correcting the facts

New York Times Quickly Learns Cops Are Right, Protests Wrong

Twenty minutes is how many Friedmans?Shameful upper-crust real-estate brochure the New York Times is finally sort of covering the famous Occupy Wall Street protests now in their third week. We don’t care, because why is anyone waiting for some old newspaper to publish the news that everybody is making without the permission of the New York Times, right? But still, it’s funny how the first version of the NYT story about the Brooklyn Bridge fuckery by the NYPD was very quickly edited into a “tense showdown” that completely left out the part about the New York cops leading the protesters onto the bridge and into some weird Spiderman orange net trap, on purpose.

Honestly, complaining about the Corporate Media not reporting on the things you already know about is a waste of time. Corporate Media never reports on anything until they’re told about this thing by enough sources of Conventional Wisdom such as other media representatives, lobbyists, Senate staffers, the boss, and probably what they read on Slate or whatever. (None of this applies if the turmoil is happening in a safely foreign country, because then the editors can use dramatic photographs of foreigners holding up their left feet, painted green, because that’s how they “show democracy” over there, and then the newspaper can win Awards from other newspaper people. It’s magic.)

Anyway, the New York Times very rapidly changed this story written in a “factual way” to better reflect the NYT mission of ignoring whatever happens in New York until it’s big enough to be lied about, the end. [SOA Watch]

About the author

A writer and editor of this website from 2006 to early 2012, Ken Layne is occassionally seen on Twitter and writes small books and is already haunting you from beyond (your) grave.

View all articles by Ken Layne

Comments

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  • GunToting[Redacted]

    Your "Liberal Media" in action.

    • Sue4466

      Liberal media inaction.

      There, fixed.

  • http://whatthefuckhasgopdonesofar.com/ Ayn Rand Paul Tard

    GODDAMN LIBRUL BIAS!!!1!

    On a side note, I saw Bloomberg News referred to as left-wing regarding the Koch Bros story.

    • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

      Well it is, if you're comparing it to BigJournalism or some other Breitfart creation.
      ~

    • freakishlywrong

      "Left wing" now means "somewhat factual".

      • Lascauxcaveman

        Reality has a left-wing bias.

        • Ansnarkist

          A well-known one at that.

  • hagajim

    All the news that's fit to print, three weeks out of date and wrong…nice work NYT!

    • Sue4466

      When they say "fit" they mean "fit the narrative of whatever our overlords tell us"

    • PalinzADummy

      Not "wrong." Deliberately doctored.

  • Steverino247

    Goddamned Al Baker in Action is what it is. Who is this guy?

    • OneYieldRegular

      Probably the "Alan Smithee" of the newspaper business. No one will claim credit.

    • Come here a minute

      Colin Monynihan's minder.

    • user-of-owls

      I pinned the rap on him yesterday. So I am superior to you in any and all ways.

      • Steverino247

        That's OK. I'm reporting you to the ASPCA for "using" owls, so nahner, nahner, nahner.

        • user-of-owls

          Ah, go suck a vegetable.

          • PalinzADummy

            Kortney? Is that you?

  • freakishlywrong

    I guess all our "media" are waiting around for Lou Sarah to weigh in. For fucks sake.

  • MittsHairHelmet

    Thomas Jefferson said "Where the press is free, and every man able to read, all is safe."

    0 for 2.

    • Radiodead

      He also liked slaves, huge parcels of doled out land and dark meat.

      • MittsHairHelmet

        2 for 3.

  • OkieDokieDog

    Well no wonder it changed. Al Qaeda wrote that 2nd article.

    oh. oops. Al Baker.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Did the cops use those "people scooper" trash trucks like in Soylent Green? It's always interesting when life imitates art.

    • http://wonkette.com/ Monsieur_Grumpe

      Next they'll break out giant mouse traps filled with brownies or Snapple.

  • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

    Libtarded libruls lying again.

  • EatsBabyDingos

    I believe the New York Timmeh!

  • ProgressiveInga

    But when are the Occupy Wall Street protesters going to apologize to the NYPD?

    • fletc3her

      Right after Obama apologizes to W for being wrong about how fun it is to kill people with predator drones.

  • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

    Shameless whores the NYT, the ones who kept a lid on the Bush Administration spying on everyone story until after the 2004 election?

    Shocked, I iz!
    ~

    • SorosBot

      And who gave us all the breaking stories about how the Bush administration is totally right, Saddam Hussein must have WMD and ties to Al Qaeda so we totally need to conquer Iraq.

