grifters in the news

Bristol Palin Gets Into Bar Fight With Angry Homosexual (VIDEO)

Bristol Palin was in LA filming her new reality teevee show (seventy-two hours of Bristol flopping around on a mechanical bull like a wasted badger) when some off-camera dude started screaming epithets about Sarah Palin. Are the cameras still rolling? Yes, GO: Bristol marches right over to the screamer and demands to know if he is “a homosexual,” since that is how you insult someone Alaska-style. This guy, he is a homosexual as it turns out, and, we are going to randomly guess, a convenient plant from a wicked teevee producer. Or he’s drunk, it doesn’t matter. Angry homos, they make good teevee! We are getting a headache trying to make out the ensuing stream of profanity and hand-waving, but, uh, it is not polite. Screamy details after the jump!

From some intern at CBS LA who was forced to try to transcribe this nonsense:

“Did you ride Levi like that? Your mother is a whore! Your mother is a f***ing devil!” he shouts.

Palin approaches the man and asks, “Is it because you’re a homosexual and that’s why you hate her?”

“Pretty much … and why’d you say I’m a homosexual?” he responds.

“Because I can tell you are,” Bristol says.

“You’re f***ing white trash from Wasila!” he screams as she leaves with her production crew. “F*** you, you f***ing b***h!”

At one point, the man also tells Palin that he doesn’t believe in hell, but that if it exists, he believes her mother will go there.

And that is all the “political news” we can handle for the next Mayan calendar year, wake us up after the apocalypse. [YouTube/CBS LA]

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      1. SorosBot

        From the article:

        "Bristol Palin faced off with an angry bargoer at Saddle Ranch bar and restaurant in West Hollywood Thursday night."

        (Never set foot in California, and even I know that).

          1. Tommmcattt

            Actually, while it is technically "West" Hollywood, Saddle Ranch is up on Sunset above (and not part of) the boystown. It is definably a straight Hollywood vibe- it is kinda by the Viper Room, for example. So it is a bit odd that a drunk homo would be there, particularly at night, since Saddle Ranch is famous for turning into Frat Dick/Wannabe Actor central after dark.

            Nice brunch though. Huge mimosa towers.

          2. genxr

            Frat Dick Central sounds more like the Brisket we've all come to know.

            I'm happy to report that I know nothing about the L.A. bar scene.

    1. Lascauxcaveman

      I hadn't thought of this before, but a mechanical bull is a darn good metaphor for reality-teevee in general.

    2. orygoon

      My thought, also. I guess those of us who figured out that it's more cost-effective to just drink at home have somehow missed out on the finer entertainment offerings and opportunities of gettin' out more.

      1. orygoon

        Hey, look! Somebody seems to be more qualified to have a degree in animal science from Texas A&M than a certain governor and "frontrunner" candidate for the Presidency.

        Gig 'em!

    1. BornInATrailer

      Since it is Friday and we are supposed to be depressing…

      If 10 million people watch that clip, it will be roughly the equivalent of (1) human life of time spent watching a fame whore's spawn ride a bull and get yelled at by an angry gay dude.

  1. Barb

    I'm surprised that the mechanical bull could hold Mama's Chubby Cub.
    Was she really spewing that hate while wearing a Jesus shirt, complete with a cross?

  2. SorosBot

    She's 20 years old, and publicly going into a bar, with the encouragement of the TV producers. Isn't that just a bit illegal?

      1. Doktor Zoom

        Fresh off her triumph on Dancing With the Stars, Bristol will appear on What Made You Think You Could Sing? with her rendition of Zappa's "Why Does It Hurt When I Pee?"

    1. Jukesgrrl

      That's what decade it is in both of her homes — Alaska and Arizona. They had to find her some places in LA where she would be comfortable.

  3. Eve8Apples

    Who the fuck is deciding to put the Palin clan on TV and why does he or she still have a job in television?

