According to the people speaking Elvish in this European television broadcast, shocking audio from a Prince concert in 1998 proves the Minneapolis badass knew years in advance that Osama bin Laden would “bomb” (hip hop for “use passenger jets as missiles”) the United States in 2001. Why won’t the Tea Party distance itself from Prince?
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Sign O' The Times….
At least we didn't get "Purple Rained!"
Or golden showered.
Or Diamond & Pearl-necklaced.
Or Chocolate Rained.
Actually, we did. It's called "trickle down".
The day formerly known as September, 11th: Never Forget
The terror-artist formerly known as TAFKAP.
Tonight I'm gonna party with a September tenth mindset.
When Prince says, "I got to get ready for the bomb," I think he's referring to Graffiti Bridge.
I thought the Gap Band did "You Dropped the Bomb On Me."
They did. Watch the video. It features stock footage of WWII aircraft and men dancing in camos.
It will make you gay for 3 minutes.
Yes, he knew. He wanted to send in special forces military personnel, the Raspberry Berets to stop them.
The kind you find in a second-hand store?
Nearly 3,000 Pop Lives were lost in the attacks….
Will they die 4 U?
What you puttin' in yo nose?
No, Prince predicted that the party would be over, out of time when it became two thousand zero zero, at the end of nineteen ninety-nine. Jeez, doesn't anyone know the classics any more?
Ken was dreaming when he wrote this, forgive him if it went astray.
Geez, you sound just like my mother. She's never satisfied.
Hell, Arthur C. Clarke knew 30 years beforehand — the large, black rectangular monoliths inciting tool-use in proto-humans is exactly parallel to the WTC causing al-Qaida to attack it with airplanes. Dude's got some explaining to do.
Controversy!
Raspberry Beret was a thinly-veiled critique of globalization and the concentration of wealth via currency-market manipulations. WAKE UP, AMERICA!!
So does this mean that Under the Cherry Moon is not actually about what I thought it was about?
To be fair, it made more sense than Graffiti Bridge. Plus: Wrecka Sto.
Prince is from… [cue ominous music] Minnesota. And we know what else comes from. ..Minnesota.
Well on one hand you've got
– Norm Coleman
– Michele Bachmann
– Marcus Bachmann
– Jesse Ventura
– TAFKA T-Paw
But on the other hand there's
– Al Franken
– Lizard People
– Garrison Keillor
Me!
"Why don't you purify yourself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka."
Or Lake Piscacadawadaquoddymoggin.
Steers? Or the other one?
And all the while his guitar gently weeped.
THANKS!!! That was fantastic!
I hope Darling Nikki got out OK…
Sorry to see the Wonkette Content Farm succumb to the 9/11 nostalgia temptation.
Yeah, we'll make *sure* not to note the ENTIRE COUNTRY GOING INSANE for the 9/11 anniversary. We *never* pay any attention to Americans going insane.
Ha ha ha, so meta. Have you heard? CNBC said there’s a squirrel outside the window!
Are the Wonkette supersleuths digging in to find that the Saudi Princes were in on 9/11 all the way up to the agals that hold the keffiyehs on their amoral heads? Y'all aren't gonna let some W-bama redaction get in your way are ya?
I'm just glad the anniversary itself is on a Sunday; it'll be easier to ignore that way.
I can't wait to see what gifts I get this year.
How about a crying eagle on black velvet? We'll probably see a lot more of those; but won't get to hear what it sounds like when doves cry.
or a commemorative coin?
Every year, I face the stronger and stronger urge to write on my facebook or twitter, "HAPPY 9/11, EVERYBODY!"
But, it ends up, one of my friends had an actual nervous breakdown over it, so doing so wouldn't go over too well with my friends and might be slightly less funny because of that. Slightly.
mj,
♪ ♫ I know it's been said many times, in many ways…
Merry 9/11 to you.♪ ♫
And no extra "God Bless America" during the baseball games. (Yes, they still do this every Sunday, instead of the hallowed hymn, "Take Me Out to the Ballgame".) As Tom Hanks said, "There's no praying in baseball, or something!"
