it's not like jesus went around just talking to everyone, god.Iowa Republicans have belatedly grown as tired of walking prescription overdose Michele Bachmann as the rest of Reality, only this time not for her acutely lunatic viewpoints and constant factual misrepresentations, but because she chronically shows up late to all of her scheduled events, refuses to mingle with the commoners or take their questions and then runs and hides in the cool darkness of her tour bus like some low-level Taliban bureaucrat retiring to his cave to sift through the opium stash in the medicine box before he says a prayer and checks out for a few hours. What were we talking about again? MICHELE BACHMANN IS INSANE, and a two-bit theocrat. There we go. Let’s hear from her former fans!

From some Fox News thing, somewhere:

Can the “Barack Obama rock star crap.”

That comes from Judd Saul, who helped organize the Blackhawk County Lincoln Day Dinner. The fundraiser, which was the day after the Straw Poll, was Texas Governor Rick Perry’s first presidential campaign event in Iowa.

It was held in Waterloo, a place where she is no stranger. Bachmann proudly states she is from Waterloo and It is also where she officially launched her White House bid.

But Saul says Bachmann’s behavior at the dinner left folks “kinda pissed.”

“(Perry) sat with people, talked with people. (Bachmann) acted like a rock star, refused to eat dinner with us,”he said. “If Michele Bachmann is the hometown girl, from Waterloo, she should dine with us.”

Instead, Saul points out Bachmann spent time on her campaign bus, only entering for her turn to speak at the event after she was introduced twice.

Out in Western Iowa, the chairman of the Pottawattamie County Republican Party, Jeff Jorgenson tells Fox News,   “(Bachmann) hasn’t been making herself available…as far as retail politics is concerned, she’s got a long way to go.”

In large part, Republican ire at Bachmann comes because she is seen as not fully embracing the ‘”rules” of Iowa campaigning.

Unlike most other states, Iowans expect candidates, even ones for ‘leader of the Free World’, to linger at events to talk with every person left in the room. Presidential hopefuls are also expected to take questions from not only the local media, but also everyday Iowans.

Everyone hates Michele Bachmann because she is a greedy, self-serving egomaniac, the end. [OH FINE WHATEVER Fox News]

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  • Beowoof

    Jesus I have been sick of that for years now.

  • Indiepalin

    For MIchele Bachmann to bounce back as the people's choice, there's only one choice: Xanax, early and often.

  • chascates

    Trust me; you wouldn't enjoy dinner with Michele Bachmann.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      I might. I'm extremely hard of hearing. What's on the menu? Any microbrews on tap?

      • chascates

        Well, if you like your women like I like my coffee: bitter and expensive.

        • Radiotherapy®

          The Last Supper.

        • Steverino247

          Ground up and in the freezer?

  • Jason_inthe_Peg

    Stop picking on Michele!

    Jesus may have hung out with prostitutes and lepers but not even he would mingle with Iowa republicans.

    • Dashboard_Jesus

      amen brother, I would gladly have dinner with the whore of Babylon as long as we're doin' some 'sexual healing' (personally I'd like to de-gay her, with buttsecks of course)…but I draw the line at dining with the hypocritical, douchebag, phony Xtain Pharisees, those bastards have a *special* place in hell reserved just for them!

  • metamarcisf

    For Michele Bachmann to bounce back as the choice of the common man, there's really only one avenue: Alprazolam, early and often.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    In my high school days, this specimen would be known as "Stuck-Up Bitch."

    • Crank_Tango

      and to think, Palin hasn't even deigned to throw her tiara into the ring yet.

      • MichelesPantalones

        Do you know if the dingalings over at C4P are glorying in Michele's downfall yet?

  • Barb

    Michele is afraid that someone else is going to ask the "submissive wife" question again. Just answer the damn question! "I'm not, but Marcus is."

    • subsum

      "Stand by your man. Give him two arms to cling to and something warm to come to…" (that's for Marcus, actually.)

    • Guppy06

      Marcus hasn't given her permission to answer that question yet.

  • OC_Surf_Serf

    Acted like a rock star…is a greedy, self-serving egomaniac…yet hides in her tour bus.

    Bachmann is like an indoor Palin…

    • Streiffert

      Can you flush an indoor Palin?

