fail monsters

Rick Scott Has No Idea Where This ‘Tampa Bay’ Place Is

Don't even bother trying to ask him where Georgia is.Further proof Rick Scott is a demon robot from outer space: he has not yet not learned where one of the major urban areas in the state he governs is, because he arrived in Florida from his desolate home asteroid-space landfill too recently. When reporters from the St. Petersburg Times mentioned to him that the newspaper will soon change its name to the Tampa Bay Times to reflect the larger area that the paper now covers, Rick droned back in his hollow nasal way, “Does the region call itself the Tampa Bay region? Is that what it calls itself? The region does?” Uhhh.

Tampa Bay encompasses Tampa, St. Petersburg and Clearwater and is the state’s second-largest metropolitan area. His insane comment delivered with questionable English has a few people wondering whether or not he could possibly be quite this stupid. The official verdict is that, yes, probably yes.

From WTSP.com:

Steve Bousquet, the Tallahassee Bureau Chief for the St. Petersburg Times, tells 10 News he and others were surprised by Scott’s answer.

“No he was not joking. He seemed to be a little bit unfamiliar with the term,” Bousquet said.

The Governor’s answer also surprised others after hearing about his response.

“It’s not something we can just laugh off,” Tampa council member Frank Reddick said. “I think the governor needs to go get a history lesson,” he added.

(A history lesson?) Anyway, maybe not laugh off, but certainly is the kind of thing we can, and must, laugh at. [WTSP.com]

Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here with a few helpful links to ease your transition to Disqus - Claiming Old Accounts - Claiming Your ID Comments [Looking into whether this is still possible - Shy] - Turning off Disqus Notifications. And, as always, remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • WhatTheHolyHeck

    “I think the governor needs to go get a history lesson,”

    Or maybe, you know, a geography lesson. Oh, Florida.

    • DaRooster

      (note to self… *F5* to refresh…)

      • WhatTheHolyHeck

        Well, you did use the word "taint" and that should count for something.

        The only image I could manage to invoke was that of the entire state of Florida grasping desperately to under-perform Mississ-iss-issippi-ippistan in education.

    • iburl

      Or maybe a brain implant.

    • HogeyeGrex

      Or a biology lesson.

      Oh, Tampa Bay. America's Frenulum.

      • Mort_Sinclair

        Fun! We can have a list!

        Florida: America's gangrenous appendix!

    • Generation[redacted]

      As long as it's not anthropology.

    • Omophagist

      Give him a break, the guy was probably high on meth, which from what I understand is what 95% of the non-geriatric population of Florida is high on at any given time.

      • Generation[redacted]

        Everyone except the welfare recipients. They're clean.

  • Pragmatist2

    "is that near Tampa-tampa-tampa-tampastan?" responded Herman Cain when the matter was raised with him. "Some hot women down there, I hear."

    • chicken_thief

      And then, putting his hand under his chin, showed about how tall they were compared to his wife.

  • GunToting[Redacted]

    Actually, Frank, what the governor needs is a GEOGRAPHY lesson. And a good solid kick in the taint.

  • GuanoFaucet

    Ugly, evil and stupid is no way to go through life, Rick.

    • bureaucrap

      But he's rich as $#!^, and that makes up for a great multitude of sins.

    • emmelemm

      Seems to be working well for him so far.

  • slithytoves

    I think the governor needs to go get a history lesson

    He can't get a history lesson because he fired all the historians along with the anthropologists and archaeologists, and apparently, geographers.

    • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

      All branches of science have a well-known liberal bias, don't you know?

      • CZL

        Even Creation Science?

        • Chichikovovich

          That's science fiction.

          • ShaveTheWhales

            Science fiction LIBEL!!

      • TitsOccupado

        Especially cartography, these days.

        • http://oliphantparts.org/ natoslug

          Rick's cancelling South Park? The bastard!

    • MegPasadena

      That's why he fired all the scholars who know and teach about things.
      This way soon nobody will realize that he always says dumb things.

