New Mike Huckabee Cartoon Reveals True Story of Bush And 9/11 Terrorism

  9/11 cartoons

Huckabee preparing to hold a shotgun to the head of a black American.Excess skin collection bucket Mike Huckabee has been having a ball ever since he discovered how devastatingly cheaply Taiwanese animators are able to computer visualize his conservative evangelical sex fantasies. His library of cartoon videos is so far is mostly fantasia flavors of “Reagan + Jesus kill black muggers and Nazis,” which are all pretty typical, which means, eh, we probably saw this latest one coming, too: here is Mike Huckabee’s “9/11 sex dream” video, which he will share with all of you under the nominal pretense of educating your children about what “really happened” in Real American history. So, Mike, what “really happened” on 9/11? Were they devil space grasshoppers attacking the Twin Towers? Nancy Pelosi’s wigs? Let’s watch:

No! It was dancing men in turbans with mysterious terrible Russian accents! (Actually, we don’t know what accent the cartoon terrorists have. Anyone?)  OF COURSE, we always knew it was the Russians Turks French Mongols whatever: it is some shrieking guys George W. Bush killed when he and America won the war on terrorism, just like it said they would, in the Da Vinci Code.

[Learn Our History]

Related

 
Related video

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

210 comments

    1. poncho_pilot

      Huckabee's gonna get those bomb bay doors open if he has to hairlip everyone in Bear Creek.

    2. Beowoof

      Don't you just wish the dog in the picture would bite him and his precious bodily fluids would drain away.

    1. Barb

      Shhh, the secret service sent Bin Laden a birthday party invite. Even terrorist like festive buttery baked goods and will show up if there is cake. I hear that Sadam fell for an invite that mentioned a "Fudgey the Whale" cake.

      1. DahBoner

        Hey, if Bush hadn't been so incompetant in catching Bin Laden, Obama never even would have had a chance to get him!

        THANK YOU MISTER BOOSH!

  1. Barb

    Bush said, "I can hear you…." to the crowd. Yes, he can! He can hear our cell phone calls and track us like a tagged duck that Marlin Perkins just had his way with. His abuse of power needs to END!

    I'd like to see Lady Gaga throw one of her shoes at him.

  2. arihaya

    for all the good things happened to America since year 2000 it is Bush who should be praised

    for all the bad things, blame the black guy

    1. powersuit

      There are good things that happened to America since 2000? Besides the SF Giants winning the World Series and Obama's election (in that order)? Do tell!

      1. Gleem_McShineys

        What if he were sprinkled throughout, in little bits?

        You know, ground-up little bits?

    1. Oblios_Cap

      I'm really starting to regret all the time and money that I spent on that lie-beral schooling.

  3. Doktor Zoom

    That "Time Cycle Academy' looks like it would be pretty lousy beer.

    And why are little children spying on the Oval Office with bee-sized drones? Is that yet another security threat that GWB ignored?

  4. donner_froh

    I like the way the title is presented: Learn OUR History–not that left-wing stuff that talks about slavery, genocide and endless war, but OUR history where Amerikkka is always right.

    1. mavenmaven

      And where Saddam (see how they snuck his picture in there) was behind al qaeda and the Iraq war was justified.

    2. SorosBot

      And where the founding fathers were all Christians, the Civil War was fought over the nebulous concept of "state's rights" and not slavery, the Nazis were somehow liberal, and we would have won in Vietnam if it wasn't for those damned hippies.

    3. Jukesgrrl

      U.S. America IS always right. Why do u think TV calls cunservatives RIGHT?!! Read Gov. Palin's tweets she will skool u on exxxcepshunalism. dont try to libbel her/

  5. johnnyzhivago

    They should have had the White House a week BEFORE 9/11:

    Bush: "Al Queda determined to attack America? Dang Al-who??? The next fool who interrupts me while I'm pack-in for vacation is going to see my terror attack! Fly airplanes into buildings? That's the craziest shit I seen since the Texas fair. Who in tarnation would fly an airplane into a building?"

  6. slithytoves

    With that camo hunting gear I'm surprised Huckabee has survived this long, or his dog, for that matter. Who fucking camos their dog when hunting?

    1. Oblios_Cap

      I can certainly see where he got the nickname "Gomer" from. He's a dead ringer for Jim Nabors in that picture.

    2. SudsMcKenzie

      Whenever I see that picture I imagine their hunting down the person who "escaped from the cellar".

  7. metamarcisf

    That's a pretty nice looking dog he shot. Looks like his in-bred dumb-ass sons will be eating good tonight.

  8. Native_of_SL_UT

    "Death to America" is what OBL said to us.
    What he said to his followers in the desert was actually "Let's bankrupt those stupid fucks."

