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we'll start with the old ladies.What is still the best way in 2011 to convince a room full of intransigent Republican males to join your team? You promise them a little violence and a little mayhem. House Majority Whip Kevin McCarthy sat down a group of GOP lawmakers to show them a scene from a Ben Affleck movie called The Town as a way to boost “togetherness” in the caucus during these eternal debt fights. The movie is about bank robbery, Ben Affleck is the bank robber, and the line McCarthy played for lawmakers goes like this: “I need your help. I can’t tell you what it is. You can never ask me about it later. And we’re going to hurt some people.” HURT! They know that word. Sweaty, excited faces all around! Where do they sign up for whatever John Boehner is asking them to vote for? How soon does the hurting start? Oh, and can we guess which Florida military nut congressman immediately changed his position on the debt ceiling after watching the clip?

Yes, of course it was Allen West. He even offered to drive the getaway car to Belize or wherever.

From WaPo:

House Majority Whip Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.), the party’s vote counter, began his talk by showing a clip from the movie, “The Town”, trying to forge a sense of unity among the independent-minded caucus.

One character asks his friend: “I need your help. I can’t tell you what it is. You can never ask me about it later.”

“Whose car are we gonna take,” the character says.

After showing the clip, Rep. Allen West (R-Fla.), one of the most outspoken critics of leadership among the 87 freshmen, stood up to speak, according to GOP aides.

“I’m ready to drive the car,” West replied, surprising many Republicans by giving his full -throated support for the plan.

AWESOME. Let’s get this show on the road, where do we start? Some brown kids? Old people? Women? COME ON. [WaPo via TPM]

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  • Barb

    They should watch "The Undefeated" together. It will scare the crap out of them and they will behave for a while.

  • PsycWench

    Fight Club" would be more realistic

  • LouBristol

    But the car, and Rep. Darrel Issa, were nowhere to be found.

    • bagofmice

      Protected by viper security.

    • riverside68

      It was his brother!

  • occams8ball

    If not for the greed, anger, bigotry, and violence, I could consider being a republican.

    • It would be a sweet life. I'm getting a stiffy just thinking of all the IOKIYAR things I could do.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Receptionist: How do you write Republicans so well?
      Melvin Udall: I think of a man, and I take away reason, accountability, personal responsibility, and reason.

      • tessiee

        As well as every last shred of compassion and empathy.

    • tessiee

      "If not for the greed, anger, bigotry, and violence"

      And don't forget the abject, pig-fucking STUPIDITY!

  • "I'm ready to drive the car over some widows and orphans."
    Allen West

    • LouBristol

      "… but tie them up first, so as to even the odds."

    • LabRodent

      Lets just hope its a Corvair or a Sporty Pinto.

    • riverside68

      Don't forget the uppity non-ladies!

    • MissTaken

      To be fair I'm sure some of those widows aren't acting very lady-like.

    • tessiee

      If this were spoken in the voice of ADAM West, it would actually be kinda funny.

  • WinterOuthouse

    I understand his enthusiasm. I'm always at my happiest when I get to foreclose on a family and throw them to the street. If I can bash their knees in when they're leaving, well, that is just a bonus

    • HELisforHEL

      All he needs is a Snidely Whiplash mustache to twirl menacingly.

  • Oblios_Cap

    So they really are a bunch of twelve year-olds!

    • PsycWench

      I'd dial down that age a little, since it seems to me that they could relate to Super Grover of Sesame Street. He always thinks he's saving the day but he actually makes everything worse.

    • GOPCrusher

      No. Most twelve year olds can see the difference between fiction and reality.
      These happy assholes honestly believe that they are patriots, fighting to take their country back.

  • cheetojeebus

    Oh, that's fukkin' heartening.
    They probably woulda rather watched Querelle for the umpteenth time.

    • Limeylizzie

      Bonus points for the Querelle mention!

  • The Road Warrior seems to be a more appropriate movie choice. A land with no fuel. Environment ruined. Sociopath white people driving around raping and pillaging. Plus cute guys in assless chaps.

    • Arken

      Would that make Boehner the Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah?

    • Arken

      I just realized that Boehner can't be The Great Humongous, because that's Chris Christie.

      • DashboardBuddha

        The Ayatollah of Assahola

        • genxr

          Is that Cantor on the back of his motorcycle? And where is the feral kid with the boomerang when we need him?

    • bagofmice

      I'm getting more of a "Book of Eli" vibe.

