All We Heard Was ‘Scott Brown,’ ‘Twitter’ and ‘Gay’

  twitter pranksters

teehee gay jokes!2 many hawt pixxx of naked gay Scott Brown on Twitter whut??!!?! NO, boo, it’s just some story about one of naked Scott Brown’s dumb aides doing something dumb and very much NOT naked Scott Brown on Twitter. Scott Brown (and Mitt Romney!) aide Eric Fehrnstrom got caught using a fake Twitter account to impersonate the insane alter-ego of Scott Brown’s Democratic challenger Alan Khazei and made jokes about gay videos and a bunch of insider Massachusetts stuff no one understands, which is terrible, mostly because it is inane. We rate this “political scandal” a -4, because it got our hopes up. Damn you, Scott Brown’s lame aide! Oh well, did someone make Eric Fehrnstrom pretend to apologize? 

From WaPo:

A strategist for 2012 presidential candidate Mitt Romney and Republican Sen. Scott Brown (Mass.) has admitted to authoring a fake Twitter account that makes light of the “It Gets Better Project” for gay youth and pokes fun at reporters covering Massachusetts politics.

Romney strategist Eric Fehrnstrom admitted on Wednesday evening to authoring the fake Twitter account @CrazyKhazei.

Related video

“It was my Twitter acccount,” the aide said in an email to the Boston Globe. “Sometimes we take our politics too seriously and this was my way of lightening things up. As they say in politics, if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”

Yes, we hear that one all the time. [WaPo]

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172 comments

    1. Redhead

      No kidding. "Henh, henh, I'm gonna make fun of the gay kids who are already upset and struggling and feeling marginalized because, henh, easy target. And if anyone says anything about my vicious comments, well hey man, I was JUST KIDDING, you can't take a joke, lighten up. That'll totally get me off the hook for whatever asshole things I say! henh, henh."

      1. SorosBot

        Remembering high school and guys like this asshole I'm just surprised he resisted the urge to say "fag videos" instead. It's typical of Republicans, though, that they were the high school bullies and still have the bully mentality.

      2. MichelesPantalones

        Yesterday I learned right here at teh Wonketz that nut-punching is a new, exciting lovestyle of teh ghey. I therefore offer to totally nut-punch Eric Fernstrohm.

  1. V572 T-Blow

    This kind of nonsense will cease when Elizabeth Warren is coronated elected. What could work out better than a Harvard professor in government? Think of, say, Henry Kissinger…

    1. Tundra Grifter

      Conservatives and humor go together like mustard and ice cream.

      Seriously – if you want to cringe, watch, listen or read a right wing nut trying to be funny.

      1. MichelesPantalones

        I've been trying to figure out the astounding lack of funneh in the RWNJs. Someone mentioned that humour needs to skewer the power structure in order to appeal universally. But there's plenty of skewering of *everyone* going on in, say, Voltaire, or Shakespeare, or any of the examples of humour that have come down through the ages. I can't quite put my finger on it, but there's a streak of anger and meanness in the RWNJs' attempts at humour that make it unsuccessful and uncomfortable. Do give me your perspective, though.

  2. MittsHairHelmet

    Massachusetts… the smartest state in the country, still dumb enough to elect Scott Brown.

    1. Negropolis

      And Scott, himself, is easily one of the dumbest senators around, bless his stupid little heart. But, he's cool 'cause he drives a pick-up around MA, right? WTF? I didn't know Massachusetts was Texas.

    1. AJWjr.

      I used to work for a right-wingnut (I know, shocker) and when he thought he was being funny he'd snort and titter while trying to toss out the "punch line", making it entirely unintelligible. I liked my job, so I politely laughed.

    1. mumbly_joe

      His humor does seem to be aimed at the frat boy/teabagger intersection, more than anything else.

      1. DashboardBuddha

        Exactly…and this is one of the things that bugs me about him and his ilk. Drudge, O'Keefe et al are all braying fratboys. They are a real life Steve Dallas, taking delight in giving the world a wedgie.