    1. Doktor Zoom

      Honestly, I don't care how much sex she has, if she'd just pledge to abstain from appearing on-camera.

        1. Doktor Zoom

          Oh, god, I totally blew that, didn't I? I completely neglected to consider that she might pursue voiceover work. The horror…the horror…

  4. orygoon

    I used to read books about and look at pictures of Alaska and think it was pretty neat. And I guess it was, actually, long-ago-enough.

    Are the people in the next-door part of Canada this disgusting?

    1. bagofmice

      Yep. A bunch of southern white trash truckers moved up in the 70's to build the government funded Alaska pipeline from prudhoe bay to Valdez (Of the Exxon Valdez fame). After living there for a few years, the state pays you for living there from the permanent fund, established by taxing the oil.

      Hi dad.

          1. Pristine_ODummy

            She's certainly HUGE, her mother's Polarizing, and she's often Bare, but I don't know if anyone's considered the conjoining of all three concepts.

  5. GhostBuggy

    I'm sort of aroused by this video, but I am unsure which part. I think it's the yelling. This is all very distressing.

  6. Goonemeritus

    Nice to see the Palin clan continues to elevate the tenor of the conversation. This tribe makes the Wonkinati look like the Algonquin Round Table.

    1. Doktor Zoom

      Why, good sir, I'd have said that it was the Wonkerrati that made us look like the Algonquin Round Table.

      Especially our combined bar tab.

          1. Mort_Sinclair

            Is this where I do my best Dorothy Parker imitation by planting my elbows on the table, taking a long swig of my drink, and sneering, "I've seen bigger balls on a cocker spaniel"?

    2. tessiee

      "the Algonquin Round Table"

      Apropos to the subject of this article, I will quote an Algonquin Round Table Anecdote: Challenged to use the word "horticulture" in a sentence, Dorothy Parker came up with, "You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think".

    1. MissusBarry

      Nice petition, ITTDGY. Spot on. If you'll excuse me, I need to go read the Hatch Act and my sure I can't be fired for signing it.

  7. Schmannnity

    Wait. Is the story that Bristol is out at a bar riding a mechanical bull while the baby is where, or that Bristol is in a gay bar?

          1. Chichikovovich

            Oh, I hope so. 'Cause it must be time for a night of the long knives any moment now. Sean, it's been nice knowin' ya. Probably a good idea not to sleep with your young male lover tonight. Less embarrassing that way.

        1. Schmannnity

          Also, If my profile said "Miami Democrat Anglo straight male," I could no longer say more numerous than manatees.

    1. An_Outhouse

      Poor kid. I wouldn't want to be searching the internet and find a vid of my mother riding a mechanical bull and acting like an ignorant bitch. We do our ignorant bitching in private.

  8. KeepFnThatChicken

    "At one point, the man also tells Palin that he doesn’t believe in hell, but that if it exists, he believes her mother will go there."

    When arguing, it would help if you do not deny a position, then take that position. And "She lives — she breathes" makes you sound like a goddamn teabagger, because they also eschew evidence.

      1. flamingpdog

        We should strap his ass to Bristle and run her on high until he apologizes. Shouldn't take as long so we can get back to drinking sooner.

  9. Barb

    The funny thing is that they had to give the mechanical bull a few girly wine coolers before it would let Bristol mount it.

    1. Pithaughn

      Who's the genius that hid a Sybian inside the mechanical bull machine? Is that Howard in the background there?

  10. FakaktaSouth

    She honestly should not be on a mech bull with that ridiculous chin implant. If that bull hit her in the face she could knock her entire lower mandible off. That shit is gross.

    Also, if I am not a homosexual (never was recruited. thanks fuckers) can I still hate a Palin, and would she be able to tell?

    1. Pristine_ODummy

      Hey, I could sign you up right now, if you want. You won't get your membership badge and stuff for, like, six weeks, though.

