• May 26, 2012

Dumb Ape Who Sings Football Jingle Fired For Being Giant Bunghole

by Wonkette Jr.  

Dirtbag clown/redneck millionaire Randall Williams — who goes by his legendary father’s name to better fleece the poors — done went and half-assed called Obama a “Hitler” on the Fox News, and you know you can only do that in code, or while huntin’ coon with Rick Perry or whatever. So the football show has fired “Bocephus.” How could Hank Jr. do this to the South, which was supposed to rise again, like Southern Jesus?

This means, we guess, that the football show will no longer have that shitty re-written version of “Hank Junior” doing his shitty 1980s name-dropping Nashville schmaltz, “All My Rowdy Friends Are Coming Over Tonight,” itself a craven sequel to his earlier idiot singalong, “All My Rowdy Friends.”

So he compared Obama to Hitler, and Boehner to … Netanyahu? And then said Joe Biden and Barack Obama were “the enemy.” Then he probably farted for a good long time on the chair and the Murdoch people had to burn it behind Fox News headquarters, in that incinerator they use all the time for “the truth.”

Randall Williams is a dumb turd. He should run for president of the Tea Party and the whole of America. He is the perfect Successful American, in that he inherited his lucrative business and still couldn’t buy any talent or brains and also is so dumb that he went walking one time and managed to fall off a mountain, losing his face in the process, which is why his poorly reconstructed head resembles a dumber, less charming version of one of those pan-faced muppets from “The Electric Teeth.” Here’s an article from five years ago when he was arrested for sexually assaulting some teen-ager in a hotel. GO FOOTBALL AND USA NOW!!! [NBC]

{ 281 comments }

hagajim October 4, 2011 at 12:31 am

HW JR. 4 PREZ..RU READY 4 SOME DUMBFUCK!!!!!

CapnFatback October 4, 2011 at 1:19 am

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME GODWIN‽ ‽ ‽ ‽ ‽

WhatTheHolyHeck October 4, 2011 at 10:37 am

Needz moar OMGFREESPEECH

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 11:01 am

I'm sure there will be plenty.

fartknocker October 4, 2011 at 12:33 am

That was 3 minutes 31 seconds of stupid. I'm guessing the A on his hat is Tennessee for Asshole.

user-of-owls October 4, 2011 at 6:12 pm

I suspected it illustrated how much of the alphabet he's learned so far.

HempDogbane October 4, 2011 at 12:34 am

Admit it, that's one fine hat for bein' on the teevee.

GunToting[Redacted] October 4, 2011 at 9:22 am

Roll turd!

NorthStarSpanx October 4, 2011 at 11:01 am

Wow, Sarah Palin has really let herself go. . .

Callyson October 4, 2011 at 12:39 am

This moron should have listened to his own lyrical advice:
A tongue can accuse and carry bad news the seeds of distrust it will sow
But unless you've made no mistakes in your life be careful of stones that you throw
A neighbor was passing my garden one time she stopped and I knew right away
That it was gossip not flowers she had on her mind
And this is what I heard my neighbor say
That bad girl down the street should be run from our midst
She drinks and she talks quite a lot
She knows not to speak to me or my child my neighbor then smiled and I thought
A tongue can accuse…
A car speeded by and the screaming of brakes a sound that made my blood chill
For my neighbor's one child had been pulled from the path
And saved by a girl lying still
The child was unhurt and my neighbor cried out oh who was that brave girl so sweet
I covered the crushed broken body and sad the bad girl who lived down the street
A tongue can accuse… http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Be-Careful...

Chichikovovich October 4, 2011 at 9:31 am

Man, even by country music standards that is some maudlin tripe. If Randall had written that while Hank Sr. was alive, the old man would have tossed this no-talent regression to (below the) mean off the mountain himself.

neiltheblaze October 4, 2011 at 9:44 am

The sing-songey rhyming scheme is right out of the Hallmark trash bin.

HELisforHEL October 4, 2011 at 11:04 am

Oy, it reads like one of those ghost-girl-saves-the-teens-in-the-burning-car stories from 8th grade. He & Kesha should become writing partners.

He definitely didn't inherit any of his Dad's talent. I suspect ole Hank's little swimmies must have been packed with booze when they took that trip up Ms. Hank William's girlie bits. Alcohol poisoned zygote production would at least explain why his son is so fukkin stupid.

BklynIlluminati October 4, 2011 at 12:42 am

I hated that song anyway. The only enemy you have Hank is your colossal ignorance and the fact you seemed have lost your self respect running around looking like that yikes!

Barb October 4, 2011 at 12:43 am

He's a living monument to the irrelevance of genes in determining ability and/or talent.
I don't think his attempted sexual assault on that teen girl should have been mentioned in this article though. He was probably just high on drugs and thought he was at a family reunion.

PuckStopsHere October 4, 2011 at 7:59 am

Damn. Now THAT is a throw-down!

Barb October 4, 2011 at 8:23 am

Thanks and good morning!

Texan_Bulldog October 4, 2011 at 9:07 am

In Hank's defense, her name was Holly Hornbeak–he probably thought she was a porn star.

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 10:10 am

Also in Hank Jr.'s defense, any girl in his (ahem) neck of the woods would have been married and divorced at least a couple of times before she reached her teens.

Callyson October 4, 2011 at 12:49 am

Also:
Williams has said he's interested in running as a Republican in 2012 for a U.S. Senate seat in Tennessee.
Watch your back, Texas and Arizona–there's a new candidate for wing – nuttiest state in town…

Bonzos_Bed_Time October 4, 2011 at 12:50 am

Skoalrebel will not be happy to hear this :-(

LesBontemps October 4, 2011 at 10:05 am

This guy makes Skoalrebel look like Plato.

memzilla October 4, 2011 at 12:52 am

This is another reason to close the border and put up a big fence. And by "border," I mean the Mason-Dixon Line.

One_who_wanders October 4, 2011 at 9:35 am

I'd just point out that one of the more liberal states, Maryland, is just south of the Mason-Dixon line, in other words – Don't leave us down there!

Terry October 4, 2011 at 10:04 am

Exactly. Maryland should put up check stations on the bridges along the Potomac River. Maybe we allow Alexandria and Arlington to join us, but the rest….feh.

MissNancyPriss October 4, 2011 at 11:15 am

Not to generalize, but those of us manning the check stations will know who to let in, and who to kick back, by looking at em. When talking about the South, you pretty much can just a book by its cover.

carolinaswamp October 4, 2011 at 10:13 am

Oh no! Please! Don't leave us down here in the dark alone with the People of Wal-Mart!

prommie October 4, 2011 at 10:25 am

We'd even lose a chunk of South Jersey, which would not necessarily be a bad thing.

Guppy06 October 4, 2011 at 10:33 am

The Mason-Dixon Line is the border between MD and PA. At the time, DE was still part of PA. So both DE and NJ are considered north of it.

/pedant

poncho_pilot October 4, 2011 at 1:03 am

worst. Walter Sobchak impression. ever.

you're not even fucking Jewish, Hank.

Nothingisamiss October 4, 2011 at 7:23 am

Shomer Shabbos!!