      • Yoohoo that movie starred one of those people.

      • vulpes82

        God, I hated that movie. Yes, the Bible, the absolute most-printed and widely available book ever, survives only in Denzel Washington's head. Sure!

        • BaldarTFlagass

          Really. All they had to do is go into any room and check the nightstand in any post-apocalyptic motel in post-apocalyptic America. Thanks, Gideons!

          • AJWjr.

            I think all they found in there was the Book of Mormon.

          • V572 Hair of Destiny

            Musta been a Marriott.

          • Gunner Asch

            Gideon checked out and left it no doubt
            To aid in good Rocky's revival

          • DashboardBuddha

            Have you ever seen a Gideon? Where are they from, Gidea?

        • horsedreamer_1

          False flag! Everybody knows Denzel is a Muslin.

        • fuflans

          i remember the new yorker review made some witty comment about mankind being so bad that we were punished with a brown movie.

    • PubOption

      How about 'Barb Wire', American society has collapsed, and people are trying to escape to Canada. It also has Pam Anderson's boobs as a bonus.

      • V572 Hair of Destiny

        It was her homage to "Casablanca," although few noticed, because of the awesome boobage.

  • How about "The Caine Mutiny? Boehner will have totally lost his ball bearings if he thinks he'll keep his tarded frosh in line on the debt vote at this time.

    • HarryButtle

      Boner as Old Yellowstain…I like it. And Cantor makes a very convincing Keefer.

  • Trannysurprise

    More like the Thelma and Louise trip over the cliff. Which I would support if they could get all the Republican douche nozzles in the back seat.

    • AJWjr.

      I don't care–back seat, shotgun, strapped to the fucking tailfins, just as long as they all go.

    • tessiee

      Now I'm picturing hundreds of Hoverrounds sailing over the cliff like lemmings.

  • BlueMonkeh

    From Bob Cesca:

    Check your calendars. It’s been how long since a right-wing freakdog went on a killing spree in Norway?

  • metamarcisf

    Many of us already respect Col. Allen "Pigford" West for his support of women in the kitchen. Driving the GOP clown car off the cliff a la "Thelma and Louise" is the next logical step in his quest for the Nobel Prize in Analingus.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Why didn't they watch the whole movie? The party whip couldn't keep their attention for longer than 15 seconds?

    • DaRooster

      He forgot the Junior Mints.

  • Arken

    They're going to need a getaway car if they cause a default. They better get a sturdy one though, one resistant to pitchforks and torches.

  • WinterOuthouse

    Kevin McCarthy displays incredible managerial brio

    • tessiee

      I kinda liked him in "invasion of the Body Snatchers".

  • Lucidamente1

    What, Blockbuster was out of "The Birth of a Nation?"

    • EatsBabyDingos

      The new version is "Afterbirth of a Nation." It's not pretty.

  • Kevin McCarthy could have shown a clip from anything–AARP ad, travel video from Mogadishu–and Allen West would have responded the same way.

    He was just so thrilled to be asked to join the cool guys.

    • Terry

      He probably offered to operate the AV equipment.

      • DaRooster

        When you hear the "bing", turn the filmstrip.

        (Something he could handle)

    • Oblios_Cap

      He was just so thrilled to be asked to join the cool white guys.

      Fixed

    • Didn't Kevin McCarthy used to hang around the edges of the Brat Pack?

  • EatsBabyDingos

    Shoulda watched Apocolypse Now and the cow killing scene. Redub the cow with Uncle Sam, then split him in half, and watch both halves die. #repubwinning!

    • FNMA

      Or, Kurtz: "We must kill them. We must incinerate them. Pig after pig… cow after cow… village after village… army after army… "

  • FNMA

    Should'a watched "Who's Nailin' Pailin."
    "Who's ready to fuck the country?"

  • MissusBarry

    Allen West will try to drive the car over the wimmens' heads and up their uterii.

  • Pragmatist2

    I think they watched porn because they are certainly screwing the country.

    • DashboardBuddha

      For them, this is essentially porn. They're that fucked up.

  • Tundra Grifter

    I thought Rick Santorum was the authority on giving until it hurts. Send them to the Hurt Hut.

    Then, of course, there's the Big Hurt. Hurt So Good. And The Hurt Locker.

    • Doktor Zoom

      True story–not long after it came out, I was trying to remember the name of that last movie, and all I could come up with was "The Pain Box"

  • Goonemeritus

    If you want to really get them whipped up show the libertarian classic Mad Max.

