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Obama’s Tea Party Bill Signed, Stocks Collapse

Fail.Ronald Reagan’s illegitimate son Barack Obama just signed his Tea Party Disaster Bill, which officially makes “being poor” both Illegal and the legal status of 90% of Americans. So will Wall Street finally love Barack Obama a little bit more? No, of course not. Stocks collapsed. This is a Failed State. The value of American stocks has dropped nearly 7% in a week — that’s quite a Vote of Confidence! Meanwhile, regular Americans (the illegal Legally Poor) can add “no emergency social services” to “no jobs” and “no home equity” and “no homes” and “no money.” The 14% of Americans who approve of this destructive insanity are, of course, the Tea Party idiots. But at least Barack Obama gave a really terrible, infuriating little speech in the Rose Garden after spending the past few weeks attacking both his supporters and America in general.

Anybody But Obama in 2012, honestly. Is there an actual Democrat who might like to run for president, and maybe get the WORLD’S BIGGEST ECONOMY functioning again, by using the Power of the Government to create millions of jobs? No, not really. So when you go to sleep tonight with the Fear gnawing at your belly, just repeat three times: “At least Obama is better than _____” and fill in whatever Republican bogeyman.

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419 comments

  1. poorgradstudent

    I can't help but already roll my eyes in advance at how Obama's stalwart Internet Defenders Brigade (TM) are going to spin this one. My poor eyeballs!

    1. pdiddycornchips

      Yeah, I keep thinking back to the heady days. Obama was all hope and inspiration and Hilz was the evil closet Republican (Bill too). Barry's army of Hope Zombies would scold anyone who dared disagree with them that the Clintons were rightwing zealots compared to their dear leader. Oh well, you go to war with the empty suit you have, not the empty suit you wish you had.

      1. pdiddycornchips

        Well played sir. Disagreement with Hopey's policies = deranged teabagger. I am somewhat disappointed you didn't call someone a racist. Must be an oversight.

        1. Cicada

          Nah, it's the fact that you have a cutesy little name like "Obama's stalwart Internet Defenders Brigade (TM)" for anyone who disagrees with you that's annoying. That was Chet's point, silly.

          It's awfully hard to get shit done when you've dismissed a huge number of people who agree with you on most issues as not pure enough.

      2. Cicada

        Obot! LINO! Blargleblarfbleeble!!!!! I DON'T CARE IF WE AGREE ON MOST THINGS, I WILL NEVER WORK WITH YOU TRAITOR!!!1!!!

        I love when liberals sound just like Tea Baggers. It's so…circular. Ah well, off to Free Republic to read about why John Boehner should be primaried for being a communist sympathizer. Maybe I'll catch the latest about why all TRUE conservatives should stay home if Mitt Romney is the nominee while I'm at it.

        1. genxr

          True conservatives should stay home, period. Government is the problem, not the solution, and if you're taking part in government, you're part of the problem.

          Keep yer gubmint hands offa mah gubmint!

          1. Cicada

            The Freepers started banning pro-Mitt posters, because they're all fifth-column traitors undermining the true conservative agenda. I don't think they get irony over there.

      3. poorgradstudent

        *shrug* Obama himself was and continues to be our best proof. You got…cute little insults based on an Internet blog 98% of people haven't heard of?

      4. mooncrushworld

        We are all Firebaggers today man. Those who are not are either Republicans or Wall Street DLC Dems who can afford the coming doubledip.

    2. BaldarTFlagass

      "Now Obama's plan is all coming together! He has the Republicans right where he wants them!! BUHUWAHAHAHAHAHA!!"

      1. poorgradstudent

        I'll own up to it.

        At least the schism between American liberals isn't taking place in some kind of "meat world," although I have to admit I'd find it kind of funny if a loyal commenter over at Glenn Greenwald's suicide bombed Matthew Yglesias's place or vice versa. Maybe that's what Second Life is for?

    1. SorosBot

      Considering the spread of depression we've got coming up, soon all of America is gonna need AA; but won't turn to it because life will be too hard to face sober.

  2. user-of-owls

    officially makes “being poor” both Illegal and the legal status of 90% of Americans.

    So, now we have the New Apartheid, only with poverty now!

        1. V572 Hair of Destiny

          We should name them after the South African ones. Alabama can be Lebowa, Texas can be QwaQwa , Georgia can be Bophuthatswana , California should be KwaZulu, etc.

          1. user-of-owls

            We'll need to fiddle with the race designation on the passbooks too. Gone are the Xhosas, the Zulus and the 'Coloureds.'

            The new designations will be, "Poor Black," "Poor Anglo," "Poor Hispanic," etc. One other alteration will be the inclusion of a "Stupid" and "Vicious" designation in the form of Yes/No boxes.

            If the passbook holder has 'Yes' check on one or the other of these boxes, they will automatically be registered as a Republican. If the holder has 'Yes checks' on both boxes, by law they become Tea Party members.

      1. freakishlywrong

        At least get one of those fuckers in to his lame ass administration. Actually, from all I've seen and read, Krugman loathes Obama.

    1. powersuit

      No, he would rather stoke his beard and complain about whoever does run, then complain again when they don't heed his advice or return his calls.

      1. Nothingisamiss

        He doesn't have the executive experience of Sarah Palin, I'll tell you that right now.

      2. V572 Hair of Destiny

        That's so they can have Adult Conversations® about serious issues, like the one we just witnessed.

    2. spinozasgod

      according to BillO and the eyeof Newt, Obama has been doing everything Krugman has told him to do, so that proves that krugman and his liberal macroeconomics doesn't work!!! wow it is just as if they were playing opposite day.

  3. nounverb911

    "Ronald Reagan’s illegitimate son Barack Obama just signed his Tea Party Disaster Bill"
    I thought Grover Nordquist was Reagan's bastard son. There's more than one?

    1. mourningnmerica

      Barry isn't Reagan's son. But he is Blankfein's boy.

