Newsweek Puts Another Insane Shrill GOP Female Politician On the Cover

but how to make the journalism monies these days?“Congratulations” or whatever you say these days to shameless political tabloids when they use a horrorporn photo of Michele Bachmann’s vacant stare to terrorize America’s grocery store checkout lines. Here is the strange part: this is a photo of Michele Bachmann totally asleep! Haha, just kidding, we do not know what she is doing here, but that probably isn’t far off. She is most likely just enjoying the morphine drip and fistful of “migraine pills” that she is always mainlining on any given day. She is also apparently “full of rage” in this photo according to the caption, which strangely is probably the only emotion we would not attribute to Michele in this photo. Our first thought was more like, “brain dead.”

Oh right, and here is your Sexist Sarah Palin Newsweek Cover for the “compare and contrast” essay.

Uh, and some pointless earnest commentary from WaPo:

Where on earth is she looking this time? [Bachmann advisor Ed] Rollins has the candidate under control. He now has to get this aspect of her image under control. It’s as if someone is dangling a treat (or maybe it’s a line of Scripture) to get her to look at the camera the way a photographer tries to get a kid to focus on class picture day. The Newsweek piece by Lois Romano delves into Bachmann’s status as queen of the Tea Party movement and how her history contradicts many of her policy ideas. There’s no denying that Bachmann firmly believes what she believes. Some might think she’s crazy because of it. Cover photos like this one help to cement that image.

[TwitPic/ Washington Post]

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  • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    The caption should be: "The Shocker."

    • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

      You mad? bad!
      ~

    • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

      Two in the…

      Oh God, I just can't bring myself to do it with that thing staring at me!

    • Barrelhse

      This is my favorite story from the category "The Shocker". http://www.rotten.com/library/language/the-finger

    • DahBoner

      The caption should be: "The Shocker. You'd Have to Be Crazy AND Gay to Tap This"

    • http://assistantatlas.blogspot.com/ assistantatlas

      Or maybe "The Perils of Too Much Plastic Surgery."

    • http://fontofliberty.blogspot.com/ Rarian Rakista

      I am sure she has a Koch or two up her.

      • Barrelhse

        Yeah, old DP Bachmann. We used to call her "Fingerbowl" back in Junior High.

    • http://www.wonkette.com Dr_pangloss

      It's full of Stars.

  • nounverb911

    The Horror! The Horror!

  • DaRooster

    That bitch just CANNOT look at the fucking camera!

    • FNMA

      Fucking contraption will steal her soul.
      Petty theft in this instance.

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      That's true for all vampires.

    • hagajim

      That's because she is afraid it will steal her soul…oh, wait, too late.

    • LabRodent

      Solution: Have two Cameras take her picture at the same time. One in the distance where she actually looks and a fake one in front of her as a prop.

    • http://www.kenlayisalive.org KenLayIsAlive

      That's just how she is used to Marcus looking at her.

      "Sorry Michele, I, uh, have to work late at the clinic again tonight." *averts eyes*

    • LetUsBray

      Too many bad experiences with little glass shards flying everywhere, and her mad, unblinking eyes unprotected.

    • PristinePantalones

      Her right eye is looking at it just fine! It's her left eye that's the problem.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    They nailed the crazy eyes part. Looks a little more insane than usual.

    • Barrelhse

      Wheeeeeeeeeeee!!

    • http://www.vinoverve.com Maman

      That's the botox. She looks constant surprised.

      • PristinePantalones

        I thought it was the eye surgery. All the pubbies seem to get that lid lift to give them that "kraykray eye" look. They think it makes them look young and alert, when actually it makes them look downright insane.

  • nounverb911

    Looks like someone just shoved her titanium spine up her butt.

    • SaneCatLady

      Whoops! Just found that gerbil Marcus lost!

      • nounverb911

        I thought that was on Donald Trump's head.

    • PristinePantalones

      I'm just not buying her "titanium spine" bullshit. She runs screaming and crying from old lady nuns, for crisake. Real brave, Mishmash!