        1. Pristine_ODummy

          Wow, you got a toaster? They just offered me years' supply of lube, man. I gotta go talk to HQ. BRB.

  11. Callyson

    Bristol really thinks the only people who hate Saint Sarah are homosexuals? I happen to be a straight woman, conveniently located here in LA, and I'll be glad to tell her why I hate her mother. In detail. Call me, Bristol!

  12. Nostrildamus

    This sort of public incident is why Sarah has a mechanical bull installed in the AK governor's mansion.

    1. Jukesgrrl

      I probably would be too if people paid me $25,000 per for mumbling the story of my pathetic life right after I got my GED. And remember, this is now her second reality TV show. That shit is serious fame in this Armageddon that is U.S. Amurica.

    2. V572 Moon!

      In Bristol's defense (three words I never imagined writing), the culture which spawned her demands that you confront someone who howls obscenities about your mother. However, the whole thing smacks of setup, and Bristol looks a tad too confident to be really mad.

      1. Chichikovovich

        Gotta agree with you there. Being from the frozen tundra myself (socialist side of the border) you don't just laugh it off if some stranger calls your mom a whore. Even if she is one.

  13. SorosBot

    When some drunk guy at a bar yells at me, my first response is always to ask him if he's a homosexual.

    But they're not bigots, no not at all.

      1. Tommmcattt

        Also we've been known to give them sex when the mood is right and there's been enough substances consumed. It's our little secret…

  14. Mort_Sinclair

    Thank you, anonymous man, for making my day! "Fucking white trash from Wasilla!" How many of us have wanted to say that to their faces?

      1. Nothingisamiss

        Although an ability to keep writing while drunk is a needed plus. There's only so much room in a thread for "Fucking white trash from Wasilla!" before another phrase is shouted.

        1. poncho_pilot

          i found out a couple of days ago that wife had never seen Midnight Cowboy and i was listening to Faith No More's album, Angeldust, in the car this morning. then i saw the comment. it all came together like clockwork at the right moment. (just like the after parties at GOP debates.)

          1. flamingpdog

            Ooooo, "clockwork", "movie" and "Republican" – I just had an idea for future snark. No one steal it™, ya hear?

          2. tessiee

            Just a guess: Does it involve wiring their eyelids open and forcing them to watch all of Michael Moore's ouevre while Beethoven plays in the background?

    1. prommie

      "Urban" cowgirl? You know, like the Teabaggers use the word "urban" when people are watching? Is she gonna ride some basketball players, like her whore momma?

  15. JustPixelz

    Is her show "Drinking With The Stars"?

    I used to joke that Bristol became an orphan when her parents died in an ego explosion, but the McGuiness book says that is pretty much literally true.

    How will Sarah Palin™ will blame this on Obama?
    "The President is woefully silent on this kind of bar room bullying."
    "The Obama depression is causing people to lose their manners and their money."
    "This is why we need the death penalty [cheers] so we can ban homosexuals [cheers] from taking away the liberties [cheers] Paul Revere warned us about [confused mumbling, then cheers]."

  16. Sue4466

    Huge fan of the cross & "empowered" sweatshirt. Cause you know Jesus empowerment is all about riding mechanical bulls and bashing the gays.

    1. NorthStarSpanx

      Yeah, with her fashion sense, why didn't she chose Fargo or Jacksonville, FL? Nothing says L.A. Hot more than jesus sweatshirts in 80 degree weather. . .in a bar.

  17. SexySmurf

    Did you ride Levi like that?

    Seeing how the bull ride lasted longer than 20 seconds and Bristol actually moved around a little, I'm going to guess no.

    1. mumbly_joe

      Also, in this video, she actually is probably full of wine coolers, instead of lying and claiming she was later to imply that the mechanical bull raped her.

      1. Chichikovovich

        She also would have claimed that the mechanical bull raping her was Zeus, but the producers told her it would sound too European.

