 23, 2011 at 12:06 pm

Thus making it 4x as annoying.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:17 pm

This is my first liveblog Repub debate. I don't know if I want to do this.

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

We'll go easy on you, Baldar.

Limeylizzie November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

We'll be here for you, baby.

Barb November 22, 2011 at 8:24 pm

Run Forrest! RUN!

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 8:25 pm

You always remember your first.

You poor bastard.

Pragmatist2 November 22, 2011 at 8:26 pm

Here's a hint — you don't.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 8:39 pm

I'm pretty sure you will want to shower in scalding water for about an hour when this is over.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:33 pm

I'm pretty sure you will want to shower in scalding pepper spray for an hour when this is over. I t could only be an improvement.

ThundercatHo November 22, 2011 at 8:48 pm

Have some wine coolers.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:49 pm

Too slow. Straight to the 151.

orygoon November 22, 2011 at 9:09 pm

It's the only way to do this.

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:06 pm

I'm here with the lube! What, did I miss it?

Goddamn.

BarackMyWorld November 22, 2011 at 8:17 pm

I don"t think I can bare to watch this tonight. That Don Young video already filled my stupid quota for the day.

Pres.Libunatic November 22, 2011 at 8:17 pm

Needz moar Tiffany revolving charge accountz.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:17 pm

Timothy McVeigh came from my hometown. I guess I must be a suspect.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:28 pm

Went to my junior high too

OneDollarJuana November 23, 2011 at 10:22 am

You're posting to Wonkette, that makes makes you a terrrist threat.

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 1:25 pm

DId they rename your junior high after him?

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:18 pm

What the fuck? They are all dissing the Patriot Act?

Franknflower November 22, 2011 at 8:24 pm

It's Obama's Patriot Act, thank you very much.

nounverb911 November 22, 2011 at 8:18 pm

Show of hands, how many of you want to bomb the shit out of Iran the first chance you get?

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 8:25 pm

Wait! I called that last thread! Stop! Thief!

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:36 pm

I'm working on getting the shit bombed out of myself right now. Bottoms up! *looking around to make sure Marcus isn't nearby*

natoslug November 22, 2011 at 11:22 pm

Can't we compromise and just bomb the shit out of the midwest? And Texas?

BruceMcBruce November 22, 2011 at 8:18 pm

But Mitt's first name is Willard!

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:19 pm

One-L:
CIA can't interrogate !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:23 pm

"Outsourced to ACLU." Big win! Untrue, but who gives a fuck!

Chet Kincaid November 22, 2011 at 9:57 pm

Bachmann hurled herself into my consciousness on the strength of her unshakeable belief in nonsense, sitting on my TV insisting there were death panels in the big Obama binder she had never read. Her little mind is a discotheque for hobgoblins.

James Michael Curley November 23, 2011 at 10:16 am

Oh! There's a penguin on the Telly!

Chet Kincaid November 23, 2011 at 1:36 pm

A penguin believes in more things that are true than she does.

RadiosTyrone November 22, 2011 at 8:19 pm

LET THE TURKEY FEST BEGIN!!1!

emmelemm November 22, 2011 at 8:28 pm

Gobble gobble!

Nostrildamus November 23, 2011 at 1:55 pm

Stick a fork in 'em.
Then maybe a turkey baster.
And then bring out the electric knife.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:19 pm

No rights for you! I think you might be a terrorist!!

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:20 pm

Huntsman cites Tom Ridge.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:20 am

"We have a name brand in this world."
I know, that wasn't Ridge, but all I can think of now is how Huntsman will protect our nation's trademark, I mean name…

Lionel[redacted]Esq November 22, 2011 at 8:20 pm

Has Herman Cain announced his 999 foreign policy plan? Each company either gets $9 million in foreign aid, $9 million in sanctions, or will be bombed 9 times in the first year of his administration.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:20 pm

Bad people do not have rights.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:11 pm

Just guess who they are!

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:20 pm

Oh Jon Huntsman, Please just say you agree with Ron Paul so it doesn't seem crazy

FrenchTwist40 November 22, 2011 at 8:20 pm

I don't know how long I can bear this. I already want to take heroin and cut myself just to make the hurting stop.

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 8:20 pm

Wolf: "I'm gonna give everyone a chance to respond, but first, let me ask an unrelated question."

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:38 pm

Damn, I glad it wasn't just me seeing that. I finally gave up on watching the debate after about the sixth time Volfie did that. Will someone please pull the Wolfman mask off and expose zombie Reagan?

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 9:45 pm

Seriously! He even just said, "I have a lot more to ask, but first, let's take a break." And then we get back from commercial and he goes straight to a question from the audience.

DaRooster November 23, 2011 at 9:21 am

I guess there is Contact Stupid too…

undeterredbyreality November 22, 2011 at 8:21 pm

Is that Pocahontas leaving a steaming pile for them in the Blingee there?

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 8:21 pm

Mitt looks extra slimey toight

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Limeylizzie November 22, 2011 at 8:24 pm

And Ricky looks extra frothy and fecally.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:39 pm

How are we going to low the price of gasoline if he takes all the tar sand oil and slathers it in his hair?

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:21 am

I want to know what products he uses on his hair…so I never make the mistake of trying them.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:21 pm

Mitt – hair looking extra greasy.

DrunkIrishman November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

I'll sum it up:

Romney: We find out he's really made of cardboard after a gust of wind knocks him over.

Perry: He actually forgot to show up.

Cain: Was sidetracked by some hot white ass in the audience.

Gingrich: Someone mistook him for Barbara Bush.

Paul: Starts calling the moderator his precious.

Bachmann: She keeps referring to Libya as labia.

Santorum: He does a magic show where he pulls a fetus out of his ass.

Huntsman: Huntsman storms off the stage when the moderators keep calling him Mitt.

coolhandnuke November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

I polished off 15 deviled eggs one Thanksgiving when I was eight. I projectile vomitted on my creepy uncle Dale. Watching this vomitfest makes me want to eat 50 eggs.
And nobody can eat 50 eggs.

DrunkIrishman November 22, 2011 at 8:36 pm

Let me guess, this was your uncle Dave…
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ebE2K-jyyhg/SWDeCke4aLI

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:42 pm

OMG. I did something along those lines, but I think it was Easter and my Uncle's name shall be withheld to protect me from crazy family

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:44 pm

What a weird coincidence, that story and your boardname.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:43 pm

I didn't need even one egg to decorate my lap when Paul Wolfowitz showed up as a questioner. When the hell are the war crimes trials going to start?

AnAmericanInTO November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

Why is it that every GOP debate is opposite the X Factor? Probably because it is its own series at this point. Hell, it's lasted longer than The Playboy Club.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

Dumbass, the TSA is not unionized.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

Oh no. they put Perry and Mittens next to each other. Fist fight!

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:22 am

Love the catty look Mittens gave The Rickster at 0:22.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

"There's a different body of law that relates to war…" Which should've cleared the khmer rouge when THEY waterboarded, but for some reason, no.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

Perry: Yes, You may have heard. I AM a dumbass.
~

JustPixelz November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

I think Mitt just promised martial law in U.S. because we're at perpetual war.

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:22 pm

No, just Ron Pee.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:23 pm

I do enjoy the anti union talk. Please tell me that even the worst racist shithead union worker understands they can't vote repug.

gvvt November 22, 2011 at 10:52 pm

sorry….

yyyaz November 22, 2011 at 11:22 pm

I would, but I'd be lying.

Negropolis November 22, 2011 at 11:34 pm

That was kind of amazing. It didn't have anything to do with anything they were talking about. It was such a gratuitous pander it's something they'd do on SNL. Yeah, the TSA is evil 'cause unions. Perry smash!

JustPixelz November 22, 2011 at 8:23 pm

Rick Perry is complaining about lack of intelligence. I don't think he's being ironic.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:23 pm

Dear TSA,

Stop touching my boobs.

Also, Ricky? TSA duties were privatized prior to (/11

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:23 pm

Dog sex Profiling! Go Santo Claus!!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:23 pm

Private-sector security screeners at Logan did SO WELL on the morning of September 11…

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:23 pm

Little Ricky: Santorum is coming all the way back!
~

OurHoboSenator November 22, 2011 at 8:24 pm

Ugh, fuck you, Santorum.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:24 pm

Ricky: Profile those most likely to commit crimes.
Paul : Tim MCVeigh

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 8:25 pm

Santorum's talking. Time to comment on Wonkette instead of listening.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:25 pm

Shouldn't someone point out to Santorum that there were no civil rights during the Civil War?

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:30 pm

Lincoln suspended habeas corpus. It's allowed in the Constitimitution.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:37 pm

I totally stand corrected M. Janitor.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:25 pm

If we're at war, why do you still want to lower taxes?

gvvt November 22, 2011 at 10:54 pm

so we can continue to do our patriotic shopping

bauserdotcom November 22, 2011 at 11:02 pm

Because the terrorists hate us for our high taxes!

yyyaz November 22, 2011 at 11:04 pm

To make the leetist libruls cry?

