CIVICS TEACHERS: THE INVISIBLE ENEMY  4:12 pm October 24, 2011

Florida Teacher Somehow Broke Law By Registering Students To Vote

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

Rick Scott: he kind of looks like a wart.Grim hairless weasel Rick Scott’s idea of defending democracy is to pass a hated law to make sure that minorities and students (read: dangerous liberals) in Florida are never again allowed to participate in the electoral process, which means that a high school civics teacher who organized a run-of-the-mill voter registration drive at her school is now technically a criminal. Jill Cicciarelli was unaware that it is currently illegal to go around freely teaching young people to give a shit about politics without the permission of the state, so she will face a fine or be forced to rub Rick Scott’s greasy devil noggin or something, as punishment for Caring.

The Daytona Beach News-Journal reports:

The teacher who heads up New Smyrna Beach High School’s student government association could face thousands of dollars in fines. Her transgression? Helping students register to vote.

Prepping 17-year-olds for the privileges and responsibilities of voting in a democracy is nothing new for civics teachers, but when Jill Cicciarelli organized a drive at the start of the school year to get students pre-registered, she ran afoul of Florida’s new and controversial election law.

Among other things, the new rules require that third parties who sign up new voters register with the state and that they submit applications within 48 hours.

That’s cute. Rick Scott’s entire strategy for handing Florida to the GOP in 2012 is to just paperwork voter registration groups to death and criminalize those who don’t fill out applications correctly. The joke will probably eventually be on Rick Scott, however, as high school civics teachers are at least literate, unlike his legions of idiot teabagger supporters. [Daytona Beach News-Journal]

 

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{ 204 comments }

nounverb911 October 24, 2011 at 4:15 pm

Needs more hanging chads.

GunToting[Redacted] October 24, 2011 at 4:22 pm

Needs moar hanging Scotts.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:25 pm

Srsly.

ifthethunderdontgetya October 24, 2011 at 4:15 pm

so she will face a fine or be forced to rub Rick Scott’s greasy devil noggin or something

Can I just say EWWWWWWWW!?
~

bflrtsplk October 24, 2011 at 4:40 pm

I'd rather just pay the fine.

738838 October 24, 2011 at 4:45 pm

Please don't.

Tommmcattt October 24, 2011 at 5:12 pm

At least it doesn't say "lick".

Chillwaver October 24, 2011 at 4:16 pm

That'll teach Professore Acorn not to mess with our freedumz.

nounverb911 October 24, 2011 at 4:22 pm

I had a Professor Acorn at Clemson, are they related?

flamingpdog October 24, 2011 at 4:59 pm

Professore Acorn? I always wondered what became of Acorna, the Unicorn Girl.

tihond October 24, 2011 at 4:16 pm

Wesley Donehue likes the hustle shown by Rick Scott here.

nounverb911 October 24, 2011 at 4:16 pm

When voting is outlawed, only outlaws will vote?

WhatTheHolyHeck October 24, 2011 at 4:57 pm

Silly rabbit. Voting isn't for kids; being part of a demographic group ripe for mandatory drug-testing is.

ifthethunderdontgetya October 24, 2011 at 4:16 pm

Why don't these corrupt, lying motherfuckers just pass a law saying it's illegal to vote for anyone but the gooper candidate, and get this farce of a democracy over with?
~

emmelemm October 24, 2011 at 4:28 pm

It certainly would eliminate these interminable "middle steps".

V572-⁂½‡‡‡‡‡ October 24, 2011 at 4:55 pm

You know, not even the Soviet-ear Rooskies did that. They'd have opposition candidates on ballots, with their names printed in tiny type so it was clear who you should vote for

Jukesgrrl October 24, 2011 at 8:15 pm

Yes, back in the dark ages my civics (what is THAT?) teacher used to scream at us about how we were supposed to be grateful to live in FREEDUM where we had candidates from two parties to choose from. Apparently Gov. Scott would have raised his hand to "challenge" the teacher (did every school have dorks who did that?) to argue that the USSR had a better system.

poorgradstudent October 24, 2011 at 6:47 pm

"Must be this rich to have a say in government."