      Please join me in my new ABBA campaign (Anybody But Barry Again).

      Our President is a punk. And I do mean that in the prison vernacular.

  4. savethispatient

    I think the problem is that, as a Constitutional Law professor and a former Senator, Obama understands that the role of President is limited. This means he actually respects the will of the Congress.

    Of course, the Congress are a bunch of children, so the will of the Congress is "lets eat the paste and scribble on the walls with crayon".

    1. genxr

      "You say you want ice cream for dinner? But today's stimulus snack was 50% ice cream! I even removed the vegetables as a compromise! Well I can see I'm outvoted. Let's see if we can find a way to eat nothing but ice cream and maintain our health. Grover, stop pouring corn syrup on your ice cream! What? You've all signed a pledge to eat ice cream with corn syrup topping?"

      1. guangho

        "We're fat and dying of heart attacks and strokes and type II diabetes. This is obviously a dastardly Muslim plot by Black Daddy! Daddy, why didn't you tell us that ice cream will kill us? Why do you hate us Daddy?"

        1. genxr

          It wasn't the ice cream, you RINO! It was that carrot that we almost had to eat but we threatened to burn the house down so we got more ice cream instead. Liberals and their carrots are what ruined my health!

      1. savethispatient

        Does that mean they get to bring in games to play today? Which Senator is bringing in Kerplunk?

      2. OneDollarJuana

        (Congressman to pilot) "Say, are those landing lights? There sure are a lot of them!

        (Pilot to Congressman) "I don't think so, they're kind of filling the runway. Wait, they're torches. And pitchforks!"

    2. weejee

      Following the new Strunk and Wonkette guidelines:

      And those weaselfucking Congressional weaselfucks are so fucking proud of themselves for having weaselfucked the entire country.

    3. pdiddycornchips

      Well that makes me feel so much better. The Constitutional Law professor just made the dismantling of the social safety net along with the continuation of tax cuts for billionaires a bipartisan construction. He had to do this because opposing policies advocated by wingnuts in the House and Senate would be unconstitutional?

      1. guangho

        Um no, he had to do this because…well…you know how Nelson always beats up Milhouse? Well, maybe they could be friends. Owww!

      2. riverside68

        He had to do it because GoldSacks & Kocks created a monster that almost ate wall street.

        But it didn't, so hopey will be able to give GS & K $$$ to General Electric for tv spots.

        Feel better?

      3. Chet Kincaid

        Explain to me exactly how Obama dismantled the social safety net. I'm just trying to understand how you think. Oh, and provide some reputable sources.

        1. pdiddycornchips

          No addtional revenues, immediate cuts in domestic spending, a proposed raising of the eligibility age for medicare, putting Social Security on the table.

          Copy, paste, google.

          What I said is he is making the dismantling of the social safety net bipartisan. That and tax cuts for ever and ever. I don't know about you but I was paying attention a few years ago when Obama promised to let the Bush tax cuts expire for top income earners. He couldn't even get tax breaks for private jet owners eliminated. Before Obama, it was often said that social security was the third rail of politics. That's no longer the case.
          Now, the third rail appears to be tax cuts for billionaires.

          This is what dominates the debate in Washington. Not 9% unemployment, non-existent growth, an expanding gap between the haves and have nots.

          That we're going to balance the budget on the backs of the poor and middle class is obvious. It's what Republicans have long advocated. It took a Democratic president to turn their hopes and dreams into reality.

  5. Come here a minute

    The only thing we have to fear is Fear itself.

    Unfortunately, we've got a president who's chock-full of it.

  6. WhatTheHolyHeck

    It's Debt Ceiling Reconciliation Plan Mad Libs time!

    President ______ gave a ________ speech in _________ to _______ himself for the ________ job he did in ________ing the country while _________ing his values.

    1. baconzgood

      President _fart_ gave a _poopie___ speech in _penis____ to _butt__ himself for the _pee-pee___ job he did in ___fart__ing the country while ___boob__ing his values.

  7. nounverb911

    When are the Democrats going to get some balls and toss the teabaggers out of the party?

    1. Atlas Frooged

      A couple of good Dem lines from good ol' Will Rogers, young 'uns!

      I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.

      Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.

      1. OneDollarJuana

        The sad truth is that Dems have stood firm for values that aid people, hence Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, unemployment insurance, civil rights reforms, etc., etc,. But the last 40 years, since the Nixon era (ironically), there has been this sea change to the Right. And Down.

        Maybe BHO is playing nth-dimensional chess, with the expected outcome the total devastation of the economy, and the infinitesimal possibility that the dire situation will knock some sense into a majority of the population and some good politicians will be elected who aren't so craven and selfish.

    1. mourningnmerica

      I hate to say it, but Glenn Beck was right about gold. We should all try to get us some before it goes to 5 grand.

  8. Ducksworthy

    Fidelity sent me a newsletter explaining how the market would take off after the debt vote.

  9. user-of-owls

    “At least Obama is better than _____” and fill in whatever Republican bogeyman.

    "All" would seem apt.

  10. SayItWithWookies

    As soon as the ideal presidential candidate runs, I'll vote for him/her. Given that elections usually come down to two people and their respective qualifications, I'd prefer not to sit on my hands and cede control to the folks who have shown they'll make Scott Walker look like a hippie if they get the chance.

    1. pdiddycornchips

      Got it. If you think Hopey has underperformed, suck it. You have no place else to go.

      1. SayItWithWookies

        You can always vote for Nader. I'm sure that'll work out one of these days. But I'll bite — what do you suggest?

        1. pdiddycornchips

          I suggest disengagement. Think local. Vote and invest time where it can make a difference. Our overlords will get along just fine without the 5% of the population still capable of thinking for themselves.