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:25 pm

That's two sensible comments for Ron Paul. Need to drink moar.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:24 am

After this debate, I'll bet Ron wants to join you for one or ten toasts…

JustPixelz November 22, 2011 at 8:26 pm

They keep talking about the things we can and should do because we're "at war". I would agree if Congress would declare war. And of course, if we're at war we'll need to bring back the draft. Go ahead Congress — if you have the balls.

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 8:32 pm

The very thing that made Newt so entertaining when he named a relative who had served. The Newster got married, then got his wife pregnant everytime selective service raised the number of children you had to have to avoid the draft.

That's the real reason he divorced her, because he was aged out of the draft.

BOMB IRAN!!!

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:26 pm

It's hard to watch…Ron Paul is so right on the 20% he's right on….if only he wasn't crazy.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:27 pm

HERM accuses Furry of oversimplifying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:28 pm

"No Blitz" obleege

(Nice comeback, Bitz)

JustPixelz November 22, 2011 at 8:28 pm

Cain says we should use every means at our disposal to kill as many terrorists as possible. Nuke 'em from space. It's the only way to be sure.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:28 pm

"No, Blitz" Then I'm gonna try to not answer this question…..oh, yeah, I'll ask "professionals."

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:28 pm

Here comes neocon brown-bomber Fred Kagan w/the who-to-bomb-next question.

WTF is up w/these celebrity questioners?

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:27 pm

Jus' the po' man's version of Newt, one-L, and Hermie – every TeeVee appearance raises their speaker's fees.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:28 pm

Go easy, Blitz

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:29 pm

Is that Torture Freak Marc Thiessen next to Kagan?

That greasy face looks disgustingly familiar.
~

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:29 pm

Drones? They can't possibly manage to kill all Pakistanis, so I don't think they're enough.

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:35 pm

Nukes are the only way to get a low per-dead-Brown unit price.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:29 pm

Answer the question, HMan, would you increase the use of drones in Pakistan or not?

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:28 pm

He's gotta ask the generals first – General Electric, General Dynamic …

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:29 pm

Random citizen Kagan. WTF?!?!?

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:30 pm

"Miche1e, you're a member of the Intelligence Committee…"

8 of the scariest words in the English language.
~

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:31 pm

Is it petty to say that these podiums look better then the last ones?

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:36 pm

If you like art Deco radiators, yes. And I do!

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:40 pm

Yeah, but the last ones looked like metal tubing with a slab of lucite. creepy 1980s

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:31 pm

One-L : A nation that lies……..which?

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:32 pm

Michele is on the Intelligence Committee.

And she chairs the Oxymoron Caucus.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:33 pm

++++++

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:32 pm

Too.. many… stupid… people… at… one… time. It's making my inner ear all fucked up and I'm nauseous. I think I'm gonna pretend this a West Coast ballgame, turn off the TV and check the box score in the morning.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:21 pm

I can't imagine how you score something like this.

STUPID – ∞
AMERICA – 0

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:33 pm

I am drinking Golden Gris from Alexis Bailly Vineyard in Hastings, Minnesota

littlebigdaddy November 22, 2011 at 8:56 pm

Doesn't sound that good, but better than watching this shit unaided.

HempDogbane November 22, 2011 at 8:57 pm

Shouldn't that be Baily, with one-L? I hate it when the liquor store is all out of the better South Dakota wines.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:02 pm

Which South Dakota wine do you prefer? My favorite is Prairie Berry… and Alexis Bailly is definitely two LLs. These wines rock

HempDogbane November 22, 2011 at 9:09 pm

Shade', from Volga. That was a failed Michele joke, Maman.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:23 pm

Dang. I missed that one on my last trip west. I wanted to go there and Desmet due to being a total Laura Ingalls nerd. What is your favorite wine there? Going to Oregon this summer and will have another chance to drive by…

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:24 pm

Sorry, regional American wine nerd. Can't help myself.

Indiepalin November 22, 2011 at 8:33 pm

Homestar Runner. Good one.

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 8:33 pm

Perry says fuck the starving Africans. Does he realize Israel is the biggest recipient? Which is why, of course, they have all those new, shiny weapon systems.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:22 pm

Let them eat depleted uranium.

Mumbly_Occupado November 22, 2011 at 8:34 pm

Oh God, there's another one of these?

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 8:34 pm

Is Bachmann trying to swallow her own tongue?

HempDogbane November 22, 2011 at 8:58 pm

According to that picture with W, she can swallow any tongue she damn well pleases !

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 8:35 pm

Oh, gawd. Can you imagine what an idiot like Perry could do to Pakistan/India relations. What are the odds he's never heard of Partition?

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:39 pm

He is in favor of Partition, but only when it's in a pear tree.

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 8:45 pm

Holiday themed snark. Well played, sir.

LiveToServeYa November 22, 2011 at 9:19 pm

They still have Post-Partition Depression.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:35 pm

Heritage Foundation?!?!?

Good job CNN.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:35 pm

Good Lord, Did one-L just sound non retard and school Ricky? Is it me or my meds?

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:23 pm

Maybe it's her meds.

MaxUdargo November 22, 2011 at 8:35 pm

And I'm reminded that I haven't watched a Homestar Runner video in years, so I'm off to more edifying pursuits.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:36 pm

Michele calls Perry's views naive.

And Alanis Morissette just said, Oh, yeah–that's a real example, isn't it?

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:34 am

Isn't it ironic?

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:36 pm

HOT MORMON ON MORMON ACTION!
~

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:24 pm

As opposed to the rest of the time, when it is hot moron on moron action.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:39 am

This was one of the best catfights of the season!

fuflans November 22, 2011 at 8:37 pm

i must confess i am more interested in the cepacol ad i just clicked on by accident.

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:37 pm

Huntsy always sounds a bit desperate, as well he should since this is his last shot — Daddy's outa $$$!

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:39 pm

Barry could always send him back to China, although I vote for bringing back Ambassador Duke for a second shot at the Chinese.

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 8:39 pm

Indo-fucking-nesia in the 1960s as a fucking ROLE MODEL?!?!?

Romney you stupid fucking cunt! In 1965-66, the fucking Sukarno regime slaughtered between 500,000 to 1 million civilians because they might have been 'commies.' Oh, and here's the best bit:

The American Embassy in Jakarta supplied the Indonesian military with lists of up to 5,000 suspected Communists.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:43 pm

Thanks for that.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:45 pm

Hey, he's Republican. He knows.

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 8:47 pm

How could he be so wrong about this? All you have to do is watch that movie, back in the days when Mel Gibson was gorgeous and didn't talk, except in the movies.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:48 pm

Linda Hunt makes a great midget activist.

SorosBot November 22, 2011 at 10:34 pm

They're not wrong; they think that slaughtering that many people is a good thing, as long as they're the "wrong kind" of people (Muslim/"commie"/"uppity" black/"uppity" women/"illegals"/etc.).

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:25 pm

These are the people who have to defend killing a million people in Iraq for no good reason so….

Fucking psychopaths.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:42 pm

That one made me sit up in my chair out of a snooze. So much for any thoughts I might have had that Mittens isn't a freaking sociopath.

user-of-owls November 23, 2011 at 12:13 am

No shit. Even more infuriating is the fact that, as far as I can tell, no one is following up on this lapse of sanity on the news sites or even the blogs.

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:40 pm

Now that I've turned off the television, I feel much better. Those people frighten me.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:43 pm

That's the central plank of the Republican Party platform.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:40 pm

Oh my God, Huntsman is so normal that maybe he'll be the next not-Romney.

Wait, these are republicans.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:41 pm

Oh, God, The dripping contempt from Newt is sooooooooo precious.

I sooooo wish I had him as a professor in college.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:45 pm

Has anyone had the Newter as a Prof

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:48 pm

Would you've put a thumb tack on his chair?

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:44 pm

No, but I'd cram an apple and a bunch of flowers up his fat ass.

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 8:51 pm

I soooo wish I had him as a student in college. Would've given the prick an F for Fucking Smarmy Moron.

Chichikovovich November 22, 2011 at 9:04 pm

Sometime I just want to visit the Tulane campus. Then I can go down to the library, and find one of the bound copies Newt's PhD. I'll look up who his committee was – ie the people who passed it. Then I'll track the chowderheads down and pepper-spray them for bringing shame on all universities everywhere.

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 9:44 pm

My understanding is that they all were 'sent down' after that.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:41 pm

Gingrich is just blathering for applause.
~

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:42 pm

Ricky Is Lam!!!!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:42 pm

Newt's about due for an attack on the media round about now….

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 8:43 pm

Mittney is lying about leaving Iraq–Bush signed it to keep the Dems from leaving too fast. Blitz just lets this shit go,

BTW–There isn't anyone currently participating in this ilve blog who doesn't know more about foreign affairs and world history than anyone on that stage, with the exception of Huntsman, who should be ashamed of himself for associating with these dumbfucks. Why doesn't the dumb bastard switch parties on the condition Obama gives him cool ambassadorships? Like Bermuda?

