Billionaire Bloomberg Terrorizes #OWS Families Out of Friday Campout

Give a Hoot!Wall Street billionaire Michael Bloomberg has been nervously “playing nice” with the Occupy Wall Street movement for a month now, because he honestly fears an Egypt-style national uprising in America that will end with most of the Wall Street plutocrats’ heads on pikes. He is correct to fear this, of course — you can only fuck over 99% of the population for so long before enough of them figure out they’ve got the advantage. Also, Bloomberg’s wife-lady is on the board of the company that “owns” the public greenspace known as Zuccotti Park/Liberty Square. So it’s going to stain Bloomberg when the jackbooted thugs and bulldozers move in on the peaceful protesters. Still, Bloomberg is hearing from his fellow kleptocrats all day long, and they are scared, and he’s scared, and they’re telling him, “Listen you had better DO something about this bullshit, it is totally getting out of hand,” and the Gulfstreams are fueled up and waiting on the tarmac, servants and nannies and mistresses and little overly groomed dogs and even wives & children at the ready.

Tomorrow night, according to Mayor Bloomberg, his hired muscle will move against the Ocupados because … uh, what’s the excuse? Cleaning! Things just need to be cleaned up, a bit. Like in San Francisco, where the protesters were held back by the jackboots while sanitation laborers took the stuff to be dumped at the landfill — haha, and then the sanitation laborers then returned the stuff to the protesters, in solidarity.

Tomorrow night is supposed to be the “Family Campout/Sleepover” at Occupy Wall Street. Lots of people who want to take part in the protests against American Kleptocracy feel they cannot, because they’ve got kids and daycare and school plays and all that. Well, this is a nice thing on a Friday evening, bring the kids in PJs and have popcorn and watch movies projected on the buildings and make it a family night. And now Bloomberg wants to move in on this particular night, because he and his .001% cronies do not want happy images of cute kids in jammies singing Woody Guthrie songs with Tom Morello or whatever. So the families have been terrorized out of attending this peaceful protest. Terrorized. That’s what it is. Mayor Bloomberg’s phone number is 311 (in New York). [Families for Occupy Wall Street/Petition]

New rule.

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    1. WhatTheHeck

      Colon cleansing. You’re talking colon cleansing, right?
      Well then. That includes all the republican candidates who have crap flowing out both ends.

  1. SorosBot

    If those protesters didn't want to be poor, they should have worked hard to become rich, like that self-made billionaire Michael Bloomberg.

  2. BaldarTFlagass

    *sniff* This reminds of the time back in 1968 that my dad took me down to the 14th Street Riots in DC. My PJs, bag of popcorn, and a wee kiddie-size gas mask.

    1. Terry

      I saw you and your Dad run by! My family was sitting in a Chinese restaurant that had a huge cook sitting in the front window drinking tea with one hand resting on a big cleaver.

  3. prommie

    The law, in its majestic equality, forbids both the rich and the poor from sleeping in Zuccotti park.

      1. Generation[redacted]

        The law allows both rich and poor to profit from hedge fund bets against credit default swaps.

    1. terriblyfamous

      The difference is, only the poors find themselves without any place to sleep except Zuccotti park.

  4. Lascauxcaveman

    If I were Bloomberg, I'd do nothing except make sure the cops more or less behave themselves until this thing blows over. I don't really see any other winning play for an ostensible mayor-for-life of NYC.

    He needs the proles more than his fellow rich guys right now.

    1. Jukesgrrl

      Yes, he needs to think about that park being a valve for steam to escape. Otherwise, pressure cooker. And you know what happens to them.

    2. Negropolis

      Hell, he might be making the calculation that he's term limited (finally), and doesn't give a shit about legacy. I mean, it's not exactly as if he cares what others think about him. He's made that abundently clear from day one, the little prig.

  5. Antispandex

    "…images of cute kids in jammies singing Woody Guthrie songs…"
    The family values party has no fear of this type of thing! Rush, or Anne the Man, could spin this into an example of hippy child abuse in two seconds! Then there's is the chance for the police to engage in some "dwarf tossing" with the little critters. You don't get that everyday…well, outside of one of those third world dictatorships we prop up.

    1. Chichikovovich

      And what do we get for that propping-up? Lanny Davis stiffed on his lawyering fees.

      You just can't expect gratitude from some people…

  6. Beowoof

    The poors are making a mess of the place where we go to talk about stealing what little money the poors have left. Well then that's settled, clean away.