  9. Oblios_Cap

    Excess skin collection bucket Mike Huckabee

    Verbosity is a sin; a simple "human shit bucket Mike Huckabee" would have been a better way to describe him.

      1. Beowoof

        With all the jerking off he does on camera in those repeal the health care ads, I am surprised at the bloat.

  10. DaRooster

    Nothing about the Bush family allowing OBL's family to leave the country directly after?
    Nothing about Iraq's WMDs and how completely related they were to 9/11?
    Nothing about letting the first responders die without healthcare?

    Seems like the whole "history" to me…

    1. SorosBot

      Hell, nothing about the many, many warnings from the outgoing Clinton appointees that the Bush administration ignored because they didn't like the Clintons, or the attempt to get bin Laden in 1998 that the GOP congress put a stop to while screaming, "No blood for Monica!".

    2. An_Outhouse

      nothing about when banking rule changes were proposed to cut off the terrorists' funding, Dick Armey, tea bag welfare provider, lobbied to stop the changes.

    3. HogeyeGrex

      See right there at the end? It says "Learn Our History" not learn actual history, silly.

  11. Oblios_Cap

    Geez. What tripe.

    Those kids – including the cute black girl – must all be Republicans. Because that's the face they always make whenever things aren't proceeding quite the way they expect.

  12. genxr

    I thought it was pretty accurate. Right after 9/11, Bush stamped "DECEASED" on a picture of bin Laden and called it a day.

    1. JustPixelz

      WRONG. Right after the attacks, Dubya sat like a gargoyle in a Florida classroom. Then went into hiding. Then attacked Iraq to resolve his Oedipal issues.

      1. An_Outhouse

        He peed himself terribly but I'm not sure where that fit into the whole chronology. I think right before or after the going into hiding.

  13. BaldarTFlagass

    All the cops and firemen running around at 0:45 must have been sent by the Ministry of Silly Runs.

    1. DaRooster

      I found the "Everyone came together" note followed by the spastic, everyone running every direction in the next shot quite well thought out.

  14. DashboardBuddha

    OT: As of 11:55 the market is down 347 points. I wonder if this is what Oct 1929 looked like.

  15. dduke45

    Can't wait for the sequel: "Bush Kills Osama: Elected President for Life: Likeness Being Carved into Mt. Rushmore".

    1. JustPixelz

      The sequel is President Rick Perry. We can relive the faith-based economic solutions and "cowboy" foreign policy we enjoyed during Dubya's reign of error. Plus: No term limits on VP so we can have Cheney again.

  16. scionkirk

    And the brave and glorious President George W Bush, in his ultimate wisdom, acted bravely and swiftly to do the only thing that could possibly bring down this threat to American moms' and puppies' liberty – cut taxes for rich people.

    1. Steverino247

      And the brave and glorious President George W Bush, in his ultimate wisdom, acted bravely and swiftly to do the only thing that could possibly bring down this threat to American moms' and puppies' liberty – wet his pants in an elementary school classroom.

      /fixed

      1. genxr

        Brave Sir Robin ran away.
        Bravely ran away, away!
        When danger reared its ugly head,
        He bravely turned his tail and fled.
        Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about
        And gallantly he chickened out.
        Bravely taking to his feet
        He beat a very brave retreat,
        Bravest of the brave, Sir Robin!

        He is packing it in and packing it up
        And sneaking away and buggering up
        And chickening out and pissing off home,
        Yes, bravely he is throwing in the sponge…

  17. Oblios_Cap

    I was hoping that the Bin-Laden guy would shoot that rock at 0:40. He looked pretty pissed at it.

  18. DahBoner

    What really happened on 9/11?

    Rumsfeld issued an order on June 1, 2001 to supersede earlier DOD procedures for dealing with hijacked aircraft, and it requires that Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld is personally responsible for issuing intercept orders.

    When the hijackers attacked, Rumsfeld was nowhere to be found to issue an intercept order.

    Operation Provide An Excuse For Invading Iraq = 100% success.

  19. donner_froh

    The part about Bush kind of forgetting about Bin Laden for six years so Obama had to get him must be in later chapters of this amazing cartoon learning experience.

  20. ironhead77

    Seriously, I fucking love this shit!!! More laughs a in a minute and 48 seconds than the entire running time of "Lottery Ticket."

  21. nappyduggs

    Depending on whose side you're on, Bin Laden's digi lips look either really pouty or like every ethnic stereotype drawn by the genius animators at Warner Bros. back in the 1940s.
    Either way, GWB was a goddamned dumbass.

  22. owhatever

    George: Hey, Laura, fetch me another beer and watch the teevee. Them terrorists have done knocked down two more towers.

