It is time to enjoy this fantastic “Rick Perry Rap” performance made by a couple of humans (?) in Austin. And, for once, we really have nothing more to say on the subject.
THE FOURTH HORSEMAN X 2
September 29, 2011
Political Wire
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Authors
Rebecca Schoenkopf (422)
Kirsten Boyd Johnson (927)
Sulagna Misra (4)
Kris E. Benson (11)
Liz Colville (170)
John Schoenkopf (7)
Jim Newell (5640)
Josh Fruhlinger (646)
Erik Jay (27)
Blair Burke (181)
{ 96 comments }
Well there's just no excuse for that.
Perry's candidacy is now officially dead.
It has "jumped the cow."
I'd hit that….with my car.
Don't be fussy, just grab the nearest thang.
"Everybody knows his erection?"
Better tell that Larry Flynt dude…
Heroes of the Alamo, they ain't.
I….uh…
My sentiments exactly.
Did she say something like "voting for Rick Perry, he'll give a straight man an erection"?
That would explain a lot.
Also: those of us residing in the Golden State are quite happy not to have this chick living within our borders…
Clip cut off half way through…. THANK GOD!
Going after the fat white trash vote. Perry's base indeed.
That is a pretty big base…
Racist white trash.
Needs more big girl bouncing.
And more duckface.
"Start campaigning and quit com-paligning"? WTF does that even mean?
I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
I miss Vanilla Ice.
"Ice ice baby…"
Who says white men can't sing the blues? Like, who?!
Jesus. I forced myself to listen to the whole thing.
1. The 1980's called and said "never mind, on second thought you two can keep the 80's fashions."
2. Um, what?
3. As awful as watching that video was, I am making up for the mental damage it caused by imagining the other GOP candidates seeing this bit and laughing their asses off…
Beyonce's choreographer is looking over his shoulder.
I couldn't watch either.
Oh, for fuck's sake.
He's done.
Awesome. Loved it. That spells rap with a capital C.
Worst. Eminem. Video. EVER.
I am upfisting everyone who sat through that entire performance. You are brave, very brave.
I'll take a pass on this video and, alas, your upfist. but I'm not watching that.
5 seconds was all I could take. i forfeit the upfist.
Also, now blind, deaf, and mentally broken.
Alms for the poor fools?
Perry. Perry. 2012. yeah. boy.
Their costumes are wonderful — it looks like James O'Keefe has found his next fake prostitutes.
I was disappointed that it didn't end up with them going back to their dorm room, getting high and having sex with their more attractive roommates.
I was disappointed that it didn't end up with them going back to their dorm room, getting high and having sex with
their more attractive roommateseach other, an assortment of stuffed animals, and at least three sybians./fixed
that's more what real prostitutes look like anyway. Hollywood would have you believe that prostitutes are all attractive. take a drive down El Cajon Blvd in San Diego (or any other similar strip) and Dare To Compare.
The presence of the US Navy's Pacific Fleet has something to do with the unattractiveness of San Diego's hooker army, though I am not sure how.
i have an uncle who was in the navy…i think you're on to something if his tastes in women are any indication.
They kind of remind me of the whores the killers in Fargo hook up with.
"oh! oh! oh, yeah! oh, jeeez!"
White girls can't rap.
Or, apparently, put down the Taco Bell 10-pak…
THESE white girls can't rap. Unless all white boys Wonketteers agree that Rush Limbaugh represents them, I refuse to let these creatures represent me and my kind.
Debbie Harry Libel…
Makes those basketball Dartmouth guys from a couple months back look like the Wu-Tang Clan.
Clicked on the "stop it" tag … man, that is all kinds of awesomeness. Good times.
I thought Rick Perry was trying to stop the rumors that he was gay.
Needs more Lil Jon and less Jimmy John's.
Less Papa John's
less girls who fuck johns in the john. and less johnnycakes.
Glory Hole Libel!
There's just something about this melange of twangy idiots "rapping" over a Casio generated sound track, throwing up gang signs while being photographed badly that makes me my ballsack shrivel up form sexual revulsion while simultaneously puking.
Other than that, it is fine.
I know what you mean. I made it 30 seconds in but hit stop to prevent my balls from retracting in horror.