  • elviouslyqueer

    Oh you meanies, LEAVE SHELLEY ALONE!!11!!!!!11!!!*

    *This comment is approximately 1,000% ironic

    • Guppy06

      Blood libel!

  • freakishlywrong

    Jesus Christ. Jared Laughner's psycho mug shot is less scary.

    • nounverb911

      And he looks more intelligent.

    • MissusBarry

      Well, I kinda feel better that he popped into somebody else's mind, too.

  • BlueMonkeh

    Ugly is as ugly does.

  • teebob2000

    On Morning Joe they likened the photo to this…
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0405422/

    • hagajim

      Not even close!

    • Kidneys4Sale

      I was gonna go more with the snaggle-tooth shark in Strange Wilderness, but that works, too.

    • AJWjr.

      Thinking more like this.

    • SaneCatLady

      I was thinking more like this: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081505/

    • Limeylizzie

      MrLimeylizzie worked on that movie and we have a huge bathtowel, which I use frequently, with that picture on it, does this mean that I am wrapping my body in Michele on a regular basis?

      • BerkeleyBear

        No, he looks happy and hopeful – she just looks insane.

    • http://fontofliberty.blogspot.com/ Rarian Rakista

      I was thinking more of Charles Manson during a parole hearing.
      http://bit.ly/oEdbJm

      • PristinePantalones

        I'm so upfisting that. He really does look like MishMash.

    • Kgprophet

      Michelle's the 50 year old virgin!

    • PristinePantalones

      Oh, no, that guy looks sweet and nice and inoffensive, geeze. Bachmannitis, OTOH, looks like she's millimeters from having a bird spring out of her skull screaming "Cuckoo!" repeatedly till she bashes it back in with a baseball bat.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    There’s no denying that Bachmann firmly believes what she believes.

    The quality of prose that made the Washington Post what it is today.

    • http://zvibleindmeis.tumblr.com/ SpurningBeer

      Tautologies are tautological.

    • DahBoner

      "Bachmann firmly believes what she believes. "

      That's just the estrogen talking.

  • Boredw/Gravitas

    "Look deeply into my eyes…. when I snap my fingers, you will bark like a dog."

    • DaRooster

      "And take it in the ass like your husband."

      • PristinePantalones

        She doesn't need hypnosis for that.

  • MissusBarry

    That creepy-vacant look reminds me of Jared Loughner, just a little skinnier and with eyebrows.

    • hagajim

      Maybe Jared was one of her foster kids?

      • MissusBarry

        It would explain a lot.

  • LabRodent

    Newsweek smeared Michelle Bachmann by publishing a picture she supplied and posed for.
    Liberal Rag.

    • mourningnmerica

      The only smears that 'chele has a problem with are of the Government paid pap variety.

    • petehammer

      This falls right into the Newt Gingrich "you can't quote what I said!"

      DAMN YOU FACTS AND HISTORY!

    • dancesw_cougars

      That tricksy photographer. He said "just smile naturally", and we did precious, oh yes we did.

  • nounverb911

    I thought Marcus Bachmannn was the "Queen of Rage".

    • Native_of_SL_UT

      He's actually a "Silver Fox", which he apparently thinks is code for "gay".
      From a New Yorker piece:

      Marcus Bachmann plopped down on the seat next to me, in the back of the plane. He pointed at my laptop and asked if he could take a look. “All I want to know is what they’re saying about me,” he said. “Newsweek came up with the word ‘silver fox.’ Tell me what ‘silver fox’ means.”

      “Do you want me to tell you honestly?” I asked.

      “Oh, don’t tell me it’s something gay!” he said. “Because I’ve been called that before.” Marcus is a psychologist who runs a clinic that employs people Michele described in 2006 as “Biblical world-view counsellors,” who “reach out and try to bring the medicine of the Gospel to come and heal people.”

      • GregComlish

        Oh what a gem! I can't believe that is the first I've heard of this.