  18. DemonicRage

    Gee. Those shots of her moving up and down on the spine of the mechanical bull make it easy to imagine what she looked like when she and Levi were….er, helping one another with their homework. Do you think that's the point of the ride?

  19. johnnymeatworth

    On the plus side, maybe this will finally get those people from the Ibsen festival to stop calling her about starring in A Doll's House.

    1. Chichikovovich

      Though I would absolutely attend if the Stratford Shakespeare festival got Sarah to star in Macbeth. With McCain as Duncan and Todd as Lady Macbeth.

    2. Limeylizzie

      Oh God, as an actor I actually have been in a couple of productions that were cast by Star fuckers and it is so vile to have to pretend that these people have any talent.

  20. Sue4466

    Bristol, honey, the reason people hate your mom has nothing to do with their being gay. It's cause your mom is a self-righteous dumbass who refuses to go the fuck away already.

    1. Nothingisamiss

      Seriously. Listen, Grifter, Jr, there are plenty of reasons we don't want your dumb as shit mother near our democratic processes.

      1. Beowoof

        Although as age catches up with me the hair thins, yet I still have some hair, and I still hate Sarah Palin.

    1. Tommmcattt

      Right? And since it's non-specific, we could take turns being the President if we win, since all of us are angry about something, and most of us drink like fish…

  21. MLite

    Jesus people, IT'S A TRAP! This kind of stuff feeds right into their conservative victimization mentality. I agree with these guys 100%, but I wish they wouldn't shout it at her daughter when cameras are rolling. The Palinites will lap this up and use it to justify their homophobic bigotry.

    1. genxr

      Yes, because what would they do without a justification for their bigotry? Maybe if we're real nice to them, we can reach some sort of compromise.

      1. MLite

        Fuck them, but this just gives them ammo and helps them recruit. Sarah has built her fortune off of victimization and this is exactly the type of ammo she has used.

        1. Jukesgrrl

          I don't think Sarah "recruits." She just speaks to and represents low-income, poorly educated, gun-totin' whites who think they are Christian and have a trite, mindless slogan/solution for every issue. That 28% of America was already there before Sarah and will be there after she is gone. She's merely their prom queen du jour.

          As for this minority's spawn, I don't think they are all that interested in Bristol. The Kardashian-worshiping masses don't think she's fashionable because she isn't surrounded by the right material goods and Jesus Camp kids were taught to think she's immoral. Who does that leave? Wrestling fans, Junior NRA members, and people who still think Ed Hardy T-shirts are cool? The viewers who voted for her on that dance show were her mother's followers who do whatever Sarah tells them. (Like send her $20 to make up her mind not to run.)

          The Palins aren't a political movement, they're an endless tape loop brought to you by vacuous TV producers.

  22. Wonderthing

    Why can't drunk homosexuals and white trashy snowbilly grifterettes get along? I envision a world where the lamb lies down with the lion. I envision a world where snakes and bees form collectives. I envision…oh shit, this is good stuff.

  23. Neoyorquino

    And this is why, for a grown man, my TV viewing primarily consists of Sponge Bob, Archer, Venture Bros, and various Adult Swim cartoons.

    1. jus_wonderin

      Though, as an avid Law & Order watcher, I can see a "ripped from the headlines" episode featuring the daughter of a pol, a drunken homosexual and a mechanical bull. Okay, that's the Law part. This is one epi that might not have an Order part.

    2. GOPCrusher

      I'm a connoisseur of The Smoking Gun Presents: The World's Dumbest…….
      because, at least, people like Leif Garrett, Tonya Harding, and Danny Bonaduce realize that they are nothing but white trash degenerates, but are willing to laugh at themselves.

  24. Tundra Grifter

    Many years ago (this was back in college) we were in San Francisco when a somewhat drunk fellow began to harass a gay man. I think it was over a parking space.

    Anyway, the gay guy finally got fed up and said "There's only one thing I like more than sucking cock – and that's kicking ass."

