Perennially unpopular Florida governor Rick Scott's doomed attempts at constituent relations mostly consist of harassing robocalls filled with Rick Scott's whimpering voice being piped across Florida telephone lines into millions of unwilling eardrums like some incurable mutant Ebola virus of audio assault infecting everyone's dinner time. WELL GUESS WHAT? Florida can play that game, too, Rick! The website Pink Slip Rick is offering annoyed voters the chance to record their own 60-second messages for Rick Scott, which they began sending to the governor's office on Monday. What does Florida have to tell Rick Scott?
You can listen to some of the hilarious and angry recordings here. A few at random:
JIM C.: "Governor Scott, I'll do everything I can to get you out of office, because I think you are about the worst thing ever to happen to the state of Florida, and not only that, you're the creepiest person in government."
GEORGE L.: "Hey Rick, just wanted to let you know that we're not real happy with the whole program here, my wife being a school teacher practically being destroyed by your policies and me being in architecture and I haven't had any work based on all of the great job creation programs that you've been implementing. So I just thought it'd be nice if we could robocall you back the way you've been robocalling me with your automated B.S. just to let you know how it feels, doofus."
SUSAN G.: "Hello there, Governor Rick Scott. I just wanted to tell you how much I really haven't enjoyed having you call my house and interrupt my evenings to tell me all the wonderful things that you are doing for the state of Florida. Rick, I just want to let you know that I read this week about how you have health insurance for under $400 a year, and yet you turned back the money from the federal government that would have allowed me to have access to health insurance. Rick, that just sucks my behind. I can't believe that you did that."
Florida is feisty! [ Pink Slip Rick via WTSP ]
Ooooh, but we don't want to put all those poor insurance companies' tinpot despots out of work! That would be unfair!!!1!
He'll "channel" me, all right.