FNMA October 4, 2011 at 8:12 am

Shut the fuck up, Donnie!

Doktor Zoom October 4, 2011 at 9:35 am

The niggerhead doesn't enter in to this!

Doktor Zoom October 4, 2011 at 1:03 am

As One_Man_Band said in another thread:

Hank Williams Jr. recently said Obama was just like Hitler.

Conversely, no one's ever said that Hank Jr. was just like Hank Senior.

(I say, if you're going to steal a comment, steal something good!)

poncho_pilot October 4, 2011 at 1:07 am

needs more dying in the back of a car.

OkieDokieDog October 4, 2011 at 1:29 am

I do enjoy the song Troopers Hollar by Hank Wms. III

Radiodead October 4, 2011 at 7:34 am

(I say, if you're going to steal a comment, steal something good!)
Looks like Randall stole daddy's name, adhering to this adage.

imissopus October 4, 2011 at 1:03 am

<facerocks>

Doktor Zoom October 4, 2011 at 1:07 am

I found this over at Free Republic: http://oi56.tinypic.com/10znyxg.jpg

poncho_pilot October 4, 2011 at 1:09 am

that's confusing without context. are they comparing Obama to Hitler or saying they both spoke "the truth"?

oh, wait…free republic…never mind.

Barb October 4, 2011 at 1:09 am

How hard up for filled airtime is Fox News if they are pondering, "I wonder what Hank Williams Jr. is thinking about right now?" This is a man who's dog learned to scoot his ass across the carpet by watching his master do it.

Hank wrote a song called "McCain/Palin Tradition," which has lyrics referring to Palin as a "good lookin' dish." The dish she most reminds me of is scrapple; chicken lips and pig peckers, help together by mush.

LesPaultard October 4, 2011 at 9:32 am

Her words/thoughts have the organization of pulled pork.

hmmm, pulled pork…..

Mojopo October 4, 2011 at 9:51 am

Barb is awesome all day – thanks for the visual of scooting!

LesBontemps October 4, 2011 at 10:10 am

Where do you find a meal like that? 'Cause that's someplace I want to be sure to avoid.

lowaltflier October 4, 2011 at 10:30 am

Pennsylvania. I saw them making this on the Dirty Jobs show.
Must be an aquired taste.

ChuckieJesus October 4, 2011 at 10:35 am

Scrapple is Pennsylvania chitlins. And I am the kind of girl who eats the pickled pigs feet, so pass it on over here. Been in the midwest too long, all they got is this weird lye covered fish crap.

HistoriCat October 4, 2011 at 11:26 am

Ugh – scrapple. My mom used to get that … I tried to tell her that we weren't in a Depression, so there was no need to eat that. These days I guess that argument isn't so convincing.

MaxUdargo October 4, 2011 at 4:20 pm

Gretchen wanted to "pick his brain." Slim pickins.

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 9:07 pm

"lyrics referring to Palin as a "good lookin' dish." "

Translation: Most of her teeth and a womb that's vacant at least some of the time.

GeorgiaBurning October 4, 2011 at 1:10 am

"Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son"- was that Dean Wormer or Hank Senior? If this guy wasn't related to Hank Williams, he'd be the pit man at a Jiffy Lube.

mookwrthwilson October 4, 2011 at 10:43 am

Pit Man? They wouldn't let this loser anywhere near the cars. He'd be in the cashier's booth or maybe the guy who points you into the garage bay, although he'd probably fuck that up too.

bagofmice October 4, 2011 at 1:11 am

My turn.

You know who else compared people to Hitler?

mrblifil October 4, 2011 at 1:37 am

That one is making my brain hurt. It's like an Escher sketch of "you know who else" jokes.

I think if Hitler had had a son, he would have made a more productive contribution to society than Hank Sr. dickheaded failure ever could or ever will.

emmelemm October 4, 2011 at 2:37 am

Now there's a screenwritin' pitch. (Or a great first novel, if you're, you know, highbrow.)

Secret son/descendents of Hitler discovered! (Sort of like the "secret descendents of Jesus"/Dan Brown type stuff.) What diabolical doings have they been up to all this time? Or, conversely, maybe they're the nicest folks in the world, and their lives are ruined by their secret being discovered! Or maybe, they live as normal folks, but as their secret is about to be broadcast to the world, they are forced to silence their betrayers… forever!

Someone with more talent and imagination than me get on this, stat!

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 9:09 pm

"It's like an Escher sketch"

Then make sure you don't turn it upside down and shake it.

donner_froh October 4, 2011 at 7:28 am

Simon Wiesenthal?

not that Dewey October 4, 2011 at 7:31 am

Alvy Singer?

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 7:39 am

The collective Wonkette yesterday, today, and forever, amen?

jodyleek October 4, 2011 at 8:53 am

Hitler?

starfanglednut October 4, 2011 at 9:31 am

Ahhhhh! Beat me to it!

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 9:11 am
Tundra Grifter October 4, 2011 at 9:51 am

Eva Braun?

BornInATrailer October 4, 2011 at 10:10 am

Hitler's mom?

SorosBot October 4, 2011 at 10:10 am

Usenet?

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 10:25 am

Mel Gibson?

HelmutNewton October 4, 2011 at 12:14 pm

All of 'em (teabaggers), Katie!

rickmaci October 4, 2011 at 1:14 am

By "3 Stooges" was he referring to the 3 idiots who sat there on the Fox set couch smiling through this "moran"s" whole racist rant?

mrblifil October 4, 2011 at 1:31 am

I thought he meant the first 3 Stooges albums, seeing as how he's a big famous rock star and whatnot.

LesBontemps October 4, 2011 at 10:14 am

Raw Power FTW!

CapnFatback October 4, 2011 at 1:16 am

♪ ♫“All my racist friends are comin’ over tonight!”♫♪

Doktor Zoom October 4, 2011 at 1:20 am

Aaaand, it looks like the Teatard Talking Point is beginning to coalesce around variations on this, from Freeplandia poster "1malumprohibitum": Actually he never compared Obama to Hitler. What he said was Boehner and Obama Golfing was like Hitler and Netanyahu golfing. In other words, you could not find two more diametrically opposed people to play golf. He was no more likening Obama to Hitler than he was calling Boehner Netanyahu, ( which wouldnt even make sense as Boehner on his best day couldn’t even polish Bibi’s shoes.)

See, it would be ridiculous to compare Boehner to Netanyahu, so there's no way that Williams meant that Obama was like Hitler, although really, when you think about it, he kind of is. But clearly, libruls have just missed the fine subtlety of Hank Williams Jr's nuanced analogy.

(For a moment there, I was worried that typing "nuance" in proximity to "Hank Williams Jr." might make my computer asplode…)

EDIT: Oh, dear. Freeper "BenKenobi" thinks he has the winning comparison: To be fair, Obama’s only had 3 million die on his watch frm abortion.

UPDATED EDIT: And some post-racial analysis from Freeper "RummyChick": I saw a clip of the black girl on The View raking Barbara Walters over the coals for saying the name on the rock. It was astounding to see. She didn’t have a problem with Whoopi saying it but was greatly offended at Barbara.

