let the kochblock begin

Cyber Weasels Try To Shut Down Scott Walker Recall Website

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Runnin' scared.Hooray, today Wisconsinites begin their campaign to Restore Decency and kick demon prince Scott Walker off his throne! This will Not Be Easy: the Kochsucker King is legally allowed to raise infinite campaign monies to defend himself against the recall, and organizers also have a massive task in collecting the required half million signatures in just sixty days. But Walker and his perverse thugs are still terrified about the possibility of defeat, so a “mysterious” cabal of cyber criminals launched an attack to shut down the website of recall organizer United Wisconsin the day before the start of the petition drive. Subtle!

Here’s the statement from United Wisconsin, via Daily Kos:

Early this afternoon, United Wisconsin’s website www.unitedwisconsin.com, was the victim of a cyber attack. It appears this attack may be ongoing. Our web team reports that this attack was coordinated and deliberate.

The attack, which is known as a Distributed Denial of Service Attack, flooded our servers at approximately 2:00pm. At this time the source of this attack is not fully known. However, we are reporting this to the FBI and Wisconsin Attorney General, and taking all the steps we can to ensure this does not happen again.

But Evil Loses, this time, and the website is now back up. Meanwhile, the cheese people gathered in their ritual houses of Monday Night Football worship to double the fun for the midnight recall kick-off:

The crowd at Hawk’s Bar and Grill in downtown Madison was decent for a Monday night football game viewing. The Green Bay Packers had just cinched a win over the Minnesota Vikings and a small cheer went up from a clutch of people gathered at the end of the bar where a large projection screen had been showing the game.

As the minutes ticked by and midnight approached, however, the number of people who packed into the building doubled, tripled, and more – eventually filling the space in a wall-to-wall scrum of cheering, energized Wisconsinites.

Ha ha, Scott Walker will now try to outlaw football gatherings of more than two people at a time without a state-issued license. Good luck, doomed idiot! [Daily Kos/NPR/Dane101.com]


Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • nounverb911

    When do the internet police clear out #OccupytInternet?

  • Not_So_Much

    Surprising. I figured his bunch would only be sophisticated enough to shoot their own laptops repeatedly. You know, to protect the second amendment.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Aaron Rodgers for Governor!!

    • chicken_thief

      If were only half as good at being a governor as he is at being a quarterback, he'd still be twice as good as whoever was in 2nd place.

  • freakishlywrong

    If fucking conservatives were so popular, they wouldn't have to resort to low-life, fucking conservative tactics. Who voted for these assholes? I voted against them.

    • Devilette

      Not enough of us voting against assholes. We need to up our numbers. GTVO!!!

    • WhatTheHolyHeck

      But they must cling to power by any means necessary. For democracy!

      Like how some of these gaptoothed cheesefuckers publicized in advance their intent to commit a felony by distributing their own fake petitions to recall Walker so they could throw away the signatures. Real bunch of populists up there.

    • OneDollarJuana

      Remember, intelligence and common sense lie on a bell curve. Just as many mouth-breathers as critical thinkers.

      And the Right Wing fixes the elections.

    • grex1949

      Me, too.

    • poncho_pilot

      everyone knows why. that's why it annoys me a lot, the "politeness" of the "liberal" media. thanks, guys. keep fucking that chicken.

  • BarackMyWorld

    They hate us for our freedom.

  • fredbell

    "He may seem to be reasonable, but Aaron Rodgers is not one of us"

  • SorosBot

    How the fuck is this shitbrain not in jail yet?

    • Chichikovovich

      The Wisconsin Attorney General (J.B. Van Hollen – Republican) is getting right on it. Right after he finishes dealing with the epidemic of voter fraud from students, dead people and Canadians sneaking across the border. (According to his Wikipedia page, he's already launched at least one lawsuit reflecting his deep concern that "An election could potentially be decided by illegal votes". That is, the focus-group tested, Koch approved boilerplate for "we need to start disenfranchising groups that vote Democratic".)

      • horsedreamer_1

        The Lying Dutchman van Hollen needs to crawl back to the sulphur-scented Fox Valley hovel from which he emerged.

