Pareene, what are you doing over at Salon these days? Oh you are writing crazy common-sense proposals like this:
So my immodest proposal is simply this: Individuals and households in the bottom 99 percent who owe debt to any large financial institution that received federal government support during and after the 2008 crisis should see their debt forgiven. That would certainly stimulate the economy, as most people would suddenly find themselves with a great deal more money to spend on iPads (and food, and clothing, and housing, and healthcare). The debt can be forgiven by decree or if the government really wants to it can step in to pay it itself; I don’t much care either way. (Though it’d be nice to see it just wiped off the books, to enrage the banks.)
Let’s wipe the debt of the 99 percent off the books, tell the financial sector to eat it, and get on with our lives.
[Salon]
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But only if they buy American made products. (Do we make anything other than 747s? Do we still make 747s?)
We also lead the world in kill-people technology and weapons.
USA! USA! USA!!!
Ruger, Colt, Smith & Wesson, Remington, Springfield Armory… you know, all the basic commodities.
Donuts. The really good ones with the colorful sprinkles. And bacon cheeseburgers. I'll think of other stuff later, but now you made me hungry.
~Gov Chris Christie
Too bad for him the local donut shop got shut down by an ICE raid.
Junk bonds. We make a lotta them.
They can call it a Jubilee year, then the Evangelicals can't complain.
Well not in public, but privately they'll complain that it's too Jew-ey, and needs moar of Supply-Side Jeebus's Muscular Xtian Virtues.
today we are all "job creators"
What about corporations? Corporations are people too!
Precisely. They just already got theirs.
If you can't fuck it, it's not a person.
We may not be able to fuck them, but they can certainly fuck us.
I just can't see a downside. Although the boost to the funeral home business would be marginal, even with a high banker suicide rate.
Instead of wasting their well-fed carcases on funeral homes, turn them over to the soup kitchens. Voila! No polluting groundwater with the formaldehyde runoff, reduced carcinogenic formaldehyde usage, MOAR food for the hungry. Alternatively, just torch them alive in their McMansions. The ash is very good for the soil, I'm told.
Yeah boy! I'm goin to celebrate with wienies in my hobo beans and a little Mad Dog.
Big spender!
Hey if I didn't have that student loan bill I might actually be able to afford health insurance.
I'M IN!!! Bank of America mortgage, SUCK IT!!
Dang, I just mailed it last week.
Hell, I'd be happy if BoA just reset the interest rate on my mortgage to the current rate. If banks were simply forced to give re-fis at the current rate for anyone who asks — whether they're underwater or not — it would be an astonishing economic stimulus. Imagine a few tens of millions of people all with a couple hundred dollars a month more to spend…
Actually, I'd be ecstatic for that. I really want to refi, and I'm not technically underwater, although most of my equity is gone, so I wouldn't be over 20% equity as I was when I made the down payment.
But yeah, that would abso-smurfin-lutely stimulate my personal economy, and it's pretty fucking do-able (as opposed to forgiving all debt).
It's a great idea, but it's not even on the table. I guess they figure we're all going to default eventually, so they need to collect as much interest as they can before we do.
Actually, the Obama administration is kicking this around:
http://www.npr.org/2011/09/07/140242036/how-mortg...
And I agree, I think forcing the banks to drop rates to today's rates would be an incredible spur to the economy, and help anyone who is underwater or close feel a little better about their standing.
The real problem is that if we default… the government reimburses them or they get to take the loss as a tax write-off so they have no real interest in helping you (or me) out.
I tried to refi… I was told I don't make enough money. I asked, "You're saying that I have no late payments and apparently I can afford over $1500 but I can't afford $1200?"
"Yep." was the reply.
Maybe we can get Bono to step in and support this. He does it for other Third World shitholes, after all.
Maybe if we remind him that, if debt free, we might be able to actually afford tickets to U-2 concerts, he might consider it.
Sure. Just as soon as he gets voted off "Dancing With the Stars"
Awsomesauce!!
Yes, but the US is not large enough to hold his ego. That's why he has to go to Africa.
Or at least reduce what I owe on my house to what I could actually sell it for…that way banks get paid something and I get a benefit from how badly they fucked the economy over with their giant shit-ass house of cards.
Does Alex have a few too many credit card bills?
Actually, some sort of massive debt forgiveness/restructuring would be smart, although it would have to be coupled with some other form of reform that would prevent us from just going back to our old habits again.
Lio, Esq: that is so…so…. UN-Amerikan. It ain't the way we roll, dude. Cancer of the larynx? – smoke through the fucking hole in your neck; so fat and disgusting you get your stomach stapled? – binge on Cain's best pizza in the recovery room; debt forgiven – that calls for a serious par-tay. On the plastic, of course.