    Laura: That's just a kid's cartoon, dear.

    George: I'll invade Massachusetts this time.

  23. BlueStateLibel

    You are not going to get me to watch that abomination, my outrage meter has already been tripped this week, and now it only makes this pathetic "whirr, whirr" sound.

  24. SorosBot

    Since Huck's so into alternative histories, is he going to release a video about how he won the nomination in 2008, went on to beat Obama in the general election and is now President?

    Also, nice to see that my Firefox spellchecker appears to finally know Obama is not a typo.

  25. poncho_pilot

    the world needs a Bugs Bunny/Elmer Fudd type of cartoon with Bin Laden and Bush. what crazy scheme will Bush concoct this week? how will OBL outwit him again? buy war bonds.

    1. Doktor Zoom

      Ooooh, that wascally tewwowist!

      Then throw in Daffy Duck as Saddam Hussein: Invade me now! Invade me now!

      1. poncho_pilot

        throw in a nod to Warner Bros.' low-rent cousin, Hanna-Barbera:

        nab him,
        jab him,
        tab him,
        grab him,
        stop that Islam now!

      1. poncho_pilot

        fuck. i haven't seen either in ten years. i remember joking about a former boss sucking the stem cells out of babies to stay alive only to be told that South Park did something similar. assholes. stealing my jokes :)

  26. not that Dewey

    "Hey! Look at all those police and firefighters! They're running right into the middle of it! Let's cut their wages, call them thugs, and destroy their unions!"

      1. Dr_Zoidberg

        Wow, you've got an express ticket straight to Hell, don't you? Ask for a window seat – those are the best.

  27. HedonismBot

    Americans "came together like never before."
    And they would still be together, if not for those rotten lieberals screaming about things like how the Patriot Act "infringes on civil rights." (Does the Constitution say anything about "rights?") And they would still be together if not for those rotten lieberals who refuse to believe in the supremacy and wisdom of the free market. And they would still be "together" if those rotten lieberals would just shut the hell up and let "their" president act like a Republican already, even though no amount of conservatism on Obama's part will ever convince the real Republicans that he is one of them.
    But what am I saying? Those people aren't really "American," so, "real Americans" are still pretty much together on this stuff.

  28. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    If the Democrats in congress had not stopped Bush's plan for him and Cheney to go over to Afghanistan personally with shot guns, this would have all been over in 2002.

  29. Ducksworthy

    Kirsten, I'm going to accept that your description of this insane thing is accurate and not expose my still tender brain to the ravings of the Huckabeast. OK? Thanks.

  30. Redhead

    Oh gee, I sure feel safer knowing that Bush personally killed Bin Laden, instead of leaving that to Obama while he exploited images of 9/11 – and the fear and patriotism and fear that went with them – as a political tool while ignoring the health issues the first responders had after the attack.

  31. peaceshelly

    Hey! Look at all those police and firefighters! They're running right into the middle of it!! How about in a few years from now, when they are dying of respiratory problems let's question their motives and patriotism and cut funding for their healthcare!!! "YEAH!!!!!

    Not a mention of the pentagon…it was also "attacked" on 9/11…lest we tend to forget.

    Fucking propaganda

    1. finallyhappy

      I remember my nephew waiting a week after 9/11 to get home to his family on the West Coast and yet the Bin Ladens flew home on 9/12. BUT there are no connections between the Bushes and the Saudis.

  32. peaceshelly

    I the words of a REAL JOURNALIST….damn it…Jeff Gannon aka James Guckert the male hooker prostitute/ White House corespondent….

    Aren't the Republican's DIVORCED from reality???

  33. iburl

    I noticed that the video didn't show the part where Pretzelnet Bush heroically continued to chill out with the kindergardeners while the country was under attack. They must be saving that for the theatrical release.

    1. not that Dewey

      Brave George W ran away
      Bravely ran away away
      When danger reared its ugly head,
      He bravely turned his tail and fled
      Yes Brave George W turned about
      And gallantly he chickened out
      Bravely taking to his feet
      He beat a very brave retreat
      Bravest of the brave George W

    1. horsedreamer_1

      On the heels of The Book of Mormon, I see the South Park guys (plus the dude who wrote the recent Winne the Pooh movie version) having their next hit with this.

    1. BaldarTFlagass

      In the upper left hand corner of the page you linked to, it says that the Liberty Kids are presented by "The Incredible World of DIC." Are these people from another planet?

      1. not that Dewey

        I have NO idea. I came home from work one day to find my 4-year-old watching and not quite understanding this show. She said "Look Daddy! This show is about America!"

        It features lots of convenient amnesia about slavery, was the main thing I noticed. So, yeah. Teaparty.

