UGH  3:53 pm August 5, 2011

Fox Nation Notices There Were Black People At Obama’s Birthday Party

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

we cannot deal with these people on a Friday.Here is your dumb racist Fox Nation headline screengrab accusing Obama of some kind of secret anti-employment Black Panther birthday celebration, because “hip-hop” is the acceptable derogatory term for “black people things” if you are an old white racist who reads Fox Nation. Why didn’t this barbecue party create jobs? Why is Obama always inviting black people to his parties? Why can’t Obama party with some employed people sometimes? Maybe they would accidentally create some jobs while Obama parties?

For the cruelly illiterate white readers of the Fox Nation blog, the headline writers also throw them another clue: the URL handle reads http://nation.foxnews.com/president-obama/2011/08/05/obama-parties-chris-rock-jay-z-and-whoopi-while-rome-burns. Got that? There were black people at a party and there are no jobs in America, which is Rome, and it is burning to the ground. Did Fox News just admit that America is actually terrible? EVERYTHING IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE.

Oh right, black people are not allowed to have money or party unless the white people in the country get their party and money first. It’s like this Negro President of ours STILL cannot remember the rules. [Fox Nation]

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 283 comments }

donner_froh August 5, 2011 at 3:55 pm

The Black people are burning Rome to the ground because they are always firebombing Whitey.

arihaya August 5, 2011 at 4:32 pm

also the blacks were crucifying Jaysus, because they hate white people … and white culture,

look for it in the Bible

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 4:42 pm

"Nero" is, after all, just one letter short of "Negro".

WunkRocker August 5, 2011 at 9:39 pm

4 black people in a crowd = riot

Winnie_Cooper August 5, 2011 at 10:41 pm

Except of course when Whitey is firebombing the Black people. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MOVE#1985_bombing

PristinePantalones August 5, 2011 at 11:58 pm

Well, yeah, but that doesn't count. You know, anaconda white people are, like, normal, and the standard, and all that stuff.

Barb August 5, 2011 at 3:56 pm

I guess they forgot the picture of Bush, handing McCain the birthday cake on the White House front lawn while Katrina was blowing through New Orleans.

ManchuCandidate August 5, 2011 at 3:57 pm

Or this one… http://www.bodhipaksa.com/images/mccain-bush.jpg

"You smell so good, George. I wish I could quit you…"

Barb August 5, 2011 at 3:59 pm

Correction, Bush handed him the cake on a tarmac, not the lawn, sorry.
Love that picture, Manchu, thanks!

prommie August 5, 2011 at 4:22 pm

He played some guitar, too, during Katrina.

Inchhigh August 5, 2011 at 4:26 pm

Blowin' In The Wind ?

Boredw/Gravitas August 5, 2011 at 4:29 pm

They all can blow me….

Sue4466 August 5, 2011 at 4:34 pm

Who'll Stop the Rain

prommie August 5, 2011 at 4:43 pm
Lionel[redacted]Esq August 5, 2011 at 4:57 pm

Fortunate Son?

SayItWithWookies August 5, 2011 at 4:55 pm

"While My Guitar Gently Drowns in Its Attic"

Barb August 5, 2011 at 9:44 pm

InchHigh, you are very funny. I like you.

Sue4466 August 5, 2011 at 4:35 pm

Huge diff there Barb. Bush and McCain are white. S'okay.

ManchuCandidate August 5, 2011 at 3:56 pm

All it needs is a "Where the White Women At"? caption.

Barb August 5, 2011 at 4:04 pm

Mind if we dance whif your dates? (typo intended)

smokefilleddoommate August 5, 2011 at 4:35 pm

birfday, muthafuckas!

ifthethunderdontgetya August 5, 2011 at 4:05 pm

The Sheriff President is a Ni-CLANG!
~

a_pink_poodle August 5, 2011 at 4:40 pm

- What'd he say?
- He said the President is near!

TheSheriffsNear August 5, 2011 at 11:41 pm

That's what I'm talkin' about!

Rehrer!

FakaktaSouth August 5, 2011 at 4:38 pm

S'cuse me while I whip this out…
Oops sorry I just fainted from the thought.

Limeylizzie August 5, 2011 at 6:33 pm

I bravely volunteer to be one of the white women, of which you speak, where do I go?

snicker snack August 5, 2011 at 10:56 pm

I will follow you, Ms. Limeylizzie, into the pit of hiphopdom to dance with the Negroes.

pukebot August 5, 2011 at 3:56 pm

what, not enough war criminals like back in the bush days?

Arken August 5, 2011 at 3:57 pm

Funny, I thought it was the Republicans who were going to bring us jobs.

widestanceroman August 5, 2011 at 4:37 pm

JOBS being the acronym for 'Jerk-Off Bull Shit," and that they have been dolling out like so many tobacco lobbyist checks.

memzilla August 5, 2011 at 3:57 pm

What about the money that Faux News spends to have caviar and pickled librul hearts in the Green Room?

LodovikoZ August 5, 2011 at 5:52 pm

Pickled Librul? I think not. Raw.

donner_froh August 5, 2011 at 3:58 pm

Fox News is losing its edge. There are no references to watermelon or tar babies–not even any slavery jokes.

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 4:43 pm

Those will arrive in the form of forwarded racist emails from Republican politicians all over the country, come Monday morning.

GOPCrusher August 5, 2011 at 5:45 pm

Don't think it will take that long. The forum discussion on Faux Noise Sunday should be interesting. Juan Williams can feign outrage.

mavenmaven August 5, 2011 at 3:58 pm

"Also present: Chicago pals, law-school friends, donors" – of course, you can assume, William Ayers.

memzilla August 5, 2011 at 4:00 pm

And Al Capone's ghost.