      • PalinzADummy

        Ah yes, that dreadful little bitch … what was her name? Judith Miller? Palling around with Scooter Libby and David Addington, two well-known turrrrrrrrists.

  • spinozasgod

    I read that the NTY reporter who was arrested said that the protesters in the front led the group off of the walkway and onto the street chanting "the bridge is ours", and that is why they were arrested.

  • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

    this casts further doubt on all the marriage announcements i like to mock.

    • http://wonkette.com Ken Layne

      Greatest picture of the protests so far: http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/10/02/article

      • BaldarTFlagass

        Which of those lucky bastards caught the garter?

      • elviouslyqueer

        Lamest. Lesbian. Wedding. EVER.

      • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

        awesome. the guy in the tuxedo-T is straddling the dichotomy.

        • BaldarTFlagass

          That dude is a time traveler from the 1890s (or 1970s). Giveaway is the sideburns.

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            I believe those were all the rage amongst Brooklyn's hipsters last week. To be fair, the guy's been on the other side of the East River for several days.

      • http://Wonkette.com ProudLibunatic

        OMG, (and I never say things like this), what a FUGLY bride!!!

  • http://www.youtube.com/user/FlipOffResearch FlipOffResearch

    All the news that fits (our narrative) to print.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    This Brooklyn Bridge, does it lead to Eastasia or does it lead to Oceania?

    • AJWjr.

      Nowhere.

    • Chichikovovich

      Eastasia. It has always led to Eastasia.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      East Williamsburg, and Ocean Hill. Close enough.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

      Worse it leads to Flatbushia, a land where nobody wants to go.

    • Negropolis

      Eurasia; the Brooklyn Bridge has always led to Eurasia…

  • chascates

    The power of the press belongs to those who own it.

  • baconzgood

    "The Great Grey Lady is a great paper"

    "The Great Grey Lady is propaganda arm of the top 1%"

    FIXED

  • slithytoves

    I get all my news from the local town crier who also does double duty as the stoned clerk working at the requisite Indian Expressmart on the corner.

    • DaRooster

      Does he go around shooting off his guns and screaming about "Someone is coming!"?

  • LesBontemps

    Hahahaha, remember when the NYT was a champion of giving voice to the people and exposing government fucktardery?

    Yeah, me neither.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Pres.Libunatic

      They fucked the chicken on Watergate and haven't looked back since.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        They fucked the chicken on Watergate the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire and haven't looked back since.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    That fucker J. Jonah Jameson is a corporate fascist tool.

    • GhostBuggy

      'Occupy Wall Street' Protestors: Threat or Menace?

    • metamarcisf

      Parker! You're fired!

    • bagofmice

      Cave Johnson here, to tell you about the latest investment opportunities in Aperture Science.

      • Tommmcattt

        Still alive!

    • http://www.gurukalehuru.wordpress.com gurukalehuru

      Perry White was not much better.

  • GeorgiaBurning

    The revolution will not be televised, so obviously it's not worth much discourse in the Times.

  • gullywompr

    Nice newspaper you got there… We at NYPD would hate to see anything happen to it…

    • OneYieldRegular

      It's as though they received a phone call from Bernie Kerik.

      • PalinzADummy

        Chances are, they did~! Or is he still in prison?

  • RedneckMuslin

    You know who else changed their newspaper stories when their police force used Gestapo tactics?

    • Indiepalin

      The Onion?

    • ProgressiveInga

      Rupert Murdoch?

    • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

      The Daily Planet?

    • BaldarTFlagass

      My money's on the Frankfurter Zeitung

    • http://www.wonkette.com Pres.Libunatic

      Gail Wynand?

    • elviouslyqueer

      Peggy Noonan?

    • Radiodead

      Johannes Gutenberg?

    • Chichikovovich

      Der Stürmer?

    • PalinzADummy

      All of them, RedneckMuslin?

  • baconzgood

    Now to be fair to the NYPD they had to bust all those people before they crossed the bridge. They need to keep all that kinda trash out of Brooklyn.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Last_Exit_to_Brookly

  • Callyson

    And I can't wait to hear the excuses from the Public Editor (or whatever they call their ombudsperson) on this one…that is, if they deign to pay any attention to this screw – up in the first place…

  • freakishlywrong

    We all know the bigger story is whether or not New Jersey Fat Jesus is running or not. Corporate media want a Republican to win, so they can go back to even lazier reporting and still collect those big salaries.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      Perhaps it is merely like the incessant coverage of Rex Ryan, the Jets and the "New York Football Giants" on ESPN. You make more money covering that market than taking 20 tons of equipment to Green Bay.