        "Mac OS X? Never heard of it. Probably some sort of gay operating system for gay people which I would know nothing about because I am definitely not gay. I run windows which compliments my innate heterosexuality and biblical world view."

  • Ohforcripessake

    "I am so high!"

  • hagajim

    Is it just me…or does she look like the fat kid in school and someone is dangling a Twinkie just out of reach….those crazy, crazy eyes.

  • Goonemeritus

    That’s her just woke up from a fugue state clutching a length of pipe covered in someone else’s blood look.

    • mog253

      I hate it when that happens.

  • BlueMonkeh

    Oh, and Crazy Lady looks crazy. Scoop!

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    I'm pretty sure that is the look she gives whenever her husband "accidentally" tries to have the buttsex with her.

    • HobbesEvilTwin

      I'm pretty sure the only buttsex Marcus has is with underage boys. Not that there's anyth– oh, wait, yes there is a lot wrong with that.

    • Guppy06

      "Remember, 'Chele: Jesus says you have to submit!"

  • samsuncle

    Have you noticed how her eyes seem to follow you around the room?

    • Poindexter718

      Except when I have a camera pointed at her…

    • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Johnny-Appletruth/133951326629923?sk=wall deanbooth

      Odd — I've noticed how her eyes don't follow me around the room.

    • Barrelhse

      Yes, and we're triplets.

  • freakishlywrong

    Doesn't that just scream "Presidential Portrait"? Or maybe it just screams.

    • nappyduggs

      Didn't you?

    • AJWjr.

      Edvard Munch wept.

    • DahBoner

      President of her mental ward.

    • YasserArraFeck

      Actually, it totally screams "Get the restraints in here!! NOW!!!"

    • PristinePantalones

      More Munch than anything.

  • littlebigdaddy

    But how does this affect Sarah Palin?

    • nounverb911

      Makes her look almost sane?

    • Redhead

      Newsweek Cover libel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

    My dog gets the same look on her face when I say "Biscuit?"

    • Geminisunmars

      Mine looks that way when he hasta go out.

    • gullywompr

      I was just about to say, she looks like she was lifted from a painting of dogs playing poker

  • DashboardBuddha

    Wow…the line between a smile and a grimace is thinner than I thought.

  • Geminisunmars

    should be Queen of Strange.

    • neiltheblaze

      Czarina, even!

    • Guppy06

      Well, it's certainly strange to Marcus…

  • EatsBabyDingos

    I've seen more life in death masks. Can you Botox a whole skull?

  • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

    Welcome to reality, sometimes its hard.

    • DahBoner

      That pussycat done sailed.

    • Barrelhse

      Do you ever find it hard in the morning?

      • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

        Almost always. But not when I have to look at something like the above. That's a guaranteed shriveler.

  • WhatTheHeck

    Not so much a Queen, more like the Joker's wild.

    • dr_giraud

      She's confused because 3 devils just came up.

    • Angry_Marmot

      "Everything anybody ever valued or struggled for… It's all a monstrous, demented gag. So why can't you see the funny side? Why aren't you laughing?"

  • DaRooster

    "I love Oxycontin!"
    .
    .
    .
    (So does Michelle)

  • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

    Well folks, now we know what she looks like without makeup.

    And CGI.

  • MissusBarry

    Wonder if they 'shopped out the drool.

  • http://whatthefuckhasgopdonesofar.com/ Jerry Fjord

    This is VERY good news for Thad McCotter!

    • nounverb911

      Who?

      • http://whatthefuckhasgopdonesofar.com/ Jerry Fjord

        Aww, nertz!

    • Negropolis

      There is no such thing as good news for Thad McCotter. Not ever.

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    This is the youngest and healthiest Ozzy Osbourne has looked in years!

    • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

      Crazy Train…

      • Guppy06

        Trains are communist! More like "Crazy Sheburban"

  • V572 Coif of Destiny

    That was the easy part. Now take a jouney deep into Miche1e's brain:

    http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2011/08/15/110

    Warning: Not safe for the faint of heart. Involves statements like “Jefferson Davis and John C. Calhoun understood the Constitution better than did Abraham Lincoln and Daniel Webster.”