EatsBabyDingos August 5, 2011 at 3:59 pm

OK Go is hip hop? I thought they were rap.

Gratuitous World August 5, 2011 at 4:07 pm

"Let the Eagle Soar" or GTFO

finallyhappy August 6, 2011 at 8:20 am

Stevie Wonder, too?

rte148 August 8, 2011 at 3:34 am

remember: while all rap is Hip Hop, not all Hip Hop is rap

horsedreamer_1 August 8, 2011 at 10:14 am

I thought OK GO was Cheap Trick as filtered thru Fuelled by Ramen Records.

Come here a minute August 5, 2011 at 3:59 pm

Weird that they didn't lead with the (super white) band OK Go who also performed.

Doktor Zoom August 5, 2011 at 9:02 pm

To be strictly accurate, OK Go was at the Wednesday night party in Chicago, not at the White House on Thursday. On the other hand, the Fox story barely mentioned the presence of Relentlessly White Person Tom Hanks….

horsedreamer_1 August 8, 2011 at 10:19 am

Who recently released his second directorial effort, Larry Crown, which features known blacks Cedric the Entertainer & Taraji* P. Henson, & woman of easy virtue Julia Roberts.

*What kind of name is this!?

Also, multiple anchor-babies (Wilmer Valderrama, Roxana Ortega, et. al.), avowed homosexual George Takei, & drug-lord Bryan Cranston.

BlueStateLibel August 5, 2011 at 3:59 pm

And not a single orange American among them! Boehner weeps bitter tears.

DaRooster August 5, 2011 at 4:20 pm

Talk about yer "coloreds".

Biel_ze_Bubba August 6, 2011 at 6:10 pm

Ever wonder what South Africa would have done with Boner, back in the day? The guy's not even ON their color chart.

"Hey, Gunther, do we have a "brightly colored" category?"

PalinPussyPower August 5, 2011 at 3:59 pm

Black people! I will now fall backwards with my legs open.

prommie August 5, 2011 at 4:23 pm

I am heading to the store to get some heavy duty instant tanning spray, I hope my plan will work. . . .

PalinPussyPower August 5, 2011 at 5:35 pm

It is how Boehner managed to get into my shorts.

FakaktaSouth August 5, 2011 at 4:40 pm

Go girl and then tell me all about it.
I just told my friend yesterday that since I'm all til death to you parted I am glad I never went Alabama Blacksnake – I'd probably just cry myself to sleep every night.

PalinPussyPower August 5, 2011 at 5:37 pm

Eh. Since the gheys have been permitted to get married, marriage as an institution is no longer sacred. Therefore, also too, you may now whore around with the negros. And such.

FakaktaSouth August 5, 2011 at 6:37 pm

OH MY GOD YOU ARE MY NEW SPIRITUAL ADVISER!!!!

Dashboard_Jesus August 6, 2011 at 2:54 am

funny, I just read your profile description for 1st time Ms. Fakakta, seems like you are due for a new spiritual 'advisor', but no churchin' for all y'all! (I lived in Alabama for a year in another lifetime and that's all I can remember of that furrin' language?) also, too

BTWBFDIMHO August 5, 2011 at 8:30 pm

Win!

DrunkIrishman August 5, 2011 at 4:00 pm

Wait, Obama's BLACK?!?

MozakiBlocks August 5, 2011 at 4:04 pm

And apparently he was so even before his election in Nov '08. I guess I really need to start paying attention to the news.

Ducksworthy August 5, 2011 at 4:48 pm

At least he's not some Black Librul.

Lionel[redacted]Esq August 5, 2011 at 5:05 pm

I'm confused. I thought he was a Chinese Muslim or something like that.

Biel_ze_Bubba August 6, 2011 at 6:11 pm

That's the other half.

GOPCrusher August 5, 2011 at 5:47 pm

RACIST! Why do libruls never say he's half-white? DEMOCRATIC PLANTATION!

finallyhappy August 6, 2011 at 8:22 am

Because in Amurica-one drop of black blood makes you black. The GOp is going to start a genetics program on this(of course, there is no way to tell via genetics but science is just librul crap anyway)

PristinePantalones August 6, 2011 at 2:23 pm

Also, they'll shut down the program tout-suite after they discover how many of them have more than just that one drop, if you catch my drift. And I b'leev you do.

crybabyboehner August 5, 2011 at 4:00 pm

The relevant question is, did they have white people bussing the tables?

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:07 pm

one can dream.

BerkeleyBear August 7, 2011 at 11:00 pm

Yeah, but as Anthony Bourdain pointed out on Real Tim with Bill Maher this week, white people don't even THINK about taking those gigs, or dishwashing, or picking crops. We've all come to believe such things are beneath us somehow.

Mumbletypeg August 5, 2011 at 4:00 pm

Yonder Foxphiles, let me call your attention to white people in the country get their party and money first.
Enjoy the flashback whilst gargling a FEMA-toxified trailer-full of salted dildoes. You're welcome.

orygoon August 5, 2011 at 4:01 pm

Also, watermelon?

4tehlulz_lite August 5, 2011 at 4:02 pm

Needs more racism.

Boredw/Gravitas August 5, 2011 at 4:33 pm

Nah, there's plenty there.

Nostrildamus August 5, 2011 at 4:43 pm

I suppose they could photoshop in a gun or two.

OhNoGuy August 5, 2011 at 10:22 pm

Let's make Rupert an honorary citizen of the Confederate States of America,

And revoke his US citizenship.

Biel_ze_Bubba August 6, 2011 at 11:56 am

"Fox Nation", "Aryan Nation".

Any similarity between the two are pure coincidence, right?