Curse you for being right!!! {shakes fist impotently}
Cain could just move a decimal point and call it the 99.9 plan. And, as long as the banks get their billion dollar bonuses — big banker badger doesn't give a shit.
Hell, I'd settle for applying this to the unemployed. But it's nice to hear that some people still have the ability to dream…
A rim shot, not a bank shot, on a bank holiday.
Would this proposal apply to street drugs like meth and reefer? It would be nice if our too big to fail dealers would be willing to give back to the community.
I thought you were going to suggest eating the rich.
Disappointed.
You might want to re-think that after looking at this. Yeah, yeah, it's European royalz not real 'Murican riche, but hey rich is rich.
Looks like perfectly good soup stock.
As a cook of many years' experience, I'm telling you: the older the fowl, the better the stew. Those two would make a fine fond.
See, Apple does have a monopoly!!!
I thought he was going to suggest eating the children of the poor.
Pareene wasn't swift enough.
Did I say you were on a roll? Can I have some of whatever you're ingesting/inhaling?
Thnx. Too much coffee perhaps.
DAMN it. I can't drink coffee, it makes me vomit blood (don't ask me why, I used to love it, and the doctor has no clue either).
Back to third-grade snark. (takes another hit)
Puns like those get my Irish up.
Like the original Rosicrutionist Finn McCool; it's Finn again, a wake or no.
love IT!
"more money to spend on iPads (and food, and clothing, and housing, and healthcare"
I was thinking beer. Good beer, not that lite crap.
From the local microbrewery!
Capital idea!
Bailing out the banks and thus rewarding corporate theft? It's the only way to save our economy.
Bailing out actual debtors? Moral hazard! The sanctity of the contract! A promise is a promise! Caveat emptor!
All my problems are solved.
I get the feeling this proposition would get the same reception the Bonus Army got.
Yes, but the up side is we'd know who was going to win the next two theater war we get into.
Are all the folk at Salon stoned, or just this dickwad?
Wha?!
I have to go charge up my credit cards.
Seriously! If I'd known about this I would have bought the fancy toilet paper all these years and not that scratchy kind.
Well, a lot of people got into debt through no fault of their own – but some got into debt being assholes who wanted a bigger house than you and I have – and a summer house and 2-3 BMW's etc….
I believe in forgiveness, but not forgiveness of greediness and stupidity!
I definitely believe in the concept of debt forgiveness, but this really screws people who acted responsibly and did not (pretend to) pay 3000% of what a house is worth during the bubble. So now the responsible people who didn't buy a $60,000 home for $800,000 are just stuck with the fucking attendant higher rents?
I've a better solution: let the housing market fucking crash.
It doesn't make you vomit coffee?
That would be my situation as well.
I almost punched the maggot in the fucking face… almost. This was the moment I realized, "Hey, something ain't right."
Also about the time I got hip to Wonkette… Thank you all for the venting.
Seen that proposal. Unfortunately, my mortgage is not backed by Freddie/Fannie Mae (I checked), so it would never apply to me. ??!! Not sure why mine's not Freddie or Fannie. It was a Countrywide mortgage, that I fully qualified for (at the time), and put over 20% down. It wasn't "jumbo". Eventually Countrywide folded into BOA, and here we are.
NtD, my little love-bug, I find your curiousity about my various exudates rather … interesting.
Since any quantity of coffee (even in ice cream) causes me to hork violently, I'm usually not paying attention to the contents. Except that blood always stands out if you're horking it up because it's a bright, violent red, you know? I assume a lot of the other horkage is coffee, but it's a little tough to pay attention under the circs.
That's terrible. Owing to an unspeakable condition, my body can no longer tolerate popcorn, which is not particularly addictive, but it sucks in a "hmm : ( Look at those nice people enjoying their lovely popcorn" kind of way. Coffee is one of only three chemical vices (& chocolate and nicotine, natch) remaining to me. I imagine I'd become addicted to anus burgers or Lean Cuisine or something if I was forced to give up coffee.
Thanks for the sympathy. I used to love coffee and drink it by the flask until the Mysterious Menace struck. Now the smell of it nauseates me, which is very sad.
OTOH, it does keep me from downing a bottle of Kahlua and a bottle of vodka each night, which is not such a bad thing. (sniff!)
Yeah, I don't think my mortgage is held by Freddie/Fannie either. To do it right, they would have to offer the chance to anyone to refi with Freddie/Fannie and dump their own loan (assuming you are not jumbo…, let those people deal with the banks).
Word. When my wife and I tried to buy a house (post 2008) was when I realized that these bankers were all bugfuck loco.
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