    And cargo pants. On Shelley.

    • SorosBot

      She's worse than we thought; among other things she follows a preacher who doesn't want to take us back to the 1950s or the 19th Century, but all the way back to the 13th Century:

      Schaeffer’s film series consists of ten episodes tracing the influence of Christianity on Western art and culture, from ancient Rome to Roe v. Wade. In the films, Schaeffer—who has a white goatee and is dressed in a shearling coat and mountain climber’s knickers—condemns the influence of the Italian Renaissance, the Enlightenment, Darwin, secular humanism, and postmodernism. He repeatedly reminds viewers of the “inerrancy” of the Bible and the necessity of a Biblical world view. “There is only one real solution, and that’s right back where the early church was,” Schaeffer tells his audience.

      • V572 Coif of Destiny

        Stinkin Renaissance is the cause of all of today’s problems. Let’s all go out in the desert and eat locusts and wild honey until we have visions or get stung to death.

        • SorosBot

          And what's with that anti-Biblical process of "sanitation" to keep the Black Death from spreading instead of prayer?

          (It's also kind of ironic coming from a born-again fundamentalist Protestant, since without the Renaissance there would be no Martin Luther and they'd still be Catholic).

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        "God damn the Renaissance!!!"

      • BeWoot

        And of course, the funny part is, at the time of "the early church" the Bible had not yet been invented.

      • horsedreamer_1

        Sounds like T. Herman Zwiebel.

    • BeWoot

      "Shoot, aim, score!"

      Thanks for that link, Coif. I feel much better now.

      • NorthStarSpanx

        If Ed Rollins, as Bachmann’s campaign manager has the cajones to speak ill of his own:

        Ross Perot (“a paranoid lunatic on an ego trip”)

        And of other 'powerful' women:

        Arianna Huffington (“the most ruthless, unscrupulous, and ambitious person I’d met in thirty years in national politics”).

        When's he going to roll out that high powered perception on the outdoor Michelle Bachmann, Sarah Palin?

  • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

    The War Criminal Post and Newsweek are still joined at the hip, aren't they?

    (Or somewhere around there.)
    ~

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      No. See "Daily Beast."

      • V572 Coif of Destiny

        Ah, well, Newsweek needed a shot of credibility from Tina Brown. Look what she did for the New Yorker.

      • http://ifthethunderdontgetya.blogspot.com/ ifthethunderdontgetya

        Doh!

        Well, you see, the donkey cart carrying that news out to Ohio fell off the Appalachian trail near Big Savage Mountain, and that's my story.

        P.S. They don't seem to have gotten any better (they, referring to both the War Criminal Post and Newsweek).

        P.P.S. This is the P.S. I was going with, until I forgot:

        IACI 36.89 Last -1.45
        ~

    • Barrelhse

      They ought to be joined at the wrists and ankles.

  • http://Wonkette.com MLHencken

    Caption: "Can you see my skull yet?"

    • nounverb911

      Unfortunately, no.

    • Angry_Marmot

      Michele Bachmann: the memento mori of popular democracy.

  • Angry_Marmot

    This is what happens when Good Housekeeping hires Ralph Steadman to do the cover.

    • V572 Coif of Destiny

      Ah, yes

    • Negropolis

      And, Ralph Wiggum, also.

  • dr_giraud

    If this is the best they have, attendance is gonna be way down at Madame Tussauds.

  • mavenmaven

    OK, Michele, you can take the butt plug out now.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Invisible dildo, ACTIVATE!

      • PristinePantalones

        My version says "Voodoo dildo, MY ASS!"

        And it's a cop saying it.

    • AJWjr.

      Is that all that's keeping the crazy inside? In that case, leave it in!

      • Gleem_McShineys

        Yes! Keep the Bachmanntorum in.

