People have been speaking to your editor about the prophetic words of the Reverend Mojo Nixon, particularly this song — recorded live with Skid Roper in a St. Louis club back when Ronald Reagan was still technically alive. So here it is, Ocupados, “I Hate Banks,” the legendary Wobblies campfire anthem from the 1980s.
And here is Mojo Nixon’s platform, as heard on the radio by some guy videotaping the road:
Join a Credit Union today, or just keep your money in a mason jar. (It will take about three hours of Awfulness to change over all your bill pay/debit card online stuff, which is intentional, but then you’re done giving money to the banks. Ask your new credit union if they’ll HELP switch over all your old nonsense. Sometimes they will do this. Hooray for Freedoms!
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The Best Way To Rob A Bank Is To Own One…
YES. Heard that for the first time on Democracy Now this morning. I like his coined term "white collar criminologists" too, though I didn't get to finish listening to what exactly's meant by that~
Mojo hails from Charlotte NC, home of Bank of US America. And also site of the 2012 DNC. And the NasCar Hall of Dipshits. I SEE A CONSPIRACY!. Obviously we should expect a 2nd Nixon administration in 2012. I for one welcome our new punk rock overlord.
Kewl! Mojo Nixon is old school greatl reference. Perfect accompaniment for closing my BOFA account and opening with USAA.
closing my BOFA account and opening with USAA
Thumbs-splitting fists of good cheer, here here~
Mojo is a mushroom maniac who is well-known for moaning with yer mama…
I can't say enough good things about banking with USAA.
I think the worst they've done to me is taken away their ~2% cash back program on their debit cards. They still reimburse other banks' ATM fees every month
Is true – USAA is great, you will love them.
USAA – best customer service ever!
You will be very happy with USAA. I think one of the reasons my husband married me was so he could become a member after hearing me gush about them.
If you ain't got Mojo Nixon then your bank could use some fixin'…..
Then we started screamin' California Dreamin'
on such a winter's day
We got into a car; away we started rollin'
said "how much did you pay for this?" said "Nothin', man; it's stolen!"
We'll eat fudge banana swirl
and dress like Minnie Pearl
I wish I could offer more than a single upfist for this.
Ah, Mojo. May Debbie Gibson always be pregnant with your two-headed love child.
Yeah, I always thought those two were a pretty cute couple.
Each month you watch that video, a $5.00 service charge will be added to your respective checking account.
Ken it must be 6 a.m. your circadian-derailed time. Thanks for giving us mo' Mojo and less Mourning for breakfast.
We truly needz moar Slide Whistle in the moaning….
I switched from my evil godawful bank to a credit union last year, dammit. Maybe as a gesture of solidarity I'll take my money out and open a new account at a bank and then close it. Yeah!
If you want to further stick it to The Man, avoid using any piece of plastic with the Visa or MasterCard logos on it. This is all about the swipe fees charged by them, so don't swipe to begin with.
I joined a credit union years ago because several of the large banks had pissed me off. Today they are everywhere and the 3 that I have been a member of have been great. Screw the man and I mean that in the bad way.
Nearly got into a bar brawl once with a banker when he found out I worked for a tech company (run by greedy idiots) who lost him a lot of money. He went on about greed and that is when I told him (paraphrased) "Holy fuck man, you work for a bank. Right now you're like a hooker who's arguing with another hooker about about who was the better virgin." The laughter of the bar shut him up.
Although I'm kind of curious if liberatarian Mojo is a Paultard.
Mojo's not racist enough.
Do you think Mojo hates John McCain too?
Doesn't everyone?
I can totally picture Elizabeth Warren on washboard in the 21st century version of "I hate banks(ters)".
It's true that they don't make banks like Ernie anymore.
Nor Gordon.
And, of course, I could repost Mr. Woody Guthrie's comparison / contrast essay on the methods of Pretty Boy Floyd and other gangsters:
Yes, as through this world I've wandered
I've seen lots of funny men;
Some will rob you with a six-gun,
And some with a fountain pen.
And as through your life you travel,
Yes, as through your life you roam,
You won't never see an outlaw
Drive a family from their home.
I had my money in a mason jar but Regions hit me with a $7 a month 'silica savings service charge' so now I got nuthin but free BBW porn on the intertube…
Fucking Regions didn't give me anything that cool.
