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“We’ll stop you next time, Muslim Americans!” is what wingnuts in Tennessee are saying right now, because in a brave act of reason, a Rutherford County judge decided that despite the constant nagging of crazy people with an interesting perspective on America’s freedoms, he would like to continue to provide Muslims with religious freedom.

A Rutherford County judge decided to uphold his earlier decision that the Islamic Center of Murfreesboro has a right, by law, to build a bigger place of worship.

“Those who are adherents to Islam are entitled to pursue their worship in the United States just as are those who are adherents to more universally established faiths (in our community),” ruled Chancellor Robert Corlew III.

Opponents of the mosque had asked Corlew to reconsider the decision he made in May, which was that the 17 plaintiffs suing Rutherford County government can only challenge whether an open meeting violation occurred over the mosque’s approval.

Hooray for that, but oh, of course:

Corlew’s latest ruling reiterated that Islam is a religion. Brandon disagreed with that.

“Chancellor Corlew seems to go on and on that it’s been decided that Islam is a religion, and we take issue with that,” Brandon said. “There’s no proof in this case that Islam is a religion. There is no case law or code that Islam is a religion.”

Ah, that is more like it. [Tennessean]

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  • OzoneTom

    Sure they can practice religion.

    As long as it is Christianity.

    • arihaya

      it reminds me to old Colbert joke:

      "Everyone has the right to their own religion — be you Hindu, Jewish, or Muslim, I believe there are infinite paths to accepting Jesus Christ as your personal savior..'

    • Negropolis

      And so long as it's Southern Baptistry or Methodism.

      • GhostBuggy

        I have this pal that's really Catholic and really conservative. I've tried to explain to him that, if the religious right in this country could really get what it wants, he and his fellow papists would be in the camps with the rest of us godless heathens. He won't listen.

  • MichelesPantalones

    Duh, WUT? WTF does this birdbrain mean, "Islam is not a religion"? So, exactly what IS it then? Chopped LIVER?

  • SayItWithWookies

    Oh grerat — what's gonna happen to this country if everyone's allowed to practice the religion of their choice?

  • Barb

    Muslims in Tennessee?
    Assalam Alaiykum ya'll

    • Seriously… next you'll be telling me that there are brown people who live in the midwest

    • SayItWithWookies

      The hardest part about being a Tennessee Muslim? Climbing down from the deer stand five times a day to pray.

      • littlebigdaddy

        I imagine finding halal bbq is not that easy either.

      • chascates

        Plus the lack of country songs sang in Arabic.

        • bagofmice

          Depends on the country.

      • Negropolis

        You want to know the hardest part of being a Muslim in Oklahoma? Toby Keith.

  • MittsHairHelmet

    This activist judge clearly doesn't understand the founders' intent.

    • bagofmice

      They say Jefferson found 'er in tent, along with a few other things.

      (ok, that was bad)

      • Lascauxcaveman

        That whole Revolutionary War Army camp experience? That was intense.

  • nounverb911

    Teabaggers demand a new amendment banning freedom of religion (except theirs) in 3…2…

    • MichelesPantalones

      All three of them.

      • SorosBot

        Three? There's the true religion, then varying degrees; heretical non-Baptist Protestants, Papists, then Jews and other heathens.

        • MichelesPantalones

          Er, no. I was referring to the three, as in, remaining Teabaggers; their popularity is dropping like a stone, and attendance and identification with them is dropping off accordingly. At least among the sane, and nonpoliticians.

          • But organized, "official" teabagism and tea bag politicians will be propped up by the monied interests, so long as they can control them.

          • MichelesPantalones

            They didn't do so good at controlling them during the debt debate. And Hopey has figured out how to split them like kindling. I look forward to their coming demise as a movement.

        • finallyhappy

          So before the invention of race as a way to divide and demean people, there were the Christians- I guess only Catholics at that time and then the heathens(Jews &Muslims &Hindus- oh, my!)

    • bagofmice

      One amendment to ban polytheism, and in the constitution bind them.

    • tcaalaw

      Actually, some of them have already proposed a constitutional amendment that would make an exception to the First Amendment to allow Islam to be banned: http://www.faithfreedom.org/articles/op-ed/propos

      • Swampgas_Man

        My browser refused to open that link. Good going, Google Chrome.

