'And I'm telling you, Nobama, at the top of my lungs!'Barack Obama’s administration has been, uhm, terrible when it comes to environmental issues. Not that he ever had any kind of “environmental record” beyond believing some coal industry press release about a fantasy form of fuel called “clean coal,” but the assumption had (wrongly) been that a Liberal Democrat might be somewhat sympathetic to the environmental concerns of, say, the vast majority of Americans. (Even Republican voters overwhelmingly support policies that protect the air we breathe, water we drink, etc.) But as we have learned over the past three years, the Obama Administration has been pretty Meh on the environment. Good thing the whole world isn’t melting, hahaha. ANYWAY, now the White House has caved to the environmental groups on this whole Keystone Tar Sands Filthy Death Pipeline, because we’re now officially within a year of the election, and nobody votes like the environmental people, unless they’ve been repeatedly shit on by the supposed Liberal Democrat administration.

The NRDC just put out this release:

The People have prevailed over Big Oil!

Today, the White House announced that it will NOT be approving the Keystone XL tar sands pipeline as most observers expected. Instead, the State Department will undertake a new and thorough review of the pipeline‚Äôs true environmental costs — exactly what you and I have been calling for all along.

Wow, is that all The People wanted, a bullshit environmental review by the same people who already pre-approved this thing? We thought the idea was to stop the Keystone XL poison hell pipe. The CNN wire story makes it a little more clear:

Bowing to public pressure, the Obama administration said Thursday it will delay a decision on the controversial Keystone oil sands pipeline expansion until at least 2013.


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  • meatlofer

    Clean Coal? = Smart Texan?

  • nounverb911

    "The People have prevailed over Big Oil!"
    Now if Obama could just somehow stop Coca-Cola from filling the Grand Canyon with empty water bottles.

    • datateday

      And you know who once headed Coca-Cola don't you?

  • memzilla

    Koch-blocked! Lucy pulled the football away again!

    • Not_So_Much

      Charles and David will be blowing off some steam over this disappointment by torturing some kittens later tonight.

      • flamingpdog

        Or maybe their own personal house cat, Herman Cain?

        • horsedreamer_1

          He's not heavy. He's their brother.

        • Negropolis

          Or maybe his own personal house staff.

  • Koch blocked! Sort of.

  • CapnFatback

    Bowing to public pressure, the Obama administration said Thursday it will delay a decision on the controversial Keystone oil sands pipeline expansion until at least 2013

    Yeah, but by then I'll be paying fifteen cents more for my Christmas trees.

  • UnholyMoses

    Who the hell is this "Liberal Democrat"?

    I ask because, according to things such as "history," "facts," and "reality," we have a moderate republican as President.


  • Pragmatist2

    Shitting on people is not bad for the environment. Shit is actually fully biodegradable.

    • memzilla

      So are Rick Perry's presidential chances.

    • arihaya

      shit actually played important role in Ancient Egypt, and scarab beetle rolling shit displayed prominently in their arts

  • Not_So_Much

    Stand by for GOP drones to call him a tree-fucking liberal, hippy ass-licker who is killing jerbs because he won't pave ANWAR in 3….2….

  • edgydrifter

    Next up:
    BP to investigate Deepwater Horizon incident
    Charles Manson to preside over his own parole hearing
    Goldman Sachs announces it will audit itself

  • north_of_moscow

    Ixnay on the ipelinepay talk. You might wake up alinPay.

  • barto

    I for one would approve this pipeline if the unplugged end was in the Koch Bros. living room (or jail cell, God willing).

  • I'm sure Herman Cain supports laying some pipe.

    What is this pipe except something that full of gas — like Newt.

    Mmmm … tar sands … I'm getting hungry just saying it.

  • Goonemeritus

    What the hell we need to take the win. After all you make it sound like rescheduling the repeated ass rape of mother nature by a whole year isn't shiny.