  • freakishlywrong

    I've not seen this film, are those union thugs?

  • Tonight's entertainment: Deliverance. The oldz and poorz are powerfully portrayed by Ned Beatty. "This one here has a real purdy mouth, ain't he?".

    • tessiee

      In one of life's little ironies, right winger Jon Voight is the one who had a purty mouth (which his daughter Angelina Jolie inherited).

  • Lucidamente1

    They might also consider "Beavis and Butthead do America."

    • BlueMonkeh

      Compared to these asshats, B&B are sympathetic characters that we can all cheer on to scoring.

    • horsedreamer_1

      "You wear braces. I wear braces too".

      One of my favourite movie lines/pick-up lines. Still.

    • genxr

      Them tea party kids won't stop a-whackin' in mah trailer.

  • bureaucrap

    "Hey Kevin, is it all right if we hurt people just for the fun of it?"

  • After showing the clip, Rep. Allen West Stepin Fetchit (R-Fla.), one of the most outspoken critics of leadership…

    • Swampgas_Man

      Stephen Fetchit had more dignity and less rage issues than West ever will.

  • MissusBarry

    Why do I think this was followed by a circle jerk?

    • Maybe just followed by a jerk. Glenn Beck comes to mind.

      • MissusBarry

        That's a very pleasant moniker for such an unpleasant sack of santorum-shit-for-brains-ass-fuck-cowardly-luncatic-fuckwad-idiot.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Why bother? The whole thing's a circle jerk from the git-go; only change seems to be who's going to be the pivot man on any given day.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Followed by?

  • / snark off
    First an apology if of late my posts have been more sermonly than snarkly. Second, a request for a group om mani padme om for a daughter-in-law of this recovering Catholic Calvanist (don’t ask) and currently at best a slightly spiritual agnostic. We just learned that the mom of our youngest, and less than 1-year old, grandbaby has stage 4 colorectal cancer. In the past dozen years, she’s the third person under 40 I know personally who have contracted this disease. Too often symptoms don’t show up until this kind of cancer has metastasized. If any of you sub-50 Wonketteers have colorectal cancer in your family trees, push, cajole, threaten yer doc into giving you the scope. This isn’t just something we oldes should worry about.
    / snark on

    Thema & Louise didn't try to pack 300 mil plus folks in the back of their car before they drove off the cliff. just sayin'

    • My thoughts are with you

    • So sorry for what you're going through, wj. I lost my Pops to colon cancer >20 yrs ago before the scope was performed diagnostically. My sibs and I get tested often to get those inevitable polyps snipped. The anesthetist always asks if I want to be 'conversational' while they stick the scope where the sun don't shine. My response? "Uh, no, what do I look like, Katie Couric?" Anyway, thanks for the reminder.

    • Barb

      Oh my God, this breaks my heart. This has to be a highly stressful time for everyone involved. I just want to come and get you and take you for ice cream and have a good cry.

    • Limeylizzie

      Oh Weejee, I am so sorry, lots of good thoughts to your family and especially to that young mother and baby.

    • EatsBabyDingos

      I'm sorry to hear that, weejee. Thoughts, prayers, chakras, oms, and dervishes whirling are all for you and your family today.

    • Thanks all, it means a lot. It really does.

    • SayItWithWookies

      That's horrible news, weejee — a friend of mine just died from colorectal cancer and he was in his mid-40s. I hope for the best for you and your family.

    • MissusBarry

      I'm so sorry to hear that, Weej. My thoughts are with you and your family.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Oh man, weejee, I hate to hear this. I've had Hodgkins twice and it ain't fun, but colorectal is nasty stuff. I'll be thinking of you and yours, and offering many positive prayers.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Thoughts and weebles go out. Man, I keep putting that tube job off. Guess I'd better man up.

    • not that Dewey

      We're here for you. Lost a grandfather to this very condition, and I don't want to see it happen to others.

      At 42, and I've had 3 colonoscopies and 12 benign polyps removed. It's probably only a matter of time for many of us.

    • AJWjr.

      Drag City, weejee. All the best to you and yours.

    • ThundercatHo

      I don't know what an om mani padme om is but I will gladly send positive thoughts and good wishes as substitute for prayers for your daughter in law. My dad had CR cancer but I think it was the prostate CA that killed him.

    • fuflans

      oh weejee so very very sorry.

    • Doktor Zoom

      Sending positive thoughts in the direction of Cee addle for you, weejee.