        1. jodyleek

          "…real life Steve Dallas…"

          I heart you for this, Buddha! Now, where are Opus and Lola Granola when you need 'em?

  3. James Michael Curley

    A "Fehrnstrom" is what we olds call discovering a leak in the Depends while wearing white chinos.

    1. MichelesPantalones

      Welp, at least I'll know what to call the next shart now.

      Teh Wonketz: alwayz wit teh helpful.

        1. SorosBot

          Oh I'd like to see more of O'Keefe – specifically his trial and getting his ass to prison where it belongs.

  4. GunToting[Redacted]

    Neat! Mocking a program designed to try to convince persecuted kids from killing themselves is always good for a laff.

    1. Tundra Grifter

      Reminds me of the evening Johnny Carson just couldn't get his audience going.

      "Should we bring out a fat guy and shoot at his feet?"

    2. SayItWithWookies

      There's nothing funnier than mocking people who don't live up to their own high standard of rugged individualism — right after they complain about being persecuted by the PC media.

    1. Tundra Grifter

      CW: Perry may take the lead, but Romney takes the nomination. The GNoP always takes the most corporate candidate.

    1. Negropolis

      Actually, it wasn't even an attempt at an apology. He simply fired another shot across the bow.

  5. mumbly_joe

    A commenter on TPM came up with a proposal that I highly support. Calling "scandals"(???) like this "Inside Baseball" is an insult to baseball, which may be extremely boring, but at least it's fun to overeat and overdrink while baseball is going on somewhere near you.

    So, I hearby second his proposal for a new name for this sort of stuff: Incest Media. Not only is it so gross that even talking about it is gross, but you won't actually have any fun if you're near it, either.

    1. SayItWithWookies

      Now that News of the World is no longer tapping the royal family, I guess the name's available.

  6. x111e7thst

    "..if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.” Good one. Right up there with: "If you can't stand the blackface, don't go to the minstrel show".

    1. Tundra Grifter

      Or, "Who knew there was anything wrong with watermelon jokes? My family has been telling them for years."

      1. MichelesPantalones

        Now imagine being a nonwhite person and hearing those jokes. And when you point out that they're not funny, what do these walking incarnations of pure chutzpah respond with? "Well, I don't understand why you're so sensitive! It's not like *you're* black, or anything." This to someone who looks black enough to black people to pass. Is there some degree of "blackness" one must have before finding watermelon jokes unfunny? I think I'm going to put together a book and title it When to Laugh, or The Appropriateness Of Ethnic Humour. If I survive that long.

      1. user-of-owls

        Don't fuhget Franklin, we-ah in da Axis too. We has dis old geezah in town growin' up that was in the State Depahtment a wicked long time ago and met this big deal Egyptian pol named Nassah, who he said was a complete piece a' work. Anyway, latah the guy got a degree from MIT in astronomics or somethin' and cuz his old man worked with Big Joe, Jack called and got him into Nasser for a wicked pissah careah, but some asshole drunk statie fuckin' croaked 'em on 495. The statie screwed, but they found his body all fucked ovah back a the MTA shop in Braintree.

    1. freakishlywrong

      Ugh. And his visor backwards, so the awful part of a visor that's supposed to shade his face, and the only reason anyone wears those hideous things, is rendered worthless. But it gives him "street cred".

  7. elviouslyqueer

    Well, Scott Brown might not be gay, but judging from his (real) pic, Fehrnstrom's had his face buried in the crotch of more than a few pairs of magic undies.

  8. MissusBarry

    Once again, rethugs demonstrate their canny grasp of Murkin humor. Dude, you're unworthy of quality snark.

  9. petehammer

    Fehrnstrom is a classic combination of German words that we don't have a very exact definition for. I guess the closest is the feeling when you try so hard to poop – you're sitting and grunting, etc – that you end up pissing in your own face. It's more eloquent in German, but you get the gist of it.