  • DaRooster

    "I think the governor needs to go get a history lesson…”
    "… and a Geography lesson… and some lessons on manners… he could stand to learn some math (since you know… people on welfare can't afford their own urine tests), throw some science in there… and round it off with just a plain ol' "I'm gonna teach you a lesson ya maggot." lessons."

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Ethics.

      • proudgrampa

        Given the current crop of Republicans / Tea Partiers / Right Wing Slobs, I am convinced that Ethics is an elective they would never take.

  • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

    “I think the governor needs to go get a history lesson,” he added.

    He needs a lesson, all right. I think the prison term he somehow avoided with his Medicare scam would be a great start.
    ~

  • http://wonkette.com/ Monsieur_Grumpe

    Someone needs a drug test.

    • Occupy V572

      He could get an employee discount!

  • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

    You know how else can't answer basic geography questions?

    • Occupy V572

      Chimpy, certainly.

    • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

      teabaggers and their pretzeldential candidates?
      ~

    • SorosBot

      Christopher Columbus?

    • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

      Douglas "Wrong Way" Corrigan?

    • DaRooster

      95% of US citizens?

      (we are the 5%)

    • WhatTheHolyHeck

      Caitlin Upton.

      It's not her fault, though. Some US Americans can't afford maps.

      • DaRooster

        And such…

      • Occupy V572

        Consider, though, her other virtues

        • Moonbatting Average

          Woah there! Don't confuse Kate Upton with Caitlin Upton! The comely lass you linked to is the former, and indeed quite "virtuous".

          • Occupy V572

            Google did it!

    • http://zvibleindmeis.tumblr.com/ Spurning Beer

      The residents of You-becky-becky-becky-stan-stan?

    • BaldarTFlagass

      The country of Africa?

    • memzilla

      The Wasilla Rain Forest Products Association?

    • Not_So_Much

      Lou Sara?

    • anniegetyerfun

      Hitler? Assuming he really IS dead, I mean, and not actually living in Florida, hidden among the elderly Jews.

      • WhatTheHeck

        But he sure knew his weather:
        “Springtime for Hitler ünd Germany. Winter for Poland ünd Hungary.”

    • HistoriCat

      Fox News?

    • Mort_Sinclair

      Glenn Beck who thinks the state of New York is Egypt, cf, Wonkette 2/7/11: http://wonkette.com/437268/fox-news-geography-egy

    • TitsOccupado

      That depends on whether Tampa Bay is a country or a continent.

      • mrpuma2u

        You can see Cuba from there, I heard

    • Kakkeltje

      I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some . . . people out there in our nation don't have maps and, uh, I believe that our, uh, education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and, I believe that they should, our education over HERE in the U.S. should help the U.S., uh, or, uh, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future, for our children

    • Callyson

      Herman Cain?

    • RadioOcupados

      Carmen San Diego?

      • Generation[redacted]

        Where the fuck IS she???!

    • horsedreamer_1

      Rosie Ruiz?

    • Negropolis

      Jessica Simpson?

  • Occupy V572

    I was okay with everything he's done up until now, but not knowing the designation for the second largest SMA in Florida is obviously an impeachable offense.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    “Does the region call itself the Tampa Bay region? Is that what it calls itself? The region does?”

    A self-aware "region" (whatever that means on his home galaxy) is something not seen before on the planet earth.

    • NorthStarSpanx

      “Does the region call itself the Tampa Bay region? Is that what it calls itself? The region does? The region? The."

      . . .and then he sputtered out on that train of thought.

    • ibwilliamsi

      Regions on his planet have mouths and speak.

  • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

    Further proof Rick Scott is a demon robot from outer space

    I believe he is a Reptiloid, Kirsten.

    "Reptiloids are people, my friend. LIZARD PEOPLE!"

    – Mittens

  • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

    In other news: Governor McDonnell registers surprise regarding a region in VA he's barely acquainted with: "what, they don't grow apples exclusively in Apple-achia?"

    • Guppy

      I thought it was the continent of Apple Asia.