    He proceeded to wipe the sidewalk with the face of the inebriant.

  25. Antispandex

    First Santorum, and now Bristol. Who's next? No, seriously, who's next? Oh, and I believe she could tell he was a homosexual. I mean, I could tell she is a c**t, and I've never been near her.

  26. Doktor Zoom

    Ya know, Bristol, when I was in college, I thought I might be homosexual, but I was only half in Ernest.

      1. Doktor Zoom

        Pun stolen from your countryman, dotty sci-fi madman Robert Rankin…not sure whether it was from The Fandom of the Operator or Nostradamus Ate My Hamster, though I rather think it was the former.

        1. Limeylizzie

          My favourite , until you came up with that, were the two gay Scotsmen, and you have to say this with an accent, Ben Doon and Phil McCavity.

    1. tessiee

      "when I was in college, I thought I might be homosexual, but I was only half in Ernest."

      A helpful hint for future liaisons: Keep the K-Y *separate* from the Superglue.

  27. Nothingisamiss

    Why don't we all have a pithy drunken statement of fact when we need one? He did kinda sound like a teabagger. What about: "She stirs up hatred, denies that all Americans are "real Americans" and won't let me marry and drunkenly abuse my partner of choice?"

    Also, too, stop with the abstinence talky talky, sister. Jealous? You bet I am. On the other hand, I wasn't a mother in my teens and a probable grandmother in my thirties. Maybe I don't have the chops to talk about abstinence since my drunken sex was of the sexy, regret-for-the-right -reasons sex.

    1. SorosBot

      We don't usually have a good pithy drunken statement of fact when we need one because of the drunken part, sadly; although the "did you ride Levi like that?" was clever.

    2. Doktor Zoom

      You go to bars with the pithy drunken statement of fact you have, not the pithy drunken statement of fact you wish you had.

  28. OneYieldRegular

    That's one hell of a commercial for abstinence.

    And doesn't this woman have a child or something to raise?

  29. widestanceshakedown

    Bristol + booze + West Hollywood + fight-inciting reality TV production = total bullshit fakery on this whole damn mess.

    Q: What part of this set-up is believable?
    A: None of it, Katie.

    1. Beowoof

      Although as a male I have noticed that I am horny all the time, there is the recognition that comes with age and experience, no matter how horny I am sex with the psycho bitch always goes very badly at some point in the "relationship".

        1. jus_wonderin

          Yeah, and if you hold her under in the tub, don't, I repeat, don't think it is over until the credits roll. We need a term for this type of ending. Pailend?

      1. tessiee

        "no matter how horny I am sex with the psycho bitch always goes very badly "

        Libby Reid sums it up as:
        "Pick the healthy scenario
        a) Have sex with this person
        b) Spend the weekend locked in a roomful of rabid bats"

        PS. How sad is it that *each and every person who read this* immediately had someone that they know come to mind?

  30. strateghost

    I think he was being kind of a dick. I actually thought she handled it okay. But that doesn't mean Sarah isn't a complete whore. in addition.

          1. Extemporanus

            Duly noted, ODummy.

            Going forward, I assure you that I shall endeavor to ensure that any off-hand, obtuse, ostensibly witty wordplay in which I might inelegantly engage meets or exceeds the well established, widely agreed upon, online comment criteria required for said wordplay to be definitively deemed a literally true factual statement.

          2. Pristine_ODummy

            Oh, geezus, did someone piss in your wheaties, son? I'm not here for a big-dicking contest, so you can put that thang back in your pants now. Wow. Hard day at the office? Or just general piss and vinegar? Whatever it is, I want none of it. Relax. Enjoy your life. And leave me the fuck alone.

          3. Extemporanus

            I did indeed lay the snark on a little thick, and for that I apologize. However, was such an over-the-top, off-base, totally vituperative reply really called for? I mean, really? (And if so, did it also have to be so hopelessly unfunny and cliché-laden?)

