'free' speech is for socialists

Atheists Win Right To Molest Christian Eyes With Godless Bus Ads

“Is God irrelevant?” This is the question that wingnut Arkansas Christians will now be required by court ruling to consider every time they ride, see or get hit by public buses in Little Rock, because of some atheist bus ads. A group of pagans/sharias/goat-worshippers/Christine O’Donnell won a lawsuit allowing them to place ads promoting atheism on public buses after first being rejected because the group could not afford the massively expensive damage insurance against freaky Christian mobs spontaneously showing up to go all “crucifixion crazy” on the ads and buses. So, hooray! First Amendment Jesus is alive or dead depending on which of these two groups you ask, atheists or wingnuts, because Jesus wants people to be free to speak their minds/ wants people to be able to walk freely through the streets without a steaming pile of cheeky godlessness oppressing the good Christian vibe.

Reuters reports:

Judge Susan Webber Wright ruled that the Central Arkansas Transit Authority and its advertising agency should not have denied the group the right to place the ads on 18 publicly-funded city buses during Memorial Day weekend.

Washington-based United Coalition of Reason filed a lawsuit on behalf of the Arkansas group in June after the transit authority and its advertising agency rejected an ad that would have read, “Are you good without God? Millions are.”

“This was a victory for all of us whether you believe in God or not, because it’s a victory of free speech,” United Coalition of Reason’s attorney J.G. Schultz told Reuters.

The transit authority and its advertising agency, On The Move Advertising, had required payment of a $36,000 deposit to run the ad. The group then changed that to a $3 million insurance policy in case of bus vandalism by angry Christians.

And now the atheist group will run the bus ads on routes going past college campuses, which are already godless, so this was all a lot of socialism for nothing. [Reuters]

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    1. Walkinwiddaking

      “Is God irrelevant?”

      Certainly not in the Christian world as long as God looks like Fabio's dad.

    2. gizdal

      the bible= god's big book of bad ideas.

      by the way, keep in mind that Jesus never read the bible.

      but don't tell the gay bachmanns about that.

  1. donner_froh

    Is God dead?

    Maybe, maybe not. But you will be when you get run over by Central Arkansas Transit Authority bus, no matter what kind of ad it has.

    1. anniegetyerfun

      There are these bumperstickers that I see everywhere in Seattle (really) that read, "Jesus is ________." It's almost too much to take! Like they WANT me to be involved in Biblical MadLibs.

  2. GunToting[Redacted]

    It's funny how the Wingers are all "yay Constitution" until it buts up against their beliefs.

    1. CZL

       (LOGIC) The principle governing human intellection. Its nature may be deduced from examining the two following propositions, both of which are held by human beings to be true and often by the same people: "I can't so you mustn't," and "I can but you mustn't."
      from "The Hipcrime Vocab" by Chad C. Mulligan

        1. CZL

          I wake up every day hoping I'm in "Muddle Earth" and cry when I realize it's still "Stand on Zanzibar."

          1. finallyhappy

            Do you know the Assyrian king list poem? I need to look for it again- I learned it in college when I was studying things like the importance of polychrome brick glazing in the ANE.

    2. not that Dewey

      It's funny how the Wingers are all "yay Constitution" until it buts up against their beliefs they read it.


  3. terriblyfamous

    Score one for our evil atheist agenda! Hooray! How long before the murderous, vandalous orgies start, do ya think?

      1. terriblyfamous

        We've got a long way to go in Arkansas before we reach THAT level of debased debauchery… but a girl can dream.

    1. succalina

      Or you do, and you have tithed your hobo beans and cardboard box-home to whomever Pastor/Priest Grifter has told you to give all your possessions to the church so you don't go to hell.

      But hell might be better then living in a cardboard box under an overpass. Hard call.

    2. zhubajie

      Or maybe you're on your way to a crossroads to sell your sell and get the Hell out of Arkansas!

    1. V572 Coif of Destiny

      Atheists, unlike Christians, must not only be right — they must be likable. Otherwise: off to slammer w/'em. Actually this rule applies to all minorities who actually expect society to treat them fairly. That Jackie Robinson: he was so well-mannered!

      1. Negropolis

        Atheists, unlike Christians, must not only be right — they must be likable.

        I'm glad someone put that into words, because it's the God's (pun intended) honest truth.

  4. Chillwaver

    "The group then changed that to a $3 million insurance policy in case of bus vandalism by angry Christians."

    Speaking of angry Xtians fucking up buses, what's Snobwilly Grifter up to nowadays?

