HO-HUM ANOTHER ONE OF THESE  12:38 pm October 21, 2011

NJ GOP Mayor Has ‘No Idea’ How Rentboy Got Sexy Pictures of Him

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

These kids and their photoshopz!Ah, the old “probably it was some guy who broke into my hotel room and took pictures of me sleeping in my underwear” excuse. Medford, New Jersey mayor Chris Myers is here to fill the weekly news slot reserved for the outing of one or another garden variety self-loathing, escort-loving closeted Republican politician with a weak claim that he is totally clueless as to how a California rentboy got all those photos of Myers and his magical Superman-sized briefs asleep in a hotel bed (along with pictures of his IDs and his cell phone number). Or, uh, Photoshop maybe? Probably it was the terrorists with their Photoshop.

The photos appeared on a website started by the anonymous angry California rentboy, who claims the straight-married father of two inexplicably offered to buy him a car and then didn’t follow through on the promise. (Note to rentboy: “politician” is the top thesaurus-listed antonym for “promise keeper,” what were you expecting?)

Here is the weird denial Myers gave to PhillyBurbs.com:

Myers also said he has been to California and many other places around the world on business, but he couldn’t say whether he was there in October 2010 when the alleged incident occurred.

Myers said he wasn’t even sure the photos were of him and wondered if they had been altered.

“I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said, declining to provide specifics.

He said the bag with his identification in it was easily accessible and that someone could have sneaked into his hotel room to capture him sleeping and take photos of his personal ID cards and badge.

“I just don’t know. There are crazy people and I’m not going to justify craziness,” he said.

Myers is also declining to have the matter investigated, to save the anonymous rentboy the embarrassment, probably. [PhillyBurbs.com]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 288 comments }

nounverb911 October 21, 2011 at 11:40 am

It could worse, the pictures could be of Chris Christie.

ManchuCandidate October 21, 2011 at 12:42 pm

Seen one Hutt naked (Jabba), seen'em all.

An_Outhouse October 21, 2011 at 12:43 pm

They would need a panoramic camera or a fish eye lens or something.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 7:21 pm

Try a whale eye. Fisheyes don't go that wide.

hagajim October 21, 2011 at 12:45 pm

ARRRRGGGGHHHHH!

Blueb4sunrise October 21, 2011 at 1:03 pm

That was EXACTLY my reaction.

writechic October 21, 2011 at 1:04 pm

Triple wide lens, please.

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:00 pm

Preferably shatterproof.

DashboardBuddha October 21, 2011 at 1:07 pm

aaaand there goes my lunch.

chicken_thief October 21, 2011 at 1:14 pm

Rumors abound that there was an attempted blackmail attempt on Christie with photos of him eating tofu.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 7:21 pm

With both hands out of a giant bucket.

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:01 pm

Followed by a whaffer-thin mint.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 11:55 pm

Christie doesn't allow ANYTHING thin around him.

imissopus October 21, 2011 at 1:15 pm

DO NOT WANT

starfanglednut October 21, 2011 at 1:41 pm

Eye bleach! Eye bleach!

BelleSC October 21, 2011 at 1:50 pm

^ Ditto

chascates October 21, 2011 at 1:44 pm

with Rush Limbaugh.

Dok-cupy Everything October 21, 2011 at 2:20 pm
Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 7:22 pm

Ew. I should know better, with you.

Fortunately, I managed to get away in time.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 7:22 pm

That was truly cruel and hateful. I might just have to come get your autograph.

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 2:27 pm

It would take the rent boy 90 minutes to find his sad little prawn, and an auto jack to prop Christie up for service. A gas mask would also be recommended. I'd advise demanding time-and-a-half, plus workman's comp protection.

FrenchTwist40 October 21, 2011 at 4:51 pm

"Sad Little Prawn" is a phrase I am adopting and will overuse for the forseeable future.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 7:23 pm

"Sad little prawn" FTW!

Walkinwiddaking October 21, 2011 at 8:10 pm

Hey, hey. Let's not get ugly here.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 11:56 pm

Too late.

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:00 pm

"It could worse, the pictures could be of Chris Christie."

Having sex with Rush Limbaugh on a bed with red satin sheets.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 11:57 pm

AAAARRRGH!! NO! My eyes, my eyes!

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 11:45 am

The goggles do nothing!

Barb October 21, 2011 at 12:41 pm

"and wondered if they had been altered…."
Trust me, these pictures could use a good altering. Gentlemen, set your airbrushes to STUN!

bureaucrap October 21, 2011 at 1:22 pm

Actually, Photoshop stops working if the image it is working on becomes too horrific. Proving absolutely that this image was NOT photoshopped.

Generation[redacted] October 21, 2011 at 12:41 pm

Please don't make me look at that picture. Can't you replace it with a funny 1980s comedy skit, like you did with Gaddafi?

Fare la Volpe October 21, 2011 at 1:34 pm

Okay, but I highly doubt you'll enjoy that episode of Growing Pains…

boobookitteh October 21, 2011 at 12:42 pm

I also frequently sleep in my glasses with my legs open. Very comfy.

SorosBot October 21, 2011 at 12:44 pm

And also without covers and with my hands folded behind my head, yep that guy certainly looks asleep to me.

Generation[redacted] October 21, 2011 at 1:03 pm

Obviously the glasses were photoshopped in and the blankets were removed with the erase tool. Look closely at the shadows on his crotch and you can tell. Ha! Made you look!