To repeat–we of the wonkeratti know a hell of a lot more about the world than these clowns.

Chichikovovich November 22, 2011 at 9:06 pm

World affairs? Sure, but why stop there? We also know more about Marcus Bachmann's sexuality than Michele does.

Geminisunmars November 23, 2011 at 1:01 am

I'm pretty sure we know more about any randomly named topic than any of these sterling examples of leadership (maybe excepting Huntsperson). Perhaps we don't know as much about the inner workings of the C Street – I couldn't get past the 2nd chapter of Jeff Sharlet's "Family" (it made me ill – just like this line up of debasers, I mean debaters).

BaldarTFlagass November 23, 2011 at 9:51 am

"Everything they know is wrong!"

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:43 pm

John Huntsman: Muslim-hugger.

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 8:43 pm

A commercial! Now it might get interesting!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:44 pm

WTF, Blitz? Is this Jeopardy?

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:46 pm

Yes.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:47 pm

I'll take Potent Potables for $1000, Alex

BaldarTFlagass November 22, 2011 at 8:50 pm

Michele: I'd like "Bible" for a hundred.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:47 pm

It would have been a lot more enjoyable if it had had more Don Pardo.

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 8:45 pm

Oh, I guess they don't show the commercials on the Intertubes. And it's still way more interesting!

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:47 pm

If we are guessing on number one threat, Hubs chooses syphilis. I say global warming

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:48 pm

Blow Up Iran Time!

Everybody DRINK!
~

DerrickWildcat November 22, 2011 at 8:48 pm

Even too dumb to ask a question.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:49 pm

Oh, no….No one will stand up with Israel on this stage. Is this question neccessary?

Wait, Herman is going to ask more experts about what to do.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 8:49 pm

Gotta eat something or vodka poisoning will ensue.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:50 pm

Let's team up with our Jewish pals and put on a show in the old Gulf!

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:50 pm

Ron Paul: STOP MAKING SENSE! Declarations of war are soooo old fashioned.

Indiepalin November 22, 2011 at 8:50 pm

Herb Cain wants to build an electrified fence between Afghanistan and North Korea.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:51 pm

End the Fed's control of Israel!!

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 8:51 pm

Haha! Cain's really sticking with the "bombs don't work on mountains" strategy.

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:39 pm

Oh, god, he really said that? I thought Ken was joking.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:52 pm

Is everyone there from the American Enterprise Institute?

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 8:53 pm

Hey Blitz, stop with the fiction that, "now a question from our audience" and just say, "here's another war shill from AEI."

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 9:00 pm

Wolfie even! No shame! It's Neocons on Parade tonight! Kagan!

Maybe they can find Tommy Franks, too.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:53 pm

Oh, good, another Rick Perry retard moment.

sati_demise November 22, 2011 at 8:54 pm

Ken is so brave he deserves a drink to treat shock.

not watching. even if you paid me, so thanks, Ken

hockeymom November 22, 2011 at 8:54 pm

This appears to be the perfect day to rejoin the Wonkette fold.
Carry on.

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:40 pm

Welcome back!

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:50 pm

Where ya been?

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:54 pm

We have no real financial influence over Iran. It's time to impose tougher sanctions on Europe.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:51 pm

Can we impose tougher economic sanctions on U.S. Congresspersons?

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 8:54 pm

Oops. Left a second to practice some paper art (with some dried grass) and missed Iran. Who was the first guy who said Bomb Iran?

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:41 pm

All of them, Katie.

Sorry.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:52 pm

HENNGGGHH!!!

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 8:54 pm

There's plenty of Heritage Foundation types, too.

P.S. Of all these assholes, I think I despise Gingrich the most.

He's Mr. blathering, condescending sound-bite man.
~

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:32 pm

Newt's a good choice, but I just can't get over that empty headed evil prick, little Ricky Santorum.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:53 pm

The contest between those two is which one got beat up the most in junior high school.

Negropolis November 23, 2011 at 12:01 am

Maybe it's only because I agreed with him, but I did like the part of the debate where he said he'd take the heat for treating Mexicans something slightly more than subhuman, and enough people in the audience clapped to give me an inkling of hope. lol

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:54 am

Of all these assholes, I think I despise Gingrich the most.
The classic line applies again…
All of 'em, Katie…

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 8:55 pm

According to CNN's crowd shots, Newt is the only one who's married. Or maybe they're just trying to see if she has cancer yet.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:54 pm

Her hair and her nose are part of the stage lighting.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:54 am

Or the other spouses duck every time the camera spans in their direction. I know I would.

Negropolis November 23, 2011 at 8:50 pm

When they put the lights on Callista, I swear I saw her recoil, as if the light was burning her. You know, melting her human skin to reveal her true lizard scales.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 8:55 pm

OH JEEBUS Newtie just declared war on Iran.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:56 pm

Newt's writing! Hide the children!

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:56 pm

Yeah, Newt "Frankly" we could replace the Iranian regime in approx a year. Yeah.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:33 pm

Probably be a cake walk.

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:42 pm

It was so easy last time!

yyyaz November 22, 2011 at 11:45 pm

Not to mention it will pay for itself and yield an incalculable peace dividend for future generations. Frick. And also, Frack.

Geminisunmars November 23, 2011 at 1:12 am

They will greet us with flowers and kisses.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:56 pm

Why haven't we seized the tar sands from our enemy to the north?

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:58 pm

Kind of time-consuming and messy to dig 'em up, bring 'em back, etc. But KBR and Haliburton could do it for the right price.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:56 pm

We have a quota of only one seized wasteland per decade, and we seized two last decade.

Master Janitor V572 November 22, 2011 at 8:57 pm

Fucking Wolfie's there? Jesus, call in a Predator/HELLFIRE strike right here, right now!

DerrickWildcat November 22, 2011 at 8:57 pm

And too dumb to answer one.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 8:58 pm

Africa was a country on the brink? Did I hear that correctly

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:43 pm

I heard the clip on the BBC, and yes. Yes. Africa is a country, and this should come as no surprise from these assclowns.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:57 pm

Sarah Palin's in the race?

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 8:58 pm

Paul Fucking Wolfowitz??!!! WTF!!!!!! Are they TRYING to see how much the wonketteers can take?! Holy fucking shit!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:58 pm

Africans do not need money to fight AIDS. They need to reject Satan and his Muslim allies.

Indiepalin November 22, 2011 at 8:58 pm

Santorum: "Africa was a country on the brink" before he stepped in.

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:45 pm

Now it's a frothy mix of many countries.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:58 pm

"The Sarah is strong in you."

Negropolis November 23, 2011 at 12:05 am

WIN! ROTFLMAO!

HateMachine November 22, 2011 at 8:58 pm

THIS JUST IN: Slightly delaying a decision on a filthy oil tube that won't just demolish the environment but also make all the wrong people fabulously wealthy constitutes "Unilateral disarmament." Source: Michelle Bachmann

Oh, and also, buying a fuckton of oil from Canada reduces our reliance on "foreign oil."

Biff November 22, 2011 at 9:21 pm

Makes sense to me, does it ta ewe?

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:59 pm

America? America, Jr.? Whuz the difference?

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 8:59 pm

Holy shit–Rick Santorum just said something intelligent about the consequences of slashing foreign aid….

JackObin November 22, 2011 at 8:59 pm

This is just like the Lincoln/Douglas debates, minus Lincoln, Douglas and a relevant nation.

Limeylizzie November 22, 2011 at 9:00 pm

Paul Wolfowitz and his holey socks and dirty hair…shudder.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:00 pm

Ron Paul doesn't like sending foreign aid overseas. We must keep foreign aid at home.

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:00 am

And send all the foreigners overseas.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:01 pm

Look at Romney mugging for the camera!

That lizard inside is itching to get out.
~

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 9:01 pm

Anyone read "Fiasco?" A retired army officer (who didn't want to be named) blamed Wolfowitz for being #1 cause of Iraq. The officer described his as: "dangerously ideological and crack-smoking stupid."

Come to think of it, that pretty much describes most Republitards, esp. for the"DIACSS" (See Wolfy, above) crowd in that room right now.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:07 pm

Again, I learn something new from a well read DBB.

"dangerously ideological and crack-smoking stupid." Description win.

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:48 pm

I was under the impression that Wolfowitz and his ilk suffered from a huge amount of guilt from the LAST time they instigated an overthrow of Saddam, only to simply let their Shiite buddies be slaughtered by the regime once we had chased Iraq out of Kuwait. I don't excuse anything that Wolfie or any of his fellow neocons have done, but I had read accounts that he was so haunted by the first Gulf War… that he decided to kill millions in a second?

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:03 am

Oh, it all balances out in the end. Hopefully in his end. With a flaming pool cue.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:02 pm

Reboot the Mittster!