      • http://fontofliberty.blogspot.com/ Rarian Rakista

        Maybe its the same butt plug they used on the island in the Lost Finale.

        God damn that pissed me off, magical effin' glowing butt plug after 6 seasons.

    • PristinePantalones

      I don't think it's gonna be that easy to separate Marcus from Michele.

  • freakishlywrong

    Have the conservatards started whinging about the librul media yet? Because one of their candidates looks, (is) certifiable? I can't read that shit anymore, I really can't.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      Of course!

  • neiltheblaze

    So the mainstreaming of Shelly "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann continues apace. Thanks again, Newsweek, for all that you do!

  • gullywompr

    I think she's prayed her brain away

    • Barrelhse

      Bless her heart.

  • Texan_Bulldog

    This is the picture I'm going to show my kids to prove their is a bogey[wo]man who will come out from under their beds if they don't eat their damn vegetables!

    • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

      'Vegetables" are a liberal conspiracy to have government control our lives.

    • http://fontofliberty.blogspot.com/ Rarian Rakista

      I am pretty sure they would believe you that this woman would eat their souls too.

    • PristinePantalones

      That might cross the line into child abuse. I mean, *I'm* scared shitless of her and I'm a tough Old.

  • smitallica

    She's not entirely full of rage. There's plenty of room in there for stupid.

    • PristinePantalones

      I thought the deal was that among all those sinusoid spaces crammed to the brim with Stupid, the only other thing that managed to survive was a thick, streaming clot of rage. Sort of like blood seeping from a heart, or peanut-butter-and-jelly-in-a-jar, hm.

  • SayItWithWookies

    What the freakin' hell — did they do that on purpose, or was this simply the best shot she took? It looks like they joined the DNA of Gerald Ford and that Colon Cleanse lady and then electrocuted her.

    • Whatever

      Damn it!!! Now I'll be stuck with that image all day.

  • Sue4466

    The problem with Bachmann is not the Newsweek cover. Really.

  • widestanceroman

    Usually, this look is accompanied by a whispered: "dude, can you tell?"

  • kissawookiee

    Does anybody remember Star Trek: The Motion Picture and the endless hours of slack-jawed-gaping-at-the-wonders-of-VGer "acting" it foisted upon the world? I think Michele just busted out the LaserDisc player.

  • x111e7thst

    How many facelifts has this woman had?

    • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

      All of them, Katie!

      (Sorry, but somebody had to say it).

    • DahBoner

      How deep is the ocean, grasshopper?

    • 102415

      Not enough. Not nearly enough.
      Anyway botox is now being used for migranes. Like birth control pills were used to regulate your period. Ironically.

      • PristinePantalones

        I don't think the kind she gets are amendable to Botox. Visual aura and stuff.

        • 102415

          I spent an evening with a doctor who runs a migraine clinic who uses botox. According to her it's good for everything!

    • LetUsBray

      Hitler? (Sorry, reflex action when someone asks a question around here)

      • PristinePantalones

        I've fallen prey to it a few times myself.

    • MrFizzy

      Scrape it off and grow a scab.

  • http://www.youtube.com/user/FlipOffResearch FlipOffResearch

    It looks like Bachmann's discovered my new hobby of badly posing for pictures.

  • metamarcisf

    Should be sold in a plain brown wrapper so as not to scare the children.

  • Oblios_Cap

    They still publish Newsweek?

    That woman is Dorian Gray's picture.

  • SorosBot

    This is all Reagan's fault; before he sent the mental patients out on the street Michele would be getting the treatment she needs and pose no danger to others.

    • NorthStarSpanx

      And Obama's Big Government fault too, if it weren't for Fanny or Freddie, she'd be homeless AND crazy.

  • gullywompr

    Hate to steal from a previous wonketteer, but it bears repeating….

    "Water, Michelle W-A-T-E-R."

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    Crazy EyZ!!!

  • mourningnmerica

    Objectively speaking, that may be the most disturbing, most illuminating picture of Michele to date.

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    One Weird Trick To Erase Credibility

    • Barrelhse

      Dermatologists Hate Her!