      • NorthStarSpanx

        It's curious that Palin's supporters want Sarah to have the luxury of private jets (for her bus tour) so that she won't be held up or bothered by the sweaty masses in her celebrity, but Bachmann?

        They want that whack-job to break bread with them and talk about how many babies each of her 23 foster daughters had because of her?

    • Guppy06

      "Use your indoor screech!"

  • GregComlish

    Michele could learn from her husband. Marcus was very forward with all the stragglers at the last campaign stop. He even gave me a free back massage.

    • MichelesPantalones

      Um … just what area of the back are we discussing here?

  • BaldarTFlagass

    "chronically shows up late to all of her scheduled events, refuses to mingle with the commoners or take their questions and then runs and hides in the cool darkness of her tour bus"

    Michele is Axl Rose!!!

    • "Are you ready to, um, rock?!"

    • Callyson

      Add the drugs she takes and she could be Lindsey Lohan.

      • Mahousu

        Except not quite as deep a thinker.

  • jjdaddyo

    People in Iowa and NH have this idea that presidential candidates should give them all back rubs to get their vote.

    • Jukesgrrl

      The back rub is just for primaries. It's a warm-up to the general.

      • jjdaddyo

        No one gives a shit about Iowa and NH in the general election, that why they make sure to get their hot towels and blow jobs now.

      • jjdaddyo

        No one gives a shit about Iowa and NH in the general election, that's why they make sure to get their hot towels and blow jobs now.

  • mavenmaven

    Don't worry, Marcus will straighten them out.

  • bureaucrap

    She should just adopt the Paul Ryan methodology: No check ($1000 or above), no talk. I'm sure the Iowa GOP would respect her for that.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      That's the kind of "retail politics" the GOP goes for.

      They're even bigger fans of Perry's wholesale politics.

  • Thurman Munster IV

    Give her a break. Have you seen how and what Iowans eat?

    • MichelesPantalones

      No, actually. Perhaps you could enlighten us? What is it, like, meat and potatoes?

      • zhubajie

        This time of year, probably corn on the cob.

        • MichelesPantalones

          Oh, yeah, **corn dogs**.

          • zhubajie

            No, no, real steamed sweet corn, with melted butter and salt.Zhu Bajie, Iowegian

          • MichelesPantalones

            Zhen de ma? Fresh from the fields, ma?

            Hen hao chi de.

          • zhubajie


  • SexySmurf

    If you think that's bad, Marcus spent half the dinner in the men's room and the other half asking everyone if they have any Scope.

    • jus_wonderin

      Oh, that wasn't coconut from the dessert???

    • MichelesPantalones

      Really, Marcus is just *such* a dickbreath.

  • widestanceshakedown

    Why hang out with plains folk when she can stay in the valley of the dolls?

    • jus_wonderin

      That is true. Instead of a daily reminder pill box, her's is linked in to the World Time Server with a quarter hour alarm.

    • "Welcome to the Dollhouse", starring Marcus Bachmann.

      Depressing, and and an analogue the difficulties of our poor Marcus.


      Also take note that sentence 2 includes the words "anal" and "Marcus."

  • SorosBot

    God, Iowa and New Hampshire voters are entitled pricks. You know how many times I've spoken to a Presidential candidate? None. (Well I've spoken to Obama, but that was back when he was running for State Senate, a slightly different gig).

    • I met Jimmy Carter, but it was after he was president. I guess that doesn't count.

      • Jimmy Carter stayed in a motel nearby while on a fishing trip, and all I wanted was, to ask him for an autograph, all I got was a gun shoved in my face, and told to move along. Worked for me.

        • This was at a trade show in Atlanta, if I recall. Used to meet a lot of famous people at these things in Europe, but he's the only real celebrity (excepting CEO's) I ever recall who walked around the floor in the USA. Of course he probably had nothing else to do. (And no, this wasn't the adult film industry show, we're talking about some stupid telecom event)

    • MissTaken

      I went to a campaign event for Nader back in 2000 (didn't vote for him, don't blame me for Bush!). I sat probably 50 rows back and was super-excited to actually be in the same room as an actual Presidential candidate.

      The idea of speaking to one directly is crazy to me.

    • Steverino247

      I infiltrated Pat Robertson's campaign in '88. Those fuckers were scary!