    Example – I was so focused on racing my bike that I ignored the red light and ended up Fehrnstroming myself on a truck.

  10. Barb

    "As they say in politics, if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”
    I thought it was "if you can't stand the kitchen or your kids, tweet stupid shit and make the Forbes list of powerful twats."

    1. bikerlaureate

      In flyover country it's more like "If you can't stand the sadistic bullying, get out of existence".

    2. Negropolis

      I though it was "if you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen, unless you're a woman, in which case we've chained you to the hot stove."

  11. Goonemeritus

    “Sometimes we take our politics too seriously and this was my way of lightening things up. As they say in politics, if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”

    Yes nothing funnier than bullying gay teens into committing suicide. I swear sometimes these bastards make wish for the existence of an actual hell.

  12. fartknocker

    Fuck Twitter. You need to explain to me why I am supposed to vote for you. Social media and politics is just a bunch of fucking noise.

    Sorry about the rant. Me and Mr. Daniels had a little too much of each other last night. No sympathy is wanted.

    1. Tundra Grifter

      Only two Daniels worth a damn – Charlie and Jack.

      And since he started being such a reactionary jerk (whatever happend to that redneck hippie?) I'm no longer so sure about Charlie.

  13. Sue4466

    He made fun of the "It Gets Better" project? Let's hope Dan Savage is right now redefining the google definition of "Fehrnstrom" so we can see if this fuckwit can stand that heat.

    1. bagofmice

      "You got your Fehrnstrom in my Santorum!"
      "You got your Santorum in my Fehrnstrom!"

      Officer Reese: "Hmmm…"

      1. Gleem_McShineys

        But used more a unit of measure of jizz, maybe? "Man, that is like 6 Fernstroms in that gross old condom laying on the sidewalk"

      1. MichelesPantalones

        You don't even have to be gay! All abstinence should include a suicide component! After all, X years without sex during your highest-ever hormone levels is something no teen should ever have to suffer.

  14. deanbooth

    "A strategist for 2012 presidential candidate Mitt Romney and Republican Sen. Scott Brown"

    And we need more evidence that this guy is a douche?

  15. DashboardBuddha

    When I taught at-risk kids they demonstrated breathtaking heights of passive aggressive behavior. Ex: (actual rant by a girl who had been insulted by another girl – cell phone discussion)

    "You cunt! You cunt! I hope you fucking die…I hope your rape baby comes out black! Just kidding"

    Just kidding…you could say the most horrible thing ever and nullify it with "just kidding". Shit like this is likely to trigger PSTD from my alt-ed days.

    …and I'm not fucking kidding.

    1. comrad_darkness

      oh my god, you have totally explained my insane college roommate. The one I went broke renting an apartment to get away from. Wow. Also reminded me of him after I'd totally forgotten. Well, painful insight I guess.

  16. DaRooster

    "As they say in politics…"? Do they really say that? You guy should find something more useful to do other than "tweet" your shit all about.
    #douchebag

  17. KeepFnThatChicken

    …he got caught doing this?! How the fuck do you get caught tweeting a bunch of nonsense from a fake account? Who cares enough to see you do this?

    I mean, people tweet from freeways and bathrooms and dressing areas and sexytime and in chambers and during prayer and holy ghost revivals. HOW DID HE GET CAUGHT?!

    1. MichelesPantalones

      Given the kind of hateful shit he was tweeting, some offended person was undoubtedly keeping track of him.

  18. EatsBabyDingos

    Lil Eric in 5th grade:

    Teacher: "Lil Eric, use 'disaster' in a sentence."

    Lil Eric: "Lil Scotty Perry taught me to shove waterborn M-80's up people's butts, so when I shoved one up Sally's butt, it dis-assed her."

    Quoth the Raven, "ehhh."

  19. BaldarTFlagass

    "As they say in politics, if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”

    I don't think anyone ever said that. Dickweed.

