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The Pope of flawed values.Tom Leppert is running for Senate in Texas. Who is Tom Leppert? He is a strange tool who wants to collect email addresses for his Senate campaign fundraising spam lists by starting a delusional petition site to “End the Occupation” because, he says, “the Occupy Wall Street crowd represents the same flawed values that got our country into this economic mess.” Hm. What else do we know about Tom Leppert? Tom Leppert believes no one has ever heard of “Google search,” because he was also the chairman of Washington Mutual’s audit committee right before the bank torched $63 billion of its investors’ money and became the most failed bank in American history. Tom Leppert, in other words, basically INVENTED “flawed values,” so, uh, he would know? 

Here’s the entire text of his incredibly lazy web site attempt to trick idiots into giving him their email addresses:

The Occupy Wall Street crowd represents the same flawed values that got our country into this economic mess. They possess a false sense of entitlement and think they should be receiving government handouts and run up the debt on an imaginary credit card by making hard-working Americans and future generations pay for the bill.

Please help us reach our goal of 5,000 petition signatures by October 31! We will be sending the petition to President Obama, calling on him to denounce the angry Occupy mob.

And now TOM LEPPERT, ladies and gentlemen, from RawStory:

Before it went down, WaMu was cited as one of the worst offenders in offering the junk loans that inflated the housing bubble. When that bubble popped, WaMu was seized by government regulators, then sold to JPMorgan Chase for $1.9 billion. Chase shortly thereafter received a $25 billion bailout financed by U.S. taxpayers, which it has since paid back.

Luckily for Leppert, he didn’t have to manage that morass, finding himself in a new job just before the crisis hit: Mayor of Dallas, an office he held from 2007-2011.

As a candidate for U.S. Senate, some of Leppert’s largest campaign contributors are in the finance, insurance and real estate sectors. They include the financial services and advisory firm Ernst & Young, which was sued in 2010, and again in 2011, for allegedly helping Lehman Bros. cover up its failing finances ahead of their complete collapse, which was one of main triggers that launched the global financial crisis. Ernest & Young gave Leppert $23,000, according to OpenSecrets.org.

Oh, someone go OCCUPYTOMLEPPERT or something, he seems very annoying. [RawStory]

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  • nounverb911

    I hear Bernie Madoff is looking for a new roommate.

  • finallyhappy

    Being a criminal will only help him in Texas.

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      Being a white criminal will only help him in Texas.

      Fixed

      • Guppy06

        White, black… they only execute the innocent in Texas.

      • fuflans

        Cameron Todd Willingham might think differently.

    • chicken_thief

      And his vacation property is on purty little patch a'ground called: FuckingCoonBurntBodies Mound in honor of the dark rock formations scattered around the property. Realizing, of course, that some overly sensitive people may be offended by the name, Tom's parents long long ago – possibly hours ago, drew a single line through the text.

  • The flawed value is that the natural progression for a failed banker is to run for elected office.

    So who has the entitlement issues?

    • chicken_thief

      Failed banker = sweet golden parachute

      What else does he have to do with his time now except help his friends?

      • MaxNeanderthal

        UK rhyming slang that EVERYone knows when used in conversation, e.g he's a (pause) merchant banker (pause) = he's a fucking wanker…

    • GOPCrusher

      Bankers and CEO's. How do these people continue to get jobs, when the majority of them have failure written all over their resumes?

      • OhNoGuy

        You never heard of "Fuck up and move up"? I'm sure you have.

  • nounverb911

    Another good reason to build a 100 foot tall fence all the way around Texas.

    • Callyson

      Don't forget the electrification.
      Though we should really set up an underground railroad so that decent people can escape…

      • Mahousu

        Doesn't have to be underground – make it coach class only, and the Lepperts of the world would never deign to board it.

        • Sparky_McGruff

          That might not be quite enough: we'd have to put a big Telemundo ad on the side.

      • DaRooster

        I could go for some grilled Tex-Mex…

      • OneDollarJuana

        I'm having a bit of trouble about the signage declaring death to climbers. Cain says he'll put the US/Mexico fence signs in English and Spanish, but any signage we put on the US/Texas fence necessarily assumes that Texans are literate.