      2. mourningnmerica

        Not true. Based on his appalling performance liberals would be much much better off with Romney and a Dem congress. Think I'm kidding? If America votes for Mittens, they will certainly balance him out by electing a Dem majority. We would be much better off. Nancy Pelosi is not a coward. This insane legislation would not pass with her in charge of the House.
        I despise Mittens as much as the next guy, but Hopey is an unmitigated disaster. He is so gutless that is is difficult to find the words to describe him. He gave them every last motherfucking thing they wanted. It's as if he were leader of the Tea Party. Those of you still supporting him because you like him so much need to take a good, long hard look at your thinking. The guy is harming the nation. He needs to go.
        P.S. I'm glad the downfisty button is gone. I suspect I would have taken a big negative on this post.

          1. DarwinianDemon

            Don't argue with facts, Chet.

            Remember the Dem Majority elected by the people in 2000 to balance out Bush? No?

            Well I am very angry that this new legislation has an amendment for Cut and Cap like the Teabaggers (And BFF Mitt Romney) wanted and cuts SS and Medicare. What? It doesn't?

            Huh…

            Well…..GARBLE GARBLE GARBLE!

          2. imissopus

            Also the Balanced Budget Amendment the Tea Party demanded Boehner throw in before they would vote for it. What about THAT?

            Wait, what? Okay, well, at least they have to vote on it again sometime early next year, giving themselves an issue with which to demagogue during the elections! Oh, that requirement is gone too?

            But Hopey sold us out! Throw me a frickin' bone here!

      1. V572 Hair of Destiny

        Doesn't every election come down to that?

        No wait, I remember one that didn't…seems like it was about three years ago. How were we to know that Hopey would turn out to be Bush in minstrel paint? "Yassuh, Mistuh Koch, we be doin what you be wantin!"

        But seriously, he's going to kill the "Bush" tax cuts next time. No kidding, he's serious!

          1. DarwinianDemon

            Progressives can't be racist, silly. They can make as many "lawn jockey" jokes as they want. Ask Ralph Nader.

        1. OneDollarJuana

          I voted for Obama fully aware that he was a middle-of-the-roader, but I felt that he would sign any good legislation that Congress sent him. I had no idea that he would scuttle good legislation before it even got to Congress. How can the Dems fight if he take their bullets as the battle begins?

          1. Chet Kincaid

            He doesn't "take their bullets," he counts the votes ahead of time with the realization that there are no longer any moderate Republicans he can peel off on the other side.

            In answer to your question, elect more Democrats.

          2. pdiddycornchips

            I thought we elected a leader, not a clerk. counting votes is nice, leading the party in the direction you want them to go, even better

          3. pdiddycornchips

            Sir, no offense but maybe you need a little history lesson. Obama was elected with large Democratic majorities in both houses. What did we get? Bush tax cut extensions, a HCR bill that includes no public option and an individual mandate (the very things Obama said made his plan superior to Hilz). An expansion of domestic spying, a continuation of the Bush policies on everything from Gitmo to the Fed. Electing Democrats to Congress is no substitute for presidential leadership.

          4. Swampgas_Man

            Hey, I voted for the "Middle of the Roader" because the alternative was "the Old Guy in the Gutter". The Pure is the enemy of the Pretty Good.

    2. imissopus

      It is a little nuts that people sat out the election last fall in protest of Obama not being liberal enough, which let a bunch of truly right-wing morons waltz in and take control of the House of Reps, thus making Obama's job that much harder, and now some of these same people are screaming that he still isn't pulling magic unicorns out of his ass. It's like chopping off Carl Lewis's right leg and then wondering why he's getting slower times in the 100-m dash.

      1. mourningnmerica

        No, it's not. You are absolutely wrong. He could have stood up to these misogynist racists and stopped them. Beaten them. Just as Clinton did.
        No, the problem is him. He is a coward. Why can't you see this? Shit, I was his biggest fan. No one was happier than me when he got elected. But you need to take your fucking rose colored glasses off. Get your head out of your ass and look at how he has behaved, what he has done. Stop being intellectually lazy. Wake the fuck up. We need better.

        1. imissopus

          He could have stood up to these misogynist racists and stopped them. Beaten them.

          And you have evidence to support your thesis? Wishful thinking doesn't make it true.

          My opinion is that we are at the point where the "Obama sold us out!" meme has so taken hold that anything that even hints of compromise with the GOP turns people into frothing rage machines. But then, I obviously have my head up my ass.

          1. TheSheriffsNear

            See! He can make shit happen! Okay, I'm back on board. Until I feel cranky and decide to project my own feelings of powerlessness onto him again.

          2. KenLayIsAlive

            I was born with a good Italian rage machine. And it is getting frothy over here.

            I do respect your outlook and I'm glad people can still see through to defend Obama, because we did, after all, elect him and should stand behind him, but come on.

            How can you not be disappointed Chet? I mean, at what point do you say "this shit is really getting bad." We were riding high and now look at us. Who do you blame for this outcome? When big business GOP repeatedly wins these victories (tea party won't ever win shit of course, they are just the pathetic disgusting pawns) are you just going to blame people for not sticking with Obama enough, or are you going to blame him for not leading the fight against them?

          3. fuflans

            you're making me feel a hell of lot better.

            i was so pissed at commentary last night i spilled wine all over my porch.

          4. imissopus

            Well, the media loves to flog the "Has Obama lost the left" meme. Gives 'em a "Can he be the comeback kid" storyline to write for the next fifteen months.

            Plus our politics have become so much about immediate victory that people only see it in terms of what "we" won and "they" lost, or vice versa. So they hear "Medicare cuts" or "no tax increases" and start screaming. It happened after the budget deal a few months ago, then a few days after it was signed we found out the cuts the Repubs had been touting were bullshit, that Obama had basically rolled Boehner. Which is why I don't understand why people are so ready – almost anxious – to reach for the pitchforks and torches. Give it a few days for people to pore over the details and then see how this deal looks.

          5. KenLayIsAlive

            Come on, "hints" of compromise?