  • SexySmurf

    Theres no proof in this case that Islam is a religion. There is no case law or code that Islam is a religion.

    According to the IRS it is.

    • MichelesPantalones

      You know, according to, I don't know, just about every dictionary, encyclopedia, religious authority, and what-all, it is. I mean, these people are mind-numbingly dumb.

    • bagofmice

      So I guess you don't gotta have faith…

      • poncho_pilot

        not according to the Book Of Wham George Michael.

    • Negropolis

      And, well, nearly 2,000 years of religious tradition and it's 1.5 billion adherents. You know, just that. lol

    • savethispatient

      Well, according to the teabaggers' bible, Islam is merely a series of laws meant to bring down the American way of life…. and so is the IRS.

    • chicken_thief

      But the IRS is unconstitutional, so it don't count.

    • ph7

      "Presidents as far back as Lincoln and Jefferson, and as recent as President George W. Bush, have publicly recognized Islam as one of the world's largest religions," U.S. Attorney Jerry Martin stated in a press conference on Monday.

      "The federal government cited Thomas Jefferson in their press conference, and he owned slaves," Brandon asserted to Commissioner Gary Farley. "Is that who they want to cite as an authority?" .

      A wingnut telling us that we can ignore the constitutional principles of any Founding Father who owned slaves? Time to check if my cat is sleeping with my dog.

      • GunToting[Redacted]

        It's a perfect Möbius strip of wingnuttery.

  • Mahousu

    "There is no case law or code that Islam is a religion.”

    I don't know; seems like plenty of coded language is used to refer to Muslims.

  • DoktorThompson

    The judge's face is priceless. "I'm surrounded by morons."

    • MissusBarry

      I was making the same face. Of all the ret@rded crap of the haters of all things not white bread and jeebus, that quote at the end left me dumbstruck.

    • HeadsIWin

      those be morans, boy.

  • In other news:

    Obama bows to Boehner; jobs speech will be Sept. 8

    In a retreat after an hours-long test of wills Wednesday, President Barack Obama agreed to deliver an address on jobs and the economy to a joint session of Congress on Sept. 8, yielding to House Speaker John Boehner, who had balked at Obama's request for a Sept. 7 speech.

    You could knock me over with a feather.
    ~

    • nounverb911

      Maybe Bachmannn will lend Obama her titanium backbone one of these days.

    • SorosBot

      And so he's fucking with football instead; would have been better to move it up a day. Although it probably is a good idea; the more people see the Republican debates, the better his reelection chances become.

      • Radiotherapy®

        Now Barry will be available join us in the liveblogging of the clown car race?

    • Radiotherapy®

      You are looking at this the wrong way. Chancellor Obama is so strong and sturdy that he will go up against the NFL opener. Amirite? Right? Maybe? C'mon, he would never back down, cave or be morally weak?!? Please god this has to be the answer. ;..(

    • LetUsBray

      Man, I would not have guessed on election day '08 that the headline I'd grow most sick of would be:

      "President Kneels Before Weepy, Orange Zod"

  • SudsMcKenzie

    I'm pretty sure Brandon is right, I think "Islam" was that terrible movie with Dustin Hoffman and Warren Beatty.

  • It wasn't all that long ago when the RC Church thought the various strains of the protestant church weren't a real religion.

    Note to Botards: the only real religion of US America is money.

    • DoktorThompson

      And the only real sin in US America is not having money.

    • Negropolis

      And to this day many Evangelical denominations don't think Roman Catholics are Christians, and America has a long history until very recently of oppressing Catholics. So, yeah. I wonder when Catholics will get a slur like "papist" to use on their very own?

  • littlebigdaddy

    Jeez, every Super 8 and Motel 6 in Rutherford County will close down if they kick out the Mooselimbs.

  • arihaya

    "“There’s no proof in this case that Islam is a religion"

    and there is no prove that Mr Brandon is sane.

    • Negropolis

      There is also no proof that Mr. Brandon isn't a Tennessee goat-fucker. 'Cause, as you know, it would be irresponsible not to speculate.