  • Chichikovovich

    For most people, this would be embarrassing. For Rick Scott, it might be the least stupid thing he's done all year.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    If I lived in the Tampa Bay region, I'd be perfectlly happy if Rick Scott remained ignorant of the location (and perhaps the very existence) of the place.

    Because I hate those "uh-oh … that's not a moon" moments.

  • MittsHairHelmet

    I bet he doesn't even know Jacksonville is in FL.

    • Negropolis

      Nobody does, not even Floridians. I tell you, that has to be one of the most forgotten, most faceless metropolitan areas in the country.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

    Translation: Panhandle or GTFO.

  • chicken_thief

    Christopher Columbus?

    Why is this here as well as under "You know how else can't answer basic geography questions? " where it really belongs?!

    • RedneckMuslin

      It's sponsored by Queen Isabella and King Ferdinand?

    • Guppy

      Premature commentation. You just got too excited is all.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    Scott doesn't need a history or geography class. He needs a Fuck You, Governor Please Get Cancer of the Asshole class

  • Joshua Norton

    Rainman without the math skills.

    • GuanoFaucet

      "I'm an excellent governor."

      • LesBontemps

        And so say all his letters to the editor, also too.

    • Negropolis

      Oh, I don't know about that. He seems to have calculated how to get a shitload of money into his pockets at his previous jobs.

  • FakaktaSouth

    "arrived in Florida from his desolate home asteroid-space landfill too recently"

    Lordy lordy poor old beat up on Texas… (you know, where he made his billions off of Medicare fraud before moving to Florida to be closer to his, um, customer base. fuckerfuckerfuckerfucker)

    • prommie

      You're so cute when you are all angry and frustrated at the injustice and misery in the world.

      • FakaktaSouth

        Oh man I missed you today. I got my ass kicked by GUYS for making light of fucking for money, cause I'm a sexist. It was like 1990 all over again when this GUY (who was trying to get in my pants for christs sake) was all offended AT ME when I thought the RHCP song "party on your pussy" was a hilarious compliment and he thought I was insensitive to ? I dunno? Women with over partied upon vaginal regions? Anyway. I'm gonna start telling black people all about how bad racism is.

  • chicken_thief

    I'd hit that. No. Really. I'd hit that fucker.

    • FNMA

      Looks like someone already did. With a shovel.

      • proudgrampa

        That, or a baseball bat.

        • iburl

          …or a water balloon full of Nair.

    • Negropolis

      I'd hit it, too. With an East Bay-registered Mercedes Benz, I would.

  • GuanoFaucet

    Well, to be fair, the Koch brothers don't pay Scott to think.

    • DaRooster

      So, they're getting their monies worth.

    • Negropolis

      Well, they sure as hell don't pay him to look pretty, so what is he good for?

  • orygoon

    We laugh. But isn't it Florida's voters that need to take a fucking test?

    • DaRooster

      Well given their voting skills… they gotta be high.

  • SorosBot

    If no one refers to the Tampa Bay region, then how do you explain the existence of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Devil Rays?

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      "Devil Rays" was a great name, they should have kept it. Dumb-ass fundies.

      • SorosBot

        Fundies can ruin everything, even baseball. Of course this is a team that wasn't able to sell out during the fucking World Series.

        • paris biltong

          They should rename themselves the Jesus Rays. Voila!

          • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

            The Sun-Beams, as in "Jesus Wants Me For A…"

        • prommie

          Wasn't the stadium Hoverround-accesible? The "Tampa Bay Area" is one of the universe's foulest assholes. This is a place where there truly is no "there." It is a desolate wasteland of the decrepit and tawdry and tacky and chintzy, mixed with shitty and stupid.

          • SorosBot

            It's an asshole in the middle of a wang? I didn't know that was biologically possible.

            As the home of Scientology, though, Clearwater's got to have loads of gullible moronic douchebags.

          • prommie

            Its an oozing pustule on the back of a wang that is suffering some kind of chronic fungal infection.

          • proudgrampa

            Ewww. You made me throw up in my mouth a little!

        • not that Dewey

          They ruined this perfectly good U.S. Highway, too.