Gratuitous World August 5, 2011 at 4:03 pm

"thrown by ACORN, catered by Planned Parenthood and paid for by you, the taxpayer! for shame."

i miss the days when teh blacks could only celebrate 3/5 as hard the rest of us (me +my frat brothers).

Boredw/Gravitas August 5, 2011 at 4:33 pm

"catered by Planned Parenthood?" What, fetuses in aspic?

PristinePantalones August 6, 2011 at 2:26 pm

There are many fine recipes for fetus available in Kwangtung. Also a Fruit Chan movie.

bagofmice August 6, 2011 at 3:00 pm

Santorum.

techmom August 6, 2011 at 9:01 pm

So it did create jobs for the Planned Parenthood catering branch

DaSandman August 5, 2011 at 4:03 pm

Gawdam, Mr Ailes, them niggers jest won't go on back to pickin' cotton once they get all up in their own private jets, music, comedy and sports careers and livin' in that White Hawse and shit.

We jest gotta pass us a law that says that 4 niggers together constitues a defacto ass riot.

NorthStarSpanx August 5, 2011 at 8:31 pm

Remember too to always go after more than three women in a living arrangement; automatic brothels, threat to society. Whores and abortions.

Steverino247 August 5, 2011 at 4:03 pm

Fox News is still pissed that "President" is now available in black, that's all.

johnnyzhivago August 5, 2011 at 4:03 pm

Doesn't FOX realize nobody gives a shit about some stupid old European city burning to the ground?

ifthethunderdontgetya August 5, 2011 at 4:03 pm

FIRE!
~

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:18 pm

fucking awesome!

Chet Kincaid August 5, 2011 at 4:47 pm

FAH…YURH!! FAH…YURH!!
That takes me back to Junior High School.

LesBontemps August 5, 2011 at 4:50 pm

It's Funky Friday after all. Thanks for that.

OkieDokieDog August 5, 2011 at 4:04 pm

Hey! If these were the black guys that were out beating up the black lesbians in DC they'd be heroes to the FOX whitey Nation.
http://www.washingtonblade.com/2011/08/05/5-lesbi

horsedreamer_1 August 8, 2011 at 10:54 am

This is Bad News for M'Shell Ndegecello!

forgracie August 5, 2011 at 4:04 pm

Is that a line up? I can't identify him officer, they all look the same to me….

SexySmurf August 5, 2011 at 4:04 pm

And they were all screaming, "I want mo' motherfuckin' iced tea."

OC_Surf_Serf August 5, 2011 at 4:05 pm

FOX Nation is so fucking pale-n-white that even Boehner looks black…

JoshuaNorton August 5, 2011 at 4:05 pm

They can have all the goddamn birthdays they want. Just stop dragging me along with you.

bureaucrap August 5, 2011 at 4:05 pm

If a Democrat is caught having a good time before he/she has given the Koch brothers all the additional tax breaks they need to create jobs, that means they JUST DON'T CARE ABOUT AMERIKKKA.

LettucePrey August 5, 2011 at 4:05 pm

At the very least, I hope the Negroes picked up after themselves.

chascates August 5, 2011 at 4:06 pm

What about all the crack dealers, people selling forty-ouncers, sport shoes, and gold jewelery?

weejee August 5, 2011 at 4:17 pm

Howz the chicken ranch workin' out?

chascates August 5, 2011 at 10:42 pm

Drought, high heat, uncooperative chickens! Farmer sold over 600 chickens in 2 weeks; down to less than a dozen. My house has only one window A/C unit and one of my cats got out and is probably a goner.

Still, I'm farther away from Rick Perry now I'm out of Austin so it's all good!

And this part of Texas is Tea Party Central!!!!!!!!!

GOPCrusher August 5, 2011 at 5:51 pm

Did they go down to the corner and pour out a 40 for Tupac?

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:06 pm
johnnyzhivago August 5, 2011 at 4:06 pm

It's actually toned down from the FIRST URL:
nation.foxnews.com/president-obama/2011/08/05/obama-jams-with-gangsta-rappers-makes-fun-of-raping-white-women-while-eating-watermelons-and-fried-chicken

nappyduggs August 5, 2011 at 4:06 pm

With the exception of Honest Abe, that "Ebony Top 100" Mount Rushmore up there is so much cooler than the Whitey version.

littlebigdaddy August 5, 2011 at 4:08 pm

What, is there a new Wayans brothers movie coming out?

GOPCrusher August 5, 2011 at 5:52 pm

Black Dynamite II

Negropolis August 6, 2011 at 1:22 am

God, I hope not.

mayor_quimby August 6, 2011 at 1:30 am

There will ALWAYS be a new Wayans movie or tv show coming out. They even snuck a Wayans onto that one ABC comedy, my chick didn't know why she hated the show until I told her the black dude was a Wayans – then she said "that's it! I knew something was wrong, I didn't know they snuck a Wayans in on me!"

metamarcisf August 5, 2011 at 4:08 pm

Any menu that includes the four food groups: watermelons, kool-aid, fried chicken and hog jowls deserves nothing but praise.

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 4:09 pm

But remember how indignant Fox News was every time that Bush went golfing while the men and women of the armed forces were being blown to pieces in a war that Bush started under false pretenses?

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:22 pm

that was around the time Fox News was very critical of Defense Dept. spending, too.

Fukui_sanYesOta August 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm

Yes, I remember that. It was when they were complaining that unfunded wars were driving the national debt to unsustainable levels and that the deficit was going to kill everyone's children.

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:31 pm

good times. they did an excellent job with Black History Month back in 2003. brought tears to my eyes hearing Coulter on O'Reilly talking about how important it is to not judge people by the color of their skin.

Fukui_sanYesOta August 5, 2011 at 4:36 pm

What really touched me was the duet of Ebony and Ivory with Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dogg and Sean Hannity.