REBOOT!
~

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:03 pm

Yeah, Mitt, we can't indict for not upholding the Geneva convention since we don't.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:04 pm

Ken, this is a fine live blog debate moment for you. I'm loving your comments. It's a shame it's on this piece of shit, change nothing debate.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:05 pm

Newtie wants to collapse the Oil Industry?

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:49 pm

I can't wait to see how he explains this one.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:05 pm

Ron Paul wears his heart on his sleeve.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:35 pm

He's just trying to point out that he's the only one up there that actually has one.

Negropolis November 22, 2011 at 11:30 pm

Apparently, he doesn't have heart of international AIDs victims, or any kind of heart for humantarian, in general. His consistency is both madly admirable and madly annoying.

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 9:07 pm

Huntsmen: "I could see Afghanistan from my embassy!"

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:08 pm

Isn't this the perfect opportunity to kidnap Wolfowitz and drag his ass to the Hague?

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:36 pm

Can't we just feed him to Newt?

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 9:09 pm

Anyone read "Fiasco?" A retired army officer (who didn't want to be named) blamed Wolfowitz for being #1 cause of Iraq. The officer described his as: "dangerously ideological and crack-smoking stupid."

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:09 pm

Obama is to blame for the supercommittee…. OK, sounds good.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:09 pm

GOODHAIR iz a Commander in Chief, y'all!
~

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 9:10 pm

Holy Fuck! Got foodz and saw that Wolfie was there. Fucker ruined my joke asking if Bolton had been an audience question!

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 9:10 pm

Rick! Get your finger out of your nose! Blitz just noticed him, standing down there.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:10 pm

Funny, Leon Panetta did resign once…in 1969, when Nixon was undercutting him at the Civil Rights division of HEW….

memzilla November 22, 2011 at 9:12 pm

Please, NO MORE CLOSEUPS OF CRAZY EYES.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:14 pm

God damn that Kenyan Muslim Atheist communist Nazi socialist America-hating Obama for being so divisive. He has poisoned the tone of American politics.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 9:15 pm

Just turned the sound back on, and somehow cutting Social Security is the topic.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:15 pm

Everyone who asks a question for the American Enterprise Institute has some nervous looking woman within 3 seats staring desperately at them. Did they all bring their moms?

lulzmonger November 22, 2011 at 11:47 pm

Minders from the RNC Politburo, who are nervous because they've been tasked with activating the AEI's mandatory intravenous cyanide-pumps the moment anyone goes rogue.

SarahsBush November 22, 2011 at 9:15 pm

Uh, Michele, popping pills doesn't qualify you as "involved" in the debt discussion.

proudgrampa November 22, 2011 at 9:15 pm

I am so glad I decided to watch NCIS.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:15 pm

Gingrich is leering at One L.
~

cheetojeebus November 22, 2011 at 9:16 pm

why does Newt always looks to me like he just shat his pants and believes no one will notice?

RadiosTyrone November 22, 2011 at 9:19 pm

Because he's been shitting on us for 30 years. In fact, he is just a spontaneously reproducing pile of shit.

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 7:33 am

This is my new favorite description of the Newster. Perfect.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:17 pm

I seem to recall a fellow who actually did balance the budget…let's see…in 1999…think he had a "D" after his name….

RadiosTyrone November 22, 2011 at 9:22 pm

Haha Dok, the latest talking point is that it was the Repub congress that did that. When a few months ago I heard them saying it was never balanced, it was an accounting trick.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:26 pm

It is hard to keep up on the talking points, is it not?

RadiosTyrone November 22, 2011 at 10:54 pm

Good point. Lies on top of misrepresentations, packed with inanity, layered with deceit.

yyyaz November 22, 2011 at 11:02 pm

Then drizzled with santorum.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:19 pm

When we return, the favorite past time of the TeaTardpublican Party, BEANER BASHING!! (crowd claps, fade live camera to commercial)

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 9:22 pm

Aiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Al Qaida en Acapulco!!!!!!!!!!!!

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:27 pm

!!!!!!!Jihad in Jalisco!!!!!!!!

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:51 pm

¡Sharia in Sinaloa!

Negropolis November 22, 2011 at 11:59 pm

¡Mohammedans in Mexicali!

memzilla November 22, 2011 at 9:19 pm

Everyone count with me, when they pan the studio audience, how many not-white people do you see?

HAH, trick question, you don't need to watch this dreck to get the correct answer.

Chichikovovich November 22, 2011 at 9:26 pm

I'm not watching. (I recommend it – just read and let the snark infuse your spirit.) So I can make a guess: There are more African Americans on the podium than in the audience. Amirite people?

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:11 am

During the 45 minutes I watched, there was a minority questioner (forget what kind, but not A-A), followed by a Hispanic questioner, followed by a female questioner from the audience. Maybe if I'd had the stomach to watch any more, I could answer your question.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:21 pm

And now, I start drinking.

Yes, I know I'm playing catch-up…

(Mmm, Sierra Nevada "Celebration Ale")

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:13 am

Good choice. I was drinking Big Sky Brewing Moose Drool brown ale. Seemed most appropriate for the occasion. Except the "brown" part.

4tehlulz_lite November 22, 2011 at 9:21 pm

Ken Layne was a copy editor of the Elders of Zion.

LiveToServeYa November 22, 2011 at 9:24 pm

Hah! I 'LOL'-ed

LiveToServeYa November 22, 2011 at 9:23 pm

Fuck all these cocksuckers and the cocks they sucked in on. Whatevers.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 9:23 pm

As a believer in truth in advertizing I think this National Security Debate should be renamed Fear and Dread in America.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 9:24 pm

Finally a question from the Left Wing Heritage Foundation!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 9:24 pm

Fucking Monroe Doctrine?!?!? Oh the fucking humanity.

shrillharpy November 22, 2011 at 9:24 pm

Just got here. Did I miss anything? Oh, wait. Never mind.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:25 pm

To stop the drug cartels, we must kick out all the messicans that are here. And I heard something about the Monroe Doctrine, so I'll mention that. Hamas is smuggling drugs, also, too.

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 9:25 pm

"What can we do for the Mexican government to stop the drug war?"

Um, stop buying drugs?

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 9:59 pm

Never!

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:17 am

We need to bring illegal drug manufacturing back home with tax breaks*, government incentives and public-private partnerships.

* I meant to say "tax breaks for the rich" – who am I kidding here?

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:25 pm

"Ron Paul, do you agree with that crazy dumbass Goodhair?"

"No, Blitzer, you fucking retard."
~

e_z November 22, 2011 at 9:27 pm

W D 42?

Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:27 pm

Ron Paul sounds like a college freshman trying to cram everything into an essay exam in the last five minutes of the period.

ThundercatHo November 22, 2011 at 9:27 pm

Ron Paul wants to cancel the drug war! That's great since if one of these assholes wins we will need to be stoned everyday. Legalize marijuana!

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 9:28 pm

Why is stupid Herman worried about how many Mexicans were "keeled" last year?

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:31 pm

What do you do with a drunken sailor, ear-lye in the morning?

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:49 pm

I dunno if Hermie was ever a drunken sailor, but that clown definitely has had some lye in his ear in the morning – multiple times.

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 9:50 pm

Careful. The Republicans might hear you!

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 3:29 am

"40% of Mexicans believe their country is a failed state"
I'd *love* to know the % of *Americans* who would say the same about today's USA…

ProgressiveInga November 22, 2011 at 9:29 pm

HaHaHaHaHa…..
I'm watching Big instead of those GOP/Losers.

Penny Marshall/Tom Hanks 2012!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:29 pm

States need to have the right to deport people.

shrillharpy November 22, 2011 at 9:29 pm

Gawd damn, Cain. Just cuz you make something illegal doesn't make it immoral. Fucker.

Fred_Wertham_Jr November 22, 2011 at 9:29 pm

Oh, 8 o'clock Eastern. Thank God I can get a fair and accurate account at Wonkette. It's like a fucking transcript.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 3:30 am

I'm watching the re – run, and I can assure you that Wonkette's summary is spot – on…

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:32 pm

To acquire more Einsteins, we should encourage more foreign governments to oppress their best and brightest.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:32 pm

Newtie is stuck on WWII.

Let's start a Manhattan Project on the mexicans!
~

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 9:32 pm

Oh christ, the only thing scarier than watching the wretches on the stage is when they pan the audience. It looks exactly like the depictions of Hell by juiced up religious fanatics in the Middle Ages.

littlebigdaddy November 22, 2011 at 9:36 pm

Is that guy with the shaving cream from THG there?

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 9:33 pm

30,000 engineers!!!!!!!!!
Bullshit!

Limeylizzie November 22, 2011 at 9:33 pm

OT but MrLimeylizzie just called me to tell me that my beloved cat, Neville, has gone missing in LA. I am weeping like a 3 year old.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:35 pm

Oh, hell and spit! So sorry to hear that!

