flotus files

FLOTUS Body Double Parties With Britney Spears, Probably On U.S. Dime

That's MRS. Flotus to you...Yawn, there goes Michelle Obama again, partying in Europe with a bunch of celebrities when she is supposed to be doing her job (locking Malia in her room until she eats her broccoli). This time, our FLOTUS is not even trying to mask her frivolous night out as “official business,” shamelessly eating at an Indian restaurant with Britney Spears, Mr. Bean and Pavarotti while Americans’ tax dollars most likely paid for every single samosa. Actually, though, it was not Michelle Obama herself that enjoyed the party in Burton-on-Trent, Staffordshire, whatever that is. It was her secret body double! So how much money does that Michelle Obama steal from the pockets of hardworking Americans?

Apparently the British have nothing better to do than goof around in Indian restaurants and confuse paying customers, which is of course why we had to Revolution against them back when Jesus ruled Washington, DC. So they sent their most convincing “celebrity lookalikes” to take amusing photos and get some laffs. “Celebrities” in this case would be Michelle Obama and the cast of BBC’s The Office.

They are all professional lookalikes – and caused a few raised eyebrows when they gathered in the unlikely setting of an Indian restaurant in Burton-on-Trent, Staffordshire.

Diners at the Apne restaurant were stunned to see Britney Spears feeding Simon Cowell onion bhajis – before whacking him when he pinched one too many. Cowell’s double Andrew Monk, 52, was once chosen by the music mogul as his favourite lookalike, while Spears impersonator Michaela Weeks, 27, has received recognition on the singer’s website.

Michelle Obama is better known as Dionne Rose, 46, and Formula 1 driver Jenson Button goes by the name of Nick Lancaster, 29.

The group, led by the Pavarotti doppleganger Colin Miller, 60, will compete in the global lookalike contest ‘Reel Awards’ in Las Vegas on February 21 next year.

Colin, who earns up to £1,000 a week for appearing as the late opera singer, said: ‘We are all looking to fly out to Las Vegas to take part in an annual convention for look-a-likes. Every year, Americans romp away with the awards. We want to go out there to fly the flag for Britain.

‘Americans like to come first and it is our plan to get a good number of lookalikes together and go over and take part.

Surprisingly, or maybe not, because no one does racist comments quite like the U.S. of A., the Michelle Obama lookalike did not receive as much criticism as she probably should have, for wasting so much of America’s time at a joke party with the mean man from American Idol. The only one taking racist hits was, somehow, Mr. Bean:

Why has the Mr Bean lookalike blacked up? – Matt, Glasgow, 08/9/2011

[Daily Mail]

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About the author

Blair Burke obsessively follows Michelle Obama's every move and fashion decision for Wonkette's The FLOTUS Files feature, which appears here every Monday.

View all articles by Blair Burke

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60 comments

  1. nounverb911

    Haven't we had a body double in the White House for these past few years? Where is the Barry we elected?

  2. BeWoot

    Where's the Mitch McConnell look-alike? That guy, I wanna see. (And maybe have my body double punch him in the wattle.)

    1. ThundercatHo

      So now you understand why all the ladies here get moist for the guys with the european and aussie accents. Women's intuition, we can just tell.

    1. freakishlywrong

      I was thinking the same thing. The only thing she has in common with our FLOTUS is skin color. *See my comment above.

  3. fuflans

    if i were michelle, i would send my doppleganger to the white house full time and spend four – eight years in the luberon.

  4. Goonemeritus

    We used to create the trends that Britain followed (admittedly in a weird only semi recognizable way). Since Margaret Thatcher it has gone all pear shaped now we are following them. I confidently predict closed circuit cameras being rolled out here in mass and hoodie clad idol youth trampling my lawn within the decade.

  5. proudgrampa

    I've been told that I like Jesse Ventura. I am not sure I want to look like Jesse Ventura.

    I'd much rather look like Bill Gates (or at least have my bank account look like his).

  6. anniegetyerfun

    "Hit me, baby! The day Becks and Brent had a curry with Britney (who was none too pleased when Cowell scoffed all the onion bhajis)"

    I can't tell if I am simply horrified that that is a headline in the UK, or tickled that British people obviously know enough about their national cuisine (curry) to be able to read the word "bhaji" in print without necessitating a footnote.

  7. charlesdegoal

    So this is what they did in Richard-Burton-on-Trent-Lott, Straponshire? I thought it was going to be a sound-alike contest,

    1. mereoblivion

      Obama say Samosa, Osama say Mimosa
      Then they both ride a llama on the isle of Formosa
      Pajama
      Sub rosa!
      Yo' mama
      Ponderosa!
      Let's call the whole thing off

  8. SayItWithWookies

    Hell, I don't even know most of the people these lookalikes are supposed to look like — although I am pretty happy I don't have to make money pretending to be Simon Cowell — there are things more depressing than being a regular schlub, and that'll be on the list of things I'm grateful for at least the rest of the week.

  9. WunkRocker

    I think I speak for all the WonkTards when I say, "Tits or GTFO." Thank you. Ask not what your country can do for you.

  10. LiveToServeYa

    Today, we are all fake fake people. Except for those of us who are fake corporations, who are fake people.

  11. gurukalehuru

    Oh, say, for what were alehouses meant
    and why was Burton built on Trent
    for malt does more than Milton can
    to justify God's ways to man

    anyway, of the ones I know (the East Ender lady could be the real deal and just saying she's a body double for all I know. Rembrandt used to paint fake Rembrandt's because he could get more for them) I thought Britney, Pavarotti and Elton John were pretty good. Mr. Bean and Michelle Obama weren't even close

  12. owhatever

    You mean I wasted a whole pint of genuine Teabagger venom on somebody that wasn't even the Evil One? That's not fair, but what can you expect from that ebony vixen daughter of Satan.

Comments are closed.