          But the power of college football/basketball must trump even the power of Jesus (even in Arizona!), because Arizona State University still has the Sun Devils.

          • BaldarTFlagass

            Hockey too (New Jersey).

          • not that Dewey

            Well, professional hockey has Satan Himself in their employ.

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            Just trying to stay in shape.

          • not that Dewey

            And you look great!

  • ThundercatHo

    Could somebody please take him back to his mother ship or at least shove him back into his pod?

    • proudgrampa

      Where is Harry Potter when we need him?

  • Terry

    Doesn't he watch football either? There is a team called the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, for heaven's sake.

    • EatsBabyDingos

      Probably thinks the team was named for $1.00 corn, because its a buck an ear.

      • proudgrampa

        I see what you did there.

      • TitsOccupado

        Most people keep their buckin' ears under their buckin' hat.

    • justkillmenow

      Well, kind of…

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    Well it's a bit confusing. It was St. Petersburg…then Petrograd and then Leningrad and then back to St. Petersburg and then they opened a new St. Petersburg in Florida which is now Tampa.

    • chicken_thief

      Like Scott would know all that. Unless he had a Medicaid scam center there, that is.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      St Petersburg, FL – The City of the Living Dead.

    • Fare la Volpe

      And I hear that Istanbul was Constantinople. Now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople.

      • horsedreamer_1

        & India is going nuts with the new names: Kolkata, Mumbai…

        & that NVA named a city after a prostitute!

      • not that Dewey

        People just liked it better that way.

      • LesBontemps

        That's nobody's business but the Turks'.

  • DaRooster

    “Does the region call itself the Tampa Bay region? Is that what it calls itself? The region does?”

    Um… also… too… regions do not talk, moron.

    • DahBoner

      My Republican brother lived in Cali for over 15 years and didn't know where "Silicon Valley" was….

      • HogeyeGrex

        I'd venture he thought it was between the stripper's tits.

      • Generation[redacted]

        It's where Rick Perry canceled his fundraiser this week because nobody wanted to attend.

    • IncenseDebate

      I heard Rick Scott communicates with his region and he shaves his area. Too. Also. Vomit.

  • El Pinche

    Savor Rick Scott, Florida. Enjoy your human cobblestone governor.

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      "Cobblestone, Cobblestone, Cobblestone Gov'n'r:
      Don't trouble w/ facts, but these facts are troubl'n.
      Ask him a riddle and he's bound to flub'ner;
      Cobblestone, Cobblestone, Cobblestone Gov'n'r."

  • MrFizzy

    Clearly his hair didn't fall out because of the heat emanating from his brain.

  • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

    Ok, Rick is either trying to piss off Buccaneers fans or running for Miss Florida, cause really, nobody is this stupid.

    • DaRooster

      "Ubeki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan"

  • MozakiBlocks

    His mother must be so proud.

    • DaRooster

      She should be tested…

  • littlebigdaddy

    And he thinks all those brown people in Miami are Messicans.

  • Crank_Tango

    Christ. And I am moving to Florida next week with a ring for a girl who says she doesn't want me any more.
    Ah, fuckit, one more sane voter, right? Or at least one more dem voter?

    • SayItWithWookies

      You should consider yourself lucky that you have to go to Florida to find a chick who doesn't want you — I can find plenty of 'em right here. Shit, sell the ring and stay where you are or move someplace you'll like — it'll be better for both of you.

    • HistoriCat

      moving to Florida next week with a ring for a girl who says she doesn't want me any more.

      Want to rethink that claim to sanity?

    • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Johnny-Appletruth/133951326629923?sk=wall deanbooth

      At least you know the score before going there. I had a friend who quit his job to follow his gf to middle Alaska, and then she promptly broke up with him.

      • Crank_Tango

        Yeah I had a buddy who was working for the UN in Africa, and his wife wanted to go back to the states, understandably, and she got him to quit his job, go back to Chicago, where her family was from, not his, and then said she wanted a divorce. WTF.I know I got a long road ahead of me but if it don't work then I will know I tried.