            Now, there's been a little more than just "hints" of compromise, wouldn't you say?

            This doesn't particularly have do do exactly with anything you've said, this just seems like a good place to drop it. And god knows I've bothered Chet enough.

            This whole thing with people not voting. Barack Obama needs to do things to rally his base. He doesn't do them. In fact, when he gets the chance, he insults his base. Politicians are supposed to kiss babies and make people feel important, not say they need to be "drug tested" and call them "unrealistic" when he drops the ball on things.

            Not make a deal that flies in the face of everything his base believes in and then say "This is a great deal for the American People". The what? Is there a fucking "American People" anymore? Far as I can see, there is just the haves and have nots. "American People" my ass. Good deal for some, bad deal for others. The President needs to figure out whose side he is on and forget about this "American People" nonsense. Play to the base, make people feel important, make people feel empowered. Tell them the fucking truth from their perspective. That's what gets votes. Not aloof above-it-all-ness.

            If he didn't want to be a fucking politician, he should have stayed out of politics.

    1. pinkocommi

      That's no way to refer to China. Or, I should write, 中國. It is best to learn the language of our overlords.

  11. PalinPussyPower

    I should have listened to my Uncle Jebediah. This is what happens when you put black people in charge.

    1. scionkirk

      Well, Obama is half white, so it could just be a continuation of the previous 'winning streak'

      1. GhostBuggy

        Ha ha, coffins! Remember you typed that when they're tossing our naked corpses into pauper's graves.

    1. DaRooster

      Might as well just use the pitchforks to toss the monies onto the torches… at least we'll stay warm this winter.

  12. scionkirk

    But if he actually used government to do things, Tea Baggers might be even meaner to him. They can say some pretty hurtful things, you know.

    1. Terry

      They'll also "primary" the few moderate Republicans left or any of the conservatives who even talk to him.

    1. comrad_darkness

      We may be down to the 0.5% now. Can't support THAT many non-productive extremely high-maintenance citizens you know.

  13. missemish

    I can always count on Wonkette to cheer me up about the state of our country. If you'll excuse me, I'm out of gin.

      1. freakishlywrong

        We'll be drinking all those old drinks that Mr. Burns drinks like "sidecars" and "lime rickeys".

        1. MLHencken

          Ooh, I like a good sidecar.

          You know, many of those prohibition era cocktails used those exotic recipes to kill the taste of shitty homemade or/or watered down booze.

          I am a booze snob/nerd. Apologies.

  14. MLHencken

    Wait, weren't we told this wouldn't happen as long as we went along with whatever the GOP wanted to do? That's compromise, right?

    Happy "We avoided default, but not consequence" Day everyone.

  15. Ducksworthy

    I suspect this has to do with institutional investors realizing that a minority party of lunatics is now dictating economic policy.

    1. poorgradstudent

      And more and more of the rest of the world is like, "Step away from the wheel of the global economy slowly."

        1. V572 Hair of Destiny

          Obama could still change his mind. Nobody knew LBJ would quit until he announced it after the Tet offensive.

          1. guangho

            LBJ., monumental fuckup though he was in Vietnam, did something for the other 99% of the country as well. BHO couldn't lick LBJ's shoes.

          2. V572 Hair of Destiny

            We could have a boring discussion of that. The only Great Society program that survived was Head Start. But Medicare was huge, larger than anyone could’ve imagined before cat scans, bypass operations, heart transplants, etc.So you are correct.

          3. SorosBot

            And, you know, the little matters of the Civil Rights and Voting Rights Acts. That's the thing about LBJ; if you ignore Vietnam, he doesn't just become a good President, he becomes a great one.

          4. V572 Hair of Destiny

            Right again. Those were huge, contentious events, bitterly opposed by the granddaddies of the assholes who are ruining everything now. I was in the Senate gallery the day the Voting Rights Act of 1965 passed, and my history teacher (who’d orchestrated our trip to DC) said, “This is an historic day you’ll always remember.” I guess he was wrong, since I forgot.

          5. mourningnmerica

            The Tea offensive has already happened. Hopey, please take a cue from Sarah, and quit.

    1. GOPCrusher

      If there is one good thing to come of this fiasco, it will be to hear the harpies like Palin and Bachmann shrieking about how the debt ceiling got raised.

  16. loulouroo

    So, this is our socialist president's plan to make the investor class hurt after all. Take THAT Grover Norquist!

  17. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    There was no Stock Market when the Founders first decreed there should be no taxes on anyone, so the 'Baggers will not care about this.

    1. missemish

      yeah, my procrastination over getting money invested is starting to look like sound business sense

    2. Boredw/Gravitas

      Look at you, all stuck up with fancy jars for your coins. An Altoids box is plenty big for the few nickels I have left.

  18. cheetojeebus

    the plutocarts will be polishing their Faberges right about now. Which is translated into poorspeak as; " rubbin' one out. "

  19. smitallica

    Huh. If only some economists had warned us that cutting spending during a recession was a dumbfuck thing to do.

  20. owhatever

    The rule is to buy stocks when there is blood running in the streets. But who are the only ones with the cash to load up on Acme Inc.? The rich, and one stupid coyote. See how it works?

  21. Goonemeritus

    Ok I’m starting to sense a inkling of disappointment in Obama surfacing on this site. Well I know we have been snarking our asses off here so none of this could be our fault. Maybe if the other fifty precent of the progressive media can join the half that is already vowing to sit the next election out?

    1. FNMA

      President Bachmann?
      I hear Costa Rica's nice. And it's far enough away that the smoke shouldn't be too bad.

  22. littlebigdaddy

    So whatsay the Wonkette community all chips in to buy BO a case of hobo beans for his birfday tomorrow. Maybe we can hire Orly Taitz to sing "Happy Birthday Mr. President."

  23. x111e7thst

    Didn't we try this balance the budget bullshit during the last Great Depression? I wonder how that worked out?