Barb October 21, 2011 at 1:19 pm

He's channeling David Hasselhoff from Baywatch and sucking in his gut too.
Wonder what kind of car he promised to buy rent boy? I'm thinking a Probe.

OneDollarJuana October 21, 2011 at 1:31 pm

Is he channeling David Hasselhoff by sucking in booze-juice, too?

SorosBot October 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

That can be his excuse! "I fell asleep with my glasses on and no covers because I was wasted and passed out, that's also why I didn't notice the guy sneaking into my hotel room to take pictures of me!"

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 11:46 am

"He's channeling David Hasselhoff from Baywatch and sucking in his gut too."

Not doing a very good job of it.

SarahsBush October 22, 2011 at 3:43 am

I actually do this. It should be noted that I am also a heavy drinker. I will likely be doing this again in 5-10 minutes.

An_Outhouse October 21, 2011 at 12:42 pm

I've been many places for "business" too, now that I know that is what they're calling it these days.

nounverb911 October 21, 2011 at 12:43 pm

GOP'er gets elected, GOP'er gets into scandal. Never a miscommunication. You cannot explain that.

RedneckMuslin October 21, 2011 at 12:48 pm

Rentboy goes in, Rentboy goes out. I can't explain it. But it feels soooo good.

emmelemm October 21, 2011 at 2:21 pm

Best.

Biel_ze_Bubba October 21, 2011 at 3:21 pm

Close the comment list. We're done here.

Negropolis October 22, 2011 at 12:23 am

/thread

jaytingle October 21, 2011 at 12:43 pm

And may I be the first to say, "Yum."

hagajim October 21, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Yum yum, bum cum!

snackypants October 21, 2011 at 12:51 pm

Yum yum bum cum…santorum!

Chichikovovich October 21, 2011 at 1:05 pm

on the floorum?

Fare la Volpe October 21, 2011 at 1:32 pm

That's poor decorum.

GunToting[Redacted] October 21, 2011 at 1:13 pm

And, very likely, the last.

ibwilliamsi October 21, 2011 at 2:05 pm

And you're also the last to say, "Yum".

fartknocker October 21, 2011 at 12:43 pm

That's just fucking gross. Speedos and Mr. Scientist glasses? Really Wonkette, is this what your going to make us look at everytime we need our weekend Wonkette fix?

Kourtney wouldn't do him and neither would her veggies.

ManchuCandidate October 21, 2011 at 12:45 pm

I suspect the feeling (Mr Speedo Science's feelings on Kourtney) is mutual.

Biel_ze_Bubba October 21, 2011 at 3:23 pm

How he feels about her zucchini is another matter.

Rotundo_ October 21, 2011 at 7:46 pm

Yeah, he looks a bit like a cleaned up version of the "Goofy Area 51 scientist" from Independence Day played so well by Brent Spiner. Almost as visually appealing too. (Eww).

FNMA October 21, 2011 at 12:44 pm

Jesus Christ, some of us are trying to eat lunch here!

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:42 pm

Were.

memzilla October 21, 2011 at 12:44 pm

The white foreground of the picture, the sheets, indicates the picture was taken with a flash. No, a flash attachment wouldn't disturb my sleep either, any more than flashbulbs disturbed King Kong.

franco_pinyon October 21, 2011 at 6:28 pm

Hahaha… good point!

hagajim October 21, 2011 at 12:45 pm

"Medford, New Jersey mayor Chris Myers is here to fill the weekly news ass slot." – Fixed.

SorosBot October 21, 2011 at 12:45 pm

Happy Cocktober, everyone!

snackypants October 21, 2011 at 12:52 pm

Finally a Cocktober surprise!

V572-⁂½‡‡‡‡‡ October 21, 2011 at 1:02 pm

State-legislative Cocktober just isn't as satisfying as Congressional Cocktober, though. Needs a higher-level legislative body, if you know what I mean.

Biel_ze_Bubba October 21, 2011 at 3:25 pm

Someone needs a higher-level body, that's for sure.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:45 pm

I can't wait for Blowvember. What comes after, again?

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:06 pm

Swallowing?

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 11:58 pm

Tessiee, you SLUT! OMG.

I *meant* what month!

Fare la Volpe October 21, 2011 at 1:30 pm

It's a Cocktober Miracle!

Schmannnity October 21, 2011 at 1:42 pm

The Boys of Cocktober.

Biel_ze_Bubba October 21, 2011 at 3:28 pm

The Hunt for …. meh. I got nuttin.

"Legends Are Made in Cocktober" might catch on, memewise.

Buzz Feedback October 21, 2011 at 12:45 pm

Those 800 thread count sheets guarantee he's teh ghey.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:46 pm

The fact that you could tell the thread count from that distance is kinda suspishus, too. Also.

chascates October 21, 2011 at 12:45 pm

Oh, eventually he'll find a way to 'justify craziness'.

chicken_thief October 21, 2011 at 1:18 pm

Myers' calendar lists "car shopping" for all of this weekend.

Eve8Apples October 21, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Thanks Wonkette! You just saved me 10 dollars on lunch and about 700 calories. I'll be in the bathroom douching my eyes with bleach if you need me.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:47 pm

Take-away lesson: no eating while reading Teh Wonketz.

Goonemeritus October 21, 2011 at 12:46 pm

As a New Yorker I doff my cap to the Garden State. Well done and thanks again for joining the party.

chicken_thief October 21, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Jim McGreevy also gives a big thumbs up.

OneDollarJuana October 21, 2011 at 1:32 pm

The "Garden" State is where you get a tossed salad, apparently.