    1. yrbmegr

      On the other hand, with all the poors in one place, stealing from them could not be easier. Bloomberg should consider the extreme utility of co-locating all the poors for efficient looting.

        1. yrbmegr

          Yes, but if they're all in the park, you don't need all those fancy internets. Just send over your cops to collect (I.e. “clean up”).Sent from my iPhone

        1. Geminisunmars

          "Men suffering from any of these or other medical conditions know the loss of eyebrows may be devasting."

          I would find it devasting too! And I'm not even a men.

          1. Terry

            I, by contrast, pull my out hair by hair. I sometimes even pay a woman to rip them off with wax and muslin. Otherwise, I'd have the eyebrows of a frickin Soviet dictator.

        2. James Michael Curley

          Sonds like a little extra post-retirement money for Andy Rooney serving as a paid donor.

    1. mrpuma2u

      We just need about 1 million people to feel the way you do, and it's all good. I have been in the streets helping Occupy Chicago, where the police have so far been stingy with the pepper spray. I guess Mayor Rahm-bo found out that stuff is expensive, and told them to be tight with it.

    2. Jukesgrrl

      You're not alone. I took my elderly mother to the credit union yesterday where she was moving her money from Bank of America and we had to wait a long time. They were, in their words, "slammed" with new business.

      1. FlownOver

        I bow to your heightened sense of proportion. I have to wage a continuing struggle against that little inner voice whispering "In all things, moderation."

  7. DonnyKerabotsos

    "And now Bloomberg wants to move in on this particular night, because he and his .001% cronies do not want happy images of cute kids in jammies singing Woody Guthrie songs with Tom Morello or whatever. "

    Apparently Bloomberg would prefer viral video of Tony Baloney macing toddlers.

  8. GhostBuggy

    You know, I'm getting really fucking sick of hearing about how "dirty" OWS is, and how they're doing mean things like making it hard for businesses to operate b/c they're blocking streets and so on. It's a fucking populist uprising! It's not supposed to be convenient!

    But this little scheme of Bloomberg's should work out just fine. Yes, sure, let's have America see images of kids herded into Free Speech Zones, for freedom and cleanliness.

    1. SexySmurf

      Forget "Free Speech" zones, Bloomberg will probably herd them into MetLife Stadium a la Pinochet.

    1. user-of-owls

      How long's that fucker been up there!?!? Where the fuck is Prommie!? I don't give a shit if your idiot kid just got hit by a car, get fucking Prommie on the line now or I'll call my cousin, you know, Carrion Jack? Think that brat's feeling bad now? How the fuck long has that thing been up there?? Oh, somebody's gonna pay, pal, somebody's gonna pay.

  9. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    It would seem the easy solution is to bag all the trash and put it in front of Goldman Sacks or where every before tomorrow. Then what is Bloomberg going to do?

    1. hagajim

      You shouldn't talk so badly about Jamie Dimon…besides, if they bag him they'd prolly have to dismember him first.

  10. OccupyFnChicken

    Even if the city were to honor them and let people return after the cleanup, the spirit would have been violated.

    STAY, PEOPLE. DO NOT LEAVE. Do not let the city fuck up your chi.

  11. Tundra Grifter

    That's how Gen. Douglas MacArthur got his real start up the military ladder – leading the cavalry against the Bonus Army (George Patton commanded the tanks).

    1. Barrelhse

      "There was Harwitz E. Green, just turned thirty-three
      His leather chair waits at the bank
      And Sergeant Dow Jones, twenty-seven years old
      Commanding his very own tank"

      -Jefferson Airplane, "Lather"

  12. BaldarTFlagass

    Meanwhile, when informed that the children had no popcorn, Mrs. Bloomberg was overheard to say "Let them eat chocolate covered macadamias."

  13. SayItWithWookies

    I'm sure Bloomberg and Company thought long and hard about what to do about the OWSers. "Hmmm — systemic and meaningful reform, or brute authoritarian muscle that'll only further enrage the opposition?" Then they all had a good laugh and lit their Cuban cigars with hundred dollar bills.

    1. SorosBot

      With this "cleaning" stunt, it looks like they've created a third option of oppression via passive-aggressive resistance.

  14. DaRooster

    No "…erection of tents…" I got your tent right here.
    No "… passive recreation…" and no bicycles?
    No "… removing items from trash receptacles…" Just how are you planning on "cleaning" without taking the trash?

    Oh… I get it… pot smoking, confused message having, hippies are the trash you mean.

  15. SmutBoffin

    Those opposed to occupations always play the "it's unsanitary!" card, as if they really care about the health of those doing the protesting.