      • Radiodead

        Or maybe they just like to cover fat fucks because they are slow moving targets.

  • Goonemeritus

    If your prostate is only walnut sized you are not in their target demographic.

    • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

      Or not part of the horsey set.

  • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    The Gray Senile Old Lady should have gone with "It's a Trap"*

    *sorry, if it has been beaten to death.

  • RedneckMuslin

    This changes the old adage "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it".

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      NYPD: "Psst. Wanna buy a bridge?"
      Stoned protesters: "Oooh, yeah!"

  • Indiepalin

    Judith Miller is slowly turning over in her grave.

    • LesBontemps

      If only!

    • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

      Career grave.

  • Radiodead

    I'm still hoping the Karma Police arrest these minds.

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      They would, but they keep getting abstracted.

      • not that Dewey

        Whew! For a second there, I lost myself.

    • GunToting[Redacted]

      What about the Dream Police?

    • bagofmice

      It's the hairdo, innit?

    • AlterNewt

      "Karma Police" just seems…problematic, somehow.

  • Generation[redacted]

    More importantly, what do the officer.com forums have to say about this?

  • PuckStopsHere

    Could somebody check this for me? Does The Times have the Yankees up 2-0 in the ALDS?

    • Chichikovovich

      Man, I wish I could have seen that unbelievable comeback in the ninth inning, when Cano hit the three-run homer off Valverde. Al Baker's writing really makes it come to life.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Almost as good as his description of Carl Crawford's redeeming, game-saving (season-saving!) catch. It was sheer poetry, how he risked getting grass stains on his unform by diving for that sinking line drive, proving that he was worth all the money Boston was paying him.

  • prommie

    Well, thats depressing, Ken Layne, the Debbie Downer of Wonkette, and I had a case of the Mondays going on anyway. Is there no ass-fucking to report? Surely, somewhere, someone is ass-fucking. Ass-fucking is both funny, and salacious, and the only thing better than just regular sex is funny sex. KBJ, Ken, can't you find an "uplifting" story, something warm and moist, perhaps even? Something with naked people sexing in some amusing way? Fuck it, just post a link to the youtube of the donkey trying to fuck that mexican guy who was taking a dump in a field, thats funny as hell.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Careful, or you might get a "Go fuck yourself." Which, in and of itself, would be kind of funny.

      • prommie

        You kidding? Otis is my man, he loves me, he knows I'm kidding.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Oh prommie, cheer up. Ken did manage to post a pic of Ann Coulter and Chaz Bono's Big Fake Dyke Wedding, so there is that.

      • prommie

        We will always have that, yes.

    • http://wonkette.com Ken Layne

      All the GOP candidates are in hiding, apparently, so we will just have to smoke them out of their (glory) holes.

      • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

        All the GOP candidates are in hiding, apparently

        Has anyone checked in or under John Bolton's mustache?

        • GunToting[Redacted]

          Grumpy Ned Flanders is grumpy.

      • prommie

        Where's Fatty McFattypants? That poor bastard would hit the wall while his dick was still 3 feet away from the glory hole; I bet he hasn't seen his dick in years, not without a mirror on a stick, anyway.

        • Negropolis

          "I warsh myself with a rag-on-a-stick."

  • proudgrampa

    Didn't we cover this sad story already?

  • OneYieldRegular

    Meh. Who pays attention to the NYT? I get all my news from Riley Waggaman.

    • LesBontemps

      Wishing you many many upfists.

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    I will never eat at the New York Times again!

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      You're killing me.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    The Ochs-Sulzberger family newsletter has two bedrock principles that it will never betray– stable bond prices and rising Manhattan real estate values.

  • http://wonkette.com/ weejee

    The grating gray lady, da Times, is circling the drain only a little more slowly than the WaPoop. We're dealing with the business, political, and journalistic acumen of Pinch Sulzberger here, not the Pulitzer promenade of yore.

  • http://eldonaldo.com el_donaldo

    You can't blame them for deciding to simply reprint a NYPD press release when they finally got it. They need the time and space to print more "rich people are suffering too" articles, or reviews of $300,000 Bentleys – http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/02/automobiles/aut

    • Nostrildamus

      I named my dick "Bentley" (and not because it costs $300K to jump on board).

    • elviouslyqueer

      The Bentley manages to look richly imposing, yet tasteful, avoiding the chromed-Panzer strut of the Rolls-Royce Phantom and the soulless-limo look of the Mercedes Maybach. Crisply tailored shoulders and flowing haunches evoke Bentley S-Types of the ’50s.