PalinPussyPower August 5, 2011 at 5:40 pm

I remember those days. That was around the time they aired the Pulitzer Prize-winning piece about NOTHINGWHATSOFUCKINGEVER. Good times.

cerebralposse August 5, 2011 at 7:03 pm

It's ALL false pretense! Bush is a globalist too. They ALL have the exact same agenda, Destroy the US! Bankrupt the US! Start unending wars all over the globe and kill 80% of us! And NO, if you are reading this, you are NOT part of the 20%!

Hacklebarney August 5, 2011 at 4:09 pm

Bullshit! Jay-Z alone has probably fired more people than Fox Nation has ever employed; Roca-A-Fella forever!!!

Seriously though, old white people are still scared of the browns and despite all the trouble this is causing Barry, I can't help but get a little satisfaction in picturing them shuddering fearfully in their Hoverounds.

SexySmurf August 5, 2011 at 4:10 pm

"Obama takes brown shit; fails to create jobs."

SorosBot August 5, 2011 at 4:10 pm

It is a shock to see Fox being openly racist; usually they at least try to hide it with dog-whistles.

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 4:18 pm

SOME PEOPLE SAY that Barack Obama's birthday party was a hip-hop extravaganza that was a bit "over the top" for these troubled times! What do YOU think*?

A. Yes, N*ggerbash 2011 is terrible.
B. Black Preznit.
C. All of the both aboveness.

*This is a trick question – Fox News viewers DON'T think.

johnnyzhivago August 5, 2011 at 4:11 pm

Al Capone, Joanne Chesamard and Idi Amin were also invited, but had prior commitments.

emmelemm August 5, 2011 at 4:11 pm

I think the tagline "UGH" pretty much says it all.

MiniMencken August 5, 2011 at 4:13 pm

Fox News just showing off their mad skilz at dog-whistle racism.

petehammer August 5, 2011 at 5:01 pm

I'm not even sure this qualifies as "dog-whistle." More just straight up racism.

PuckStopsHere August 5, 2011 at 4:13 pm

Barack Obama don't care about white people.

Jukesgrrl August 5, 2011 at 4:14 pm

Wait til Barry starts giving all the brothers the Presidential Medal of Freedom. You know … the one George Bush gave his brother George Tenet. Of course FOX will object. After all, how much brush did they cut down fer Amurrica???

Radiotherapy® August 5, 2011 at 4:14 pm

Celebrating his 50th birthday. Oh my god, The Gaul.

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm

French? i thought he was Kenyan.

PristinePantalones August 6, 2011 at 5:14 pm

It's those Irish shoemakers in the ancestral line. Also, all teh vowels. How was anyone supposed to know they were Gaels and not Gauls?

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 4:16 pm

Man, when I think "hip hop", I think "Herbie Hancock." He so thug.

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:34 pm

i don't know. i always thought this was pretty bad ass: http://youtu.be/XSxMtDnRS24

Chet Kincaid August 5, 2011 at 5:10 pm

That is so keytarded. Miles was so upset by that song, he covered a Cyndi Lauper tune.

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 5:21 pm

Miles was just mad Herbie didn't use a wah pedal on the keytar.

MissTaken August 5, 2011 at 4:16 pm

Because Bush's Country-Western Ho Down Created Eleventy Millions of Jobs

DashboardBuddha August 5, 2011 at 4:18 pm

And the Onion thought it was a joke:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/obama-turns-50-d

The Onion is going to have an increasingly difficult time staying ahead of the stupid curve.

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 4:21 pm

Well, frankly, it would have run more true if Obama had agreed to stay 49 for the next four years or something, after vowing to turn 50 no matter what.

SorosBot August 5, 2011 at 4:30 pm

Quite a few of their articles have come true in recent years, it's somewhat scary. Probably their most prophetic article was this one:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/bush-our-long-na

Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over'
January 17, 2001 | ISSUE 43•01 ISSUE 37•01

WASHINGTON, DC–Mere days from assuming the presidency and closing the door on eight years of Bill Clinton, president-elect George W. Bush assured the nation in a televised address Tuesday that "our long national nightmare of peace and prosperity is finally over."

"My fellow Americans," Bush said, "at long last, we have reached the end of the dark period in American history that will come to be known as the Clinton Era, eight long years characterized by unprecedented economic expansion, a sharp decrease in crime, and sustained peace overseas. The time has come to put all of that behind us."

..

During the 40-minute speech, Bush also promised to bring an end to the severe war drought that plagued the nation under Clinton, assuring citizens that the U.S. will engage in at least one Gulf War-level armed conflict in the next four years.

"You better believe we're going to mix it up with somebody at some point during my administration," said Bush, who plans a 250 percent boost in military spending. "Unlike my predecessor, I am fully committed to putting soldiers in battle situations. Otherwise, what is the point of even having a military?"

Sue4466 August 5, 2011 at 4:38 pm

Scarily prescient, that Onion.

BaldarTFlagass August 5, 2011 at 6:05 pm

It's like they own a time machine or something.

Neoyorquino August 5, 2011 at 4:18 pm

Needs more "Yeaah Boyeeee!"

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 4:20 pm

You know who ELSE was in an Empire State of Mind?

MissTaken August 5, 2011 at 4:22 pm

Napolean?

CrunchyKnee August 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm

Darth Vadar?

DaRooster August 5, 2011 at 4:31 pm

King Kong?

smokefilleddoommate August 5, 2011 at 4:32 pm

Nucky Thompson?

Walkinwiddaking August 5, 2011 at 5:07 pm

Nero? Figured I cover the "while Rome burns angle."

Lionel[redacted]Esq August 5, 2011 at 5:08 pm

Victoria?

Lionel[redacted]Esq August 5, 2011 at 5:23 pm

Joshua Norton?