MaxNeanderthal October 21, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Just tossed my cookies at that…..

justkillmenow October 21, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Myers also said he has been to California and many other places around the world on business, but he couldn’t say whether he was there in October 2010 when the alleged incident occurred.

He can't look back on his calendar and see if there were meetings scheduled in California? I'm a nobody where I work and yet I can look back several years and tell you if I was in another state. Thankfully, no naked hotel pics, but I'm not a closeted male republican either.

Rosie_Scenario October 21, 2011 at 1:06 pm

Credit card charges may help jog his memory. But that would be craziness.

finallyhappy October 21, 2011 at 3:16 pm

oh, yeah, I was also a nobody(well, less of one than you) but also had to keep my travel records for years- plus our administrator had to keep copies of everyone's travel- and sometimes our IG office would want to investigate. .

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:09 pm

"I can look back several years and tell you if I was in another state. Thankfully, no naked hotel pics"

Aww. Killjoy.

baconzgood October 21, 2011 at 12:46 pm

"He said the bag with his identification in it was easily accessible and that someone could have sneaked into his hotel room to capture him sleeping and take photos of his personal ID cards and badge."

Did you buy that?…OK then how about this excuse…

Generation[redacted] October 21, 2011 at 1:25 pm

I believe his bag is easily accessible. To rentboys.

AJWjr. October 21, 2011 at 5:49 pm

Bag, sac, same-same…

MaxNeanderthal October 21, 2011 at 3:03 pm

On a par with "Honest Doc, I slipped on the floor and there was this baseball bat standing upright alone on that same floor, and that's how it came to be inserted to the full length of my descending colon, etc. etc. "
You get the picture…….

Rotundo_ October 21, 2011 at 7:48 pm

Seinfeld already covered that material…

powersuit October 21, 2011 at 12:46 pm

Those are some super-special underpants he has on. Bet he bought them just for the occassion.

BaldarTFlagass October 21, 2011 at 3:25 pm

Wait, is he a Mormon?

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:49 pm

No, their "special underpants" go all the way up to the neck.

ProudLibunatic October 22, 2011 at 1:00 am

I love the shiny waistband. Classy touch.

ColonelDoctor October 21, 2011 at 12:46 pm

A car? That must've been SOME evening, Rent Boy.

urgje October 21, 2011 at 12:58 pm

The Rent Boy Is Too Damn High!

YasserArraFeck October 21, 2011 at 2:05 pm

Squeeze his nuts and he'll go higher

FrenchTwist40 October 24, 2011 at 12:17 am

Are you perhaps thinking of Ted Haggard's rent boy?

Fred_Wertham_Jr October 21, 2011 at 12:47 pm

Thank God for the GOP preserving our Cocktober traditions.

Sorry. Somebody was gonna do it eventually.

Or even before me. At least I apologized.

hagajim October 21, 2011 at 12:47 pm

It's a bird, it's a plane….naw, it's just another closeted gay Republican denying he likes it in the ass.

ManchuCandidate October 21, 2011 at 12:47 pm

He sort of looks like the X-ray glasses guy gone wild on the down low.

SexySmurf October 21, 2011 at 12:47 pm

With a body like that, I'm shocked he has to pay for it.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:50 pm

When you're on the down-low, looking for a little discreet bumfuckery, pay is the way to go. Of course, his bf turned out to be not-so-discreet, but he must not have paid enough.

jaytingle October 21, 2011 at 12:48 pm

“Promise Keeper” is the second thesaurus-listed antonym for “promise keeper,” referring to the Christian man-guy group.

ManchuCandidate October 21, 2011 at 12:48 pm

I thought this dude was the mayor of See Cock-ups.

prommie October 21, 2011 at 4:05 pm

A for effort, Manchu.

x111e7thst October 21, 2011 at 12:49 pm

I was hiking the Appalachian Trail and I hired him to carry my luggage.

kissawookiee October 21, 2011 at 12:49 pm

Wow. Milhouse's dad sure has hit the skids.

poncho_pilot October 21, 2011 at 1:13 pm

"take my hand with your glove of love."

HedonismBot October 21, 2011 at 1:20 pm

Can he borrow a feeling? Hurtin' hearts need some healin..

Generation[redacted] October 21, 2011 at 1:26 pm

I sleep in a race car! Do you?

LetUsBray October 21, 2011 at 3:13 pm

No, I sleep in a big bed, with my rent boy.

chascates October 21, 2011 at 12:49 pm

Obama now live announcing troop wilthdrawals from Iraq by the end of the year.
"After nearly 9 years…"

Afghanistan, not so much.

An_Outhouse October 21, 2011 at 12:57 pm

Considering that the Iraquis are basically kicking us out – yeah Hopey! Its about time.

chascates October 21, 2011 at 12:59 pm

And Bush is still unhappy the Iraqis haven't thanked him for liberating them.

Chichikovovich October 21, 2011 at 1:07 pm

They *tried* to give him a thank you present of a lovely pair of shoes.

baconzgood October 21, 2011 at 12:50 pm

AHHHHHHHHHHHH MY EYES MAKE IT GO AWAY!!!

(What kinda 40+ year old guy wears turquoise banana hammocks?)

MissTaken October 21, 2011 at 12:59 pm

You'd be amazed. I dated a guy earlier this year (46 yo) who had not only turquoise but also purple banana hammocks. He said he wore them on "special" occasions. By special he meant those few random times he would have sex with a woman.

imissopus October 21, 2011 at 1:22 pm

And you let this amazing specimen of manhood get away??!!!

