Disillusioned American voters have so far spent most of this election season moping pathetically to pollsters about how badly they want to elect “any Republican” over their ex-boyfriend Barack Obama despite consistently choosing Obama as their date to the school dance over every single one of the loser Republican candidates in head-to-head matchups. Today’s new McClatchy-Marist poll is no different on that front — it shows 52% of Americans think Obama will lose to a Republican even as Obama continues to beat every single Republican candidate except one, who is not running, and who America does not want to run: “Giuliani would do the best against the president, leading Obama by 49 percent to 42 percent….And by 58 percent to 32 percent, Republican voters do not want Giuliani, who ran and lost in 2008, to run in 2012.” GAH, so… elect no one? Yes, “no one” is the answer. America would like to just be single for a while.
We sort of suspect America needs this break right now, just for its mental health and self-esteem. Look what’s going on with numbskull grifter-quitter redneck Sarah Palin:
After trailing Obama by more than 20 percentage points in polls all year, the new national survey, taken Sept. 13-14, found Palin trailing the president by just 5 points, 49-44 percent. The key reason: She now leads Obama among independents, a sharp turnaround.
…
By 72 percent to 24 percent, Republicans and Republican-leaning independents do not want Palin to run for president in 2012. Even among tea party supporters – a group that likes Palin – 68 percent do not want her to run.
Right. So let’s recap: Sarah Palin is beating Barack Obama among independents, while her own party and even her own base of teabaggers hate her and do not want her to run. That is some weird masochism right there, America. Might want to get that checked out. [McClatchy]
{ 258 comments }
Yeah, good luck getting all the black cooties out of the White House when Obama is done.
Also the watermelon patch in the front yard and the portable mosque in the WH living room.
El, they should have gotten a security deposit out of a brotha.
And the fried chicken bones out from under the sofa cushions. Need some illegal Messican maids for that, tell you whut.
You know how hard it is to get Soul-Glow stains out of the upholstery? T-Paw ain't gonna deal with that hassle.
Barry's bather: "The royal penis is clean, your Highness. "
You know what is sad? This is an exact replica of a Yahoo thread. Kudos, Wonkateers!
Poe's Law, or a real paradigm shift?
I was reading a Yahoo thread yesterday and there was a reference to Osambo, but they're not racist.
Some of their best friends are black.
They, like Trump, like the black.
Sambo was Indian, not African, anyway.
FACT: there are no tigers in Africa.
ALSO FACT: all that said, 'sambo' was the Spanish expression for an individual of mixed African/Native American background.
Forgot to cover themselves with the fig-leaf of "I'll bet teatards think that…"
President Any Republican's first order of business will certainly be installing one of those wonderful carport bathrooms for the coloreds to use from now on. Clear oversight on W's part not to have done that as soon as the 2008 returns came in.
♪♫Happy birthday to you…♪♬
Thank you! You get kisses.
The internet says that its your birthday, Barb. I believe everything on the internet so Happy Birthday!
Yes, I was just giving my banking information over to some diplomat from Kenya. I won the lottery there! Who knew? Thanks!
I just turned 51 this month. Virgos rule
Happy belated birthday!
49 last week. Does this mean we totally get to attach ourselves to the gubbmint teat now?
My hubby's a Virgo, and yes indeedy, they do rule. In bed, also.
Happy Birthday Barb, hope to see many more years of the funny.
Thank you!
Not to mention the gallons of Lemon Pledge they're gonna need to get the Jheri Curl activator residue off the Oval Office desk.
I don't get it.
Oh, yeah! Happy Birthday! How old are you, again? Eleventy-twenty-six?
Thank you. I am thirty-nineteen. (49)
I've been that since June. It always sounds like a fib when I say I'm 49. actually hitting 50 will sort of be a relief.
I know that my daughter Victoria will call today and accuse me of fibbing about my age. I am the second youngest of nine children, all a year apart. She knows my sister, Nancy just turned 50 last week. How can we both be 50? Did my mom's clown car uterus die for 11 days and I just couldn't get out the day that Nancy did?
"actually hitting 50 will sort of be a relief"
I can assure you, sir – it's not.
I’d flirt with ya Barb, but you’re too young.
What a coincidence! I've been 29 for going on 16 years now. One of these days, I might actually reach 30.
I have accepted my old age and being a grandfather with grace. Well maybe not but that 58 number is due next month and it is both liberating, as I don't care much anymore about what people think and scary as the wrong bones are stiff these days.