Limeylizzie November 22, 2011 at 9:36 pm

He's the best cat,really dumb and really loving. He has done this once before and came back, so I am sort of hopeful, it is just awful because i am in NYC until next Thursday amd MrLimeylizzie feels so guilty.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:37 pm

So….the cat came back? The very next day? Thought he was a goner but he wouldn't stay away?

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 7:42 am

Please let us know when the li'l fella is back. My kitty Ethel Mertz II went missing one time for two weeks. Kids and I went around stapling notices to telephone poles, checked the shelter twice a day, etc. One morning here she comes strolling up the driveway, all "oh hello, yes you may feed me now." Keep hope alive Limeylizzie!

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 7:57 am

He came back!!!! MrLimeylizzie called at about 3am NY time, he was painting and had kept the screen door open and heard a little meow and there was Neville, none the worse for wear. He is an indoor cat, except for on the deck, but was feral when we adopted him, so he sometimes heeds the call of the wild.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 8:20 am
Biff November 22, 2011 at 9:39 pm

Oh, crap. Hope he comes home soon…

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:40 pm

Oh, Limeyl, I feel your pain. So awful! Here's all good thoughts towards you and Neville.

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 9:42 pm

Oh no! Tell MrLimeylizzie to rig up a projector, find a large outdoor wall and broadcast an #OccupyYourKittyBedNeville cat sign!

I'll give Nabi, our bloated girl, a bunch of extra rubs and tell her to activate the Help-A-Cat-Home neural network they have.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:52 pm

BUILD THE WALL!!!1!

I hopez your kitty getz back safe and sound too, Lizzie

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:48 pm

Oh I am so sorry. Keep your eyes open and then give that cat a bath when he gets home. I think it is part of a negative reinforcement

shrillharpy November 22, 2011 at 9:54 pm

I'm relatively new to the board but hope yer cat comes home safely.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:54 pm

Limey, yours is the only real problem we've discussed tonight that means anything.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 10:05 pm

I have had cats around most of my life and I know how you feel. The little bastards can tug at your heart while puking in your shoes. Cats are survivors Ms. Lizzie. I hope and bet he returns in sound shape.

Extemporanus November 22, 2011 at 10:17 pm

My black & white Bengal's bags are packed, and she's poised to hop the first flight to LA to aid in the search. Please ensure that a driver, one large moth, and a half-pound of raw hamburger is waiting for her upon arrival.

I've little doubt that Neville's long bottom will be back home in no time, Lizzie!

user-of-owls November 23, 2011 at 12:18 am

Peace of mind in our time.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 3:08 am

Oh, I am so sorry to hear that…try posting photos to Craigslist and the like, and around the neighborhood. Good luck.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:34 pm

We need engineers. But let's remember: Science is evil.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:34 pm

OneL's lipstick color make her lips look like she has Joker lips.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:40 pm

I don't want to scare you, but it's not the lipstick.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:53 pm

She's the pompatus of love.

ThundercatHo November 22, 2011 at 10:10 pm

I was thinking the same plus I'm pretty sure she borrowed Marcus' false eyelashes.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 10:14 pm

Only his panty hose.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:35 pm

"…as somebody who believes strongly in family." ROFLMAO. Come on guy, you're killing me.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:36 pm

If they keep praising higher education like this, they're gonna alienate the base…

SudsMcKenzie November 22, 2011 at 9:36 pm

Magnets??, Oooh please, tell me how they work.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:37 pm

This is a party that loves immigration so we can have people to cut our lawns, clean our toilets, raise our kids….

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:37 pm

Now for the Newt – Mittens smug-off.
~

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 9:37 pm

Newtie lurves teh illegals!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Joshua Norton November 22, 2011 at 9:37 pm

I had to watch a very important "Ned & Stacey" rerun. Has anyone cheered for killing puppies yet?

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:38 pm

FUCKING MAGNETS!!!
~

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 3:36 am

We want those brains!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:38 pm

Newt said "compassion." He's dead meat now.

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 7:47 am

Perhaps his handlers have advised him to try to act like a human every now and then?

Dok-cupy Everything November 23, 2011 at 9:13 am

If so, they should know better. The Base wants a Terminator, not a human.

Negropolis November 23, 2011 at 8:52 pm

No shit. Remember when Perry chastised the audience for not having a heart if they didn't agree with him?

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 9:41 pm

Arab Spring muthafuckaaaaaaaaas!!

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:43 pm

After the commercial, from Drone Bombing Messcans, we move on to carpet bombing muslims, but first a word from new and improved Asswipes…

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:44 pm

9:40 PM — Elderly crowd now fully asleep, livebloggers near death, not even Wine & Marijuana & Irish Breakfast Tea can save us now.

Party at Ken's place!
~

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 9:45 pm

Jesus h-fucking Christ! How many debates are they going to have? Seriously, this has been enough time to hear every thought everyone of them has ever had. Twice.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 3:17 am

According to this, we've got thirteen more freak shows on the way: http://www.2012presidentialelectionnews.com/2012-
Stock up at your local liquor store now…

shrillharpy November 22, 2011 at 9:45 pm

Syria…. hmmm. lemme think about that for… uh, what? Did you say Syria? Huh, my mind's twirling…

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:48 pm

Syree, syree, syree, syria, bo nan a nana bo bana, syria.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 9:45 pm

Heritage Foundation.
Hissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:45 pm

Herman Cain does not know where the fuck Syria is. 9-9-9!

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 7:49 am

It's over there somewhere near the country of Africa, right?

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:49 pm

Cain: We established a no-fly zone at Godfather's using pest strips.
~

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 9:49 pm

Diversity!!!! Woman from AEI !!!!!!!!!

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:58 pm

The Arab Emirates Islamistics?

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 9:49 pm

Ron Paul going to get booed in 3…2…1…

SudsMcKenzie November 22, 2011 at 9:49 pm

Ottoman Empire, … that is the sound of a million FOX viewers scratching their heads.

anniegetyerfun November 22, 2011 at 11:58 pm

I done built a fort outta couch cushions before, but a whole empire outta a footstool?

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:27 am

Hermie's got visions of Dick Van Vader twirling 'round in his haid.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 9:50 pm

Heritage Foundation._Hissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!!

user-of-owls November 22, 2011 at 9:55 pm

That's two. One more and you get a complimentary broach depicting a brainwashed lower-middle class Fox viewer clutching the Republican asp to his breast.

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:28 am

That's two times I've seen repeats on this page. Somebody needs to waterboard Intense Debate.

Gratuitous World November 22, 2011 at 9:51 pm

the answer is we need to develop more mountains.

is this thing on?

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:45 pm

They develop new mountains of horse-shit with each one of these debates.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 9:51 pm

Oh dear god Ron is quoting Wolfowitz like he's a source of knowledge.

Nothingisamiss November 22, 2011 at 9:52 pm

Right? See, when he's right, he sounds so good. Then he starts a sentence with something like "Paul Wolfowitz says……"

Millennial Malaise November 22, 2011 at 10:07 pm

i felt the same thing with John Huntsman. I was really digging his Trust Deficit angle, even if it was kind of clunky.

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:52 pm

Romney SMASH!
~

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:52 pm

I would venture the bold idea that a no-fly zone over Syria is unnecessary because Assad isn't using his air force against the people of Syria.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 9:52 pm

No one would ever dare attack us if a guy named Mittens is our President.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 9:53 pm

Give Mitt credit for dissing both Ron Paul and Barack in one answer.

Gratuitous World November 22, 2011 at 9:53 pm

good evening, I'm here for the Heritage Foundation Elephant Walk.

RadiosTyrone November 22, 2011 at 10:47 pm

We're here to help clean up the elephant shit trail.

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:31 am

Neesz moar John Wayne.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 9:54 pm

American Enterprise Institute
Boooooooooooooooooooo!

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:54 pm

Frothy, you aren't going anywhere.

Just sit down and shut up.
~

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 9:56 pm

He can go to hell.

Biel_ze_Bubba November 23, 2011 at 12:40 am

Gah!

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:55 pm

Socialism! The Comintern must be stopped!

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:56 pm

Kind of funny hearing Goodhair talk about the ash heaps of history.
~

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:56 pm

OMG. Al Qaeda in Venezuela.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 10:02 pm

Koran in Caracas!

anniegetyerfun November 23, 2011 at 12:00 am

I was going to go with Qur'an in Quito, but you beat me to it, by a good hour.

Fukui_sanYesOta November 23, 2011 at 12:02 am

Sharia in Santiago? Mullahs in Montevideo?

anniegetyerfun November 23, 2011 at 12:08 am

Arabs in Aruba*!*Republicans do not realize that Aruba is not in Latin America.

gvvt November 22, 2011 at 10:55 pm

The Taliban everywhere!

DerrickWildcat November 22, 2011 at 9:56 pm

They better get a move on and wrap this up. "Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?", starts in 4 minutes on Lifetime.

littlebigdaddy November 22, 2011 at 10:00 pm

No Trailer Park Boys on TVO?