Dok-cupy Everything October 24, 2011 at 8:11 pm

IT'S NOT A DEMOCRACY! IT'S A REPUBLIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Usually said whilst flecks of spittle hit the listener; inevitably followed by a discourse on the unconstitutionality of the Federal Reserve. Ron Paul pamphlet optional)

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:27 pm

You been talkin' to the Pauloonies again?

grandinquisitor October 24, 2011 at 4:17 pm

Everybody knows registering people to vote is unpatriotic.

tihond October 24, 2011 at 4:26 pm

If I remember my history correctly, Sam Adams and Paul Revere road their horses to Fenway Park to warn people that the British were going to try registering them to vote and also.

Generation[redacted] October 24, 2011 at 4:31 pm

Ringing them bells and filling out them forms.

Ramon X October 25, 2011 at 9:56 am

And firing warning shots.

BaldarTFlagass October 24, 2011 at 4:42 pm

"But the team choked away its wild card spot and the Green Monster was empty of potential voters."

GOPCrusher October 24, 2011 at 5:44 pm

That's because they were too busy drinking Sam Adams in the dugout.

DashboardBuddha October 24, 2011 at 6:37 pm

at first I thought you wrote "drinking Sam Adams in disgust"….which is about right.

SayItWithWookies October 24, 2011 at 4:18 pm

That's government red tape for you — it's an insidious evil when it prevents corporations from dumping toxic waste into nearby streams, but just look — it can be used for good, too, when it's preventing citizens from exercising their rights.

DaRooster October 24, 2011 at 4:39 pm

Ha… that's funny… citizens… rights… ha ha…

ManchuCandidate October 24, 2011 at 4:18 pm

Welcome to Florida, the a state democracy, sanity, reason and time forgot.

ifthethunderdontgetya October 24, 2011 at 4:23 pm

Since abandoning the land of my birth at the tender age of 3 or 4 (details are sketchy), I can say that I've had some good times in Ybor City (aka an old area of Tampa).

But getting from there to anywhere else involved such heinous traffic, maybe it'd be better if we just called the whole thing off.
~

Spurning Beer October 24, 2011 at 4:40 pm

The map tells me that Tampa has another suburb/exurb called Town 'n Country. There's also a Land O' Lakes somewhere down here.

I feel strongly that individuals who live in communities whose name contains a folksy, non-accepted contraction should not be allowed to vote.

I'll bet if I could work in a firing squad angle (or abortion, or gun ownership rights), I could get that through the legislature.

Negropolis October 25, 2011 at 12:15 am

I think you mean the oldish part of Tampa. lol

Rotundo_ October 24, 2011 at 5:03 pm

Florida, Leading the way down the shitter for the rest of Amurka! We here in Wisconsin are following your lead, but have a ways to go…

PuckStopsHere October 24, 2011 at 4:18 pm

Don't matter. A state that freely elects Rick Scott obviously don't give a fuck about voting in the first place.

Chillwaver October 24, 2011 at 4:50 pm

Electing Ricky Bobby is nothing compared to what these fuckers did back in back in 2000.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:28 pm

True. Sigh.

Negropolis October 25, 2011 at 12:15 am

Florida: The Honey Badger State

elviouslyqueer October 24, 2011 at 4:19 pm

"I just want them to be participating in our democracy," Cicciarelli said. "The more participation we have, the stronger our democracy will be."

Oh, Jill. Poor, well-meaning, deluded, about-to-be-shipped-off-to-the-Gulag Jill…

JustPixelz October 24, 2011 at 4:40 pm

Gulag? Gitmo is so much closer in distance … and in the spirit of ignoring the Constitution.

chicken_thief October 24, 2011 at 4:19 pm

Just one more example of how teachers, with their greedy unions and librul commie beliefs are rooning Ameriku. 10 – 1 she has ties to ACORN!!!!

finallyhappy October 24, 2011 at 5:28 pm

and look at that name- looks like an immigrant child to me!

DerrickWildcat October 24, 2011 at 4:19 pm

Thank you for new story. This shall be an intense debate!

Schmannnity October 24, 2011 at 4:19 pm

New Smyrna Beach? Don't sweat it Jill. But don't be taking your lawlessness to Jacksonville with all those Blacks or Orlando with all those Puerto Ricans.

flamingpdog October 24, 2011 at 5:08 pm

When I was a wee tyke, my mom made sure I pulled back the foreskin on my little Florida to make sure I washed out the build-up of new smyrna.