  • http://thethingsrepublicanshate.com/ Chillwaver

    "Give me your best crazy!"
    — Newsweek photographer

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    It kind of looks like a picture you would take by yourself with your phone.

    • Guppy06

      needz moar duckface

    • Tundra Grifter

      JZ: I would disagree because she's wearing clothes.

      • LetUsBray

        And no dookie in the toilet bowl, either.

  • MozakiBlocks

    Where on earth is she looking this time?

    Toward Jesus of course!!

  • fartknocker

    You know what's scarier? Her and Gubnor Big Hair standing on the dias at the RNC and accepting the nomination for POTUS and VPOTUS.

    • HistoriCat

      You know what's even scarier? "I Michele Bachmann do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of President of the United States …"

  • Beowoof

    She looks crazy in that picture true, however the real crazy part is she approved that picture for the cover. Now that is one crazy beootch

  • Buckminster

    Somewhere, tiny children are trembling at the thought that this monster might be hiding in their closet.

    MOMMY, I"M SCARED!!!!!!!!!

  • James Michael Curley

    "Sittin' and starin',
    Outa the hotel window,
    Gotta tip they're,
    Bustin' the door in again."

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    Black hole sun, here she comes!!
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mbBbFH9fAg&ob

    • Steverino247

      Good one. I like the take off on that song "Asshole son" which is very funny. No idea where to find a copy, though.

    • flamingpdog

      At least now we know what became of Michelle and Marcus's 25 foster children.

  • AJWjr.

    Say what you will, but even she and $arah weren't batshit crazy enough to show up to Goodhair's event over the weekend.

  • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

    As I watch the Dow and my dreams of retirement sink under the weight of credit downgrades, I recall the words of Michele Bachmann:

    “I will not vote to increase the debt ceiling,” she says in the commercial. “It goes completely contrary to common sense and how I grew up in Iowa.”

    if the Demoncrats can't make her and the other Repubican TP'ers with their 98% victory dance absolutely OWN this downgrade, I'm voting for Sarah Palin's™ mannequin head.

    • LetUsBray

      You're assuming Democrats developing backbones at some point. Don't hold yer breath.

  • SaintRond

    That cunt.

  • spinozasgod

    maybe she's afraid the camera will steal her soul…..

    • Rosie_Scenario

      What soul?

    • DashboardBuddha

      Can't steal what she doesn't have. In order for someone to steal her soul, they'll have to break into Satan's safe deposit box.

  • http://archikvetch.blogspot.com/ archikvetch

    She's just enraptured by the rapture… or she's watching Kortney.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    Phyllis Diller has really let herself go.

  • http://www.wonkette.com WordSaladNation

    I was going to masturbate this year, but that image ruined my plans.

  • randcoolcatdaddy

    Dang … Charles Manson isn't aging well…

    • Steverino247

      Michele don't surf!

  • SheriffRoscoe

    Really? The photographer couldn't get her to soften those eyes and unclench that smile for a split second by telling her the funniest racist joke he's ever heard? It's like Newsweek WANTS us all saying mean things about her.

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    With the fat face and heavy mascara doe-eyes, she looks like Veronica from "Archie" as drawn by Jack Kirby.

  • Steverino247

    If Americans elect this insane woman to the office of President, I'm moving to Australia. Because that's the last place the radiation will reach, if "On the Beach" is correct. Evangelicals will light this planet on fire to bring back Jesus. Every one of them will have that batshit crazy look on their faces, too.

  • baconzgood

    "….This is your brain on Tea-Party. Any questions?"

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    She is going to take our country back to something.

  • BlueStateLibel

    The eyes are the windows to the soul, are they not?

  • http://Wonkette.com ProudLibunatic

    Oh, Newsweek!
    Subtle, guys, subtle.
    Let's hope the rest of the country catches on.
    (We here have ALWAYS known she has the crazy!)

  • fuflans

    this is pleasing and terrifying all at once.

    sorta of like an evil clown movie.