MissTaken October 21, 2011 at 1:24 pm

Sadly I'm missing some bits that he actually likes to have sexy-time with, specifically a penis and testicles.

imissopus October 21, 2011 at 1:35 pm

An occupational hazard when single in San Francisco.

MaxNeanderthal October 21, 2011 at 3:07 pm

My green lycra budgie-smugglers will never feel (ooo!) the same again…

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:52 pm

"banana hammocks"? I might just be in love, baconz.

not that Dewey October 21, 2011 at 12:50 pm

California is so starved for hot celebrity action that any time the mayor of Palookaville shows up, TMZ is all over it like gravy on waffles.

poncho_pilot October 21, 2011 at 1:12 pm

which is coincidentally, an apt description of events that occurred on the night this photo was taken.

Neoyorquino October 21, 2011 at 12:52 pm

Myers said he wasn’t even sure the photos were of him and wondered if they had been altered.

“Those are definitely not my Underoos™. Mine have Spider-Man on them,” he said, declining to provide specifics.

chicken_thief October 21, 2011 at 1:25 pm

Santorum is "Spider Man"?! Christ on an ox cart, I can't keep up with these euphemisms…

Crank_Tango October 21, 2011 at 12:53 pm

Talk about documentation! And something tells me, that outie bellybutton is gonna out him in the end…

Geminisunmars October 21, 2011 at 1:30 pm

I think I need to re-take anatomy. I is confuzed.

Fare la Volpe October 21, 2011 at 1:41 pm

That ain't no belly button…

Poindexter718 October 21, 2011 at 12:53 pm

Cocktober arrived after all!!11!!

Ducksworthy October 21, 2011 at 12:54 pm

Could have been worse (e.g. Santorum stains)

Extemporanus October 21, 2011 at 12:57 pm

Look closer, on the other side of the bed up near the pillow…

CapnFatback October 21, 2011 at 12:54 pm

David Cross is a Republican mayor in New Jersey? That's perfectly understandishable.

ManchuCandidate October 21, 2011 at 1:14 pm

He wasn't going to blue himself again.

GunToting[Redacted] October 21, 2011 at 1:17 pm

"I blue myself!"

BerkeleyBear October 21, 2011 at 1:25 pm

Well, he is going for the nevernude look (thank god).

simplyblue7 October 21, 2011 at 12:55 pm

Oh God, could at least warn of us the picture in advance!?

Mumbletypeg October 21, 2011 at 12:56 pm

the top thesaurus-listed antonym for “promise keeper,”

You know what else is found next to 'Promise Keepers™' in the Dicktionary of Cult Literacy?

chascates October 21, 2011 at 1:01 pm

Tryst Keepers?

BerkeleyBear October 21, 2011 at 1:26 pm

Dick?

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 1:57 pm

Secret Creepers?

prommie October 21, 2011 at 12:57 pm

I never liked those Austin Powers movies anyway, and what he did to The Grinch was criminal.

baconzgood October 21, 2011 at 1:00 pm

I find this VERY VERY difficult to masterbate too.

jus_wonderin October 21, 2011 at 1:25 pm

Turn the picture upside down, bacon.

emmelemm October 21, 2011 at 2:26 pm

That made me laugh out loud. At work.

baconzgood October 21, 2011 at 2:39 pm

Glad to be of service.

YouBetcha October 21, 2011 at 3:04 pm

GOP foibles never make for good wank material.

SayItWithWookies October 21, 2011 at 1:01 pm

So he's saying that someone just tried to randomly blackmail him? Oh, of course — because if I was going to extort money from someone, I'd go straight to the mayor of some town in New Jersey I'd never heard of — everyone knows those local public servants are the ones making the real killing in this economy.

zappadoo76 October 21, 2011 at 2:32 pm

It was blackmail. Not "random." Not chosen in advance either. The rentboy decided to blackmail the mayor the moment he found out who he was. The mayor wouldn't give him what he asked for (BMW, recording equipment), so now the rentboy is outing him. That is as obvious to me as the nose on my face, which I can actually see if I look into the corner of my eye.

SayItWithWookies October 21, 2011 at 3:40 pm

Come on, who are you going to believe — the honest, hardworking family-values Republican politician, or some sleazy Californian who just happens to have tons of naked pictures of him?

snackypants October 21, 2011 at 1:03 pm

Pictures like these make me happy that Mr. Snackypants is a boxer shorts man.

fuflans October 21, 2011 at 1:14 pm

and me that mr fuflans is likewise minded.

Geminisunmars October 21, 2011 at 1:33 pm

Pix or GTFO

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:56 pm

Yeah, let's see ALL those banana hammocks!

OneYieldRegular October 21, 2011 at 1:05 pm

Justifying Craziness Option #47: Maybe he was just re-enacting that Seinfeld episode where George gets some boudoir photos taken?

x111e7thst October 21, 2011 at 1:06 pm

OT I am pleased to see that now that all the teabaggers have gone galt and stopped hiring the unemployment rates have begun to inch (slowly, painfully) downward. http://news.yahoo.com/unemployment-rates-fall-hal

Chichikovovich October 21, 2011 at 1:08 pm

That means the non-moronic business owners see an opening and they're making their move. Darwin+Capitalism WIN!

