Congress is still in session for about 60 seconds a day just to do things like pass a resolution extending the funding for the FAA and block recess appointments, both of which are politically important/ newsworthy but neither of which hold much political comedy. But it has been a whole 3 or 4 days without dick jokes about some crusty Democratic politician’s wang, so here is your Newspaper of Record, the New York Times, to rescue the Friday afternoon masses:
[NYTimes via Eagle-Eyed Wonkette Immortal "Josh Fruhlinger"]
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Harry Reid's member going home sounds like a Mormon sex act that is too horrible to contemplate.
The staff on that member seems a bit thin, proportionally speaking.
Oh great FSM!
Did I really need the image of Harry's hairy member on a Friday afternoon after a week from Hell?
P.S. They fixed it already. Whoever they are!
~
Detachable Penis?
Every seven years, like the salmon.
It's not the meat, it's the Congressional motion….
Do they call out "all rise" when only Reid's member is present?
Harry Reid's member has a mind of its own? Nothing new there.
Yeah, but it's a dry heat…
So the headline is "Pro Forma Sessions Cockblock Reid" ?
His member is just lonesome for the soothing comfort of those magic panties.
great, now i can't stop thinking about two tangerines in a tube sock
Harry no longer remembers
whenwhere membership had its privileges.What does a veteran Senator smell like? Depends… wow that was tasteless.
Hey, Internet, still think correct punctuation isn't important?
'Eats, shoots and 'members'..(what a memory!) Or, 'Eats shoots and members'. (Gah!! Evil Panda!)
Are Reid's pomegranates ripe yet?
Harry is all member, no balls.
I have suspected for years that Reid is underrated, and now I am certain of it.
I bet his member would like come home.
Listening to my member has caused me nothing but grief. Fun grief, but grief nonetheless.
I'm sure he's hung like a horsefly.
I bet Harry is well-hung, he has a very attractive wife and just seems like one of those men who really enjoys the old love act.
You know who else's member desires to go home?
(besides mine–will this day ever end?)
Maximus Decimus Meridius?
Just telling us what we already know: Congress is just a bunch of dicks.
Are you telling me that Congress' most important duties – naming Post Office Branches and passing ridiculous commemorative resolutions like "Pickle Flavored Ice Cream Day" – are on hold?
Wait, it's possible to block recess appointments? Why wasn't this done to prevent Jon Bolton and other Cowboy Caligula henchmen?
Oh, that's right: No-gonad chickenshit backbones-are-off-the-table Vichy Democrats.
I am shocked, shocked I say, to hear that back room political dealing and obfuscation continues in our Senate.
Yep.
I'm surprised that Harry has a pulse, let alone a member!
If you ever saw Mrs. Reid, you would understand.
And now I can spend all weekend imagining Harry Reid alone in his office punching his junk, yelling "Na na na! I'm not listening to you! Leave me alone!!"
Thank you, Wonkette!
So it's safe to say this issue is coming to a head?
So, you're saying that these appointments are being cock-blocked?
So they found the twig, so what? Call me when they finally find the berries.
OMG.
This should be the last post of the weekend.
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Is that a joke?
Two vanloads of Santorum?
And forty jars of jelly.
Frothy.
That is all.
Blech, going back to Benincasa's material. I decline to spend the weekend dwelling on the desires of Harry's member.
Hey for all the shit Harry gets I think he’s due a little down time with a couple of show girls. Have a nice August Senator Reid and that goes for your member too.
For reals. Poor old dusty bastard has to deal with Turtle McFuckface all the time. Dude needs an eight ball and a Steely Dan vacation, stat.
There was once a charming young woman that referred to a part of her anatomy as my member's home.
OT, but relating to the topic we closed with yesterday. Made me laugh, until I realized my 401 is fucked too.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4hfdaC7eL4
And if someone already posted it, lo siento.
I guess he does hang to the left after all
I don't think you can highlight on a digital image. Weiner tried it, but the yellow just messed up his cellphone camera.
Harry Reid, (D. Flaccid)
He prolly employs his member with the same enthusiasm he does everything else: with all the vigor of a man desperately fighting sleep.
Members need sleep too.
There is such a thing as overdoing it, though; as in my case.
Harry Reid's is the greatest deliberative body in the world.
How's it hanging, Harry?
He has a lot of members. They get together and do stuff sometimes.
let's face no matter how much the GOP talks they always get owned by the democrats.
Delighted to meet you, Parallel Universe Person. Please pass along my regards to President Kerry!
Because when the person in the stall next to you in the Senate bathroom flushes, you're supposed to yell out at the top of your lungs, "HEY! YOU SUNK MY BATTLESHIP!"
Old Senate tradition.
I read that as "You suck my battleship!" lol
Well, I certainly know what it's like to have a downgrade in the ol' credit rating. I have never felt more truly American than I do today!
Today our FICO scores are all a bit lower, in solidarity.
Harry Reid's member forever longs for and points toward Nevada, home of Mormonia, pomegranate trees, and hookers. Lots and lots of hookers.
Nation's leader in fake boobs per capita.
Somehow, I cannot fit Harry and hooker into the same picture.
Hey when Harry Reid's member and Nancy Pelosi have a meeting, does a Boener ever get involved?
Harry, methinks you're in over your head.
That would leave the Wonketteriate really hanging.
The members of the Wonkette club agree.
Remember kids, nightmares CAN come true!
The responses to this piece are disappointing, one might even say flaccid.
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