        • Sparky_McGruff

          "any signage we put on the US/Texas fence necessarily assumes that Texans are literate"

          I'm not sure I see the problem here.

  • littlebigdaddy

    Well, it is very broad-minded of Texans to allow lepperts to hold public office. I'll bet Kazakhstan doesn't.

    • subsum

      Nor Jews. Ask Borat.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      The Kazakhs do have their standards.

    • GOPCrusher

      Don't they have a leppertsarium in Louisiana?

    • Swampgas_Man

      A Leppert cannot change its spots, however.

      • OhNoGuy

        However, if patient, they sometimes slide off on their own. With a soft "plop" on the floor or in the dirt.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    Ex-WaMu Banker Somehow Manages To Call Ocupados ‘Entitled’

    As far as I'm concerned, they're entitled to punch him in the throat.

    • FNMA

      I was thinking a bit lower than throat.

      • poncho_pilot

        right at the base of the throat. yep. in the balls.

        • tessiee

          "right at the base of the throat. yep. in the balls."

          What th–??
          The balls aren't at the base of your throat, except when you're giving a blow…

          Oh, I see what you did there!

  • Needz more beatings with dildos.

    • littlebigdaddy

      Sounds like a night at Lindsey's!

      • chicken_thief

        Marcus has booked a flight to help lead "the prayers".

      • OneDollarJuana

        That's Miss Lindsey to you, suh!

  • justkillmenow

    The OWS "crowd" is entitled…entitled to protest, entitled to speak their minds, and if he's not careful, entitled to kick his ass.

    • snackypants

      I love my First Amendment entitlements.

      • WunkRocker

        Hey it'd be a SHAME if some lesser entitled script kids got into his campaign whore chest. You know those kids without names. What are they called?

  • OC_Surf_Serf

    Let's see: Somehow entitled to huge tax cuts, entitled to buying political favours, entitled to owning the media, and now think they are entitled to blame this rotting economy on folks who "possess a false sense of entitlement…."

    Holy shit, Dr. Freud.

    • Toomush_Infer

      No, see – he's right here – by being unentitled to all these things, Occupados MUST have a false sense of entitlement. It's lawyer logic….

  • freakishlywrong

    We have bigger bubbles to pop. Big asshole wingnut size bubbles..

  • Not_So_Much

    Something tells me he hasn't read the OWS manifesto any more carefully than his own WaMu balance sheets. Go eat a bag of dicks Tom.

    • chicken_thief

      "Go eat a bag of dicks …"

      I like that!

      • WunkRocker

        A big bag of messican dicks con mole!

  • Goonemeritus

    I do feel a sense of entitlement. I feel entitled to see criminal actors in our financial industry go to jail.

    • comrad_darkness

      Many virtual upfists after the real one.

  • EatsBabyDingos

    He puts the "tit" in entitled.

    • baconzgood

      Tee-Hee

      "Teat"

    • DaRooster

      … and the "led" too… also.

    • tessiee

      "He puts the "tit" in entitled."

      ??
      I thought that was limeylizzie.

  • memzilla

    I have never seen a man who has a more urgent need of being repeatedly bitchslapped across the face with a Texas-sized "We Are The 99%" placard.

  • NotYerGaryBusey

    Good Ol' Mayor Park Cities. He also stands firmly behind building a 1.5 Billion dollar highway down the middle of a river bed that floods twice a year. That's my Dallas!

    • comrad_darkness

      So, you don't drive on it twice a year. Problem solved.

      Let me guess, that 1.5 billion is *Federal* money, right?

      • NotYerGaryBusey

        Actually even better! Municipal bond money administered by a Tollway Authority that is beholden to none.

        Fortunately the Corps of Engineers is slowly backing towards the door while covering its backside with a three-ring binder full of failed levee tests for the city.

  • Who is Tom Leppert?

    Do you know the Leppert Man, the Leppert Man, the Leppert Man.

    Oh do you know the Leppert Man, who lives on Wall Street hay.
    ~

    • OneDollarJuana

      Do you think Jesus could cure that Leppert?

    • tessiee

      Everywhere you go are Lepperts
      Lots of folks you know are Lepperts
      Wouldn't you like to be a Leppert, too?

  • EatsBabyDingos

    If a leper farts, is it called a "Leppert?" Or is he with that band, Deaf Leppert?

