endless grifters

Naked Levi Johnston’s Sister Now Also Naked And Yelling At Bristol Palin

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the pride of wasilla portraitWhat are the bitter, unemployed naked young people in Wasilla doing these days between meth come downs? Still aborting America’s collective remaining brain cells one by one with the gale-force toxic winds of their regularly scheduled rants rehashing the gross details of Bristol Palin’s achievements in unprotected sex? Yes, is your answer. Secondary Palin family media welfare beneficiary Mercede Johnston did the Johnston family thing and posed nude for the September issue of Playboy to get someone to listen to her “tell her side of the Bristol-Levi tent sex parties” that she was never involved in, again. Has Levi ever thought to himself, “it’s weird my sister is always talking about my penis?” No. Oh well, what’s the shocker this time: “Bristol Palin like totally planned her pregnancy.” Are we even still talking about 2008?

We did not read the dumb Playboy interview excerpts, so here is something we copy-pasted from some other gossip site looking for pageviewz:

As for Bristol, Johnston says the former Dancing with the Stars contestant underwent “numerous” plastic surgeries and liposuction procedures both before and after giving birth to her and Levi’s son, Tripp.

Johnston also addresses Bristol’s pregnancy, which was revealed after her mother joined John McCain’s campaign in 2008.

“Bristol’s pregnancy wasn’t unexpected,” Johnston alleges. “She and Levi planned it. They were trying to conceive for months.”

She would know, she was standing right there watching the whole time. [People]

Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • nounverb911

    Shouldn't Mercede be minding the meth lab?

    • Not_So_Much

      It done blowed up real good and blowed all her clothes off.

    • EatsBabyDingos

      Nah, the explosion blew her "s" off the Mercedes.

      • elviouslyqueer

        There's a blow job joke in here somewhere…

      • PristinePantalones

        Now that made me laugh my "s" off.

  • El Pinche

    I shoulda lived in Alaska when I was a teen . Damn… I love sluts.

    • DashboardBuddha
    • Radiotherapy┬«

      You know who else loved sluts?

      • mumbly_joe

        *cough*

      • PristinePantalones

        Other than mumbly_joe, I'm guessing … men?

    • FlyOverGirl

      'Slut" is a required class in 7th grade.

  • memzilla

    The name for the next Palin spawn will be Sue Doh Efedrene.

    • horsedreamer_1

      Korean?

    • EatsBabyDingos

      Impregnated by Homer Simpson?

    • BerkeleyBear

      Too many syllables. I'm thinking just come out with it – Meth, Crank, Speed all work.

  • Barb

    Looks like Bristol, aka "Nanookie of the North" isn't going to like this article one damned bit.

    • freakishlywrong

      Yes, the Mensa meeting that will be the war of words on the Facebook should be riveting.

      • Barb

        Yeah, it's going to be a real Algonquin round table over there.
        I wonder if Mercede is going to wake up with a caribou head in her bed, courtesy of Mama Grizzly's "chubby cub", Bristol.

        • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

          Wasilla Algonquin Round table (which is actually square):

          Mercede
          Levi
          Brisket

          • Barb

            And a shitlode of high chairs and booster seats.

          • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

            It's a regular brain trust, I tellya.

          • Negropolis

            ROTFLMAO!

      • Nostrildamus

        Mensa Menstrua

        • riverside68

          Pregnancy is how you avoid the Menses, don't ya know?

          It's part of Bristol's abstinence presentation . . .

    • Angry_Marmot

      There are articles?

    • GOPCrusher

      Mercede posing nude for Playboy? Oh hell yeah! It is on like Donkey Kong. Either Brisket or Bible Spice will be next. Neither one will take this laying down. Unless it's on a bareskin rug in front of a fireplace.

    • tcaalaw

      I hope "Nanookie of the North" becomes Bristol's official sobriquet on Wonkette.

      • PristinePantalones

        I join you in this hope.