        • Beowoof

          Good luck.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Yep – if you don't try, you'll go nuts wondering "what if?"
          Good luck!

        • BaldarTFlagass

          If they didn't have a pussy, there'd be a bounty on them.

          • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

            Oh, I'm sure they say of us, "if they didn't control the power structure, their severed cocks would all be in a ditch a half-mile away from home."

      • TitsOccupado

        That's exactly how I ended up in the Eastern High Sierra, and too broke to move again for about 24 years.

    • angryhaiku

      That is either super romantic or completely insane.

      Either way, call me if it doesn't work out!

      • Fare la Volpe

        You say that like they're mutually exclusive.

      • Crank_Tango

        Well I know it is a pretty dumb idea, so super romantic? My problem is I am about 4 months too late…Sent from my iPhone

      • Crank_Tango

        well, she told me she loves someone else now, so you can email your number to my name @gmail LOL.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      There's a thin line between "deluded sadsack" and "stalker," but both are across the state line in Florida. Think on it before you make that move!

    • Gainsbourg69

      The funny thing is that there are more dems than wingnuts down here. What fucks it up for us is the democrat's machine. If it weren't for them this dick head (literally) would've never been elected.

      Welcome to Florida, by the way. I hope you don't land in one of our numerous shit holes. And if it doesn't work out with your girl, at least you have the active Florida lifestyle to lok forward to.

    • fuflans

      oh crank i hope this works out for you.

      if not, you always have us.

      • Crank_Tango

        I got a long row to hoe, but I think eventually I will get her back. thanks for your support, everybody!Sent from my iPhone

  • nounverb911

    Tampa Bay is right next to St. Jetersburg.
    Jeter's House.

    • proudgrampa

      I would hate to do the housework there… I'd have to buy a riding vacuum cleaner.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        It's great for keeping in shape … Jeter can jog 1/4 mile without leaving the house.

  • prommie

    I thought they changed the name of that area to "Travoltia."

  • http://www.wonkette.com John Birf Society

    Classic misdirection– now no one will search for the fifth horcrux hidden somewhere in Tampa Bay.

  • OC_Surf_Serf_#OLA

    Tampa Bay…hmmm…looking at the map…isn't that up around the prostate?

    • memzilla

      Tallahassee has to bend over and cough.

  • Trannysurprise

    To be fair the name "Tampa Bay Region" does sound a lot better than "Tract Housing Hell Full of Racist Assholes" which was what they were going to call it, obvsly.

  • proudgrampa

    I'm sure they taught geography at Hogwart's.

    • actor212

      But Lex Luthor knew it well! I saw the Superman movie!

  • Not_So_Much

    As long as he's doing his part to keep China from getting nukes, I'm willing to give him a pass on this.

  • paris biltong

    Tampax bay? Yeech.

  • widestanceshakedown

    Since he has no idea where he is, let's slip a sack over his head in the middle of the night, ship him off to Gitmo, and tell him he's the emperor who must crush the rogue regime claiming to be in charge.

  • DahBoner

    "Tampa Bay encompasses Tampa, St. Petersburg and Clearwater and is the state’s second-largest metropolitan area."

    What?

    Every Teabagger on Hillbilly Heroin knows that Tampa bay area is the "go to" place for Dr. Feelgood pill mills…

  • OneYieldRegular

    Oh come on, Rick. I live in California, and I can see Tampa Bay from my house.

  • prommie

    Why did Constantinople get the works?

    • HogeyeGrex

      Not really my business. You'll have to ask the Turks.

    • Katydid

      It's nobody's bidness but the Turks!

      • prommie

        I hear its very sunny there. The sun is a mass of incandescent gas, a gigantic nuclear furnace, where hydrogen is turned into helium at a temperature of millions of degrees, you know.

        • horsedreamer_1

          I heard a live version of this — also performed by They Might Be Giants — that sounded like really kooky OI! punk.

          Greatness, naturally.

          • TitsOccupado

            The whole universe was in a hot, dense state.

          • prommie

            The whole universe was in Florida?