    • DaRooster

      Leppertsy,
      All my skin is falling off of me.
      I'm not half the man I used to be,
      Oh how did I,
      Get Leppertsy?
      (Beatles)

    • Dok-cupy Everything

      Can the Leppert change his spats?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Tone-deaf Leppert. Different outfit.

      • EatsBabyDingos

        Deaf Leppert's Greatest Hits:

        Cries of the Poors (I Don't Hear The)
        Hippies, Gramps and Steves -The NoCher Version
        Unringin' the Bell
        She Knew She had It Coming (When They Deposed the Welfare Queen)

  • baconzgood

    Peter O'Toole was the Mayor of Dallas? Who'da thunk it.

    • tessiee

      That's not Peter O'Toole; that's Leppert, *a* tool.

  • mavenmaven

    WIN BACK MERKA FOR RICH CONNECTED OLIGARCHS

  • Oh, he's just perfect for the US Senate. He and Toomey can compare notes…

  • Allmighty_Manos

    I also checked out Google Search myself and found out that Tom Leppert means 'giant douchebag asshole" in at least 34 languages.

    • GOPCrusher

      Is there nothing Google can't do?

  • James Michael Curley

    There is a Washington Mutual Stock Settlement in the Courts. You may get seven cents a share for your losses (If you can proove when you owned the shares). Seven Cents a share! See you in Tahiti this winter!

  • Blueb4sunrise

    Pope of Douche

  • Tundra Grifter

    Ask him about those automated WaMu home appraisals:
    http://www.lawyersandsettlements.com/features/was

    That system certainly worked out well for everyone. What happened to the in-house appraisal reviewers? Particularly in the early days of the new process, when they might have objected to vlaues they didn't believe.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      They were the first ones laid off. (CitiBank did the same thing to any of their risk analysts who had the nerve to pipe up.)

  • paris biltong

    In a related development ("capitalist shenanigans in Texas") this morning, a headline reads "Kinder Morgan to Buy El Paso." I wasn't aware that the town was for sale and also, who is this kinder Morgan? Is there a meaner Morgan? Which one is JP?

    • RedneckMuslin

      Okay, biggest typo of the day. It should have said "Kindermorgan takes over El Paso". Kindermorgan obviously means German storm troopers"

      • trondant

        Aren't the Kindermorgan a little short for stormtroopers?

        • Geminisunmars

          They start them very young these days.

      • Negropolis

        Morningchild?

  • tihond

    Time for Operation Occupy His Inbox.

    • poncho_pilot

      depends on what you mean by Inbox.

      • tihond

        All of them, Katie.

      • tessiee

        "depends on what you mean by Inbox."

        I mean, "my dainty Size 11 foot in his ass".

        Whatta you mean?

  • elviouslyqueer

    Tom Leppert believes no one has ever heard of “Google search,”

    Not to worry, Tom. I'm letting Google know, even as we speak, about my definition of "Leppert" as something involving anal beads, jello, and a taxidermied duck. Be sure to look it up!

    Kisses,

    EQ

    • Schmannnity

      Leppert is the new Santorum.

      • Geminisunmars

        Better yet, Leppert is old fermented Santorum.

    • Iam_Who_Iam

      I googled "Tom Leppert anal beads" and your comment was the top result; shouldn't we be linking to some blingy of a duck with anal beads or something?

      • elviouslyqueer

        "Tom Leppert anal" works just as well. Urban Dictionary, here I come!

        #winning!

    • Schmannnity

      You may be on to something. He refused to attend a gay pride parade in Dallas with the entire city council and the Dallas sheriff. Paging Dr. Bachmann, Dr. Marcus Bachmann. http://www.wfaa.com/community/Gay-pride-parade–1

  • Callyson

    This is an easy fix:
    The Wall Street crowd represents the same flawed values that got our country into this economic mess. They possess a false sense of entitlement and think they should be receiving government handouts and run up the debt on an imaginary credit card by making hard-working Americans and future generations pay for the bill.
    /done

    • Lascauxcaveman

      That took surprisingly little editing to become a factual statement.

  • DaSandman

    Another example of the 1% who the guillotine was invented for…

    • RedneckMuslin

      Cool! Do we get cake?!

