wonkette on the streets

Wonkette Interviews the Peaceful Park Dweller Hippie Fiends!

The Park Dwellers: In Their Own Words! Watch this brave anonymous high school teacher (“I hope my principal doesn’t see this”) talk about what’s happening in New York that the National Media (all based in New York) refuses to cover because it’s not Teabaggy enough: “A courageous effort … it opens up a dialog that needs to happen.” Too hopeful for TeeVee! We got a lot of other good stuff on the FlipCam, including famous professor Cornel West! —

“Until now, the police and the courts seem to be conflating consent — that most American of traditions upon which our country is founded — they’re conflating dissent with terror. And they’re kind of doing it automatically.” – Reverend Billy (performance artist), the Church of Earthalujah

“What this is all about is a shift of power from oligarchs to ordinary citizens, and that’s a step-by-step process” – Cornel West

“Violence is really the only thing that will get you a ticket right out of this place” – Justin the Occupier

That’s all for now!

Wonkette’s Riley Waggaman is living amongst the Occupy Wall Street protesters in Lower Manhattan.

About the author

Riley is an "internet blogger." He has written for such internet websites as True/Slant and the terrible Brangelina gossip emporium "The Huffington Post." Riley lives in northeast DC, near H Street. Maybe you do too and want to hang out?

View all articles by Riley Waggaman
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    1. An_Outhouse

      I hear from the wingers that there's great dope all over the place down there. Don't get too stoned to make more vids.

  1. Arken

    Dr. West, I am sure that Princeton, with its excellent medical school, has a terrific dental plan. Please take advantage of said plan, sir.

      1. prommie

        He meant medical coverage. Princeton, of course, lacks said facilities because Princeton, as an institution of higher learning, does not wish to be associated with trade-schools.

          1. sezme

            I think what you are just saying is that you are racist against the gap-toothed.

            Gap toothed civil rights now! Down with orthodonti-fascism!

          2. PalinzADummy

            Jesus, girl, Shane McGowan HAS NO TEETH. Those tiny black stumps just don't qualify.

            Holy hell, I love the Pogues and all, but the first time I saw a picture of him, I like to about died.

        1. Terry

          Princeton, as an institution of higher learning for the children of Princeton grads and people with lots of money,….


          1. prommie

            And Brook Shields. Anyway, you exagerate, they save about half the spots for children of alumni and the wealthy (same thing), and the other half go to asian kids.

      1. Arken

        Yeah, until you have dinner with them and have to sit there staring at that big piece of spinach wedged in the gap. End the gap!

    1. Negropolis

      Well, that was an awfully bitchy and unnecessary thing to say, and I'm not even particularly fond of Dr. West. I've also seen far worse, and yes, even on well-to-do folks, and yes, mostly in the UK if I'm going to be honest.

  2. Pragmatist2

    Wow! This is great!!!
    Now if your Wonkette reporter gets beaten by the police, can we make snarky comments about him?

  3. BaldarTFlagass

    I like the sobriquet "Justin the Occupier." I wish we could go back to names that described our occupations/favorite activities. I would be "Baldar the Too-Much-Drinker."

    Plus, Justin the Occupier has Marie the Antoinette by his side. Can't lose!

  4. skoalrebel

    That's just fuckin' gay. What's the point of a protest if you don't bring plenty of guns, ammo, and a rope for the lynching? Fuckin' hippies need to be shown how we do it in real America. Just remember: there is no freedom without hard liquor and handguns.

    1. El Pinche

      *spit* fuckin A. Don't firgit cold straight dippin Apple-Spice flavered dip…fuck my gay ass gums n teeth.

    1. PalinzADummy

      Jesus fucking J.H. Christ and his Black brother Harry! Srsly. You could die in an explosion and within seconds, your neighbours would be scooping up the bits of your anus and intestines and hawking them on eBay to their fellow ghouls. Stop this fucking country, I want to get off.

      1. DashboardBuddha

        That shit wouldn't be hard to write either.

        So sorry to hear you've lost your job
        But please don't think you're an unemployed slob
        I bet real soon you'll be feeling fine
        When you join your neighbors in the soup kitchen line

        Maybe I should apply for a job?

        1. PalinzADummy

          Oh, hey, wow, sure. I mean, I was just planning to off myself because I'll never find a job that pays a decent wage, but if you're good at this (and you seem to be), go for it!

    2. Negropolis

      I'd so love to get a condescending, faux-sypmathetic card like this when I'm down on my luck…

      Fuck you, Hallmark.

    1. mayor_quimby

      I would looooove to see some tea party anti-protesters show up on Wall St. with their AR-15 rifles and Colt revolvers and get pummeled by the NYPD while yelling about the 2nd amendment.
      Now that would be a party, and then Fucked News would have to cover it

  5. Dr_Zoidberg

    You know, if you keep acknowledging these hippies, they'll never go away. Turn the hose on them!!!