      • KarenJ503

        If we'd only known…

        Could have strangled the whole dominionist/theocracy movement in its cradle then = none of this Perry/Bachmann/Palin/Santorum crap now, nor the lame attempts by Romney/Huntsman to dangle on their crazy coattails.

        • Steverino247

          You're not going to strangle that bullshit because we have this rule in America that you have to be polite to most stupid fucking theological idea out there. If we were able to ridicule these fuckers and not have it thought to be "bad form" then maybe. As long as religion commands respect, we're fucked.

    • MichelesPantalones

      What was he like, back then?

  • "Unlike most other states, Iowans expect candidates, even ones for ‘leader of the Free World’, to linger at events to talk with every person left in the room"

    Could Iowa kindly shove itself up it's own ass???

    • MichelesPantalones

      Iowa has, what, less than 10% of the nation's population? NC and NH probably run the same numbers. We should end this stupid primary system, and just let all the hawgs run for the trough at the same time. Be worth it just to end the dickishness of these hayseed fucks.

  • Buzz Feedback

    I'm not sure what I hate more. Shelly or these fukkers from Iowa who want everybody to kiss the hem of their overalls.

  • V572 T-Blow

    Plus I read somewhere* Miche1e wore panty hose with those awful strappy sandals. Which makes you wonder: how did the writer know she wasn't wearing a garter belt and thigh-highs?

    Okay, in fairness we have to talk about the men candidates the same way. Perry's boot-fetish collection has gotten plenty of electrons and ink, and Romney was bragging about having different shirts for different days of the week.

    Ya see? It's all fair! But really…panty hose?
    *Here. Where else?

    • Crank_Tango

      Nobody tell palin yer not supposed to wear white sweats after labor day!

    • Radiotherapy®

      I know, if there's one thing I loathe it's pantyhose pussy.

      • MichelesPantalones

        Women shouldn't wear those things. It makes you smell all plastic and nylony instead of sweet, warm, buttery, yeah, brb.

    • fuflans

      seriously. Huffo is right: she wears the worst shoes.

      I could not vote for anyone who wears such crappy shoes.

      • V572 T-Blow

        Even for men, shoes = character. Brown shoes w/a black suit: horror

    • Romney was bragging about having different shirts for different days of the week.

      Brags about wearing a clean shirt every day? Romney sets the bar pretty low.

      • MichelesPantalones

        Really? Guess it's time to throw this tee in the wash then, huh?

        Hey, we're a GREEN household, dammit. Laundry once a week only. Also, showers.

    • KarenJ503

      Evidently she hasn't been getting Sarah Palin's tips on trash couture = NO PANTY HOSE with the awful strappy sandals! Go commando!

    • A different shirt for EVERY day of the week???!!!! Well dang it all now I've heard everything. Is he from Kansas City or something?

      • DahBoner


    • DahBoner

      "Romney was bragging about having different shirts for different days of the week. "

      Hand embroidered on the cuffs: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday….

    • 102415

      Hey, I'll be taking credit for seeing those awful shoes they were leaving out of the photos and making the first fashionist comment days before that Huff Po bitch. In fact I had a snotty comment about her piling on the jewelry years ago. I hatz her.

      • V572 T-Blow

        Need a link, or no credit. Firm but fair….

    • 102415
      Here. I hope I did this right.

  • Veritas78

    The one essential skill of each, any, and every politician is the ability to hide your contempt for your subjects. Woops, voters.

    Epic fail by Bachmann, eventually fatal.

    • V572 T-Blow

      Whereas Mittens is a true man of the people, beloved by all (corporations). Did you see that montage of him bitching out voters yesterday? He's used to having the motherfucking floor and everyone's attention when he wants them.

      • "Shut the fuck up or I'll outsource your votes to China!"

      • MichelesPantalones

        Didn't see that. Linky?

        • V572 T-Blow

          Rachel's got it on her blog but it's deep in a long segment.

          • MichelesPantalones

            Thank you. Will go search.

  • JoshuaNorton

    "Lie" isn't an adequate word for what Republicans say. We need a new term; I propose anti-truth, as in, "There are lies, damned lies, and Republican anti-truths."

    Like matter and anti-matter, Republicans and the truth just can't occupy the same space. What they say goes all the way through and past "untrue" into the realm of turning reality inside out, tying a knot in it, and yanking hard.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      That may explain exploding teabagger heads: truth annihalating anti-truth whenever a fact penetrate a teabagger's skull.