Indiepalin October 24, 2011 at 4:20 pm

If Rick Scott was smart, he would commission a telephone survey of the state's voters asking them how he is doing.

JustPixelz October 24, 2011 at 4:42 pm

"….survey of the state's voters…"

Voters? We don't need no stinkin' voters.

Dok-cupy Everything October 25, 2011 at 12:32 am

To save time, he could just poll the robocall machines. The think he's swell!

Goonemeritus October 24, 2011 at 4:21 pm

I’m sure this law will be equally enforced against all the evangelical voter registration drives.

Jukesgrrl October 24, 2011 at 8:19 pm

And all the homes for the aged where Rick likes to deliver his policy statements.

Chet Kincaid October 24, 2011 at 9:32 pm

What part of "registering non-white voters" can't you read between the lines?!

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:30 pm

The "registering" part?

FakaktaSouth October 24, 2011 at 4:21 pm

This here is a prime example of how Republicans fight to keep government out of your life. No voting.

Lucidamente1 October 24, 2011 at 4:22 pm

"The new rules require that third parties who sign up new voters register with the state": isn't that why so many Cubans came to Florida in the first place, to get away from shit like that?

GOPCrusher October 24, 2011 at 5:47 pm

Not Marco Rubio's parents.

BlueStateLibel October 24, 2011 at 4:22 pm

Can't someone just throw Holy Water or something on Rick Scott or say some kind of spell to get rid of him?

DaRooster October 24, 2011 at 4:41 pm

We use salt up here on the Nor-Cal Coast… for slugs like him.

Tommmcattt October 24, 2011 at 5:16 pm

He got horcruxes hidden all over the country. One of them is in Rush Limbaugh's nutsack, another is in Lindsey Grahm's special little under-the-bed box…

fuflans October 24, 2011 at 9:56 pm

and let's not mention the koch family receptacle.

Dok-cupy Everything October 25, 2011 at 12:34 am

Expelliarmus dumbfuckus!

metamarcisf October 24, 2011 at 4:23 pm

I don't want to say Rick Scott's popularity is waning, but his approval rating is currently somewhere south of Tony Sparano's.

Crank_Tango October 24, 2011 at 4:23 pm

Yet another example of Nobama taking away our constitutional rights!!!!

Generation[redacted] October 24, 2011 at 4:36 pm

Most devisive presdent in all history. What moer proof do you need? 2012 can't come soon enuf. Obummer stands for "one tern presnit"

Now if yul excoose me i'm off to my day job prooof reeding conservapedia.

GOPCrusher October 24, 2011 at 5:48 pm

GET YER GUBMINT HANDS OF MUH VOTER REGISTRATION FORM!

WordsOfWiesman October 24, 2011 at 4:23 pm

Sure, this law seems undemocratic and evil, but Rick Scott is just trying to save minorities and young people from the temptation to use the voting booth in a cynical attempt to vote for their own interests! Shouldn't we say thank you? Probably!

LesBontemps October 24, 2011 at 4:41 pm

Hooray for preventing the real voter fraud!

WhatTheHolyHeck October 24, 2011 at 4:59 pm

Paternalism is the new black.

CrunchyKnee October 24, 2011 at 4:24 pm

America's wang.

Generation[redacted] October 24, 2011 at 4:40 pm

Forever flacid.

Gratuitous World October 24, 2011 at 4:24 pm

this is how he's teaching kids about poll taxes we'll all have to pay by 2020.

LesBontemps October 24, 2011 at 4:24 pm

Why isn't this menace to freedom in Gitmo?

Chet Kincaid October 24, 2011 at 4:27 pm

Rick Scott?

LesBontemps October 24, 2011 at 4:46 pm

Whatever.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:32 pm

She will be, tout-suite!~

Barb October 24, 2011 at 4:24 pm

Democracy goes in, Democracy goes out, never a miscommunication.