    • BlueMonkeh

      So sorry for your troubles. They make my personal whinetittery seem idiotic.

    • Extemporanus2b

      Lo, let us now commence the group Padma Lakshmi manhandling, until her taut, tawny skin glows with the all-healing dewy blush of one thousand weejee-loving Wonketteers!

      (Stay strong for her, my friend…)

      • Missed your posts yesterday with my mind in a more serious fog than normal. Welcome back bud. Does your avatarcide reflect you having any up close encounters of the griz kind, metaphorically or otherwise?

        • Extemporanus

          Didn't miss much — just a late night Layne-and-nostalgia-inspired dumb drive-by, and an uninspired attempt to troll you libunatics into thinking I was the, uh, troll all along.

          Alas, I'm just passing through, but couldn't let your comment go without giving you a supportive cyber-squeeze on the old arthritic shoulder. You and yours have all my best as you fight to beat this goddamn fucking thing, and beat it you sure as hell can.

          Regarding my bloody avatard: That headshot went up a couple months ago when I decided to [try to] give myself my walking papers. A metaphorical marijuana bear — that's what you mean by "griz kind", right? — was, as far as I can recall, in no way involved.

          (Grrr, dude…you holdin'?)

    • GOPCrusher

      And yet, Dick Cheney lives.

    • ragarlove

      I set up an account just to reply to this. Had a college buddy who was Stage 4 colon/rectal @ 47yrs old. He turns 52 next month cancer free — after 3 rounds of chemo, two liver resections and part of his lung removed. It is a tough fight, but it can be won. Be positive!! Find a positive doctor who is willing to fight. Don't pay attention to statistics. If one person has survived this, then another one can — that's all that matters. Incurable does NOT mean terminal. Many people live with cancer. She can hang in there till the right treatment is found. Pray because it works (don't know how, but it does). Pray for liver resection, and find a doctor who will do it. That is curative!

  • Limeylizzie

    Oh fuck these lunatics in the arsehole, I am sick to the back teeth of all this stupidity.

    • DashboardBuddha

      Well said, love.

      • Limeylizzie

        Well, they really are so ignorant and that one new Illinois House member, some Irish name , makes me want to punch him in the throat everytime I see him, he symbolises all these Teabaggers perfectly for me.

        • For me it's Flake from AZ. He just sooo proud of not knowing a damn thing.

          • Limeylizzie

            <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joe_Walsh_(Illinois_politician)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joe_Walsh_(Illinois_… />This loudmouthed moron, always saying that Obama was elected due to White guilt.

          • FNMA

            Joe Walsh hasn't been the same since he joined the Eagles. I fuckin' hate the Eagles.

          • BaldarTFlagass

            Fuck you man! You don't like my fucking comments, get your own fucking blog!

          • AJWjr.

            That smarmy cunt…

          • Limeylizzie

            Hey there, I had a message from your significant other on Ravelry last night! Adorable cat you guys have!

          • AJWjr.

            Oh she's not MY S/O, her hubby wouldn't like that, not at all. But Caffy is a nice kitteh.

          • Limeylizzie

            Oh, I thought you were a charming couple! Sorry.

          • AJWjr.

            Yes, our avatars would make beautiful babbies!

        • fuflans

          and the district he represents is the very definition of suburban wasteland.

          • Limeylizzie

            Isn't he a bastard?

          • fuflans

            yeah and tools like this seem to be the only ones getting coverage.

            if i landed on planet US america this AM i would know that this is bamz' fault, the repubs have bent over backward to accomodate him and it is only dems who will suffer at the polls.

            and that's from fucking npr.

        • GOPCrusher

          I think it's that smug look they get on their face when they say "I represent Americans….", it's like they know they don't and they got one over on the public by getting elected.

    • freakishlywrong

      Imagine how Ben Affleck feels?

      • horsedreamer_1

        He thought he'd never know a bigger ass than J-Lo's.

    • elviouslyqueer

      This this THIS. Thank you, lizzie. Also, case in point (with the possible exception of Steve Cohen). Goddamn idiots, the lot of them.

      • Limeylizzie

        I also really despise that bitch, Marsha Blackburn, if i were a lesbian, and full-disclosure I had a wet-Maddow dream last night, I would get her all sexed up and hot for me, then pull up her big-girl panties and beat the shit out of her.

        • Papa_Uniform

          Ah Lizzie, you're such a cunt tease.