      Scientists continue their search for a glimpse of this rare event.

  • Surprised Iowa hasn't gone critical. You put too many radioactive egomaniacs in too small a place your get the fission goin'. Heck, they did that under a stadium in Chicago 70 years ago with some uranium, but the same fizzicks holds for this group of Rethug presidential candidates.

    • V572 T-Blow

      Here's the difference: under the stands at Stagg Field there were smart people, including Italians, present. Voilá: critical mass. All the Republicans in Iowa couldn't generate enough mental energy to light up an LED. Steve King is their intellectual stalwart, fer Jeebus' sake.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Give an Iowa teabagger a fish, and he (deep-fries it and) eats for a day.
      Teach him fission, on the other hand ….

      • MichelesPantalones

        And he takes out the entire family and a couple of small states, too.

  • DemonicRage

    Say what you will about Ms. Bachmann, at least she didn't advocate a plan in her state whereby retired teachers' lives would be insured and, when they died, the state would collect on the insurance policies, unlike a certain front-runner Republican nomination candidate who doesn't believe in global warming or in evolution.

  • “Barack Obama rock star crap.”

    Good. Will somebody tell Marcus now to cut the Cher Rock Star Crap?

    • jus_wonderin

      "Do you believe in life after love?………….love"

    • DaSandman

      Dr Bachmann, I know Cher. I have worked shows with Cher, I have toured with Cher. You sir, are no Cher. You are too fem.

      • DahBoner

        True dat!

        Needz moar dancing with sailors….

      • 102415

        I'am follow the funk.

  • Ok, here goes:

    You know who else portrayed themselves as a champion of the downtrodden, common people but demonstrated through their behavior that they actually had nothing but contempt for them?

    • metamarcisf

      Michele Bachmann?

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Johnny Rotten and the Sex Pistols?

      • Radiotherapy®

        Sid and Nancy?

        • LetUsBray

          Ron and Nancy?

    • EatsBabyDingos

      The inventor of the Men's XXXL Tangerine Thong Speedo?

      • MichelesPantalones

        Sweet jeebus! Sold only in Germany, I hope.

    • flamingpdog


      First time I got Hitler in a long time.

      And I'm not going to say who first came to mind because I don't want Chet to burst a blood vessel.

      • MichelesPantalones

        GodDAMNit, I said Hitler and I'm not backing down.

        But if you want to whisper in my ear who first came to mind, try me at

    • jus_wonderin

      Me. For my 1985 Sixth Period Students? And Keely Black who told me her father could buy me.

    • Geminisunmars

      W.C. Fields?

    • Barack Obama? (On behalf of Ken)

      • V572 T-Blow

        What do you expect from a morally weak smoker?

        • Radiotherapy®

          Jeesh, all this guy needs is another Katrina.

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush, Newt Gingrich, Mitt Romney, Rick Perry, Pat Buchanann, ect. etc. etc.

    • BarackMyWorld

      Lonesome Rhodes?

    • Paul Ryan? (credits to Weejee for link).

    • MichelesPantalones

      I'm going with Hitler this time, just because I didn't last time.

      What do I win?

    • Elmer Gantry?

  • Pragmatist2

    Wait until John Wayne Gacy comes back for a visit. That guy is totally a diva.

  • edgydrifter

    Considering she either stares intensely at some point thousands of yards away while muttering to herself or blows a rape whistle and screams for the police any time she's asked any question by anyone, Iowans should consider themselves lucky.

  • OkieDokieDog

    I blame the libural lame stream media and all those libtards making fun of the photos of 1 L Michele and Mrs. Marcus sucking on foot long corn dogs like 2 sex-starved horn dog kids.

  • philpjfry

    I don't get it. Why would anyone want to listen to crazy Michele, as if she had something to say, and why would anyone talk to the yokels from Iowa, they only matter once every four years and even then only to a few people nuts enough to want to be president. Wow that is a long sentence

  • SayItWithWookies

    Oh, those Iowans — Michele wasn't being aloof — she was just expecting the people to beg for her to come out and save America from the evil socialist and his taxin' and regulatin' ways. They probably just haven't spotted her numinous halo yet, or are too blinded by their own illusion of free will to submit to the person who takes her instructions directly from The LORD and/or Marcus. One day they will though — one day real soon.