      • DaSandman

        With buttercream frosting and sprinkles. NEXT!

      • Dok-cupy Everything

        The cake, like everything Leppert said, is a lie.

      • Chichikovovich

        Aha! Leppert knew you were rich. Bet you've got a TV too.

    • MOG2410

      I'll bring the knitting.

  • x111e7thst

    Fuck this asshole and the credit default swap he rode in on.

    • chicken_thief

      Fuck him sideways, with a chainsaw?

  • kissawookiee

    I'm not seeing the SEND YOUR GIFT OF $10, $25, $100, OR EVEN $10,000 TO STOP THE DIRTY HIPPIES NOW button. Methinks Mr. Leppert somehow doesn't quite get how this whole thing is supposed to work.

  • baconzgood

    I'll never vote for no Leppert. He should go to Molokai where he belongs.

    • Limeylizzie

      Beat me to it, I was just about to make a Father Damian comment.

      • prommie

        The "Snark Indirect" is always more elegant.

    • chicken_thief

      Let's give him a hand….

      • baconzgood

        HEY-OOOOO!

        • prommie

          You are correct, sir!

  • Crank_Tango

    5,000 signatures, huh? I could get 5,000 signatures for a stale jelly donut. By the weekend.

    • Sparky_McGruff

      Seriously — it would take about 5 minutes to get 10,000 signatures for a petition to "have the former Auditor for Washington Mutual gang raped on live TV by a dozen orangutans" The server would be hit so hard it would probably catch fire.

    • ttommyunger

      Face it, Crank; a stale jelly donut is a lot more appealing than this pee-crusted taint.

  • But but but Mister Leppert.. Did you join hands with pro-Life Perryites to pray aweh the ghey?… Did you rally with those fellow warriors under a dry Texas sun that desperately needed rain be released by their hard-of-hearing Yahweh? No? Me neither. And my dollars thrown at your web-con aren't going to change the momentum spiking across the country any more than crackers for Christ are going to yield droplets of moisture from thin air. Doesn't seem like your time spent in local office or philandering financial oversight has done much to inform your priorities, but mind yourself: I hear the burning bush visions are overrated. Try actually listening to the voices on the streets instead.

    • tessiee

      "crackers for Christ"

      I like this. I like it a LOT.

  • Nostrildamus

    Just picturing grabbing the ends of his silk tie and twisting, twisting, …

    Ah, all better now. Ready to face the week.

  • DashboardBuddha

    Supporting Rush Limbaugh quote in 3…2…1…

  • Dok-cupy Everything

    Tone-Deaf Leppert

  • SayItWithWookies

    Of course they're entitled — entitled to reasonable laws that keep lying scumbags like Tom Leppert and the people who pay him from selling worthless shit on the free market and then blaming the buyers when it blows up like they knew it would.

    • tessiee

      "it blows up like they knew it would"

      Now, now. No one *could POSSIBLY have foreseen*…
      Oh, wait.
      They've used that one already, haven't they?

  • Bonzos_Bed_Time

    Sounds like he and Texas deserve each other.

  • Polythene_Pam

    "random vague talking points. Now, sign our petition. Don't worry, you don't have to read it first, you trust us, right? And you and I both know you're probably not smart enough to understand our important politician words anyway. What's your email address?"

  • BlueStateLibel

    Hey Tom, I think we should set up a petition to bring criminal charges against Tom Leppert for fraud. I'm sure we could get way more than 5,000 signatures too.

  • Wilcoxyz

    Lemme see: Texans would want to "treat (Bernanke) pretty ugly" for trying to do his job and get the economy working, but this Leppert turd is an elected official. When is Texas seceding?

    • DahBoner

      Republicans hate any government program that actually works: SS, Medicare, The Fed, etc…

    • SayItWithWookies

      They better do it soon, 'cause Rick Scott's going to need a place to plead for political asylum.

    • Indiepalin

      When the Cowboys lose to the Rams on Sunday.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Losing to the New England (lubrul elitist yankee) Patriots ought to have done the trick already.

    • GOPCrusher

      When Rick Perry is elected President of The United States.
      Way it sounds, most Texans can't stand that asshole any better than the rest of the U.S.