  • ttommyunger

    Seems a guy has to get caught buggering a ten year-old boy in the locker room to motivate the masses in his defense. Upon realizing this, Governor Walker exclaimed: "I'm up for that!".

    • chicken_thief

      Then added: "again…."

      • ttommyunger

        Good one!

        • Gleem_McShineys

          That's what he said!

          Too soon?

          • ttommyunger


    • flamingpdog

      Wait a minute, I'm confused. I always thought Sandusky was in Ohio, but the news reports the last few days have been saying it's in Pennsylvania, and now you're saying it's in Wisconsin? This continental drift thingie is getting out of hand

      • ttommyunger

        Virus is spread by visual contact with Faux News.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Won't they just break out the DieBold machines and record the recall votes as votes to keep Walker? That's how they win the regular elections, isn't it?

    I swear, wingnutz are such a bunch of bedwetters.

    • Millennial Malaise

      That's the only explanation I can think of for both Scotts' "rise" to power. I know Florida isn't the sharpest state in the union, but one tiny contract with the Devil and a couple of "refurbished" vote counting machines later, Rick Scott bought himself a governorship!

    • Fukui_sanYesOta

      No, no, they have ace election operative Kathy Nickolaus. That woman who "finds" votes on her computer.

      I honestly have no idea why she isn't in jail.

      • not that Dewey

        Because she didn't guess Sarah Palin's email password. If she had done that, she'd be in jail. As it is, she merely subverted democracy.

    • GOPCrusher

      It would be too obvious when George Bush is elected President of Wisconsin.

  • http://www.scribd.com/doc/71923813 4TheTurnstiles

    Liberate Leinenkugel!

    • horsedreamer_1

      MillerCoors, which owns Leinenkugel, is one of Scooter's biggest (non-construction) industry donors, and the Leinenkugel family are typical, Birchy Upstate Wisconsin Falangists, so, fuck 'em. Drink Ranger IPA instead.

      • PubOption

        Is this a plot to have the craft-beer-loving liberals finance their own downfall? You claim the Leinenkugels are Birchers, and I know that Schlafly Brewery is owned by Phyllis Schlafly's nephew.

      • grex1949

        One of the Leinenkugels contemplated a run against Russ Feingold, but bowed out before the primary. That's how Wisconsin (and the nation) Johnson'ed in the last election.

        • horsedreamer_1

          Granted, if our Senator were Dick Leinenkugel, the writing of Wonkette posts would be Madlib easy, so it would have been a decent enough outcome. Less time Wonking would have allowed Kirsten to finish her novel, Remembrance of Things Reposado.

      • http://www.scribd.com/doc/71923813 4TheTurnstiles

        Hence my call to liberate the fucking Leinenkugel. At least the summer wheat. It's cheap but it's tasty.

  • Redrighthand

    Just like the start of "the empire strikes back"…

  • johnnymeatworth

    Maybe we can get United Wisconsin to click on that "Do you want better broadband?" ad below this story?

    After we ascertain that they enjoy their vegetables as much as Kortney, of course….

    • Chichikovovich

      (No snark): I must say that broadband rent-a-post, and the pages it links to, are virtuoso pieces of corporate-speak. Page after page of blather that has the effect of making you feel vaguely favorable about the project and the companies involved with it, without ever telling you what the hell it is, apart from the fact that it has something to do with broadband, and it will make your life a million times better in unspecified ways that involve purportedly better broadband.

      • poncho_pilot

        are you now also interested in a monorail?

        • Dok-cupy Everything

          Wouldn't want that to pass that up and let Shelbyville get it!

      • http://wonkette.com/ FlownOver

        Seriously, this is more spew from Big Cell. All they want is more free spectrum from the (sociamalist) Gubmint so they can charge & profit more. The'l let us know if/when they decide to spend any of their own $20B/yr profits improving their piss-poor service.

        • Chichikovovich

          Thanks – I was hoping somebody had the secret decoder ring. Now if they had just said upfront "This is more spew from Big Cell. We want more free spectrum, giving nothing in return unless we feel like it" I would have saved time and I would be much less annoyed.

  • freakishlywrong

    I also read somewhere that a passel of wingtards were posting on Facebook that they're collecting signatures and burning/shredding them. Yes, it's a felony and yes, they posted it all on Facebook.