  • Grief_Lessons

    Saying that they were trying to conceive for months almost implies that a member of the Palin family started a project and carried it out to completion.

    • memzilla

      As opposed to quitting halfway through? Looks like that characteristic skips a generation.

      • Guppy06

        Isn't that stereotypically the guy's role?

      • SorosBot

        But Bristol seems to have quit on the raising the kid part. Like mother, like daughter.

    • hollywooddood

      Those Palin men and their members! Gah.

  • freakishlywrong

    Trite. Name the next one Trite.

    • El Pinche

      Or Tripe…it fits their meat motif.

      • Barb

        Nothing fits Bristol's "meat motif" anymore. Poor dumb guys probably have to strap moose antlers to their asses to keep from falling in.

        • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

          God damn!

          Girl, you nasty.

        • proudgrampa

          Whoa!! That was good!!! Wish I could upfist more than once on that one!!!

          • Steverino247

            Upfist? Hell, dive right in. (Let me know if you find your car keys so I'll cancel the tow truck, too.)

        • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

          Also: that is a whole lotta roast beef drapes.

          • BerkeleyBear

            Where do you think they got the skin to stretch over her new chin?

          • El Pinche

            Mmmmmm Arbys

        • El Pinche

          LMAO!! What a visual.

        • GOPCrusher

          Trich. As in short for Trichinosis. From eating raw pork.

          • PristinePantalones

            Sounds too Asian.

    • Negropolis

      I like Tricks/Trixx von Palin.

  • Lucidamente1

    Mercede Johnston? Well, at least she doesn't have to think up a porn name.

    • LettucePrey

      Ironically, her stripper name is Hester.

  • GunToting[Redacted]

    Tits AND GTFO.

  • fartknocker

    Fuck you John McCain for bringing this spawn of a family into the lower 48.

    • nounverb911

      Build the darn fence!

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

      You got to hand it to the wily old crotchety jabberhead: he probably got to diddle each one of them as a condition of Sarah's employment offer.

    • BTWBFDIMHO

      Three Plagues in the lower 48 can be traced back to McCain's work: the Hobbits, the Johnstons, and the Palins.

  • Not_So_Much

    I thought all families in Alaska knew all there was to know about each others' genitals?

  • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

    I see a Missouri GOP stalker in Mercede's future….

    • PristinePantalones

      He's old enough now that she could probably hold him off with one hand.

  • SexySmurf

    Do people still buy Playboy? And don't say "for the articles." Nobody ever bought Playboy for the articles.

    • proudgrampa

      Oh, I bought it for the interviews. I sincerely wanted to know about the wonderful women that Playboy found and their thoughts on issues of the day…

      What? You don't believe me???

    • BerkeleyBear

      Stevie Wonder did (not joking).

      • PristinePantalones

        Of course he did. It's not like he could see the pitchers anyway.

    • BerkeleyBear

      I didn't buy it, but I did occassionally read the articles in my dad's stash (and the obscene cartoons were pretty funny).

    • Doktor Zoom

      Actually, my high school English teacher did. She had a thick file of Playboy interviews with authors and other Big Names.

      Then again, it was the 70s

    • FlyOverGirl

      Yeah … doesn't this interwebs thingy have porn for free?

  • DashboardBuddha

    I am nigh on sick to death of the shrill, artless, moronic, go nowhere do-nothing fame whores polluting our collective unconscious.

    • elviouslyqueer

      T-Paw, is that you? We told you at the beginning of your campaign to go batshit or GTFO, but did you listen?

    • 102415

      Not me. I like it.

    • GOPCrusher

      But now it haz boobies!

    • Negropolis

      That said, Sarah Palin posts are like comfort food, to me, compared to the All Rick Perry/All The Time posts that have stunk up the place here lately. Sarah is like the brisket at Boston Market: shitty quality, but you warm it up enough you can stomach it. Plus, you always know what you're going to get.