    • tessiee

      "When is Texas seceding? "

      Not soon enough.

  • He's only 47% of the way to his goal. Let's see how many of the remaining 2,650 signatories have the first name "Dickhead."

  • DahBoner

    Call me an ambulance,” and it responded, “From now on, I’ll call you ‘an ambulance’. Okay?

    The new iPhone comes with a comedian app called 'Seri'…

  • VadersEX

    Go to Tom Leppert's website and enter a comment about his stupidity and hypocracy. It will post on facebook.

    Most Texas Republicans are total idiots. You have to tell them from time to time or they start thinkin' they're smart.

  • meatlofer

    How come 90% of the Cops episodes are filmed in Dallas?

    • Dok-cupy Everything

      To be fair, they do have a higher concentration of shirtless assholes.

    • Guppy06

      Because Topeka legalized wife-beating. Haven't you been paying attention?

    • OhNoGuy

      Because 10% of the time the camera malfunctions?

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    the Occupy Wall Street crowd represents the same flawed values that got our country into this economic mess.

    The Occupy Wall Street movement is calling for lower taxes on the rich, massive deregulation, and useless wars that you don't pay for? Wow, I've totally misjudged them.

  • JoshuaNorton

    “the Occupy Wall Street crowd represents the same flawed values that got our country into this economic mess.”

    Hmm. I understood all those words. And, yet, the sequence they were presented in made no sense.

    • Dok-cupy Everything

      Yahoo Serious Festival

  • paris biltong

    You want flawed values? Here's one, just out: "Citigroup Earnings Rise 74% to $3.8 Billion"

  • SayItWithWookies

    I certainly hope nobody has the email address LeppertSucksTruckNutz@gmail.com, or they're going to wonder about the random thank-you message that's about to appear in their inbox.

  • littlebigdaddy

    We need to put a margin call in on Texas' sanity. I'm sure they are undercapitalized.

  • Redrighthand

    Free government handouts are only okay when they are being given to big businesses. Everybody knows this…

  • El Pinche

    Before napalming Texas, I have to mention that Leppert, like Boosh, is a Harvard grad who is originally from NYC (moved to Dallas in 1990).
    …..eh, fuck it , napalm it, we're a giant turd farm.

    • prommie

      Texas is like Sandhurst, its where the nobility, or here in the States, the oligarchs, send their less intelligent offspring. See, e.g., Bush, George W.

  • SorosBot

    Claiming that "The Occupy Wall Street crowd represents the same flawed values that got our country into this economic mess" epitomizes the old blame-the-victims mentality that many of our plutocrat overlords share; they blame the mortgage crisis, not on the banks that conned people into taking out loans that they would be unable to repay, then bundling and selling those loans to escape the eventual loss, but on the individuals who were conned into taking those loans out. They claim that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac somehow caused the mortgage crisis instead of being victims of it, because the overlords can never be blamed for their bad acts.

    • Dok-cupy Everything

      I heard that a young buck took his food stamps into a liquor store, bought an orange and some vodka, and spent the change on blow.

      Also, don't forget how Barney Frank forced banks to make all those loans that they really didn' want to make and then bundle, resell, etc.

  • carlgt1

    shouldn't OWS start acting like a real patriotic Revolutionary War rally, and at least burn some of these scumbags in effigy, and then move up to tar & feathers?

  • DaRooster

    WaMu?? Hmm… WaMu… sounds familiar… Oh yeah, they were the ones that said I make enough to afford a $1600 mortgage… but not enough for $1250… yep… I sure miss those guys…

    NICE VALUES ASS-WIPE!!

  • chascates

    Failed banker/disgraced preacher/adulterous legislator = wisdom on family values/American exceptionalism = Republican votes/lobbyist bucks.

    Rinse (in hypocrisy) and repeat.

  • SheriffRoscoe

    The Occupy Wall Street crowd represents the same flawed values that got our country into this economic mess.

    Endless, unfunded wars and tax cuts for the rich. We just didn't know how sound those economic policies were, Leppert. Sorry. Our bad.

  • Mahousu

    Only 5,000 signatures for an online "petition"? That's not much of a standard. Your average Paultard could generate that many during the commercial breaks for "Alphas."

