Here is what most people know about Indian American governor Nikki Haley: she is the only human on Earth rumored to ever have sex with a political blogger, and she is the only minority female human on Earth ever to be the unfortunate ruler of South Carolina. What is a lesser-known fact about Haley is that she is also a white human! True story! Acccording to the box she checked on her voter registration card, Nimrata Nikki Randhawa Haley is a not-minority white person. Is it just because non-white people are not allowed to vote in the South? No, it is because Nikki Haley acts white and loves her white state of mind and voting like a white person. She is so white, in fact, that she responded to a request by the NAACP to finally get rid of the dumb, racist Confederate flag in front of the Statehouse with a very white-persony, “nah.”
From the Columbia Free-Times:
In the wake of a call from the president of the NAACP for Gov. Nikki Haley — as the state’s first minority governor — to work toward removing the Confederate flag from State House grounds, a copy of Haley’s voter registration card obtained by Free Times reveals that the governor self-identifies as white.
In comments that have reverberated throughout the national media, NAACP President Benjamin Todd Jealous said that Haley, “South Carolina’s first governor of color,” should ask herself, “What would Gandhi do?” in relation to the flag.
The daughter of Sikh immigrants from India, Haley downplayed her race during her come-from-behind campaign for governor in the 2010 elections; however, the national media has often played up her Indian-American heritage.
While the governor self-identifies as white, her sister self-identifies as Asian on her voter registration card, according to an official at the Lexington County Election Commission.
Very interesting that Nikki’s parents managed to have one white and one non-white child. We look forward to seeing what sort of “one blogger, one human” combination comes out of her next affair. [Free-Times]
{ 219 comments }
Her parents must be so proud.
"What? You couldn't be governor and neurosurgeon?!"
Sikhs deny the caste system, which Haley is doing in her own way.
Sikhs don't *have* a caste system, although they certainly still have a class system.
Cut her some slack. There wasn't a box to check for 'self loathing minority who needs racist crackers to believe she just has a good tan'.
Bitch never worked for anyone else in her life except Mom and Dad, and managed to file their business taxes late every time. If she'd actually *had* a real job, she would've been fired. She's also got some huge money scandals on her rap sheet. Still waiting for it to hit the fan, though.
"Our son is a cardiac surgeon, our daughter is a brain surgeon, and our other daughter is white!"
Wins the immigrant "our kids…" contest, every time.
She's from southern India?
Evansville?
The Sikh from French Lick
Sikh, means Punjabi,, northern Indian
Sikhism is actually a religion, most of whose members – though not all – are Punjabi. It is not necessarily indicative of complexion.
I find this particular thread rather lame.
Give her a break – she's a light-skinned Untouchable.
self-loathing enough?
FWIW, Clarence Thomas self-identifies as white, too.
FWIW Thomas is white. Al Sharpton ex-communicated him.
Ben Jealous
That name is freaking awesome.
Oh, and "Aunt Nikki", and also, too, to go along with "Uncle Tom" (or Herman).
Uncle Clarence Thomas.
I was thinking "Darling Nikki" but maybe I should put down the iPod.
Wow. I, for one, am glad that someone kept their EYES WIDE OPEN and noticed that the traitor flag is still offensive, even though blacks are no longer ON SALE NOW in the South.
Advertising is a bitch, isn't it?
Wait wait wait-blacks were on sale?! And I missed it?!
That's Gross.
No, THIS is Gross.
Come on man, we should be excited Wonkette is becoming a viable commercial platform for the first time since retard-gate.
I still miss our giantess overlord (overlady?) Campbell Brown.
There has to be an outsourcing joke here somewhere.
Does she actually live in South Carolina? Or do they just fly her in for "training" and stuff?
Republican governors don't actually "govern", unless you count taking away the jobs and rights of the citizens, so they don't actually have to be there to "do" their jobs. Look at Gov. Sanford, who was "hiking" (up the skirts) in Argentina, but most people in South Carolina didn't even notice that their governor wasn't around.
In S. Carolina it's considered a full time job just hatin' Obummer. Anything outside of that is just showing off.
I wonder if she can help me set up my DSL account on AT&T…
Judging from her actions as a member of Mark Sanford's team and since then as Governor, you'd be lucky if she could help you use a fucking vacuum cleaner. She is really not the brightest incendiary device in the armory.