NOT ONCE DID ANYONE MENTION THAT IT IS THE NAME OF A FLOWER.

rahelio October 4, 2011 at 2:35 am

I understand the impulse to "study the enemy." Shit, back in the day, I used to read the Loonie Moonie Times for kicks. But going to FreeperKKK.com gives me heart palpitations. Your courage is appreciated.

elfgoldsackring October 4, 2011 at 3:53 am

FFS, later on Gretchen even says "you're comparing the president to one of the most hated people in history" and he says "that's true". Hoist by his own retard.

One_who_wanders October 4, 2011 at 9:38 am

Fair notice "Hoist by his own retard." Stealing this!

Nothingisamiss October 4, 2011 at 7:26 am

Doktor Zoom….you have great courage, my friend. Please use the brain bleach, and make sure you drink lots of fluids today to wash out the scum left on your soul.

Texan_Bulldog October 4, 2011 at 9:10 am

Hahahahaha…you said 'nuance' in the same sentence as Hank Williams Jr. Hahahahaha…gotta go get a drink of water.

Tundra Grifter October 4, 2011 at 9:54 am

DZ:

Well played!

Of course, when progressives such as John Kerry and Dick Durbin use "nuanced analogy" regarding the US Military and German soldiers, that is immediately reduced by the right wing to "They called them 'Nazis!'"

Fare la Volpe October 4, 2011 at 10:18 am

I saw a clip of the black girl on The View raking Barbara Walters over the coals for saying the name on the rock. It was astounding to see. She didn’t have a problem with Whoopi saying it but was greatly offended at Barbara.

NOT ONCE DID ANYONE MENTION THAT IT IS THE NAME OF A FLOWER.

Can someone please explain to me what the hell she's talking about? I cannot bring myself to waste brain cells figuring out Teatard prattle.

Guppy06 October 4, 2011 at 10:38 am
Fare la Volpe October 4, 2011 at 10:55 am

Derp, thank you. I caught a bad case of The Dumb this morn.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 11:00 am

Wait, "niggerhead" is the name of a flower? Who the fuck named that? Davis Jefferson Linnaeus?

Fare la Volpe October 4, 2011 at 11:41 am

The same guy who named it Rapeseed.

not that Dewey October 4, 2011 at 7:15 pm

The NYPD prefer this variety.

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 10:33 am

"Actually he never compared Obama to Hitler. What he said was Boehner and Obama Golfing was like Hitler and Netanyahu golfing."

OK, so he never *compared* Obama to Hitler. What he said was that Obama was *like* Hitler. That clears up the…
Oh, wait.
No.
No, it doesn't.
It just demonstrates that the person who posted that is a dumb shit who doesn't understand the meaning of simple words like "compare".

Native_of_SL_UT October 4, 2011 at 11:37 am

I see the nuance here. He's not comparing Obama to Hitler. He's just saying that we can solve our political problems by sending one side of the debate to the "Showers."

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 9:12 pm

That sounds like a very, um, final solution.

OkieDokieDog October 4, 2011 at 1:20 am

What FOX exec thought it would be a good idea or gee, I don't know – relevant, to even ask Hank Jr. to "weigh in" on the GOP field? Was Ted Cat Scratch Fever not available?

poncho_pilot October 4, 2011 at 1:27 am

maybe this was an audition. he could be getting his own show soon.

johnnyzhivago October 4, 2011 at 7:06 am

"Swamp Logging Storage Lockers"

johnnyzhivago October 4, 2011 at 7:06 am

The same idiots who would ask Sarah Palin to comment on middle east peace negotiations.

LetUsBray October 4, 2011 at 9:56 am

Nooge heard the old head of his local draft board was in town and therefore just to be on the safe side busy accumulating a week's worth of dump in his pants like the big tough guy he is.

CapnFatback October 4, 2011 at 1:24 am

This is good news for Toby Keith.

(I know, I know, it's my second Toby Keith snark in a week's time. Blame it on the comedy rule of the "hard c.")

FNMA October 4, 2011 at 8:15 am

Let's see, Tony Keith is a cocksucker.
OK, I see how that works.

NorthStarSpanx October 4, 2011 at 10:44 am

On a slightly redeeming side, I thought it was pretty cool of Toby Kieth to embarrass Fox News re: Sarah Palin's Real American Stories:

"Fox lifted an old interview I gave in 2008 to someone else & are misrepresenting to the public in order to promote Sarah Palins Show. WOW," [LL Cool J] tweeted.

Likewise, Toby Keith never sat down with Sarah Palin, Keith's spokesman told HifFix. "We were never contacted by Fox," Keith's spokesman said. "I have no idea what interview it's taken from. They're promoting this like it's a brand new interview."

HarryButtle October 4, 2011 at 1:25 am

Fox News. Perfect fer folks who done fell off'n a mountain and landed on their heads.

Guppy06 October 4, 2011 at 1:25 am

Teabagger boycott in 3… 2…

Seriously, Disney is biting the hand that feeds them in this case.

HeadsIWin October 4, 2011 at 1:29 am

After Rush and Hank Jr. – for balance- they would bring in Sharpton for color commentary and have Kanye produce the next awful intro number except rednecks are apparently the only demographic gullible enough to lure in their advertisers. Come on, progressives, drink more shitty beer!

FlipOffResearch October 4, 2011 at 1:30 am

One thing I can gather from your very emphatic statements this morning is that you'r still drunk on your ass from last night.

mrblifil October 4, 2011 at 1:30 am

Why that boy, I say that boy's about as sharp as a cue ball. BALL that is…

Monsieur_Grumpe October 4, 2011 at 8:43 am

That boy, I say that boy is about as subtle as a hand grenade in a barrel of oatmeal.

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 9:19 pm

[sotto voce a la Foghorn Leghorn] Pay attention when I'm talkin' to ya, boy.

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 8:53 am

I do declare that this gentleman is a few crows short of a proper murder. I say, that boy's a few ears short of a bushel, even, a few fathoms short of a riverbottom. I do say that he's about as self aware as boll weevil in a cottonbud, and as satisfied as a tick on a dog, I'll tell you what.

I'm running out of (made-up) homespun Suthanisms…

Biel_ze_Bubba October 4, 2011 at 10:10 am

"A few cans short of a six-pack" should cover it for this goober.

Nopantsmcgee October 4, 2011 at 11:02 am

I say, that boy''s about as sharp as a sack o' wet mice. MICE that is.

Barb October 4, 2011 at 1:31 am

I just went over to Amazon.com and looked up Hank's song, "A Country Boy Can Survive." The release date was September 21, 1993 and under "customer reviews" there are NONE, not a single one. Even Playtex Tampons got one review:
"It was a decent buy, it is not my first choice for feminine products but serves it purpose. Packaging was very good."
Five days a month, cramps, bloating and all, people care more about tampons than Hank.

OkieDokieDog October 4, 2011 at 1:47 am

Hank Jr. should start selling Bocephus tampons for GOP/Teabagger candidates.
When your bunghole needs plugging cause it won't stop running.

or something.

rahelio October 4, 2011 at 2:24 am

Considering a used tampon has more sense than good ole Randy here – three drinks ago – it makes sense.

snoopyfan2010 October 4, 2011 at 7:39 am

Were the tampons listed in the "Those who viewed this item also viewed these" section? If so, that is your answer to why country boys can survive.