      Wow, Lawrence Ulrich, fap to "Europa Europa" much?

      • tessiee

        "The Bentley manages to look richly imposing, yet tasteful"

        Interestingly enough, the quote you post here describes both the car Bentley and the Nostrildamus' schlong Bentley.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      For a real fun read, try Friedman's latest offering.
      You have to ask, "Tom, did you read this fucking thing, after you wrote it?"

      • PalinzADummy

        Good gawd, what is that worthless billionaire babbling about now? Does anyone even read his shit anymore? Sweet,, suffering Christ.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Sorry, but I just can't hate on a car that weighs three tons and still reaches 184 miles per hour.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        With hardly a ripple on the surface of your champagne.
        No report on how many gallons per mile it gets while doing this, however.

  • Indiepalin

    "I get all the news I need from the weather report" – former Senator Paul Simon (D) (IL)

    • http://eldonaldo.com el_donaldo

      That might explain his taste in fashion.

    • tessiee

      Apparently, he gets all the music he needs from ripping off African music…
      Oh, wait, that was the other Paul Simon.
      My bad.

  • littlebigdaddy

    What does MoDo have to say about this?

    • prommie

      She's still sulking because noone has publicly compared her to Dorothy Parker yet. Poor thing, she's deluded; Dorothy Parker was witty.

      • LesBontemps

        She's still sulking because noone has publicly compared her to Dorothy Parker yet.

        "Maureen, you're no Dorothy Parker."

        There, now that's taken care of.

      • Guppy06

        Every day, she is her own fresh hell.

    • Negropolis

      Probably about emasculating about how Obama's a pussy or something.

  • metamarcisf

    Headline of the day (Yahoo):

    Cheney says Obama should apologize to Bush administration after al-Awlaki killing

    • James Michael Curley

      What does that even mean?

      • HistoriCat

        I'll translate for you :
        "I'm still a liar and a world-class asshole."

        Seriously Dick – you're still alive? How much longer am I going to have to hold it? I really gotta pee and I just know there will be a line when I get to the grave.

        • tessiee

          I call dibs on the beer concession!

      • tessiee

        "What does that even mean?"

        I'm not sure, but I think it means that Cheney thinks Obama should apologize to Bush for a) being black and/or b) winning the Presidential election by enough of a margin so that the Repukes couldn't steal it yet again.

    • PalinzADummy

      I'm afraid to say anything in case my blood pressure pops my carotid out.

  • poncho_pilot

    if i didn't occasionally see someone using one as a blanket, i would think there weren't any newspapers left.

    • PalinzADummy

      I don't mind if there are any left. But why this godawful piece of birdcage liner?

      • poncho_pilot

        devoted readers? i worked at a convenience store (in Wisconsin for reference i guess) and we had several customers who were adamant that we save them copies every day. they'd call the store to make sure. we only received between 4-10 Times a day and they sold out most days. but even with those sales multiplied across the country by whatever number is accurate, i can't see how they stay in business.

        so my answer is: it takes all kinds? yeah…

  • SorosBot

    Just imagine if the current editors of the Times and Post were around in the 60s and 70s; Nixon would never have had to worry about the Pentagon Papers or Watergate, because the newspapers would have just refused to publish / investigate them.

    • PsycWench

      And everyone would know of our victory in the Vietnam War.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        You mean Vietnam, America's 51st state?

      • PalinzADummy

        This is particularly painful to me, as a VN vet I know lost his life earlier this year. The VA refused to give him 100% disability, despite the fact that he lost his leg, two fingers, and an eye, rescuing his buddies from certain death. To his credit, he had a great sense of humour, and when MacNamara died, he burnt his prosthetic leg and dumped its ashes at the wall, together with a copy of MacNamara's book that he first shot full of holes. God rest ya, Lou.

  • Radiodead

    Cover story in a near future NYT Sunday Magazine: Is Print Journalism Dead?

    • LesBontemps

      Follow-up story: A Big Truck Or A Series Of Tubes?

    • http://Wonkette.com ProudLibunatic

      This little post makes me feel so much better about the NYT's impending demise.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    I'm sure this is all happening just the way George Washington Roebling envisioned it.

    • http://www.wonkette.com/ slowhansolo

      Kudos for the engineering geek reference! I only caught it because I read the McCullough book.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        Watched the Ken Burns special about the bridge on Netflix Streaming a couple months ago.

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    Stupid paper doesn't even have Horoscopes or Ziggy.