Many happies, Barb!
Santorum should change his name to Albert Republican and use his initial instead of first name on the ballot.
Can we Googlebomb A. Republican to mean something dirty, too?
Hard to imagine that we could devise something more revolting than what it already means.
And then how soon until "A. Republican" would be defined as "…a frothy mix…"?
"It's not you it's me. I just need a little time to myself"
-America-
I can tell you have done this before.
America is telling a lot of its friends about how it feels better now and liberally overuses the phrases "recharging my batteries" and "rebuilding my infrastructure". It even talks vaguely about getting together with the EU boys and going to Vegas or Cabo or laying seige to a Middle Eastern country, but it never seems to materialize. Instead, America sits at home most nights drinking and watching porn, usually the Asian stuff where China fucks its neighbors, and every so often reflects about how it used to have that much fun, too, back when it was younger.
You forgot that America also said that it wants to get it's self back (whatever that means) and return to its glory days. Poor kid is in a state of denial.
Not Me / Ida Know 2012!
Clearly, Sarah Palin's time has come.
I predict that she will step into the GOP race late.
Agreed.
But not on a Republican ticket. On a one-way ticket to nowhere.
Yeah, like after it done.
Last time Lou Sarah came was when Glen Rice was spankin that azz.
I seem to remember a time when "Independent" meant, "As a reasonable person, I do not align myself with either bullshit party." Not so much?
Now it's like the "No Lables" assholes. Republicans are so embarrassed by Dubya, teatards and bungholes in congress, they refer to themselves as "Independent".
But why? Dubya was a RINO, it turned out, and never governed like a 'true' Conservative.
And on that, I give the Democrats much credit: even as the GOP tars them as Stalinists, the Dems, unlike the Reps, never purge their history. No one says, "Oh, Clinton? DINO. Carter? DINO. LBJ? DINO". But every GOP, once out of office — with the obvious exception of Teflon Ron — is a RINO.
Funny.
(Of course, the Dems do have two men they call DINO, but Liebermann and Wario actually deserve to be treated as men apart.)
Independent usually means either "I vote for the same party every time, but am a special unique snowflake who like to brag about how I'm better than everyone else because I'm non-partisan, even though I'm really totally partisan" or "I'm a dumbass who pays no attention to politics, don't care about what's going on and will probably vote for whoever I'd most want a beer with."
Regardless, declaring one's self to be an "independent" voter has become the only surefire way to make politicians even pretend to care what one thinks. Obama has practically abandoned the base of supporters who put him in office in a vain quest to capture the support of the all-important, ever-elusive independent voter.
Personally, I like being able to vote in primaries; especially living in a city where the Democratic candidate always wins in local election, so the primary is the only election that matters; and think registering as an independent and only being able to vote in the general election is foolish.
Yeah, what it really is just a personalization of the American Exceptionalism bullshit. Everybody gets a trophy!
Ponder this: Bill O'Really declares himself to be an Independent.
I WILL PONDER NO SUCH THING.
I have always considered Bill-O an in/falafel/out.
Independent now means 'I'm not registered to vote. Did you see Dancing with the Stars last night?'
"I love you, but I'm not in love with you."
–America, 2012
It's not you it's me. Maybe we were just too young to settle down and do this Government thing. Can we still be friends?
actually, i think it's them.
My dear it's always them…always.
Well, if we don't have a president let's make sure we don't get a department chair.
Or God forbid a dean.
*shudder*
I've always asserted that the ideal form of faculty governance is anarcho-syndicalism. Which, after consideration, is rather redundant given how things operate de facto in the towers anyway.
BTW, why Ivory Towers always gotta' be white? Why can't we have no Ebony Towers, hengh?
Here's your big chance Louie Gohmert!!
"derpa derp derp…"
Well,I happen to think Palin is a fabulously capable politician and a truly warm and gifted human being.
HAHA. PSYCH!
I think you meant "gRifted".
Brainwashed by North Koreans, I see.
Who happen to be our allies, of course.
"The key reason: She now leads Obama among independents, a sharp turnaround."
The key reason (Palin's doing better): She shut the fuck up and America likes her better when she's not around!
FIXED.
Also the methodology of the poll: it was conducted at low-priced hair salons and weekend swap meets in Alaska, Idaho and the deep south.
I don't know what-all's going on with the Repuglycan'ts, but it seems each of their candidates lasts about two weeks, at best.