Oh yeah, they sang that at the last baseball game I attended (which is not something I do often) and I was confused and, as an atheist, somewhat offended. I made a point not to sing along.
How did the people sitting around you respond:
(1) "Say, I noticed you failed to join in the collective singing a Broadway show tune that has become our ex officio national anthem. Is it because you don't think the Almighty has chosen to bless one national unit above another? Or perhaps you are a bit skeptical about the entire idea of a supreme being. I'd like to hear more about your views in any case."
(2) "Get the fuck outahere, you hippie fag pinko peace creep!"
Yeah, I fucking hate that. If it were America the Beautiful, it wouldn't be so bad. It also comes at the time right before beer sales end, so it's doubly bad.
I was sick of this quasi-naustalgia fest 3 weeks ago. Can you imagine the moments of silence and "where were you?" bombardment that is yet to come?
I am likely to commit violence if exposed to yet more self-indulgent navel-gazing from some file clerk in Nebraska who recounts the deep personal suffering she endured while watching the towers fall on the office conference room television.
I will nevar forgit…I was sleeping the morning away, about to go down to mexico to buy more pills, when I heard the news. I had to skip the pills cuz the border got closed, and go out and get drunk instead.
Some asshole in the bar was babbling about how we deserved it, and I sat there contemplating breaking my pint glass and stabbing him in the neck with it.
That night, a DJ refused my request to play "killing an arab." must not have been a Cure fan.
Needless to say, I was in rehab three months to the day after 9/11.
Camus, after all, was French.
9/11 nostalgia? I'm drowning in Prince nostalgia here, it seems.
How could the Tea Party distance themselves from Prince?
I hear you can get pretty far in a little red Corvette.
Prince was taken away in custody while trying to board a United Airlines jet in Minneapolis. A security scan found a lion in his pocket, reportedly "ready to roar."
Poor lion — it just wanted to be taken to "the place where your horses run free."
Well, that evidence is Gouda enough for me!
Just like the fucking teabagging Rethugs – ignore this but take "Lets Go Crazy" to the nth degree forever.
"He said how'd you like to waste some time?
And I could not resist when I saw little Rick-y grind…"
The Batdance was reason enough to send him to Gitmo.
Okay, yes. But you have to send Morris Day first, just because.
He already did the Time.
Hey, Prince was a pretty good prognosticator. Didn't he call the Y2K disaster too?
It's Prince code, ordering them to "punch a higher floor".
But the real question is, where were Wendy and Lisa?
The same place the NPG got sent to, I'm guessing.
That little Corvette was red with the blood of innocents!
But if it was "Saturday night".. I guess that makes it all right?
And this intelligence slipped by because who the fuck speaks Dutch!?
I love this story.
…but not like I love my guitar.
I am baking a twin towers cake and crashing a toy 737 into it. Too soon?
Prince also predicted the partying I would be doing in 1999. Thanks a lot, Bilderberg group!
Thanks a lot, Wonkette, I had forgotten about this wormy little grease-ball until today.
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and suggest that conversation wouldn't make anymore sense if I did speak whatever language they're using.
This is my favorite Wonkette thread ever.
Get it right!!! The Terrorist Formerly Known as Prince
Morris Day was an inside job.
LMLYP?
Little known fact: Prince's secretary's name was Osama and OBL's secretary's name was ❦.
This only proves that Dick Cheney sleeps with Prince and talks in his sleep. Yawn!
The bomb you buy at the secondhand store.
I blame Was (Not Was) based on their song "I Blew Up The United States"! (I'm actually surprised this one doesn't get mentioned more in conspiracy theories. It even has lines about blowing up the Statue of Liberty.)
Sorry, what happened at the 9-11? Did they run out of Slushees?
Well, if you had said "Saudi Prince," that would be a nother thing entirely. But them Saudis are in the Oil Bidness just like W and Dicky, so they got the biggest pass ever in the history of ther world.
Osama was just getting Prince back for Under the Cherry Moon. Talk about a bomb.
I don't think anyone noticed, so I didn't have to deal with any crap.
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