ho-hum another one of these

NJ GOP Mayor Has ‘No Idea’ How Rentboy Got Sexy Pictures of Him

These kids and their photoshopz!Ah, the old “probably it was some guy who broke into my hotel room and took pictures of me sleeping in my underwear” excuse. Medford, New Jersey mayor Chris Myers is here to fill the weekly news slot reserved for the outing of one or another garden variety self-loathing, escort-loving closeted Republican politician with a weak claim that he is totally clueless as to how a California rentboy got all those photos of Myers and his magical Superman-sized briefs asleep in a hotel bed (along with pictures of his IDs and his cell phone number). Or, uh, Photoshop maybe? Probably it was the terrorists with their Photoshop.

The photos appeared on a website started by the anonymous angry California rentboy, who claims the straight-married father of two inexplicably offered to buy him a car and then didn’t follow through on the promise. (Note to rentboy: “politician” is the top thesaurus-listed antonym for “promise keeper,” what were you expecting?)

Here is the weird denial Myers gave to PhillyBurbs.com:

Myers also said he has been to California and many other places around the world on business, but he couldn’t say whether he was there in October 2010 when the alleged incident occurred.

Myers said he wasn’t even sure the photos were of him and wondered if they had been altered.

“I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said, declining to provide specifics.

He said the bag with his identification in it was easily accessible and that someone could have sneaked into his hotel room to capture him sleeping and take photos of his personal ID cards and badge.

“I just don’t know. There are crazy people and I’m not going to justify craziness,” he said.

Myers is also declining to have the matter investigated, to save the anonymous rentboy the embarrassment, probably. [PhillyBurbs.com]

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    1. chicken_thief

      Rumors abound that there was an attempted blackmail attempt on Christie with photos of him eating tofu.

    2. Chet Kincaid

      It would take the rent boy 90 minutes to find his sad little prawn, and an auto jack to prop Christie up for service. A gas mask would also be recommended. I'd advise demanding time-and-a-half, plus workman's comp protection.

    3. tessiee

      "It could worse, the pictures could be of Chris Christie."

      Having sex with Rush Limbaugh on a bed with red satin sheets.

  1. Barb

    "and wondered if they had been altered…."
    Trust me, these pictures could use a good altering. Gentlemen, set your airbrushes to STUN!

    1. bureaucrap

      Actually, Photoshop stops working if the image it is working on becomes too horrific. Proving absolutely that this image was NOT photoshopped.

  2. Generation[redacted]

    Please don't make me look at that picture. Can't you replace it with a funny 1980s comedy skit, like you did with Gaddafi?

    1. SorosBot

      And also without covers and with my hands folded behind my head, yep that guy certainly looks asleep to me.

      1. Generation[redacted]

        Obviously the glasses were photoshopped in and the blankets were removed with the erase tool. Look closely at the shadows on his crotch and you can tell. Ha! Made you look!

      2. Barb

        He's channeling David Hasselhoff from Baywatch and sucking in his gut too.
        Wonder what kind of car he promised to buy rent boy? I'm thinking a Probe.

          1. SorosBot

            That can be his excuse! "I fell asleep with my glasses on and no covers because I was wasted and passed out, that's also why I didn't notice the guy sneaking into my hotel room to take pictures of me!"

        1. tessiee

          "He's channeling David Hasselhoff from Baywatch and sucking in his gut too."

          Not doing a very good job of it.

    2. SarahsBush

      I actually do this. It should be noted that I am also a heavy drinker. I will likely be doing this again in 5-10 minutes.

  3. An_Outhouse

    I've been many places for "business" too, now that I know that is what they're calling it these days.

  4. fartknocker

    That's just fucking gross. Speedos and Mr. Scientist glasses? Really Wonkette, is this what your going to make us look at everytime we need our weekend Wonkette fix?

    Kourtney wouldn't do him and neither would her veggies.

    1. Rotundo_

      Yeah, he looks a bit like a cleaned up version of the "Goofy Area 51 scientist" from Independence Day played so well by Brent Spiner. Almost as visually appealing too. (Eww).

  5. memzilla

    The white foreground of the picture, the sheets, indicates the picture was taken with a flash. No, a flash attachment wouldn't disturb my sleep either, any more than flashbulbs disturbed King Kong.