Monsieur_Grumpe October 4, 2011 at 8:45 am

Tampons are useful. Hank, not so much.

Barrelhse October 4, 2011 at 8:58 am

Bloody shame.

__kth__ October 4, 2011 at 11:14 am

"Country Boy Can Survive", in case anyone was unaware how godawful dumb and horrible that song is. A really great glimpse into the abyss that is Hank Jr's mind.

HistoriCat October 4, 2011 at 11:35 am

Come on I love that song! Idiot rednecks boasting about how they can survive without any help from anyone.

As long as they can buy ammunition and gasoline, of course. Wait – what do you mean there's no more ammo and gas after society collapses?? You want me to walk?? That's not Real Mercan!

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 9:23 pm

"Look, all I need is a cabin in the woods, some food, gas, electricity, water, a girlfriend, a gun, a hunting license, and some ammo!
'
'
'
…and maybe a Jacuzzi."

Dashboard_Jesus October 5, 2011 at 3:22 am

fuck do I LOVE your comments

SheriffRoscoe October 4, 2011 at 2:02 am

It's a pity, too. His dad was such a great talent. Oh wait, I'm thinking of Gene Autry.

Papa_Uniform October 4, 2011 at 2:03 am

Hank has to be a world class asshat. He even made the morans on Fuxx uncomfortable.

chascates October 4, 2011 at 2:04 am

Now he can record as Luke the Drifter Junior.

Tundra Grifter October 4, 2011 at 9:56 am

Since his real first name ain't Hank, I'd say Luke the Grifter.

ProudLibunatic October 4, 2011 at 2:05 am

Yes!
Pan faced muppet!
You nailed it, Jr.!

MiniMencken October 4, 2011 at 2:17 am

Well, when Hank Williams, Sr. was Junior's age, he'd been dead for 33 years. Sometimes the fruit does fall pretty far from the tree.

henrypuppyhead October 4, 2011 at 2:31 am

I don't think ESPN had any issue with his comments (this is Disney after all). I think they were just flat out embarrassed by the sheer buffoonery. "Hehe, sure like me some of them Gretchen titties, mmmhmmm."

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 2:40 am

Dumb Ape Who Sings Football Jingle Fired For Being Giant Bunghole

Wait, you can be fired from Fox for that?

Behold, humanity, your master race!

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 2:55 am

Are you ready for a pitfall!

DesertTed October 4, 2011 at 3:05 am

Fox news, will you please have Faith Hill on so she can say something stupid and then NBC will get rid of her crappy opening song on Sunday Night Football?

Texan_Bulldog October 4, 2011 at 9:13 am

I think Faith & her hubby Tim are closet Dems (she sang at one of Obama's inauguration balls). Don't think they're going to be mouthing off something stupid like that. And, no, I'm not a country music fan.

Limeylizzie October 4, 2011 at 10:28 am

I have met her and she is really nice, not so pretty sans make-up, but a lovely human-being.

usernameguy October 4, 2011 at 3:20 am
Radiodead October 4, 2011 at 7:38 am

Fucking brilliant1

FNMA October 4, 2011 at 9:18 am

I don't know. I think I would have gone with "Dick in Dixie."

DashboardBuddha October 4, 2011 at 9:51 am

I enjoyed that…thanks.

schvitzatura October 4, 2011 at 4:07 am

Jr. would have been good to go if he'd said something about a golf game between Lê Duẩn and Dick Nixon.

slowhansolo October 4, 2011 at 4:08 am

Randall got Monday Night Football. Waylon got Dukes of Hazzard.

You decide.

Barrelhse October 4, 2011 at 9:11 am

Flatt and Scruggs got the Beverly Hillbillies.

crybabyboehner October 4, 2011 at 10:27 am

Daisy Duke or Dan Dierdorff … hmm, tough call there …

Lascauxcaveman October 4, 2011 at 12:11 pm

The Waitresses got Square Pegs.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 12:26 pm

Roger Clyne/The Refreshments got King of the Hill.

PuglyDoRight October 4, 2011 at 5:44 am

Why did the producers of this show that-shall-not-be-named think anyone would care what this loser thinks of the 2012 GOP field? What, Pat Boone wasn't available?

Barrelhse October 4, 2011 at 9:13 am

It has to do with getting him some air-time before he runs for orifice.

Dr_pangloss October 4, 2011 at 5:46 am

OBammer Is Hitler *Belch* Yep… Derp. *Fart* I HEAR he's a Muslin Just LIKE HITLER *Belch* *FART*. Today Tea Party Amercia has found it's new All American Leader.

Rotundo_ October 4, 2011 at 6:19 am

Or at least Tenessee has found a new Senator to represent their contributions to the Confed(oops) United States of America!

Come here a minute October 4, 2011 at 6:02 am

Randall Williams is wearing the same disguise as FLOTUS wears to Target! "Hank Jr.", you can go to Target and nobody will care about your face.

glamourdammerung October 4, 2011 at 6:16 am

I wonder if he was on Fox to make up for its quota of mentally challenged drug addicts since they fired Beck.

RedneckMuslin October 4, 2011 at 6:20 am

Well, if Obama didn't want to be thought of as Hitler he shouldn't wear that stache in his photo at the TB rallies!
(Everytime he does that I have a little more love for der fuhrer).

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 6:23 am

I want to ride in
The car Hank died in.

Barrelhse October 4, 2011 at 9:33 am

I want to ride in Geronimo's Cadillac. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSveqeRha_A

mavenmaven October 4, 2011 at 6:51 am

The scary part is the fox anchors keep joking with him and asking for his "opinion" on things. Should go in the reel along with the teabag crowd booing the gay soldier, etc.

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 7:34 am

I was shocked that they had genuine looks of "oh shit, did he really just say that?" on their faces when he dropped the bomb.

mavenmaven October 4, 2011 at 6:53 am

He's a stinking turd who should have been banned from any decent media after this song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pqaf2wP7hQE&fe...

SenileAgitation October 4, 2011 at 12:11 pm

Maven, my ears! It's a fountain of idiocy. Though I did have to give grudging nod for mention of Wolverton Mountain,

johnnyzhivago October 4, 2011 at 7:03 am

You would hope the dumb fuck would go crawl into a hole, but he'll probably be a hero now. Right here in NJ yesterday I saw a pickup truck (with NJ plates) with a confederate flag attached to the gun rack in the back.

America: 300 million assholes strong!

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 7:37 am

This is a very rare sighting up North, but I have seen a few Northerners (I can count on one hand in fact) with Confederate flags. It's one of the few things that really make me see red. Forget the meaning of the flag, you're living in states that sent men that died to keep your stupid asses in the Union. I hear it's a lot more common to see this shit in Indiana than where I live.

Barb October 4, 2011 at 8:27 am

I can deal with the flag after vomiting. It's the attitude that "hey, the blacks are lucky that we brought them here and gave them Christianity" that pisses me off.