    • OzoneTom

      Some of his fans did kick off a fake recall a week early so that he had more time to take infinite moneyz. Wouldn't be surprised if these weren't the same yahoos.

      • freakishlywrong
        • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

          The FB comments show a lot of maturity and moral fiber ("Kiss my fucking ass" for example), which is exactly what you'd expect from the party of "personal responsibility and family values"…

          • freakishlywrong

            Whew! I'm glad you added the caveat: "personal responsibility and family values"… because I say "kiss my fucking ass" instead of "good morning" these days..

        • elviouslyqueer

          Oh, that is delicious reading. And, um, "Will R. Jenkins"? I can guarantee you that the knock you hear at the door Saturday night isn't from your friendly neighborhood Jehovah's Witnesses.

        • horsedreamer_1

          Had to get the story from that national magazine, and not Dave Umhoefer & Tom Kertscher's Dream Journal. Sad, really. A once proud paper reduced to being the employer newsletter of the Posse Comitatus.

    • http://wonkette.com TanzbodenKoenig

      Haha, and its the scary browns that we should be afraid of voter fraud from?

      • NorthStarSpanx

        It's pretty goddamn funny that they are going through such effort and ritual to cut their noses off to spite their faces.

    • Nesnora

      I thought they only burned books, huh.

  • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

    "The attack, which is known as a Distributed Denial of Service Attack"

    Oh, "Distributed Denial" indeed…

    • Devilette

      interesting wording to say the least.

    • flamingpdog

      And if they do it again, it will be a Redistributed Denial of Service Attack.

  • jus_wonderin

    Republicans as weasels? Well, duh.

  • littlebigdaddy

    I'd like to see Clay Matthews sack his ass!

  • Dok-cupy Everything

    Thank you for not calling this "hacking." A DDOS can be launched by any moron who wants to be a pain in the virtual ass, uses the googles, and is willing to use a botnet. Illegal, yes, sophisticated, no.

    • Biff

      My guess is it was even less high tech than that. Some wingnut radio "personality" puts out the word, and the minions get to work.

    • memzilla

      I'm willing to bet that United Wisconsin's server logs are even now being parsed into xml evidence. and will be posted on the site within 24 hours.

      I'm also willing to bet that the DDoS attack didn't anonymize itself well enough to prevent its source from being discovered.

      And from a COINTELPRO standpoint, it would really be sweet if the DDoS attackers intentionally left some fingerprints pointing toward the people who paid for it to happen.

      Take Koch Bruddahs munniez, pretend to do a job, and leave enough evidence to indict the originators? Oh HELLZ yes. I'd do it. You'd do it. With a smile.

  • hagajim

    I'll bet the Kochsucker hired some Indians to do that dirty work for him. Chickenshit!

    • Guppy

      He's a job creator!

    • Chichikovovich

      Ah, good observation. That would also put them conveniently out of the reach of Federal investigators.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Walker the Weasel got 52% of the vote … and that was before he took off the mask. The guy's going down in flames, and he knows it, and his supporters know it – hence the panic. Dirty tricks and cheating are the only options left, and they have no compunction about using them.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Hope you're right. I'm going to PayPal the good guys another $20.

      I love being the Big Money Out of State Interests meddling in Wisconsin's affairs.

    • Chichikovovich

      Very true. And they have their eye on the big prize too: union busting nationwide. Kasich has already been hit with one humiliating defeat on this one. The Wisconsin senate recalls were another. If Walker gets recalled – not just voted out in a normal cycle but recalled – other Republicans will start backing away even faster from this particular coordinated Koch initiative.

      • Guppy

        That would require Republicans feeling shame.

        • Chichikovovich

          Oh, I'm not suggesting they feel shame. Just the survival instinct that successful (and even most unsuccessful) politicians possess. Make it clear that something is electorally a big loser, and they'll fight like cornered ferrets to get away from it.

          • Guppy

            I still think you're underestimating their cognitive dissonance. Many of them really did drink the Kool-Aid and believe that any election day losses are solely the results of ACORN voter fraud.

      • GOPCrusher

        You give them too much credit. I think it will just inflame more anti-left hate rhetoric and conspiracy theories.

