Related video

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

132 comments

    1. DahBoner

      Well, no wonder! This twit is from "Christine OD".

      Guess she musta got ahold of some bad stuff….

    1. Biel_ze_Bubba

      Just a momentary slip of her tinfoil hat, and all these instructions from space start pouring ouf of the alien chip inside her head.

      I'm sure she's fine now, and back to making no sense whatsoever.

  1. ManchuCandidate

    Craven mind and hairy lips
    Dollar signs on her finger tips
    Shrieking long into the night
    She’s a dumbass loser on an endless grift
    Wooo hooo witchy woman, see how
    Much she lies
    Woo hoo witchy woman she gone
    Done and ass texted herself

    1. Lascauxcaveman

      LOL, that's where all the campaign funds went: cat food, cat litter and an iPhone, which she bought at the full retail price.

  2. nappyduggs

    Holy Johnny 5, that is one hell of a short circuit, looks like!
    "Xtine….winding….dowwwwwnnnnn….

  3. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    I don't know. Some of that looks like it could be Russian. Could it be that she has been a commie sleeper all along, and that Putin has finally put her into action?

    1. SorosBot

      Even worse, there's some upside-down question marks and exclamation points in there, as used in Spanish. Could she be a sekrit illegal Mexican?

    2. Dr_Zoidberg

      Now, you know we don't care about the Commies! Say it looks like some kind of secret Mooslim speech, and you got something.

    3. mumbly_joe

      Y'know, I floated this theory a while back, last year, here and here.

      Point being, it's pretty clear that, yes, the main point of Twitter is to be a numbers station for commie spies and O'Donnell is one there I said it.

    1. tribbzthesquidz

      Hitachi not compatible with Apple. No app for that. Plus, if Christine could orgasm, we wouldn't be talking about any of this.

  4. HelmutNewton

    English translation: "Double, double toil and trouble! Fire burn, and caldron bubble! Those who are dumb enough to follow my Tweets, buy my book or I'll eat your feets!"

  5. Mumbletypeg

    to be fair… tweep apnea medication has been known to have bizarre side effects such as tweeptalking..

    * I'm compelled to refer to it as tweeping = tweet + 'cheep'.. something about XO'D's expression makes me think of a young chicklet

  6. FlownOver

    Jeez, doncha have a Rosetta stone?

    The translation is:

    When I look out my window,
    Many sights to see.
    And when I look in my window,
    So many different people to be
    That it's strange, so strange.
    You've got to pick up every stitch…

  7. flamingpdog

    That's a direct quote from one of Sarah Palin's testimonies at her church in Wasilla. Plagiarism can now be added to Xine's rap sheet!

  8. weejee

    Was ist mit dem umlats Xtine? And lotsa phi, Φ. Fee, phi, fo, fum??? Or is it the mathsciences like angles, or fugacity, or potential. Naaa on that for sure.

    My guess it's what Xtine gets for texting while having a special moment with her phone in vibrate mode.

  9. flamingpdog

    She twittered not too long ago that she was at Channel 9News studios in Denver. Mebbe this twitter is her allergic reaction to the lamestream media.

  10. V572 T-Blow

    Well I scanned the image into Acrobat and OCRed it so translate.google.com could read it. It said it had detected Filipino (really!) and gave this "English" translation:

    <l> ARAAKISCiKYsABGGKaiKIAhQKAP § N § § <l> eAUMAfaKCWSNOABiAhQKA oCAdCY § § IA YsALiF NMSeAKlAZsAbii.AAbSAKANifiCeiKIAdKCeeCNOSNOAZsAbeCmKYA
    fGQ YKN KIK I. …

    Happy to help!

    1. Lascauxcaveman

      I asked my Filipino friends if I could join them at the Filipino Culture Night at the community center but they wouldn't let me tag alog.

  11. Dudleydidwrong

    After a really careful look I think that she tweeted her pharmacy that she was out of KY lube. The last line clearly reads:

    "KY is empty and the friction is too hot. Please send new supply immediately."

    1. mumbly_joe

      Upfisted for Homestuck. Being on a month-long hiatus, Wonkete is down to my only internet addiction at the moment. There's a couple of fans other floating around here, too (NEEEEERDS!!!)

  12. BarackMyWorld

    Twitter followers are just rude for expecting actual words in her posts. That's not what she agreed to tweet about.

  13. johnnyzhivago

    OT – but the Zhivago Bunker/Compound just returned to "the Grid" – after 3 days without power here in Western Uflarkistan (I mean New Jersey). Three days of kids (off from school) screaming for cable TV and Internet access (their smartphones not enough to provide entertainment). Your faithful commenter faithfully manned the generator, just like they did in Baghdad. We saved lots on our electric bill this month – offset by $20 a day in gasoline to power the generator.

    Mrs. Zhivago on a business trip, youngest off to reeducation at a neighbors house (that has power), the oldest and I shall be sitting down to one more meal of hot dogs and hobo beans, as we rehearse for the future post apocalypic world that is coming soon!!!!

    Dignity Indeed!!!!

  14. MissTaken

    First, who the fuck are these 100+ people who retweeted this?

    Second, I like the … at the end. It really sums up the tweet nicely.

    1. mumbly_joe

      Wait, I've seen this movie before. If you get this tweet, then in seven days Christine O'Donnell's pudenda comes out of the computer screen and you die, unless you retweet it to someone else, first. It adds that extra touch of personal horror to the story, you see.

        1. James Michael Curley

          This is what is great about Wonkette. At my advanced age, only here do I learn new legitimate words for female parts. And I have owned several females over the years but their pudenda never needed changing.

          1. James Michael Curley

            I tried leasing but it was high maintenance, the finance fees were outrageous and they really soak you if you return them with high mileage.

  15. KeepFnThatChicken

    Would you like a cup of glossolalia to accompany your eschatology and wash down that soteriology?

  16. DashboardBuddha

    Wow…just wow. Too bad I'm out of Pud of Newt or I'd give that demonic recipe a spin.

  17. Beowoof

    I see she has been watching the current season of True Blood and she thinks its a documentary.

  18. Negropolis

    It's a spell! We've been bewitched! Quick, what's the counterspell?

    I know that Delawarean's have an accent, but this is straight up, authentic Delmarvan Gibberish.

  19. randcoolcatdaddy

    She was just capturing the collective gurgle of the American voter as the implications of the available candidates for 2012 have sunk in….

  20. user-of-owls

    An accent aigu here, a tilde there…no harm done. But you start throwing down with the umlauts, baby, and someone gonna bleed bad.

  21. SilverTsunami

    Christine, I've told you, never do this incantation during a new moon. When will you learn?

  22. danny6114

    O'Dumbbell is using an ancient curse on Palin for getting her booted from the Iowa shindig, or, she's praying to the witch gods for better book sales.

Comments are closed.