Grifterella? 9iu11iani? People really don't remember more than five minutes ago, do they?
It's a cunning stratagem by Wasila Meth Queen. Run Michele Bachmann so she can look more saner….Very sly.
Worked like a charm, too.
"Squirrel!"
SNOWBALLS CHANCE LIBEL!!!!
Real "Independents" don't even answer the goddamn phone for these pollsters, so there!
well i know i would still take obama home at night.
Yeah, but it wouldn't turn out like you imagine. You're probably thinking — a night of passion. Instead you'd get a moderate approach, professorial foreplay and negotiated positions.
I'm with you there, I still love him and I especially love him when he's angry, but I feel that way about my husband as well, I have been known to deliberately do things that I know will make him angry just so he will do the furious, sexy thing and then we can have the good make-up sex. I bet Michelle does that as well.
Michelle (shaking finger in my face): "Don't you do that, uh uh."
Me: "Don't shake that finger at me."
M.O.: "Who do you think you are?"
D.R.: " Get over here… I'll show you who I am."
Wow, I think I need to go home now…
That is so hot, DR.
Grrr…
Hey, I broke out in a sweat.
Oh, shit — it all makes sense now.
I've asked this before. Who are these fuckwits that are polled? These are the same idiots that decided the American Jobs Acts wouldn't make any difference and then overwhelmingly supported each individual measure in the bill. They hate health care reform, but love everything actuallyin HCR.
Again, media? You're fucking the country.
I always wonder that. Why didn't they call me? Or, apparently, anyone I know?
People with landlines. Not be say all people with landlines are incapable of critical thinking. Still, I think it may be telling these days.
To clarify: People with landlines who don't immediately hang up when they hear the telemarketing background noise and actually answer the lame-ass questions asked of them because a) they're lonely shut-ins or b) they think they've won something.
And before that, who either don't have caller ID or actually answer when they see a call is from UNKNOWN CALLER from a 1-800 (or 866, etc.) number.
I don't have caller ID. Not many people have my telephone number, so I'm fairly likely to pick up.
I have a landline. I have lived in the same home, with the same phone number, for 30 years. I have never received a call from a pollster, nor has anyone I know, and some of these people also have landlines.
I suspect they restrict their polling to Bumfuck, Idaho.
I think they 'hire' interns and co-ops or anybody else that will work for free. The 'pollsters' then go stake out the mall and hang with their friends, occasionally asking somebody something.
Giuliani would do the best against the president
Good grief. This effing country is doomed.
~
SRSLY. Which President, methheads?
Like Palin (as Terry points out below) 9udy Giu11ani is better enjoyed when absent.
I actually love this idea, because I'm pretty certain that Rudy's pretty little lisp would drive even the most ardent fan of 9/11 to cry.
Remember, there were Newt Gingrich was polling well before he entered the race and opened his fat mouth too.
Sarah Palin's numbers have improved because she hasn't been on the TV lately.
That and the fact that she took down a black guy when she was younger.
Well, we do live in a post-racial America, and we want a President who reflects that.
If we thought 2008 was amusing then 2012 is going to be the shit.
I suspect the reason why Palin has suddenly jumped up among Independents is for two reasons:
1) She hasn't been quoted saying anything stupid in a month
2) US America is like a cat… "You're distant, I love you." "You're near me, I hate you." So when she runs, her support will sag like boobs to gravity.
"..sag like boobs to gravity." Good one. This is why I love the hot tub, I feel like I'm 19 again. The girls just bob around like ducks.
As DaRooster said above, I think I need to go home now.
I AM home, dammit.
It's way too early to look at polls. There's so much more bad economic news heading our way that by the time the election is upon us, we'll be eating cat food and burning our
furniture for fuel.
Meanwhile old school conservative hayseed Lamar Alexander is easing out of his conference chair — with a Palinesque "lemme serve our party better in a non-leadership role!" — and fellow ageing dinglesaurus Tommy Thompson begs to be taken seriously by this new generation of teabuggers all too happy to aim their party slogan of "No!" at him.
Still working out how this fits into the prom night metaphor, though…
Lamar will be caught with hand in cookie jar/ manpanties of intern forthwith.
Lamar Alexander is the chaperone who ducks out to take a few sips from his flask. Tommy Thompson is the chaperone who wants to get on the dance floor because he thinks he has moves.
A college classmate of mine dated Tommy's nephew. She claimed her beau used to mow the lawn at the governor's mansion. At, I'm sure, a mark-up on what a state employee would have gotten.