  • chascates

    And when we've reelected him Obama will try to be bipartison and approve the pipeline deal. And then allow the EPA to be defunded. And then continue to be painted as a socialist.

    • emmelemm

      Always look on the bright side of life, amirite?

      (I'm not disagreeing with anything you've said, btw.)

  • arihaya

    Republicans yelling "job-killing Obama's policy" in 3 … 2 .. 1 ..

  • TheGyrus

    Ah, the famous "Make it President Romney's problem" switcheroo!

  • ChernobylSoup

    Late afternoon before the start of a holiday weekend news dump much?

    • SorosBot

      Holiday? What do you work for the government? Nobody else gets off.

      • MightySix

        Buncha banks are closed. They get Veterans Day off so the Exec VPs can roll around nude atop piles of crispy green cash. Money fight!

      • flamingpdog

        I work for the government and I haven't gotten off in years. But we do have holidays.

    • It's the *other* kinda getting off, pdog.

      Geez, whatta buncha fuckin' sluts.

  • SayItWithWookies

    "Given the concentration of concerns regarding the environmental sensitivities of the current proposed route through the Sand Hills area of Nebraska, the Department has determined it needs to undertake an in-depth assessment of potential alternative routes in Nebraska," the State Department said in a Statement.

    Okaaaay — so they're not concerned that extracting oil from tar sands will create an environmental disaster in North America or anything — they're worried about the route the pipeline's going to take. So don't celebrate yet — State's just going to be doing some nitpicking over which parts of America get to be disfigured.

    • flamingpdog

      I vote for running it through Ben Nelson's house.

      • SayItWithWookies

        They better avoid his face — that thing's craggier than Snake River Canyon, and the permitting would be a nightmare. Other than that, I'd be fine with it.

  • Reportedly the Canadians are desperate to get this pipeline. Why is that? What happened to the myth of the reasonable and sensible Canucks, embarrassed by the antics and policies to the south? IS IT ALL A SHAM?!

    • flamingpdog

      "Canada? Why would I want to leave America just to visit America, Jr.?"
      – Homer Simpson

      • I phrased snarkily, but it's a serious question.

        • DoktorThompson

          Yes, because, deep down, everyone loves the taste of money.

    • Negropolis

      Because, despite their appearances, Canada is still very much dependant upon its natural resources for economic growth. That, and the oil sands exist in a rather conservative part of that country, and their government has been pretty much teabagger-lite for quite a few years.

      I always try to give the benefit of the doubt to new technologies, but the production of tar sands is probably one of the nastiest environmental messes I've ever read about. The process — particularly from an aerial view — looks like something straight out of some Star Wars wasteland planet. From a purely visual perspective, it's even more ugly than mountain top removal, IMO.

  • USA, USA, USA.
    Barry will finesse this hysteria by leaving all the poopy-poop pollutants in Alberta, burning the oil in the Midwest, and then raining all the CO2-pooply acid rain on Ontario and Noofie. Canada reaps most of the profits and gets to keep the returnz.

    Nothing up this sleeve, and nothing…

  • Lascauxcaveman

    Yeah, I don't trust Barry O'bummer on this any farther than I can throw him.

    I'm still not voting for Mitt in '12.

  • NorthStarSpanx

    Clean coal is about as refreshing as a dip in fracking-laced waters.

    • SorosBot

      In some of the communities hit by fracking, people can now light their water on fire. That's got to be perfectly safe to drink and bathe in!

      • Fukui_sanYesOta

        Light, heat AND water? I smell a water company price hike on the way!

        • You smell something all right, and I'd worry about what it wuz if I wuz you.

      • flamingpdog

        Clean and energy!

      • But look at the BRIGHT side, SorosBot! Soon we'll ALL be able to light our farts! Maybe even read by them. Energy problem solved, kinda.

        I mean, those hobo beans make great fuel, right?

    • Well, the water does tingle after the fracking. That is good, right?