    1. BarackMyWorld

      I have it on good authority that it was too much government regulation and spending that caused the depression 4 years after it started and kept it going until the free market policies single-handedly won World War II.

    2. Nothingisamiss

      If only there were people who studied this stuff, and people who listened to those mythic beasts. Seems hard, though. Hey, have you seen the new episode of "Jersey Shore?"

  24. DaRooster

    "So when you go to sleep tonight with the Fear gnawing at your belly…"

    Sleep? Not possible… FUCK YOU ASS-CLOWNS!

    1. Limeylizzie

      Sometimes I go to sleep with MrLimeyLizzie gnawing at my belly, so I tell him to put his glasses on.

    1. DaRooster

      "U.S. authorities have recovered nearly 30,000 15,000 pounds of cocaine worth an estimated $360 million $180 million from a sunken submarine-like vessel used by smugglers off the coast of Honduras, the Coast Guard said on Monday."

      I shoulda joined the Coast Guard…

      1. Steverino247

        Being over six feet tall, I was heavily recruited to join.

        (For those who don't know the joke, you have to be over six feet tall to join the Coast Guard. That way, if the boat sinks you can wade ashore.)

        1. DaRooster

          Kinda like you have to be under 5'6" to be a California Highway Patrol officer… I guess so you will have a Napoleon Complex and be a Dick-Head.

  25. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    Hoping the 'Baggers will admit they have no idea what they are doing is like waiting for the Conservative movement to admit they have failed at everything they have tried over the last 30 years (other than to destroy government and to fuck over the poor. . . they have been very good at that). Since 1980, we have seen the tax system totally changed in favor of the rich, education redone in a conservative mode, the rise of FOX News and Conservative media, Republican control of much of government and most of the courts, and Conservative/Neocon dominated firing policy. And, in those thirty-years, all the Republicans can show for it is that they are at least partially on their way to achieving Ronald Reagan's dream of making this country what it once was, and arctic landscape covered in ice.

    1. DaRooster

      Yeah, but don't forget all the jobs… I for one have never seen so many "Help Wanted" signs and such a thriving economy… that part is just friggin' AWESOME.

    2. pdiddycornchips

      Ummm, I must disagree. If you're a billionaire, this place is like heaven on acid.

    3. TheSheriffsNear

      You forgot to hat tip Steve Martin for that last line. I remember when he did that bit live on SNL in the 80's. (Where's my geritol?)

    1. BaldarTFlagass

      Mighty optimistic there, assuming there's going to enough of a civilization left to hold elections.

    2. GunToting[Redacted]

      I've been to Centreville, VA (ZIP 20120). I don't think there are any polling places (too urban).

    3. lowaltflier

      2012 Dam!

      You people are great. That’s why I love this site.

      Seriously until we brake the assumption that if you don’t vote for one of the two main parities you are throwing your vote away. Nothing will change.
      I for one feel if I vote for the person who best represents me is not throwing my vote away.
      I never voted for Clinton or Gore. Then I voted for Kerry because I couldn’t stand having Bush for 4 more years. You all know what happened.
      And Obama comes with all his hope and change and he seem like a true progressive.
      Then he put up the white flag and surrenders.

      So yeah. I’ll be voting Green in 2012.

    4. DarwinianDemon

      Whenever the thought of voting Green Party strikes me I ask myself "Would we be here right now if Gore had clobbered Bush in 2000 so that it couldn't be stolen?"

  26. VeraSevera

    Obama, in an act of pure hubris (who needs a party or a Congress or a legislative process when you have my negotiating superpowers), has helped usher in a new regime; he has effectively Californicated the Federal government–gridlock, minority rule, supermajority democracy, permanent fiscal crisis, and perennial budget battles. Welcome to the future of government in America….So what will save us from another four years of Barack "Everything's on the Table" Obama? Repeat after me: RUN HILLARY RUN!

    1. mourningnmerica

      I want Hillz too. SHE WOULD NOT TAKE ANY FUCKING SHIT FROM THAT FUCKING DWARF, JOHN BOEHNER.

  27. cheetojeebus

    Gandhi will be on the cover of Vogue soon and 'poverty chic' will rule the racks down at the now empty mall. So, for once I'm ahead of the fashion curve.

    1. mourningnmerica

      Good post, plus you have one of my top five favorite names. You are still behind Writey Writerton, in my book.

  28. donner_froh

    The reversal of consumer spending probably has a lot more to do with the market dropping than the debt ceiling bill which has been part of the equation for at least a couple of days.

    1. DarwinianDemon

      Boooo…

      This was the best screed since we learned Osama bin Laden was just a rag tag rebel leading freedom fighters against evil Americans. How dare you ruin it.

    2. OneDollarJuana

      Exactly. And what does this legislation portend for the jobs picture? Hence the stock market dropoff. Too bad the people with the money are so greedy and nearsighted that they can't realize that if they push some it to the 99.5% things will get much better.

      And they'll still be fucking rich.

      1. comrad_darkness

        I've been kicking this around in my head lately. When we taxed CEOs at 50% (you know, the Reagan era) they said, hell, rather than take more salary and turn it over to uncle sam, I'll just pour it back into the company, that will show them. Hence CEO salaries were 50 times the average worker. Fast forward to 35% rates and a pile of fake life insurance loopholes that let companies quadruple compensation, untaxed and suddenly the ratio is 300x. Because it's all gravy. Why not pocket it all? But what that means is they have sucked up waaaay too many resources from the company. 250 employees worth. That's job destruction of the first order. No way anyone, capitalist or marxist, is going to successfully argue that company would not be better off with 250 more employees rather than one overfattened CEO.

  29. randcoolcatdaddy

    Oh please, let's dismantle Social Security so we can invest for our retirement in something really stable in the financial market – the lottery.

  30. genxr

    See? if only we'd made even deeper cuts, eliminated the EPA, FDA, DOE, and passed a balanced budget amendment, none of this would have happened!