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 9:56 pm

Yeah. Get ready for another coup, President Chavez.

Gratuitous World November 22, 2011 at 9:56 pm

the fire that turns China to ashes will be lit by a bill with Ben Franklin's picture on it.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:56 pm

We need a no-fly zone over pregnant Chinese women.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 9:57 pm

You know, sometimes Ron Paul sounds reasonable and sane then after a few seconds, wacko babble.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 9:58 pm

OMG pulse attack. Darth Vader vs. America

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 9:58 pm

We WON in Iraq! That is so totally awesome.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 9:58 pm

My guess is that these people are the biggest threat to America faces…uh, did huntsman just say godlessness?

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 9:59 pm

♫ Don't you love farce?
My fault I fear.
I thought that you'd want what I want.
Sorry, my dear.
But where are the clowns?
Quick, send in the clowns.
Don't bother, they've been here for the last two mind-bending hours.♫

ifthethunderdontgetya November 22, 2011 at 9:59 pm

Thank the FSM it's over.

Everybody drink.

And fuck A.E.I. and the Heritage Foundation.
~

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 10:03 pm

Yay!
Getya for President!
Drink!

Ken Layne November 22, 2011 at 10:03 pm

Cheers to that. Thanks to everybody for hanging out and making this TOLERABLE. xxoo, goodnight.

Blueb4sunrise November 22, 2011 at 10:05 pm

I raise a glass of…..I don't even know what I'm drinking ……….
anyway….here's to ya.

Mumbly_Occupado November 22, 2011 at 10:21 pm

Personally, I just can't wait until the #OWS/Center for American Progress debate that's obviously upcoming.

Wait, what's that? That thing doesn't exist and never will in any form for any primary season, ever?

Oh right, I forgot. "Liberal media", etc.

Barrelhse November 22, 2011 at 10:03 pm

Damn. The debate is only just now starting on my computer. I wish I had better broadband.

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:37 am

Broader bedpan might be more useful for watching.

littlebigdaddy November 22, 2011 at 10:03 pm

I gotta say I don't like this new reality show one bit. I'm sticking to You're Excused.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 10:03 pm

Can I go to bed now, mommy and daddy?

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 10:04 pm

Oh, no. Just got back from ironing my third napkin, getting cornbread out of the oven, cleaned the crap the old man left splattered inside the microwave, got 6 homemade pie shells out of the freezer, and was about to seed 3 poms for salads. Oh, and getting high.

I also had to hit "mute" to make the old man happy until I got rid of him.

So, did I miss much? Or is the only way to get anything out of this snooze-fest to read the wonkers' thoughts on the matter at hand.

finallyhappy November 22, 2011 at 10:37 pm

I seeded a pom too!(but then we ate the seeds) Are you making coconut macaroon pies? These are important things! I didn't watch the debate either- just read the comments

hebmskebm November 22, 2011 at 10:04 pm

Guys, do you realize there are THIRTEEN more Republican debates scheduled? This has already been dragged on so long and hit so many cities it's beginning to resemble an early 90's Guns 'N' Roses tour. Except all the crazy on that stage combined isn't nearly as crazy as Axl.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:13 pm

Are you serious? 26 more hours of this shit?

hebmskebm November 22, 2011 at 10:24 pm

Sadly, yes. At least there are only three more of them before the Iowa primaries.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:51 pm

Gawd. How mind numbing.

Though it would be totally awesome to tie up Grover Norquist, shoot him up with crystal meth, and make him watch all 40 hours or whatever of these all in a row.

Mumbly_Occupado November 22, 2011 at 10:24 pm

As I said elsewhere, they seem dead-set on disproving the adage, and demonstrating that there is, in fact, such a thing as bad publicity.

Fukui_sanYesOta November 22, 2011 at 11:49 pm

Another thirteen of these blasted things? It's like some form of deathmatch of stupidity.

Does, could, anyone watch this shit and make a decision based on the candidates' policy positions? It's just reheated pablum at best and dangerously dull-witted incoherent nonsense at worst.

It's absolutely stunning that anyone could watch these gormless dullards and think "oh, yes, (s)he seems a rather top notch candidate. (S)He shall receive my primary vote."

datateday November 22, 2011 at 10:05 pm

Miss the main debate thread when it was fresh – chug the entire keg!

SorosBot November 22, 2011 at 10:05 pm

Well, it took seven or eight tries while I just kept getting killed, but Willow the Breton mage (yeah not good with original names) just finally slaughtered the vampire clan that had planned to enslave the people of Morthal village as their blood-cows, burning them all with my and my summoned Atronach's flames while my companion smacked them with her giant Orcish warhammer. The rewards and selling the loot finally gave me enough to buy a house too.

…wait, another debate? Sorry I missed it.

Mumbly_Occupado November 22, 2011 at 10:11 pm

Ha, Skyrim is kinda great. My character's currently enrolled both in clown college, and in bard college.

(incidentally, the secret to slaughtering the vampires is obviously to turn into a Werewolf. Okay, maybe not actually*, but it's satisfying in a very ninja vs. pirate sort of way.)

*actually actually, it is, since vampires are asshole mages that run around and slow you down with magic; extra speed, plus a knockdown, plus a shout that sends the thralls running away is a recipe for win.

SorosBot November 22, 2011 at 11:00 pm

I'm working on the bard college now, after joining the mage college early on – it's pleasantly surprising to find that the Draugr who were nearly impossible when there were more than, like, two of them in the initial mage quests (and I had to actually turn down the difficulty for the two high-level ones) are now mostly jokes. Haven't gotten anywhere near becoming a werewolf yet, as the fighter's guild/"Companions" don't seem appropriate or easy for a pure mage character as mine is so far (best skill is alchemy, followed by destruction magic).

SudsMcKenzie November 22, 2011 at 10:11 pm

I was stuck in Ansvilund, looking for a sword, I missed almost all of this – thank god!11

p.s get the house in Markarth, totally worth the 8k.

slowhansolo November 23, 2011 at 12:54 am

Skyrim? Jesus, I need to look up from CoH.

Mumbly_Occupado November 22, 2011 at 10:06 pm

I do have to say, it's pretty great seeing a reunion of Paul Wolfowitz and also Dick Cheney's entire staff from his time as Vice President, in the audience at this debate. Basically, everyone who lied us into a war of aggression and then set up a secret torture regime under US jurisdiction, getting together, it was just like old times!

Honestly, the only thing that could have made this reunion party any better is if it actually had taken place at The Hague.

rickmaci November 22, 2011 at 10:11 pm

Did look the largest gathering of known criminals since the Appalachin Meeting in '57.

Chet Kincaid November 23, 2011 at 9:46 am

Mob Lore reference for the win. At least La Cosa Nostra were upfront about their foreign policy motives. "Fuck that spic Castro with a croupier stick!! He stole my Tropicana!!"

RadiosTyrone November 22, 2011 at 10:50 pm

Neo-NeoCons.

LiveToServeYa November 23, 2011 at 8:49 am

Could glitter bomb them in bright yellow to make them the Neon-Neocons.

Dudleydidwrong November 22, 2011 at 11:05 pm

Or in the cross-hairs (oops! surveyor's mark, sorry) of a drone strike.

Dok-cupy Everything November 22, 2011 at 10:07 pm

Now that the clown show is over, time to switch to PBS–Frontline has a pretty good one tonight.

DustBowlBlues November 22, 2011 at 10:43 pm

Me. too. The Republics should have skipped that silly debate and watched this instead.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 10:11 pm

At work this afternoon, I watched a two and a half-minute video of cars getting stacked up at a train crossing, and then the train going past, and then the cars taking off again. I'd rather watch that 50 times than watch two hours of this roadkill again.

snackypants November 22, 2011 at 10:13 pm

This is priceless: "8:32 PM — The split screen of Perry and Bachmann is horrifying. She looks like she is watching, in her mind, zombies crawl out of the corpse of a zebra who just ate Jesus."

Also, reading the debate transcript gave me vertigo.

Mumbly_Occupado November 22, 2011 at 10:18 pm

My favorite part was the part where everyone pretended that Paul Wolfowitz ever said things that weren't either the complete opposite of correct or deliberate lies, constantly.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 10:18 pm

O mighty overlord Ken, could we have Ms Benincasa do the live blog sometime, or is she persona au gratin here at teh Wonkette? It might make taking the shit thrown at us up on stage a little easier to take if we were getting monkey poop flung at us by sweet Sara at the same time.

snackypants November 22, 2011 at 10:19 pm

Okay, this line made my head spin in a good way:

"9:49 PM — Wooden power-suit Conservative Think Tank Youth Gal with her hair pulled back so hard it makes her eyes into giant pools of fearmongering foolishness, she has a question. It is about … Israel, Al Qaeda, something. She has never enjoyed a true orgasm."