            Look, I don't know who you think I am — cocky kid ("Son"?!); asshole troll?; verbose cyberbully? — but I've been here a very long time, I'm one of the good guys, and I'm on your side. There's no need to frag a fellow Wonketteer.

            And with that said, I will now heed your order to "enjoy my life" and leave you "the fuck alone", which is exactly what I had been fucking doing (when not love fisting your thirty(?!) comments per day with nary a word) before you chose to reply to me.

          4. PalinzADummy

            No, the apology should be mine. I really am sorry. I'm sorry you found my vituperation unfunny and cliche-laden, but also sorry that I responded with vituperation. I'm sorry I fragged you. I apologize. I won't do it again.


          5. Extemporanus

            With a capital fucking "F".

            It's an absolutely gorgeous evening, so I'm gonna unplug again and go for a nice long walk. I'll be sure to smile warmly and give ya a big ol' wave as I pass on by…

          6. PalinzADummy

            Thank you for accepting my apology. It was a pretty rotten thing to do, and I appreciate your kindness of spirit. Have a wonderful evening. (waves back)

      1. widestanceshakedown

        Agreed, although self-hating GOProud would change her tampon with their teeth if she asked and let them keep it.

  31. veritass

    Sarah Palin lives in Wasilla, Alaska and for her vacation, she travels to the barren wasteland heartland of America to talk politics with old white people on scooters. I like to think she's already in hell.

    1. Jukesgrrl

      Don't forget her new second home in Scottsdale, AZ. If she wants some heat to really remind her of hell, she can go there in the summer.

  32. Nopantsmcgee

    Ok, now I have to root for Bristol. Goddamn it.

    This drunken idiot needs someone to take him out back. I'm a homersexual too, and cannot stand the Palins but this was just plain douchbaggery on his part.

    1. Chichikovovich

      Yeah, I feel the same way. Though there is no doubt in my mind that it was a staged setup to generate sympathy for Bristle, it was a staged representation of prime-grade asshattery.

      But somebody help me out here – is there actually any reason to think the guy is a homosexual? I couldn't stand watching beyond the part where Brisle started talking, so I'm only going by the first couple of things he said, as quoted above. Which seem to be – Bristle reaching for what is evidently a favorite insult – "you're homosexual". Guy says "why do you say that?" Bristle says "I can tell" and guy flips out. Did he later turn to the camera and state, soliloquy-style "Ah, and I am indeed one of those homosexuals you have heard so much about." or something?

  33. LakeLucilleLoon

    Bristol does realize that there are gays in West Hollywood, right? I even know some gays in West Wasilla, where she grew up.

  34. Beowoof

    Clearly staged or she would have called him a fucking fag. That this dimwit gets any media attention is amazing. We truly have allowed to TV to become a circus freak show.
    I still feel fortunate that there are books.

  35. Mort_Sinclair

    On a second viewing, it really appears that Bristol and her hanger-ons don't really seem to have a clue that a whole swath of America HATES the Palins–hates her mother, hates her, and hates everything they stand for. She really, really is a dumb shit.

  36. Radiotherapy®

    You know that scene in Urban Cowboy where Scott Glenn gets all domestic violence on Sissy? That's what I'm thinking with Bristol on a maniacal bull in Wasilla.

      1. Pristine_ODummy

        That poor kid has been doing childcare for Trig from pretty much the moment he was born. It's the kind of thing kids tend to resent, and remember.

    1. Negropolis

      Piper was the one that thanked the media for "ruining" her "family vacation" this summer, so, probably not. Maybe, she'll be able to escape her mother's brainwashing, but I don't have much hope.

  37. BarackMyWorld

    This will end up as a Fox News talking point about how vile liberals/homosexuals are, I just know it.

  38. El Pinche

    “Because I can tell you are,”

    The little fame whorelette is confused because he's not hiding his gay like a conservative/Republican homo .

  39. PlanetWingNut

    something to chew on:

    a friend from another blog board said this –

    Of course it was set up.