        • Chichikovovich

          I think that will be true of Republicans generally. Maybe some people running for office too. But professional politicians are pragmatists, when it comes to actually getting elected. Though it is true that this tendency may have been softened somewhat on the Republican side by the Koch/Scaife etc. types discovery that people become much less worried about losing elections if they know they have sugar daddies who will make sure they are paid even better as a lobbyist or (ahem) "think tank" space-filler.

  • PuckStopsHere

    They HAD to shut it down. The Internet is NOT in the CONSTTUTION. Wake up sheeple, etc…

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    They have computers in Wisconsin?

    • Chichikovovich

      How else can you get streaming video of Packers games if the broadcast is blacked out? And get complete stats for your fantasy football team in real time?

    • OccupytheDashboard

      They do, but they're pretty cheesy.

      • Lionel[redacted]Esq

        That's what I figured. I thought between the spilled beer and cheese sauce, they all would be out of commission in seconds.

    • flamingpdog

      Lots of cows in Wisconsin.

  • qwerty42

    So, does Hawk’s Bar and Grill serve such Wisconsin staples as deep fried cheese curds?

    • http://www.vinoverve.com Maman

      duh. and walleye

    • GOPCrusher

      And PBR.

    • lochnessmonster

      I don't think you can get a liquor license with out them on the menu in WI!

  • paris biltong

    Wow. Wisconsin. Weird. One-time home for left-wing intellectuals (some of whom later became neocons, but that's another story).

  • Nostrildamus

    Unchain the Honey Badger !!!

    • RadiosTyrone

      Thanks for the comment, stupid…see ya' later.

  • An_Outhouse

    Lieberman's incompetent campaign staff claimed sabotage when they forgot their password one time. I don't think the Kochs are that competent and the old geezers probably don't know what a web site is. Some times a 'cyber attack' is just someone bumping the power strip.

  • chicken_thief

    Who would be fucking dumb enough to fund the battle on behalf of a sure loser? Why not just take half of what you are willing to spend on Scott the Douche and give it to the Dem running against him. It's not like Dems can't be bought, too.

  • Devilette

    Waiting for Saturday when family home to sign up.

  • Beetagger

    I'd love to see Scotty in jail as Blago's bitch.

    • freakishlywrong

      Not sure I'd like to actually SEE that, but I get your drift..

  • Poindexter718

    Leinenkugel libel!

    • horsedreamer_1

      I'd rather a Point Well Made.

    • not that Dewey

      They're kickin' it, Old Style.

  • Joshua Norton

    Scotty is getting more like the tweaking party guest nobody could remember inviting – the one who won't stop sweating and really, really wants to talk to you about the gold standard and some super duper compelling business opportunities involving the collapse of Western civilization.

  • DahBoner

    These cyber attack turkeys may never fly, but they still have time to buy a $9 fare on Spirit Airlines.


    • HogeyeGrex


      • Angry_Marmot

        "Note they do not so much fly, as plummet."

  • http://wonkette.com ShitFilledExistence

    DoS attack culprit? Kochnonymous.

  • http://wonkette.com/ slowhansolo

    Meh? Small potatoes once you've engineered a coup of the entire country.

  • Goonemeritus

    Why is the Republican parties go to response always anti-democratic? Disenfranchise voters, shut down free speech, attack web sites; there really is a pattern here. They teach dirty tricks to the college young Republicans and when they go out into society they think its it’s the way democracy works.

    • freakishlywrong

      Simple. They are assholes.

    • SorosBot

      Because they have no morals, but only care about winning; they're sociopaths.

      • Dok-cupy Everything

        They have to do all these things because ACORN and the Lamestream Media have so thoroughly rigged the system that it's no longer possible for the average everyday American to exercise his God-given right to elect people to transfer a greater portion of wealth to the top 1%.

    • RadiosTyrone

      And don't forget to habitually accuse the "left" of the same tactics.

    • Come here a minute

      "Dirty tricks" is far too nice a phrase for what the Republican stain on our society traffics in.

  • Baconzgood


    • Trannysurprise

      Your review of the situation is succinct and simple. I like it.

  • meatlofer

    "Hey mister Koch! Scottie is on the phone for you." "Scottie Walker?" "No,Scottie Tissue,he knows all the Assholes!"