      • DashboardBuddha

        Interesting points…but I prefer my crazy to be fresh killed.

  • littlebigdaddy

    Wow, you wouldn't think 19-year olds would have to spend months trying to conceive. Maybe Levi gets bad whiskey dick.

    • Fare la Volpe

      It makes sense when you consider they were trying to make a butt baby.

      • horsedreamer_1

        You know who else was a butt-baby?

        • PristinePantalones

          Rush Limbaugh?

    • Guppy06

      You mean "wine cooler dick."

      • Gleem_McShineys

        Bartles & Shames

  • V572 Coif of Destiny

    Pontia, Plymout, Buic and Chrysle Johnston will pose next. And what kind of "service journalism" is that has no link to the Playboy pix?

    • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

      You left out Beemer, Audi and Peugot.

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        And Hummer.

        • V572 Coif of Destiny

          Didn't Hummer Johnston play shortstop for the Mets some years back?

        • riverside68

          Bumper sticker on a Dodge Power Wagon:

          If I wanted a Hummer, I would have asked your sister for one

    • Negropolis

      I laughed out loud at "Chrysle", because I can see some black girl naming her daughter that.

  • Indiepalin

    I wanna see the picture Newsweek is going to use for Bristol's cover story.

    • horsedreamer_1

      Her Pap Smear.

  • Ducksworthy

    Penis goes in. Penis goes out. Nobody knows why.

    • nounverb911

      Not even Bill O'Reilly.

      • http://www.kenlayisalive.org KenLayIsAlive

        Loofah goes in, Loofah goes out. Bill knows why.

    • EatsBabyDingos

      And all Bristol could say between the "in" and the "out" was "warggle arggle warggle."

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      Did we use to date?

    • riverside68

      Palin version:

      Penis goes in, baby comes out. Nobody knows why.

  • Fare la Volpe

    Five bucks says Levi and Mercede appear together next time around. They're just building the tension before they mount their assault.

    • Barb

      Ewww, nibbling siblings.

      • Fare la Volpe

        The family that lays together…

    • freakishlywrong

      Please refrain from using the words "Levi", "Mercede" and "mount" in the same post, Fare.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Sexytime!

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

      I think you are over-estimating the amount they've been offered by a magnitude of 5.

    • FlyOverGirl

      Well, Tripp does need a brother-cousin. And "Tension" prolly is the next in the line of Palin baby names.

      • PristinePantalones

        Is Tripp the one who just had a kid? Or is Tripp the kid? Jeez, how does anyone keep track of this Klan O'Dimbo's names anyway?

        • FlyOverGirl

          Track is the dumb fuck son of Sarah.

          Tripp is the doomed child of Bristol and Levi.

          Trig is Sarah's prop.

          I have wasted a brain cell knowing this shit.

          • PristinePantalones

            Thank you. So, no word on the new Miracle Spawn's name yet? Track, Tripp, Trig. Got it.

          • RavenRant

            Kyla Grace. Which I only know because of Wonkette!

          • PristinePantalones

            I'm crushed. Whatever happened to Twat, Twee, Tring, Drink, and all the OTHER wonderful names we proposed? Have they no conscience? Have they no CARE? Hmph. New Wifey Blondie or Britta or Jutta or whatever her name is must have Some Influence over DipMyDick, or whatever his name is. Track, right? This one's Track.

          • RavenRant

            I'm thinking there was a fight about the name, which the wife won. The kid will feel like an oddball at family reunions, and normal everywhere else.

    • riverside68

      My money is on the ass-ault

    • fuflans

      and look how well that turned out in 'tis pity she's a whore', 'fool for love' and alabama.

  • ThankYouJeebus

    Dear Penthouse Forum,
    I never thought this would happen to me, but….

    • Grief_Lessons

      …recently while on a trip to Alaska I stopped at a 7-11 to buy some wine coolers and a corndog. On exiting the store I noticed behind the dumpster…

      • Lionel[redacted]Esq

        …. a young woman smoking meth. She looked at me and the wine coolers and said, "My Mom was almost VP of that America Country down there. Give me a bite of that corndog and a cooler, and I'll make it worth your while." She then came toward me . . .

        • riverside68

          undoing her bra with one hand, and taking out her teeth with the other . . .

          • PristinePantalones

            Horrified by her sagging, cavernous *upper* orifice, I flung the whole damn corndog and all the coolers at her and made good my escape. As I left, she hunched, drooling, over the corndog, tearing it asunder with shrieks that sounded vaguely like "Frick! Frack! Trick! …"

            She claimed she had a job for me, but I didn't stick around to find out. What's a "blow job," anyway?

  • HelmutNewton

    "What are the bitter, unemployed naked young people in Wasilla doing these days between meth come downs?"

    Robbing convenience stores?

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      Banks, if they're from Florida…

    • LowProfileinGA

      Trashing cabins?

  • hagajim

    She's fixated on Levi's penis because she was rising it…protected of course – because you can't have incestuous babies, even though incest is OK – in Alaska.

  • x111e7thst

    Does Mercede have her brothers name tattooed on her back or am I imagining this?

    • tcaalaw

      Well, only sort of. Her tramp stamp actually reads in full: Levi's Cousin Joe's Uncle Bill's Daddy's Girl. Laser tattoo removal technology hasn't reached Alaska yet.

  • freakishlywrong

    Oh. And once again, thank you, Walnuts. Thank you for loosing this hillbilly event horizon upon us from whence it appears there will be no escape.

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      Sorta OT but — hell, you mentioned WALNUTS and "trite" so here goes — as of today when I checked, (out of masochistic backsliding I'll admit), WALNUTS' daughter still thinks she can write.

      • horsedreamer_1

        I like that she has started to fall into the GOP line, going with the veiled "both sides do it" &/or "people in Washington" motif.

        Because, in the last three years, Obama hasn't been dealing with divided government, first in his own party, then with the Teabagging House post-November 2010.

      • freakishlywrong

        Ugh. Like Megs has anything to worry about. All 24 of their houses are made out of money. Hell, she craps money. It's about as genuine as Douchborogh's come to Jesus moment where he just now is discovering the wealth disparity in this fucked up country, and also claims it really started getting bad "about 3 years ago".

        • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

          Keeping in mind… she's the same whiz kid who felt the Carter–>>Reagan presidencies were before her time since she "wasn't born yet." That RealTime/Maher show appearance settled for me how shallow her historic frame of reference was, and remains so.

    • PristinePantalones

      Everytime I see or hear anything about the Hillbilly Harpy or her misbegotten spawn, I curse McCain, again and again.

    • RavenRant

      "Hillbilly event horizon." Fair warning, I will be stealing and using this whenever possible.

  • PuckStopsHere

    So, let me see if I have this straight: Bristol was totally fucked up on wine coolers for months? And the whole time she was being taken advantage of?

    • Guppy06

      Where does the Archangel Gabriel fit into all this?

  • horsedreamer_1

    Here we go a Wasilling…

  • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

    Because the only way to get anyone to listen to you is to take your clothes off.

    Why doesn't this work for men?

    • Fare la Volpe

      You've obviously never read Regretsy. A "Towel Mike" post sees their numbers soar.

    • Radiotherapy┬«

      Wieners?

    • 102415

      It works. Just not the way they would like it to.

    • RavenRant

      What little chance Mercede ever had to be taken seriously is now forever dead, thanks to the spank pix.

      For SENATOR Scott Brown, naked spank pix didn't hurt his credibility as a 'serious politician' one iota.

  • http://grandpaboy.blogspot.com/ seppdecker

    This is still better than Deadliest Catch.

    • SexySmurf

      More like Deadliest Snatch.

      • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

        This was the original title for "Sarah Palin's Alaska."

    • nounverb911

      Doesn't that depend on what you catch from Mercede?

      • Fare la Volpe

        The Mercede Delta is littered with crabs.

        • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

          Triangle of Death?

  • aguacatero

    All Obama's fault!

  • EatsBabyDingos

    Trying to conceive for months, they finally got "Sex for Dummies." And I still wonder how a pregnancy occurred.

  • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

    When I was a teenager, I too spent months trying to conceive. But apparently the phrase "it takes two to tango" is rooted in a certain reality.

    • http://www.kenlayisalive.org KenLayIsAlive

      She should have spent more time trying to conceive of a life of not being a slut.

  • DahBoner

    "Naked Levi Johnston’s Sister Now Also Naked And Yelling At Bristol Palin"

    From a booth at a Tucson area Denny's:

    "HENNNNNNG???"

    • horsedreamer_1

      He surveys the scene, marking time 'til he shall have shuffled from this orb, the papers's stories of his life encomia, obliterating from memory any reference to this greatest mistake, this palling [sic] around with glorified tourists.

      • DahBoner

        And don't forget about clipping coupons good for 15 cents off Orange Juice.

        Today's Wednesday, after all…

        • horsedreamer_1

          "WALNUTS just thought it was a Wednesday".

  • Ducksworthy

    They both have the same tramp stamp. "Insert coins below"

  • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

    So now we finally learn why they call it "Seward's Folly".
    ~

  • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

    You know who else had to pose nude in order to get national press coverage?

    • nounverb911

      Burt Reynolds?

    • nounverb911

      Broadway Joe Namath and his mustache?

    • SexySmurf

      Scott Brown?

    • elviouslyqueer

      Vanessa Williams?

    • HelmutNewton

      Jessica Cutler?

    • Preferred Customer

      Josef Stalin?

    • V572 Coif of Destiny

      Vladimir Putin?

    • horsedreamer_1

      Erin Andrews?

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

      Eva Braun?

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      John Lennon and Yoko Ono?

      • PristinePantalones

        Dood, that was *inter*national.

    • GOPCrusher

      Jessica Hahn?

    • PristinePantalones

      Bambi Bembenek?

  • Come here a minute

    I can't conceive of who wants to know about these people.

    • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

      You don't want to learn more about America's royalty?

      • PristinePantalones

        If this is what passes for royalty in America, royalty elsewhere in the world will resign en masse and demand to be known henceforth as "plebes."

        • RavenRant

          This could be a clever plan. Shame those freeloaders off their thrones!

          • PristinePantalones

            I like ze way you zink.

  • teebob2000

    Just… eww…

  • Redhead

    I actually care less about Mercede than I do about the Palins.

    • 102415

      I think Mercede will make a terrific governor.

      • Lionel[redacted]Esq

        She is at least as qualified as Sarah Palin…, and she doesn't quit half way through things.

        At least that is what the hockey team is saying

        • 102415

          Exactly. And she's not knocked up.

          • PristinePantalones

            Which makes her smarter than Sarah, Bristol, or the other salad-shooter-cooter, MishMash BatShitKrayZMann.

    • GOPCrusher

      What about the minutes of entertainment that is provided by watching this electronic catfight?

  • Callyson

    The People link has a photo of the cover of Playboy. Never mind the Levi Johnson sister interview or the photos of naked chicks, I'm reading it for the Steve Buscemi interview…

    • Barb

      Love me some Steve Buscemi!

    • Preferred Customer

      It's helpful that they subcaption that "Steve Buscemi: The Interview," because otherwise I would have assumed it was a pictorial.

      Which, ew.

      But! Still possibly more appealing than Mercede.

      • V572 Coif of Destiny

        Naked Buscemi is actually available on HBO's very serious show that no one watches, "Boardwalk Empire." That may be why no one watches it.

        • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

          It's coming back for another season, so somebody's watching it. I don't think Buscemi was ever naked last season. It is actually "watchable" for the glorious period detail, but the "drama" part is flawed. All of Nucky's empire-building accomplishments are in his past, and Buscemi spent every episode being irritated with everyone else, and with the wrong accent. However, as with "Game Of Thrones," I feel like if HBO is going to spend all that money and I'm paying for the damned premium package, I might as well feast my eyes on all the medieval and flapper whoring.

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    So, sex is apparently the one thing that a Palin doesn't quit half way through?

    • Negropolis

      I don't know. Isn't drunk sex the ultimate cop-out kind of sex?

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    I live in the State of Washington. I've known people from Alaska. In my experience, most of them are not named for consumer products or by randomly stabbing at a dictionary. Is this just a Wasilla sort of thing?

    • SexySmurf

      As a current Washingtonian and transplant from Montana, I can tell you that all the good, liberal, normal people from Idaho, Alaska, and Montana eventually run screaming to Seattle, and leaving behind a concentrated population of hillbillies in those states.

    • proudgrampa

      Dear Lionel –

      I am from Wasilla, and I resent your implication that our residents name our children for "consumer products."

      Sincerely,

      Glad Downy Swiffer Cascade

  • EatsBabyDingos

    People who say "like totally" should be like totally shot. Fer sher!

    Valley Gurls eating yellow snow. I miss Zappa.

    • Steverino247

      Go see ZPZ when they tour near you again. They even played Billy the Mountain and substituted Sarah Palin for the original LAPD chief.

      • PristinePantalones

        Were they good? As good as?

        • Steverino247

          Dweezil is technically perfect. He's only half Frank, of course, but you can close your eyes and not be able to tell the difference. Personally, I think he was initially trying too hard to sound exactly the same and forgot to have fun, too. He's past that point and does real well. They did the entire Apostrophe album when I saw them at the San Diego House of Blues (a great venue for that) and they had a tape of Frank playing lead and the rest of the band played like he was there with them. He was, too, in a way. Very cool show. He came down after the show and signed autographs, etc. Everybody was thanking him for bringing Frank back. It's emotional for him but he wouldn't be any other way.

    • PristinePantalones

      I have every Zappa album EVAH on the Pod. Take it out to the garden and rock out to Titties and Beer on high!

  • PubOption

    Mercede, who reportedly has had a boob job, is criticizing Bristol for having plastic surgery?

  • http://whatisawatthedevolution.blogspot.com imissopus

    Hubba hubba barf.

  • ttommyunger

    Why are the rantings of these Trailer Twats being reported? Oh, right. We're a Country of morons…

    • EatsBabyDingos

      Yes, a great choir of Diet Coke drinking, granny smith eating, idiots. A veritable Moron Tab and Apple Choir.

      • ttommyunger

        Well said!

    • PristinePantalones

      Celebrity is news, these days, don'tcha know? Get famous for being famous. Or notorious. Makes no never mind.

      • ttommyunger

        We are doomed.

    • RavenRant

      Just wait till the Octomom, Casey Anthony, and Snooki weigh in on this.

      It will rival the Mermaid Tavern times the Algonquin Round Table times infinity!

      • ttommyunger

        No time for snark! Another Blonde is missing in Aruba!

  • Serolf_Divad

    + "S"
    There… I fixed it. Every time I read that girl's name it's like an article that was cut off mid sentence.

    • LettucePrey

      Eh, I'm pronouncing it "Mer-Sed" in my head.

      • PristinePantalones

        There's a city in California by that name. Merced. Looks like Mercede's mother couldn't decide whether to name the spawn after a fancy car or a funky city.

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    Mercede is one "s" short of a trademark infringement lawsuit.

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    In the interview that KBJ refuses to let besmirch her intellect, Mercede publicly tars the last, unspoiled Palin by claiming that Sarah forced Track into the Army to avoid having his drug abuse feasted upon by the Chattering Class during the Republican Convention.

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    Remind me if I ever move to Alaska and have triplet daughters to name them Lexu, Volv and BM

    • RavenRant

      Lexu would make a great science fiction name. I'm afraid little BM might have a smidgen of trouble in the schoolyard, tho.

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    It would be interesting to see Mercede's birth certificate to see if it was a typo or if she is just such an idiot she can't spell her own name.

  • sezme

    Does she even know how babby is formed?

  • Angry_Marmot

    Somebody wishes they'd cut Levi's article off mid-sentence.

  • Pragmatist2

    Seriously, these people give trailer trash a bad name.

  • RedneckMuslin

    Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!

  • horsedreamer_1
  • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

    "Hey Levi, mind if guys jerk off to nude pics of your Sis, since you're nominally famous?"

    "Go for it!"

    • RavenRant

      He didn't mind guys jerking off to pictures of him, so why should she be special?

      • PristinePantalones

        See, I like that about Levi. He's an equal-opportunity oppressor. You might say he was catholic in his oppressiveness.

        • RavenRant

          To be fair to Levi, he hasn't forced any children into the sexy fun and games, so the term 'catholic' is unnecessarily insulting.

          • PristinePantalones

            To be fair to the English language, I was using "catholic" in the other two senses of the word:
            1. Of broad or liberal scope; comprehensive
            2. Including or concerning all humankind; universal

          • RavenRant

            Yes, I know. I was attempting humor. Always a bad sign when that has to be explained.

            At least I'm not on stage with the sound of crickets instead of laughter.

          • PristinePantalones

            Ha! My nerves, they are nervous anaconda Catholics have grown so sensitive to the haha lately, what with diddling kiddies in every state and nation of late. I shall return to being thoroughly offensive and obnoxious now.

  • FakaktaSouth

    If you are going to put "posed nude" in a bold red and I click on it, I wanna see some nude posing. That was a bummer.

    • GOPCrusher

      * SPOILER ALERT! *

  • Pat_Pending

    I've heard rumors that babies come out of your vagina!

    • PristinePantalones

      Still doesn't explain how babby is formed.

  • Steverino247

    Why is there not a tornado hitting that area as I write this? With all that bait lying around, something has to give.

    (And I love what you guys have been doing to this so far, folks. Keep it up!)

  • http://www.gurukalehuru.wordpress.com gurukalehuru

    No link, no pink

  • AJWjr.

    And she hasn't updated her own blog since July 4th? You'd think she'd be oh so proud of this latest career development.

  • spinozasgod

    a planned unplanned preganacy…what a cunning plan.

    • 102415

      Why not? She wanted to be a welfare raccoon and it has paid off handsomely.

      • PristinePantalones

        And instead of buckets full of berry bugs with a soupcon of dead rat in it, she actually got Teh Munniez.

  • mavenmaven

    And to think, in 20 years she may bring down another politician.

  • http://howtosavetheworld.ca/ BZ1

    was it Gomer Pyle who said: "dumb is as dumb does"; probably not, but it applies…

  • GortRay

    The Palins have the "T" thing going(Turd, Trudge, Tarp), so maybe Mercede can grab the misspelled auto names, like Volkwagen, Chryler or Aton Martin?

    • 102415

      Porch?

  • SilverTsunami

    People, where is your compassion? Can't you see that the Johnston clan was so poor that they couldn't afford the "s" for Mercedes?

  • fuflans

    this is pathetic even for people magazine.

    we can't come close to the UK for riots OR scandal rags.

    • sezme

      This is pathetic even for Playboy.

  • SenileAgitation

    Can't we just be grateful for more of this cashing in = nudity trend? Meghan, you're up! Oh, and many thanks to your Dad for bringing this tribe of crank skanks and tool tasters to our never-ending attention!

  • Negropolis

    Mercede is just pissed that Levi broke hillbilly law and tradition by knocking up someone unrelated to him. Tripp was supposed to be her baby, see? Levi is her man, and Bristol had to come in and do something all gross and weird like taking away her fuck-brother.