"Palin trailing the president by just 5 points, 49-44 percent. The key reason: She now leads Obama among independents, a sharp turnaround."
Are these the same idiots that register as "Independents" or "N.A" on Politico.com just to troll the boards with wingnut talking points?
Take #2:
Well, that about wraps it up for this whole "America" thing.
The Republicans have outkicked their coverage. They spent thirty years not only TELLING people government was the problem, but also trying to prove it. They said they were the "smart, fiscal CONSERVatives with family values" while they stupidly and repeatedly pissed all the money away when they were in charge. Meanwhile the blowjob monger Bill C got some young ass AND balanced the budget, only to have W come in and fuck it all up again, but worse. Now their brainwashed masses are so thoroughly confused they are just jumping in circles. Fuck em.
government is dead! long live government!
I believe this is why Twain wrote: "No sane man can be happy, for to him life is real, and he sees what a fearful thing it is. Only the mad can be happy, and not many of those."
Hate to throw cold water on ya but the teabageers are not happy. The teabaggers are mad. The teabaggers are insane. The teabaggers like Shania Twain. You were referring to her and not Samuel, right?
CREEPING SHANIA!!!!
Married to a tax dodger who lives in anti-Sharia Switzerland. So, the Tea Party should love her.
They like Shania for the same reason they like $arah, ie: tits.
In a TPC-Rasmussen poll of 6500 likely voters, self-proclaimed independents preferred "A dead beagle wearing a Milton Friedman mask" to Barack Obama by 68% to 32%. Republicans asked the same question polled the dead beagle at 56% over Rick Perry at 22%, whilst Tea Party members asked whether it could be a possum instead.
Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with these people getting polled?
heh hey — OT but WELCOME BACK
/OT: My thoughts: perhaps the Tequila Party, ostensibly Independent but with Republi-roots, could've messed around w/ pollsters in their responses just to make a point?
Haha, thanks dude! I'm stuck many time zones away for a couple of months and I'm missing my wonkette homies
I'd love to see some of the technical details on this "poll." It sounds like it is so methodologically fucked up that even a non-quant like me could smush it like a fat bug. I'm pretty sure their sample consisted of pollsters hectoring people over several months at the local Denny's somewhere in Old White Florida.
p.s. adding to Mumble's bienvenido. I bet it will help you tons when we go off DST, right?
9/11, never forget.
No seriously America, do you fucking remember what a piece of shit Rudy was?? Do you? DO YOU?!
Was?
If only he had stayed in his command center…
And speaking of trying to forget 9/11, seems the polled don't remember that Bernie Kerik, a current guest at a feral institution for penile dysfunction (or something like that), was cross-dressing Rudy's minister of truth, justice, and the American way.
Fun fact: if we elect nobody, the 25th amendment says the vacancy in the office will be filled by the Director of Sanitation of the City of Ottawa, Kansas.
So, you're saying that the Green Party Dog Catcher has a real shot this year?
Sid Harris used to do an occasional strip in NatLamp with the premise that the presidency went to the person who scored highest on the Civil service Exam every 4 years. An idea whose time has come?
In Philip K. Dick's novel Solar Lottery, presidents were chosen by the random decay of a radioactive atom. Your plan is guaranteed to be an improvement. Mine is guaranteed to be no worse than what we've got already.
I thought it was Ottawa, Ontario. I really should have paid attention in civics class.
If Palin REALLY wants to up her numbers, she should consider pulling a train with the Harlem Globetrotters.
what do you think she's been doing for the last few weeks?
Hey, Glen got her before those meat curtains were floor length. I doubt the Globe Trotters want any part of the Wasilla Caverns.
Maybe we should elect God as President. He can fix the economy while he's at it.
The rules of succession are a little blurry, in that case.
In swing states, you need to show two forms of ID before you can pray.
If he does the same job on the economy that he did on those Texas wildfires and drought after Six-shooter Rick's Day of the Pray, we'll be living in a rummaging-in- landfills-based economy within weeks.
BIRFF CERT OR GTFO, jesus!!!
NONE OF THEM, KATIE!
Is that an ad for Levi's book? WTF? What kind of target audience are we here? Have we gone from quoting Mark Twain and T.S. Eliot to this? The thought of wonketteers reading Levi's book gives me a sad.