YasserArraFeck October 4, 2011 at 9:58 am

Not common, but not particularly rare here in the Pittsburgh, trapped in the empty quarter between the rust belt and West Virginia. People may live in the 'burbs here, but they're swamp-hopping hillbillies at heart…Hell Yeah!!

SorosBot October 4, 2011 at 10:09 am

It's something I've seen on the rare occasions I've been forced to go into the Pennsylvania hinterlands; and fuck is it scary. I feel like screaming to people, "you do know we were with the good guys in the Civil War, the side that won, right?" It does help explain why my city keeps getting fucked over by the state.

Pres.Libunatic October 4, 2011 at 10:58 am

Pennsyltucky, ftw! If you are a Philadelphian, you're right on. Philly is chronically starved of mass transit money because the 'Tuckians don't want to see the Poors riding around on SEPTA, the result being that Philly has a 70's style mass transit system (with about the same reliability). It was very frustrating when I lived there. I mean, you still have to use tokens unless you have a SEPTA pass.

For some reason Pittsburgh seemed immune to that sort of vaguely racist and classist attitude, maybe because the Burgh is full of Pennsyltuckians itself.

SorosBot October 4, 2011 at 11:14 am

Yep, Philly. And fuck SEPTA still using the tokens when all other mass transit systems switched to card-based fares over a decade and a half ago. They also keep the city starved of state funds, as we pay a lot more tax money than we get from the state, subsidizing those Pennsyltucky assholes who complain about their money going to "those people" in Philly even as the truth is the other way around.

emmelemm October 4, 2011 at 2:13 pm

That sounds like Seattle and the rest of our fair state of Washington.

Pres.Libunatic October 4, 2011 at 10:55 am

There is a large part of NJ which is geographically south of the Mason-Dixon Line if you kept drawing it across the Delaware River. I'm talking Salem County (home of the Cowtown Rodeos), Cumberland County, parts of the southern shore counties, etc. And the Pine Barrens can be a fascinating place at times.

Shit, there are rednecks everywhere. I knew a guy in college who was from the burbiest of NJ suburbs and fancied himself a True Suth'run, complete with the Stars 'n Bars fluttering from his dorm.

An_Outhouse October 4, 2011 at 11:11 am

Upstate NY reporting in: unfortunately confederate flags are popular with the fetal alcohol survivors.

Beowoof October 4, 2011 at 1:49 pm

Yes, get south of Rochester and there they are the dumb bastards driving huge pick up trucks to compensate for small dicks and big ole confederate flags. Driving around wasting gas in the pretend work trucks.

bflrtsplk October 4, 2011 at 7:06 am

Hank Jr. for Preznet (Say it real slow with the thickest deepest Suthen drawl you can manage). I'll drink to that … and drink … and drink … and drink … and drink …

x111e7thst October 4, 2011 at 7:06 am

Hey at least Jr. is still fat and pasty like a real Amerikkkan.

Texan_Bulldog October 4, 2011 at 9:11 am

And Chris Christie.

DashboardBuddha October 4, 2011 at 7:32 am

I bet he still has his open invitation to Niggerhead though.

Doktor Zoom October 4, 2011 at 9:36 am

NOT ONCE DID ANYONE MENTION THAT IT IS THE NAME OF A FLOWER.

–Some genius on Free Republic

DashboardBuddha October 4, 2011 at 9:42 am

I know, right. Flower it may be, but it's a shitty name, it's history of a sorts…and if you name your stupid big hat ranch after something with a shitty name, you're just being a dick.

donner_froh October 4, 2011 at 7:33 am

Fox News amazed that an unregenerate racist asshole would act like one when given a forum.

ESPN shocked that an uncultured boob who they featured for 20 years might be a racist.

We live in astonishing times.

freakishlywrong October 4, 2011 at 9:05 am

If by "astonishing" you mean "completely fucked up and down the rabbit hole", then, agreed.

HELisforHEL October 4, 2011 at 11:21 am

"Uncultured boob" describes the bulk of Football's fan base.

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 7:35 am

America, this is why we can't have nice things.

not that Dewey October 4, 2011 at 7:40 am

FOX PRODUCER: We got the "Gretchen Carlson is hot" joke in 5..4..3….Cue the slide whistle! And… oh. Kilmeade just pooped in his pants. Alright. Somebody get this dumb redneck outta here.

LowProfileinGA October 4, 2011 at 9:09 am

Gretchen Carlson Upskirts: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLOTkrAG0sQ

not that Dewey October 4, 2011 at 9:30 am

ACK!!! What the fuck? Why not just link some coprophagia or crush vids instead?

ManchuCandidate October 4, 2011 at 7:41 am

Being compared to dumbass brain damaged stain of Hank Williams Sr's legacy that's insulting to Apes and Bungholes.

Indiepalin October 4, 2011 at 7:43 am

I'll have what he's having.

Barb October 4, 2011 at 8:28 am

Some sort of redneck nervous breakdown?

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 8:34 am

My guess is that it's equal parts meth, horse tranquilizers, and fat on the brain leading to early-onset dementia, bless is enlarged, cholestoral-ridden heart.

Either that, or simply falling hundreds of feet directly on your face can fuck you up in more ways than one.

Tundra Grifter October 5, 2011 at 10:00 am

IDP: Apparently his son "Hank 3rd," although Randall really isn't "Hank, Jr." thinks his Dad had a wake 'n' bake. He suggested "politics and weed don't mix."

I'm not so sure about that…

outragedcitizen October 4, 2011 at 7:50 am

Seems kinda appropriate that he's wearing what looks like a redneck prison guard uniform. "Shakin' the bush, Boss!"

4TheTurnstiles October 4, 2011 at 7:58 am

Hey now! He's got a clean sense of morals, not like those "hip-hop" degenerates!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7eEp4DHtgM

PuckStopsHere October 4, 2011 at 8:03 am

This is great news for Puck! This could create the opening I've been looking for to get some airplay for a couple MONSTER country tunes I've been working on. To wit: "Come Back When You're Younger" and "It Hurts So Much Since You've Been Gone, It Feels Like You're Still Here." Quality studio time w Gretch is right around the corner! I can feel it. Should I compare NObama to Stalin or Mussolini, tho? Your thoughts, please.

johnnyzhivago October 4, 2011 at 9:00 am

Puck, I hope your songs include a healthy serving of references to your dog and your truck. My suggestion is to change them to "Drive your truck back here when you're younger" and "It Hurts Since You've been Gone (and Bring my Dawg Back you bitch)"
I think you're on target with your interview idea, but to make some headlines you need to include a noose reference in there.

Barrelhse October 4, 2011 at 9:40 am

All good, but I think Jesse James did one called "Come Back When You're Younger, Cole."

alzronnie October 4, 2011 at 8:07 am

The real Hank Williams said that "the best part of him went down my leg."

baconzgood October 4, 2011 at 8:11 am

Hey Mr. Producer on Hank's set. Was this your first day? Couldn't you trip over the cord or somthing? Did we learn a lesson about telling fat washed up dick head country music stars "Just say what you feel and it'll be fine. We're live in 3,2.."