So, Rick has the stereotypical fat fag hag demographic sewn up. Good to know.
Does Marcus know?
The video was produced by Mike Hunt?
Jeebus. Other than shooting both of them out the end, there is literally nothing they could do with that cannon that would make me ever watch this again.
The cannon is probably supposed to represent Perry's Phallus. The Man-You-Mount Monument.
None of us have nothing further to add to the horrors heaped upon our Country day after day perpetrated by the Right. You have us at your headlines Wonkette.
If you didn't like that, well, you don't have a heart.
Um … that's not quite right. Oh .. got it : If you liked that, well, you don't have a brain.
Fat Booty for Perry
I've found the lead cast members for my new reality show "Texas Dumpster Divas"
I had a hard time understanding it because of all the sophisticated urban hip-hop street Ebonics dialect language thingies.
Word!
Yo!
I'm sad to report this is video is not improved by watching it without sound. If anything, it makes those two spastic heifers even more confusing and unintelligible.
It's not often that I am tempted to use the term "heifer" on any young lady. However, upon perusal of this fine, fine video effort, I daresay both of them deserve that term more than pretty much anyone else I've ever seen.
Austin may not be the capital of live music much longer.
Keep Austin Weird!
It has been years since I suffered though such a total lack of rhythm.
O'Keefe's 'music video' is competitive in this field.
Produced and directed by Navin Johnson. He finally found his "special purpose".
"You don't sweat much, for a fat girl."
They have a serious side too!!! Well done video, except the camera is focused on her face the whole time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljvyaqa5Mfo&fe...
What are her boobs running for again? Love the way she keeps giving sidewise glances at the script.
More boobage below streams of stupidity here.
That one chick sure has nice tits! The other one's not too bad either, but Girl X, does anybody know if her love-pillows are real and natural, or is that the waterbed equivalent of RealBoobs(tm)?
No, no, no, watch this one if you're self-loathing. Even more stoopidity, but lotsa, lotsa cleavage at least. Kappa Gammas, fer shure. But you won't be seeing this pair (OK, these pairs) on Comedy Central any time soon.
THAT'S IT! I'm for no more aid to higher education after watching that. Not that they need to 'work' their way through. Sul Ross University. Has to be.
I was borderline thinking the rap was a parody until I saw this.
Also, boobs.
Um … I didn't hear a word she said.
Nice tits, though. Any Wonketeers close enough to her school to talk her into just whipping those puppies out live on screen?
i wish they all could be california girls.
These are California girls, if you dug the lyrics. In Austin we do not appreciate these mindless LA types.
I sent this to tips@wonkette when it only had 300-something views. But Kos broke it yesterday, so It's not really my fault.
if i were an orc, i would be insulted by this.
Nada! It's rained all around us but none here since last March. The farmer got rid of all the chickens and now we're planting 4 acres of vegetables. I'm covered with dust from plowing and enjoying Newt Gingrich on PBS Newshour. He says this may be the most critical election since 1860!!!
Nothing? Man, that sucks. We've been fortunate enough to have 4 distinct days with rain within the last three weeks. Paradise!
Badonk-baDON'Ts, I'm afraid.
ADD: That picture of Rick at the end is from 1986, right?
Larry Flynt will pay TWO million dollars to anyone who can prove they had sex with either one of these laydeez.
Made it to 0.36.
Now I know what Gordon Liddy's hand felt like hovering over that lighter.
Needs moar glitter and barbarians.
I blame lite beer and corn syrup for this.
A hint to the young ladies: Just because it says "All you can eat buffet," doesn't mean you have to.
California's loss is Texas's loss, too.
Fat, dumb and ugly is no way to go through life.
UH… WHU?
It's not rap music. It's more like…a nursery rhyme. For it to be rap, it'd hafta be on beat. o_O"
If his plan to win the election is that so many people would suffer migraine headaches they wouldn't show up to the polls, I would say he is succeeding. Or is that seceding?
Some needs to give them a vaccination for HPV. Can't have all that sexiness running around!
These Vixens have watched Andy Samberg videos too often. Is it obligatory now to have a scene where, in one hand, you have a huge hero sandwich?
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