Jerry Fjord August 5, 2011 at 5:41 pm

My mom?

GOPCrusher August 5, 2011 at 5:57 pm

Ace Frehley?

BaldarTFlagass August 5, 2011 at 6:06 pm

Al Smith?

Negropolis August 6, 2011 at 1:31 am

Charlemagne?

An_Outhouse August 6, 2011 at 11:47 am

Paul Kantner?

horsedreamer_1 August 8, 2011 at 10:22 am

Atari Teenage Riot?

powersuit August 5, 2011 at 4:20 pm

Really, Fox should stop pretending and just put up a bunch of Willie Horton pix next to Obama. I think Roger Ailes knows all about Willie Horton.

GuanoFaucet August 5, 2011 at 4:21 pm

Fox Nation has a good relationship with the blacks

CrunchyKnee August 5, 2011 at 4:21 pm

All things said that is a pretty shitty basketball team, even with the round mound of rebound.

MissTaken August 5, 2011 at 4:21 pm

"The president loves pie, so last night he had a choice of apple, cherry, huckleberry and/or peach"

I bet pie wasn't the only thing the Prez ate last night….hubba hubba!

Sorry all, I'm all flustered after Sara's column and my mind is stuck in the gutter.

mayor_quimby August 6, 2011 at 1:39 am

You're not the only one, I have daydreams of Michelle's thighs of steel wrapped around my.. nevermind, but trust me it's filthy.

edgydrifter August 5, 2011 at 4:22 pm

Meanwhile, Fox is reporting that Boehner (Orange Be His Name), Cantor and the rest of the congressional Republicans are spending the entire month of August with their noses to the grindstone just cold pumping out jobs as fast as they can. Thank goodness the Republicans can be counted on to always put country first.

SorosBot August 5, 2011 at 4:25 pm

They're creating jobs the best way possible: by laying off government employees.

poorgradstudent August 5, 2011 at 6:39 pm

To be fair, doing their best to make sure people starve is one way of approaching a bad economy.

littlebigdaddy August 5, 2011 at 6:51 pm

I was not aware that there was an unemployment problem among young male prostitutes and/or golf caddies

MissTaken August 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm

Jay-Z looks a little scared in that picture. I guess Fox Nation aren't the only ones intimidated by a group of black men.

FakaktaSouth August 5, 2011 at 4:25 pm

I love Charles Barkley. I once had a 2 hour conversation with our local (he's also national) sports radio dude Paul Finebaum (Fien-uh-baum as The Maddow called him) on his stupid show about how I would vote for Charles for Governor of Alabama (he says he's running all the time, but alas, no) because he came out and said Christian Conservatives were stupid and that he would legalize gay marriage in a second. Two. Hours. I shit you not. It takes that long to explain to my fellow statesmen that they are all fucking retards, and yes a white girl from Bama would do this.

SorosBot August 5, 2011 at 4:57 pm

I remember when he said, "I used to be a Republican, but then the Republican Party went crazy"; that was good.

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:13 pm

I used to be a Republican, back when I was busy shitting in my diapers.

Then I grew up and the Republican party didn't….

FakaktaSouth August 5, 2011 at 5:26 pm

I remember when he would say, "yeah I'm a Republican, I'm rich" and we would laugh and it just meant he was funny and not that he was a scary, fundamentalist, fact denying, environment destroying, lying, sick child fucking, poor people hating, ignorant dickbag.

DaRooster August 5, 2011 at 4:25 pm

See what happens when the Senate goes on vacation?
Crazy ass shit that's what… I am sure they will NEVER take another break again due to this.

Jerry Fjord August 5, 2011 at 5:44 pm

I say, if one doesn't watch them those negroes will walk off with the cutlery!

smoke-filled empuje August 5, 2011 at 4:26 pm

So Charles Barkley is the new Whoopi?

MissTaken August 5, 2011 at 4:27 pm

or Barack Obama

smokefilleddoommate August 6, 2011 at 2:49 am

Then that means Sir Charles is prez!

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:11 pm

"Charles Barkley"

Who let the dogs out? Woof, woof!
–Mitt Romney

not that Dewey August 6, 2011 at 11:05 am

'cause anything less would be uncivilized.

Tommmcatt August 5, 2011 at 4:26 pm

Big birthday bash with Obama, Charles Barkley, Chris Rock and Jay Z

-OR-

Big birthday bash with Mike Huckabee, Steve Doocy, Rich Little and Ted Neugent

Which sounds like more fun?

Fuck you, Fox News assholes. Just face it, Liberals are better than you.

Fukui_sanYesOta August 5, 2011 at 4:32 pm

Big birthday bash with Mike Huckabee, Steve Doocy, Rich Little and Ted Neugent

With a special musical number performed by Thad McCotter and the Second Amendments followed by a standup comedy routine by Tim Pawlenzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Jerry Fjord August 5, 2011 at 5:47 pm

With the latter choice I'd bet money on a sexual assault occurring and I DAMN well wouldn't feel comfortable if there were any kids around them.

prommie August 5, 2011 at 4:27 pm

Uppity Halfrican.

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:09 pm

Well, he's half white, so there was a plate sitting in the corner with a pile of Wonderbread cucumber sandwiches with mayonaise, with the crusts cut off.

Uneaten…

bumfug August 5, 2011 at 4:27 pm

This brings back memories of their coverage of the Bush birthdays: "Whitebread Bland-fest Celebrates Mediocrity And The Loss Of All Hope".

metamarcisf August 5, 2011 at 4:30 pm

Oh! Did I break your concentration?

prommie August 5, 2011 at 4:46 pm

tasty hamburger, though

DaRooster August 5, 2011 at 4:30 pm

OT. Hey Barry!
Please start referring to the mess we are in as The Bush Recession. I think we really need to start calling a spad… shit… you know what I mean.