  • BarackMyWorld

    Islam isn't a religion like this lawsuit isn't moronic.

  • AlterNewt

    “There’s no proof in this case that Islam is a religion. There is no case law or code that Islam is a religion.”

    I…just… I …can't…I…arrrrrggghhhh…

    • bagofmice

      You'll just have to take it on faith.

      • chicken_thief

        I'm sure Jeebs leaked the info to someone… Michele possibly? Or Rick Perry – he and the Lawd seem really tight these days.

      • DashboardBuddha

        Well done.

    • DashboardBuddha

      I know, right? The jaw engages, but the words don't come out. The stupidity is breathtaking.

      • AlterNewt

        These people are impossible to satirize.

        (Thanks, BTW)

  • SudsMcKenzie

    Hey, its not like these "Islam" people wrote down any "religious" things, in say a book or anything.

    • AlterNewt

      Only in that un-Amerkin funny-writin'.

  • Probably a Catholic or Mormon Judge. They ain't Christians either.

  • Time for the Pastafarians to draw up plans and start raising funds for construction of the Crystal Colander.

    • finallyhappy

      Ramen, Brother, Ramen. May you and yours be touched by her Noodly Appendage!

      • GunToting[Redacted]

        Pastify!

  • glamourdammerung

    "There is no case law or code that Islam is a religion.”

    Spoken like a true advocate of "small government and personal freedom".

  • Guppy06

    Islam hasn't been established as a religion.

    • bagofmice

      Well, that makes Sharia kind of a silly concern.

  • As an agnostic, I feel it's my job to protect the thousands of denominations of Christians from strangling each other in the streets by keeping any of them from getting a foot in the door of the Government.

  • chascates

    What 'Brandon' meant obviously is that there is no proof that Mohammed existed or that there is a long tradition of Islam, unlike the incontrovertible proof of the existence of our Blessed Savior, who was born on December 25th, year 0, and was visited by three wise asses or whatever.

    Plus, Jesus was a handsome, yet soulful-looking white man with blue eyes. Not like those camel jockeys.

    • SorosBot

      Hey now, we all know the Jesus story is true, because a collection of stories written decades after the fact and edited by the rulers of Rome centuries later say so. Ignore the complete lack of actual corroborating documentation of his existence until over a generation after he was supposed to have died.

      • not that Dewey

        We also know that there was no year 0. If you'll recall, we had to go through that Millenium bullshit for like three years in a row because Matt Lauer, Harry Smith and George Stephanopoulos's respective morning shows could not agree on when centuries or millenia begin or end.

        • PubOption

          Pol pot made sure there was a year zero.

          • BaldarTFlagass

            And Ray Milland and Frankie Avalon panicked therein.

          • not that Dewey

            That looks awesome.

  • pinkocommi

    “There’s no proof in this case that Islam is a religion. There is no case law or code that Islam is a religion.”

    Right-wing idiocy on the other hand…. an abundance of proof that it is a religion. Unfortunately.

  • zhubajie

    Are Southern Baptists are real religion?

  • SorosBot

    OK, now this is completely O/T, but why the fuck is Cottonelle running ads trying to convince us that it's somehow rude to store toilet paper the way everybody does and always has, but instead we need to keep it covered in some stupid cozy thing?

    • poncho_pilot

      to make money off of our insecurities. in related news, my wife told me she saw a woman who was covering up her maxi-pads with an ad paper until she got to the register at Walgreens this morning.

    • finallyhappy

      Hey, are you dissing the Crocheted and Knitted Poodles everyone I knew had on the back of the toilet??? maybe you just didn't know that strangely cylindrical body hid a roll of TP?

      • Seriously. Crocheted "skirts" in pastel colors with a half-sawn-off Barbie® knockoff inserted in top like a hollowed b-day cake tier whose pop-out bimbo got stuck mid-"Surprise…"

  • DahBoner

    To the moon, Akbar!

  • Negropolis

    Needz moar Scopes Monkey Trial.

    Seriously, though, I feel a bit defeated that this even had to be reaffirmed. We don't have a cut-copy-paste Constitution. You can't just ignore or take out the parts that you don't like.