    *Off-snark* Seriously, keep up the good work on reporting this. If I wasn't on the other side of the country, I'd love to join in.

  6. El Pinche

    Seriously, thanks Riley for covering this.

    Meanwhile Jake Tapper almost trips over himself trying to get Tea Party Debt Commission conference at an Orlando Denny's. The Denny's was almost packed to capacity…to the pastry and pie bar!

    1. Negropolis

      Yes, yes, this is what we need. You thought indiscriminately brutalizing protestors was going to work, and look what it got you.

  7. x111e7thst

    Would you look at these losers with their logic and their appeals to reason. This needs (many) more surveyors marks and second amendment remedies if it is ever to be taken seriously.

  8. Allmighty_Manos

    "Watch this brave anonymous high school teacher (“I hope my principal doesn’t see this”) talk about what’s happening in New York ".

    Better watch out because Chris Christie might cross the Hudson River and eat him,

    1. prommie

      Christie is away touring the country on his "I'm not running for president" campaign. Palin is sooooooo jealous.

  9. Oblios_Cap

    If you spread wealth to the poor, they will all just blow it at the track.

    However; if you spread it to me, I'll use it all for hookers and blow and stimulate my economy, if you know what I mean.

  10. DahBoner

    "OT: Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg pledged to eat only the animals that he kills himself for a whole year…Did the Facebook mogul actually hunt and kill a bison? Apparently yes. In the past he used a knife to kill animals like a goat, a chicken, and a pig….

    Hippies only eat what they kill, back to the land, man….

      1. bagofmice

        Halal, kosher, They only really argue over the seafood. Obviously the creator is all about a knife to the neck. Looking at you Isaac.

      1. prommie

        How could someone so obviously socially retarded have invented a "social" network? Ah, but its a retarded social network, I see . . . .

  11. El Pinche

    Does anyone even care about the traders and hedge-fund managers who can't get to the plush offices on time?? It's as if these hippies don't care about a billionaire's golf schedule ? I'd suckle and nurture each and everyone of these JOB PRODUCERS if I could! Boot straps , constitution, and less taxes!

  12. Goonemeritus

    All snark aside the idealism and sacrifice of these people makes me ashamed of my lack of direct action. Snark is a very small sabot in the machine of tyrannies gears.

    1. SorosBot

      I read the whole thing; what a condescending, arrogant douchebag. So people who aren't experts in economics are apparently not allowed to have opinions on economic policy; and the "Celebrity X is rich, therefore it's somehow wrong for them to sympathize for the working class" meme is one of most moronic memes the right-wing loves to repeat, over and over again.

  13. Callyson

    NPR finally covered this last night, and of course they spent as much time talking about sanitation issues (they thought it was a big deal that the protesters are not spitting out toothpaste just anywhere after they brush their teeth) as they did talking about the reasons behind the protest.
    Next time they have a pledge drive, I'll tell them to hit Wall Street up for some bucks…

  14. DerrickWildcat

    Rich people aren't called, "rich people" anymore. That guy that combs his hair with a Ham sandwich, oh what's his name, Luntz something, now calls them "Job Creators."
    Calling them, "rich people" is CLASS WARFARE!
    It's just that, "Job Creators" need a little more respect (and Tax Breaks) than actual…uhhh…ahhh…"Job Doers"…which is not class warfare.
    Or something.

    Derrick Wildcat
    5th grade
    PS 128

  15. Schmannnity

    This may be the feel good post of the day, but it sure seems like a good time in the news cycle for a Congressional sex scandal. Come on, Republicans, it's nearly Cocktober!

  16. ttommyunger

    Well, they're starting to attract assorted jaggoffs and gadflies, now if they would just set fire to something or kill someone maybe they could get a teevee crew down there.

  17. DemonicRage

    High school being the kind of institution that it is, if the Principal disagrees with "brave teacher" politically, the next time that brave teacher is scheduled for an impartial observation of his teaching skills, the Principal will come to his room, sit in the back of the room, take notes, and two days later, in his mailbox, brave teacher will receive a file letter saying that he made 1000 errors in teaching. At the end of the year, brave teacher will receive an Unsatisfactory Rating. Because that is the way things are.

  18. rocktonsam

    Doesn't Wall St. have enough to worry about?

    I like these kids. Carry on.

    As seen in Madison,reasonable well behaved people can have a protest without being all shouty and yelling n###er.

  19. Negropolis

    I think they should set up more permanent arrangements in Central Park a la Super Sad True Love Story, and commute down to the Wall everyday.

Comments are closed.