    1. mourningnmerica

      We don't need no welfare state
      Hobo beans is what we'll eat
      We are meeting up with fate
      So… blame the gheyyyyyys.

    1. V572 Hair of Destiny

      If Lieberman isn't among the 12 disciples of the Super Congress, then there is no Yahweh. Pork-ertunities like this don't come along every day.

  31. MozakiBlocks

    Dangnabbit Barry, I've defended you against all comers throughout the past 2 1/2 years of rampant fucknuttery, but this is just too much.

    <heavy sigh>

  32. BlueStateLibel

    Obama attacking his supporters will definitely ensure that he gets reelected.

    How many times do we have to tell him that no matter how much he appeases the teatards, they will still think he's a communist-Kenyan-muslim-socialist and worse. Maybe his base should start calling him bad names so he won't hate them?

  33. donner_froh

    FDR:

    I should like to have it said of my first Administration that in it the forces of selfishness and of lust for power met their match. I should like to have it said of my second Administration that in it these forces met their master.

    Works for me.

    1. FNMA

      “We had to struggle with the old enemies of peace — business and financial monopoly, speculation, reckless banking, class antagonism, sectionalism, war profiteering. … Never before in all our history have these forces been so united against one candidate as they stand today. They are unanimous in their hate for me — and I welcome their hatred.”

      1. DarwinianDemon

        You know, this deal pisses me off. But my understanding is that (at least) the cuts exclude SS, Medicare and Pell. In addition, maybe things like…no copays for abortion snacks (aka birth control) don't mean much to some people, but…they kinda mean a lot ot me?

        1. imissopus

          That didn't have anything to do with the debt deal, but I figured that requiring insurance companies to cover birth control and other women's health services without charging co-pays was a pretty big fucking deal, especially considering how badly the Tea Party still wants to kill the AFA and how much progressive whining there has long been about healthcare reform being nothing but a sell-out to insurance companies.

          But that was on Monday. What has Obama done for us today?

          1. DarwinianDemon

            I know it didn't have anything to do with the debt deal. the debt deal is a flippin' disaster. But it should fly into the face of people who say we should have MITT ROMNEY as president (like…someone actually right here on Wonkette).

          2. mourningnmerica

            Darwin, Come on, don't misrepresent what I said. I am as credentialed a lefty as anyone on this site. What I said was that we would be better of with Mittens and a Dem congress. Did you miss that part? And the part about my despising Romney?

            I believe that it would be very, very difficult to deny the fact that the legislation coming out of this country right now is further to the right than it ever was under any Democratic President. Do you disagree? Hopey has totally folded in the face of the bullying of the lunatic right. Honestly, do you disagree? That Bill is a Tea Party Bill. They are calling the tune. It didn't have to be like this. Mitt Romney / Nancy Pelosi would result in a much less extreme right wing legislating congress than we have now. Would you disagree?

            Do you disagree that a Dem controlled House would have never, ever, have let a bill like this see the light of day? It seems to me that this point is not even debatable.

            I suggested that the laws being passed would be more just, more centrist, if Mittens were President with a Dem congress. I think that this is not only true, but sort of obvious. Maybe you don't agree.

            My beef with you and Chet and others is that it seems to me that there is perhaps nothing Obama could do wrong that would cause you to stop supporting him. I see what I consider to be blind support for him, and it does bother me. It seems intellectually lazy to me. Maybe I'm wrong.

            Being as objective as I can be, based on his actions thus far, I honestly believe that he no longer deserves any support from the left, or anyone of good conscience. From the strengthening of the Patriot act, to the kowtowing to Goldman Sachs, to extending the Bush tax cuts, he has behaved like a Republican stooge. I find it hard to believe or accept that these things would not provoke anger and a sense of betrayal in progressives like yourself. And I believe that some of us are only observing what is going on around us, politically, very casually. Hence, the "get your head out of your ass" and "rose colored glasses" comments.

            So if you still support Hopey, that's your right. But progressives don't have to so gladly support this kind of failure.

            And yes, Pelosi / Mittens is clearly better than Boehner / Hopey.

          3. Chet Kincaid

            Where do you get this fantasy that if the American people vote for Mittens they will automatically also "vote for Pelosi?" It is nonsensical. People don't go into the booth and declare that they will vote for their Senator or their Representative deliberately to balance their choice for President. My objective opinion, sorry, is that your whole Mittens/Dem Congress thing isn't even a good speculative-fiction comment-thread timewaster.

          4. mourningnmerica

            Chet, I don't know what fantasy you are talking about. I think that it is fairly likely, not automatic, that if Mittens becomes President, he will do so with a Democratic House. I see a Republican President and Republican House as very unlikely. In most years, in recent history, there have been opposing parties in power,. 10 of the last 15 House terms have had one party in the Whitehouse and the other in the House. It has been suggested that the American public felt safer with one party not able to control everything. I don't know if that is true or not. But if Mittens is elected, and in view of the shit the Republicans have pushed through, I think it is very likely Dems take the House in 2012. Not a fantasy, I;m not sure it will happen and I never said that it was a certainty. Capiche?

            For hopefully the final time, I believe we are better off with Romney / Pelosi than this Boehner / Obama pairing, if that happens.

            If you want to critique, please critique what I have said, not a misunderstanding of it.

          5. Chet Kincaid

            I don't think it's as simple as just looking at the last 15 house terms and making a prediction. Since the 1960s, we've seen a gigantic realignment of what it means to be a Democrat or a Republican. As you should well know, today's Southern (and in some cases, Northern) Republican is last century's Southern Democrat. You can't look at the composition of the Congress without looking at those major historical shifts. There are also factors involving personality and the advantage of incumbency that are a lot more important for Congressional races than "I'm gonna vote for this guy because I don't trust the other guy I went ahead and voted for anyway." I mean come on, have you ever met anyone who actually said they voted that way?