I think it's more the fault of an idiot marketer than our wonketters. Someone heard we're some kinda liberal "weblog" or whatnot and so we'd of course be interested in reading Levi's ghostwriter gossip about Bristol's boobs or whatever.
Bitches don't know bout my WARBLOG
My gut aches, and a funny feeling hurts my head. As if on coolers I got drunk, or barfed some big chunks to the drains….
Ode to a Camping Trip — Levi Johnson
Those are customized ads. Only you can see it.
Look on the bright side–Wonkette is getting advertising revenue from morons without the morons making any sales.
Profit!!!
A certain number of ads are placed based on how often a word (say, "Palin" for example) shows up in the content of the site. This is why we sometimes get ads for books by all the dimwit far-right scribblers here, too. Because we are constantly mocking them, by name.
Belgium has done okay without a government for over a year. Somalia? Not so much.
more American Exceptionalism at play – we're the best at holding two opposing opinions simultaneously while blissfully ignoring the obvious glaring contradictions.
Suck on that, "educated", elitist nations!
52% of Americans think Obama will lose to a Republican even as Obama continues to beat every single Republican candidate
This would fit semantically and logically if those polled thought they were responding to: "Is Obama a loser?" Saying "Yes" to the monikslur doesn't necessarily imply that he'll *actually* lose to the opposing party candidate. I mean we are talking hig-school scenario right? where you're insulting your BFF one minute then shrugging it off the next, all "but I don't really 'care'."
Sarah Palin/Glen Rice 2012
"Black to basics, for the children!"
The only people who are never wrong, in the eyes of the press, are Republican/tea bagger voters.
What's really high-sterical is that Obama is measured against a perfect score, while the Republicans are measured against a standard of "not a total gibbering psychotic at this particular moment."
Rick Perry is just the cutest little sex pot of a political thinker ever because he drops his "gs" and only shot a coyote and not a little kid on his last jog.
That's why he's willing to have Cheney as Veep – in case he needs to shoot a friend or something.
OT, but today is the birthday of überkommentrix Barb, whose unfailing wit improves every post where it appears, which is all of them. Join me in wishing her many happy returns!
Yay, happy b-day, Barb and the sleeping kitty!
Thanks!
Fisted and joined! (Waaay better than lame "fanned and flagged")
Happy Birthday, Barb! Hope it's a great one!
Thank you, It's great and I am enjoying it.
Happy B-day Barb. Tried to shove a Hostess cupcake with a candle through the USB & now having to clean icing and wax from the portal.
Thank you, I LOVE those things!
That sounds kinda naughty.
Recycling old ass-kissing?
buttsechs never gets old
Happy thirtynineteenth birthday to Barb!
Thank you, fellow kitty friend.
Happy birthday Barb! From your most worthy wokette skum.
Kisses and hugs, honey!
EQ
Kisses back and thank you!
Thanks V, call me later and I will give you vicious Dan gossip. You were right about the racino stuff, Jeff said, thanks! My phone is charging and I have to make brownies for Winona.
Tell me if you got the email from the iPad. I am having the worst time setting it up.
iPads are nothing but trouble. Even if you do get it working, no one can really type on the feedback-less “virtual” keyboard. At least no one with anything clever to say.
Sent from my iPad
Hippo birdies to you, Barb, our ever-faithful* Wit-keteer!
*Benincasa?? #*&!#^#(!
Thanks Sweet Flaming!
Happy Bday from everyone down here! We're all big fans of wicked humor — and the best of it comes from non-wicked people. (Trust me, we're connoisseurs.)
Oh, absolutely. And your little kitty too, Barb! Hahahaha! Pawleen. We'll see about that, my girl.
Oh, wut? This was supposed to be happy birfday? Right. Happy Birfday, Barb~!
"Independents" obviously refers to "inmates at privately-owned mental institutions", as opposed to those partisan state-run looney bins.
or "Kooktards," as some of the politically incorrect like to refer to them.
We need to talk. I think maybe it would be a good idea if, you know, we started seeing other countries for a while. You know, explore our options. Hey, hey, don't cry…
Oh please. I read the poll's methodology. You'd get more reliable, statistically significant findings from a grade school slambook.
I've been saying it for a while but it bears repeating: J. Mascis for President!!!
Freak Scene is such great break-up song!
I was goggling the lyrics and I found out Blink 182 covered it! GROSS!!!!
If it weren't such a cool song, I would totally purge it from my brain, based on that terrible revelation. As it is, I'll just go on believing that Blink 182 are a bunch of whiny hack famewhore non-musicians. Living well is the best revenge.