  • actor212

    Them dirty Florida hippies living in their "regions"…

  • owhatever

    The St. Pete Times kicked the Gubernator Voldemort's ass around the block several times during his campaign. The right wingers, not caring about the crimes and history of their candidate, still elected him.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      In Florida, political candidates with criminal backgrounds have "job experience."

  • fawkdifiknow

    Great Scott!! He did the impossible. He made Jeb Bush look smart.

  • Blueb4sunrise

    Isn't there some kinda gathering of lunatics somewhere around there?
    Oh yeah.

    Join us August 2012 in Tampa Bay! http://gopconvention2012.com/

    • Guppy

      And from the other end of Interstate 4…
      http://www.sunshinestatenews.com/story/tea-party-

      • Blueb4sunrise

        Yikes! Comments are …….Yikes!
        That's an event to keep an eye on.

        Wait, isn't Dayton in Ohio?

        • Guppy

          Thankfully, I have better things to blow $150 on this weekend.

          • Blueb4sunrise

            Maybe there will be video.

        • dizzeeboy

          Just wandered over there. New commenter "Suq Madiq" made a terse rebuttal.

          • Blueb4sunrise

            Heh.

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        Boo! From the headline, I expected actual, physical violence.

        • Guppy

          It's only about three miles from here to here, so it might still be possible, depending on the battery life on those mobility scooters.

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      Huh. Somewhat less mosque-y than their old logo was, I perceive…

      • Blueb4sunrise

        Fergot about that mosque-y issue. The new one hates the States apparently.

        "….features a three-starred red, white and blue flag – symbolizing equality, justice and opportunity – and the party’s traditional mascot, the elephant."
        http://www2.tbo.com/news/2011/oct/18/13/rnc-unvei

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Actually, the three stars are Florida, Texas, and Arizona. You know — the real states, where real 'merkins live.

          • Blueb4sunrise

            As an Arizonan (weeps softly) I'd have to say that we're falling behind in the batshit crazy competition in favor of just pure assholinity.

  • barto

    It's so amusing when those who are intellectualy challenged AND evil FAIL in their condescension. If only there were consequences for these poeple. But if a $600 million fine can't even stop this turd, probably nothing ever will.

  • Arken

    You'll have to forgive Rick Scott. He thinks 'the bay' is something people bet on in that funny song the negroes sing.

    • Guppy

      "I get no kick from champagne…"

    • Chichikovovich

      And he thinks the mayor of "the Bay" is Bob Tailnag.

    • TitsOccupado

      Who are these "Camptown Ladies" of which you speak?

    • prommie

      Whatever happened to Mare Winningham? I bet she's old and gray now, not what she used to be.

  • Slim_Pickins

    What does a governor need to know about foreign lands, anyway?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      He's gotta be ready for those Iranians, who are about to mount an invasion across the border.

  • meatlofer

    St. Petersburg is in Russia! You ASSHOLE!

  • SayItWithWookies

    Rick Scott doesn't need to know about Geography. Did Genghis Khan stop to ask what town he was in every time he stopped somewhere to rape and pillage and scrape the gold leaf off the domes? No — leave that shit for the scribes and historians, he's got more important things to do.

  • subsum

    It's Tampa Bay, people. Who cares what they call themselves?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Tampa Bayesians. Probably.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Well good luck then — I know how you feel, wanting to make sure, so I hope it works out.

  • a_pink_poodle

    What's a Tampa Bay? Is that like a ladies personal business sort of thing or something?

  • SarahsBush

    "I see your not-knowing-what-Tampa-Bay is and raise you a take-a-history-lesson."

    Never, EVER, underestimate the stupidity of Floridians.

  • HedonismBot

    All this time, I never thought he was stupid, just evil. Evil usually goes with smart, you know what I mean?

  • Redhead

    Scott/Palin(first 1/2)/Perry(second 1/2, after the rehab stint) 2012!!!!

  • dennis1943

    I'm proud to be yor Governor……..of the great state of…..uh…..uh……someone help me out here……

    • prommie

      Harumph.