  5. SheriffRoscoe

    So the wicked godless were the ones having to pay millions as insurance against the destruction and mahem and barbarism of the children of god? Sounds about right.

    1. GOPCrusher

      Wonder if that insurance policy covers if some religious extremists fly one of those buses into an abortion clinic?

  6. Callyson

    The wingnuts are *really* going to lose their shit if/when they find out about this:
    Susan Webber Wright (born 1948) is a United States federal judge, presently serving as the chief judge of the United States District Court for the Eastern District of Arkansas. She received national attention when she dismissed the sexual harassment lawsuit brought by Paula Jones against President Bill Clinton in 1998. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Susan_Webber_Wright
    Cue left – wing conspiracy theory in 3…2…1…

    1. horsedreamer_1

      I knew I remembered the name from the Clinton era. I thought she was a Clinton appointee, but the actual event is even better.

  7. HobbesEvilTwin

    I knew I recognized that judge's name: from wiki

    She received national attention when she dismissed the sexual harassment lawsuit brought by Paula Jones against President Bill Clinton in 1998.

    See, everything really is Clinton's fault, sheeple!

  8. x111e7thst

    If these ads are put on buses Arkansas will be stricken with drought and a plague of foolish and annoying induhviduals. Oh wait..

    1. Jukesgrrl

      And the Huckabees will don even more bizarre clothing than what they usually wear. Rock on, you Obama-hatin', gun-totin' Hucksters.

  9. Barb

    Angry Christians? What's up with that? Christians are "supposed" to be nice. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, "take this and eat it, for it is my body", he didn't say "eat me."

    1. Guppy06

      And whosoever shall not receive you, nor hear your words, when ye depart out of that house or city, shake off the dust of your feet.

      And curb stomp those fornicators of mothers.

  10. OneYieldRegular

    "The group then changed that to a $3 million insurance policy in case of bus vandalism by angry Christians."

    Simply outrageous, given that Christians never show anger and never engage in violence.

  11. user-of-owls

    They need $3 million to insure a local bus fleet? I told them at the public hearing that it was a bad idea to approve those direct flights from Brixton to Little Rock, but would they listen? Nooo.

        1. Geminisunmars

          If you allow a male muppet to marry a male muppet, soon you'll be having pig on frog orgies.

        2. Doktor Zoom

          Best comment from that piece:

          When I was a kid I always assumed that Bert and Ernie were a couple. I didn't spend, like, a lot of time thinking about it. They just seemed like most adult couples that I knew … They bickered constantly, but were inexplicably fond of each other regardless…I pretty much saw them as same-gendered, puppet versions of my parents.

          Which I think is kinda sweet, really

    1. Jukesgrrl

      They better not cover their heads in black fabric like the London rioters did. That might look … umm … Muslim.

  12. CapeClod

    It's a state that borrowed 80% of its name from another state. I don't think they have much in the way of a creative imagination.

    1. the_bat

      I created an account just so I can ask you if your comment is serious. Is it? If so, Arkansas gained statehood some 20 years before Kansas and the Arkansas Territory existed some 30 years before the Kansas Territory.

    2. the_bat

      Apparently, my commenting on a fallacy that now has 24 likes isn't allowed. Intense debate indeed. I'll say it again. Arkansas became a state some 20 years before Kansas and the Arkansas Territory existed some 30 years before the Kansas territory.

  13. baconzgood

    Central Arkansas Transit Authority, ahhh the 4 words I think of when I think of "open minded".

  14. SoBeach

    Man I hate to see an all-powerful god get picked on. Maybe we could give Him karate lessons or something. Give Him the confidence to stand up to those atheist and judge bullies…

    1. Lascauxcaveman

      Push his buttons just right, and you end up with Issac on Jacob type violence, or that whole Sodom & Gomorrah debacle, or worse. Don't screw with the guy, is what I'm sayin'.

  15. horsedreamer_1

    How does Christopher Hitchens square this ruling with his long-time atheism & his new blood-brotherhood with the messianists fomenting Apocalypse in the Middle East?

    Plus, add in the presence of the judge who sided with that terrible, terrible Clill Binton, &, well… I think "going Scanners" is going to take Ol' Hitch before Cancer has a chance.

  16. user-of-owls

    Laugh all you want, but you know the real reason we started putting up pagan billboards and ads?

    To detour the waves of Texan refugees fleeing that God-Smoted state and keep them movin' right on down the road.

  17. SayItWithWookies

    Atheism in Arkansas? What the hell's next — literacy in Texas? It's this kind of uncertainty that keeps businesses from hiring people, you know.