BaldarTFlagass October 24, 2011 at 4:25 pm

Like the errant runaway Florida housewife, Rick Scott is disgusting filth.

elviouslyqueer October 24, 2011 at 4:28 pm

That's the real reason why Fucks and Fiends hated on her so badly. She was being unfaithful to Rick Scott!

emmelemm October 24, 2011 at 4:30 pm

Maybe she just wanted to get the fuck out of Florida for a while. I think we can all understand why.

hagajim October 24, 2011 at 4:28 pm

Better to have to rub his head than teabag him.

mookwrthwilson October 24, 2011 at 4:28 pm

Damn…no comment section on the article…I wanted to read diatribes about how somehow this lady was brainwashing all these kids or how the students were all illegal immigrants…damn…

BarackMyWorld October 24, 2011 at 4:28 pm

First, I think that teacher probably already got all the registration and authorization she needed when the state of Florida gave her a certification to teach kids about civics.

Second, criminalizing helping people register to vote sounds really unconstitutional.

Third, fuck you, Scott Walker.

CapnFatback October 24, 2011 at 4:32 pm

And fuck your little Rick Scott, too!

BaldarTFlagass October 24, 2011 at 4:28 pm

"she ran afoul of Florida’s new and controversial "Keep The Nigras, Spics, and Poors from Voting" election law."

How could she have known?

HogeyeGrex October 24, 2011 at 4:46 pm

They always have such catchy names for new laws.

Lionel[redacted]Esq October 24, 2011 at 4:29 pm

If only the GOP and segregationist had thought of this in the 1960s, we wouldn't have all those uppity blacks and browns causing all of our problems now.

Generation[redacted] October 24, 2011 at 4:39 pm

Makes you wonder why the south decided to voluntarily get rid of segregation in the first place, doesn't it?

Rosie_Scenario October 24, 2011 at 4:43 pm

Like Sen. Trent Lott said to Strom Thurmond on the occasion of his 100th birthday: "If you have won (on segrationist Dixiecrat platform) all those years ago, we wouldn't have some of the problems that we have now."

Negropolis October 25, 2011 at 12:23 am

Really, isn't that that scary that this is exactly the kind of legislation they would have thought up? Jim Crow and his chilluns aren't dead; they simply went into the Witness Protection program.

Schmannnity October 24, 2011 at 4:29 pm

If Riley is available, it might be prudent to open a full-time bureau in Tallahassee. Maybe you could split the cost with News of the Weird or Garden and Gun Magazine.

Nothingisamiss October 24, 2011 at 4:42 pm

I started rec'ing Gardens and Guns in the mail recently and thought "WTF." Turns out my friend in Berkley thought it was HIGH-larious!!!

Not if you live here.

Jukesgrrl October 24, 2011 at 8:23 pm

You mean that's not Wonket snark??

Schmannnity October 24, 2011 at 10:20 pm
PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:34 pm

Holy Jesus Mother of Gawd. WTF.

Spurning Beer October 24, 2011 at 4:45 pm

I was in Tallahassee last week, and saw an Occupy rally outside the Old Statehouse. So the advance work for Riley is already in place.

Guppy October 24, 2011 at 4:29 pm

Are you saying that Governor Scott's new election laws are actually job-killing regulations?

CapnFatback October 24, 2011 at 4:31 pm

A glimpse of Florida's Third-Party Voter Registration Aid Application:

Affiliation of Proposed New Voters (check one)

□ Republican
□ Libertarian
□ Tea Party
□ Other

Race of Proposed New Voters (check one)

□ White
□ Other

Age of Proposed New Voters (check one)

□ 65 or over
□ Other

Attitude of Proposed New Voters Toward Skinny, Bald Lizard Men (check one)

□ HAWT!!!
□ Other

SorosBot October 24, 2011 at 4:31 pm

How the fuck is a law like that constitutional?

Generation[redacted] October 24, 2011 at 4:38 pm

State constitutions are generally more fine-tuned to the "needs" of the "people"

PuckStopsHere October 24, 2011 at 5:16 pm

Unless counting a states' votes in a presidential election is the "need" in question, of course.

El Pinche October 24, 2011 at 4:41 pm

It's raining Koch money up in da Supreme Court..

GOPCrusher October 24, 2011 at 5:54 pm

It's not. But since we don't have a Department of Justice in this country anymore……..

Veritas78 October 24, 2011 at 8:01 pm

That's the truth. Eric Holder is a complete corporate pussy. Can anyone name any prosecution he's pursued? Bernie Madoff (how could he not), Bradley Manning, Wikileaks, medical marijuana growers… uh, help me out here. Surely there must be some bankers or credit-rating agencies or torturers or llegal-war-wagers or someone… chirp… … . . . . . . .

