Here's an important legal advisory for Florida residents the rest of us can laugh at: it is apparently unlawful in the state of Florida to shack up with a sexytime partner outside of wedlock, if you are straight. Homo sex does not count as real sex in Florida, so teh gayz are in the clear on this one, but for all you other people: get hitched or else! The law is some archaic 19th-century leftover scribbled on a scrap of crusty snot rag probably used by one of the Founding Fathers, i.e. SACRED, so no one has bothered until now to try to repeal it. But who is trying to axe murder family values this time if the homo agenda warriors have no reason to care? The answer is weird!
The Sun Sentinal reports:
"Cohabitation" of unmarried people is currently a second-degree misdemeanor, punishable by $500 or up to 60 days in jail. The same penalty applies to cheating husbands and wives — though only to opposite-sex couples.
The laws have been on the books since the late 1800s, but are rarely enforced. In 2006, though, a Jacksonville woman did take advantage of the law and have her husband arrested for cheating, according to a news report. (It's not clear how the case came out.)
Now, Rep. Ritch Workman, R-Melbourne, is on a mission to repeal the statutes penalizing adultery and cohabitation, as well as other laws he finds outdated, like a requirement that all bicycle riders keep one hand on the handle bars. He filed adultery the bill last week — it's HB 4021 — though he hasn't returned phone calls about it for the past two days.
WOAH. A Florida Republican who hates family values? What's next, free dildos for third-graders? [ Sun Sentinel ]
Hands on the handlebars, so no problem. Unless he left his helmet home...
Actually, the fine ones are $500 a night.