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 8:56 pm

We should prod them into renewing that statement periodically, so the unemployment rates keep going down, heh heh.

thefrontpage October 21, 2011 at 1:09 pm

Recent ad in The Village Voice Personals:

Medford, N.J. Hot mid-aged politico playah type lookin' fer good times with crazy rentboy types. Middle-aged, paunchy, very white, glasses, chubby, pale, balding, overweight, not exactly GQ model Adonis Hercules type!! Looking to meet and discuss politics, hotel rooms, underwear, flash photography, ethics, the art of denial, delusions, severe delusions, slight craziness, possible conflicting homosexual tendencies, desires and urges, homosexuality and the Republican politician, homosexuality and hypocrisy, prostitution, photoshopping, computers, online ads and the socio-political ramifications of stated conservative Republican politicians railing against homosexuality while actually engaging in homosexual behavior at the same time. Should be fun! Contact Chris Myers, Medford.

baconzgood October 21, 2011 at 1:25 pm

Well played. (Baconz tips his cap)

Sharkey October 21, 2011 at 1:31 pm

You forgot terrorism, and the best way to buy a car.

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

That's not a "date", that's the Republican Convention!

bureaucrap October 21, 2011 at 1:09 pm

"Probably it was the terrorists with their Photoshop."

Yes, because the Mayor of Medford Twp, NJ (pop. 22, 253) has always been perceived by the Taliban as a threat to Afgani tribal sovereignty.

edgydrifter October 21, 2011 at 1:09 pm

Being a Republican means never having to justify craziness.

Geminisunmars October 21, 2011 at 1:35 pm

Why isn't he in the debates??

MissTaken October 21, 2011 at 1:09 pm

Myers is just demonstrating how right Mitsch was when saying that ladies need to be whore in the bedroom – complete with tight panties and high thread count sheets.

Rotundo_ October 21, 2011 at 7:53 pm

For the win! Best Jersey tie-in and comment!

Antispandex October 21, 2011 at 1:10 pm

When Anthony Weiner tried this excuse, the media went crazy. But, then again he was a Democrat cruising for some strange and not a Family Values Party guy. Besides, the approved Fox News version of escaping this type of charge is, 1.) He was set up. 2.) I won't dignify that with a response / we've talked this to death and I have nothing more to add, or 3.) Everyone does it, what's the big deal? All may need to be used here…before he resigns.

BerkeleyBear October 21, 2011 at 1:27 pm

Weiner, though, didn't even get any. I'm guessing rentboy put out.

jus_wonderin October 21, 2011 at 1:42 pm

That's why Mr. Mayor is sleeping. Ten minutes of Rentboy and then a nap.

UW8316154 October 21, 2011 at 8:20 pm

Only ten minutes seems like a waste of a perfectly good rentboy!

FrenchTwist40 October 24, 2011 at 12:29 am

Depends on his rate, I suppose. I can't imagine that the Mayor of Medford, NJ gets paid enough to order rentboys by the week and get the bulk discount.

zappadoo76 October 21, 2011 at 2:35 pm

Ant'ny was on the teevee a lot, too. Getting interviewed in front of faux Greek pillars and stuff in the Capitol. The mayor is just some guy.

JumpySnark October 24, 2011 at 9:36 pm

Or is he just some gay?

Biel_ze_Bubba October 21, 2011 at 3:35 pm

Don't forget 4.) "My Democrat opponents are just trying to distract the public from the real issues."

Buckminster October 21, 2011 at 1:10 pm

Eeeeeew! Where's the Johnson & Johnson Eyeball bleach?

Biel_ze_Bubba October 21, 2011 at 3:32 pm

Out of stock. You can use J&J Children's Eyeball Bleach, if you double the dose.

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 9:57 pm

Nope.
Bleach ain't gonna do it, you guys.
*passes sporks to Buckminster and Biel*

meatlofer October 21, 2011 at 1:10 pm

Or worse than Chris Christie….Snookie.

Pres.Libunatic October 21, 2011 at 1:12 pm

THIS LOOKS SHOPPED. I can tell from some of the pixels and from seeing quite a few shops in my time.
http://www.google.com/search?q=this+looks+shopped

GregComlish October 21, 2011 at 1:13 pm

Move over Scott Brown!

Indiepalin October 21, 2011 at 1:13 pm

Headline of the day (Foxnews):

"Michele Bachmann's Entire Paid Staff in New Hampshire Reportedly Has Quit "

"If we go much longer without seeing her, she's going to turn up on milk cartons"

Batshit Begins

bureaucrap October 21, 2011 at 1:13 pm

"The [rentboy] said Myers identified himself as a mayor from New Jersey and offered his township identification card and gold ID shield as proof during the early-morning meeting "

What I really love about these GOP closet cases is that they seem to be compelled to identify themselves as "VIPs" even in situations where common sense would counsel a modicum of discretion. Perhaps they think they will get free/discounted services from rentboys just by flashing their business card. Which makes me think that a rentboy who advertises "Free BJs for All GOP elected officials" could make A LOT of money.

Generation[redacted] October 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

Obviously he got Larry Flynt's groupon special.

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 11:59 am

The rentboys could actually *give* free BJs and *still* make a lot of money, by blackmailing the dumb bastards.

fuflans October 21, 2011 at 1:13 pm

today we are all california rent boys denied an automobile.

writechic October 21, 2011 at 1:54 pm

That'll teach Mr. Mayor from making promises he doesn't intend to keep. But someone should tell RentBoy that's total SOP for bad boyfriends.

UW8316154 October 21, 2011 at 8:22 pm

Don't I know it, boy…don't I know.

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 2:21 pm

Truly, that is how the 1% views the 99.

El Pinche October 21, 2011 at 1:14 pm

Ladies and gentlemen, COCKTOBER has arrived.