          • Limeylizzie

            Oh my God, I was just sitting here in the nude on Wonkette, when a man appeared on my balcony-10th Floor- and started washing the windows! It was like a porn film form the 70s except I didn't invite him in, rather I went and put on a robe.

          • GOPCrusher

            Bow-chicka-bow-chicka-bow

          • FNMA

            "You can imagine where it goes from here."
            "He fixes the cable?"

  • Terry

    A better movie for them would have been Driving Miss Daisy and point out to them that the Koch Brothers are Miss Daisy in this case.

  • mumbly_joe

    the independent-minded caucus

    Bwahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

  • baconzgood

    “I need your help. I can’t tell you what it is. You can never ask me about it later.”

    John Ensign? is that you?

  • EatsBabyDingos

    The rethug logic reminds me too much of Blazing Saddles where the Clevon Little character holds a gun to his head and says "nobody move or the black guy gets it!," except that the movie was a comedy and this appears to be a ketamin nightmare.

  • Goonemeritus

    Congressman West seems kind of easy to influence. I suppose the gay community should be relieved they didn’t show Victor Victoria.

  • Oblios_Cap
  • Radiotherapy®

    Brokeback Mountain would have been perfect.

    • Barb

      You will never hear them say, "I can't quit you" They quit us from the start.

      • PsycWench

        Obviously Sarah Palin wasn't involved in producing that movie, mavericky though it might have been.

    • DaRooster

      "We're gonna hurt some people… but it'll feel good for us."

  • Until I see the stock market drop 1,000 points in the opening minutes, not to mention 10 Year T-notes yields spiking (they're at 2.98% right now, people…near the 6 month lows), I am considering all of this to be kabuki.

    Why should the GOP give in when every day, they get more of their insane agenda handed to them by the Democrats who still allegedly control 2/3 of the government?
    ~

    • BlueMonkeh

      exactly

      that's all i got

      too depressing a reality this morning

  • SorosBot

    There was me, that is Boner, and my three droogs, that is Cantor, Whippy, and Token West, and we sat in the Capitol ginbar trying to make up our rassoodocks what to do with the evening. The Capitol ginbar sold gin-plus, gin plus vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom, which is what we were drinking. This would sharpen you up and make you ready for a bit of the old ultra-violence.

    • freakishlywrong

      Well, Boner IS orange…

    • BaldarTFlagass

      …Our pockets were full of Koch money, so there was no need on that score, and, as they say, money is everything.

  • Did the clip have subliminal innuendo spliced in? Something like "Have a Koch and A Smile" — only more like a shit-eating grin if McCarthy wants to get his point across.

  • genxr

    If we show them Atlas Shrugged will they Go Galt and leave us the fuck alone?

  • anniegetyerfun

    “I’m ready to drive the car,” West replied, surprising many Republicans by giving his full deep-throated support for the plan.

    • Limeylizzie

      Surprising many Republicans, who were amazed that a black man had a driving license as they had planned on the lack thereof as being a great way to disenfranchise many Democratic voters.

  • freakishlywrong

    And these fuckwits accuse the POTUS of not being serious, a leader, tyrannical? ___________ (insert insert insult of the day here).

    • BlueMonkeh

      Oh Kriste on a Kracker, I had to open my email last night and see the subject line from "my senator" GOOPER milquetoast about Obama "not leading" on the debt issue.

      It's all I can do to stay at my desk and be a good little plebe today.

      • GOPCrusher

        GOP Dictionary:
        Leadership (n) 1. Rolling over and taking it up the ass without making a sound.
        ie. Sen. Larry Craig was looking to show off his leadership skills in the Minneapolis Airport.

    • FNMA

      The go-to quote, from Frank Booth: "Fuck you, you fucking fucks."

    • tessiee

      "accuse the POTUS of not being serious, a leader"

      They'd better hope and pray to their buddy Jeebus that President Pushover NEVER decides to be a leader, because that would *start* with him telling the whole bunch of him to suck his big black dick, because he's through bending over for them, and anybody who wasn't ready to do what he said could get the fuck out of Dodge.

      *sigh*

      I can dream, can't I?

  • Wolvereeeeeeeens!!!!!

    • BaldarTFlagass

      I was just thinking if they remastered that movie with the faces of Muslims on the Russians, it would really go over big. And Ron O'Neal looks a little Arab-y anyway.

      • Limeylizzie

        MrLimeylizzie designed that movie, I am so proud!