      1. V572-⁂½‡‡‡‡‡

        State-legislative Cocktober just isn't as satisfying as Congressional Cocktober, though. Needs a higher-level legislative body, if you know what I mean.

      1. Biel_ze_Bubba

        The Hunt for …. meh. I got nuttin.

        "Legends Are Made in Cocktober" might catch on, memewise.

  6. Eve8Apples

    Thanks Wonkette! You just saved me 10 dollars on lunch and about 700 calories. I'll be in the bathroom douching my eyes with bleach if you need me.

  7. Goonemeritus

    As a New Yorker I doff my cap to the Garden State. Well done and thanks again for joining the party.

  8. justkillmenow

    Myers also said he has been to California and many other places around the world on business, but he couldn’t say whether he was there in October 2010 when the alleged incident occurred.

    He can't look back on his calendar and see if there were meetings scheduled in California? I'm a nobody where I work and yet I can look back several years and tell you if I was in another state. Thankfully, no naked hotel pics, but I'm not a closeted male republican either.

    1. finallyhappy

      oh, yeah, I was also a nobody(well, less of one than you) but also had to keep my travel records for years- plus our administrator had to keep copies of everyone's travel- and sometimes our IG office would want to investigate. .

    2. tessiee

      "I can look back several years and tell you if I was in another state. Thankfully, no naked hotel pics"

      Aww. Killjoy.

  9. baconzgood

    "He said the bag with his identification in it was easily accessible and that someone could have sneaked into his hotel room to capture him sleeping and take photos of his personal ID cards and badge."

    Did you buy that?…OK then how about this excuse…

    1. MaxNeanderthal

      On a par with "Honest Doc, I slipped on the floor and there was this baseball bat standing upright alone on that same floor, and that's how it came to be inserted to the full length of my descending colon, etc. etc. "
      You get the picture…….

  10. hagajim

    It's a bird, it's a plane….naw, it's just another closeted gay Republican denying he likes it in the ass.

    1. Pristine_ODummy

      When you're on the down-low, looking for a little discreet bumfuckery, pay is the way to go. Of course, his bf turned out to be not-so-discreet, but he must not have paid enough.

  11. jaytingle

    “Promise Keeper” is the second thesaurus-listed antonym for “promise keeper,” referring to the Christian man-guy group.

  12. chascates

    Obama now live announcing troop wilthdrawals from Iraq by the end of the year.
    "After nearly 9 years…"

    Afghanistan, not so much.

  13. baconzgood


    (What kinda 40+ year old guy wears turquoise banana hammocks?)

    1. MissTaken

      You'd be amazed. I dated a guy earlier this year (46 yo) who had not only turquoise but also purple banana hammocks. He said he wore them on "special" occasions. By special he meant those few random times he would have sex with a woman.

        1. MissTaken

          Sadly I'm missing some bits that he actually likes to have sexy-time with, specifically a penis and testicles.

  14. not that Dewey

    California is so starved for hot celebrity action that any time the mayor of Palookaville shows up, TMZ is all over it like gravy on waffles.

    1. poncho_pilot

      which is coincidentally, an apt description of events that occurred on the night this photo was taken.

  15. Neoyorquino

    Myers said he wasn’t even sure the photos were of him and wondered if they had been altered.

    “Those are definitely not my Underoos™. Mine have Spider-Man on them,” he said, declining to provide specifics.

  16. Crank_Tango

    Talk about documentation! And something tells me, that outie bellybutton is gonna out him in the end…

  17. SayItWithWookies

    So he's saying that someone just tried to randomly blackmail him? Oh, of course — because if I was going to extort money from someone, I'd go straight to the mayor of some town in New Jersey I'd never heard of — everyone knows those local public servants are the ones making the real killing in this economy.

    1. zappadoo76

      It was blackmail. Not "random." Not chosen in advance either. The rentboy decided to blackmail the mayor the moment he found out who he was. The mayor wouldn't give him what he asked for (BMW, recording equipment), so now the rentboy is outing him. That is as obvious to me as the nose on my face, which I can actually see if I look into the corner of my eye.

      1. SayItWithWookies

        Come on, who are you going to believe — the honest, hardworking family-values Republican politician, or some sleazy Californian who just happens to have tons of naked pictures of him?

  18. OneYieldRegular

    Justifying Craziness Option #47: Maybe he was just re-enacting that Seinfeld episode where George gets some boudoir photos taken?