Mahousu October 21, 2011 at 1:15 pm

“I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said
… referring to the pictures of his penis he had posted on Craigslist.

littlebigdaddy October 21, 2011 at 1:16 pm

“I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said, declining to provide specifics."

Yeah, haven't we all?

fuflans October 21, 2011 at 1:17 pm

actually no, no i haven't.

Sharkey October 21, 2011 at 1:40 pm

I'm kind of glad he didn't provide specifics.

BornInATrailer October 21, 2011 at 1:16 pm

Is that the bald, gay friend of Carrie's from Sex and the City? And why does that question pop into my brain? Damn that wife of mine.

fuflans October 21, 2011 at 1:19 pm

We're a happy family
We're a happy family
We're a happy family
Me mom and daddy

Siting here in Queens
Eating refried beans
We're in all the magazines
Gulpin' down thorazines

We ain't got no friends
Our troubles never end
No Christmas cards to send
Daddy likes men.

today, in punk lyrics.

poncho_pilot October 21, 2011 at 1:27 pm

thanks. now i wanna sniff some glue.

seppdecker October 21, 2011 at 1:22 pm

“I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said.

Republicans may not create any jobs, but they make a fuckton of comedy.

user-of-owls October 21, 2011 at 1:22 pm

Wow, I never would have guessed that Sgt. Bilko was a secret fairy boy.

proudgrampa October 21, 2011 at 1:22 pm

Jesus. Dat UGLY.

Guppy06 October 21, 2011 at 1:24 pm

But was he a gentleman in the living room?

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 2:07 pm

hahaha

Beowoof October 21, 2011 at 1:25 pm

From reading the article I would say the mayor is taking a wide stance to avoid stepping in his own bullshit. "It's not working mayor you can't get your legs that far apart.

MissTaken October 21, 2011 at 1:28 pm

I don't know, he's got them spread pretty wide in that pic

MissTaken October 21, 2011 at 1:26 pm

See closeted GOP politicians, this is why you have to pay, play, and get the f out the way

Terry October 21, 2011 at 1:29 pm

"“I’ve been down that road before, where a photo has been photoshopped to look like something it wasn’t,” he said, declining to provide specifics."

Yes, there is a seeeekrit plot against the mayor of Medford, NJ. Daniel Craig will play Myers in the movie version.

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 12:01 pm

Daniel Craig??? In his DREAMS!! Myers would be doing good to get Paul Giacometti [sp?].

chicken_thief October 21, 2011 at 1:29 pm

Marcus' prayers have been answered – a new client!!!

Fare la Volpe October 21, 2011 at 1:30 pm

My tummy feels urpy now.

Thanks, Wonkette.

user-of-owls October 21, 2011 at 1:34 pm

[In a Public Relations class on 'Damage Control' ten years from now]

"And so we see that in retrospect, Chris Myers' decision to release copies of his passport to the press in order to refute claims that he was in California at the time proved to be ill-advised. A skilled PR agent would have alerted Myers that the nearly two dozen stamps indicating trips to Thailand might prove detrimental to the mayor's public image."

Crank_Tango October 21, 2011 at 1:34 pm

also, who the fuck has 23 grand in a savings account?

Blueb4sunrise October 21, 2011 at 1:40 pm

What's a savings account?

Dok-cupy Everything October 21, 2011 at 2:27 pm

What's a "grand"?

finallyhappy October 21, 2011 at 3:20 pm

23 grand whats? I don't think of my $5 bills as grand but hey,whatever

GregComlish October 21, 2011 at 4:58 pm

Ummm… I do.

Not really sure where else I should put it. Gold is in a bubble. Asian market is in a bubble. Europe is fucked. Possibly looking at a double dip recession that could hit domestic stocks hard. Never really been a bond man myself. I'd consider real estate, but I'm too worried about job security to settle down.

Guess I could just buy more energy futures but, I do like to keep some liquidity and not get excessive commodity exposure, which also could fluctuate during a double dip.

102415 October 24, 2011 at 12:55 am

I feel the same. I can't put it under the bed. I have a lot of dividend stocks already. If everything crashes it crashes we will all be fucked. I suppose I should stock up on hobo beans. Wait, maybe I should sell hobo beans. Didn't James Dean do pretty well selling beans in "East of Eden"?

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 12:02 pm

I used to, once upon a time when I was still middle class and there still *was* a middle class.

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 1:39 pm

“Few things are impossible, but it is very difficult to identify the ultimate source,” [His lawyer] said. “If I could, I would sue him or her, but he or she can hide behind the anonymity of the Internet. I would be suing a ghost.”

What kind of fool doesn't know that is a complete lie?

prommie October 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

"I'm utterly helpless here."

MozakiBlocks October 21, 2011 at 1:41 pm

There is NOTHING sexy about this picture!!!

prommie October 21, 2011 at 1:41 pm

He was a "missile expert" in the Navy. Whoo-hoooo! Worked for a missile defense contractor; he must have been the man behind the famous "heat seeking moisture missile."

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Well, you know Cainhorn Leghorn worked Ballistics for the Navy. Maybe they were able-bodied seamen together.

Jukesgrrl October 21, 2011 at 7:06 pm

I used to work for some engineers who (seriously) referred to themselves as "erection specialists."