    Have you ever seen how they tape these shows on location? They literally shut down the entire block. They park vans of equipment out front and keep the public out of the business — with private security and often the local police. Everyone who is allowed inside works for the production company.

    They don't just walk into any random business and start taping the show. These things are planned by the producers for weeks in advance. They script the entire thing.

      1. mrblifil

        Proven by the fact that the guy does not collapse into a heap of laughter after being asked if he is a "homosexual." Any self respecting homosexual, in response to the evocation of that dated term, would have had the good sense to devolve into gales of cruel peals of mockery, with some well-timed Wildean zingers thrown in for good measure. Because, you know, that's how they do.

        1. Pristine_ODummy

          Wouldja stop giving away our secrets already?

          Totally called it, though. I just can't see any LGBTQ person worth their salt responding with "Yes. How did you know?" when asked. Especially in a straight bar (there's galz in there, either it's a straight bar, or it's been commandeered. Most gay bars are, let's say, not very encouraging to the straight girls).

    1. mumbly_joe

      I'm inclined to agree, strongly, that this was obviously staged. For starters, most people wouldn't be able to tell Bristol Palin apart from a hole in the ground- well, a hole in the ground that poops out babies who are doomed to a lifetime of illiteracy, malice, and grifting.

      But the point being, nobody seeing a teevee crew following around a chubby trust-fund-baby would instantly make the leap to "she's Bristol Palin". She's just not important enough for people to actually recognize in public, and even with the teevee crew, the more reasonable assumptions are things like, "Jersey Shore, but on the West Coast, for some reason" or "The Real World: Orange County".

  40. pdiddycornchips

    Remember a while back when the NY Post's Page 6 announced they would not write another story about Paris Hilton? Can we try something like that with the Snow Grifter clan?

  41. Limeylizzie

    I'm with the big-titted, chin-implanted one on this, that guy needs to be buggered by a stevedore out back.

  42. valgal2342

    Not to defend Bristol or God forbid, Sarah, but that guy had a few hate/anger issues of his own. That said, I agree 100% with Sue4466.

  43. hilbillyheroine

    I can't see Brisket's fingers. I think she might be trying to do a "womb-shifter" move or something. Like mom.

  44. elviouslyqueer

    Just to clarify: F***ing white trash from Wasilla is f***ing. And white. And trash. And from Wasilla.

  45. owhatever

    Brisket finally found a way to have a sexual release without having a baby, via mechanical bestiality, and the moment was ruined by this uncouth drunk. They film this in a bar, what did they expect? Whore diamonds? Probably.

  46. GunToting[Redacted]

    Two questions… Did that mechanical bull have epilepsy? I've never seen one quiver that way.

    And, did her sweatshirt say HemPowered?

  47. JackObin

    I can actually remember when this corpse of a country featured Playhouse 90 on television. Now it featured humanoids with IQ's below 90.

  48. smokefilleddoommate

    I love how the camera guy says, "What's that about, Bristol?" as a stupid attempt to create some narrative. Use your fucking context clues.

    Also, I wish the guy had something a bit more intelligent to say rather than shouting random insults. He just played into the hands of people who create words like 'libunatic.' Bristol actually comes out of this looking rather sane and composed and of course, victimized.

  49. James Michael Curley

    Bristol Palin, a priest and an EMR team member walk into a bar. The medic treated the priest for minor head injuries and Bristol Palin sued OSHA for setting the height of the bar too low.

  50. glamourdammerung

    This is a fantastic parenting example. Oh wait, she never seems to actually have her baby with her except as a prop.

  51. Chichikovovich

    Actually you're in the middle of a Twilight Zone episode, where for almost the whole show you think you're stuck in a world of aggressively stupid jerks, but then at the end you wake up and it was all a dream – really you are in a world of Einsteins and Newtons and Mme Curies and Diderots.