            But sure, OK, I will concede that you believe your Romney/Pelosi "Dream Government" would be heaven on earth.

          6. mourningnmerica

            Dimwit, OK, don't deal with the substance of what I said. That last sentence of yours. Why do you have to argue like such a little bitch? You have to make stuff up to argue your side?

            I tried to make what I thought was a reasoned point about Obama's weakness hurting the country. I took a good deal of space trying to justify what had brought me to this conclusion. Then look at you. Dream Government. Jesus.

          7. DarwinianDemon

            What makes you believe that people who vote against Dems will magically vote for Dems for congress? What do you have to back up that assumption.

            Pass. I'll try for a Dem congress and a Dem president doing things like ending DADT and protecting SS.

      1. genxr

        yes, life will pound you down, stomp on you, beat you up, and nuance the crap out of you. Then life will sit back, point at your bloody face and laugh.

    1. pdiddycornchips

      Speaking only for myself, why bother participating at all? If the last four years have taught us anything, it's this. When you strip away all the pretty pictures and soaring rhetoric, it doesn't make any difference who wins. The policy outcomes are identical whether it 's Obama or Mittens or Bachmann. No matter who wins, we will continue headlong down the path. Our corporatist elites are hellbent on making our country a nation of serfs and overlords.

      1. Cicada

        I agree, you really should sit this one out. It isn't disenfranchisement if you do it to yourself!

    2. mourningnmerica

      Boehner and Obama vs. Pelosi and Romney. Tell me, with a straight face, that the legislation coming out of the latter would be as rabidly right wing and pro wealthy and pro corporation as it is now. Go ahead, I dare you. I didn't think so.

      But the point is, we should not take these kind of failures and betrayals from Hopey, AND CONTINUE WITH THE CHEERLEADING FOR HIM.

      1. Cicada

        Yes, that's precisely my point. MINDLESS CHEERLEADING FOR ALL, INDEPENDENT THOUGHT FOR NONE!

        Well parsed, genius.

    1. GOPCrusher

      Perhaps.
      But I think it would not be too much of a stretch to say that Obama would win in a contest against David Duke.

  34. proudgrampa

    Hmmm. Yeah, I'm pissed off, too. But the market is reacting to much more than the debt thingy.

    For what it's worth, Obama is in way over his head: there are market and political forces way beyond his (or anyone's) ability to understand, let alone control.

    My recommendation: continue to stock up on gold, silver, and toilet paper.

    1. GOPCrusher

      What's not to understand? Companies are awash with cash. We have the Legislative and Judicial branches that are firmly in the pocket of Big Business.
      Yet the economy creeps along at 2% growth with over 9% unemployment despite the fact that over 800 billion dollars was thrown at it.
      Anyone that still believes that we are not in a full blown class war, must own a unicorn.

      1. Cicada

        What's to understand is that this is a global economic crisis, and while our domestic policies do have some effect they are not the defining factor driving fluctuations in the the global economy.

        The disparity between wealthy and poor in this country, OTOH, is definitely related to domestic policy. The stock market tumble, not so much.

        ETA: Here's a nice piece on the economic shitstorm that's happening in Europe, for example: http://www.economist.com/blogs/schumpeter/2011/07

    2. Atlas Frooged

      By that token (no pun) what's BO got to lose by showing some spine or calling bullshit on conservatives. His best guess can't be any worse than quadrupling down on trickle-down-Norquist economics. The same cheats who caused the economic problem, and then benefited from the bailout of same, came up with some master plan that they pulled out of their ass a few weeks ago and wondered if they could shoehorn in place of a standard debt ceiling vote. At this rate he's out of options and rapidly jeopardizing any chance of reelection.

  35. Duly_Noted

    So we're putting off the inevitable victory of progressivism over conservatism for a few more days?

  36. hagajim

    You know, I thought li'l Barry was a scholar and shit….I guess he was a token placement in college because almost ANYONE who has ever read even a little bit of American history knows that this same shit happened during the Depression. We were just coming out of our funk and the Republicans stomped on government spending – sending us back into a fucking Depression which we then needed a WAR to get out of. Who is for invading any country right now – oh wait, I forgot we're already in two of them and it makes no fucking difference!

    1. GunToting[Redacted]

      The problem here is that our wars don't generate the same GDP gains that WWII did. You know what this means? China, we're coming for you!

    2. Cicada

      Can you fucking criticize the guy without going to the racist as fuck "token" well?

      For fuck's sake, people. I know for a fact that people were able to criticize W here without calling him a honky every two minutes. There was another comment on this post where someone complained about Obots calling them racist. Later on I see a comment about Obama being in blackface and saying yessuh. Now this token crap.

      STOP IT, YOU FUCKING CRACKERS.*

      *Ironic, because I am a lily-white honky cunt.

      1. hagajim

        My apologies – the li'l part is actually related to the fact that the man has NO balls and he will be li'l Barry until he grows a pair. The token part was a bit racist – though not intentioned to be that way, besides sometimes ya gotta snark on this crap.

  37. johnnyzhivago

    I'm running for president. My platform is to raid Goldman Sachs, execute their management and steal their money. Then use all of it to build the Space Elevator so we can get off of this fucking nightmare of a planet.

    1. BaldarTFlagass

      You have some interesting ideas. Do you have a newsletter to which I could subscribe?

  38. glamourdammerung

    I sometimes wonder if the conservative hatred towards France is due to the French had a much more…interesting way of dealing with the ultra-wealthy trying to run society on the backs of everyone else.

  39. alaninthecastro

    I think it's official now: Barack Obama, second-worst President of the 21st century.

  40. JustPixelz

    At least we finally know how well Repubican/Tea Party economic ideas are liked by the markets out here in the real world. OH WAIT! We already learned that while Shrubby was in charge.