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

"Hello Mayor, this is Marcus Bachmann. While you are a bit older than my typical client, there is an experimental treatment we can try with a transfusion from a young ex-Gay…"

Chet Kincaid October 21, 2011 at 1:51 pm

"Why Do All These Art Directors Keep Photoshopping My Cock" is an Onion classic.

ibwilliamsi October 21, 2011 at 2:03 pm

Do I see a little Santorum on the sheets there?

prommie October 21, 2011 at 2:04 pm

Its obvious now, isn't it, that he has a secret, evil, gay twin? Surely thats the most logical explanation, his secret, evil, gay twin periodically drugs him and then runs rampant in the world, impersonating him, and doing all kinds of homo and gay stuff everywhere, with rentboys and everything, and then the secret evil gay twin disappears, and poor Chris wakes up and has to deal with the aftermath. Secret evil gay twin is probably in cahoots with the rentboy, trying to extort a nice Mazda3 or a low mileage Chrysler Neon out of him. Who among us hasn't been down that road, in truth?

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:46 pm

I have a secret evil twin who spends all my money and messes up my house, so I can really sympathize.

owhatever October 21, 2011 at 2:05 pm

Operation Mayor was a clean success, Chief. We drugged his room-service hamburger, then the whole team made an entry. We copied all of his documents on our XE36-1 secreted decoder rings and arranged him in various positions for incriminating photographs. Then we pulled out. He never knew what happened. We own him now and therefore, we own Medford.

DaSandman October 21, 2011 at 2:07 pm

Welcome to Medford!

SaintRond October 21, 2011 at 2:19 pm

Thinking about Republican men having gay sex is a threat to my lunch.

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 12:04 pm

Thinking about Republican men having sex…
Thinking about Republican men…
Thinking about Republicans…

Callyson October 21, 2011 at 2:22 pm

Editor’s note: The newspaper has a responsibility and duty to inform you about significant issues involving our public officials. That is why we are publishing this story.
Oh, come on, PhillyBurbs…at least admit that you found this salacious story too good to pass up…

Dok-cupy Everything October 21, 2011 at 2:24 pm

So THAT'S what happened to Dr. Tobias Fünke. I see he's lost the mustache, but he's still a never-nude.

vacuumslayer October 21, 2011 at 2:31 pm

You keep saying this word "sexy." I do not think it means what you think it means.

Jukesgrrl October 21, 2011 at 7:09 pm

The same people refer to Republican Party rubber chicken banquets as "galas."

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 9:10 pm

I don't know where you read about the rubber chicken, but that's not what's served at Republican fuckfests. IIRC, the last teabagger party they threw themselves (back when they still had money) featured steak and lobster, which apparently really pissed off the hoveround-riding rank and file Poorz they somehow suckered into joining their "party."

Good times, good times!

luke_warm October 21, 2011 at 2:36 pm

I find it enjoyable when self-hating hypocrites who've been in favor of a whole anti-gay bigoted agenda get outed, but this guy seems to have positioned himself as a moderate republican who was against don't ask, don't tell, so I'm wondering what the uproar is about here. Is it just that he's gay?

Jukesgrrl October 21, 2011 at 7:19 pm

I have no problem with him being gay. I care about his carelessness in embarrassing his wife and kids if they didn't know about his extracurricular activities, especially if they were used as props to advance whatever political career one has being mayor of a New Jersey hamlet. But you have a valid point. Innocent until proven guilty. Maybe the kids knew about Dad romping with rent boys in his Underoos.

Callyson October 21, 2011 at 2:38 pm

Oh, and the piece de resistance, from the rentboy's website: Mr Mayor likes red flavored lube (scroll to the bottom of the webpage for that gem)…

prommie October 21, 2011 at 2:44 pm

Flavored? For the felching?

user-of-owls October 21, 2011 at 3:39 pm

Red-flavored is what the 'marinara' sauce in the school cafeteria was. It was awful, but not nearly as bad as the gray-flavored 'meat.'

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:48 pm

They have (or used to have) something in the midwest called "red pop" (i.e., soda). You know it's bad when they're not even pretending to have a flavor instead of a color. It's like saying "chocolate colored milkshake".

user-of-owls October 22, 2011 at 9:01 pm

aka, 'brown milk.'

The Peruvians have taken the 'red pop' in a rather unsettling direction with Inca Kola, whose palish yellow hue is reminiscent…oh, just look at it.

Negropolis October 23, 2011 at 12:22 am

Faygo Libel! This Michigander demands a retraction of that statement, post haste.

proudgrampa October 21, 2011 at 3:38 pm

Whatinhell does "red" taste like???

Christ, do I even want to know???

HolyCow!! October 21, 2011 at 2:40 pm

I couldn't tell you how many times that has happened to me. There are some real perverts out there! And they all have cameras too. Damn bitchez.

EatsBabyDingos October 21, 2011 at 2:46 pm

My weiner has shrivelled so far up that it came out my ear inside out. Thanks, Chris.

GFPcat October 21, 2011 at 2:50 pm

Looks like someone was taking Phil Mitsch's advice about being the whore in the bedroom.

twoeightnine October 21, 2011 at 3:00 pm

I see he's an innie and not an outie.

proudgrampa October 21, 2011 at 3:39 pm

An outie would have really freaked me out!

YouBetcha October 21, 2011 at 3:02 pm

I have done some obscene, terryfing things, and no one has ever offered me a car.

Stupid gay GOP. Aren't there any straight ones? My lame hippie hybrid vehicle is beginning to make funny noises.

FlexPerks October 21, 2011 at 3:05 pm

Oh interesting! I just stumbled upon an June 2010 US News and World Report which mentioned Christie and Nikki Haley as possible 2012 preznit candidates. We laugh but watch the heck out for Haley, she's bad news in a teabag and she'll be comin' at ya.

