Oh look, Washington’s McDebtpocalypsegeddon inferno dance party is finally winding down. Or is it? Can it actually be true? Here is Obama claiming that the fiesta keg is all but empty, and boy does he look tired/hungover/ like he made out with John Boehner a few more time than he wanted to. A deal! A debt deal has been reached. What sort of “party favors” will America take home from this particular congressional coke-n-hookers sleepover party binge?
Uh, let’s see, spending cuts of about $2.4 trillion and a coupon for a bag of fried donut holes, everyone! “The result would be the lowest level of annual domestic spending since Dwight Eisenhower was president,” Obama said. How about a return to Eisenhower-level taxes for the wealthy? No, the Democrats lost their balls and the Jell-O shots contest yet again. What else? Oh, America gets another bipartisan debt commission that everyone will ignore. Bad party favor, America gets one of those every year. Is there anything fun for the American people in the goody bag? No, just a little note that says, “the global economy will not collapse tomorrow, you’re welcome.”
Pending final passage, the agreement marked a dramatic reach across party lines that played out over six months and several rounds of negotiating, interspersed by periods of intense partisanship.
“Sometimes it seems our two sides disagree on almost everything,” Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said in floor remarks.
“But in the end, reasonable people were able to agree on this: The United States could not take the chance of defaulting on our debt, risking a United States financial collapse and a world-wide depression.”
Both Houses still have to vote on this, but as far as the markets are concerned, the Panic Is Over. Don’t forget to sign the guestbook on the way out, etc etc. [AP]
GIVE US MONEY! -