    • BarackMyWorld

      Does "pretend it means something else entirely" count?

    • Radiotherapy®

      “There’s no proof in this case that evolution is a theory."

  • poncho_pilot

    i wish any of this nonsense surprised me but i feel like i've seen it so many times before…
    http://www.freedomforum.org/templates/document.as

    "If other groups want to pray that way, let them put their Buddhas or their wooden statues up and there and pray to their dead gods."

  • poorgradstudent

    “There’s no proof in this case that Islam is a religion. There is no case law or code that Islam is a religion.”

    It's been all downhill since conservatives discovered postmodernism.

  • Wasn't there a time in this country when you could be involuntarily committed to an insane asylum? I'm not saying those days were better. But maybe there was more incentive to not say crazy shit.

  • ttommyunger

    "There is also nothing in the Statute Books about Gravity, either" he expounded authoritatively, "I am being held on Earth by my own iron will alone!" With that, he put on his tinfoil hat, touched his nose with his left index finger and left the premises.

  • mavenmaven

    Well, we all know how Jesus wrassled with alligators and spoke in tongues, so we know that that's a legitimate religion.

  • Come here a minute

    The judge did not go as far as permitting Islam to be practiced during a Republican debate, that would have been unconstitutional.

  • Redhead

    “Chancellor Corlew seems to go on and on that it’s been decided that Islam is a religion, and we take issue with that,” Brandon said. “There’s no proof in this case that Islam is a religion. There is no case law or code that Islam is a religion.”

    Personally, there are several "churches" that claim to be "Christian" around here, but I feel that there's no proof that they're Christian, or that their form of Christianity is a religion (never proven! though I'm pretty sure they're cults). So yeah, down with the building and your sharia law, move away from me, all that.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    When I was in the Navy, I invented my own religion in the hopes of getting something besides fish served on the messdecks on Fridays (the Catholic Filipino messcooks who made the menu apparently had not been informed of Vatican II).
    It was the Holy Order of the Golden Arches, and our dietary requirements were cheeseburgers on Fridays.

    Hail Ronald
    Full of Mayo
    The Big Mac is with me
    Blessed are the holy McFries
    Blessed is the fruit of the Hot Apple Pies.
    Mayor McCheese
    Keeper of the Secret Sauce
    Keep warm our dinners
    Now and until the hour of the Thick Frosty Shakes.
    Mm-mmm.

  • chicken_thief

    I don't know how old Corlew is or the state of his health, but I wish I was the beneficiary of his life insurance. I could use a windfall here in the near future….

  • friendlyskies

    Well, at least they have something to blame for this season's predictably crap performance from the Vols. "Tennessee turned it's [sic] back on Jesus, and Jesus turned His back on UT. REPENT."

  • Troglodeity

    "Theres no proof in this case that Christianity is a religion. There is no case law or code that Christianity is a religion." – The Pharisees' opening statement to Pontius Pilate

  • From the look on the face of Chancellor Robert Corlew III, he is about five seconds from asking the plaintiff's counsel, "Son, you did go to law school, didn't you?'

  • SilverTsunami

    Well, Brandon has a point, because apparently only a few fashion designers in Paris and New York are Muslin and. . . oh, wait, if you spell it correctly, it looks like about 1.6 billion people are Muslims. Only about 23% of the world's population, then, not really a universally recognized faith.

  • LowProfileinGA

    Muslims won a similar struggle in Lilburn GA. City Council caved this week; the Justice Dept. has now filed a complaint against the city for violation of the "Religious Land Use and Institutionalized Persons Act of 2000".
    http://www.11alive.com/news/article/203633/40/LIL

    But Hindus seem to be OK – for now at least. An incredibly beautiful Hindu temple stands only a few miles away.

    "The BAPS Shri Swaminarayan Mandir Atlanta is the sixth BAPS traditional Hindu stone temple built outside of India. It is also the largest Hindu temple of its kind outside of India. It is currently open to the public. The 32000 sqft temple, officially called the Shri Swaminarayan Mandir, sits on 30 acre. With hand-carved stone spires that tower 75 ft, it is the tallest building in Lilburn, Georgia"
    http://www.swaminarayan.org/globalnetwork/america

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