    Haha! Just jackin' with ya. It's true – we really are drowning in an ocean of morons.

  52. ph7

    Who's to blame when situations degenerate?
    Disgusting things you'd never anticipate

    Bombed, crashers gettin' bombed
    Crasher's gettin' bombed, bombed, bombed, bombed, well who's to blame?

  53. ttommyunger

    I can't believe I'm doing this; I think she handled herself, her tormentor and the situation like an intelligent, gutsy and classy broad. She certainly displayed more class than her opponent. Must lie down now, head spinning…..where am I?

    1. Pristine_ODummy

      Wow. Sounds like you had an attack of the OldCootz, dood.

      I dunno. It all seemed staged to me. If someone were calling my mom names, much as I despise the woman, I'd probly clock the sonofabitch. She's MY MOM, i.e., my fucking cross to bear, and I'm the only one who gets to call her the fucking bitch that she is, because I'm the one who had to put up with her shit.

      Pity ShoutyDrunkGayGuy wasn't coherent enough to defend his stance. "Sarah Palin is a whore" might be fun to shout, but much less impressive than "Sarah Palin left Wasilla $20 MILLION in debt, when it was a town of ~5,000."

      1. ttommyunger

        Nobody comes out of a pissing contest dry. She should have ignored the asshole, but then who am I to lecture anyone on propriety?

        1. Pristine_ODummy

          Just my much-respected and much-liked friend who will kick the ass right off anyone violating his standards of propriety (I suspect). But yes, she would have come off a lot better not engaging in the pissing contest.

  54. Sassomatic

    Okay, I'm from the Deep South, so I've seen a girl ride a mechanical bull. Hell, I've BEEN a girl riding a mechanical bull. But I've never seen an actual whore ride a mechanical bull. I've never seen the operator make a girl shake her pussy, like a whore, on the mechanical bull, like that. And that was the classiest part of the whole thing.

    1. Pristine_ODummy

      I thought Tripp was this dimbulb's older brother. No? Isn't the little one named Trick or Frick or something?

  55. Negropolis

    I can't believe this, but I'm sympathizing with Bristol, here. Maybe it's the black in me, but you talk about my momma like that (and she could be Atilla the Hun), and we're going to have a little trouble. And, he shouts vile shit at a woman thinking that she won't or can't beat his ass. Classy.

    But, yeah, that's still a pretty shit family they got their.

    1. NorthStarSpanx

      And one day Brisdull and April's cutesy made-for-tee-vee- in-your-face-keeping-it-real act is going to shatter that glass jaw.

    2. Pristine_ODummy

      Funny, you, me, and ttommy all agree on something. Wouldja look outside and see if the sky is falling? ;-)

  56. slowhansolo

    I'm very sorry in the very likely event I repeat something that went before in this swollen behemoth of a thread, but that "bull" moved about like my 60-year-old aunt at about 11:30 p.m. Christmas Eve.

  57. joeyquicksand

    That guy was a serious asshole. He's like the dweeby gay version of those christian nutcases who picket troops funerals.

  58. Pres.LibunaticBrox

    I see shit like this and I wonder how much longer until the End of Days. Unless this is one of them.

    O yeah, and I dig the trendy Christian hoodie worn by that paragon of Christian family values. As it sayeth in Lunacy 4:20 – "Verily, I say unto thee, if thou shalt have as many Children out of wedlocke as thou wishest, I shall be pleased."

  59. grex1949

    At home, she can do ten minutes on her personal mechanical bull, "Sybian", before she falls off, exhausted.

    1. NorthStarSpanx

      And I'm sure she billed SarahPAC $5,000 to have it wired to take the juice it needs next to the tanning bed.

  60. tessiee

    I'm not a hommasexshul, but may I go on record as saying that I think the Palins are whores and white trash anyway?

  61. Beanball

    It's stuff like this that makes me think that things are looking up, after all.

    And liberal media, you listening? thanks for these memories.

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