      1. SmutBoffin

        And a privatized system of health care providers that no one can really afford. Who on Wall St. doesn't like that?

  16. Goonemeritus

    I know this is going to be the equivalent of showering with a toaster but I am going to raise my humble voice in defense of the Mayor Bloomberg. The Mayor has deep ties to the financial community and the Banking sector, his personal fortune is tied to his corporation that serves them. While not overtly supportive the city and the police have on the whole been pretty hands off. I know were it my billions of dollars at stake Pinkertons would be involved.

    1. mourningnmerica

      This is going to be like one of the early scenes from F.I.S.T.

      Is there any way I can invest in axe handles? Those puppies should be flying off the shelves at Depot.

  17. Generation[redacted]

    In NYC you can call the police to report offensive smells? Talk about unlimited overtime.

  18. chascates


    Entering into its eighth day, demonstrators with Occupy Austin were arrested.
    Four people were arrested for criminal trespassing early Thursday morning. The city scheduled a power washing of the patio and steps outside City Hall starting at 2 a.m. Thursday.
    Demonstrators say they were told prior to the washing that they'd be allowed to stay. When workers showed up however, members were told they had to leave or be arrested for criminal trespassing.

  19. Soylent Green

    And that's the reason to eradicate public parks. Parks, sidewalks, streets and libraries belongs to the people, and a seething pit for Free Speech. Eradicating these areas will make Free Speech available to you only when you scream at your TV set.

  20. johnnyzhivago

    What the fuck IS allowed in that stupid park?

    And Zucotti sounds foreign. Put a Mohammed in front of it and it sounds Arabian. Why is a park named for an Arab near Ground Zero?

    1. hagajim

      What is allowed at Zucotti park is discussions by Traders on how they are going to fuck us all over next time.

    2. Negropolis

      Zucotti is so Guidous it's not even funny. But, I guess Italitans are the next best brown-white people to Arabs, no?

  21. Cicada

    Muffy and Winston find that being forced to acknowledge the existence of the riled and unwashed masses really takes the zing out of the caviar. So upsetting! Thank goodness ol' Bloomie is there to remind the plebes of their proper station.

    Harrumph, merf, merf, etc.

  22. widestanceshakedown

    This is SO inconvenient; we've just closed up the house in the Hamptons for the season, and now. . . UGH. . .I can't be without Rosa ALL day tomorrow while she opens up for this weekend.

    What to do?

    1. BaldarTFlagass

      Yeah, they could pull him out of prison for this dirty mission, like they did John Cassavetes, Telly Savalas, Donald Sutherland, Charles Bronson, etc in "The Dirty Dozen." Lee Marvin FTW.

  23. Indiepalin

    Okay Bloomberg, you win. We'll abandon the protests if you allow Larry David back into New York City.

  24. SorosBot

    But hey, won't somebody please think of the bankers, making slightly less insane amounts of money than they did in the past? (h/t Atrios):

    Bankers aren’t optimistic about those gains. Options Group’s Karp said he met last month over tea at the Gramercy Park Hotel in New York with a trader who made $500,000 last year at one of the six largest U.S. banks.

    The trader, a 27-year-old Ivy League graduate, complained that he has worked harder this year and will be paid less. The headhunter told him to stay put and collect his bonus.

    “This is very demoralizing to people,” Karp said. “Especially young guys who have gone to college and wanted to come onto the Street, having dreams of becoming millionaires.”

    1. comrad_darkness

      Can I just say. Fuck 'em. Get a job and fucking make something and sell it. Contribute to the actual economy at a level commiserate with your god damn pay. You know, be an actual fucking capitalist instead of a leach.

    2. snackypants

      Were all of you Wonketeers trolling the comments on that article? Not a lot of sympathy for the bankers from the peanut gallery.

      1. rahelio

        I'm pretty late to the game, but for some reason, bloomberg news is really liberal. Like, near the "Rachel Maddow" end of the MSNBC Libtard Spectrum (Joe "Starbucks" Scarborough is on the other end).

        Maybe these comments are the norm?

  25. GorzoTheMighty

    I was so looking forward to the films projected on the buildings on family night. Who wouldn't stay up for Battleship Potemkin and Doctor Zhivago.

  26. Allmighty_Manos

    I don't know what pisses off Bloomburg and NYC elite more: The fact that they are protesting Wall Street or that they are offering free family entertainment in lower Manhattan.

    1. Terry

      They should show Ghostbusters. I'd love to see the Sta-Puff marshmallow man shown on the side of a NYC highrise.