  41. Uniprober

    "two zero-sum opponents pitting all of the country’s old people against all of its bombs and its torture dungeons" I smell an awesome pay per view event…

  42. VeraSevera

    The silver lining is supposed to be the giant cuts to defense that are part of this deal and that will be triggered automatically if the Dirty Dozen Committee ends in deadlock. Ha-ha, in your dreams. I smell another war on its way.

  43. Quayle2012_KNOT

    Any three year period that makes me pine for 1967-1970 should be banned by the Geneva Convention. A Nation waits for a glimmer of hope from Wisconsin. Show us a sign!

  44. mumbly_joe

    So, everybody saying, "yeah, vote 3rd party/anybody but Obama/primary Obama":

    Way to take exactly the WRONG lesson from the teabagpocalypse of 2010. Has anyone actually looked at the far-right third parties lately? One of the reasons the teabaggers surged was that they managed to poach the far-right, lunatic, white supremacist nutjobs from the cult of Ron Paul and from the Constitution party, and got them to vote as a block in the Republican party. They co-opted the extreme far-right and merged them into their own, already-lunatic base.

    You want reliably liberal Democrats in office? Vote on issues with your pocket book and in primaries. Most politicians are feckless and will think what the money tells them to, and primaries are for filtering out the unpalatable ideologues. BUT STILL VOTE FOR DEMOCRATS IN GENERALS. With very, very few exceptions, a vote for a third party is a vote against the guy you would have picked if there were only two choices. Because ultimately, in American politics, there really only are.

  45. SenileAgitation

    First they came for the tax increases for the wealthiest and I said nothing, because I'm a dick that way. Then they came for the EPA/environment with sneaky riders to Interior funding bills and I said nothing because, well I just didn't, right? Then they came for my hobo beans and funding for roads and things and with a miracle invented anguish over the sky-is-falling debt ceiling and I thought the people I voted for who said they were for those things would vote for policies that I believe, but they all showed their weiners and nobody would take them seriously anymore… sorry, I'm very disheartened. If I thought there was any "live to fight another day" I'd feel better, but not convinced the President is much of a fighter so far.

  46. Chet Kincaid

    Dame Peggington Noonington welcomes all of you Hugely Disappointed Former Barryholics with open arms!
    http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424053111904

    Now, some people might wonder who benefits most from a consensus that Obama and the Democratic Party are no longer worth getting out of your goddamned beds and voting for, but that is beside the point. What's most important is withdrawing your support and disengaging as quickly as possible!

    1. mourningnmerica

      Chet, Blind Faith was my favorite band, but that was a long time ago. Get over him. It'll hurt for a while, but you can do it.

    2. poorgradstudent

      I can't speak for my fellow Firebaggers (oh well, it's still better than "Professional Left"), but I'll still be voting for Obama. A horrible economic policy and a decent if flawed social policy is still better than a horrible economic policy and a medieval social policy.

  47. Negropolis

    Kind of to go along with this Rick "Ricktator" Snyder here in Michigan signed a bill that will toss 12,600 here in the state off the welfare rolls in a few months. I hear the new welfare reform, here, is now one of the toughest in the region after having been one of the most generous in the entire nation, so this will be a huge shock to our local society.

    Perfect, we're throwing off tens of thousands of families off the rolls in a state with 10% unemployment. Hope they are ready for the influx of homelessness, something else they won't pay for.

  48. Negropolis

    You know, if Sarah was president, at least we could laugh hysterically as we descended into economic hellfire. At least it would make terrifying sense.

  49. VeraSevera

    It seems to me the job is nearly done now and what we're seeing is just the mopping up operations. The job: deregulate the economy and debilitate the democratic process. All that remains now is a turkey shoot on the remnants of the welfare state: the EPA, the unions, the teachers–BAM BAM BAM one by one they're falling by the wayside. Republicans no longer need to elect majorities or presidents to call the shots. Just have a united minority that says NO to everything and a government in constant near-default, and a permanent recession to make sure it stays that way. The next Republican president will take over a government so enfeebled s/he will be hard pressed to find new evils left to inflict upon us. That's why I wonder if it really matters whether Obama goes down in the next election or not. And then there's this: What IS his bottom line? What WON'T he put on the bargaining table? What leash can be put on him to keep him in line with the people? He seems constitutionally naive.

  50. SayItWithWookies

    What some folks don't grasp (and I'm not suggesting your comment was serious, but some like that are) is that politics is the art of ekeing out as much as you can while living with nearly constant disappointment. Whatever tide there is now is going to be pushed against a little bit later — and the only way to advance your cause is to have patience and push for the best available representation at the time.
    Did Obama screw up this deal? Well given what he had to work with, it's hard for me to see how it could've come out much better. The answer isn't to get disgusted with our side, but to keep pushing it in the direction we want to go.

  51. Limeylizzie

    Sometimes I do the sexy librarian thing, or the filthy whore and wear really bright red lipstick.

  52. SayItWithWookies

    Now those are the Democrats who need to be primaried — the blue dogs who are thoughtlessly beholden to corporate interests and retrograde values and who are still afraid to do anything that might be characterized as liberal.

  53. imissopus

    Maybe. I just seem to recall reading a fair amount of commentary from liberals who proudly sat out the election to send Obama a message that he had to be more responsive to his base or something. And after the election I seem to recall reading some gloating about how NOW Obama would have to pay more attention to the base and what it wanted.

    Some of us were saying that if we want more liberal policies we had to figure out how to elect a more liberal Congress. Instead we removed ourselves from the playing field.

  54. pdiddycornchips

    What's the difference? Other than Dems wouldn't have to share the blame for the eventual negative outcomes?

  55. Negropolis

    Good god, man. Who won't you vote for? You've got an excuse for every fucking thing. You'd defend Nazis if you thought you could get away with it.

  56. pdiddycornchips

    Obama could try leading. He could force a showdown on the Bush tax cuts for instance. What do you want to bet he doesn't.

    It comes down to this, do you support liberal/progressive policies or do you support the President. It's increasingly clear you can't do both.

Comments are closed.