    • SorosBot

      We all float down here…

    • Barrelhse

      Pennywhistle!

  • Redhead

    She's probably hoping she washed all the blood off http://www.theonion.com/articles/bachmann-says-un

  • http://fontofliberty.blogspot.com/ Rarian Rakista

    Take my money, take my money!

    Oh wait; you teabag cunt, you already did.

    Lost 30% of my 401k since this shit started.

    • finallyhappy

      I am ignoring all the stock market stuff- so I can think about where I can find a job now that I retired 2 years ago.

  • 5thstate

    "There’s no denying that Bachmann firmly believes what she believes. Some might think she’s crazy because of it. Cover photos like this one help to cement that image<i/>".

    Some might KNOW FOR A FACT that she's crayayayazeeeee because of facts and logic and reason and data and things which are mutually exclusive and not like each other which nonetheless Bachmann believes are identical or not depending on what that thing is that has to do with Jesus and homos and taxes and fetuses and socialism and Muslims and certain birth certificates
    I

  • Come here a minute

    Big deal — wake me up when she gets the cover of that real political kingmaker, Runner's World.

  • RocketNo9

    Seriously? Her handlers let that photo go through? Did they do it intentionally so they can immediately turn around and cry victim that their beloved cuntidate is being mistreated my Librul Media? Because anyone media savvy in the least is going to demand refusal rights on the photo before it goes.

  • DahBoner

    The photographer had to hold up a bag of gold coins and jingle it to get her attention for the photo…

    • NorthStarSpanx

      It's back up to $1700 an ounce today, Beck must be dancing with glee and vindication.

  • zappadoo76

    Newsweek probably took about 20 photos of Queen Ragia, and picked the worst one, on purpose. Teh gays, who run the operation, did this as a service to themselves and their country. Thanks, gays!

  • Nostrildamus

    You that to her, damn you! You cut out her brain you bloody baboon!

  • RodneyBadger

    Yes, but does she get her tits out?

  • Eve8Apples

    I'm offended they photoshopped her horns and fangs out of that photo.

  • proudgrampa

    OK, I don't know what it's called, but that cover picture reminds me of an aunt who had a condition where she had to look sideways at everything, like her retinal focus was to the side. It was weird: she would look at her water glass while slicing her steak.

    Doesn't take away from the fact that Michele is a loon…

  • LiveToServeYa

    I'm happy about this picture. I want it on thousands of billboards across America. THE FACE OF THE TEA PARTY! Everyone will recognize the batshit insanity and pelt her face with hobobean cans or whatever. 'Crap in hand! Fling crap!'

  • NorthStarSpanx

    Bachmann quoted the manifesto, which describes an America where people “have civil and religious liberty, and here we can choose whatever profession we want, and no one tells us what profession we go in.” Her ancestors, she said, read those words and “sold everything and took their five children and bought boat tickets to come to Iowa.”

    Her Nordic fourfathers took a boat to Iowa?

    • ShaveTheWhales

      No, they took a boat to Wisconsin (almost equally tricky), moved to the Dakota wilderness, and fled back to less-wildernessy Iowa.

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg ProgressiveInga

    "That kinda hurts, Dr. Lechter…"
    Paul Krendler (played by Ray Liotta) post-lobotomy
    Hannibal, The Movie

  • http://wonkette.com/ Monsieur_Grumpe

    Oh great. When little kids see that picture in the grocery store checkout lane they’re going to start crying their asses off. Thanks Michele.

  • Tundra Grifter

    Over at Newsbusters (Comedy Central for Conservatives) they got their collective panties in a bunch over this foto.

    I don't think it's fair to blame Newsweek. I think she's giving us the only look she's got.

  • Neoyorquino

    LOLMichele – I can haz ur soul?

  • Gleem_McShineys

    One picture is worth a thousand mg of thorazine.

  • horsedreamer_1

    Nice try, Letterman, but putting on a wig & going over the gap-tooth with liquid paper isn't going to break your next Late Show character.