Thank you!

Fox n Fiends August 5, 2011 at 4:31 pm

Obama needs to throw a huge blacks-only party with dozens of old white men serving the guests food & drinks, washroom attending and shining shoes. THAT would be the End Times for Teatards.

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:07 pm

And all the guests rub their heads for good luck, just like Bush every time he got a chance with black kids around…..

petehammer August 5, 2011 at 5:07 pm

Oh God Yes.

GOPCrusher August 5, 2011 at 6:00 pm

BOY! Go down to the wine cellar and bring up another bottle of Thunderbird!

neiltheblaze August 5, 2011 at 4:33 pm

Yes, how can the President of the United States have a birfday party while Rome burns?

Though why the President of the United States should be particularly involved when a city in Italy is burning makes little sense to me – but whatevs.

DaRooster August 5, 2011 at 4:33 pm

They are just pissed 'cuz they are stuck with Herman… "Obama gets all the cool ones to hang out with."

CrunchyKnee August 5, 2011 at 4:39 pm

Cain had a black friend…once.

Fukui_sanYesOta August 5, 2011 at 4:42 pm

Cain had a black friend…once.

More accurate?

petehammer August 5, 2011 at 5:10 pm

Anyone remember the Bob Dole "Black Republicans" thing from Conan where O.J. came on the screen? Hilarious.

natoslug August 5, 2011 at 4:34 pm

I guess I can get behind job-creating barbeques, but I thought it was tax cuts and deregulation that created jobs. BBQ just creates that sleepy feeling of too much beer and charred flesh, and fond memories of makeout sessions with sister-momma-cousin. It was Southern BBQ, right?

smitallica August 5, 2011 at 4:35 pm

And no one was shot? There goes that stereotype.

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:05 pm

No, you're thinking of drunk, white guys at Applebee's shooting themselves….

metamarcisf August 5, 2011 at 4:36 pm

Why isn't President Obama being blamed for falling gasoline prices?

horsedreamer_1 August 8, 2011 at 10:27 am

I just filled up on Saturday for 3.59 — after getting a quarter-tank at 3.75 two days earlier — & saw it at 3.55 this morning.

As somebody wiser than I about politics (goes by the handle Yail Bloor) said, around the time bin Laden was taken out — but a few days before, actually — by Labor Day, gas will be at 2.90, by the election unemployment will be below 9%, & Obama will win re-elect with 300+ electoral votes.

Chet Kincaid August 5, 2011 at 4:41 pm

Oh my God, I could not even suppress the loudly incredulous laugh upon seeing the headline and graphic. Sorry, officemates.

Ducksworthy August 5, 2011 at 4:43 pm

I wants to know if they was fried chicken.

Jukesgrrl August 5, 2011 at 4:44 pm

FOX's next headline:

Mumia Abu-Jamal Let Out of Jail for Obama's Birthday?

prommie August 5, 2011 at 4:47 pm

You mean he wasn't?

fuflans August 5, 2011 at 4:44 pm

bamz probably thought rick perry was taking care of the whole jobs thing with the praying party.

BarackMyWorld August 5, 2011 at 4:47 pm

You know, as much as I despised Jack Kemp's economic ideas, I had enough respect for him to think if he were still alive he'd be denouncing this shit.

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 4:47 pm

Wait, is Rome actually on fire? I knew Italy was having some issues, but if Rome is literally burning, should be do something about it? What if Berlusconi is in danger, sheeple?!

SorosBot August 5, 2011 at 4:53 pm

Will someone please think of the child prostitutes?

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:04 pm

"Wait, is Rome actually on fire?"

Texas is the new Rome and Rick Perry is Nero.

"Will someone please think of the child prostitutes?"

Well, over on Harry Hines in Dallas, they got prostitutes, but it's obviously been a long, long time since they were children…

//rimshot

Lionel[redacted]Esq August 5, 2011 at 5:12 pm

I'm just proud to be the first person to fist you after that line. Although the office must wonder why I suddenly broke up laughing.

north_of_moscow August 5, 2011 at 4:48 pm

Has anyone made a Charles Barkley-blowjob joke yet? If not, I am making one.

SudsMcKenzie August 5, 2011 at 6:30 pm
Chillwaver August 5, 2011 at 4:50 pm

Did Dubya's Country BomBQ create any jobs? Didn't think so.

Jukesgrrl August 6, 2011 at 6:06 am

Sold a lot of caskets.

Nostrildamus August 5, 2011 at 4:52 pm

Alas the comments section is closed. Who could possibly guess how Fox Nation readers would comment on this story?

GregComlish August 5, 2011 at 4:58 pm

The guy who owns that rusty camper is going to be pissed when he sees Fox stole his scoop:

OBAMA HAS BOOSE PARTY'S EVERY OTHER DAY (AVERAGE), GIVEING EVERY-ONE $150 STEAKS (IMPORTED) TO EAT. TEN MILLION DOLLORS OF YOUR TAX MONEY SPENT ON BOOSE AND STEAKS.

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:01 pm

Well, I heard Obama's been having MOOSE parties with $150 SNAKES.

Pass it on…

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 5:20 pm

Oh, I love this game! Until a Republican joins in, and then it becomes a "noose" party real quicklike.

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:27 pm

I wish Obama had a NOOSE party and had one of the OLD WHITE MEN hired help hang up a noose and laugh and laugh and say the "Next Republican that fucks with me gets it"...

That would be hi-lar-i-ous…

emmelemm August 5, 2011 at 7:14 pm

That camper was comedy gold.

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 4:58 pm

"Obama's Hip Hop BBQ Didn't Create Jobs"

Sure it did.