P.S. On a personal note: I don't want to find common ground with you either Hank.

freakishlywrong October 4, 2011 at 8:14 am

Bread, circuses and hate. America 2011.

baconzgood October 4, 2011 at 8:19 am

If we get a new Monday Night Football game I suggest the John Spencer Blues Explosion. NOT EVEN REMOTELY SAFE FOR WORK!!!! BUT FUCKING AWSOME NO LESS!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OM8cUzAAfaI

not that Dewey October 4, 2011 at 8:24 am

Make it fucked up .. fuck shit up
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBJuhxU7oHQ

prommie October 4, 2011 at 10:42 am

I like that. Thank you, sir.

baconzgood October 4, 2011 at 10:48 am

If the lil' lady and I ever decide to get a pre-divorce marrage that's going to be our first song as the hubby and wife dance. (I'm not shitting you)

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 8:20 am

I'm sure Fox might find it in its heart to let him do the opening sequence for their Sunday afternoon NFL games.

V572 Moon! October 4, 2011 at 8:30 am

Wait a minute…did Fox take the chair outside and burn it, or the fart?

Beattitudes October 4, 2011 at 8:36 am

No worries not like he will lose any part of his vast empire, I hear his next gig is singing lead with these guys which is more in line with his rich heritage and vast talents:
http://youtu.be/FQ5ob9B9yD4

Monsieur_Grumpe October 4, 2011 at 8:50 am

What an awful person. I had hoped he would taken after his father and died young.

Monsieur_Grumpe October 4, 2011 at 8:50 am

I loved the statement at the very end from Wretchin that the Bung Hole’s views don’t represent FOX News. I bet Fox gives him his own news show after this interview.

freakishlywrong October 4, 2011 at 9:07 am

I know, right? You couldn't invent a more classic Fux watcher in a lab. (Even a meth one).

johnnyzhivago October 4, 2011 at 8:54 am

Actually, if the "south woulda-won" WE would have had it made, because most of America's dumbasses would be in a different country. Except the CSA probably would have become the Greece of the western hemisphere and we'd be bailing them out right now.

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 9:02 am

Hell, Texas would have eventually broken away from the CSA, and then probably invaded the CSA. Seriously, though, the CSA probably would have lasted for a decade, at best, before it fell into its infighting.

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 10:02 pm

"the CSA probably would have lasted for a decade, at best, before it fell into its infighting."

It wouldn't even have lasted that long. While the Civil War was still going on, Missouri tried and South Carolina at least threatened to secede from the Confederacy:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.ph...

carolinaswamp October 4, 2011 at 10:23 am

You are already bailing us out. South Carolina gets about $1.40 for every $1.00 that we send to Washington in taxes. This accounts for Governor Trikki Nikki's compulsory phone greeting for state employees, "It's a great day in South Carolina!"

Trannysurprise October 4, 2011 at 8:54 am

Chaz Bono looks awful in this interview. Is s/he blind now too?

LowProfileinGA October 4, 2011 at 8:58 am

Ape libel!

freakishlywrong October 4, 2011 at 9:01 am

So far, the best description of greasy Hank there has been Bob Cesca. He describes him as a "character in a Rob Zombie movie". I concur.
http://bobcesca.com/blog-archives/2011/10/wtf-2.h...

Pithaughn October 4, 2011 at 9:11 am

Me and my buds opened for Jr once in Denver. His band played for 15 minutes, he came out and sang 4 songs, and that was it. Serious disappointment. We did get paid though.

Chichikovovich October 4, 2011 at 10:21 am

And the disappointment came because you were hoping for zero songs?

(If Randall just lay in a drunken horse tranquilizer stupor in the back of his luxury RV, they might have just played Hank Sr. songs over the sound system for 3 hours. Better than what you got.)

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 9:15 am

I've been trying to think of who he reminds me of in this appearance, and I've finally figured it out. He looks like a veritable recreation of Weekend at Bernie's. He actually looks like a (barely) reanimated corpse, some taxidermy experiment gone horribly wrong, a Southern Frankenstein's monster, of sorts. You know, like something you put up in your farmfield to scare birds and small children away.

GunToting[Redacted] October 4, 2011 at 9:36 am

Well, Halloween is coming.

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 9:23 am

Yeah, the title of this post actually makes note that he was fired.

Monsieur_Grumpe October 4, 2011 at 9:28 am

Doh!
I watched this video yesterday so of course I didn't need to read anything before commenting.
Oh the shame.

John Birf Society October 4, 2011 at 9:36 am

Are you ready for the invisible hand of the market?

weejee October 4, 2011 at 9:36 am

As has been pointed out, talent-wise this nut fell far from the tree. This might get me to take a look at Monday Nite feetzball. Nah, that would require getting cable, and Mrs. weejee and I would prefer to spend that extra $5/day at the neighborhood small shops than give $150/mo to Comcast.

KeepFnThatChicken October 4, 2011 at 9:40 am

The worst part? His fans will now embrace him even further.

He didn't have to make a salient point, or prove anything, or show his hand. All he had to do was speak his mind, and he'll now be even more endeared to the rednecks.

Monsieur_Grumpe October 4, 2011 at 9:44 am
FakaktaSouth October 4, 2011 at 9:49 am

Hey fucktard, how bout not talking about our President while wearing that God Damned Camo Alabama hat. That's bad for recruiting. Coach Saban says fuck off. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

elviouslyqueer October 4, 2011 at 10:17 am

What's even more amazing to me is that he's a Tide fan. I thought all rednecks naturally migrated to Auburn.

FakaktaSouth October 4, 2011 at 10:47 am

You just made my whole day.

prommie October 4, 2011 at 10:36 am

I'm not saying nothing. You told me I got to be sweet.

prommie October 4, 2011 at 10:44 am

Hey, I think you may have just created a new term, henceforth, I will never call it just plain "camo," from now on, it will always and only be "God Damned Camo." Capital letters and all.

FakaktaSouth October 4, 2011 at 10:55 am

God Damned Camo forever. Thanks for being sweet in spite of what I am sure is better judgment.

The boring "we're not all bad thing" in my defense:
I live in a 30% African American county (and now zero hispanics, like even ones born here I think) that went 48% Obama and our mayor is so progressive he has been touted on the national stage for higher positions in the D-partay. Everyone here, including stupid republicans LOOOOOVE and seriously support him so much he ran unopposed last election. Also, football is fun.

prommie October 4, 2011 at 11:02 am

I miss SEC football. I went to a Penn State game 2 weeks ago (Weekend at JoePa's) and the stadium was only half full, and they play stupid beer commercial music real loud on the PA between plays, what the holy fuck is that shit about? I wanted to hear the bands and chants and all thst stuff. However, Temple has a dance squad that dances like the Fly Girls, and they are barefoot, they go barefoot, all of them, and there is nothing dirtier than a barefoot girl swinging her hips around.