    1. Chichikovovich

      That means the non-moronic business owners see an opening and they're making their move. Darwin+Capitalism WIN!

  19. thefrontpage

    Recent ad in The Village Voice Personals:

    Medford, N.J. Hot mid-aged politico playah type lookin' fer good times with crazy rentboy types. Middle-aged, paunchy, very white, glasses, chubby, pale, balding, overweight, not exactly GQ model Adonis Hercules type!! Looking to meet and discuss politics, hotel rooms, underwear, flash photography, ethics, the art of denial, delusions, severe delusions, slight craziness, possible conflicting homosexual tendencies, desires and urges, homosexuality and the Republican politician, homosexuality and hypocrisy, prostitution, photoshopping, computers, online ads and the socio-political ramifications of stated conservative Republican politicians railing against homosexuality while actually engaging in homosexual behavior at the same time. Should be fun! Contact Chris Myers, Medford.

  20. bureaucrap

    "Probably it was the terrorists with their Photoshop."

    Yes, because the Mayor of Medford Twp, NJ (pop. 22, 253) has always been perceived by the Taliban as a threat to Afgani tribal sovereignty.

  21. MissTaken

    Myers is just demonstrating how right Mitsch was when saying that ladies need to be whore in the bedroom – complete with tight panties and high thread count sheets.

  22. Antispandex

    When Anthony Weiner tried this excuse, the media went crazy. But, then again he was a Democrat cruising for some strange and not a Family Values Party guy. Besides, the approved Fox News version of escaping this type of charge is, 1.) He was set up. 2.) I won't dignify that with a response / we've talked this to death and I have nothing more to add, or 3.) Everyone does it, what's the big deal? All may need to be used here…before he resigns.

          1. FrenchTwist40

            Depends on his rate, I suppose. I can't imagine that the Mayor of Medford, NJ gets paid enough to order rentboys by the week and get the bulk discount.

    1. zappadoo76

      Ant'ny was on the teevee a lot, too. Getting interviewed in front of faux Greek pillars and stuff in the Capitol. The mayor is just some guy.

    2. Biel_ze_Bubba

      Don't forget 4.) "My Democrat opponents are just trying to distract the public from the real issues."

  23. Indiepalin

    Headline of the day (Foxnews):

    "Michele Bachmann's Entire Paid Staff in New Hampshire Reportedly Has Quit "

    "If we go much longer without seeing her, she's going to turn up on milk cartons"

    Batshit Begins

  24. bureaucrap

    "The [rentboy] said Myers identified himself as a mayor from New Jersey and offered his township identification card and gold ID shield as proof during the early-morning meeting "

    What I really love about these GOP closet cases is that they seem to be compelled to identify themselves as "VIPs" even in situations where common sense would counsel a modicum of discretion. Perhaps they think they will get free/discounted services from rentboys just by flashing their business card. Which makes me think that a rentboy who advertises "Free BJs for All GOP elected officials" could make A LOT of money.

    1. tessiee

      The rentboys could actually *give* free BJs and *still* make a lot of money, by blackmailing the dumb bastards.

  25. Mahousu

    “I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said
    … referring to the pictures of his penis he had posted on Craigslist.

  26. littlebigdaddy

    “I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said, declining to provide specifics."

    Yeah, haven't we all?

  27. BornInATrailer

    Is that the bald, gay friend of Carrie's from Sex and the City? And why does that question pop into my brain? Damn that wife of mine.

  28. fuflans

    We're a happy family
    We're a happy family
    We're a happy family
    Me mom and daddy

    Siting here in Queens
    Eating refried beans
    We're in all the magazines
    Gulpin' down thorazines

    We ain't got no friends
    Our troubles never end
    No Christmas cards to send
    Daddy likes men.

    today, in punk lyrics.

  29. seppdecker

    “I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said.

    Republicans may not create any jobs, but they make a fuckton of comedy.

  30. Beowoof

    From reading the article I would say the mayor is taking a wide stance to avoid stepping in his own bullshit. "It's not working mayor you can't get your legs that far apart.

  31. Terry

    "“I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said, declining to provide specifics."

    Yes, there is a seeeekrit plot against the mayor of Medford, NJ. Daniel Craig will play Myers in the movie version.