  27. owhatever

    I am certain that Bloomie and the Aristocrats will be happy to discover the Occupiers are really demonstrating in behalf of the right to bear arms and defend the Second Amendment. Pepper spraying a sleepy little girl in her PJs is gonna be great TV. The bankers should give themselves another bonus when that happens…and it will.

  28. ParentsOccupy

    I rep the above mentioned group, we will be having a press conference 8pm Friday at 60 Wall St. to voice out about what has happened here and Parent's/Middle class standing up for change.

  29. imissopus

    There was a time when guys like Bull Bloomberg wouldn't have given the protesters twenty-four-hours notice that his people would be turning on the high-pressure hoses, so, progress?

  30. mormos

    Here in Abq when the cops did their midnight raid and told the protesters they had to vacate the University at 10 P.M., they just moved onto the sidewalk and marched up and down it. I feel the OWS should do the same. Just move onto the sidewalk and surround the park. The 1% don't like the protesters in the park? Lets see if they like them on the sidewalk outside their buildings!

    Also: STAY PEACEABLE PEOPLE! Solidarity in non-violence!

  31. CrunchyKnee

    First they came for the bicycles and I didn't say anything because I hocked my bike to buy hobo beans, then they came for the skateboards, and I didn't say anything because it was run over by a police car, then they….ah fuck it. Occupy All The Things!!!!!111!11one!

  32. prommie

    Bootin' them dirty hippies out of the park is more of a job for McGruff the Crime Dog, rather than Woodsie Owl, doncha think? Its time to Take a Bite out of The Right To Assemble.

  33. Chichikovovich

    OK everyone. Send messages on all the Tea Party boards you know of saying that there will be a counter-demonstration Friday to show love of America and Second Amendment freedoms. Tell them that all the hippies are going to be gone because – I don't know – tell them that there is some pagan holiday, Téfestermöckingnat which requires dancing naked in a forest. They'll buy that. Tell them to make lots of signs talking about second amendment solutions and how proud they are to be carrying major firepower, etc. And how nobody is going to push them around or tread on them or whatever. And a couple of "Give me liberty or give me a full face blast of pepper-spray" signs.

    And make sure somebody is up on a balcony to film it.

  34. V572-⁂½‡‡‡‡‡

    Ha ha, I remember sitting at home in suburban Chicago in 1968, watching the police riot in Grant Park on teevee with my parents. I was all, "Look at what those awful cops are doing!" and my father was all, "If I were a cop, and I saw you, I'd do the same thing." My hair was a bit longer then than it is today.

    Family moments like that last a lifetime.

    1. Beanball

      I was in Chicago that week for the police riots in both Lincoln and Grant parks and a lot of other festivities. Let me assure you that that people in PJs are easy targets and it isn't a whole hell of a lot of fun.

      On a happier note, the LA city council passed an ordinance supporting Occupy LA and have scheduled a resolution to withdraw city investment funds from banks not co-operating in mortgage readjustments to deposit said monies (billions of US dollars) into banks that are actively helping out (and there are a couple here in SoCal). Discussion of details due Nov 21.

  35. terriblyfamous

    "…because he and his .001% cronies do not want happy images of cute kids in jammies singing Woody Guthrie songs with Tom Morello or whatever."

    That image just warms the cockles of this union organizer's heart.

  36. awwalk56

    I urge President Obama to seek NATO support in conducting strategical air strikes to protect OWS protesters in New York, Boston and DENVER! Twitter or Email the WhiteHouse!

  37. outragedcitizen

    Hey, Bloomy, guess who in NYC votes! That's right, most of those 99%ers at OWS. And your rich buddies, yeah, most of them live in the 'burbs – can't really vote for ya, buddy.

  38. Madam Killjoy

    I was at OWS on Monday. They are not slobs. They're keeping the space clean to the point of filtering their gray dish-washing water to hydrate the mums planted in "the park" which is actually a very tiny concrete space.

  39. Negropolis

    Oscar the Grouch is pissed, y'all.

    If they really cared about cleaning up NYC, they'd start in Staten Island, which is basically the New Jersey of New York.

  40. MiniMencken

    We are being stabbed in the back by these November Criminals and their fellow travelers, the Bourgeois Nationalists! I, for one, stand for a resolution of the Brenner Pass Question!

  41. Ruhe

    "Gulfstreams are fueled up and waiting on the tarmac, servants and nannies and mistresses and little overly groomed dogs and even wives & children at the ready."

    You're channeling Delillo and I love it.

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