    1. DahBoner

      "It's this kind of uncertainty that keeps businesses from hiring people, you know."

      We're certain that Republican Jerb Craters are just chillin' until they get a Republican president…

  18. SorosBot

    So the bus company's excuse was that Christians were just so irrational and violent against non-Christians they couldn't be trusted not to resort to vandalism by a mild atheist message just pretty much saying we exist? Sounds about right.

    1. Redhead

      To be fair, by the time add up bomb insurance, plane-crash-attack insurance, gun massacre insurance, torching-the-vehicle insurance, ramming-with-Hoverrounds insurance, state-wide-defunding insurance to the defacing/vandalism insurance, it is a pretty high premium.

      1. SorosBot

        I thought it was best to be in the corner, to be in the spotlight, when losing your religion.

        1. nappyduggs

          Back when I used to frequent public transport, I encountered a couple of riders who always"thought that they heard you laughing". And then they try and shank you.

    1. hollywooddood

      I was riding on the bus late one night and the guy across from me unzipped and started jerking off. It was at that moment I lost my religion and knew I was forever doomed to godless communism.

      1. Jukesgrrl

        Oh, I thought I was the only one who saw that.
        (First time when I was in 11th grade and countless times since then. Seems to be quite the usual practice in the bus-riding community.)

        1. anniegetyerfun

          That is one of many reasons why I only walk around downtown. No, fuck public transporation, if I can't get anyone to help me when some fucking crazy woman decides to start beating me with an umbrella on the bus, then I will put all of my money into good walking shoes.

          Keeps my ass looking better, anyway.

    2. finallyhappy

      I ride the bus in DC- I am the older white lady with the yarn(because there are not a lot of old white women on the 79 or even the S buses in DC). So say hi if you see me- but please do not unzip your pants

  19. baconzgood

    Angry Christians?

    And Jesus said atop the mountian "blessed are the pissed, for they shall destroy public property. Blessed are the violent, for they shall NEVER heed to my teachings. Blessed are the graffito taggers, for with their Sharpie pens they shall bring forth the wisdom of 'you want to see a joke? it's in your hand' on thine urinal partition"

  20. BarackMyWorld

    The next piece of this story will be about a bus driver getting in trouble for refusing to drive a bus with the ads on it. And then Fox News will get ahold of it…

    1. horsedreamer_1

      No different than pharmacists being allowed to shirk their professional obligations & not dispense contraception.

  21. Come here a minute

    It will be fun to see how much vandalism is inflicted by the fine upstanding Christians of Little Rock.

  22. DahBoner

    In America, we have Freedom of Religion.

    Which means, if you ain't religious, you are not free and should be thrown in prison…

  23. DustBowlBlues

    I hope I don't see one of these. I would have to leave the United Methodist church because all Xians, like Faux News watchers, know that if you're exposed to anything with which you might disagree, your value system and world outlook crumbles.

    WTF are these kind of people so afraid of?

  24. DahBoner

    Why do these pictures of Jesus always depict him with long, straight hair?

    According to the Bible, Jesus had a Jewfro.

    In Daniel 7:9, it says that his "ancient of days did sit, whose garment [was] white as snow, and the hair of his head like the pure wool"

    1. baconzgood

      Jebus sported the Dr. J? Maybe I should rethink this whole not being Catholic anymore thing.

  25. Major Thom

    A life without God is like Rick Perry without hair. Think on that one, atheist mutherf***ers.

    1. Jukesgrrl

      Have you seen the photos of Warren Jeffs since he's been thrown in an actual Texas pen and had his head shaved? The first thing I thought was, "If Rick Perry had his head shaved, he'd look just like that."

      Get on it, Texas.

  26. Dürers Rhino

    Don't you godless commies know that 'freedom of religion' is only for christians? Those other people, the 'jews' and the 'muslins' and the 'pastafarians' haven't been bathed in the blood of christ so whatever they're doing, it isn't 'religion'. So there.

    1. GOPCrusher

      USA! USA! USA!

  27. DaRooster

    Do people really believe that Christians would purposely deface the property of others and interfere with their rights? Come on, don't you understand that they are for understanding and forgiveness even if someone else believes differently than them… that's how they do.

  28. comptoneffect

    Remembering how the conservative media went bananas after the Mohamed cartoon riots, I’ll be waiting for descriptions from the Fox News Crew about how violent Christianity is after the first bus is burnt by a raving mob.

  29. Oblios_Cap

    The group then changed that to a $3 million insurance policy in case of bus vandalism by angry Christians.