FakaktaSouth October 4, 2011 at 11:14 am

Half empty? That makes me mad. The only reason that we didn't get to go to the PennSt/Bama game was the lack of available tickets. Do they sell beer there? That. Sucks. (LSU went to West Virginia and got to drink beer. The WVU concessions reported that beer sales for that game equalled the consumption of all the beer consumed at the three games prior to their arrival. Again, fun!)And, I have seen those barefoot Temple girls. That is a great answer to the white platform go-go boots the basically nekkid girls here have worn here since the invention of go-go-ing…

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 9:50 am

I actively dislike country music — not as intensely as I dislike football, but still pretty vehemently — but even I know that Hank Williams Jr. is *by far* the worst of all the Hank Williamses; Hank Williams Sr. being by far the best, Hank Williams III acquitting himself decently well in second place, and Hank Williams Jr. trailing disgracefully last.

KeepFnThatChicken October 4, 2011 at 10:20 am

I actively ignore country music — as played on the radio. Give me Marty Robbins, Buck Owens, Dwight Yoakam, Waylon Jennings and Brad Paisley.

To acknowledge any of those Williams coonasses just encourages them.

Chichikovovich October 4, 2011 at 10:27 am

Not just the Hank Williamses: he's worse than Hank Snow, he's worse than Junior Kimbrough, and he isn't fit to change the oil filter in Lucinda Williams' Corvette.

[Note: I have no hard information indicating that Lucinda Williams has a Corvette.]
[Note 2: But of course she does.]

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 10:22 pm

"I have no hard information indicating that Lucinda Williams has a Corvette"

The only Lucinda Williams song I know is the one about how it's over, but she can't let go, but I figure her for a Camaro kinda gal.

4TheTurnstiles October 4, 2011 at 10:59 am

Ironically, his daughter Holly (Hank III's sister I mean) is a very capable songwriter and has quite a voice. Talent skips a generation.

Toomush_Infer October 4, 2011 at 9:51 am

Pretty sure the story is the vetting process for informercialpolitiganda at FAUX – who decided it would be ok to let this drunken asshat on the show?… and where is that vetter now?…

starfanglednut October 4, 2011 at 9:51 am

I have a great affection for Hank Sr. I don't really watch TV so excuse my ignorance, but who the hell is this greasy, rotund, hateful, stupid, and, judging from the links, absolutely abominable musician? And why is he being interviewed by anyone, anywhere?

DashboardBuddha October 4, 2011 at 9:54 am

OT: Dear Lord…thou knows I leave for Texas in 4 days. Please help me keep my mouth shut as I encounter Big Hat Dumbassery.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 9:59 am

Buddha—voice of experience here, just nod and smile and ask for another Shiner Bock.

DashboardBuddha October 4, 2011 at 10:09 am

Is that a good beer? I see a lot of them in my future, I think.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 10:26 am

Well, it's a big Flagass Fave. Drink it out of the longnecks; lots of beer distributors/bars are lazy about cleaning out their pipes and on draft can be a bit of a gamble. What town are you headed to?

DashboardBuddha October 4, 2011 at 10:42 am

Dallas/Ft. Worth area. Hey…it just dawned on me, if there are some wonketeers that live there abouts, I won't have much time, but I'd really dig meeting some of you.

HELisforHEL October 4, 2011 at 11:30 am

To me one of the best things in Texas. That, Gruene Hall and Austin. And San Antonio is pretty, but I hear it's overrun with redneck goons these days?

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 12:09 pm

30% white, 60% hispanic, 10% Af-Am or other. The rednecks don't make much of a dent here, which is why it's pretty nice.

HistoriCat October 4, 2011 at 11:49 am

I second BTF on the Shiner. Hope your trip turns out OK – I'm not a big fan of the DFW area but I'm sure pockets of it are tolerable.

Barrelhse October 4, 2011 at 9:58 am

So the GOP is bringing out the "intellectual heavies" of the right-wing. This should finally raise the quality of political discourse to a meaningful, thought-provoking, issues-oriented level.

Thanks, FOX, for helping to make this ugly country what it is.
Today Wall St., tomorrow FOX "News."

smitallica October 4, 2011 at 9:59 am

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME BRANSON DINNER THEATER??

Tundra Grifter October 4, 2011 at 10:00 am

Apparently Ted Nugent wasn't available. Or Chuck Norris. Or Jon Voight. Or any other C-List "entertainer."

Cat_Damon October 4, 2011 at 10:04 am

"Williams, from Tennessee, has said he would run as a Republican for the U.S. Senate in 2012." – ESPN.
http://espn.go.com/espn/story/_/id/7056003/espn-p...

Indiepalin October 4, 2011 at 10:09 am

Hitler's not ready to make nice.

CHUDster_Arthur October 4, 2011 at 10:11 am

This is similar to when CS Lewis Jr. wrote that song about blowing up the moon:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjsW_B4eZTc

not that Dewey October 4, 2011 at 10:14 am

um, "Electric Teeth"??

Surely you mean Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem?

pfft. kids today.

MrFizzy October 4, 2011 at 10:15 am

Bocephus is ancient Greek for greasy phallus. Dude is in serious need of a bath.

elviouslyqueer October 4, 2011 at 10:16 am

I actually enjoyed that clip, as I haven't seen that much collective pants shitting in, oh, ever. Well played, fugly redneck. Well played.

El Pinche October 4, 2011 at 10:19 am

Hank Jr. is wrong, but he's entitled to his opinion. Dubya was Hitler. That's mine.

Side note: In East Texas, there's an inbred division of the KKK which uses Hank Jr.'s visage as their mascot. They have his ugly ass mug on their sheets and white pickup trucks. HENCEFORTH, Hanky is the face of the KKK.

emmelemm October 4, 2011 at 2:22 pm

Is that like Mr. Hankey, the Christmas poo? Cuz this guy looks like a big pile of poo.

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 11:17 pm

"Dubya was Hitler."

Nah. Hitler actually got a majority of the vote.

Negropolis October 4, 2011 at 11:41 pm

The KKK was shamed into dissolution up here in Michigan a decade or two, ago. The only thing that effectively happened, however, is that they simply formed skinhead groups.

KeepFnThatChicken October 4, 2011 at 10:21 am

So NOW is it okay for us to listen to the Dixie Chicks?

crybabyboehner October 4, 2011 at 10:22 am

This is just a publicity stunt for his new record with David Allen Coe.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 10:27 am

I didn't watch, did Hank give his views on the Occupy Wall Street movement?

Chichikovovich October 4, 2011 at 10:39 am

After they cut to commercial, Randall continued: "I mean, it would be like Ollie North giving cakes to the Ayatollahs, or Reagan selling Arms to Iran, or Rumsfeld shaking hands with Saddam Hussein and selling him WMD's or Bush giving a big ol' smooch to king of the country where almost all the 9-11 hijackers came from, or….Why are you making those faces and waving your hands like that?"

Guppy06 October 4, 2011 at 10:44 am

It's like Adolf Hitler and Benjamin Netanyahu playing golf, talking about nationalist agendas like pushing out the inferior races and getting some living space.

… wait, what?

MiniMencken October 4, 2011 at 4:09 pm

Wish I could upfist more than once for this comment, you naughty little fish.