  • Rotundo_

    Iowa and New Hampshire voters may be entitled pricks, but if a *conservative* candidate can't relate to the reliably right leaning rubes and chat them up, how can they expect to sell themselves to the rubes nationwide? In Micheles' case, I would seriously chalk it up to paranoia and phobias, cause it certainly seems like she has them by the truckload. Even in the friendliest room in the country for her (and that would be in Iowa) she no doubt shivers like a chihuahua on speed and flop sweats by the gallon. In front of a camera in a controlled and choreographed event she still fucks up, ad-libbing with "real people" must send her to the far reaches of cloud cuckooland.

  • ibwilliamsi

    But she's so purty! And she hates all the right people! How can they not fawn over her?

  • ttommyunger

    On the one hand, Iowans seemed to be a bunch of inbred mouth-breathers. On the other hand, Michelle and her wife, Marcus, seem to be totally fucked in the head. So, I guess the only real answer is: who really gives a fuck? Certainly not me. Let's move on to something important, like Sarah Palin's shoes.

    • MichelesPantalones

      Doesn't Sarah wear some bright-red-sparkly-glitter Chunky Monkey fuck-me pumps or something? Sorta like the Ruby Slippers, but not so gay.

      • ttommyunger

        Perfect description of her footwear…..and her.

  • If she was born in Waterloo, she can't ever be president, you guys. Know why? Waterloo's in Belgium! If she's Belgianese, that would be traitorness to be POTUS.

    Funny, she doesn't look Belgiuman, but she sure has put on weight in that picture.

    • jus_wonderin

      Belgianese sounds like some kinky act Marcus would like to perform.

    • V572 T-Blow

      Tell it to anchor baby Marco Rubio, who'd otherwise be in Iowa right now to sweep the field.

      • where is his birf cirtificate?

        • DahBoner

          I love Rubio's tacos!

  • gullywompr

    Had the Straw Poll already taken place? And who was the winner of said Straw Poll? I rest my case.

    • LetUsBray


  • JoshuaNorton

    constant factual misrepresentations

    As Goethe once stated: "Nothing is more terrifying than ignorance in action."

  • Barack Obama is always late? I remember Clinton Time…. but when that man showed up he was ON! I waited hours for him in a ballroom at the Palmer House Hillton. When he finally showed he shook EVERYONE's hand. I still don't wash it.

    • Bill and Hill lived in the same town as me, (Chappaqua, NY). She was busy being a NY Senator, and he just couldn't get enough of us "locals." He was always chatting at the deli, or bookstore, or coffee-house. Everyone knew him. Some may have disagreed with his policies, but they were blown away by his presence and charisma.
      A genius at retail politics.

      • nappyduggs

        Same thing in Harlem. I swear that guy got slapped more skin than J.J. Evans and more fist bumps than every winner ever at the BET awards.

    • Guppy06

      Did he remember to zip up first?

      • Damn, Guppy!
        Don't be a hater!

        • Guppy06

          I hate everyone who has more sex than I do.

    • MichelesPantalones

      Are you kidding me, if Barack Obama was ever five minutes late for anything, he'd get an earful about CPT.

  • flamingpdog

    I heard that Rick Perry operatives seeded the crowd with pushy old lesbians. There's more than one way to destroy a rival.

    • DahBoner

      And just where does Rick Perry find those pushy old lesbians????

  • owhatever

    Quick, Michele, drive the bus to Atlantic City for a fun weekend by the shore. You need some time off. Take Marcus.

    • Mort_Sinclair

      Or drive to Fire Island, dump Marcus, and then continue due east.

  • Iowans need to wise up. She only traveled to your esteemed state for those fancy foot-longs.

    • MichelesPantalones

      No doubt the first time in her life she ever saw anything that HUGE.