    Explain to me again how they're different than the Muslims who got all stoked because of Cartoon Mohammeds?

    Damn! I'm surprised the Taliban isn't irate because "Mohammed" (on whom peace!) contains "ham"!

    1. GOPCrusher

      That was the exact reason the Xtians used here in Iowa when they sued to have the athiest signs removed from buses in Des Moines last winter. The judge ruled against them.

      1. horsedreamer_1

        He doesn't mind this day of rest shit, nor will He mind this denial of His divinity. He'll still fuck you up Wednesday. Big date for the league semis…

  30. Steverino247

    The Baptists are pissed about it because they know the game is potentially up. There's a lot of power being exerted by manipulation of sincerely held religious beliefs and superstitions.

    People like to blame Reagan for our political troubles, but the real reason is the candidacy of Pat Robertson. He turned those assholes on to politics and we've been fucked ever since. I blame Reagan for a lot of things, but Pat Robertson turned the nation's political arena into a rented sports arena with dipshits holding their hands up in the air before leaving to do as they are told.

  31. mormos

    As an atheist, I can attest to the fact that atheists suck at generating good will towards atheism.

  32. chascates

    To the ass-wipes that have become the vocal majority of this declining country it's 'Freedom of religion, not freedom from religion. If you don't believe in their Invisible Space Giant you're no better than a dangerous Islamist (and their Invisible Space Giant.)

    1. anniegetyerfun

      It's time we get in the habit of saying, "That's just what the Islamists think" to pretty much any of these "faith"-forcing assholes.

      I mean, I want it to be a mantra. Short and sweet, like "Why do you hate America?" And I want liberals to use it ALL THE TIME.

  33. Guppy06

    Well… it sounds like the city has two choices:
    Find some way to increase revenue for public transportation so that they don't have to be treated at rolling billboards to begin with, or…Shut down public transportation entirely
    I know what I'm betting on!

  34. not that Dewey

    The fact that we need an organization called "United Coalition of Reason" bodes trouble for the future of America.

    1. genxr

      Not to mention the fact that the "United Coalition of Reason" needs to be insured against attacks by angry mobs.

      Wait, come to think of it, business as usual for the human race.

  35. Suq Madiq

    I don't see what their problem is. That's $5000 that went into the pocket of some Peeple-ration agency. Free market wins over the Constitution, right? I mean this is America, where individuals don't have rights unless you can afford your own representative or have a PAC in your name.

  36. genxr

    Bill Hicks said it best.

    A couple of hicks after the show approached him and said: "We're Christians and we don't like what you said."
    Bill Hicks replied: "Then forgive me."

    1. GOPCrusher

      In the current atmosphere, I can only imagine what someone like Bill Hicks or George Carlin would say.

  37. mumbly_joe

    “Are you good without God? Millions are.”

    Err, shouldn't it be Billions? You know, because there is no God, and thus anyone who is good, is good without God? Atheistfail.

  38. Negropolis

    Wait, wait…they have public transportation central Arkansas?

    Silly, Kirsten, (white) Arkansas Christians don't ride mass transit. They don't even live close enough to their city cores to even see buses.

  39. gurukalehuru

    No snark here, I offer this entrepeneurial inspiration absolutely free of charge to any Wonketeer with entrepeneurial tendencies,a couple more spare spondoolicks than the rest of us and a love of Italian cuisine: The Flying Spaghetti Monster restaurant! Because all godless atheists love spaghetti, and pizza, and maybe even an occasional veal parmigian, all washed down with huge quantities of delicious but reasonable priced red wine served by buxom young waitresses in sexy (but not demeaning) uniforms.
    The menu with it's cleverly named entrees would become a collector's item. You could even sell T- Shirts, and have a particularly offensive Sunday brunch special.

  40. Naked_Bunny

    This is a bad precedent. Next thing you know, atheists will want to vote and get married like real Americans.

  41. ttommyunger

    In my youth I had sex on a public bus on two occasions. I must say if I ever have the chance to do so again, I don't want the Baby Jeebus looking down on me, thank you very much. ps. Don't know about Heaven, but without sex, riding on a public bus is Hell.

  42. slowhansolo

    For 35 years in a wingnut town in Pennsyltucky, they erected a nativity scene on government land at the town square. No one peeped for generations, until a local godless slime insisted that his manifesto must get equal time at the same site. The solution was an ordinance banning all such displays on the town square. The nativity moved across the roundabout to a church still on the square, more prominent than ever, on private, nonprofit property.

    Just saying, it's progress.

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