Chichikovovich October 4, 2011 at 10:59 am

I remember when the Dixie Chicks were critical of Bush (nothing like comparing him to Hitler, just saying they were ashamed to share a home state with him) and there was a huge hullaballoo about "criticizing the Commander in chief" (sometimes adding:) "while our troops are putting their lives at risk overseas".

Remember this open letter from a navy officer – the word "president" occurs only once, the phrase "commander in chief" three times. ("Bush" not at all. And "Chimpy" is right out.) http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/dixiechick...

And then there was the Diane Sawyer interview on ABC with these gems:

“If you do support the troops, should you be attacking their Commander-In-Chief?”
and
“But even people who said it’s fine to question the war, were shocked that someone would stand on stage and attack the Commander In Chief.”

Do a Google search on "Dixie Chicks" and "Commander in Chief" – thousands of hits.

But somehow, since around January 2009 I don't hear "Commander in Chief" anymore. And we still have troops putting their lives in jeopardy in Afghanistan and Iraq. I wonder why that is? I suppose it must be that Diane Sawyer, that Navy aviator guy, and Fox news just aren't very patriotic anymore, and don't support the troops.

elviouslyqueer October 4, 2011 at 11:45 am

Silly Chichi, that whole "patriotism" thing only applies when the president/CiC isn't a Half-bred Kenyan Muslim Manchurian Candidate Nigger™.

NorthStarSpanx October 4, 2011 at 11:00 am

Hank Jr:don't retreat…reload! (Steps aside bc his 1st Amend.rights ceased 2exist thx 2activists trying 2silence"isn't American,not fair")
less than a minute ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®
Sarah Palin
SarahPalinUSA

Hank Jr.=even more powerful & effective w/out the shackles, so watch out Constitutional obstructionists. And b thankful 4 his voice,America!
less than 2 minutes ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®
Sarah Palin
SarahPalinUSA

Hank Jr.=popped in your 8track & rocking 2 u as blez'd American. Guzzling Diet Dr. Pepper & my nice big SUV guzzles good clean energy! Free Speech, got to celebrate it!
less than 3 minutes ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®
Sarah Palin
SarahPalinUSA

KeepFnThatChicken October 4, 2011 at 12:23 pm

T (rash)

Weenus299 October 4, 2011 at 11:03 am

We found a reason Hank Sr. started drinking, and ultimately left us all too soon.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 11:15 am

I thought that equating Obama with Hitler was part of the whole Fox raison d'être. Shouldn't Hank get a break, since what he said was nothing more than anyone who goes on that network is expected to say?

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 11:22 pm

Yeah, but not so overtly that you could actually, you know, be held accountable. You can call Obama a Muslin Socialist Communist African Nazi, but if you don't say it in an *encrypted* way, there goes your plausible deniability up shit's creek.

stew1 October 4, 2011 at 11:44 am

Ah, go fuck your fat cousin!

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 11:20 pm

Why? Are all his sisters out of town?

ttommyunger October 4, 2011 at 11:48 am

"…Randall Williams is a dumb turd." . Really, Wonkettet, Jr. (if that is your real name)? I would like to inform you that I, myself, and several of my friends and acquaintances have been identified with that description on many occasions just for the simple fact that we continue to live in Georgia. Although I make no unusual claim to above-average intelligence or hygiene, I totally reject your comparison to this knuckle-dragging buffoon. This moron obviously eats with his feet, shits in his bed and flings his feces in all directions without rhyme or reason. The very idea that he might one day rise to the level of a "Dumb Turd" is offensive and hurtful to Dumb Turds everywhere. Accordingly I and my friends have determined to file suit for Libel and in furtherance of this goal have retained the services of Dewey, Phuckem and Howe for that purpose. This will not stand!

drawingporno October 4, 2011 at 7:56 pm

I find myself intrigued by the proposition being put forth here that there exists certain occasions wherein the flinging of feces in all directions does indeed comport with some measurable understanding of rhyme and reason…It's just good to know that if I ever find myself somehow caught in a literal shit storm that there might be a perfectly rational, logical and (at least to the person(s) responsible for the airborne fecal material) justification behind it.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 12:06 pm

Nice summation.

Your move, Lester Bangs.

KeepFnThatChicken October 4, 2011 at 12:20 pm

It would seem there were tremors during Chubby Checker, and a full-scale pall when Stryper emerged. But, like L.A., you get used to the shaking.

beavis420 October 4, 2011 at 12:31 pm

Jesus Christ

How did they think that his freak face and obscured eyes was a good thing to put on TV

Schmannnity October 4, 2011 at 12:44 pm

Doocy's face at 1:35 says: "that's too fucking stupid for even this show."

Gleem_McShineys October 4, 2011 at 2:13 pm

Steve Doocy is able to recognize something as being "too stupid"? This has to be some kind of divides-by-zero paradox. When does the wormhole open up?

James Michael Curley October 4, 2011 at 1:23 pm

I've been getting warnings from my virus software, McAfee, that it 'blocked content from suspicious sites' when Wonkette puts up a FauxNews video. Anybody else?

tessiee October 4, 2011 at 11:24 pm

Me too, also too.

James Michael Curley October 5, 2011 at 7:15 am

Nice to know that Mc Afee has better taste then most Republican in its choice of viewing material.

Beowoof October 4, 2011 at 1:34 pm

And the irony is to watch black guys excel in professional athletics.

thefrontpage October 4, 2011 at 2:58 pm

Randall Williams and Ted Nugent are secretive homosexual lovers, and the consistently caffeinated psychoness that spews from their mouths like volcano lava is simply psychological over-compensation for their shame in simply knowing other men in the Biblical sense.

Or they're just dumb hillbilly rednecks.

Troglodeity October 4, 2011 at 3:47 pm

I will play Devil's Advocate here. Williams wasn't actually making a direct comparison of Obama to Hitler. He merely said that Obama and Boehner talking made as much sense as Hitler and Netanyahu talking. So you might just as well say he compared Boehner to Hitler. Which I think we can all agree would be perfectly reasonable.

BaldarTFlagass October 4, 2011 at 10:50 am

I believe there are some here, but I ain't one of 'em. Maybe some DFW denizens can recommend a good bar; if not, there is a Texas chain that's pretty good called Sherlock's/Baker Street; English pub theme, very cheap drinks (at least at the San Antonio branch), there are several in the DFW area. http://www.sherlockspubco.com/index.html Have fun!

DashboardBuddha October 4, 2011 at 11:02 am

Great tip…I'm a SH fan.

prommie October 4, 2011 at 11:24 am

I wish I could post the picture of my son and I posing with the temple cheerleaders. The game was in Philadelphia, which explains the attendance, Penn State home games are always full. I am not a fan of Penn State, unless they are beating Notre Dame, which I hate almost as much as FSU and Georgia and Mississippi and LSU and above all, Auburn. I am still kicking around the idea of making an effort to get to a game this year, a real game, a Florida game, somewhere, any fucking where. I haven't been to a game in over 20 years.

Beowoof October 4, 2011 at 1:47 pm

Always here the locals here in Western NY say that we support all that welfare in NYC, when the opposite is true, the taxpayers in NYC support their dumb asses upstate. As with most teatards, never let facts get in the way of their dumb opinion.

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