I know you're out there…
America: I came for the freedom..but I stayed for the multiple personality disorder.
We do not like to say "a country without a president". Let's just call it "in between presidents".
I say, let's flirt with a monarchy. All the pomp and circumstance is just what America needs to get ourselves out of this funk!
Altho, I'd still take Obama home after the party….
I'm uncomfortable saying "bring in da noise, bring in da funk." Couldn't we just say that there will be funk and noise, and some point, they'll be brought out?
Can I vote for none of the above please? It's not that I lost my man-crush on Barry….I just know that as long as fucksticks like Cuntor and Bitch McConnell are in Congress not a fucking thing is going to get done with a negra commander in chief. So please, lets just put an overstuffed armchair in the white house – we can't do any worse, amiright?
This is why I have been searching for The Plan To Take Back Congress since 2010 (Actually, where was The Plan To Defend Congress in 2010?)
Some Lefties are just as primitive in their simple-minded thinking as Religious Nutjobs who think God runs the Fed. Oh, we'll just vote for President every 4 years and pray that Our Guy will magically solve all of our problems with his omnipotent powers to change everything! Wait, what? It doesn't work that way? Then we'll just stay home and wait for our savage beatings!
Couldn't agree more. Although weary from the fight I don't plan to sit back in the upcoming election cycle. I am going to be out there with my time and cash to help get rid of as many of the teabag morons as possible.
Kudos. We can't stop working to make the change.
Yeah, let's not have a president. Because congress is doing a bang up job of running the country all by itself.
I guess bang up to the teabaggers means hitting the wall repeatedly with their concussed brains.
Doing a fine job of screwing the middle class, you mean?
Yeah, let's not have a president. Because congress is doing a bang up job of
runningruining the country all by itself.FIFY, NNTT
Hah, that's nothing. Obama 2008 could beat Obama 2012.
Today's independents seem to revel in oppositional/defiant disorder. I hear "I blame both parties" daily. Yeah, that'll fix things…
2012 the election of "meh whatever"
I say run the country for a few years with some sort of mob-sourced Twitter-based system of some kind or another and see how it goes.
ceiling cat is in ur supreme court makin ur lawz!
Ceiling Cat would do a damn sight better than the current Roberts/Scalito/Thomas shit floating around there.
The candidate who gets the most Twitter followers is elected. The bill that gets the most upfists is enacted. This is going to work great!
Feel the Newt-mentum!
Ah yes that old fraud who dumps any wife who gets sick has the strategy: hire folks to sign up to be your followers. As always it comes back to who can afford the most paid posters.
Maybe Santorum could have his friends at Google help set up something.
cant we just be friends with entitlements?
If Palin could beat Obama, then I think there better be a Democratic primary.
I propose a raffle contest where anyone who wants to be President gets the opportunity to serve as President for a day. You buy a raffle ticket (proceeds going to pay off the national debt) and you are entered in a random drawing. Each day we pick a ticket out of the hat. The person with the matching raffle ticket serves as President for 24 hours.
For my stint, I want to meet with Sarkozy in Paris. Not because I like Sarkozy, but so I can drool over his wife for awhile then go eat some really kick ass French food. Whoever is before me, please make sure AF1 is fueled and ready.
At the risk of writing a serious , snarkless comment, a lot of my friends hope Palin runs as they think it would ensure a win for Barry. Perhaps there are more people of this opinion than we reckoned? It would explain the weird numbers. Personally I don't trust the American people enough to want to run such a risk (you almost elected GW twice, after all) but ho hum, maybe…
Palin/Disaster 2012!
But we never actually elected him. Scalia and Ken Blackwell did.
Hence my use of the word 'almost'.
The simple solution to this is Harry Potter. We had Voldemort as Vice President for eight years.
"Who's running?….oh look, Dancing with the Stars is on!" / "Huh? …man Kim Kardashian's ass is looking good. OMFG! I got two new facebook friends! . What are talking about ? President? " 2012
Hey Sarah and Rudy, did you see this? The less the people see of you, the more they like you. Oh, and they still don't like you.
I just hope America doesn't get all depressed about this and sit around renting chick flicks and eating bon-bons all night….
I don't know about the rest of America, but we ate a pint of Cherry Garcia (the local grocery doesn't carry Schweddy Balls, sob!) and watched The Rocking Horse Winner, a cool little English film from the '50s based on a D.H. Lawrence story (of which I'd never heard).