Jukesgrrl October 21, 2011 at 7:26 pm

I've been saying she's Vice Presidential gold if Romney is nominated. He will have to get a certified bagger who will appear to diversify the ticket. Surely he's not going for Bachmann or Palin, Rubio says he's out, and America's already seen too much of Piyush Jindal. When they find the body of that guy who says she did him in a car, you'll know it's goin' down.

EBGrey October 21, 2011 at 3:05 pm

NJ GOPer, Phil Mitsch, said that a woman should strive to be "a lady in the living room and a whore in the bedroom." The good mayor was merely pointing out that the addage goes both ways…ahem.

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 12:08 pm

As does the mayor, apparently.

Biel_ze_Bubba October 21, 2011 at 3:29 pm

"I’m not going to justify craziness,” he said.

Talk about a RINO!

mrblifil October 21, 2011 at 3:42 pm

I always miss out on the best threads.

ProudLibunatic October 21, 2011 at 4:45 pm

Some rehab in 3…2…1…

emmelemm October 21, 2011 at 5:07 pm

There's a clinic in Minnesota that would just love to have him!

JackObin October 21, 2011 at 5:37 pm

Mmmmmm. Sexy undies and eye glasses. Little Georgie Will must be in his glory, with the World Series and all, I mean.

DrunkIrishman October 21, 2011 at 6:00 pm

Is he wearing Wonder Woman's bottoms?!?

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:51 pm

I think he *is* Wonder Woman's bottom.

franco_pinyon October 21, 2011 at 6:31 pm

TOTALLY asleep! Not posing AT ALL. Nope. uh-uh.

Jukesgrrl October 21, 2011 at 7:27 pm

Hey, people, he took his socks off. What more do you want?!?

marinmaven October 21, 2011 at 7:38 pm

I am thinking of quote I saw here once about mini-Hillary Clinton, "What has been seen, can't be unseen." How can I unsee this? Is there a series of keys i can press?

Why don't you be good, and put a picture of our president in a bathing suit looking cool and cut in Hawaii. You know the one I am talking about. Mommy is going to get a cocktail now.

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 12:10 pm

"Why don't you be good, and put a picture of our president in a bathing suit looking cool and cut in Hawaiii"

*retreats upstairs with Cocktober issue of "Brainy Guys"*

GorzoTheMighty October 21, 2011 at 7:46 pm

This and Phil Mitsch in one day?. I can't take anymore (sound of gunshot and something hitting the floor)

UW8316154 October 21, 2011 at 8:19 pm

I went to investigate the rentboy's evidence, to see for myself, as it were, and am deeply saddened that the website is no longer available. maybe he got that Probe he wanted, after all.

Pristine_ODummy October 21, 2011 at 9:08 pm

Secret evil GAY twin = no goatee.

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 9:55 pm

So, apparently this guy's wife isn't a lady in the parlor and a whore in the bedroom?

lulzmonger October 21, 2011 at 10:01 pm

*urge to puke rising*
Mayor Pr0n?
DO NOT WANT EVAR.

tessiee October 21, 2011 at 10:11 pm

Yeah, that'll teach him to leave the craigslist personals the hell alone.

ibwilliamsi October 21, 2011 at 10:23 pm

"He's been down this road before"? OMG – you fucking people!

ttommyunger October 21, 2011 at 11:14 pm

Thoughtful of him not to get shots of the flip-side. Skidmarks would still show up on that baby blue and you know there are skidmarks on this boy's skivvies.

Troglodeity October 21, 2011 at 11:51 pm

Thurston Howell III relaxes after a glorious tryst with the Skipper.

voodooeconomics October 22, 2011 at 10:21 am

The gentleman in the picture has a lower back problem. The positioning of his right leg, just so, indicates that some of the spinal cartilage in the lower back needs adjustments. The blue garment helps with relaxation and the glasses afford a complete situation awareness, if he must be awaken by a sudden poke.

a_pink_poodle October 22, 2011 at 1:36 pm

Jee wizz what a shocker. A GOP politician caught getting gay with a male prostitute YAWN

Do you think there'll ever be a GOP politician caught getting straight with a female prostitute one of these days?

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 12:10 pm

::fap::?

HistoriCat October 24, 2011 at 12:44 am

That image is very disturbing. I wish you’d have chosen something else. I realize that it’s a shameful part of American history that we should never forget, but it’s too much.

(Sheesh – two days and no one posted this? Slackers.)

Ardiva40 October 24, 2011 at 8:28 pm

Yes, God fearing, family values Repubs. Gotta love 'em for setting themselves up.

JumpySnark October 24, 2011 at 9:35 pm

Well, those may be "his magical Superman-sized briefs," but it would appear that SOMETHING is not exactly Superman-sized (if you know what I mean, and I think you do)!

stribs November 15, 2011 at 9:05 pm

At first I thought that was George Costanza in a famous scene from Seinfeld. But, no,it's just another anti-gay GOP elected official busted in a rent boy scandal. Anyone keeping a list of all these guys? Must be getting pretty long.

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 11:48 am

Oh! What *month*!
That would be Dickcember.

tessiee October 23, 2011 at 12:07 pm

Sorry, my friend, but no retractions are in order. Having lived in Ann Arbor for two years, I'm a former Michigander (or, as I like to call it, Mishugenah) myself, and I can state without fear of contradiction that Faygo absolutely did make something called "Red Pop", and it was on the shelves of every supermarket.

PristinePantalones October 23, 2011 at 8:29 pm

Dare I request the full calendar?

I dare, I dare!

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