    They excuse themselves for avoiding the dinner. She's migraines and Marcus is analrexic,

  • HedonismBot

    "Can the Barack Obama rock star crap."_Was Obama always late and aloof on the campaign trail? I honestly don't know. I never attended an Obama campaign event._What I do know is that I saw a video just last week of Obama, standing and speaking patiently with non-supporters who showed up for the express purpose of heckling him about how Biden compared teabaggers to terrorists. What I know is that GWBush would have confined any non-supporters to a "free speech zone." _Also, what I know is that Obama's opponents constantly and routinely blast him with whatever insult comes into their empty little heads, whether it has any basis in fact or not. A short while into his presidency, I read some pundit's column about how Obama represented a political Rorshach test – his supporters invested all their hopes and dreams in him (gee, that worked out well,) and the haters project all their worst fears on him, making the man out to be the Socialist Satan incarnate._I admire him for putting himself out there and standing up to his critics. But if he would, just for once, stand for something, then maybe he could stop falling for everything._Sorry for the long post. My soul of wit has no brevity today.

    • __kth__

      Obama won the Iowa caucus precisely because his team had the better ground game, was more tenacious in all that door-knocking, glad-handing crap.

      Also, if there's a Republican who reminds people of Barack Obama, it's Michele Bachmann. Right.

  • LettucePrey

    I don't understand why everyone thinks Michele is crazy. She hides in the bushes during gay parades, believes she is being attacked by lesbians, and that God speaks to her. And the whites in her eyes, also.

    • MichelesPantalones

      I think Michele just had that lid lift surgery, like most old women do (looks like Callista Gingrich did the same). My boss had it done because his lids were drooping enough to interfere with his vision (he's an Oldz fershure). They didn't go overboard with him, since it was a "medical necessity" surgery, but it looks like they went to town on MishMash and CallistaG. Giving them that uber-wide-eyed-wit'-da-KrayKray look.

      • LetUsBray

        Isn't that also where Pickles Bush got that scary Stepford face from?

        • MichelesPantalones

          I always thought poor Laura's face was frozen that way from decades of being married to a stupid jerk. She just stopped registering and checked out from the neck up. But she had the same surgery on her eyes, as you can tell from some of the candid shots of her.

  • BarackMyWorld

    Can the “Barack Obama rock star crap.”

    Fucking community organizers!

  • glamourdammerung

    Just noting that the GOP is "kinda pissed" about her hurting their fragile feelings, not anything based on the crazy she spews. Once again showing that movement conservativism is about the triumph of feelings over facts.

  • Streiffert

    Who isn't sick of hearing Iowans whine about how they can't get face time with candidates? These pig farmers keep are supposed to be helping the rest of us pick our president, not our dinner date.

  • Come here a minute

    Oh Iowa Republicans, take a chill pill! God knows Rep. Bachmann has taken a few.

    • MichelesPantalones

      Oh Iowa Republicans, take a chill pill! God knows Rep. Bachmann has taken a few ^^ bushels. ^^

      FIFY, NNTT.

  • bflrtsplk

    What's the proper heroin etiquette for supper with the Bachmanns? Do I shoot up before the appetizer or snort up between courses?

    • El Pinche

      Before anything you pray to the Lord. "Thank you Lord for allowing the Job Creators to make my drugs and Nyquil. I pray for the niggers, poor people, and these old peasant losers trying to latch on to me like unholy barnacles on this wonderful campaign trip you have given me. "

  • Nostrildamus

    You go, Michele! If I had randy hunk of man meat like Marcus Bachmann waiting for me in the bus, I wouldn't waste time chatting the yokels either.

  • RadioIrene

    Yeah, but she would be a great guy to have a beer with.

    • El Pinche

      also a handful of zoloff and codeine ! Paaarty!

      • Radiotherapy®

        Face down, ass up!

        • MichelesPantalones

          I think Marcus has convinced her that that's the vaunted "missionary position."

  • So nice to know that the insanity extends to alienating "them what brung ya."

  • Jesus, what kind of pharma-cocktail do they have to pump her up with to get her to put out even 5 presentable minutes at these things!?

    • A Muskie Special!

      • MichelesPantalones

        I'll bet it's pretty damn musky.

  • fuflans

    shelley is self-important bitch? Well color me shocked.

  • widget2011

    Iowa may end up being her "Waterloo".

  • nappyduggs

    To be fair, the woman has no concept of dates or times– or anything else, really. She probably thought the dinner was a lunch,showed up hours early, wished everyone a "Happy Boxing Day!" and wondered why she was the only one there.

    Or she's just a dumb, self-absorbed bitch.

  • Barrelhse

    "Why, this is nothing but a two-bit theocrat from a Cracker-Back Jox!"