Hooray!! A POLL!! Now I know what to think!!
It is as Jello Biafra foretold.
So how soon do the Teabaggers decide to break up the expensive, overhead-heavy union so they can keep their precious tax dollars? One point six trillion dollars will buy one helluva bass boat.
So, the Republicans are returning to their Whig roots.
Enron, where's Enron? I want Enron taking that oath in January 2012, on a cold and blustery Washington morning, with its corporate hand on a stack of patriotic bibles.
I get to spend my Friday at a work team-building event. Here were the results of our poll to see what we would do:
Go Kart – 0 votes
Six Flags Marine World – 3 votes
Laser Tag – 2 votes
Movie – 1 vote
Dodge Ball – 2 votes
Needless to say we are going Go Kart-ing. This is why polls suck.
I've done laser tag as a previous employer's teambuilding exercise. I was in the middle of asking myself how wandering around a dark maze trying to shoot an unseen opponent using tools I'd never touched before five minutes ago helped build a team. Then I saw the work parallel and was just sad. Then I got shot.
I was the sole vote for a movie. The less I have to talk to my team the better for everyone. Although Laser Tag would've helped me live out my going postal fantasy.
A team-building event? Ugh; hope you can survive with sanity intact. Hey, maybe someone will even speak English instead of Corporatese.
Our division is going to do paintball. Of the 45 or so people I work with, I think maybe 3 or 4 are under 45, most are in their 50s or early 60s. I expect the participation to be underwhelming. We did bowling last time.
Who thinks up this shit, anyway? The last time we had one of those bullshit things, it was whitewater rafting. Right. Take a bunch of nerdy scientist type geeks, all shortsighted as fuck, out of shape because we ALL spend 14 hours per day hunched over our computers, and set them loose under conditions where their glasses will get knocked off and they'll be groping each other myopically as they desperately thrash to get back to terra firma. The miracle is, nobody got hurt. Team cohesion took a huge fucking hit, though. No one spoke to anyone else all the way back to our homes.
Life really is a Dilbert cartoon.
Actually, Life is Hell.
Laser Tag? I don't think employers should encourage employees to shoot each other – even in jest – as part of a "teambuilding" exercise. Now, if the employer wants to "downsize" and doesn't care who gets canned, then by all means encourage workplace violence.
They figure having a black guy hold the office debased the Presidency so badly, they just want to do away with the position entirely. To them, the Oval Office has been rendered unclean. To their minds, not even burning sulfur can make it pristine again.
Cool Limbaugh 2012 campaign button. Rush's photo so accurately depicts him.
I'm pretty sure my teenagers could run the country better than this and still take two days off per week to smoke weed.
For Barb's b-day:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ztoSUhbNntQ
That was just simply awesome, thanks! It made my heart smile.
That's my job.
Gee, you'd think the Tea Party will snatch defeat out of the jaws of victory?
Not to make light of my own career achievements, but you have to admit, Mike Castle would have had that seat sewed up, if not for *preen* me.
I also hate govmint, which is no dang good. Now send my VA and Social Security chex .Rite now!
Rudy? Fucking great! Maybe his BFF Bernie Kerik will be out of prison in time to jump on the Ticket as VP; couldn't do worse than Agnew, Right? BTW, still sayin' Palin will be Perry's Ticket (and sex) partner.
"Independents" is PC for "stupids."
Palin…rising in polls? absence makes the mind funder….
This is bad news for Bachmann. Not One L, – Marcus. He already had the windows measured for new drapes all around and BIG PLANS for the Lincoln Bedroom…
I'm sorry, but in what godforsaken corner of America do "independents" actually think Palin would be a better choice than Obama? I very much hope that this is a seriously fucked-up survey.
Sarah is beating Obama among independents, and I'm the fucking Dutchess of Cornwall. Bull-fuckin'-shit. Obviously, something very wrong happened when taking the poll once they got to Palin.
I wish Elizabeth Kubler-Ross had come up with a "Seven Stages of Aging" because, if so, I think I'd pretty much be stuck at "denial." Which, according to my calculation, comes right after "Moisturizing furiously and dyeing my hair compulsively every two weeks" and right before "Contemplating Botox."
But what about that sweet AARP membership?
Well … you know … good things white, bad things … nobody ever says they got whitemailed, or something whitened their reputation.
Comments on this entry are closed.