I love you, Ken Layne.

ttommyunger November 22, 2011 at 10:24 pm

Somehow, Wolf Blitzer seems unsettlingly at home with this crowd.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:54 pm

Though Wolf seems to lack the pure evil of the candidates, he does fit in by virtue of his also being a vacuous idiot.

ttommyunger November 22, 2011 at 11:03 pm

He can read out-loud, though.

not that Dewey November 23, 2011 at 8:54 am

Sort of.

ttommyunger November 23, 2011 at 11:28 am

In a fourth-grader kind of way.

Negropolis November 22, 2011 at 11:32 pm

Wolf Blitzer is at home with any crowd so long as a goddamned camera is rolling. The consummate Washington courtier this ass is.

ttommyunger November 23, 2011 at 11:27 am

He must have an asshole the size of a fucking horse-collar by now.

lulzmonger November 23, 2011 at 12:02 am

Dude has perfected the ancient martial-art of Lapdog Fu.

Wolf knows every wrinkle in every taint on that stage by heart.

friendlyskies November 23, 2011 at 6:25 am

He knows that these are the only people in the world he could potentially beat on Jeopardy!

ttommyunger November 23, 2011 at 11:28 am

Wolf: the living example of the Peter Principle at its worst.

sbj1964 November 22, 2011 at 10:26 pm

How many times did they blame everything on the President ? I think they would try to blame him for killing Jesus,or the latest Twilight Movie. 8 years of GW Bush ,and the republican War-machine/Tax cuts for the rich/ Corrupt Banks,and lack of accountability in Congress is how we got here in the first place .These are the same people that broke the system telling us how they are qualified to fix it?

TanzbodenKoenig November 22, 2011 at 10:40 pm

Sweet Jesus Ken I don't know how you do it's I can't take these sad sack lick spittle mouthbreathers face to monitor anymore I'm glad you're here to do it for me. When you need a liver transplant I'll be happy to go halfsies with you if the handfuls of Xanax/moonshine havent wrecked mine too.

Thanks or takin this one for the team buddy.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 11:01 pm

8:21 PM — Huntsman notes that “America has a brand name around the world.”

We certainly do. In fact, 30% of Egyptians believe that "USA" is a brand of tear gas.

sati_demise November 23, 2011 at 2:48 am

KenLayIsAlive is on fire tonight.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 11:05 pm

8:38 PM — Mitt Romney’s reasons to stay in Afghanistan is that we’ve been there for a long time, and spent a lot of money there. Excellent reasoning, Mittens.

Hey, that's what I tried to say, but they still kicked me out of the bar at 4am.

fuflans November 22, 2011 at 11:21 pm

i for one am glad ken lay is still alive.

thanks for all your posting.

slowhansolo November 22, 2011 at 11:19 pm

Hi, everyone! I didn't watch TV tonight, or read these comments, and I've been drinking for hours. So! How's everyone doing? Should I feel irresponsible for tuning this shit out?

littlebigdaddy November 22, 2011 at 11:54 pm

You are right in my comfort zone, bra.

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:46 am

Blame it on the Black Man in the White House. That seemed to be the theme for the night.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 4:00 am

Should I feel irresponsible for tuning this shit out?
Only if you are personally responsible for whether the local liquor store stays in business or not. Otherwise, no worries.

fuflans November 22, 2011 at 11:20 pm

Rick Perry is going to stop drugs by … uh, Hugo Chavez, Hezbollah, Iran, Mexico, Paramount, etc.

rick darling, if you want a death match in hollywood, you choose disney.

Negropolis November 22, 2011 at 11:23 pm

My computer was acting up, so I'm just now getting here. All and all, I was kind of surprised by Newt, Michele and Santorum. Every once in awhile they'd come into focus and would say something lucid before they descended back into madness.

Perry was incoherent and stupid as usual. Mean as a snake, and self-aware as a sloth.

Romney's "I'm going to out-conservative the conservatives" is really starting to wear on me, as is his growing smugness. I'm not sure who is giving him advice on how to act in these things, but he better fire 'em.

After not being able to stand Huntsman, I'm starting to warm to the guy. I particularly liked when he kind of just totally dissed Romney with the "didn't you hear what I just said?" line or whatever he actually said.

Cain is totally through. Over. His stuck on stupid about concerning his insistence that the topography of Iran matters in anything is really kind of confusing.

Blah. BTW, why are they entertaining Paul Wolfowitz as if he's some kind of serious person, or entertaining him as anything other than a depraved criminal? That was the most surprising point of the debate. He comes up there as if he's some lowly head of some local organization.

Monsieur_Grumpe November 22, 2011 at 11:27 pm

"self-aware as a sloth"
You are insulting sloths. What did they ever do to you to deserve this?

littlebigdaddy November 22, 2011 at 11:53 pm

Sloth libel!

Negropolis November 22, 2011 at 11:28 pm

Oh, and BTW, for the millionth time, America, Africa is a fucking continent made up of multiple and very different countries and nations. Gawd.

johnnyzhivago November 22, 2011 at 11:29 pm

Forgot about this! Did I miss anything?

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:54 am

Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead. Other than that, no.

littlebigdaddy November 22, 2011 at 11:59 pm

I must admit that I watched college hoops. It sounds like I did not miss anything. One-L did not turn out to be an expert on western Asia, for example.

Biel_ze_Bubba November 23, 2011 at 12:27 am

One-L does not know that Asia has a western part.

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:52 am

They're all experts on East Asia. They love to panda to their audiences.

Sorry, folks, not enough to drink tonight. So shoot me. (But eat first, and then leave.)

Negropolis November 23, 2011 at 2:06 am

Of course, they'd all be experts on East Asia, because we've always been at war with East Asia…

littlebigdaddy November 23, 2011 at 12:07 am

That is a reverse-limbo bar though.

valgal2342 November 23, 2011 at 12:15 am

Why is that turkey disappearing into Ron Paul's pants?

El Pinche November 23, 2011 at 12:19 am

A bottle of Jameson & Finding Bigfoot marathon. That's tonight. Fuck these jive ass turkeys.

Suck My Balls November 23, 2011 at 12:32 am

I missed it. Did we bomb anyone?

Sassomatic November 23, 2011 at 12:49 am

"It’s going to be fun to watch all these motherfuckers hanged."

Taken out of context. this could be misunderstood.

coolhandnuke November 23, 2011 at 12:58 am

Breaking news: The Center for Disease Control has just released the results of Newt Gingrich's DNA. Newt's molecular structure is comprised of–a 30 gallon drum of cream of mushroom soup, a broken and battered rock-em-sockem robot, a more effete Barbara Bush, the gray teletubbie, a logic pretzel and every pompous "history" professor you wanted to kidney punch.

littlebigdaddy November 23, 2011 at 1:00 am

The biggest retard fest since the Texas Association of Fat Racist Retards' (TAFRR) annual convention in Laredo, TX.

wallygeorge November 23, 2011 at 1:32 am

We made a new political ad for Romney http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDxmiyX8XmI

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 2:02 am

Watching the re – run since I could not see it live: WTF with this intro? Is this a debate or an action flick?
CNN sucks…

Negropolis November 23, 2011 at 2:09 am

The only thing missing was a listing of height and weight. I swear they were hawking some MMA event.

Suck My Balls November 23, 2011 at 2:09 am

Nice pics of Bachmann and W! Is that Marcus in the purple pant suit?

Negropolis November 23, 2011 at 2:17 am

OT: The county health department did a surprise inspection on my city's local Occupy, yesterday, and shut down the Occupy kitchen. She didn't want any of the brave protestors to get a tummy ache, is pretty much the gist of what she said. She just cares so much about them, bless her heart. Coincidentially (not), the fire department shows up a few hours later and makes them takes their heaters away as a "fire hazard." I don't think they could be any clearer with their "Hippies go home" message.

Chichikovovich November 23, 2011 at 10:40 am

But this is absolutely not politically motivated. You know those huge wild gatherings of rowdy campers from all over the Midwest and even farther afield that spring up in Ann Arbor and East Lansing many Saturdays every fall? RVs and tents everywhere, clearly insufficient number of port-a-potties for a crowd that size, hundreds of space heaters around on cold days, all sorts of meats of uncertain origin cooking on dodgy looking hitachi's, rampant consumption of alcohol and open public intoxication, even occasional fistfights between members of rival gangs sporting their gang "colors" and furniture set on fire (well, that last one only happens in East Lansing)? They'll be shuttin' em down. With armored, helmeted, facemasked riot police dispensing pepper spray and other food products (mustard gas?) if necessary. Because the state, county and city authorities care about health, fire safety and public order, and nothing but. Incorruptible, they are.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 2:32 am

OT. MrLimeylizzie just called from LA, it is 2.30 am EST, Neville has returned after an 11 hour absence! I am now weeping with joy, thanks to all Wonketteers who send messages of solidarity!

emmelemm November 23, 2011 at 2:47 am

Is that your kitty cat?

ETA: I was reading the comments from new to old… duh…

Glad he's back!

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 6:14 am

Yes, my big orange darling.

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 3:12 am

Awwww!!! I am so happy to hear your good news. Sleep well!