Call Dell, you'll find it there.
Her responses to phone calls must go like this: put the caller on hold for half an hour; repeatedly ask the caller to repeat the question; keep caller waiting while they consult the user manual; leave caller waiting for half an hour; say they don't know; give caller another number to call that, when called, emits busy signal.
Somewhere in there, she reminds the caller their state government will no longer be supported after December 2011unless they purchase the extended warranty.
Ha, ha, the joke's on SC.
All those textile and furniture jobs that went overseas and they elect her to lead them into the 21st century. A state where 11th grade is an advanced degree. Ha, ha, ha.
This is corroborating evidence (along with the blogger-sex) that she could also be categorized as 'self-hating'.
also, "fucking twat".
Indians as a minority? On what planet? There are goddamn billions of them.
On the planet Murika.
One out of every six people on the planet. But not billions yet. And they are a minority in the state she purports to govern.
Hmmm, maybe if you just count the Indians in India. But if you count Canada, UK, Australia, South Africa, etc., then 7 out of every 6 people on the planet are Indian.
And 99 out of every 100 on the help line.
Pox News math wins every time!
I bet the British Raj would have had something to say about this.
Too late. Haha!
With all due respect, the Raj refers to a regime or a period, not a person, so it would be most unlikely to have anything to "say." Sorry to be nitpicking, but a certain degree of ignorance seems to permeate this discussion.
I'm well aware of what the term implies, just figured that "Raj" would be a little more accessible to most; a reference to "General Reginald Dyer" or "Lord Lytton" or "Sir Richard Strachey" would probably peg the obscurometer.
Your cryptic moniker marks you as a man or woman of culture and I am prepared to believe that you know those things. I was just bothered by the tone of most comments, which I found immature and silly.
pedant much? needs moar snarky.
Do you think she has a direct line to Bobby Jindal? Funny the little brown people are taking over governor jerbs in the cracker-assed-crackerest parts of Murica. But I want to see some real commitment from the Indian subcontinent. Alabama or Mississippi or GTF O.
Very interesting that Nikki’s parents managed to have one white and one non-white child
The milkman sends his regards.
Today we are all doodhwalas.
Shouldn't we go all Sanskrity, shuddha-Hindi, and refer to ourselves as dugdhawallahs?
Is "wog" Sanskrit?
Chocolate milkman I think you meant. Or at least coffee milkman.
Sir, my father was a milkman. Would you like to meet my half-siblings? Quite a crowd.
Lisa: We're all Immigrants….except for Native Americans
Homer: Like me
Lisa: No, I mean American Indians.
Apu: Like me.
You know what other politician was half-white?
my cat and Hopey?
John Boner?
Which half?
more half-orange…a light tangerine
Jefferson….Oh wait that was his kids.
Storm Thurmond also, too
Boehner before he flips over on the tanning bed?
Bill Clinton. I've heard his bottom half is more in the Mandingo tradition.
Chief White Halfoat?
Sure could use to have his family around again, help solve the oil shortage.
I just came a little at the C-22 reference.
Napoleon! (Because Josephine, right?)
Clarence Thomas?
It's the half-wits we ought to worry about.
Is that Indian as in dot or woo woo woo?
Indian oppressed by American white people or Indian oppressed by British white people?
Here it's 'as in dot or feather?'
I prefer "as in flat-head twin".
Teepee or Curry?
Casino or Tech Support?
Push start (dot) or pull start (feather)?
So teh geeky.
We look forward to seeing what sort of “one blogger, one human” combination comes out of her next affair.
Don Surber
P.S. Thank you for the upfists, kind people, before I even managed to fix this mangled comment.
~
Ohjeezusdon'tclickonthelinkifyouvalueyourlife.
Just make sure you pull that ladder up behind you.
So I can self-identify as having a huge dick?
Why not? I'm self-identifying henceforth as a Fairy Princess.
From now on, I'm a job creator.
This is closer to self-identifying as being a huge dick.
Law blogger Ann Althouse is said to have married a commenter on her blog, which is even stranger. Sully does not approve.
Bobby Jindal Indian-American Governor of Louisiana
Nikki Haley Indian-American Governor of SC
Jeff Davis must be rolloing over in his grave.