  32. user-of-owls

    [In a Public Relations class on 'Damage Control' ten years from now]

    "And so we see that in retrospect, Chris Myers' decision to release copies of his passport to the press in order to refute claims that he was in California at the time proved to be ill-advised. A skilled PR agent would have alerted Myers that the nearly two dozen stamps indicating trips to Thailand might prove detrimental to the mayor's public image."

    1. GregComlish

      Ummm… I do.

      Not really sure where else I should put it. Gold is in a bubble. Asian market is in a bubble. Europe is fucked. Possibly looking at a double dip recession that could hit domestic stocks hard. Never really been a bond man myself. I'd consider real estate, but I'm too worried about job security to settle down.

      Guess I could just buy more energy futures but, I do like to keep some liquidity and not get excessive commodity exposure, which also could fluctuate during a double dip.

      1. 102415

        I feel the same. I can't put it under the bed. I have a lot of dividend stocks already. If everything crashes it crashes we will all be fucked. I suppose I should stock up on hobo beans. Wait, maybe I should sell hobo beans. Didn't James Dean do pretty well selling beans in "East of Eden"?

  33. Chet Kincaid

    “Few things are impossible, but it is very difficult to identify the ultimate source,” [His lawyer] said. “If I could, I would sue him or her, but he or she can hide behind the anonymity of the Internet. I would be suing a ghost.”

    What kind of fool doesn't know that is a complete lie?

  34. prommie

    He was a "missile expert" in the Navy. Whoo-hoooo! Worked for a missile defense contractor; he must have been the man behind the famous "heat seeking moisture missile."

    1. Jukesgrrl

      I used to work for some engineers who (seriously) referred to themselves as "erection specialists."

  35. Chet Kincaid

    "Hello Mayor, this is Marcus Bachmann. While you are a bit older than my typical client, there is an experimental treatment we can try with a transfusion from a young ex-Gay…"

  36. prommie

    Its obvious now, isn't it, that he has a secret, evil, gay twin? Surely thats the most logical explanation, his secret, evil, gay twin periodically drugs him and then runs rampant in the world, impersonating him, and doing all kinds of homo and gay stuff everywhere, with rentboys and everything, and then the secret evil gay twin disappears, and poor Chris wakes up and has to deal with the aftermath. Secret evil gay twin is probably in cahoots with the rentboy, trying to extort a nice Mazda3 or a low mileage Chrysler Neon out of him. Who among us hasn't been down that road, in truth?

  37. owhatever

    Operation Mayor was a clean success, Chief. We drugged his room-service hamburger, then the whole team made an entry. We copied all of his documents on our XE36-1 secreted decoder rings and arranged him in various positions for incriminating photographs. Then we pulled out. He never knew what happened. We own him now and therefore, we own Medford.

    1. tessiee

      Thinking about Republican men having sex…
      Thinking about Republican men…
      Thinking about Republicans…

  38. Callyson

    Editor’s note: The newspaper has a responsibility and duty to inform you about significant issues involving our public officials. That is why we are publishing this story.
    Oh, come on, PhillyBurbs…at least admit that you found this salacious story too good to pass up…

  39. Dok-cupy Everything

    So THAT'S what happened to Dr. Tobias Fünke. I see he's lost the mustache, but he's still a never-nude.

      1. Pristine_ODummy

        I don't know where you read about the rubber chicken, but that's not what's served at Republican fuckfests. IIRC, the last teabagger party they threw themselves (back when they still had money) featured steak and lobster, which apparently really pissed off the hoveround-riding rank and file Poorz they somehow suckered into joining their "party."

        Good times, good times!

  40. luke_warm

    I find it enjoyable when self-hating hypocrites who've been in favor of a whole anti-gay bigoted agenda get outed, but this guy seems to have positioned himself as a moderate republican who was against don't ask, don't tell, so I'm wondering what the uproar is about here. Is it just that he's gay?

    1. Jukesgrrl

      I have no problem with him being gay. I care about his carelessness in embarrassing his wife and kids if they didn't know about his extracurricular activities, especially if they were used as props to advance whatever political career one has being mayor of a New Jersey hamlet. But you have a valid point. Innocent until proven guilty. Maybe the kids knew about Dad romping with rent boys in his Underoos.

  41. Callyson

    Oh, and the piece de resistance, from the rentboy's website: Mr Mayor likes red flavored lube (scroll to the bottom of the webpage for that gem)…

      1. user-of-owls

        Red-flavored is what the 'marinara' sauce in the school cafeteria was. It was awful, but not nearly as bad as the gray-flavored 'meat.'