  • LeAlbatross

    All the way to 2013, huh? Gee, that'd be what…two months after the election? Good thing it isn't a ploy or anything…Christ, I thought he was a Democrat.

    • He IS. But he also wants to win. Given that we've had a fucking shitload of Democrats who are ever so nice but can't seem to win in a fight with boiled noodles, I expected everyone who ever complained about spineless Dems would be thrilled.

      Now, this does not mean I agree with him on everything. In actual fact, I agree with him on very little. It's just that I don't see anyone else who could do what he's doing, even if he's not doing everything I want him to do. At least he's not assraping us, stabbing us to death, pissing on our corpses, and then flinging them into a sludge-filled tarpit and shitting all over them, which is pretty much what we've come to expect from our politicians since, oh, I dunno, Reagan?

      Barry is just the first salvo in a lengthy and protracted war if we want to keep this country from turning into a fascist hellhole, which it's trembling on the edge of. I'm still hoping he'll turn out to be less disappointing in his second term, but it's him or mass suicide at this point because jeebus god if anyone believes ANY of the Republicans can, or will, or wants to, get us out of this mess, well, they're plain fucking delusional.

  • stopthemovie

    Herman Cain responds. Herman Cain is always in favor of laying pipe!

    • Is Hermie still saying no to that job offer at Penn State?

      • stopthemovie

        looking to Mount Saint Mary's

    • Herman Cain is in favour of laying anyone or thing that will let him.

      • flamingpdog

        Man on dog? Damn, where have I heard that one?

        • Not from me, dood. I haz more respect for teh doggies than to accuse them of such shenanigans.

  • LeAlbatross

    The worst part is, he's the only choice, as a third-party idiot would ensure President Romney. Goddamnitsomuch!

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Not if that third party was a Xtian Tea Bagger.

      If one doesn't pop up spontaneously after Mitt gets the nod, I think the Dems would do well to finance one.

      • HistoriCat

        You're not talking about the Democratic Party are you? Because they would not stoop to are incapable of pulling off such tactics.

        • Well, every time Barry tries, Dems jump nine ways to Sunday all over him.

  • littlebigdaddy

    Interestingly, it seems to be objections from enviros in Nebraska of all fucking places that sunk the deal.

  • not that Dewey

    Does it spew Shale Tar Ice Lime? Do the dead pelicans on the label turn blue when it's at just the right temperature? I am so down with this new pipeline.

    • CapnFatback

      I hate this laptop. I just deleted my comment, which read as follows:

      But in a nod to the right, construction has begun on a Keystone Light pipeline.

      Got it?

      • not that Dewey

        I already had it. No worries. I was lamely attempting to riff on that theme.

        • CapnFatback

          No, no, loved your riff. The "Got it" was my lame attempt to yell "Get off my lawn" to this Dell stand-in until I get my new Macbook.

          • not that Dewey

            Please be more explicit in the future when you're yelling at your computer. My boss has the office next door and quite often pokes his head in to find out who I'm yelling at, only to discover that it was the computer.

            Sorry, we're all a little edgy here about this thing tomorrow. Intramural basketball was cancelled on account of terrorism. Classes and work tomorrow are "optional".

            Soon, we'll all be standing on our porches in our pajamas, shaking our fists at ourselves and imploring ourselves to get off our own lawns.

          • CapnFatback

            Be safe, my friend. No snark.

          • not that Dewey

            Thanks. We're giving ourselves the day off and cuddling up with a nice, warm police/ham/emergency radio.

  • I live in the middle of the proposed route and have been bombarded by Transcanada ads for the last year. I'm gonna take a victory nap.

  • Wonderthing

    It's candy til the election, eat your goddamn spinach the day after.

    • While there might be corn in it, it is not going to be spinach.

  • EatsBabyDingos

    Mommy, why is Wilfred Brimley naked and why is he so hairy?

  • We've got freedom of choice in this country, people!

    Get fucked over by the corporate-owned bad cop (the GOP)


    Get fucked over by the corporate-owned good cop (Obama and company).

    Yeah, it's time. USA! USA! USA!

    Read all about it tomorrow in the liberal-biased Washington Post.

  • ttommyunger


    • DahBoner

      Or as Clinton called it, Kick the Can Down the Road…

      • ttommyunger


    • Hey! Some teabagger called Nancy Pelosi that today and …

      Oh. OK, then.

      • ttommyunger

        But did she answer?

        • You kidding? She ignored him, being a classy lady.

          • ttommyunger

            I'd do the same if he weren't so damn funny; in a gruesome kind of way. Kind of like Frankenstein joins the Three Stooges.

  • Which is it, Ken, "terrible" or "meh"? Also, you link to an article after calling it "terrible" that gives opinions on what he SHOULD do, not what he HAS done. It took me a couple minutes to Google up a whole bunch of views on their record (which collectively amount to "meh"):

    • That's meh?

      I'd sum up those links with, "Obama's environmental record is meh, if your standard is the horrible record of Bush and Cheney."

      And you forgot this one.

      • I was trying to be fair, by not picking just one article, or one that's a year and a half old. Neither was my point that Obama's record is just fine. I just don't appreciate careless slinging of shit without backup, and I am automatically skeptical of anything "Wonkette Jr." has to say about Obama.

        • ShaveTheWhales

          What, in your opinion, are the Administration's three best accomplishments regarding environmental protection in its three years so far?

          • Obviously, the fuel efficiency standards are the big one. Beyond that, I'm not an environmental expert or the designated Obama environment punching bag on this board.

    • Thanks, Chet.

  • DahBoner

    What does a pipe line have to do with Keith Stone???

    • EatsBabyDingos

      Dunno, but I'll mullet a while.

      • emmelemm

        I love the smell of an excellent pun in the afternoon.

  • BarackMyWorld

    Terrible oil companies are terrible and oily.

  • HedonismBot

    Another important government decision put off until, um, that magical day when politicians no longer have to worry about elections and attack ads.
    I've been toying with a semi-sort of serious idea, and would like to hear some input and opinions. Here's how it would work, following a Constitutional amendment: Every president would still serve a max eight years, but would only face one actual election.
    After four years, presidents would be subject to a "retention" election, similar to the way judges face retention elections in many parts of the country. If the voters choose not to retain the president, he or she would get the boot, and a partisan election would be held for a replacement.
    Without organized campaigns and a specific partisan opponent on the ballot, only the worst presidents would likely not be retained. This would make the president feel more free to make more consequential decisions. The Constitutional impeachment process could be made easier to balance this out for accountability.

    • HistoriCat

      Unless you have a plan to apply something similar to Congress critters, it won't make a huge difference.

      • HedonismBot

        And I am under no illusions that such changes would ever be enacted by our do-nothing government, but it's an interesting concept.

  • I recall a discussion about this very issue around here quite recently, complete with the usual hand wringing and condemnation of Obama as being W in blackface and general shitting of pants and the conviction that this whole thing was a done deal, so let's all just bitch and moan about it. Am I wrong?

    No, I'm correct:

    A few of us pointed out that all that had happened was that State had released an Environmental Impact Report, no final decision had been made, the EPA still had to review the EIR, and instead of pissing and moaning perhaps people could continue to protest, go to the scheduled public meetings in the affected states, lobby Congress, protest outside the WH when the president was actually there and not on vacation on Martha's Vineyard…you know, democracy-type shit. I for one was told in no uncertain terms that I was naive, that this pipeline had been an issue for years and Obama damn well knew about it, that releasing the EIR meant the whole thing was a done deal, that Obama was just lubing up the enviros before fucking the left up the ass yet again, yadda yadda yadda.

    But oh, lookie here, even Bill McKibben thinks the people who actually did engage in such activities made a difference:

    And what's the reaction at Wonkette? Pissing and moaning, the usual cynicism that Barry pushed this back until 2013 so he won't lose support of the environmentalists (pardon me, I assumed getting him to take this action for just that reason was the point?)

    Granted, he didn't outright kill the project. But this could be a first step in that direction IF the environmental lobby keeps up the pressure (again, see the piece by Bill McKibben linked above.) This is like a death-row reprieve the day before the execution. It also could maybe give a boost to the environmentalists up in Canada who are protesting the whole tar sands project to begin with, and who will now have to fight to keep the Canadian government from approving pipelines that go west instead of south, to the Pacific, which would involve passing through the Canadian Rockies and the unsullied wilderness there.

    Considering where we were two months ago, this is a pretty big fucking deal. Christ, some of the folks around here remind me of Heath Ledger's line in the last Batman movie about being a dog always chasing a car and then not having the first clue what to do when he catches it.

    • Oh, that was a fun one! The "tar baby" comment thread was so edifying!

      Anyway, thanks for posting the linked McKibben article. Earlier today, I remembered seeing in some of the coverage that this could effectively kill the project, and then couldn't find where I saw it.

    • DarwinianDemon

      Remember "Obama is doing nothing to help Libyans!" And "Obama is slaughering Libyans!!" In the same week? The post about Obama putting solar panels in that declared his environmental policy worse than Bush's? The one where it said Obama loved killing browns because he had congressional approval to send advisors to he'll fight the LRA?

      I must have read "Republicans pander to their base while Democrats hate theirs" about 10 times. Now it's "ZOMG Obama is pandering to his base".

      I love that rather than compare Obama to modern Republicans (the sanest of which, Jon Huntsman says the EPA cleaned the air and now its job is done), people use Teddy Rooseevelt or. Ike so they can say Obama is a moderate Republican. Can we stick with Republicans who are still living?

      • It's the fuel that keeps the political bloviation machine running, even here: wake up in the morning and ask what in the world can we let piss us off today? In what way are we fucked today? Life handed us lemonade, so we'll hold a quorum where we will debate forming a committee to study the efficacy of turning it back into lemons. Jazz fingers!

    • ShaveTheWhales

      I am one of the people who responded negatively to your assertion that the EIR had been done by lower-level folks in State, and therefore really didn't mean anything much. I confess I may have missed the comments where you were encouraging people to go to meetings and protest; I had the impression that you felt that the internal governmental checks and balances would save the day.

      I'm afraid I still believe that the original deal was pretty much bought into all the way to the top, and that the good work of the protestors has only bought an election-year delay (a significant accomplishment in its own right). But I could be wrong.

      It's certainly true that suddenly killing the project dead would be very bad electoral strategy, so I readily accept that a delay until after the election is the very best outcome we could expect. Please note, this is nearly the opposite of pissing and moaning — I am very happy with the short-term decision, despite being somewhat pessimistic about the long-term outcome.

      As far as that pessimism goes, we will have to wait until 2013 to see if it's justified. As with a number of other issues, I will be happy to be proven wrong.

      BTW, I don't think I ever asserted that the State EIR approval was absolutely unstoppable, just that I didn't believe it was a "low-level" action. If I did assert otherwise, I was wrong, and I'm delighted to admit it.

  • BerkeleyBear

    OT, but they are making big budget version of the "The Lorax" for release in 2012. I'm guessing it is going to somehow wind up being an endorsement of Coca-Cola and petroleum byproducts, but it may not suck completely.

  • Negropolis

    This country's energy policy is fucked to say the very least. We have to scream just to get something as earth-rapping as this delayed, and then you have the mindless drone-conservatives screaming bloody murder when something like Solyndra fails. Well, shit, you know how many times you have to fail to have a game-changing, badly-needed technology invented? It's called R&D, fuckers.

  • "At that moment, Canada exposed itself on our airwaves and attempted to shove pipe down our throat, insisting 'you want jobs, don't you?'"

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