Nah…they are obviously both White! Duh…just look at their names. I hate it when some Indian customer service dude tells me his name is Bob.
My favourite antebellum South fact: Chang and Eng owned slaves.
Just think what it's doing to Andrew Jackson.
(Who gets that one?)
She's not an Indian. The only Indians I know either sling curry, or are the head of the Robotics Department at an ivy league school.
I thought she was Apache somehow.
Kemosabe! Jump on it!
BEST FUCKIN' ROLLERSKATING SONG EVAR!!!!!
She had a little Apache in her once.
She may call herself white, but I bet she still has a bush like a crow's nest.
Righto! They may have a taint, but you sure can't see it.
high up, often occupied by a sailor?
It was a typo.
That, and her electorate don't yet realize she's not white. So she's trying to keep the misunderstanding going.
She just suffers from re-vitiligo.
So how does this effect Alvin Greene?
Greene is done meddling in petty state politics. He's going for the big job!
http://www.alvingreene2012.com/
Most South Carolinians, on the other hand, assumed she was either Jewish or Chinese.
Sorry, when I visited her hometown of Bamberg SC in 1974, I was the only Jew there.
True story. The confederate cracker flag is a diagonal cross because of the huge Jewish population in Charleston SC that helped finance the start of the Civil War. They figured if they displayed the jesus cross a little askew they could have their Judeo-finance and their Jesus cross too. No word on if there were a lot of Lieberman's in Charleston when they fired on Fort Sumter- but if I were a betting man…
Or "some kind of Spanish."
Or Eye-talian
Or the word that covers all Asians: Chinaman.
Dude, "Chinaman" is not the preferred nomencla…Asian-American, please.
Pat Nixon: "Dick wasn't anti-Semitic.. he hated all minorities. I remember once an aide referred to the Vietnamese as Gooks and Chinks. Dick said that that was wrong. He said a Chink is someone who's from China, and is Gook is anyone of the Oriental persuasion. A Chink is always a Gook, but a Gook isn't always a Chink..
–Saturday Night LIve
Uhhh… you know I was joking, right?
Helpful hint: If you're going to hang out at Wonkette, you need to be able to recognize Big Lebowski references in one sentence or less. Familiarity with Repo Man and all of the Monty Python films is helpful, too.
OR BOTH!!
This is good news for Bobby Jindal.
Needs more exorcisms.
Won't removing the Confederate Flag confuse everybody there, since all their textbooks tell them that they won the war against "Northern Aggression?"
"Touch me, I'm Sikh" is the new "Say it loud, I'm black and proud"
Damn crackers….always trying to keep the black man/woman down!
She doesn't count as a Plantation Republican, however, does she?
Over here we've got the sexy blogger part and over here we've got "come-from-behind" quote and I'm looking at these pieces and I'm thinking "a truly clever snarker would figure out how to get those together." I gotta get back to work though.
She could be accused of selling her soul, but that presupposes the existence of her soul.
should ask herself, “What would Gandhi do?” in relation to the flag.
Evidence suggests he would put a spinning wheel on it.
I would have said "worn it as a lungi", but what do I know*?
*Everything, as I married a South Asian person and am now an expert.
She may think of herself as White, but she still enjoys a good "slurpee" if you get my meaning.
Ham Biscuits doesn't like her one bit, no sir.
Gandhi would have had a torrid affair with Candice Bergen, for starters.
Wouldn't we all. Wouldn't we all.
Bloody self-hating wog…
"she is the only human on Earth rumored to ever have sex with a political blogger"
Hey KBJ, I volunteer to be second, ifyaknowwhatImean…
i wish you're not a Congressman,, otherwise you may have to resign for 'unwanted sexual advance'
Get in line motherfucker.
Nyunk nyunk
I was sort of titillated by the Columbia Free Times' reference to her come-from-behind campaign.
She converted when she got married.
Into what?
A Decepticon.
She converted when she became a Repubican.
True fact: Back in the olde days, the gummint tried to define "white" in terms of specific facial characteristics. To avoid using skin color which sometimes lets someone with a single drop of black blood look white. Anyway, a dark-skinned guy from India whose face was white-by-law, went to the Supreme Court to gain citizenship. After hearing the evidence the court ruled he was not white. Sorry Nikki, SCOTUS says you ain't white-folk.