  20. Not_So_Much

    Seriously? This was worth making fun of? He couldn't make a kitty crush video instead? What an asshat. Welcome to obscurity, now GTFO.

  21. SayItWithWookies

    If there's a bright side to this, Newt Gingrich is thrilled that an actual human is following him on twitter.

  22. timbo71351

    God, what an asshole. Politics seems to just be made for awful people like this, who have no sense of humor, zero sex appeal and harbor grudges over trivial shit.

      1. MichelesPantalones

        Well, shit. I was going to say "Hitler," just because I almost ALWAYS say "Hitler," and then I saw your post and remembered that it really *wasn't* that ratfucker, for a change.

        So, Baldur von Schirach. Wut?

    1. V572 T-Blow

      Kraftwerk?
      Symbolist poet Rainer Maria Rilke?
      Henry Kissinger?
      Heidi Klum? (from the ridiculous to the sublime)

  23. glamourdammerung

    Anyone else noticing a trend with conservatives impersonating folks online to make ridiculous remarks because conservatives have no rebuttals based on reality?

  24. glamourdammerung

    Also, noting that this moron outed himself because he was too stupid to realize which Twitter account he was on.

  25. comrad_darkness

    > if you want less spending and lower taxes then you're a terrorist

    When the country is deep in three fucking wars, you damn well are.

  26. James Michael Curley

    OT – "Maine, Alaska, Oklahoma, Kentucky and Nevada, ranked at the top for divorces, while Utah, Wyoming and Arkansas – which had the highest marriage rates – were also higher than average in marital breakups. New Jersey, Connecticut, Massachusetts and New York ranked among the lowest in divorces."

    So much for those Red State Family Values. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/08/25/united-s

    1. Biel_ze_Bubba

      That's because us libruls don't bother getting married — at least not for the first 10 years.

      1. Negropolis

        Which kind of means that the ones that do get married are for real about it. The best way to "protect marriage" is to delay it, obviously.

  27. Biel_ze_Bubba

    "if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”

    No, Eric, it's the TWIT we can't stand.

  28. Doktor Zoom

    The only Scott Brown tweet I want to read about is the one that says "Congratulations to Senator-Elect Warren."

  29. Limeylizzie

    All I know is I am in the cone of uncertainty, so canned goods, warm drinks and nuts at my place this weekend.

  30. LiveToServeYa

    Pointless. You can't make a fake Twitter account without it going amok and supporting Newt Gingrich.

  31. ttommyunger

    Not saying Scott is teh gay, but I'm betting he would hold one between his cheeks (upper or lower) 'till the swelling went down.

  32. Callyson

    “I promise to devote all my time in office to making gay videos. Shame on Scott Brown for focusing on jobs!”
    Given the lack of success Scott Brown is having in his laser like focus on jobs, those gay videos don't sound so bad. Gay porn actors need to make a living too…

  33. not that Dewey

    If the Post had said the same thing about the campaigns themselves, I may consider reading it.

  34. Tundra Grifter

    This is the Boss "I wasn't wrong; I was misinformed" BlunderRush "defense" – string together a series of remarkably tasteless comments, then defend yourself with "Can't you take a joke?"

  35. Ohforcripessake

    "..sophomoric and borders on being tasteless."

    Sums up our political climate quite nicely.

  36. Negropolis

    I love how mainstream news has ben so neutered, that they had to add the qualifier "borders on being" to tasteless, as if it's not tasteless right on its face.

  37. MittsHairHelmet

    Actually Romney was an excellent governor for us. After Cellucci/Jane Swift's incompetence, Mitt was a major upgrade.

    Remember, he does whatever he thinks will make his constituents happy. That healthcare law really works. Our uninsured rate is 2%.

  38. elviouslyqueer

    That healthcare law really works. Our uninsured rate is 2%.

    Louder, please. 'Cuz inconvenient facts like this make baby John Boehner cry.

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