  • Ramon X

    There has been some misunderstanding here. Actually, he was just interjecting a little lighthearted satire into the interview.

    • proudgrampa

      Satire??? That is not permitted, here. Und that vich ist not permitted, ist verboten!

  • Papa_Uniform

    Tampa Bay, Shampa Bay. Just be grateful he knows he's in Florida. Oh, wait. He doesn't???

  • proudgrampa

    So, seriously. How bad is Tampa Bay? Sounds like it's a horrible place to live, and an even worse place to visit. Does it have any redeeming qualities? At all? Is this a place where Jimmy Buffett would go???

    Inquiring minds want to know.

    • prommie

      Jimmy Buffet prefers Cedar Key, somewhat to the north.

      • TitsOccupado

        Where the cheese comes from?

      • 102415

        I went there oncet and actually it's nice.

    • prommie

      Seems to me that the funny thing about Jimmy Buffet is the gigantic chasm on the coolness spectrum between BEING Jimmy Buffet, which come on, admit it, is ultra-cool, and being a Jimmy Buffet FAN, which is so uncool, its almost the ultimate in dork-dom. Jimmy is the 70s version of Dave Mathews, but without the depth. But what he has done with it, and the life he has crafted for himself from the proceeds of his modest talent and simple likeability, thats is so cool.

      • proudgrampa

        I would give my left arm to be Jimmy Buffet. How uncool is THAT?

        • BaldarTFlagass

          I'd be happy to be his seaplane. Go to cool places and shit.

        • prommie

          Exactly. BEING Jimmy Buffet is cool.

        • DaRooster

          But… you would probably suck at guitar… without your left arm.

          • proudgrampa

            I SAID it would be uncool.

        • Negropolis

          You can probably find some Wall Street banker to put together such an arrangement for the right price.

      • OccupytheDashboard

        Plus, they call themselves "Parrotheads" :::shiver:::

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        He should team up with Warren Buffet, and compose a catchy PSA jingle for the 1% about not Bogart-ing the GDP.

  • crybabyboehner

    I could have sworn he got booed throwing out the first pitch at a St. Pete Rays game.

  • Fare la Volpe

    I was about to say this sounds exactly like the kind of thing that would be helped by drinking.

    Good luck, Crank! If she don't say yes, then find you a high class Miami mamacita and a round of tequila slammers. Lord knows you deserve it.

  • hagajim

    Rick probably thought Tampa was where all the girls went to get their Taqmpastamps.

  • horsedreamer_1

    Carpetbagging, much?

  • Generation[redacted]

    I don't know where Tampa Bay is, but I count myself lucky in that regard.

  • 102415

    He was just fucking with them. He threw away the long awaited train link that was to be built there just about first thing as Governor. Everyone left and right set up a tremendous howl about it to no avail. Huge loss to the area and a great many jerbs down the toilet of Republcan't.

  • http://www.gurukalehuru.wordpress.com gurukalehuru

    If I was Tampa Bay, I would secede from Florida, I would.

  • comrad_darkness

    Clearly, Rick never committed medicare fraud in Tampa Bay.

  • kingofmeh

    now, the Hogsmeade metro area, he's familiar with THAT.

  • ttommyunger

    Just how many times does an asshole in Florida have to tip his hand before the voters realize he' only holding three Jokers and a fucking Wild Card?

  • Negropolis

    Silly me. Here I was thinking they called themselves "Tacky downtown office park surrounded by tacky foreclosures" region.

    He shouldn't feel bad. I forget Tampa on a regular basis. Flordia really does have some pretty shitty cities to be as wealthy a state as it is.

    That said, for your state's governor to not know what a major metropolitan area within that state calls itself is pretty scary.

  • Negropolis

    You guys are all wrong. He was asking a rhetorical and existential question. Because, you see, what region really is able to call itself anything?

    Dude, I'm blowing my own mind, here…like, I'm all out there in the ether and such.

  • NorthStarSpanx

    And the congressman who thought that the heavy physical weight of our armed forces on a S. Pacific Island was literally going to 'tip' it over.