    Of course, it's probably about the same level of rigor he applied when auditing WaMu.

  • MrFizzy

    I say send him to a leppert colony. Oh, wait, that would be an improvement for him.

  • DonnyKerabotsos

    "Please help us reach our goal of 5,000 petition signatures by October 31! We will be sending the petition to President Obama, calling on him to denounce the angry Occupy mob."

    Holy crap!!! Five-THOUSAND signatures? In two WEEKS?

    That's .00016% of the US population…yeah, that'll make Obama take notice.

    If this guy wanted to set the bar any lower, he'd need a shovel.

  • Blueb4sunrise

    Look at his arms. Something weird looking.
    And what is the light rhomboid thing at navel height?

    • Geminisunmars

      He didn't quite finish his shape-shifting before the camera clicked.

  • mavenmaven

    OT, but relevant: Here is a news story that could be right out of Waiting for Godot in its profound meaninglessness http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/ticket/santorum-joins

    • flamingpdog

      I'm sure Nevadans are quaking in their boots at this news. I wish we could legislate limits on egomania.

    • Philosophical inquiry:

      If Santorum fell in the desert and there was no one around to hear, would he still be a flaming, hate-spewing asshole?

      Or is that the Ultimate Rhetorical Question™?

    • El Pinche

      This is good news for Thad McCotter.

    • BlueStateLibel

      Isn't this kind of like the two slowest horses on the track boycotting the Kentucky Derby? It'll show 'em, I guess, just don't know what.

  • elviouslyqueer

    HughJanus@phukyoo.biz just lent his unfailing support to Leppert. And I'm sure Siddona Sybian and Ivana Biggcok will be happy to do the same. Because democracy!

  • flamingpdog

    Leppert is originally from New Yawk City? I thought leppertsy came from Mexico.

  • DashboardBuddha

    I went to Texas to re-connect with some relatives last week. Now, as loathe as I am to make sweeping generalizations and as much as I love my cousins, I have to say that they must manufacture Cognitive Disconnect down there.

  • owhatever

    Another good Christian boy, no doubt. Hah. Texas is the Octomom of weird political zombies.

  • subsum

    Criminals are always looking to commit more crimes. This cunt is no different.

  • Antispandex

    I believe Mr. Leppert is entitled too. Entitled to an ass kicking.

  • So…he'd be running as a Democrat right?

  • HobbesEvilTwin

    stupid greedy fuck is stupid.

  • Bots Meat Commission

    It always amazes me how small these campaign donations are. $23,000? To Ernst & Young that's like 3 hours of billing.

    I'm insulted that our politicians are such cheap whores.

  • jennofark

    Keep it up, mofos, and eventually the dirty hippies will figure out that they can take you down without marching, camping, making signs, or doing anything other than REFUSING TO PAY YOU BACK.

  • EatsBabyDingos

    Deaf Leppert's Greatest Hits:

    Cries of the Poors (I Don't Hear The)
    Hippies, Gramps and Steves -The NoCher Version
    Unringin' the Bell
    She Knew She had It Coming (When They Deposed the Welfare Queen)
    Deaf Leppert's Greatest Hits:

    Cries of the Poors (I Don't Hear The)
    Hippies, Gramps and Steves -The NoCher Version
    Unringin' the Bell
    She Knew She had It Coming (When They Deposed the Welfare Queen)

  • Guppy06

    Actually, the Occupados represent the Muslim Brotherhood:
    http://floridaindependent.com/52640/adam-hasner-t

  • Barrelhse

    Isn't there an island in Hawaii for Lepperts?

  • A Leppert never changes its shorts, or something like that.

  • glamourdammerung

    Thanks for reminding everyone why more folks in the financial sector deserved jail instead of hand outs.

  • tessiee

    "They possess a false sense of entitlement and think they should be receiving government handouts and run up the debt on an imaginary credit card by making hard-working Americans and future generations pay for the bill."

    Jesus Ween!
    This should be in the dictionary next to "projection".

  • tessiee

    So, yet another spoiled rich fuck feels compelled to share with the rest of the world what all he thinks and doesn't think.
    If only we could somehow work the words "rat's ass" into the discussion.

  • ttommyunger

    Yet another reason to avoid Texas like the fucking plague.

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