  • baconzgood

    The Whip showing a Ben Affleck film to people so they will vote for a bill? What's next?

    "Now I'm going to explain why you should vote for this bill through the majesty of interprative dance."

    • DashboardBuddha

      OT: Back when I was an employment counselor, our director thought this dude in town who did expressive therapy was the bee's knees so of course we had to have a week long "team building" session. Long story short, yes…it was hell. But it was a hell capped off by this guy doing an interpretive dance about how he kicked cocaine. We were torn between implosive cringing and hysterical laughter. Later on, I worked up a parody of said dance that never failed to get a laugh. (Dash…do the Cocaine Dance…do the Cocaine Dance!!!) So, I guess in that sense, team-building mission accomplished.

      Oh yeah, last time I saw him he had tattooed his face with Maori tribal markings…and he was driving a Subaru. Bold statements, both.

      • baconzgood

        Dash's friends: Dash…do the Cocaine Dance…do the Cocaine Dance!!!

        Dash: Ok pony up some of that Columbian yayo first.

        • DashboardBuddha

          "Ok pony up some of that Columbian yayo first. "

          Unlikely. Everyone I worked with was in one (and several) form of recovery or another: Drugs, alcohol, food, sex, ACOA, Codependency, sex, etc. They once considered doing an "intervention" on me because a co-worker stopped by when I was burning incense. Shit…I just like the smell of the stuff.

          • baconzgood

            SUUUUUUUUUUUUURE!!!

          • DashboardBuddha

            I wish the opposite were true. Short answer – I like weed…it doesn't like me.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      "Dude, I finally got the venue I wanted. I'm Performing my dance quintet–you know, my cycle–at John Boehner's K Street Theatre on Tuesday night, and I'd love it if you came and gave me notes."

      • baconzgood

        Is that near the In and Out Burger?

        • horsedreamer_1

          Those are some good burgers, Bacon.

          • baconzgood

            Shut the fuck up Donny.

    • Buckminster

      I once went to an employer-mandated employee education seminar where the first session was a screening of "12 Angry Men."

      That was the only part of the training worth remembering. The rest was crap.

      • ShaveTheWhales

        "The Grid"? Man, that was a looong time ago.

  • Come here a minute

    Poor analogy — GOP congressmen need no convincing to use violence at any time, on the poors and the olds, or whoever.

    • AJWjr.

      Still, they make me want to kill the fuck out of them with fucking votes, man.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    How ironic is it that this guy is named Kevin McCarthy, same as the star of the seminal 1950s sci-fi flick "Invasion of the Body Snatchers?

    They're here already! You're next! You're next, You're next…!

    • Literally and metaphorical McCarthyism.

    • Geminisunmars

      He was also in the pretty good '78 remake in a cameo.

    • FNMA

      Somebody should check the Capitol basement for pods…

  • DaRooster

    "Sweaty, excited faces feces all around!"

    There… that's more like it… Dickheads!

  • I'd like to see them show "Priscillca, Queen of the Desesrt", with West offering to drive the bus.

  • philpjfry

    They should have shown something inspirational like "Grapes of Wrath"

    • freakishlywrong

      Today. We are all jalopy driving Joads.

    • Geminisunmars

      Ewww! Poors!

    • FNMA

      They would laughed their asses off. To them, it's a comedy.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Ben Affleck? they should have watched Gigli.

    • tessiee

      Is this one of those Zen thingies?
      Because I thought, "Even they don't deserve such torment"
      Then I thought, "Oh, yes, they do"
      Then I thought, "No they don't"
      Etc.

  • powersuit

    Gotta keep things simple for most of those guys.

    I thought they would have picked The Warriors. Obamer sounds a lot like that disc jockey lady after all.

  • How hard did Boner cry when the troops rallied?

  • I'd recommend Warhol's "Empire," if only to keep them busy for eight hours plus.

    • crybabyboehner

      Women in Revolt

    • not that Dewey

      In the future, everyone will watch an Andy Warhol movie for fifteen minutes.

      • user-of-owls

        In the future, every fifteen minutes Andy Warhol will watch everyone watching a movie.

  • I would have watched Eraser Head. It makes more sense than all this crap.

    • FNMA

      In heaven, everything is fine.

  • arihaya

    now i wish Obammy watched that "Army of Darkness" movie .. and after that go to the debt ceiling meeting by yelling:

    "THIS IS MY … BOOMSTICK.. i mean,,, VETO! "

    • MissTaken

      Hail to the king, baby.