  • Devilette

    Governor's Mansion is only 3 miles from his new home, Mendota Mental Institute.

    • mereoblivion

      And he's already committed to his cause (basically, contempt for everyone not like himself).

  • teebob2000

    Democracy Inaction.

  • PhilippePetain

    You know, one of the best things about the existence of republicans is that they're all arrogant and self satisfied and smug on the way up, and when people realize what they're up to and get pissed and animated, the republicans become the most hand-wringing, frightened little jerks on the planet. It's beautiful to behold, and Scott here will be no exception.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Hell, screw the hand-wringing. I want Scott to have a full-on, shit-his-pants, screaming Dance Mom tantrum. Caught on YouTube and made instantly viral, forever.

    • Dok-cupy Everything

      Don't forget the part where he whines about being persecuted.

  • horsedreamer_1

    Just drove thru the Old Money Episcopalian Enclave that is the de facto base for the Gov, and plenty of Recall signs in the yards.

    Guess he'll have to gin up the racial resentments in the Dirty Stallis, et. al., to make sure he wins.

  • DaRooster

    Fuck Scott Walker!
    I doubt there has ever been an Asshole I have ever wanted to punch in the face more than this guy… and I live in California. The Dick runs thick in this one…

  • Callyson

    From NPR:
    Wisconsin Democratic Party Chairman Mike Tate says petitioners will fan out in the state's 72 counties.
    "You're going to see them everywhere," he said. "You'll have people outside the parking lots of shopping malls over the holiday season. There will be people at the deer-cleaning stands during deer hunting."
    Scotty vs. deer hunters…I know what I'm betting the rent money on…

  • RadiosTyrone

    The hackers are probably college drop-outs.

  • MrFizzy

    Let's send in our secret weapon – Jerry Sandusky's horse.

  • owhatever

    He now must attack the union thugs that are the Green Bay Packers and pass a law to stop them from playing until they are free men.

    • poncho_pilot

      they'd fucking lynch him. which wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

  • Dumbedup

    The Kochs would (pay) to do this not for any love of Walker, but for the same reason they do anything, to send the message that they will have their way, and it's futile to resist with our quaint democratic institutions and protests. Wisconsin is a test model for the whole country, they are just perfecting the formula. A mob should drag those two fuckers out of their house naked and put them on trial.

    • DaRooster

      No way… not naked… and no trial either.

    • poncho_pilot

      they don't have to pay anyone to do this kind of thing. there are plenty of Breitbart-following types here who would do this for free. more Republican "humor".

  • Antispandex

    I guess, in the Fox News-Rush-O'Reilly-Koch universe the only way to make sure we keep our freedoms is to make sure that only certian people have them. How very neo-Federalist of them. Um, they do remember what happened to the first Federalist Party though, right?

  • http://wonkette.com/ Monsieur_Grumpe

    This going to get ugly (er).

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    Really, Wonkette – will you PLEASE stop giving the Weasle such a bad name here!!!

    • poncho_pilot

      i think Carp might be more apt.

      • Rotundo_

        Carp are more personable than Scooter. I guess I would consider him more tapeworm-like. Hookworm maybe?

        • user-of-owls

          Whoa, there. Even the lowly hookworm has standards, as we saw in the case of Palin…oops. I stepped in it there, that's for sure.

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    C4n U t33cH m3 h0w 2 h4x0R?

    • Dok-cupy Everything

      U R 50 L337!!!!!

    • horsedreamer_1

      Is it easier than how to Douglas?

  • not that Dewey

    Natl_indecency_cmndr: Come back! We need you!

  • fitley

    Cheezers, please, please, please keep your eye on that crazy twat in Waukeshau who keeps on finding thousands of missing Repubtard ballots in her oversize pantyhose.

    • Rotundo_

      Waukesha is kind of a lost cause anyhow. Fascist territory in them parts y'know. If they had trains, the fuckers would run on time, every time.

  • http://littlegreenfootballs.com/article/39308_Breitbarts_Fans_Spew_Racism_Call_for_President_Obama_t glamourdammerung

    Yet another instance of conservatives being afraid of that "marketplace of ideas" nonsense they spew.