Think about how many guys with one pants leg rolled up came home with money stuffed in their pockets.

Everyone knows the secret ingredient in Hip Hop BBQ Sauce is crack….

owhatever August 5, 2011 at 4:58 pm

White folks like Tom Hanks and Hillary Clinton also were at the party, but had to come in through the basement door.

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:17 pm

You sure it wasn't the back door?

HelmutNewton August 5, 2011 at 5:00 pm

You know who else invited black people to their birthday party?

DahBoner August 5, 2011 at 5:16 pm

Sidney Poitier?

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 5:18 pm

Winnie Mandela?

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 5:19 pm

I'd say "Sammy Davis Jr.", but as I understand it, that probably wasn't the case.

Jerry Fjord August 5, 2011 at 5:51 pm

Otis Hitler?

SexySmurf August 5, 2011 at 6:34 pm

Maniac Magee?

imissopus August 5, 2011 at 8:07 pm

Shaft?

horsedreamer_1 August 8, 2011 at 10:28 am

Richard Nixon?

__kth__ August 5, 2011 at 5:02 pm

Fox Nation is to Fox News as the unrated DVD version of your favorite chainsaw-massacre slash-porn quasi-snuff flick is to the one that played at the mall cinema.

Tundra Grifter August 5, 2011 at 5:02 pm

ClusterFox Nation forgot to report that Bull O'Really was just so impressed how polite and well-dressed all the guests were.

emmelemm August 5, 2011 at 7:16 pm

Clean, and articulate.

SayItWithWookies August 5, 2011 at 5:10 pm

I like how it's beneath the dignity of the office for a white Republican president to have a scaled-down bash/dinner/ceremony of any sort, but anything President Obama puts on is either too gangsta or too Nation of Islam, depending on how many of the attendees wear ties. Next time though, Barry should invite Clarence Thomas and welcome him as the "token Republican" and watch some craniums explode.

Lionel[redacted]Esq August 5, 2011 at 5:14 pm

As usual, Wonkette is way to judgmental. After all, FOX Nation did not go with their first headline:

"Lazy Niggers Party While Their White Masters Work"

Biel_ze_Bubba August 6, 2011 at 6:36 pm

Only because the white masters are largely unemployed.

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 5:17 pm

Fox News just closed the comments, because so many angry people were discussing how racist it was.

Doktor Zoom August 5, 2011 at 9:08 pm

Oh? I saw the comments were closed, and assumed that they did it pre-emptively, knowing that Fox viewers' comments would be even more over the top than the headline.

anniegetyerfun August 6, 2011 at 12:06 am

Naw, liberals were going NUTS criticizing the article, with dozens of comments per minute, so they shut it down. I should have taken screen shots.

Lionel[redacted]Esq August 5, 2011 at 5:18 pm

This is obviously an error over at FOX, as Juan Williams has explained that they are very diverse and accepting of Negros.

Tommmcatt August 5, 2011 at 5:38 pm

And the Orientals. Don't forget about how much they love the Orientals.

Jukesgrrl August 6, 2011 at 6:13 am

FOX loves women, too. Especially if they're Republican governors or college girls in a wet T-shirt contest.

Chet Kincaid August 5, 2011 at 5:19 pm

Steve Harvey presented Barry with a Coat of Many Buttons.

Gainsbourg69 August 5, 2011 at 5:24 pm

If they really wanted to scare white people they should've added a picture of Will Smith or Tiger Woods.

HobbesEvilTwin August 5, 2011 at 5:31 pm

We distort, teabaggers abide.

JoshuaNorton August 5, 2011 at 5:34 pm

Well, to be perfectly fair, Repug policy creates lots of jobs. For people in China.

Needz moar 'free trade'.

Goonemeritus August 5, 2011 at 5:47 pm

I guess Fox Nation is surprised by any event that has more than one person of color. In their experience it’s usually only one black guy at their events and he is hanging from a tree.

Jerry Fjord August 5, 2011 at 5:55 pm

A whistle only 'Baggers can hear.

LodovikoZ August 5, 2011 at 5:57 pm

Fox News must use "GOP Mad Libs" to produce product. Just fill in any Obama noun, verb, adjective, or adverb in the blanks, and the piece, she is written!

Pat_Pending August 5, 2011 at 6:03 pm

Wait, are we sure this is a birthday party? Sounds more like the line-up for the Wasserman bar mitzvah. Daddy shells out serious dough for the entertainments…

finallyhappy August 6, 2011 at 8:29 am

my kids knew the kids who had Insync(when Insync was big) and then Dave Matthews at their bat mitzvahs. I think by the third kid's event, Dad was in jail

Radiotherapy® August 5, 2011 at 6:03 pm

I guess these racists just want to party like it's 1799.

imissopus August 5, 2011 at 6:16 pm

And then to cap off the festivities, Obama set his real Kenyan birth certificate on fire while everyone cheered and toasted with glasses filled with aborted fetuses.

poorgradstudent August 5, 2011 at 6:48 pm

I wish I could convince Obama to hold a Dolemite-theme party, especially if it involves Obama calling Eric Cantor an "rat-soup-eatin', insecure, honky motherfucker!"

arihaya August 5, 2011 at 6:59 pm

as Obama turns 50, it is worth to remember that 50 years ago when Barry was born, interracial relationship was illegal and punishable by prison in fucking Virginia and other Southern States

finallyhappy August 6, 2011 at 8:32 am

In 1967(Loving Vs Virginia), the supreme Court finally said that interracial marriage was legal but it was 2000 before Alabama actually removed the law banning it from the state legal code. – I just saw a documentary about it.