I'm pretty sure there's no Mojo Nixon on Mitt Romney's Zune.
There is plenty of Nixon Mojo in him, though.
Nixon is Everywhere!
And oddly, Michael J. Fox.
All Tabernacle Choir and Kenny G. But since nobody knows how a Zune works, it sits in there unplayed.
Banks are people, my friend.
Evul people, but people none the less.
"Wall Street can eat my…feet!!1!?!!!"
Meat?
But what about his other great anthem, "Legalize It?" Or "I Ain't Gonna Piss In No Jar?" Mojo's current Sirius XM political talk show is called "Lying Cocksuckers."
Mojo also put out a fun album of protest songs with Jello Biafra called A Prairie Home Invasion.
I used to listen to Mojo's radio show every weekend out of Cincinnati's AM 700 WLW. Not sure if he's still on the air there, but I hope so.
Smithers, have Jello Biafra killed.
But sir, that wasn't…
Do as I say!
At least his name wasn't Pudding…..
a mason jar? don't you people know anything about finances!? keep it under your mattress. your rate of return is much higher there.
No, no, no.
Invest in Billy Beer, it always goes up, like real estate….
But the lumpy stack of pennies gives me a headache….
Sure, keep bragging that you have money to put under your mattress, you pretentious asshole.
♫♪ I don't care if it rains or freezes
'Long as I got my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car…♫♪
What? Isn't this the auditions for "X Factor"?
<snark off>
Not all credit unions are peachy-keen. I've had a checking account with one for years. Took out a home equity loan during the boom. They're being absolute dicks about trying to refinance it now.
<resume snark>
Haven't had a bank for anything since the 80s… Credit Unions rock.
May the karma of WaMu descend upon the bankers heads. Wah…mooo.
I will exercise some restraint, and refrain from simply listing every single Mojo Nixon song, but I must propose one more, just one more, which could serve as an informal Wonkette anthem of its own: Gin Guzzlin' Frenzy http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74exkmSPJuo
TSOL ca. '80:
Wake up to the same old shit
Live your life to suit their fit
Some people they don't like your hair
Policemen they just don't care
Snipers that want to be
Rifle sites are aimed at me
Wake up silent majority
The government they don't want us here
You folks can't feel that fear
You can walk the streets today
You can walk in your own way
People think that I'm crazy
These people just can't see
Wake up silent majority
Live your life
Day by day
Doing everything
That they say
Silent majority
Promote freedom
Let it be heard
Don't forget that its only a word
Silent Majority
When you gunna wake up?
And of course, Mojo Nixon was into rickrolling when rickrolling wasn't cool.
Aaah, they don't make 'em like they used to!
Rickrolling was cool?
Beautiful. The world was brighter then, when I still had hope.
Stark raving naked in the fornication nation. Poetry.
Mojo does have a good point.
Sperm banks are good, especially if they have a night deposit slot….
Don't ever want to see Nixon's Mojo; not alive, not dead.
I've always been partial to Mojo's 'Where the Hell's My Money'. Saw them with my sweetie a million years ago–one of the most enjoyable shows ever. Ahh good times. Thanks Wonkette.
So, my Megabank (Suntrust) announced it would start charging for my geezer-rate checking account for the first time ever. I went to my Branch to close it and they did some massaging, changed the name of my account and promised not to ever charge me for checking or checks. I'm still with them. I am such a fucking loser. I hate myself.
No. You are a Warrior God. You made them change it. Next time you go in there make them give you an ipod, a balloon, a coffee maker and 8% interest on your Ocu-pie Club account.
Kind words for an old fart just too fucking lazy to redo his online bill-paying accounts, but thanks.
I bought Mojo a beer one time, in the Fast Lane, probably around 1989 or so. The Dead Milkmen opened for him, to name-drop another band that is quoted here frequently. Or he went first, I don't remember.
"…back when Ronald Reagan was still technically alive."
I wasn't there, but I heard the 60s were great.
They were, with some notable exceptions, such as reagan being technically alive and governor of California.
♫
And the people's revolution is in Joan Rivers
but it's trying to get out, man!
It's trying to get out!
Listen up Joanie Baby!
♪
Where the hell's my money? http://youtu.be/GIo7eTS-2PI
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