  • El Pinche

    Good because I'm sick of Bachmann and crybabies like Judd Saul. They can all jump in my giant happy wood-chipper! Wheeeeeeeeeee!

  • DustBowlBlues

    I just read the Mother Jones (reminds me: toss the sofa cushions to come up with some coins to donate to MJ) article about this winger. What a bitch. A mean, mean bitch. I can't wait for their article about Perry.

    As to all the Republics, let me just summarize my deep, complex and total hatred of all of them this way: I hope they drown in their own vomit.

    Current tirade inspired by conversation husband heard downtown. One of the participants has run for state office as a Republic and the most recent race, as a Democrat. To that, I posted on the most popular OK Demo site that RE (except, I spelled his name out) is a douchebag and gave quick evidence of it. I'm sure it got back to him, since a local snitch reads it. The douchebag was talking to another rancher (both have other jobs, of course, like being a manager in a bank–actually, in the parlance "they run cattle" which means it isn't their living) and saying, "In a few years there won't be any government and we get on with business the way we want." Then bitched about state salaries.

    If we're unfortunate enough to have a tornado in our county, these two bitches will be the first to complain about the lack of government aid in here to help– them,and them only. I'd love to give these people a one-way ticket to Somalia, so they can realize their dream immediately, not wait until the Teabaggers take over.

    Or, I hope they drown in their own vomit.

    • Nothingisamiss


  • Guppy06

    "says a prayer and checks out for a few hours"

    Give us this day our daily opiate…

  • sati_demise

    Can a lesbian be a 'beard'? Anyone know?

    • MichelesPantalones

      Vita Sackville-West and Harold Nicholson could tell you.

      Oh, all right, they COULD HAVE told you. Except they're dead now. But their son wrote a very nice book about their very beardy "marriage."

    • 102415

      The best.

  • proudgrampa

    Will you wake me up in January 2013? I just don't care anymore.

  • MichelesPantalones

    Given her "migraines," and all the "drugs" she takes for them, it's hardly surprising that she can't be bothered to rub shoulders with the hoi polloi. What you really needed to do, Kirsten, was examine the topic of Bachmann as a dinner companion. What would you do if you were seated next to Ol KrayZEyez when the top of her head popped off and a little bird sprang forth singing "Cuckoo!" Would you bash it back into place with the nearest piece of flatware? Or go with pouring hot soup all over it in the hope that it would bring what passes for sanity to Michele's feeble excuse for a brain?

    What if she turned to you and said, as she is no doubt wont to do, "The muffins and orange persnickety?" How would you answer that, KBJ?

  • anniegetyerfun

    I thought Republicans preferred their women silent and unseen, anyway?

  • Negropolis

    Don't they understand? If she's allowed to linger amongst us normals and regulars, she may encounter the dreaded lesbian, the most crafty persons of the garden, and the lesbians have the most convincing tongues.

    • MichelesPantalones

      Cunning linguists, all.

    • widget2011

      She has lingered way too long, like a fart you let in your vehicle 2 hours ago, and when you returned, it was still there, waiting for you.

  • Negropolis

    Silly Iowans. She may be from your state, but she's been in Minnesota, too long. Don't they know what Minnesota Nice is? It's an emotionally distant emphasis on politeness as opposed to genuine friendliness. You just got served a heaping on Minnesota Nice, y'all.

  • Lots of damage there, total drug casualty, so maybe the "rock star" is apt somehow.

  • The GOP of Iowa give me migraines too.

  • tihond

    Put a stick in her… This corn dog is done.

  • ibwilliamsi

    I guess I don't get the reference to "Barack Obama rock star crap." When did that happen?

    • HistoriCat

      In reality? Never.
      In the Republican mind? About 10 seconds after it became apparent that McCain lost to "that one."

  • DahBoner

    "Everyone hates Michele Bachmann because she is a greedy, self-serving egomaniac, the end."

    Iowa Republicans are so jealous because they don't have a flamboyantly gay husband, like Marcus Bachmann.


  • Marcus is sick of Michele not having a huge cock.

  • NorthStarSpanx

    I remember Obama's infamous beach photo where we could marvel at the POTUS candidate shirtless. . .but anyone else get a little uncomfortable seeing proof that Michele is human by having a belly-button?

    • HistoriCat

      My eyes!

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