DahBoner November 23, 2011 at 7:17 am

The cat came back.

The very next day.

You thought he was a goner, but…

finallyhappy November 23, 2011 at 7:32 am

yeah!. Good new!. We get listserve notices about cats and dogs in our neighborhood who have strayed and then generally turn up in a favored neighbor's yard- one who keeps food out for their own pet.

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 8:03 am

Yay! Thanks for the update.

ThundercatHo November 23, 2011 at 11:54 am

Glad to hear that Neville has returned unscathed. He is probably just resentful of your absence. BTW, we've made a donation to the Afghan animal assistance org. you recommended, it sounds as if they do wonderful work. Also, too I have an idea for a movie: a "Twilight" sequel in which you get to play the nanny for the baby girl vampire and swat Taylor Laughtner on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper and then, of course, teach him what doggie-style really means.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 12:10 pm

Oh how lovely , they do amazing work, one of the soldiers and his dog will be on Jon Stewart soon, Jon paid for the cost of getting the dog home. I love the idea of swatting Taylor on the nose, I would also be ok with kicking him in the balls.

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 1:54 pm

Yay, it's always good mews news when the wandering animals come home! Did your hubbie check to see if Neville had any new hickies?

Pat_Pending November 23, 2011 at 2:38 am

It's times like this that make me glad I canceled cable, so I can just watch back-to-back episodes of Breaking Bad all night…

Callyson November 23, 2011 at 3:40 am

JFC, I'm going to have to do AA by the time this primary is over…

bflrtsplk November 23, 2011 at 5:06 am

Uh, Ken, to these shit stains on the underwear of humanity, Israel is Disneyland.

DahBoner November 23, 2011 at 7:06 am

The reason why Ron Paul hates the Patriot Act is because it would have stopped a White, Christian, Conservative Terrorist from having "fun" blowing up a bunch of babies in Oklahoma City…

freakishlywrong November 23, 2011 at 7:27 am

Weird, the President gave a fiery, populist speech yesterday, calling out Teapublicans and all that's on my teevee this a.m. are assholes "debating" and pundits "analyzing. Nary a peep on the speech. Hmm..

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 8:16 am

OT For those Wonketteers who were concerned about my Neville, here is is, the orange one.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/13152388@N00/6388873

BaldarTFlagass November 23, 2011 at 8:21 am

Man, I missed the whole evolution. Glad to hear your cat came back, Liz. Maybe we can all have a Wonk-fest some day and everyone can pet your kitty.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 8:53 am

Um, that would be nice?

vulpes82 November 23, 2011 at 8:24 am

I like Fiona.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 8:28 am

She is unbelievable! Found on the El tracks in Chicago at 4 weeks old, has a very strong sense of self and adores my husband with a passion.

vulpes82 November 23, 2011 at 9:34 am

She just looks like she's a scrapper and brooks no nonsense.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 9:56 am

She rules the roost, no doubt, she weighs about 9 lbs and Neville weighs 18 lbs and is not fat , just enormous and she terrifies him.

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 8:28 am

So glad. Dang li'l varmints! Why oh why do we love them so?

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 8:31 am

Because they do not judge us. Actually Fiona does judge me and I come up wanting .

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 8:32 am

I love your Jack Russell.

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 11:11 am

Oh — that's no Jack Russell, that's my pit bull/hound dog mongrel, straight from the local shelter! She'll be flattered by your compliment, though.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 11:20 am

She is beautiful, I love those rescue animals, they are always just so happy to have some love.

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 8:36 am

Nice Blingee, by the way. Who's the turkey-head? Oh I know I know, all of 'em Katie!

Hurricane Ali November 23, 2011 at 9:19 am

The Blingee is mesmerizing. That is all.

Crowe2011 November 23, 2011 at 10:17 am

A vote for Rick Santorum is a vote for preventing Bolivian socialists and Egyptian Salafists from teaming up? Good news – they're not going to. Saved yourself a vote there.

BornInATrailer November 23, 2011 at 10:22 am

It so depressing that I want Ron Paul to win out of this pack of shitheads. Gonna be time to register Republican for 20min and vote for Dr. Feelgood (again).

HempDogbane November 22, 2011 at 9:31 pm

It's been a couple years, can't remember names. Friends work there. This is definitely Laura territory.

Maman November 22, 2011 at 9:33 pm

If you get a chance to ask them, let me know! Always prefer personal recommendations.

KenLayIsAlive November 22, 2011 at 10:57 pm

"How is it that we've sunk so low as a political culture that this kind of venomous lie can be heard without being shouted down?"

I don't know how we got here either. It's like waking up in jail after a blackout. I'm guessing.

littlebigdaddy November 22, 2011 at 11:56 pm

Wait a second…I thought Santorum was a frothy mixture of lube and feces? Can he also be the stupidest man in the senate? I mean, after all, Rand Paul everyone!

Geminisunmars November 23, 2011 at 1:23 am

That is how I view the repubs. But I have to say that watching the clip this evening of Obama actually listening and responding to a "Mic Check" in NH gave me the old tingly winglies. I can't give that man up. Yah, we wanted more and better from him, but at least he is sane.

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 7:59 am

"this kind of venomous lie can be heard without being shouted down"

Well, no one applauded it at least, did they? So! Lower we can go.

Chet Kincaid November 23, 2011 at 9:48 am

I'll say it again, Huntsman is doing this for 2016, after the Republican Party has imploded from terminal idiocy.

flamingpdog November 22, 2011 at 11:34 pm

On your way to Oregon, check out the wineries in Western Colorado. These days they're growing some fine grapes around Grand Junction where they used to grow peach and apple trees.

But they're still growing plenty of apple and peach trees in those parts because it's easier to hide the marijuana patch in among the trees.

anniegetyerfun November 23, 2011 at 12:06 am

Saracens in Sonora!

Negropolis November 23, 2011 at 12:12 am

Shit in Shinola!

Er…um…

Caliphate in Cancun and Sufis in Saltillo!

user-of-owls November 23, 2011 at 12:15 am

Zawahari en Zacatecas!

anniegetyerfun November 23, 2011 at 12:16 am

Hijab in Honduras?

flamingpdog November 23, 2011 at 12:44 am

Rick passed on the Crown of Cretin to Randy Paul after the Pennsylvanians gave Rick the heave-ho.

Pat_Pending November 23, 2011 at 2:40 am

Party in Your Pants! Everybody's Comin'! (Oh, Herman…)

ProgressiveInga November 23, 2011 at 8:02 am

Yay! So glad to hear the good news. My 24-year old daughter keeps coming back, too, even though I've moved twice. Cats and kids will not be denied……

Happy Thanksgiving, LL.

Dok-cupy Everything November 23, 2011 at 9:20 am

Huzzah for the big ginger doofus! Mitt Romney will now release a campaign ad accusing Obama of insufficient action on Operation Neville.

Chet Kincaid November 23, 2011 at 9:32 am

Oh thank goodness! One of our two cats is formerly-feral as well, and after a few attempts to reason with him, we cannot let him go outside anymore. The last time he snuck out, he made a bee-line for the doghouse of a neighbor's pitbull, and if we hadn't raised a ruckus before the old mutt spotted him in there, he'd have been a goner.

user-of-owls November 23, 2011 at 11:32 am

Hallelujah!! See? There is a secret Help-A-Cat-Home neural network! And it works!!

Monsieur_Grumpe November 23, 2011 at 8:59 am

Yay!
(bad link?)

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 9:11 am
Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 9:28 am

It wouldn't surprise me, but Neville is a Progressive.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 9:36 am

Our house in LA is in the hills and we have coyotes just meandering along the street on a regular basis, so I am always freaked out if Neville escapes.

Maman November 23, 2011 at 10:53 am

Thanks! will do

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 11:45 am

Must be, although it would need to be a really strong one for our Neville, somewhat remedial of a feline, so your, obviously, intelligent cat must have been in charge.

MzNicky November 23, 2011 at 11:46 am

Thanks lizzie! She's a big spoiled baby, just like the rest of my critters. I agree, I think shelter-adoptees somehow understand that you've saved their lives and they worship you like a goddess. Well, the dogs do anyway. The cats, eh, they know they've done you a favor.

user-of-owls November 23, 2011 at 12:47 pm

You're an actress, old thing. You more so than anyone should recognize that Neville only plays dumb. He gets much more lovin' that way.

Nothingisamiss November 23, 2011 at 3:07 pm

Limey, I'm so glad. I had to dig through this thread to make sure.

Limeylizzie November 23, 2011 at 3:14 pm

Oh thanks, yes he came home, not a whisker out of place, I made MrLimeylizzie check him all over for wounds, bites etc, but all he wanted to do was curl up with his Fiona.

James Michael Curley November 25, 2011 at 2:43 am

My penguin was a little greasy this year. How was yours?

Chet Kincaid November 25, 2011 at 10:27 am

Unmagnified, your avatar could be a polar bear…do you like Coke in the bottle?

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