BTWBFDIMHO August 5, 2011 at 8:33 pm

Guess who provided the weed over the WH?

ttommyunger August 5, 2011 at 8:34 pm

I don't see how those guys could be much fun at a party. I'm surprised he didn't invite Grover Norquist, Newt Gingrinch, Mitch McConnell, John Boehner, Charles Krauthammer, Erik Erickson, Rush Limbaugh….I could go on, but you get the idea.

El Pinche August 5, 2011 at 9:14 pm

Yeah and I guess they didn't want to ruin the whole thing with Herman Cain and the Conservative Cameo Allen West. "Slavery wasn't so bad! …hey where you going ??"

ttommyunger August 5, 2011 at 9:27 pm

Don't forget Clarence “Pubes” Thomas.

smokefilleddoommate August 6, 2011 at 3:18 am

Krauthammer is such a card.. When he puts the lampshade on his head, people always mistake him for a modern performance art piece, although they never really agree on the message: compact fluorescents or disabled people?*

*disclaimer: I did not just make that joke.

Negropolis August 6, 2011 at 3:37 am

#notintendeasanactualjoke is the tag, my friend.

ttommyunger August 6, 2011 at 7:26 am

I prefer the term “cripple” for Charles. It is all-encompassing for him: body, soul, mind.

El Pinche August 5, 2011 at 9:21 pm

My favorite birthday party was the one where Bush and McCain were eating cake while New Orleans was drowning. Pat Boone rocked the mic on dat wun.

soojank August 5, 2011 at 9:33 pm

But aren't these people all very wealthy and therefore they shit (create?) jobs by merely existing?

Or does that only apply to white rich people?

El Pinche August 6, 2011 at 12:02 am

Squat, shit, and pray for a job turd……it's the GOP proposed plan.

anniegetyerfun August 6, 2011 at 12:09 am

Yes.

chascates August 5, 2011 at 11:07 pm

Matt Drudge has an entire section about these frightening 'black' people':

'Mob' beatings at WI state fair…

'Hundreds of young black people beating white people'…

Fairgoers 'pulled out of cars'…

'They were just going after white people'…

Heightened security…

El Pinche August 5, 2011 at 11:34 pm

Three-corner hats shoved up diabetics lard asses by non-white union thugs

Tea Party patriots walk in healthy, leave in hoverounds.

Andrew Breitbart beaten senseless, pees blood for two weeks

….I just made my nipples hard with delight.

horsedreamer_1 August 8, 2011 at 10:32 am

My tenth grade English classmate Dennis [shares his name with a Washington notable, on the Justice side] just told another fried chicken joke after seeing this story about his hometown.

(Backstory: day of the Million Man March, dude was jesting about the event getting catered by KFC, with watermelon for dessert, & the other whities in my class were giggling at it all. I wasn't, though — seriously. & the Mexican kid, Rob, was awkwardly smiling, knowing he might be next to get joked on.)

Negropolis August 6, 2011 at 1:02 am

…and, OMG, they all look exactly alike!

The president's a total Nero.

Negropolis August 6, 2011 at 1:11 am

obama-parties-chris-rock-jay-z-and-whoopi-while-rome-burns

Okay, that was hilarious to me for two reasons. First, "Whoopi While Rome Burns" sounds like a humorous porno. Second, the entire url title reads like an ironic Wonkette title.

bagofmice August 6, 2011 at 3:30 pm

It do. It's like they're becoming the onion of our time. Also, I'm certain there's a Neropolis joke waiting to be made, too.

Suck My Balls August 6, 2011 at 2:18 am

This is bad! If Fox starts snarking itself Wonketters are going to start getting laid off.

smokefilleddoommate August 6, 2011 at 2:56 am

Who got the game ball?

Negropolis August 6, 2011 at 3:39 am

Looking at that line-up, are we sure that Spike Lee didn't just takeover the Ocean's franchize?

Ocean's Fourteen: Always Bet on Black

horsedreamer_1 August 8, 2011 at 10:57 am

Bamboozled is a great way to describe the debt-ceiling deal.

jus_wonderin August 6, 2011 at 8:06 am

"Oh my, I think I am getting the vapors."

or,

"Look at all those fine menz. Snap."

or

"Jeb, what ya thin' theys all worth. Just a round figer."

Warpde August 6, 2011 at 2:17 pm

From Fox Nation.

"-DINNER: BBQ chicken, ribs, hamburgers, hot dogs, pasta, salad." ???

"-DESSERT: apple, peach, huckleberry and cherry pies; chocolate cake." ???

What the F?
Everyone knows a good Kenyan dinner has Ugali and Fish, Githeri, Mursik, Nyama Choma and Ingoho.
With a follow up Dessert of Kirsch-flavoured Pawpaw Soufflé, Mahamri I, Coupe Mount Kenya and my favorite………wait for it………….Biskuti ya Nazi'.

Look em up.
I shit you not.

scionkirk August 6, 2011 at 2:41 pm

What I find hilarious is the classism, like Fox News got hacked by the Revolutionary Communist Party.

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:40 pm

Stupid, 'Tarded, Incompetent, and Ignorant.

Negropolis August 6, 2011 at 1:34 am

The Asses of Evil, if you will.

poncho_pilot August 5, 2011 at 4:41 pm

a can of worms we've opened.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLEhh_XpJ-0

Sue4466 August 5, 2011 at 5:02 pm

Thanks for that flashback. It brought back a lot of anger and that was before the stuff about Terry Schiavo.

As pissed as I am at Obama, at least he is not Bush. (which should not be his campaign slogan)

__kth__ August 5, 2011 at 5:12 pm

always wondered who the alt-country-lite douche was in that picture.

anniegetyerfun August 5, 2011 at 5:13 pm

Everybody Loves Me, Baby (Don McLean) – which I have long suspected WAS written about Dubya.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: