of course not

Seven In Ten Republicans Obviously Don’t Care About Herman Cain Being a Sex Creep

There’s important new polling data about the power-worshiping misogynists who make up the Republican base: It doesn’t matter if Herman Cain constantly used his executive job as a way to sexually harass all the women unfortunate enough to have to work for him. Doesn’t matter a bit! Herman Cain is still the greatest Republican candidate ever, possibly since Reagan or Hoover.

USA Today reports:

Seven in 10 Republicans in the ABC News/Washington Post survey say the allegations of misconduct stemming from Cain’s tenure as head of the National Restaurant Association do not matter when it comes to picking a presidential candidate.

And even if Cain is guilty of constantly harassing women and then paying off those women and then being a total liar about the whole thing when he’s running for president and otherwise being a total pig, it’s the fault of liberals for hating black people. [USA Today]

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    1. offbrandboobs

      And still, Herm's jizz residue is probably the least offensive animal by-product on said pizza box.

  1. CapnFatback

    Hell, 7 out of 10 Republicans believe that Cain's being completely unqualified and fundamentally irrational do not matter when it comes to picking a presidential candidate, either.

    1. Occupy V572

      Plus Cain's got a commercial with actual footage of Clarence Thomas saying "a high-tech lynching." I want to call it "reverse racism" but it's something even more cynical than that, like those people who argue that any white person is "objectively" a racist because they have benefited from being a member of the oppressor class.

      1. Chet Kincaid

        Who is this who argues that benefiting from racism makes you a racist? I've only heard it argued that political and economic systems can be racist, which is true, but different. It's more likely that white folks get offended when you remind them that they might benefit from ill-gotten gains. But don't we all? (Benefit and get offended, if you're not following)

        1. BerkeleyBear

          I do believe I was occasionally accused of complicity and hence racism by not disavowing the benefits of my white skin back in my college days. Then again, I was also accused of getting a spot in my college of choice because my skin wasn't yellow by a Chinese kid whose SATs were over 100 points lower, and I knew a bunch of white assholes who figured anyone darker than a paper bag (other than the Asian math wizards) got in on affirmative action and really was as dumb as a bag of rocks. So I figured all the stupid sort of washed out.

          1. TitsOccupado

            Yeah, I got blamed for using my racial benefit when my family moved from the Hunters Point projects to the North Beach projects when I was like a year old.

          2. Negropolis

            I'm still kind of amazed at the descriptors used in old (and not really that old) newspaper and magazines. We weren't people or even Americans. We weren't Asian Americans or African Americans or black people. We were Orientals and Negroes. We sound so exotic! When, truth was, we American-born were just as boringly American as everybody else.

            When one of my grandmas came up to live in Detroit, she was steered toward black neighborhoods (just like every other black person that came to the city). When they were able to move into better housing, only Jews would sell to blacks so when they did have white neighbors, they were Jews. And when they left, it was all black, again.

        2. Occupy V572

          Maybe that argument was something I thought I heard somebody say, and nobody ever really said it. People said a lot of crazy stuff in the 60s. What I was really trying to say, before side-tracking myself, was that Cain’s and Thomas’ attempts tried to recharacterize accusations of sexual harassment by them as racially motivated attacks on them are cynical and dishonest.

          1. Chet Kincaid

            Yep. And it's funny how they run home to the Mommy of "I'm being repressed on account of my race!" when they've previously proclaimed that all the other blacks who might have a complaint are shiftless embarrassments.

        3. starfanglednut

          I actually do feel guilty for having benefited by being white in a racist society, or a racist planet, really (global apartheid anyone?) It may or may not be logical, but that is how I feel. For a short period of my life, I was a grubby homeless kid. I remember the looks of disdain, indifference and suspicion, and how pervasively hurtful they were. At times, I have imagined being black in America to be a somewhat similar experience, except it is lifelong,virtually constant, and begins, horrifyingly, when the person is a small child. I benefit, directly, from that suffering. I don't really know a way to renounce those benefits, but this uncomfortable awareness has been a catalyst for spiritual and emotional growth. Conversations about race can be very tricky, and I hope I haven't offended anyone.

          We now return to our regular snark.

    1. ifthethunderdontgetya

      Breaking: Multiple sources on the internet confirm that Herman Cain has engaged in sexual intercourse with innocent sheep.

      Mr. Cain's failure to address these charges raises even more questions.

      Was the sex purely missionary, Mister Cain? Or did you do it "doggy style?"

      The people have a right to know!

      1. MaxNeanderthal

        That's a baabaa-ric suggestion!
        I heard he does them overlooking a cliff edge (makes 'em push back harder…)

    2. Schmannnity

      All this Cain news has really put that story about that girl Glenn Beck raped and killed on the back burner.

  2. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    See, if Clinton has simply paid off his women, there would have been no problems. Republicans hated him for not letting the sexual harassment market work the way God intended.

        1. Negropolis

          One? My family in Arkansas to this day — black, Clinton-loving liberals — is convinced due to local lore that Clinton had sex with half the women in the state, and impregnated about a quarter of those. Clinton has so many rumored "black babies" in Arkansas, it's hard to keep track of them. lol

  3. Callyson

    "He's just the victim of the liberal media"
    "They're just in it for the money"
    "Oh come on, it was just a bit of fun–have a sense of humor"
    "There's too much government interference in the workplace already"
    "Why didn't this story come out when he was polling in single digits, huh? Why is this news now that he is the frontrunner?"
    "This was all orchestrated by Rahm"
    "I don't care as long as I get my tax cut. 9 9 9 4eva!"

  4. Tommmcattt

    Pfft. Seven of ten Republicans would fellate a mule before admitting that anything even tenuously connected to their party wasn't the bestest Bestest BESTEST THING EVER!!!1111!!!!

  5. hagajim

    When you're a dick, it doesn't matter if the guy running for Prez is a dick – cause he's just like you!

    1. HistoriCat

      There has never in the history of the world been a people better mannered and less inclined to insulting acts of prejudice than today’s Americans

      Truly, Derbyshire has a way with words.

    2. Occupy V572

      Derbyshire needs some penitentiary time to learn that there is, indeed, such a thing as sexual harassment. "John, hand me that bar of soap I just dropped, will you?"

  6. chicken_thief

    As long as his name isn't "Mitt Romney" 9 out of 10 Republicans could give a rats ass what he did/does/hopes to do.

  7. OneYieldRegular

    Given many of Republicans' policy positions and recent legislative accomplishments, I'd just assumed that the very fact of one's being Republican meant that one was okay with harassing women.

  8. SorosBot

    See, Mittens, it didn't work; your dirt release on Cain was about an issue the base doesn't care about, sexual harassment, and allowed him to play the victim and claim the liberals were after him even though it was obviously you.

    1. wondering where i am

      Twas Rove. C'mon, you know it was Rove. Cain is a disaster for the Republican Party, plus no one takes little Karl seriously enough any more, so he wanted to act out.

  9. el_donaldo

    Well since it'd be a cold day in hell when Cain actually gets the nomination, I suppose it doesn't matter in the end to anybody what he does or did.

  10. orygoon

    But you know they'll be full to the gunnels with screaming righteous rage if he LIES ABOUT IT UNDER OATH.

  11. widestanceshakedown

    The Hermandingo Doctrines should be a hoot.

    Yes, I went there, but it was with sincere religious belief and/or moral conviction, so suck it.

    1. Negropolis

      You wouldn't happen to be from Michigan, would you? 'Cause, that's how we end controversial statements.

  12. Redhead

    Makes sense. Seven out of ten republicans are sex creeps as well.

    As long as he's not a democratic.

  13. KathrynSane

    Seeing as irrational hatred of women and their bodies is practically the GOP's platform nowadays, this isn't as surprising as I wish it was. Still just as depressing, though.

  14. vacuumslayer

    But he's making liberal heads essplode with his STRONG CONSERVATIVE BLACKNEZZ. That's all the reason the wingnuts need to double down on that sweet, sweet SUGA-CAIN. Hell, his sexism just makes him hotter!

  15. chicken_thief

    This new, accepting GOP prolly won't care if Miss Lindsay comes out of the closet, too – right?

    1. Negropolis

      It kind of is about them being OK pervs, because it's all about hypocrisy when it comes to the GOP. This is the party that, to this day, has a very narrow idea about what constitutes a "family" and "family values."

    1. GeorgiaBurning

      Get rid of government interference in mathematics and 1+1 will equal 3 in ten years. And if you believe that, there's a great plan to privatize your social security.

  16. Redhead

    Seven out of ten republicans are shocked that his sex scandals were with adult women.

    Only Dems do that.

    Course, no one's pointed out to them yet that this man has the intelligence of Palin and Bachmann combined.

  17. HempDogbane

    "7 in 10 Republicans" is the title of the new online Astroglide video. Director's cut will be "10 in 7 Republicans."

  18. BigDumbRedDog

    10/10 republicans are sex creeps themselves, which means that 3/10 republicans are total hypocrites.

  19. Tundra Grifter

    Mr. Cain always says he's not a politician.

    That's only because his Senate campaign in 2004 failed miserably.

  20. carlgt1

    it's funny how morals go out the window for many people when they think they'll get a few percent tax savings!

  21. No_surprises

    Not only 7 in 10. Basically all of us have been desensitized to sexual creepery by none other than Bill Clinton, the slick master of all forms of sexual harassmant. When he got done with what "is is", we could probably ask some honey for some oral favor since according to him, that isn't sex. It's not much more than a handshake or a third eye blind kiss.

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