    • genxr

      "I do solemnly swear to uphold and defend the Constitution to … mumble mumble mumble"

      "What? I said it ! I said the words!"

    • GOPCrusher

      SHOP SMART. SHOP S MART.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Don't these fuckers realize that Ben Affleck is a liberal?

    • El Pinche

      Unfortunately, their other choice was Daniel Baldwin in Bio-Dome.

      • not that Dewey

        Remind me again — is that the fundie nutjob Baldwin, or the crackhead Baldwin?

        • genxr

          Six of one…

        • El Pinche

          For some reason my replies are being eaten…some keyword I was using (not rxtxrd). But GC is correct.

      • Doktor Zoom

        They might have found Mr. Baldwin's Sharks in Venice inspiring, too.

      • GOPCrusher

        Stephen. Daniel is the one that has the drug and arrest record. He also got kicked off Celebrity Rehab for sending lewd texts to Mary Carey.

    • MissTaken

      Just like whenever they pick a song to play at campaign events they get a cease and desist letter because all decent musicians are liberals, too. Not only are they fuckers, they're also dumb!

  • MrFizzy

    They should screen Gigli for the repubelickins – they would all commit suicide and we could get our fucking country back.

  • widestanceroman

    Worst remake of 'Driving Miss Daisy' EVER.

  • El Pinche

    I liken the GOP to the homo-sex still shot sequence in "My Own Private Idaho." Watch the freeze frame of Boehner teabagging both Koch's shriveled up balls. Gohmert's ooh face while taking from behind by the Home Depot CEO. Etc Etc

  • SayItWithWookies

    Was he trying to get his caucus motived to vote for the bill or to kill it? 'Cause the only people being hurt if Boehner's bill passed would be the Tea Party constituency. And really, the only appropriate movie they should be quoting from is Fellini's Satyricon, which starts with one narrative and then goes further and further into stories within stories and digressions within digressions that by about halfway through it the viewer has completely lost touch with the original plot. But such a metaphor might be a little too subtle for our dear GOP.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Apropos of, I'm thinking Caligula might be a safe bet. What with the horse fucking and all.

    • tessiee

      "might be a little too subtle for our dear GOP. "

      Plus, it's all foreigners, yaknow.

  • Duly_Noted

    Maybe show them "The Road" so they can see just where they're leading (leading?) the country.

  • LiveToServeYa

    This is not constructive violence I can believe in.

  • riverside68

    My vote is for "The Unforgiven"

    everyone dies, there is no lesson

    • BaldarTFlagass

      HE HAD IT COMING! THEY ALL HAVE IT COMING!

  • MinAgain

    They should have watched "Deliverance", instead, because they're all furiously paddling the Canoe of State down a raging river, and America is gonna get screwed, as a result.

    • Oblios_Cap

      I refuse to squeal like a pig while they're doing it.

  • BlueStateLibel

    Meanwhile, the Democrats watched Ben Afleek in "The Sum of All Fears," where he tries valiantly to avert disaster but fails, and a big city is blown up, the end.

  • GhostBuggy

    Jesus Christ, what a fucking horror show these people are.

  • AddHomonym

    Needs moar "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!"

  • Weenus299

    Dude, they couldn't have used Jesus Christ Superstar?

  • GlowneyHouse

    I can imagine them sitting down together to watch the Big Lebowski, loudly booing Jeff Bridges every screen appearance and wondering aloud why David Huddleston's character is so mistreated, maligned and misunderstood.

    • BaldarTFlagass

      Plus, the hot trophy wife. "I'm just gonna find a cash machine."

  • not that Dewey

    Resevoir Dogs was a great movie about a bunch of criminals who all panicked when their plan fell apart and then turned on each other.

    But I don't see any parallels to the present situation.

    • Radiotherapy®

      There was a Mr. Pink and Mr. White, but was there a Mr. Orange?

      • not that Dewey
      • SorosBot

        That was Tim Roth; how could you forget?

    • Radiotherapy®

      Also, we are all being tortured enhanced interrogated by being Stuck in the Middle

      • not that Dewey

        aka the "Bipartisan Stomp"

  • Rosie_Scenario

    "Young Guns"

  • ThundercatHo

    What about "Troy"? Brad and Orlando all sweaty in leather skirts, Helen as SP substitute, and then the whole fucking empire goes up in flames. As a bonus lots of homoeroticism and very bad acting.