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:36 pm

Piece of shit is trying to take away my POT! Fuck him.

Negropolis October 25, 2011 at 12:26 am

Honestly, what is his claim to fame in this administration outside of escalating the Weed Wars? They've actively been trying to undermine the Michigan Medical Marijuana law, unlike the previous administration that left sorting out the law up to the state.

I can't for the life of me come up with a scenario in which I could describe the guy as more bad than good for American justice.

Fawkdifiknow October 24, 2011 at 4:31 pm

Republican democracy: Talking point.

Democratic democracy: Criminal act.

Guppy October 24, 2011 at 4:32 pm

Mensa member Rick Scott is currently in Brazil trying to sell Florida tourism to the locals.

Did I mention he's doing this in Rio and it's currently mid-spring down there?

BaldarTFlagass October 24, 2011 at 4:36 pm

The phrase "Carry coals to Newcastle" springs to mind. Or maybe Brazil is Rick's "Appalachian Trail Getaway Spot."

HogeyeGrex October 24, 2011 at 4:48 pm

I'm thinking more like Rick's "Dominican rent boy" spot.

Ayn Rand Paul Tard October 24, 2011 at 4:55 pm

Sure, Brazil is similar to Florida, but if you need a vacation from culture and you like crabby old people, it's perfect!

Guppy October 24, 2011 at 5:25 pm

"Florida: for when you wish you had to wear more clothes!"

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:37 pm

Florida: For when you WISH someone would pass a law ensuring OTHER people wear more clothes.

BarackMyWorld October 24, 2011 at 4:34 pm

THEY HATE US FOR OUR FREEDOM!!!!

Ayn Rand Paul Tard October 24, 2011 at 4:50 pm

Your words wound me, but I bet they don't even phase the morons unable to detect the irony.

widestanceshakedown October 24, 2011 at 4:34 pm

Youthful voting is a slippery slope to ghey sechs so Scott's actions saved both lives and souls.

LesBontemps October 24, 2011 at 4:52 pm

Ah, youths, vigorously exercising their franchise, building a muscular democracy in the hot, humid Florida … uh, BRB.

widestanceshakedown October 24, 2011 at 5:08 pm

I think I want to create a job right now.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:37 pm

Me too. Involves mopping up, but hey.

Ayn Rand Paul Tard October 24, 2011 at 4:53 pm

Slippery slope, ghey sechs? Sounds like some of those conservative ski retreats I've heard about.

widestanceshakedown October 24, 2011 at 5:10 pm

The worst thing about a conservative ski retreat would be the view of the slippery slope from the lift. I don't know exactly what that means but it's very dirty.

DaRooster October 24, 2011 at 4:36 pm

Does Florida still have teachers?!? WTF?!?

grandinquisitor October 24, 2011 at 4:39 pm

Well, at least the Tunisians get to have democracy.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:38 pm

Just because *we* can't have it doesn't mean we shouldn't risk our lives to give it to others, right?

iburl October 24, 2011 at 4:39 pm

Teaching kids to vote? What's next? Teaching "science" instead of "creation theory" in the classroom? Obviously this school needs to be shut down and vouchers need to be passed out for the Westboro Baptist Church's new "God Hates You, Scum High".

elviouslyqueer October 24, 2011 at 5:05 pm

America's Finest Christian Betty Bowers approves.

baconzgood October 24, 2011 at 4:40 pm

Unrelated to this post.
http://www.usatoday.com/money/industries/food/sto

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!! BACONZ FREAKIN'!!!!!!!!!

(this comment is 100% snark free)

HogeyeGrex October 24, 2011 at 4:52 pm

And how can it be called a McRib if it doesn't have any bones? Said Fearon

Yes. Because the "Mc" prefix always indicates authenticity.

McJob
McMansion
McHippie
McHooker

Wait…

Naked_Bunny October 24, 2011 at 5:19 pm

How can they call it a hamburger when there's no ham in it?

Sheesh.

baconzgood October 24, 2011 at 7:04 pm

It's authenticity isn't in question as pork…It is what I call S/OrK. Or "SUPER PORK". Imagine if you stuffed the Alvin submersible full of pigs, took them down to 4 miles and opened the hatch for decompression and implosion…..Then you would have 1/3 a McRib.

102415 October 25, 2011 at 2:04 am

Oh baconz, let's have one. Let's have one right now.

fuflans October 24, 2011 at 9:59 pm

how can we not love you so much baconz?

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:41 pm

Please don't eat that, baconz. Please? It's 500 calories PER with an ungodly 29 grams of fat. I can just see your toes pointing skyward after the first bite, as you clutch at your chest and make "Ack! Ack!" Bill-the-Cat-type sounds.

Negropolis October 25, 2011 at 12:32 am

The McRib is an abomination unto the Lord. It is the most processed piece of shit amongst of a menu of overprocessed shit, and I say that as a less-than-sporadic McDonalds customer. They take the meat they use for the burgers, add different seasonings and then mold it into a rib-shaped piece of "food".

Biel_ze_Bubba October 25, 2011 at 12:45 am

I'm guessing McDonald's locked in a good price on scraps, floor sweepings and by-products from the operator of dozens of gigantic pig slaughterhouses. It's the other white meat-like processed food product. ("White" means less than 0.5% Messican fingers and other appendages.)

Naked_Bunny October 24, 2011 at 4:43 pm

Why don't they just cut to the chase and require all voters to incorporate in Florida as an LLC?

Nothingisamiss October 24, 2011 at 4:43 pm

Was there anyone, ANYONE that questioned this law before it was passed?

tihond October 24, 2011 at 4:59 pm

Probably the same people that questioned electing Rick Scott.

SudsMcKenzie October 24, 2011 at 5:26 pm

That Rachele Lezbo person on MSBS.

Nothingisamiss October 24, 2011 at 5:58 pm

Well, there ya go. If she's gonna choose to be a lezbeen, why would anyone listen to her?

SudsMcKenzie October 24, 2011 at 6:53 pm

Patty Keene would know that was a joke.

RadioOcupados October 24, 2011 at 4:43 pm

They should be teaching kids about how to get away with Medicare fraud with a wrist slap.

Jukesgrrl October 24, 2011 at 8:30 pm

Marcus Bachmann's future career.

SoBeach October 24, 2011 at 4:45 pm

"Rick Scott’s entire strategy for handing Florida to the GOP in 2012 is to just paperwork voter registration groups to death…"

Um, republicans have controlled Florida from school boards to county commissions to the state legislature for decades. The only strategy they need in 2012 is to make sure there is an "R" next to the right names on the ballots.

Ayn Rand Paul Tard October 24, 2011 at 4:48 pm

I think the photo comparison is a bit harsh…to Freddy Krueger. I mean he only killed kids who sorta deserved it (thanks to their patriotic vigilante parents, anyway). Whereas I heard Rick allegedly uses the blood of children to replenish his hairless skin and as ritual sacrifices to the Koch bros, which are purely symbolic in gesture.

Mahousu October 24, 2011 at 4:49 pm

I'll bet Jill Cicciarelli probably studied anthropology in college, too. Florida doesn't need her kind.

Chet Kincaid October 24, 2011 at 4:51 pm

The Post will serve it up like so:

A Florida schoolteacher who calls herself "Jill Cicciarelli" is spending more and more of her taxpayer-funded day showing and telling 17-year-olds – many of them impressionable young boys – about adult suffrage. Her recklessness flies in the face of a new law designed to deter this very sort of impropriety.

She says she just "cares about her kids," despite leaving a newborn infant to rush back to the cultivation of trusting and malleable teenage boys, and many girls. But some in the community wonder if she has enticed innocent kids into growing up too fast.

philpjfry October 24, 2011 at 5:28 pm

Perfect

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:43 pm

Ya know, you could make Steve Douchy-type MEGAbux if you'd only sell your soul to Rupie and write this crap. You have a real talent for it.

Chet Kincaid October 25, 2011 at 10:25 am

Thanks….I guess. But I'm only a whore in the chat room.

Limeylizzie October 25, 2011 at 11:55 am

Yes, but you're my whore in the Resistance.

Chet Kincaid October 25, 2011 at 12:00 pm

At your service!

PristinePantalones October 29, 2011 at 7:14 pm

And a perfect gentleman in the boardroom, eh? (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)

Watch out for those New Jersey politicians.

mrblifil October 24, 2011 at 4:51 pm

Scalia lives for moments like this. He's picking out the fishnets he'll wear under his robes at this very moment.

GOPCrusher October 24, 2011 at 5:56 pm

* erp *

SudsMcKenzie October 24, 2011 at 6:36 pm

revre

baconzgood October 24, 2011 at 4:53 pm

I still say he looks like some one you'd cast if Ed Harris had a previous commitment.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:43 pm

Yes, but *where* would you cast him?

chicken_thief October 25, 2011 at 9:42 am

I'm thinking James Carville if Carville was a bigger prick.

weejee October 24, 2011 at 4:57 pm

Mmmm. Sounds more & more that we should give Tejas back to Mexico & give Florida back to Spain.

Rotundo_ October 24, 2011 at 5:14 pm

If we did that, would it mean we have to take all the retired folks in Boca and all the other olds back? New York State couldn't handle the influx (or would that be reflux in this case?). Imagine the border of New Jersey teaming with Caddillacs and Buicks with their turn signals eternally signalling a right turn coming home like grunion to the California beaches. Or to be more accurate like alewives to Milwaukee Harbor.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:44 pm

It takes a REAL man to know a grunion from an alewife, I'll tell ya.

V572-⁂½‡‡‡‡‡ October 24, 2011 at 4:58 pm

What's all this hating on Florida? It looked pretty cool in the movie "Wild Things," with Neve Campbell and Charlie Sheen's ex-GF. Okay there was murder and deceit and stuff, but there was also an awesome threesome.

Oh and that third link is only safe for work in very advanced workplaces, such as mine.

Beetagger October 24, 2011 at 5:00 pm

Jesus Christ on a stick… maybe it's time we all marched in the streets against these people…. oh, we are?

poncho_pilot October 24, 2011 at 5:02 pm

related only in that it involves Florida: this weekend when talking to the wingnut husband of a friend, i told him of the dwarf tossing nonsense in Florida. because this guy is of the louder-equals-more-true school i don't argue with him anymore. i omitted details like the person responsible for the repeal was a Republican. his witty comment? "maybe Obama can take credit for creating jobs."

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:45 pm

And you didn't nut-punch him? Truly, you're a saint.

coolhandnuke October 24, 2011 at 5:08 pm

Rick Scott poached from his favorite movie "Porky's III" to come up with this brilliant legislation.

Blueb4sunrise October 24, 2011 at 5:12 pm

Went looking for the Fla. Law.

"A third-party voter registration organization means any person, entity, or organization that solicits or collects any voter registration application " [except family members and State Elections Pipples]

"Prior to engaging in any voter registration activities, a third-party voter registration organization must ……"
http://election.dos.state.fl.us/voter-registratio

Mort_Sinclair October 24, 2011 at 5:27 pm

But if any state's gonna have a governor like this mutant, it should be Florida. I mean, c'mon. Talk about getting the government ya deserve. That said, Florida should be amputated as if it were this country's vestigial tail.

owhatever October 24, 2011 at 5:28 pm

It is very simple. White male landowners can vote. Got it now?

chicken_thief October 25, 2011 at 9:45 am

Blacks still count as "property", right?

johnnyzhivago October 24, 2011 at 5:29 pm

If you don''t have a Wealth Management Account at Merrill Lynch why would you think you're entitled to voting???

SudsMcKenzie October 24, 2011 at 5:30 pm

So, Marco Rubio's parents turned their Buick into a floating car, and floated their car to FL, then turned around and went back to Cuba, only to turn their car around and head back to FL for this?

Chet Kincaid October 24, 2011 at 5:34 pm

Sounds like B-52s lyrics. I can hear crazy Fred now. "I've got me a Buick, it's a floating car, and we're sailing off to FLAaaaa!!"

HistoriCat October 24, 2011 at 5:39 pm

Your move Arizona.

Jukesgrrl October 24, 2011 at 8:36 pm

Just don't suggest that any of these morans move TO Arizona.

HistoriCat October 24, 2011 at 9:35 pm

No – they would probably stop halfway there … and Texas has enough problems as it is.

poorgradstudent October 24, 2011 at 6:34 pm

So this is what they really mean by "small government"? I guess if you define "government" as the "people" it makes more sense…

DashboardBuddha October 24, 2011 at 6:40 pm

George Wallace is right now taking a break from running his wheelchair wash franchise in hell to say, "Fuck! Why didn't I think of that?"