      2. poncho_pilot

        as i remember from my childhood misspent watching Inspector Gadget, they pronounce it Deek. doesn't mean i didn't laugh about it years later.

  34. fartknocker

    343 FDNY firefighters and over 2,400 others died on 9-11. Huckabee capitalizes on the loss of those firefighters through a 108 second cartoon. As someone who attended 3 funerals where firefighters died in the line of duty all I will say is: Fuck You Mike Huckabee.

    If I'm every within 100 miles of Mike Huckabee I will make it my primary mission to meet him and personally tell him that he's nothing more than a pandering asshole.

    I am thoroughly disgusted with Mike Huckabee and his ilk.

  35. rocktonsam

    so a cartoon needs to be made of real time video to explain 9/11 to the kids of retards.

    eat my shorts Chucklebee.

  36. x111e7thst

    Why did he leave out the part where Dick Cheney waterboards Valery Palme and discovers where her husband hid the Yellowcake. That episode always brings tears to my eyes.

  37. Callyson

    "But they never counted on America coming together like never before"
    Yeah, because in WWII, America didn't suffer shortages of consumer goods for the sake of supplying our troops…
    Oh, but at least W was able to kill bin Laden…that united the American people…

    1. foog

      They never counted on America coming together to create trite little cartoons that are egregious, misleading, and oversimplify history like never before. Oh, and never hire a copy editor cause it's only a few lines of text and never ain't nuthin that could look dumb. Never again!

  38. gurukalehuru

    I guess WTC 7 was just too wide to animate.

    Also, when you are hunting, aren't you supposed to wear orange or some other highly visible color, so that other hunters will not mistake you for a deer and shoot your fat ass? I don't hunt, but it seems to me I heard that somewhere.

  39. DemonicRage

    Thank goodness, now there is an accurate record, so that when the Olds die off, people will still pass on the knowledge of just what it was like. I only watched up to the point where two clouds of grey smoke were coming out of the Towers and there was one lady with vermillion skin, to distinguish her from all the "white" people standing near her. Yup! That's exactly what it was like in Lower Manhattan that day. 28 white people standing around and one vermillion lady.

  40. SheriffRoscoe

    They used a B-717 in the cartoon, which as any airplane nerd like me knows, looks nothing like a B-767. Gah. That little detail right there ruined my enjoyment of the film.

  41. CapnFatback

    Boy, how are Mallard Fillmore and the Right-bow Coalition gonna get outta this week's wacky scrape?

  42. Reader11722

    Forget Huckabee and his propaganda 9/11 cartoon (about as accurate as the 9/11 Commission Report). Don’t waste your hard-earned money, instead read a BANNED 9/11 book like “America Deceived II” by a real rebel and the “World’s Most Hated Author”, E.A. Blayre III.
    Last link (before Google Books bans it also]: http://www.iuniverse.com/Bookstore/BookDetail.asp

  43. greypanter

    Didn't the chronology make it appear that Dubya had something to do with killing OBL? That's not the way I remember it.

    1. Gleem_McShineys

      Uh oh, sounds like you need a little more cartoon therapy to help you with those awful hallucinations!

  44. teebob2000

    Oh, Jesus Christ on a falafel. I can now die having seem KSM rendered in animated form for a children's cartoon.

    This is probably about as fact-based as the Osama-Saddam cartoon that Smigel did for SNL several years ago where they turned themselves in a bag of pork rinds and the car from fucking Dukes of Hazzard.

  45. finallyhappy

    on Youtube is a preview of the "reagan Revolution" by this organization. It shows 1977 in DC -"the economy is in ruins"(or something like that) and then it shows a black kid in a T-shirt that says "disco" holding a knife and demanding someone's money. So is this whole thing a satire or is the preview video I saw actually a serious video from this group?

  46. Walkinwiddaking

    You failed to mention that 20 seconds after that picture of Huckabee was snapped he shot his Retriever in the face.

  47. Pat_Pending

    Trying to snark, but… oh, it's just so ungodly STOOPID. My brain melted after the little police and firefighters all converged on each other in some kind of tragic 'coming together' dogpile.

  48. LetUsBray

    This certainly does support my working hypothesis that Hucklenuts is a pathological liar.

    And the video doesn't even say how "My Pet Goat" turned out.

    1. Dr_pangloss

      It would have been good to show prezident dipshit "projecting calm" to those kids in that class. "Ok Georgie, project calm, wouldn't want to start a stampeed of kids. I'd end up lookin like that chubby feller from Seinfeld. 'Merica needs you now more than ever."

  49. Dr_pangloss

    I love that the one stupid kid screams "No". He's from the future right? And what's with the bugging the White House? What are they the future leaders of the CIA?

    Seriously who writes this crap.

Comments are closed.