        1. tessiee

          They have (or used to have) something in the midwest called "red pop" (i.e., soda). You know it's bad when they're not even pretending to have a flavor instead of a color. It's like saying "chocolate colored milkshake".

          1. user-of-owls

            aka, 'brown milk.'

            The Peruvians have taken the 'red pop' in a rather unsettling direction with Inca Kola, whose palish yellow hue is reminiscent…oh, just look at it.

          2. tessiee

            Sorry, my friend, but no retractions are in order. Having lived in Ann Arbor for two years, I'm a former Michigander (or, as I like to call it, Mishugenah) myself, and I can state without fear of contradiction that Faygo absolutely did make something called "Red Pop", and it was on the shelves of every supermarket.

  42. HolyCow!!

    I couldn't tell you how many times that has happened to me. There are some real perverts out there! And they all have cameras too. Damn bitchez.

  43. YouBetcha

    I have done some obscene, terryfing things, and no one has ever offered me a car.

    Stupid gay GOP. Aren't there any straight ones? My lame hippie hybrid vehicle is beginning to make funny noises.

  44. FlexPerks

    Oh interesting! I just stumbled upon an June 2010 US News and World Report which mentioned Christie and Nikki Haley as possible 2012 preznit candidates. We laugh but watch the heck out for Haley, she's bad news in a teabag and she'll be comin' at ya.

    1. Jukesgrrl

      I've been saying she's Vice Presidential gold if Romney is nominated. He will have to get a certified bagger who will appear to diversify the ticket. Surely he's not going for Bachmann or Palin, Rubio says he's out, and America's already seen too much of Piyush Jindal. When they find the body of that guy who says she did him in a car, you'll know it's goin' down.

  45. EBGrey

    NJ GOPer, Phil Mitsch, said that a woman should strive to be "a lady in the living room and a whore in the bedroom." The good mayor was merely pointing out that the addage goes both ways…ahem.

  46. JackObin

    Mmmmmm. Sexy undies and eye glasses. Little Georgie Will must be in his glory, with the World Series and all, I mean.

  47. marinmaven

    I am thinking of quote I saw here once about mini-Hillary Clinton, "What has been seen, can't be unseen." How can I unsee this? Is there a series of keys i can press?

    Why don't you be good, and put a picture of our president in a bathing suit looking cool and cut in Hawaii. You know the one I am talking about. Mommy is going to get a cocktail now.

    1. tessiee

      "Why don't you be good, and put a picture of our president in a bathing suit looking cool and cut in Hawaiii"

      *retreats upstairs with Cocktober issue of "Brainy Guys"*

  48. GorzoTheMighty

    This and Phil Mitsch in one day?. I can't take anymore (sound of gunshot and something hitting the floor)

  49. UW8316154

    I went to investigate the rentboy's evidence, to see for myself, as it were, and am deeply saddened that the website is no longer available. maybe he got that Probe he wanted, after all.

  50. ttommyunger

    Thoughtful of him not to get shots of the flip-side. Skidmarks would still show up on that baby blue and you know there are skidmarks on this boy's skivvies.

  51. voodooeconomics

    The gentleman in the picture has a lower back problem. The positioning of his right leg, just so, indicates that some of the spinal cartilage in the lower back needs adjustments. The blue garment helps with relaxation and the glasses afford a complete situation awareness, if he must be awaken by a sudden poke.

  52. a_pink_poodle

    Jee wizz what a shocker. A GOP politician caught getting gay with a male prostitute YAWN

    Do you think there'll ever be a GOP politician caught getting straight with a female prostitute one of these days?

  53. HistoriCat

    That image is very disturbing. I wish you’d have chosen something else. I realize that it’s a shameful part of American history that we should never forget, but it’s too much.

    (Sheesh – two days and no one posted this? Slackers.)

  54. JumpySnark

    Well, those may be "his magical Superman-sized briefs," but it would appear that SOMETHING is not exactly Superman-sized (if you know what I mean, and I think you do)!

  55. stribs

    At first I thought that was George Costanza in a famous scene from Seinfeld. But, no,it's just another anti-gay GOP elected official busted in a rent boy scandal. Anyone keeping a list of all these guys? Must be getting pretty long.

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