Lets see the birth certificate… Long form. Thank you.
"She is so white, in fact, that…." she thinks ketchup is a vegetable?
Tomatoes are a fruit, which makes ketchup a smoothie.
The Republican Party, where even the minorities are ashamed of being minorities.
Allen West approves this comment.
It makes you believe in the great promise of this country to see a new race step up and embrace idioticy.
This confirms what I was told many years ago, most Inidan girls go both ways.
I beginning to think that the one on the Vonage commercial will bang anything.
Only in America!
What?
"Very interesting that Nikki’s parents managed to have one white and one non-white child"
That's not impossible, my uncle had one white and one non-white child.
Oh wait, that was with two different wives; never mind.
Fun fact: Nikki was born on the same day that Dick Nixon was inaugurated for the second time.
Well, she is (Indo-)Aryan.
There's a story that Hitler had Nazi scientists go search for the original Aryans – those who had deviated least from the Indo-European forebears – but was severely disappointed when they came up with a band of North Indian cattle herders.
But they did come back with a really nifty logo.
Persians(Iran)are also of aryan lineage.
And LOTS of milk!
$o, $arah Palin cavorts with terrorists
Ahhh. American exceptionalism at work again. You can only be exceptional when you are like everyone else.
As the locals down there would say, she's got a convenience store owner in the woodpile.
well now i have an earworm of 'hey nicky you're so fine' buzzing around in my head.
still. better than any of the news that i could be listening to…
That's Not Pawnee, That's Sikh!
God, that was bad…
Sex with Nikki Haley? I can't imagine a political blogger doing any such thing.
Upper Caste Indians always think they are privileged and better than everybody else. So is it any surprise she thinks she is white?
Kshatriya chatur varna Proud!
"White people ignore the NAACP like this, but Indian Americans ignore the NAACP like this."
"What would Gandhi do"?
From what I understand about Gandhi, he'd strip her naked, drop his robe and sleep up against her, flexing his tool in her butt cheeks but being careful to not spill his precious bodily fluid into her. Or maybe that was the blogger.
Funniest one I've read yet. Then again, my brains are frying after another 100F+ day, and I'm tired, so don't get a fathead over it.
With 5 lousy thumbs up after 5 hours I'll take what I can get.
"Very interesting that Nikki’s parents managed to have one white and one non-white child."
Obviously Nikki didn't get the one drop.
From the Desk of Indian Governor Nikki Haley
Re: NAACP Request Concerning the State Flag
Dear Buffalo Soldiers,
Bite me..
She's a big let down to her family and tradition as she's not a cardiologist or even an anesthesiologist, so her pretending to be just white is understandable.
This just goes to show that in America any child can grew up to be whatever she or he wants to be.
Is this a great country or what?
Has anyone ever seen Nikki Haley and Michelle Malkin in the same room at the same time?
You mean, and lived?
She's got a white name. She looks like a white girl with a good tan. She speaks like a white girl. She apparently fucks white men exclusively. I'm betting the average voter in her State would simply collapse with the vapors if they discovered she was a Dot-Head. Fortunately they are an ignorant and incurious lot, so the likelihood of that ever happening are slim and none.
The Governor is near!
As near as Barry, but I guess near don't count in politics.
If Nikki was an observant Sikh dude, she would have been Pullstarti, not Pushstarti, right?
My ignorance in this realm is palpable.
If you get depressed over here, you can do what I do and enjoy the AFA website where today Bryan Fischer calls Grizzly Bears the Jeffery Dahmers of the Animal Kingdom.
ooh, another Bryan Fissure & the Bears column?
EDIT: I just LOVE THIS GUY!!!!!!
As I have written before, God’s word to ancient Israel was that a growing danger from wild animals is a sign of a nation in rebellion against God. “If you will not listen to me and will not do all these commandments…I will let loose the wild beasts against you, which shall bereave you of your children and destroy your livestock” (Leviticus 26:14, 22).
In the case of the United States, there is no need for God to “let loose the wild beasts” against us, because we are doing a fine job of it all by ourselves. And we are doing it to ourselves because we have rejected the teaching of Scripture that God has given to man authority over the animal kingdom. Man has been given authority by God over the earth, to “subdue it and have dominion over…every living thing that moves on the earth” (Genesis 1:28). This authority certainly extends to putting predators out of our misery.