  • Eve8Apples

    "Titanic" would have been a more appropriate flick. West can enthusiastically offer to drive the beautiful big boat straight into an iceberg and kill alot of innocent passengers in the process.

    • genxr

      "The position of these deck chairs is destroying the ship's hull!"

      or

      "We cannot stay afloat if we just leave the deck chairs where they've always been!"

  • SayItWithWookies

    Oh, you know what would be a great representative movie for this occasion? That Michael Douglas-Kathleen Turner abomination War of the Roses — in which two horribly awful people are divorcing and become so intransigent that they entirely lose sight of what they're supposed to be doing and spend two hours doing stupid, pointless, sadistic things to each other until they both die. Two solid hours of rich, crass materialists hating each other and wrecking their own lives for no good reason. Also I think the producers of that piece of shit thought it was a comedy — which only adds to the appropriateness.

    • Danny de Vito has the best line of the film (which, I agree, was less than brilliant) "Carol can't come to the phone right now – she's sucking my dick! (hangs up)
      I love wrong numbers."
      I think that was War of the Roses. but, whatever.

  • ttommyunger

    "I'm ready to drive the car….." That's right, boy; if we go by car, you'll be driving. If we go by bus, you'll ride in the very back. That's the Republican Way for your kind, because you're "near".

  • thefrontpage

    What the story doesn't include is that these other film clips were also shown at the meeting:

    1. "I'll make him an offer he can't refuse." –"The Godfather."

    2. "Some men just want to see the world burn." –"The Dark Knight."

    3. "You lookin' at me? You lookin' at me?" —"Taxi Driver."

    4. "Go ahead…make my day." —"Sudden Impact."

    5. "THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!" —"The Exorcist."

  • proudgrampa

    "Bullitt" The fiery crash at the end of the chase scene. That's where we're headed if West drives…

  • freakishlywrong

    Apparently, BAfflec has reacted. He suggested The Company Men as a better choice for the teatards. The beatings will commence at noon.

  • Dan

    The Tea Party and Terrorism Link Gets Stronger by the Day, as demonstrated here > http://wp.­me/pNmlT-I­i

  • Buckminster

    Pubbies have no attention span.

    Wait, a butterfly!

  • fuflans

    well i for one am going ignore all this nonsense and read up on the hapsburgs or something.

  • DahBoner

    OK boys, let's have a little fun together by crushing these bunnies.

    You know you like it…

  • SenileAgitation

    Can't Obama just invoke the constitutional bit, cut out the middle-madmen and raise the limit his self? I thought I read somewhere that is an option. Christ it's time to ask "what would Cheney do?" As far as GOP bunker entertainment, what's wrong with Men in Tights?

    • tessiee

      "As far as GOP bunker entertainment, what's wrong with Men in Tights?"

      You mean the movie, or actual men in tights?

  • Geminisunmars

    It seems to me that they've been watching nothing but "Pollyanna".

  • genxr

    Rep Allan West stood up and said, "I'm ready to water our nation's crops with Brawndo. It's got what plants crave!"

    • FNMA

      It has electrolytes!

  • MissTaken

    Surprised they didn't watch 300:

    Tiny band of soldiers fighting a much larger army
    Drug induced prophecy
    Men in panties, nonstop

  • smitallica

    Someone should've told Allen West that he didn't need to volunteer to drive the car. Since he was the only black in the room, the others would've EXPECTED him to drive.

  • Guppy06

    West had to step up and volunteer to drive, before one of those silly girls tried to get behind the wheel.

  • Native_of_SL_UT

    Wouldn't it have been better if they just showed a clip from The Fifth Element where Bruce Willis shoots the alien leader in the head and asks "Does anyone else want to negotiate?"

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    I heard they were going to rent Caligula, but it was too similar to their normal caucus meetings, and so not that enlightening.

  • crybabyboehner

    Need something with that Barton Fink feeling.

  • Swampgas_Man

    Shoulda been The Looney Tunes Movie, starring Obama as the Roadrunner and Boehnner as the Coyote.

  • It puts the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the "no" vote again.

  • This is good news for Ben Affleck. (see http://www.gurukalehuru.com)

  • Negropolis

    The Tiny Penis-Tiny Brain Club (The GOP) strikes again. Boy, the power of insecurity.

  • tessiee

    "Ben WHO-fleck?" — Mango

  • tessiee

    Ben Affleck?

    Sorry, but if it's something involving the word "mayhem", I insist upon at least Brad Pitt or better.

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