    Try again.

  • mumbly_joe

    Dear WaPo guy and also Slate morans: It's also possible that she looks crazy in every publicity photo and press conference she does, because she's just cold crazy. Sometimes a thing really just is what it looks like. Has anyone ever seen Bachman not looking like a lunatic? Does anybody have any evidence that this wasn't really and truly the best photo they had to work with?

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    My suggestion is some expensive, federally funded "posing for the camera without giving cooky looks" classes….

  • alzronnie

    Yup, there's a new crazy sheriff in town. Sorry Sarah, looks like you and Todd are going to have to go back to pulling that badger game on drunk salesman at the Days Inn.

  • PalinPussyPower

    I know in the past I've said that I would, because crazy in the head crazy in the bed.

    But I would not hit that. I would not. I've changed my mind. I would not.

    • Barrelhse

      Flip-flopper.

  • WVUer21

    That is Nightmare Fuel straight from the Bowels of Hell.

  • __kth__

    Wait, you buried the lede, which is that Newsweek still exists.

  • HelmutNewton

    Oh, you meanies! She's just high on "life"!

  • http://theaccidentalenvironmentalist.blogspot.com Hurricane Ali

    Q: Not that I mind or I am complaining or anything, but couldn't the photographer have found a less insane-looking photo of Bachmann for this Newsweek cover?

    A: Good luck with that.

  • Slim_Pickins

    No wonder the market crashed. This is likely the first thing Wall Streeters saw when they got off their trains this morning. Its enough to put anyone off their game…

  • PristinePantalones

    I want someone to explain to me why her right eye is staring straight at me (wif teh KrayZ) while her left eye is watching god or staring straight into the sun, or something.

  • lochnessmonster

    Yikes! That is truly frightening. if I had little children, I'd tell them to turn their heads.

  • El Pinche

    LMAO!!!! Photogenic my ass.

  • El Pinche

    This has Tim & Eric written all over it.

  • Barrelhse

    I just looked more closely at the photo and it seriously looks like something is dripping off the bottom of her chin. Either that or she's tripping.

  • Warpde

    Be afraid.
    Be very afraid!

  • LakeLucilleLoon

    I see that she's an over-plucker.

  • http://www.kenlayisalive.org KenLayIsAlive

    Can't she pay her husband to fix her gaze?

  • flamingpdog

    She certainly lost the environmental vote with that picture. It's pretty obvious that the lights are on but nobody's home.

  • Negropolis

    Tina Brown's a bitch in the best sense of the word. Unfortunately, Tina Brown's a consummate courtisan and a media attention whore, so she's also a bitch in the worst sense of the word.

    As for the photo, it screams "The 40-year-old Not-so Virgin."

  • Troglodeity

    I think that cover photo even beats this Bachmann classic: http://lynnrockets.files.wordpress.com/2011/06/ba

  • mormos

    If you look at each individual eye they are looking at the camera, but somehow taken together she stares everywhere at once. Trying to figure out how that is possible is costing me my sanity. I'm begining to think she may actually be an eldritch horror.

  • ttommyunger

    Thirty fucking kids in the house and a closeted Liberace Sound-alike for a husband and you'd look like this too.

  • http://yakkingmelmoth.blogspot.com/ portermelmoth

    Modern surgery can correct that. You know, 'that'.

  • http://yakkingmelmoth.blogspot.com/ portermelmoth

    Next stop: 'Rolling Stone'.

  • miss_grundy

    She looks like she had her picture taken for an anger management class identification card.

    Instead of calling her the queen of rage, call her a raging c**t.

  • benjo765

    meh least its an honest picture, she looks about as nutso and "special" as any sensible person would gauge her to be.

    its a lot better in this respect than Obama's pretend "I'M A DECISIVE LEADER" shot http://www.reobama.com/images/1_18_09_Newsweek_Ma

    LIES!

  • thebeatgoeson

    I love Snuffles!

  • AJWjr.

    A dog ahead of his time…