  • prommie

    After the way the Times enthusiastically engaged in the psy-ops campaign to gin up public support for the Iraq war, one can't really expect much, can one? I mean, Pravda was a joke, too.

    • Chichikovovich

      Now listen: Pravda had a *great* daily chess column. The New York Times only gives a Sunday column, and Robert Byrne sucks. (I haven't looked for awhile, so maybe it's somebody else doing the chess column. But whoever they may have replaced Byrne with, I'm sure s/he sucks too.)

      • BaldarTFlagass

        Garry Kasparov?

        • Chichikovovich

          Got me. You made me look.

    • LesBontemps

      There is no truth in The News and no news in The Truth.

    • KeepFnThatChicken

      don't get all hopeless to realize that human-run print enterprises are agenda-based. Just remember that once Shatner glorifies Pravda in the recent priceline ad, it gains some respectability.

    • fuflans

      i thought you said 'prada' was a joke and that's not at all funny.

    • PalinzADummy

      In Pravda, is no izvestia; in Izvestia, no pravda.

  • crybabyboehner

    This happened 40 years ago at Mayday, most of the arrests were eventually ruled illegal.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Well you can't expect the NYT to cover this story accurately — they've got all their best reporters covering the daily revelations of spying and skulduggery in the Rupert Murdoch scandal. Oh, wait.

  • Lucidamente1

    Building a bridge to the 18th century.

  • WhatTheHeck

    Can’t even use the NYT for wrapping my fish in anymore as it may taint it on the way home.

    • bagofmice

      Wouldn't want to ruin a perfectly good cloacing. Spellcheck thinks that cloacing isn't a word, but if you look for the space between cloaca and taint, you'll find me there.

  • owhatever

    Another BRILLIANT ploy by the NY Keystone Kops, under the leadership of Chief Barney Fife. Next, they arrest the entire cast of The Book of Mormon. Bad news is that since we're broke, there will be no more police overtime this year.

  • not that Dewey

    Earl Warren said he looked to the sports pages first, because they tell stories of man's accomplishments. The front page only describes man's failures.

    In the case of the New York Times, one can find failures all over the place.

    • prommie

      Then he went and covered-up the coup that killed Kennedy, for the good of the country, doncha know.

      • not that Dewey

        A1, above the fold!

      • http://www.frso.org/index.htm 4TheTurnstiles

        OK, I'll bite. Who did the job? Was L. Fletcher Prouty himself the second gunman on the grassy knoll?

        • SorosBot

          Aliens, I think. Just anything to avoid facing the reality that one crazed gunman actually can succeed in killing the President.

          • prommie

            And that the crazed gunman just coincidentally had just come back from the USSR, to which he had defected after serving in the marines in intelligence with a specialty in Russian. In other words, just the amazing coincidence that the crazed gunman happened to be a CIA agent.

    • PalinzADummy

      Most especially in their offices and on their pages.

      • not that Dewey

        I thought you said in their orifices and on their pages and I thought, "no! I'm talking about the NYT, not Republican congressmen!"

        • PalinzADummy

          This is payback for my "farting" comment, isn't it, ntD? You watch yourself, buddy, or you might be chid yet again. Will user-of-owls take up arms in your defense? Eh? I'm betting not, young man.

          • not that Dewey

            He doesn't have arms. He's an owl.

          • PalinzADummy

            I'm betting he won't be your wingman, either, so there.

  • SorosBot

    This is the same mainstream media that went along with "enhanced interrogation techniques" because calling torture torture would offend the elite. So, no surprise.

  • smitallica

    Dewey Arrests Truman!

  • Corrugated Palin

    To answer the question posed in the image alt text, 20 minutes is 760.5 micro-Friedmans.

    (Yes, I am a nerd.)

  • CHUDster_Arthur
  • Beetagger

    I will withhold judgement until I hear what Peggy Noonan thinks about those rabble-rousers.

  • Quayle2012_KNOT

    Since Ginia Bellafante's NYT article of two weeks ago –a spot on channeling of Paris Hilton with spell check — we only need the littlest Sulzberger to weigh in for us to declare the topic thoroughly covered. He did such a bang up job on the Madison protests.

  • Negropolis

    Parker: I took some amazing photos of Occupy Wall Street.

    J. Jonah Jameson: Parker! I want pictures of SPIDERMAN!

  • http://www.wonkette.com Dr_pangloss

    There never was any other Truth.

  • ttommyunger

    Grey Lady=Dingy worn-out whore. WIN!