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:50 pm

Where's @Biel_ze_Bubba when you *need* him?

mavenmaven October 24, 2011 at 6:42 pm

Here is how Rick Scott's civics classes are to be structured from now on: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bs5bnVoZK4Q&fe

emmelemm October 24, 2011 at 6:48 pm

OK, seriously: Never, EVER, under any circumstances, allow your eyes to pass over YouTube comments. Holocaust deniers ahoy!

mavenmaven October 24, 2011 at 8:13 pm

Rightists are attracted to this kind of thing like zombies to living flesh, which is more than a metaphor.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:55 pm

Oy! The hate is strong in them!

ProudLibunatic October 24, 2011 at 7:04 pm

Should be required viewing for the idiots that compare Obama to Hitler.
I hate how all the facile comparisons have watered down how terrifying Hitler really was.
(Sorry for lack of snark.)

Antispandex October 24, 2011 at 7:13 pm

Thank goodness she didn't tell them that their vote doesn't count anyway ( in Florida at least), because I am pretty sure the wingers have outlawed telling the truth since way back during that whole 2000 election thingy.

mrbubb October 24, 2011 at 7:21 pm

I would happily pay an alligator to (slowly) devour this dickhead.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:56 pm

I will add my small pile of coins to yours to pay for this entertainment.

chicken_thief October 25, 2011 at 9:47 am

mrbubb – private sector jerb creator!!!

Schmegeg October 24, 2011 at 7:24 pm

Let's give VoldeRick a one way ticket to Tripoli, there is an opening there.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:56 pm

Haven't the Libyans suffered *enough*?

Callyson October 24, 2011 at 7:31 pm

Dear Future (eventually) Florida Voters:
Please notice who turned your teacher into a criminal, and why he did so. Then vote. Don't leave any hanging chads.
Thank You,
The American People

crybabyboehner October 24, 2011 at 8:06 pm

Brought to you by the people who invented Dwarf Tossing.

x111e7thst October 24, 2011 at 8:13 pm

Are these students male landowners of the white anglo-saxon protestant persuasion? (Jill Cicciarelli? Need I say more?). Obviously neither our founding fathers nor supply side jeebus want that sort of riff-raff voting.

ttommyunger October 24, 2011 at 8:21 pm

I keep checking out the photos… Strangely, I would rather have a beer with Freddy than Rick. This comment is 100% snark-free.

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:57 pm

Um … how about not having a beer with EITHER of them, dood?

ttommyunger October 25, 2011 at 10:36 am

Good idea!

Jukesgrrl October 24, 2011 at 8:38 pm

In think I hear someone calling for Jill Cicciarelli's long-form birf certificutz.

lulzmonger October 24, 2011 at 9:42 pm

Voter-registration drives are the Panzers of Liberal Fascism!

comrad_darkness October 24, 2011 at 10:07 pm

>Among other things, the new rules require that third parties who sign up new voters register with the state and that they submit applications within 48 hours.

Oh, those republicans and their smaller government . . .

PristinePantalones October 24, 2011 at 11:24 pm

*Legions*? I understand the sonofabitch ain't real popular in FL right now. I could be wrong, but it don't look that way.

anteater October 25, 2011 at 12:19 am

You had me at 'grim hairless weasel'.
Was Madonna a Cicciarelli? or was that the porn star?
Next round's on me !!

Negropolis October 25, 2011 at 12:37 am

Florida is covered under the Voting Rights Act, right? A good lawsuit should take care of this "law" real quick-like, and god knows there are some good (and lots of) lawyers in Florida.

Limeylizzie October 25, 2011 at 11:59 am

I hope you are correct, because I am completely gobsmacked by all of this voter suppression.

HogeyeGrex October 25, 2011 at 3:30 am

Not legally, though there's some wiggle room in Rhode Island.

My problem is, well, dammit, I'm supposed to be the one in the clown suit.

Limeylizzie October 25, 2011 at 12:05 pm

Oh, I was thinking of you the other day when I saw a preview for the Tuskegee Airmen movie, I was a bit underwhelmed by the looks of it, but maybe it will be good.

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