Someone needs to let that guy in on the fact that Stephen Colbert is parody.
I'd hit that.
I'll bet Nikki's sari now.
Aah, you beat me to it. I was going to paraphrase Brenda Lee:
"Who's sari, now?"
The spawn of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes?
I was going to go with "She's soooo sari."
She had secks with an UGLY blogger, no less.
Sticky Nikki loves cock of all shapes, colors, and creeds.
So, she's really a gay man, too?
Darling Nikki loves to grind.
If the universe was fair, she'd be ruler of Indiana. Thank you very much, I'll be here all week. Remember to tip your waitress.
Pshaw! Nikki Haley is no more "white" than Italians, Jews, Spaniards, Greeks or similar Exotics.
Does this have any impact on the paler groups – Czechs, Slavs, etc.? I want to be an "exotic", too!
Two things, if she were of mixed-breed like O'bama, and she were of the DemocRAT Party, Sarah'd be spitting her full name "Nimrata Nikki Randhawa Haley" on Fox News all the time and find a reason to always mention she is half-white? Like Obama (that point is still lost on me, why would Sarah think that is a matter in her favor when trashing the POTUS?)
What about that other Indian trying to pass, Tonto? He never voted in any comix I saw.
"What you mean 'we,' Paleface?"
she is the only human on Earth rumored to ever have sex with a political blogger
Sara K Smith did somebody to produce Baby K Smith.
Benchaud!
In the game of "Hide Or Go Sikh", Nikki has made her choice.
To get elected Governor, she had to Curry favor with whitey.
To curry favor, favor curry.
Had Eric Burdon known it was this easy to change race we might have been spared countless renditions of "House of the Rising Sun".
Man so much for the melting pot, she's gone straight to smelting pot.
White Not White had a couple hits there in the '80s. Are they the guys that did "Darling Nikki"?
I'm self-indentifying as my ancestors oppressed her ancestors.
Lizzie, don't you look lovely today.
Thanks! That is the lovely Ena Sharples AKA Violet Carson.
Who?
Nick Danger, Third Eye.
Why do we have racial check boxes on voting forms anymore? Nevermind, I forgot, it's South Carolina and the south will rise again because Obama agrees that his hands are tied.
Okay. Cough up the birf certificate. If one parent listed Hindoo as the religion, Nikki's heading for a walk on that long Appalachian Trail.
Fuck her and Piyush for pretending they're not Indians. I'm stuck with hughesnet, because their satellite ISP is the only thing we can get here in backwoods Okrahoma, and I have to call tech support from time to time. More often than not, I get some delightful Indian kid and we talk about movies (Bollywood, I should add) and movie stars and if it's a woman, how hot John Abraham is. I was giving one of the kids my account info just this week because I wasn't connecting to the webs and needed a technical roto-rooter fix for what I understand are tubes, and the problem fixed itself before I got to the problem.
Jokingly, I said, "wow. You already fixed it . Get me your manager so I can tell him how well you did. " The kid said, "yes. I will be glad to connect you," and the next thing I know, I'm talking a delightful young Indian woman who couldn't believe an American was not only being polite, but giving them a compliment.
So fuck this woman. Not the nice Indians, but this Haley bitch. Ain't nothin' wrong about being Hindu. She should be ashamed of herself for leaving her religion simply to advance herself, like Piyush and his sellout parents.
I would say Haley's problem is that she IS ashamed of herself. But thanks for representing the US in a good way. I used to cringe when my mom would deal with waitstaff here, I can only imagine what kind of abuse tech folks endure. Although I do have mixed feelings about the whole shipping of of jobs too.
Governor Nimrata Randhawa Haley was an anchor baby in Bamberg, SC.
"She is so white, in fact, that she responded to a request by the NAACP to finally get rid of the dumb, racist Confederate flag in front of the Statehouse with a very white-persony, “nah."
Nah. Let's put up a flag of Vishnu, instead….
Anybody of European,North African,Middle Eastern,West Asian,and South Asian(Indian)extraction is Caucasian(white).How can people be so ignorant about race
Blecch! Too late, my friend.
Dammit… I need to get crackin', then!
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